Veronica Mars s01e21 Episode Script
A Trip to the Dentist
Previously on Veronica Mars: I need to report a crime.
Is there anyone in particular you'd like me to arrest or should I just round up the sons of the most important families in town? You know what this is? A bug.
I found it in that houseplant.
Do you know who delivered it? Your son.
- Fifty grand? Not bad.
- Money for nothing.
Might not be as easy as you think.
Duncan Kane? I think I'll be able to track him down.
I loved Lilly, and Lilly loved guys.
It's okay.
I don't have to feel guilty anymore.
Feel guilty about what? What are we doing? Who gave you the Rohypnol the night of Shelly Pomroy's party? It was Logan Echolls.
I know.
Of all the countries under military dictatorship in all the world Did they give you the jet to take me back home, or am I supposed to click my heels? It's a hell of a job you did with the fake passport, by the way.
- Do you think I killed Lilly? - I don't know who killed your sister.
I only know it wasn't Abel Koontz.
I know it wasn't me.
Randy just finished shaping it for me.
Double concave bottom, with the sweetest little rocker through the tail.
- And you dinged it your first time out? - What? Dude, so not laughing.
This is my child.
Okay, dude, the thought of you breeding Mazel tov.
Hey, Veronica.
Hey, will you stop for two seconds? See, when they run away like that, it's kind of a hint they're not interested.
You do not wanna start with me today, Paco.
Are you sure? It was in my day planner under "goals.
" - How's this your business? - I'm looking out for Veronica.
If you think you're gonna lay a hand on her the way you did Lilly Don't you even say her name.
Actually, she kind of liked it when I said her name.
You think she had any real interest in you? You're a pork rind.
You're what people grab when they're stoned and they want garbage.
What makes it worse? Thinking she had feelings for me or that she was using me for sex? - You stay away from Veronica.
- I'm not the one she's running away from.
Gentlemen.
Thanks.
What is it, buddy? Hey, what is it? I'm not leaving.
It's kind of a bad time.
Okay.
So I should come back when? Never? That work for you? What did I do, Veronica? Can you just tell me so that I can apologize or explain? Explain.
Okay.
Explain to me why you were the one with GHB the night of Shelly Pomroy's party when someone drugged and raped me.
Explanation? - Apology? - You were raped? Okay, don't.
Seriously.
- What happened to you? - You tell me.
Wait a second.
You think I was told that you were the one with the drugs.
I got some Liquid X in Tijuana with Luke and Sean.
We were gonna have some fun.
Fun, like "sex with unconscious people" fun? - Fun, like "go to a rave" fun.
- Oh, okay, you've convinced me.
- Bygones.
- What can I do? What can I do to make it better? I'm gonna find out who did this to me and make them pay, even if it was you.
Sorry.
I have to go throw up now.
As a rule, people that hate you aren't that helpful.
There were about 100 people at Shelly's party.
Ninety-eight of them would walk over my corpse for free gum.
My 09er resources are limited, but I do have a few people I can count on.
Can we skip English today? I have some sort of Hemingway-related narcolepsy.
We start talking about The Sun Also Rises, and I fall asleep.
Don't blame Papa.
Blame Mrs.
Murphy's monotone.
Hey, you were at Shelly Pomroy's end-of-the-year party, right? Yeah.
Yeah, for a little while.
- Did you see me there? - Why? I just wanna know.
My memory's a little fuzzy about that night.
- Yeah, maybe that's a good thing.
- So you did see me.
For, like, a second.
I was with Cole, and we were just leaving.
- I didn't even say goodbye to Shelly.
- You talk to her 50 times a day.
Come on.
Unless you wanna stick around for some body shots.
- Someone should help her.
- Let's go.
I'm not ending the night with Veronica puking in my car.
We can't leave her like that.
Look.
Someone's got her.
Hey, dude, you can't be the cavalry You don't know who helped me? No, so that's your big high school alcohol-related embarrassing moment.
Everyone's got one, right? You gotta let it go.
You'll make yourself crazy.
Watch your step, sir.
Mr.
Mars.
- Well done.
- Oh, well, thanks.
Well done.
Maybe your daughter has a future in travel planning.
And if she gets a discount, and I travel the world, I'll be sure to send you a postcard.
You can hang it in your cell.
Keith, thank you.
I don't know what we would've done.
I'm happy everything worked out.
You're anxious to get home, so stop by the office when it's convenient, we'll finish up.
- Finish up? - I'm referring to the reward.
You might want to speak to your daughter about that.
Veronica and I had an arrangement.
You just met her end of the bargain.
You have no idea what the past few weeks have been like.
Next time you run away, take your medication with you.
Empty stomach.
Remember when I saved you from drug dealers and I said I may call upon you for a favor someday? - You didn't say that.
- It was implied.
- Okay, what can I do you for? - Nice.
I heard you went to TJ with Sean and Logan and scored some GHB.
Wow, that was like a It was like a year ago.
I don't have any now.
I was gonna spike your juice box and have my way with you.
- What'd you do with it? - Nothing.
Honestly, I didn't do anything.
I gave it away.
Who'd you give it to? Dick Casablancas.
Look at that.
Beaver's getting all the love, and Dick's flapping out in the breeze.
Please.
You have the hottest girlfriend.
Like fake boobs: Great to look at, but they don't do as much as you'd like them to.
- Well, you get a couple drinks in her.
- She's on freaking Atkins.
- Did you guys get some stuff in TJ? - Well, I'm saving it for a special occasion.
This isn't it.
Who invited Veronica Mars? Why do you let this stuff get to you? Look at you.
You're all tense.
Can you not be all over me for five seconds? All right.
So Dick drugged Madison? Well, he asked for two doses, so I figured he was gonna take one and ask her to take the other one, but I'm pretty sure she didn't.
- How do you know that? - You're not gonna like this part.
Stupid, stringy-haired white trash.
As I understand it, GHB is supposed to make you nicer.
- Why would Madison do that? - I don't know.
Because she's a horrible human being? You can keep asking, but you're not the fairest.
Trust me.
Well, I can tell you who the pastiest is.
What's the deal? Can't buy bronzer with food stamps? You wrote "slut" on my car last year at Shelly's party.
Why? Because "whore" had too many letters.
I have never done anything to you, up till now.
- Whatever, Veronica.
- Oh, like what? How about making out with my boyfriend in front of an entire party? I shouldn't take that personally, though.
- You pretty much made out with everyone.
- I don't believe you.
Are you kidding? Hey, what's up, Dick? How's it going? - You have the best hair.
- You like that, huh? - Come on, that's not cool.
- You think that's cool, don't you, Case? - I made out with Dick and Casey? - Please.
You made out with the garage door.
And don't even start with the "I was so wasted.
" I wasn't drunk.
I was drugged.
Someone put GHB in my drink.
Yeah.
She could have gotten me fired, Keith.
- How is that not a big deal? - I didn't say it wasn't.
She put a listening device in a plant, had my son deliver it to my place of business.
- And she has her reasons.
- Her reasons? - She's 17.
- She's not your average 17-year-old.
How can she be when you treat her like she's 40? Mrs.
Fennel, I'm so sorry, but Clarence Wiedman knew that I was - Just let me explain.
- No, you give us a minute.
- If I can just explain - Go to your room now! Fine.
But he bugged me first.
He bugged her first? Duncan's okay.
He's back home.
His parents are gonna keep him home a couple days, let him rest.
- I'm so sorry, Dad.
- Stop.
It's okay.
It's my fault.
I'm the one who gave Wallace the bugged plant.
Veronica, did you make some kind of deal with Celeste Kane that I don't know about? I told her I'd look for Duncan if she released Weevil.
Well, she said she wouldn't pay the reward.
She said that we're even now.
It's ridiculous, of course.
They'll pay.
She's just enjoying the moment.
- She's a witch.
- What if you started looking for another job? - Selling clothes or something.
- What? I just can't help think that your life would be better if you weren't working for me.
Are you kidding me? You're the best father in the world.
I mean, come on.
Look at me.
I'm healthy, happy, good grades, all my own teeth.
Fancy shoes.
I never would have gotten through this year if it wasn't for you.
If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have to.
Hey, stranger.
- What's up, Veronica? - Kind of an awkward question.
Do you remember Shelly's end-of-the-year party? - I know it was a while ago.
- Not really.
I gotta get stuff done before class.
See you around.
Oh, yeah.
I was just wondering how you've been, you know, without your grandmother.
I've been good.
Got my priorities in check.
No more throwing my family's money at strangers so I can eat S'mores and listen to bad folk music.
- What's the awkward question? - Did I hit on you at Shelly's party? - Did it get ugly at Shelly's? - Oh, yeah.
You like grabbing hair, huh? That's nice.
Why don't you go see Uncle Casey? Oh, no, thanks.
I like mine to be able to stand on their own power.
- Well, I'm gonna go drink some bleach now.
- Just a thought.
If you don't remember much about that party, you should leave it that way.
Can I guess that means you saw something else? I have to go home.
You are home.
See, there's your pool and your hot tub and your big mansion and here's the hot foreign-exchange student living with your family.
Now, you know you've had your eye on her, and that's okay.
It's perfectly natural.
The guys thought it would be cool to see you make out with Shelly.
They were feeding me shots? Guess they were afraid you were sobering up.
This is why I need to keep my walkie-talkies in my car.
Muck.
Really? The dirt? See, I find I hardly need my walkie-talkies at school at all, but that's me.
Wallace, I'm so sorry I had you bug Kane Software.
I thought no one would find out.
If I knew your mom would get in trouble Stop.
I'm not stupid.
I knew I wasn't just delivering a plant.
I could have said no.
You know, I do these things for you, and I never ask you why.
I know.
You know why? Because I know you would never tell me.
I'd do the same for you.
Logan Echolls used one of the absence slips I took for you.
- You checked the absence slips? - You, I do favors for.
My friends, I put my butt on the line for.
That guy doesn't even know my name.
Tell me why I'm helping him.
- You're not.
- You sure about that? I needed him for something with his mother's case.
It was just loose ends and stuff.
That's it.
Thanks.
Now that I have all the details, I don't feel like such a chump.
I'll get the answers, then.
What? I'm just thinking of all the ways I can destroy you.
Well, you sitting there grinning is kind of torturous.
Shelly and I were thinking of getting together later for a little girl-on-girl.
You wanna come with? Wow.
When you're about to soil yourself, you get a little twitch in your eye.
- I have no idea what you're talking about.
- Sure you do.
Unless you want me to tell one of my favorite local deputies that you were the one with GHB that night - I know you were feeding me drinks.
- I wasn't feeding you drinks.
It was Dick.
He's the one that you should be talking to.
Dick.
- What? - You're gonna hurt her or something, man.
Oh, I'd hurt her.
- You, she might not even notice.
- This is so not even funny.
- What's the problem? - What, like, you're serious? Get me to do something stupid so that you can laugh? She's actually kind of hot, when she's quiet.
Perfectly cute piece of ass, ready and willing.
She's not willing, Dick.
She's unconscious.
That's the best you're gonna do, bro.
- You're not real big with the sober chicks.
- Just go, all right? That's my boy.
Make sure you suit up.
You don't know where she's been.
Your issue's with Dick and Beaver, not me.
They were horrible to you.
Well, I'm just sorry you had to witness it.
That must've been awful for you.
Hiya, Dick.
How's it going? - What the hell are you doing? - Trying to get your attention.
- Got a couple questions for you.
- You're freaking nuts, you know that? Insulting me right now seems like a good plan how? - What do you want? - Answers, and quickly.
Did you give me GHB the night of Shelly's party? No.
I'm not even the one who had it.
I mean, I got some but I didn't give any to you.
I swear on my life.
When you say that, it makes me hope you're lying.
You brought me into the guest bedroom for Beaver.
More like I found you in the guest bedroom.
Beaver, don't go.
You said you were gonna stay here with me.
Yeah, I'm here.
I'm staying, Veronica.
I'm here.
Why don't you come back here.
It's an awfully big bed.
Are you freaking kidding me? - How about reality, Dick? - What? I'm just telling you what I saw.
I didn't drug you.
Don't go blaming me because you got all wasted and slutty.
Beaver.
Damn, you don't look happy to see me.
- How's it going, Veronica? - Really well! I just found out that my dream where I was locked all alone in a bedroom with you was reality.
- Care to share some details, lover? - Nothing happened.
Actually, something did happen.
I might not remember the details, but I sure as hell remember the morning after.
Look, I swear to God, I didn't touch you, Veronica.
Okay, I mean, Dick, he was all on me to, and there was this girl this freshman.
Her name's Cindy, and she's kind of Well, she's easy, you know, and me and her, we were supposed to I don't know.
Dicky set something up, okay and then she was all over Logan, and then she left early with him.
Yeah.
Sucks to be you.
And? And then Dicky brought me into the guest room with you.
I just wanted him to leave me alone.
- You need me to get you started? - I can draw you a diagram.
No, it's cool.
It's just Just go, all right? I got it.
That's my boy.
Just make sure you suit up.
You don't know where she's been.
Veronica, you okay? That was my big night.
I don't know.
I'm supposed to lose my virginity.
Instead I hurl on Carrie Bishop's shoes.
Nothing happened.
Really, I mean, I swear on my life that the last time that I saw you you were passed out on that bed.
Well, hey, thanks for leaving me there.
The whole ritual cleaning thing is textbook for a reason.
For a couple of minutes, you're in control and everything's the way it should be, at least on the surface.
You see another special on dust mites? They're disgusting, everywhere, and they must be destroyed.
- Do I have messages, or did you boil them? - Just a fax.
Apparently, that package you've been waiting for is in Vegas.
Is it a white Bengal tiger? Yeah, it's the entertainment lawyer I've been tracking for the past year.
My source in Vegas spotted him.
I'll have to leave as soon as possible.
Maybe you wanna stay with a friend or something.
Miss an opportunity to have the apartment so that I can raid the liquor cabinet and watch Skinemax? No, wait.
I'm a girl.
I'm gonna do my homework, secure all the locks brush, floss and curl into bed with an overly protective pit bull.
You don't have to worry about me.
Especially for you tonight, I am making what will be known from now on as Aaron's Extra-Special Crab Cakes.
I'm sure I'll thoroughly enjoy them, right up until my esophagus closes up cuts off my air supply, and I shuffle off this mortal coil.
Perhaps my last words will be, "Great crab, Papa.
" I'm allergic to shellfish.
- Of course.
I forgot.
- You didn't forget.
You never knew.
I did.
I just got you confused with Trina, that's all.
I'm the one allergic to shellfish.
Trina's the one allergic to work.
You know somehow, you've got it in your head that I don't know a thing about you.
Well, I got news for you.
I'm your father.
I raised you.
I know plenty.
Well, then round one of How Well Do You Know Your Son? When is my birthday? - February.
- Wow.
Well, you got a vowel right.
I have been pretty tolerant of your wiseass remarks, but you are pushing it.
Does it matter that I'm trying? I mean, does that count for anything at all? Yeah.
You're accumulating points.
You've almost won the wet vac.
I'm committed to this family, Logan.
I'm committed to you.
You'll see that.
Well, you've got limited time, because let's face it my 18th birthday, whenever that is Mom's inheritance comes through, and it's bon voyage.
- What can I get for you? - I'll have a hot chocolate, creme brulée and some answers, if you can give me about two minutes.
I'm kind of in the weeds.
Here's the thing.
Do you remember Shelly's party last year? - Yeah.
- I don't.
At least not between passing out in the back yard and waking up the next morning in the guest room.
- I think you probably saw me.
- I saw you.
Oh, God, shut the door next time.
Welcome back.
So Carrie Bishop said that you and I were in bed together the night of Shelly Pomroy's party last year.
- Care to elaborate? - What? - What are you talking about? - I wanna know what happened.
Do you know how wasted I was at Shelly's party? I barely even remember it.
That's kind of a thing with you, huh? Carrie said she walked into the guest room and you were naked and on top of me.
- I can't believe this.
- You were the one that raped me.
- I raped you? So I'm a murderer and a rapist now.
What are you doing? Why are you acting like this? Why are you acting like you weren't there? - What? - You were there too, you know.
I thought we had some unspoken rule like we're never gonna talk about it, but now I raped you.
You're here.
Hi, baby.
I miss you.
You don't remember.
- It's kind of a bad feeling, huh? - Why did you leave me there? If it was so tender and loving, why did I wake up by myself searching for my underwear? - I had to get out.
- You had to? - Yes.
I woke up.
I saw you there.
- I realized what I did.
- What did you realize was so bad? - I slept with you! - But it was consensual, right? - Then what about that is so wrong? - Because you're my sister! And I knew it! After my mother told me, I tried to cut you out of my life! I loved you! I tried not to! I tried not to, but it won't go away! I was about to call the police on you, stalker.
This is so not an "I told you so," but do you see why I kind of keep things to myself? I think I can go home now.
- Maybe you should just stay here.
- No, I feel better.
- Of course, you feel worse.
- No, I don't care about me.
I just wish I could do something or say something.
- You don't have to say anything.
That's kind of the good part.
You say I never tell you anything when I ask for favors? Yeah.
You so don't need to worry about that right now.
I'm not worried.
Here's everything there is to know.
Don't tell me Wallace still has you cutting his crusts off.
- How are you, Veronica? - Sorry.
I'm really hoping you won't hold my dad responsible for my boneheadedness.
He's the best guy ever.
You see that, right? You guys are really good together.
I know.
You make him so happy.
I'm afraid I didn't make him too happy before he left for Vegas.
- I think I might have ruined things.
- Trust me.
I know how he feels about you.
He's not going anywhere.
- Hello? Who am I talking to? - Hi.
Is this Cheyenne? - You know it, baby.
- I'd like to set up an appointment.
I'm so sorry.
I know now it wasn't you, and I'm sorry I accused you.
- It's fine.
Are you okay? - It's not fine.
I'm really sorry.
Veronica all I care about is you.
Okay? - Did you find something out? - Yeah.
Do you wanna tell me about it? I mean, you don't have to tell me.
I'm just here for whatever you need, okay? - I was drugged, but I wasn't - Okay.
I was with Duncan.
Apparently, we ended up in the guest room together and he was wasted and I was out of it and I guess our feelings and nature I'm sorry.
I'm just glad you're here.
- Well, hello to you.
- Come in, please.
So can I get you anything to drink? Are you hungry or anything? I think not having to buy me dinner first is kind of the point.
Why don't you come sit over here with me and relax, okay? Or maybe we could go sit out on the balcony.
You're still gonna be married on the balcony.
Now I want you to tell me exactly what you want.
That one thing you can never get the little woman to do.
And we'll start there.
Actually I'd like to start by talking about Abel Koontz.
Miss Collins, my name is Keith Mars.
I'm a private investigator from California.
I've been looking for you for a year.
I know you were with Abel Koontz at the time he supposedly murdered Lilly Kane.
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- You do.
There's a phone record, Cheyenne.
Abel called the same number at the same time every week.
It was a standing appointment.
By the time I traced that number to you, you'd moved on to Seattle, San Francisco, Aspen.
And I bet I know why.
I packed up my whole life to get away from this, and you have to find me? - An innocent man's life is at stake.
- He confessed! For whatever reason.
If I come forward, I'll be the most famous working girl on the planet.
I have a 5-year-old son who thinks I'm a stewardess.
A girl was murdered.
Don't you think the person who killed her should be the one in jail? Dad thinks he's a gourmet.
Humor him.
Oh, so now he's gonna make us eat to candlelight tonight.
Okay, showtime.
Surprise! So is this party nine months early or three months late? I got a lot of lost years I gotta make up for.
- This is my way of getting started.
- It's a good call.
Dude, what the hell are you doing? Please tell me this is, like, some new reality show called My Skank.
Goodbye, Dick.
- What? - Get out of my house.
You have a problem with Veronica, you leave.
You have a problem with Veronica, you're dead to me so just, like, evaporate or something.
I don't know.
That's kind of a general invitation.
If you don't like my girlfriend then just start heading toward the rectangle with the knob.
Are you okay? Look, Duncan, listen, I wanna - So you're, like, dating Logan now? - Yes, Madison.
Do you think his dad's gonna do another movie soon, or what? He is way too cute to become a has-been.
You want one? They said it was sugar-free, but I don't know.
You don't wanna drink that.
Why? I'm betting Madison gave you a trip to the dentist.
It's her thing.
She does it to people she doesn't like.
She spits in their cocktail and calls it a "Trip to the Dentist" because we're in eighth grade.
What are you doing? Did you give me a Trip to the Dentist the night of Shelly's party? Hello? I have no idea what you're talking about.
Did you spit in your drink and give it to me? Like I was the only person's spit you had in your mouth that night? Regular soda? Why didn't you just fill the cup with lard? - You have no idea what you did to me.
- Oh, my God.
I spit in your drink.
You are, like, so scarred for life.
Duncan! Duncan, what are you doing? Stop that! This is about Veronica, isn't it? You're still in love with her, right? Answer me! Thanks for coming, guys.
I hope you got something to eat.
Now, see, why can't we just be like this? Why do there have to be all those other people in this world? What are you doing? You're too short.
We need to level the playing field.
- Is this where you take all your conquests? - Nope.
Only the short ones.
Hey, I have to tell you something.
I'm sorry.
We're past the confessional portion of this program.
- We're onto the make-out.
- Veronica, stop.
I gotta I have to tell you something about Shelly's party.
There you go.
Go for it.
There you go, sweet piece.
I know about the salt lick.
I'm gonna choose to think of it as one of those "not real" things.
There's more.
What the hell are you doing? She can barely sit up, you freaks! Wait, dude, you can't be the cavalry and a martyr, man.
Pick a side.
Leave her alone.
Hey, I'm sorry, dude.
No, man, I mean, you're totally right.
It's no way to have fun, huh? Cheers.
I just wanted Duncan to have some fun.
- He barely even smiled since Lilly - You didn't know what would happen.
I'm the one who's responsible for what happened to you.
And I can't take that I hurt you like that.
I can't take that I hurt you when all I wanna do is protect you.
I want you to trust me.
I do.
Okay.
I don't know about you, but I could use a refreshment about now.
- You learned that from Lilly.
- No, Lilly learned that from me.
It's almost endearing that I need a key to the liquor cabinet, don't you think? Wow.
Swell, huh? I'll be right back.
Two minutes.
Okay.
- You okay? - Thanks for coming to get me.
Honey, I'm home.
So am I, honey.
So am I.
Is there anyone in particular you'd like me to arrest or should I just round up the sons of the most important families in town? You know what this is? A bug.
I found it in that houseplant.
Do you know who delivered it? Your son.
- Fifty grand? Not bad.
- Money for nothing.
Might not be as easy as you think.
Duncan Kane? I think I'll be able to track him down.
I loved Lilly, and Lilly loved guys.
It's okay.
I don't have to feel guilty anymore.
Feel guilty about what? What are we doing? Who gave you the Rohypnol the night of Shelly Pomroy's party? It was Logan Echolls.
I know.
Of all the countries under military dictatorship in all the world Did they give you the jet to take me back home, or am I supposed to click my heels? It's a hell of a job you did with the fake passport, by the way.
- Do you think I killed Lilly? - I don't know who killed your sister.
I only know it wasn't Abel Koontz.
I know it wasn't me.
Randy just finished shaping it for me.
Double concave bottom, with the sweetest little rocker through the tail.
- And you dinged it your first time out? - What? Dude, so not laughing.
This is my child.
Okay, dude, the thought of you breeding Mazel tov.
Hey, Veronica.
Hey, will you stop for two seconds? See, when they run away like that, it's kind of a hint they're not interested.
You do not wanna start with me today, Paco.
Are you sure? It was in my day planner under "goals.
" - How's this your business? - I'm looking out for Veronica.
If you think you're gonna lay a hand on her the way you did Lilly Don't you even say her name.
Actually, she kind of liked it when I said her name.
You think she had any real interest in you? You're a pork rind.
You're what people grab when they're stoned and they want garbage.
What makes it worse? Thinking she had feelings for me or that she was using me for sex? - You stay away from Veronica.
- I'm not the one she's running away from.
Gentlemen.
Thanks.
What is it, buddy? Hey, what is it? I'm not leaving.
It's kind of a bad time.
Okay.
So I should come back when? Never? That work for you? What did I do, Veronica? Can you just tell me so that I can apologize or explain? Explain.
Okay.
Explain to me why you were the one with GHB the night of Shelly Pomroy's party when someone drugged and raped me.
Explanation? - Apology? - You were raped? Okay, don't.
Seriously.
- What happened to you? - You tell me.
Wait a second.
You think I was told that you were the one with the drugs.
I got some Liquid X in Tijuana with Luke and Sean.
We were gonna have some fun.
Fun, like "sex with unconscious people" fun? - Fun, like "go to a rave" fun.
- Oh, okay, you've convinced me.
- Bygones.
- What can I do? What can I do to make it better? I'm gonna find out who did this to me and make them pay, even if it was you.
Sorry.
I have to go throw up now.
As a rule, people that hate you aren't that helpful.
There were about 100 people at Shelly's party.
Ninety-eight of them would walk over my corpse for free gum.
My 09er resources are limited, but I do have a few people I can count on.
Can we skip English today? I have some sort of Hemingway-related narcolepsy.
We start talking about The Sun Also Rises, and I fall asleep.
Don't blame Papa.
Blame Mrs.
Murphy's monotone.
Hey, you were at Shelly Pomroy's end-of-the-year party, right? Yeah.
Yeah, for a little while.
- Did you see me there? - Why? I just wanna know.
My memory's a little fuzzy about that night.
- Yeah, maybe that's a good thing.
- So you did see me.
For, like, a second.
I was with Cole, and we were just leaving.
- I didn't even say goodbye to Shelly.
- You talk to her 50 times a day.
Come on.
Unless you wanna stick around for some body shots.
- Someone should help her.
- Let's go.
I'm not ending the night with Veronica puking in my car.
We can't leave her like that.
Look.
Someone's got her.
Hey, dude, you can't be the cavalry You don't know who helped me? No, so that's your big high school alcohol-related embarrassing moment.
Everyone's got one, right? You gotta let it go.
You'll make yourself crazy.
Watch your step, sir.
Mr.
Mars.
- Well done.
- Oh, well, thanks.
Well done.
Maybe your daughter has a future in travel planning.
And if she gets a discount, and I travel the world, I'll be sure to send you a postcard.
You can hang it in your cell.
Keith, thank you.
I don't know what we would've done.
I'm happy everything worked out.
You're anxious to get home, so stop by the office when it's convenient, we'll finish up.
- Finish up? - I'm referring to the reward.
You might want to speak to your daughter about that.
Veronica and I had an arrangement.
You just met her end of the bargain.
You have no idea what the past few weeks have been like.
Next time you run away, take your medication with you.
Empty stomach.
Remember when I saved you from drug dealers and I said I may call upon you for a favor someday? - You didn't say that.
- It was implied.
- Okay, what can I do you for? - Nice.
I heard you went to TJ with Sean and Logan and scored some GHB.
Wow, that was like a It was like a year ago.
I don't have any now.
I was gonna spike your juice box and have my way with you.
- What'd you do with it? - Nothing.
Honestly, I didn't do anything.
I gave it away.
Who'd you give it to? Dick Casablancas.
Look at that.
Beaver's getting all the love, and Dick's flapping out in the breeze.
Please.
You have the hottest girlfriend.
Like fake boobs: Great to look at, but they don't do as much as you'd like them to.
- Well, you get a couple drinks in her.
- She's on freaking Atkins.
- Did you guys get some stuff in TJ? - Well, I'm saving it for a special occasion.
This isn't it.
Who invited Veronica Mars? Why do you let this stuff get to you? Look at you.
You're all tense.
Can you not be all over me for five seconds? All right.
So Dick drugged Madison? Well, he asked for two doses, so I figured he was gonna take one and ask her to take the other one, but I'm pretty sure she didn't.
- How do you know that? - You're not gonna like this part.
Stupid, stringy-haired white trash.
As I understand it, GHB is supposed to make you nicer.
- Why would Madison do that? - I don't know.
Because she's a horrible human being? You can keep asking, but you're not the fairest.
Trust me.
Well, I can tell you who the pastiest is.
What's the deal? Can't buy bronzer with food stamps? You wrote "slut" on my car last year at Shelly's party.
Why? Because "whore" had too many letters.
I have never done anything to you, up till now.
- Whatever, Veronica.
- Oh, like what? How about making out with my boyfriend in front of an entire party? I shouldn't take that personally, though.
- You pretty much made out with everyone.
- I don't believe you.
Are you kidding? Hey, what's up, Dick? How's it going? - You have the best hair.
- You like that, huh? - Come on, that's not cool.
- You think that's cool, don't you, Case? - I made out with Dick and Casey? - Please.
You made out with the garage door.
And don't even start with the "I was so wasted.
" I wasn't drunk.
I was drugged.
Someone put GHB in my drink.
Yeah.
She could have gotten me fired, Keith.
- How is that not a big deal? - I didn't say it wasn't.
She put a listening device in a plant, had my son deliver it to my place of business.
- And she has her reasons.
- Her reasons? - She's 17.
- She's not your average 17-year-old.
How can she be when you treat her like she's 40? Mrs.
Fennel, I'm so sorry, but Clarence Wiedman knew that I was - Just let me explain.
- No, you give us a minute.
- If I can just explain - Go to your room now! Fine.
But he bugged me first.
He bugged her first? Duncan's okay.
He's back home.
His parents are gonna keep him home a couple days, let him rest.
- I'm so sorry, Dad.
- Stop.
It's okay.
It's my fault.
I'm the one who gave Wallace the bugged plant.
Veronica, did you make some kind of deal with Celeste Kane that I don't know about? I told her I'd look for Duncan if she released Weevil.
Well, she said she wouldn't pay the reward.
She said that we're even now.
It's ridiculous, of course.
They'll pay.
She's just enjoying the moment.
- She's a witch.
- What if you started looking for another job? - Selling clothes or something.
- What? I just can't help think that your life would be better if you weren't working for me.
Are you kidding me? You're the best father in the world.
I mean, come on.
Look at me.
I'm healthy, happy, good grades, all my own teeth.
Fancy shoes.
I never would have gotten through this year if it wasn't for you.
If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have to.
Hey, stranger.
- What's up, Veronica? - Kind of an awkward question.
Do you remember Shelly's end-of-the-year party? - I know it was a while ago.
- Not really.
I gotta get stuff done before class.
See you around.
Oh, yeah.
I was just wondering how you've been, you know, without your grandmother.
I've been good.
Got my priorities in check.
No more throwing my family's money at strangers so I can eat S'mores and listen to bad folk music.
- What's the awkward question? - Did I hit on you at Shelly's party? - Did it get ugly at Shelly's? - Oh, yeah.
You like grabbing hair, huh? That's nice.
Why don't you go see Uncle Casey? Oh, no, thanks.
I like mine to be able to stand on their own power.
- Well, I'm gonna go drink some bleach now.
- Just a thought.
If you don't remember much about that party, you should leave it that way.
Can I guess that means you saw something else? I have to go home.
You are home.
See, there's your pool and your hot tub and your big mansion and here's the hot foreign-exchange student living with your family.
Now, you know you've had your eye on her, and that's okay.
It's perfectly natural.
The guys thought it would be cool to see you make out with Shelly.
They were feeding me shots? Guess they were afraid you were sobering up.
This is why I need to keep my walkie-talkies in my car.
Muck.
Really? The dirt? See, I find I hardly need my walkie-talkies at school at all, but that's me.
Wallace, I'm so sorry I had you bug Kane Software.
I thought no one would find out.
If I knew your mom would get in trouble Stop.
I'm not stupid.
I knew I wasn't just delivering a plant.
I could have said no.
You know, I do these things for you, and I never ask you why.
I know.
You know why? Because I know you would never tell me.
I'd do the same for you.
Logan Echolls used one of the absence slips I took for you.
- You checked the absence slips? - You, I do favors for.
My friends, I put my butt on the line for.
That guy doesn't even know my name.
Tell me why I'm helping him.
- You're not.
- You sure about that? I needed him for something with his mother's case.
It was just loose ends and stuff.
That's it.
Thanks.
Now that I have all the details, I don't feel like such a chump.
I'll get the answers, then.
What? I'm just thinking of all the ways I can destroy you.
Well, you sitting there grinning is kind of torturous.
Shelly and I were thinking of getting together later for a little girl-on-girl.
You wanna come with? Wow.
When you're about to soil yourself, you get a little twitch in your eye.
- I have no idea what you're talking about.
- Sure you do.
Unless you want me to tell one of my favorite local deputies that you were the one with GHB that night - I know you were feeding me drinks.
- I wasn't feeding you drinks.
It was Dick.
He's the one that you should be talking to.
Dick.
- What? - You're gonna hurt her or something, man.
Oh, I'd hurt her.
- You, she might not even notice.
- This is so not even funny.
- What's the problem? - What, like, you're serious? Get me to do something stupid so that you can laugh? She's actually kind of hot, when she's quiet.
Perfectly cute piece of ass, ready and willing.
She's not willing, Dick.
She's unconscious.
That's the best you're gonna do, bro.
- You're not real big with the sober chicks.
- Just go, all right? That's my boy.
Make sure you suit up.
You don't know where she's been.
Your issue's with Dick and Beaver, not me.
They were horrible to you.
Well, I'm just sorry you had to witness it.
That must've been awful for you.
Hiya, Dick.
How's it going? - What the hell are you doing? - Trying to get your attention.
- Got a couple questions for you.
- You're freaking nuts, you know that? Insulting me right now seems like a good plan how? - What do you want? - Answers, and quickly.
Did you give me GHB the night of Shelly's party? No.
I'm not even the one who had it.
I mean, I got some but I didn't give any to you.
I swear on my life.
When you say that, it makes me hope you're lying.
You brought me into the guest bedroom for Beaver.
More like I found you in the guest bedroom.
Beaver, don't go.
You said you were gonna stay here with me.
Yeah, I'm here.
I'm staying, Veronica.
I'm here.
Why don't you come back here.
It's an awfully big bed.
Are you freaking kidding me? - How about reality, Dick? - What? I'm just telling you what I saw.
I didn't drug you.
Don't go blaming me because you got all wasted and slutty.
Beaver.
Damn, you don't look happy to see me.
- How's it going, Veronica? - Really well! I just found out that my dream where I was locked all alone in a bedroom with you was reality.
- Care to share some details, lover? - Nothing happened.
Actually, something did happen.
I might not remember the details, but I sure as hell remember the morning after.
Look, I swear to God, I didn't touch you, Veronica.
Okay, I mean, Dick, he was all on me to, and there was this girl this freshman.
Her name's Cindy, and she's kind of Well, she's easy, you know, and me and her, we were supposed to I don't know.
Dicky set something up, okay and then she was all over Logan, and then she left early with him.
Yeah.
Sucks to be you.
And? And then Dicky brought me into the guest room with you.
I just wanted him to leave me alone.
- You need me to get you started? - I can draw you a diagram.
No, it's cool.
It's just Just go, all right? I got it.
That's my boy.
Just make sure you suit up.
You don't know where she's been.
Veronica, you okay? That was my big night.
I don't know.
I'm supposed to lose my virginity.
Instead I hurl on Carrie Bishop's shoes.
Nothing happened.
Really, I mean, I swear on my life that the last time that I saw you you were passed out on that bed.
Well, hey, thanks for leaving me there.
The whole ritual cleaning thing is textbook for a reason.
For a couple of minutes, you're in control and everything's the way it should be, at least on the surface.
You see another special on dust mites? They're disgusting, everywhere, and they must be destroyed.
- Do I have messages, or did you boil them? - Just a fax.
Apparently, that package you've been waiting for is in Vegas.
Is it a white Bengal tiger? Yeah, it's the entertainment lawyer I've been tracking for the past year.
My source in Vegas spotted him.
I'll have to leave as soon as possible.
Maybe you wanna stay with a friend or something.
Miss an opportunity to have the apartment so that I can raid the liquor cabinet and watch Skinemax? No, wait.
I'm a girl.
I'm gonna do my homework, secure all the locks brush, floss and curl into bed with an overly protective pit bull.
You don't have to worry about me.
Especially for you tonight, I am making what will be known from now on as Aaron's Extra-Special Crab Cakes.
I'm sure I'll thoroughly enjoy them, right up until my esophagus closes up cuts off my air supply, and I shuffle off this mortal coil.
Perhaps my last words will be, "Great crab, Papa.
" I'm allergic to shellfish.
- Of course.
I forgot.
- You didn't forget.
You never knew.
I did.
I just got you confused with Trina, that's all.
I'm the one allergic to shellfish.
Trina's the one allergic to work.
You know somehow, you've got it in your head that I don't know a thing about you.
Well, I got news for you.
I'm your father.
I raised you.
I know plenty.
Well, then round one of How Well Do You Know Your Son? When is my birthday? - February.
- Wow.
Well, you got a vowel right.
I have been pretty tolerant of your wiseass remarks, but you are pushing it.
Does it matter that I'm trying? I mean, does that count for anything at all? Yeah.
You're accumulating points.
You've almost won the wet vac.
I'm committed to this family, Logan.
I'm committed to you.
You'll see that.
Well, you've got limited time, because let's face it my 18th birthday, whenever that is Mom's inheritance comes through, and it's bon voyage.
- What can I get for you? - I'll have a hot chocolate, creme brulée and some answers, if you can give me about two minutes.
I'm kind of in the weeds.
Here's the thing.
Do you remember Shelly's party last year? - Yeah.
- I don't.
At least not between passing out in the back yard and waking up the next morning in the guest room.
- I think you probably saw me.
- I saw you.
Oh, God, shut the door next time.
Welcome back.
So Carrie Bishop said that you and I were in bed together the night of Shelly Pomroy's party last year.
- Care to elaborate? - What? - What are you talking about? - I wanna know what happened.
Do you know how wasted I was at Shelly's party? I barely even remember it.
That's kind of a thing with you, huh? Carrie said she walked into the guest room and you were naked and on top of me.
- I can't believe this.
- You were the one that raped me.
- I raped you? So I'm a murderer and a rapist now.
What are you doing? Why are you acting like this? Why are you acting like you weren't there? - What? - You were there too, you know.
I thought we had some unspoken rule like we're never gonna talk about it, but now I raped you.
You're here.
Hi, baby.
I miss you.
You don't remember.
- It's kind of a bad feeling, huh? - Why did you leave me there? If it was so tender and loving, why did I wake up by myself searching for my underwear? - I had to get out.
- You had to? - Yes.
I woke up.
I saw you there.
- I realized what I did.
- What did you realize was so bad? - I slept with you! - But it was consensual, right? - Then what about that is so wrong? - Because you're my sister! And I knew it! After my mother told me, I tried to cut you out of my life! I loved you! I tried not to! I tried not to, but it won't go away! I was about to call the police on you, stalker.
This is so not an "I told you so," but do you see why I kind of keep things to myself? I think I can go home now.
- Maybe you should just stay here.
- No, I feel better.
- Of course, you feel worse.
- No, I don't care about me.
I just wish I could do something or say something.
- You don't have to say anything.
That's kind of the good part.
You say I never tell you anything when I ask for favors? Yeah.
You so don't need to worry about that right now.
I'm not worried.
Here's everything there is to know.
Don't tell me Wallace still has you cutting his crusts off.
- How are you, Veronica? - Sorry.
I'm really hoping you won't hold my dad responsible for my boneheadedness.
He's the best guy ever.
You see that, right? You guys are really good together.
I know.
You make him so happy.
I'm afraid I didn't make him too happy before he left for Vegas.
- I think I might have ruined things.
- Trust me.
I know how he feels about you.
He's not going anywhere.
- Hello? Who am I talking to? - Hi.
Is this Cheyenne? - You know it, baby.
- I'd like to set up an appointment.
I'm so sorry.
I know now it wasn't you, and I'm sorry I accused you.
- It's fine.
Are you okay? - It's not fine.
I'm really sorry.
Veronica all I care about is you.
Okay? - Did you find something out? - Yeah.
Do you wanna tell me about it? I mean, you don't have to tell me.
I'm just here for whatever you need, okay? - I was drugged, but I wasn't - Okay.
I was with Duncan.
Apparently, we ended up in the guest room together and he was wasted and I was out of it and I guess our feelings and nature I'm sorry.
I'm just glad you're here.
- Well, hello to you.
- Come in, please.
So can I get you anything to drink? Are you hungry or anything? I think not having to buy me dinner first is kind of the point.
Why don't you come sit over here with me and relax, okay? Or maybe we could go sit out on the balcony.
You're still gonna be married on the balcony.
Now I want you to tell me exactly what you want.
That one thing you can never get the little woman to do.
And we'll start there.
Actually I'd like to start by talking about Abel Koontz.
Miss Collins, my name is Keith Mars.
I'm a private investigator from California.
I've been looking for you for a year.
I know you were with Abel Koontz at the time he supposedly murdered Lilly Kane.
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- You do.
There's a phone record, Cheyenne.
Abel called the same number at the same time every week.
It was a standing appointment.
By the time I traced that number to you, you'd moved on to Seattle, San Francisco, Aspen.
And I bet I know why.
I packed up my whole life to get away from this, and you have to find me? - An innocent man's life is at stake.
- He confessed! For whatever reason.
If I come forward, I'll be the most famous working girl on the planet.
I have a 5-year-old son who thinks I'm a stewardess.
A girl was murdered.
Don't you think the person who killed her should be the one in jail? Dad thinks he's a gourmet.
Humor him.
Oh, so now he's gonna make us eat to candlelight tonight.
Okay, showtime.
Surprise! So is this party nine months early or three months late? I got a lot of lost years I gotta make up for.
- This is my way of getting started.
- It's a good call.
Dude, what the hell are you doing? Please tell me this is, like, some new reality show called My Skank.
Goodbye, Dick.
- What? - Get out of my house.
You have a problem with Veronica, you leave.
You have a problem with Veronica, you're dead to me so just, like, evaporate or something.
I don't know.
That's kind of a general invitation.
If you don't like my girlfriend then just start heading toward the rectangle with the knob.
Are you okay? Look, Duncan, listen, I wanna - So you're, like, dating Logan now? - Yes, Madison.
Do you think his dad's gonna do another movie soon, or what? He is way too cute to become a has-been.
You want one? They said it was sugar-free, but I don't know.
You don't wanna drink that.
Why? I'm betting Madison gave you a trip to the dentist.
It's her thing.
She does it to people she doesn't like.
She spits in their cocktail and calls it a "Trip to the Dentist" because we're in eighth grade.
What are you doing? Did you give me a Trip to the Dentist the night of Shelly's party? Hello? I have no idea what you're talking about.
Did you spit in your drink and give it to me? Like I was the only person's spit you had in your mouth that night? Regular soda? Why didn't you just fill the cup with lard? - You have no idea what you did to me.
- Oh, my God.
I spit in your drink.
You are, like, so scarred for life.
Duncan! Duncan, what are you doing? Stop that! This is about Veronica, isn't it? You're still in love with her, right? Answer me! Thanks for coming, guys.
I hope you got something to eat.
Now, see, why can't we just be like this? Why do there have to be all those other people in this world? What are you doing? You're too short.
We need to level the playing field.
- Is this where you take all your conquests? - Nope.
Only the short ones.
Hey, I have to tell you something.
I'm sorry.
We're past the confessional portion of this program.
- We're onto the make-out.
- Veronica, stop.
I gotta I have to tell you something about Shelly's party.
There you go.
Go for it.
There you go, sweet piece.
I know about the salt lick.
I'm gonna choose to think of it as one of those "not real" things.
There's more.
What the hell are you doing? She can barely sit up, you freaks! Wait, dude, you can't be the cavalry and a martyr, man.
Pick a side.
Leave her alone.
Hey, I'm sorry, dude.
No, man, I mean, you're totally right.
It's no way to have fun, huh? Cheers.
I just wanted Duncan to have some fun.
- He barely even smiled since Lilly - You didn't know what would happen.
I'm the one who's responsible for what happened to you.
And I can't take that I hurt you like that.
I can't take that I hurt you when all I wanna do is protect you.
I want you to trust me.
I do.
Okay.
I don't know about you, but I could use a refreshment about now.
- You learned that from Lilly.
- No, Lilly learned that from me.
It's almost endearing that I need a key to the liquor cabinet, don't you think? Wow.
Swell, huh? I'll be right back.
Two minutes.
Okay.
- You okay? - Thanks for coming to get me.
Honey, I'm home.
So am I, honey.
So am I.