The Villains Of Valley View (2022) s01e20 Episode Script

1
♪♪
Hey, Valley Viewers!
It's my favorite time of
the year, Christmas time!
And I'm gonna tell you
a story about a family,
but not just any family.
They're supervillains!
So, grab some cocoa and
hang on to your candy canes,
because this is "How the
Villains Stole Christmas."
[JINGLE BELLS]
["DECK THE HALLS" PLAYING]
[HARTLEY] It all happened
one Christmas Eve,
not so long ago in Centropolis,
a city where superheroes
and supervillains
roam the streets
amongst ordinary people.
And where those villains strive to make
everyone's life miserable.
And this night before Christmas
was no different
All right, the sun just set!
That means it's
officially Christmas Eve!
[ALL CHEER]
Ah, my favorite night of the year!
Yeah, because we get to steal all
these great decorations to admire.
[ALL] Huh?
I mean, light on fire.
We're villains. Christmas bad!
Most importantly, it's time for Onyx's
annual "Ruin Christmas Challenge"!
That's right! Tonight,
every villain competes
to find the best way to ruin Christmas
for this city of unsuspecting saps!
Oh, I can't wait to bah their humbugs!
Yeah, and even though I don't
have my villain power yet,
I'm finally old enough
to compete this year!
I can't wait to see sad
people and think, "I did that!"
Aw! Look who's finally tall
enough to ride the ride.
Chaos, I didn't want to do this to you,
but you leave me no choice.
He has an imaginary friend named Laura.
He eats with her, tells her jokes,
and on certain occasions,
I've caught him kissing her.
Please tell me you
left after the kissing.
- I wish I had.
- [LAUGHING]
[CHUCKLES] Anyway, I am sure
to win the Onyx's challenge,
because I have the kids with powers,
and you have the cute, but useless one.
Hey! Number Three is a great kid!
I'm glad I lost that coin toss!
Mom, I have the perfect idea!
The Centropolis Christmas tree
lighting ceremony is tonight.
We should steal the tree before they get
- the chance to light it.
- [GASPS]
People look forward to
that tree lighting all year!
Oh, that's the perfect thing to ruin.
[CHUCKLES] Right up there
with funerals and weddings.
Yeah.
Yeah, that is a great idea.
Imagine everyone's faces
when the curtains part
to reveal their glorious
holiday tree is missing.
It'll ruin Christmas for the whole city!
Okay, what are we gonna do
with a 30-foot Christmas tree?
Keep it in here! This place
could use a little cheer.
Our main decoration is mildew.
All right, while you're all doing
your little gardening project,
Number Three and I will be
kicking back, 'cause we've already
- finished our plan.
- That's right, we did.
[GRUNTING]
That would've been more
impressive if I hadn't
watched you awkwardly practice
it for six hours straight.
Every year, there is one hot
ticket Christmas gift item
that every parent must have
for their child, and this year,
- it's this go-kart!
- [HORN HONKING]
Whoo-hoo!
And the best part is no one will
be able to get their hands on one,
because we already cleaned out
the entire stock of go-karts
from every store in town.
- Can I switch teams?
- No!
Their plan is cute, but
it doesn't come close
to stealing the biggest
Christmas tree in the city.
Really? 'Cause I think
the go-kart thing is
Ours is better!
We'll see. May the best villain win!
Mwah-ha-ha!
Eh, don't ya
mean, "Mwah-ho-ho"?
Please don't ruin this.
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
So while Kraniac and
Number Three set out
to ruin Christmas by preventing parents
from buying their kids
the must-have holiday gift,
Havoc, Surge, and
Chaos were off to steal
the Centropolis Christmas tree.
And just to be clear, I'm
only reading the story.
I do not endorse this kind of behavior!
["DECK THE HALLS" PLAYING]
[SIGHS] Look at all these dopes!
"Oh, we have to see the tree!"
SPOILER ALERT: It's a tree.
And she is gorgeous.
You know, maybe you
should just date the tree.
At least it's real! [LAUGHS]
Perhaps your brother's right
and we're not getting
what all the hype is about.
[CHUCKLES]
Nope, still a stupid tree.
OK, uh, Chaos,
let's grab the tree and go!
I'll make sure no one's looking.
[GASPS] Ew!
What do you think you're doing?
Uh, I think the real question
is, what are you doing?
Shouldn't you be at the mall asking
Santa for Taylor Swift tickets
and glittery eyeshadow?
[LAUGHS] It's funny,
'cause she's a tween!
Oh, look who's got jokes.
Are you a supervillain
or a reject from open mic
night at the Chuckle Hut?
Get lost, kid, we're busy.
Don't call me kid, my name's Savannah.
Well, whatever your name
is, can I borrow your mittens
to lift this thing? I can't
afford to get a splinter.
I do villain hand modeling on the side.
Pretty sad you think
these would fit you.
Although, you do have dainty fingers.
And I'm not letting you get away
with stealing our city's tree!
My family comes to this
tree lighting every year!
You'll ruin Christmas!
Oh, from your lips to Onyx's ears.
Um, this tree is gonna be ours,
and we're not letting some
yappy twerp get in our way.
That's it. I'm gonna go
find a police officer.
Or maybe a superhero!
[SCOFFS] Havoc, stop her!
Don't worry, I got this, with a
little holiday vocal manipulation.
Officer! I need your help!
I need my diaper changed!
What I'm trying to say is,
I made a Christmas messy!
[GROANS]
Okay, I got it!
Should I put it in the "trunk"?
[CHUCKLING]
Yeah, I'm starting to see why
your girlfriend is imaginary.
Must feel weird to be out of uniform.
Yeah, I feel so boring and unremarkable.
Is this what it's like to be you?
Shh! You hear that?
The sound of bad
parenting? Loud and clear.
No, it's the sweet
sound of all these fools
desperately searching for
this year's must-have gift.
And with every store
comes more disappointment!
It's beautiful!
What's going on here?
You know how someone stole
all the smart go-karts
that everyone wanted off the shelves?
Actually, they stole them
before they hit the shelves.
I heard.
Well, this store has one
left. The display model.
- So they're raffling it off.
- Wait, what?
I'm buying a ton of raffle tickets.
That way, even if the
elf doesn't pull mine,
I can at least give my kid a receipt
with a note that says, "I tried."
Did you hear that? You
forgot the display model!
No! I was lookout. You
forgot the display model!
Well, part of being a lookout
is to be on the lookout
for any go-karts left behind,
like the display model!
Oh, I'm sorry, I was
probably too distracted by you
rattling off your famous
villain catchphrase:
"Is anyone coming? Is anyone coming?"
Okay, look, if we are
gonna win Onyx's challenge,
we have to ruin Christmas for everyone,
which means we have to get
our hands on that last go-kart,
or one kid is gonna
unwrap it tomorrow morning
and have a merry
Christmas. Now, are you in?
Sure. I mean, you've
already ruined my childhood,
why not ruin someone else's?
You know, I think I'm starting to get
all this Christmas tree
hype. Do you smell that?
The sweet scent of a
freshly cut Douglas fir?
Mm, no. The sweet scent of
a freshly stolen Douglas fir.
True. But you know what's
even better than that?
This! It's a candle that
smells like a gingerbread man!
Which I hate! With
their beady raisin eyes
and scrumptious little arms and legs.
Ahh, nothing brings
me more holiday cheer
than robbing everyone else of theirs.
We are definitely winning
Onyx's challenge this year.
- [CHUCKLES]
- [RUSTLING]
- [ELECTRICITY WHIRRING]
- What was that?
[GASPS] I bet it's a small animal.
Probably a squirrel.
Those things are shiftier than we are.
Oh! Or maybe a turtle
dove. Probably two.
They come in pairs and
love Christmas trees.
At least, that's what the
song has led me to believe.
[CHUCKLES] Can we please put
a stop to the holiday songs
and figure out what's
actually in this tree?
Sure, Mom. Why don't you go first?
[RUSTLING]
- [EXCLAIMS]
- [ALL SCREAM]
Told ya I wasn't letting
you get away with this.
Oh, it's even worse than
an animal. It's a tween!
So when Savannah tried
to stop the villains
from stealing the Centropolis
Christmas tree by hiding inside of it,
Havoc, Surge, and Chaos
got quite the surprise.
And while most people would've
safely returned her to her family,
being villains, they, uh, dealt with it
in a very different way.
So this is where you
nasty villains live?
Makes sense.
Hey, I know it doesn't look like much,
but at least if you trip down here,
the cockroaches will break your fall.
- What are you doing?
- [PHONE CLICKS]
Taking a pic so I can
text an encrypted link
to the police with a geo-pin attached.
Sorry, I don't speak chatty
brat. Can you explain?
She's gonna send that
picture to the cops
and tell them where our secret lair is.
Oh, no, she isn't.
Give me that phone.
Yeah, right. If my parents
can't get it away from me,
you don't stand a chance.
I just need to find
some reception down here.
Give it up! You're not getting
out of here with that phone!
Like some kid could
actually pull one over on us.
Wait, where'd she go?
We can't let a child
outsmart three supervillains.
If we can hold an
entire planet for ransom,
we can snatch a phone from her!
Exactly!
Wait, we held an entire planet
for ransom? Where was I for that?
Oh, you blacked out in orbit.
We just let you drift for a while.
Come on, we have to find her!
- [RUSTLING]
- Shh!
Quiet!
[RUSTLING]
I think she's back in the tree!
- [SCREAMING]
- [CHITTERING]
Oh, yup! There's your squirrel.
- Later, fools!
- [JAKE] Get her!
♪♪
[LAUGHS SINISTERLY]
So, what's the plan? How
do we get the last go-kart?
I just drop this raffle ticket
into the bin, and we win.
Check it out. I used
my alias, "Jack McWaxy."
It's from a spy novel I'm working on.
Sounds McTerrible.
And you only bought one ticket.
People are buying hundreds!
It doesn't matter. I signed
mine with magnetic ink.
So you can put it on the fridge
next to your Evil Kittens calendar?
I just have to get that elf
to put on this magnetic glove.
So that our ticket
wins.
And then you and I ride
off into the sunset.
Or however far a go-kart will take us.
Just have to find a way to
get this glove on that elf.
I got it!
[JINGLE BELLS]
Son, I've never been more proud
and ashamed of you at the same time.
I can't believe that
elf took your bribe.
Eh. She's an elf at a go-kart raffle.
She was just happy to go home.
How do I get out of this dump?
Just give us that phone, kid! You'll
never get any reception down here!
Really? You're villains, you
couldn't steal a little 5G?
[EVA]
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
Don't you know who you're dealing with?
A bunch of idiots?
[SCOFFS]
A bunch of idiots who have you cornered!
Oh. So you admit you're idiots.
No! Just him.
Stand back, or I'm using this thing!
Big whoop! That barely does anything.
[SCOFFS] Yeah. It's just
a device our dad created
to temporary blind our enemies.
Uh-oh.
[ELECTRONIC WHOOSHING]
[ALL GROANING]
- Ha-ha! See ya!
- Get her!
Aah! Got her!
- That's me!
- Oh. Right.
Should've known by the dainty fingers!
I do not have dainty fingers!
[ALL SCREAM, GROAN]
Ooh, that was actually
quite nice. [LAUGHS]
How is she beating us?
We have superpowers!
Yeah? Well, then maybe
it's time we use them.
- [HISSES]
- [HIGH PITCHED SHRIEK]
Wow. I thought I screamed loud.
Well, Savannah, you got game.
But what we got, is your phone.
So much for your plan to expose us!
- Give it back!
- [CHUCKLES]
Not until I erase any
evidence of where we are.
[PHONE CLICKS]
- Who's this guy?
- My dad.
He's in the military.
He's taken me to the
tree lighting every year.
But this year he can't, because
he's away leading training exercises.
While he's away, my mom and I
still find ways to include him.
So I promised him I'd
take lots of pictures.
Which is why I need my
phone and that tree back!
Please.
I really miss him.
Okay, I I'll give
you your phone back.
Just promise you won't tell
anyone about this place.
- Fine.
- [PHONE BEEPS]
All right, everything's deleted.
Just get her back to her mom without
letting her see the way out of here.
- Then you can give her her phone back.
- Okay. Don't worry.
She won't see a thing.
Now, cover your eyes, and no peeking!
Phew. That was close.
Back to crushing the Christmas spirit!
You okay?
Actually, Mom, I
I can't believe I'm saying this, but
I think we should return the tree.
[SCOFFS] Wow, that electric shock
must've really messed up your melon.
[GIGGLES] One more should fix it!
So after hearing exactly why Savannah
wanted them to return the tree they stole,
Havoc had a change of heart.
Surge, not so much.
What do you mean, we need
to take the tree back?
I was just thinking,
it must be a real bummer
for Savannah not have her
dad around on Christmas.
It kinda reminded me of when
Dad missed my 13th birthday
because he was on a "business trip."
Oh! [CHUCKLES]
When he battled Captain
Climate on that melting iceberg.
That was my seventh birthday.
Oh, then you must mean the time
that he defeated Lava Lantern
on the edge of the volcano.
That was my tenth. But thank you
for reminding me that
the least memorable thing
about my birthday is my actual birthday.
It was the year I got my superpower.
Oh.
I remember that day.
I was so excited. All I
wanted was for Dad to come home
so I could show him how
loud I could sonic scream.
You screamed so loud,
the ceiling caved in.
You were so proud.
And those people that
fell in from the street
were very impressed!
[SIGHS] You know, as villains,
I know we're supposed to take
whatever we want whenever we want,
but what if we're stealing
more than a tree here?
What if we're stealing a memory
a little girl won't get
to share with her dad?
- I call that a two-fer.
- Mom!
Fine! I I I
suppose I see your point.
Every kid deserves to have their
family around in these special moments.
Even kids that aren't evil. [CHUCKLES]
What about the challenge?
I mean, you really wanted to win.
All right! Savannah's gone.
Let's go show this tree to
Onyx and win this thing, huh?
Are we going or not?
♪♪
Man, when we win this raffle,
these people are gonna hate us!
We're villains. They already hate us.
You have to ruin everything?
Okay, time for the raffle!
Whose ticket will I pull?
Will it be yours, or will it be yours?
Only fate knows who will
win the amazing raffle
Get on with it! This
isn't a magic castle!
I mean, uh, fingers crossed!
And the winner is
[MAGNETIC WHOOSH]
Jack McWaxy!
[EXCLAIMING]
This is so unexpected!
I want to thank the city of Centropolis
and to all the little guys
who've never won anything!
This is for you! Now, get
the ho-ho out of my way.
Look at all these sad sacks!
They can't stand that I won!
Hey, let's all give it up for Jack.
At least someone's kid'll
be happy. [CHUCKLES]
We may have spent hours
trying to win that go-kart,
valuable hours that we could've
all spent with our families
during this special holiday time,
but good for him!
What are you talking about?
You're supposed to be angry!
I won the last go-kart.
Yeah, you bought,
like, a hundred tickets!
It was actually 250.
I gave blood just to
afford these tickets.
But it's Christmas,
the season of giving.
And seeing how happy
you were after you won
just makes my Christmas even better!
No!
Dad, what's going on? We
went through all that work
to get the go-karts,
even this last one,
and now they're saying we
made their Christmas better?
Well, I'm not sure, but I think
maybe this is what they mean
when they talk about Christmas spirit.
You're right. I mean, this whole time,
we've been trying to ruin Christmas,
when we should've been
trying to ruin their spirit.
But judging from this, I don't
know that that's possible.
Dad, are you starting to feel it, too?
The Christmas spirit?
I think so. I think maybe this holiday
is about more than stealing
gifts to ruin people's happiness.
Maybe by bringing joy to others,
it could make us happy, too.
Even if it is for just one day.
Ugh! I feel so dirty!
Does this mean you're gonna turn
into one of those crazy parents
who's willing to spend lots of
money and do whatever it takes
to win my love through gifts?
Son, I'm feeling the
spirit, I'm not an imbecile.
♪♪
What's wrong, Savannah?
Aren't you excited
for the tree lighting?
Not this year. Can we just go home?
Honey, I know this year is
tough with Dad being away.
But we agreed we wouldn't
let it ruin Christmas.
So grab your phone and get ready to
send him some good pictures of the tree.
[ALL] Five, four, three, two, one!
[ALL CHEERING]
But there's no way.
I'm glad you came around, Mom.
Hm? Well, how could I not?
That girl was so
persistent and annoying.
Kinda remind me of you.
That's strange. The tree didn't light.
Did you forget to connect the power?
I just carried a 30-foot
tree for five miles.
You couldn't handle the plug?
[SIGHS] The whole point
of us returning the tree
was so that Savannah could send
her dad pictures of it lit up.
Mom [SIGHS] Can't you do something?
[SIGHS] Fine.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[HAPPY CHATTER]
Ah. All right, now we've broken
every villain rule in the book,
I think we should go home.
This is the brightest
tree we've ever had.
Can't believe Dad isn't here to see it.
[JAMES] I wouldn't
miss this for the world.
Dad? Dad!
I can't believe you're home!
Wait, look.
I thought you couldn't make it!
That's what I thought, too.
But our Company Commander
gave us a 24-hour pass for the holiday.
Mm!
Well, looks like we won't be
winning Onyx's challenge this year.
[SCOFFS] That's okay.
I mean, Onyx also has the
Ruin New Year's Eve Challenge,
so maybe we can play human bowling
with the giant New Year's Eve ball?
Sounds good to me.
We can knock people into the gutters.
[CHRISTMAS MUSIC PLAYING]
Merry Christmas.
You, too.
♪♪
That was a pretty cool thing
we did, giving that tree back.
Yeah, it was.
I have a confession to make!
I know you probably haven't
noticed, but I really love Christmas,
and I don't care who knows it!
Just don't tell Dad. He'll freak.
[HORN HONKING]
Ho, ho, ho! Here ya go!
I gotta say, giving
away stolen merchandise
feels almost as good as stealing it.
Yeah, giving the go-karts to the people
from the raffle line made
me feel all warm and tingly!
That could be a rash from the elf suit.
Hey, maybe we should
do this all the time.
Nah, next year, I'm expecting
all these people to give us gifts.
I wrote our P.O. Box
number on all the packages.
So the only reason we're doing this
is so you'll get something in return?
Son, that's what Christmas is all about.
["DECK THE HALLS" PLAYING]
[HARTLEY] And our villain
family lived happily ever after.
Well, kind of. They're
a work in progress.
Happy Holidays, everyone!