Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip (2006) s01e22 Episode Script
What Kind of Day Has It Been
Previously on Studio 60: Wes is recovering.
Meaning you're in charge of the most valuable property this network has ever owned.
That sketch is a ticking bomb and it will go off on Monday.
If it makes you feel better, Danny and I have a deal with Jack.
And I kept my promise.
But now we have a problem, as quite frankly I predicted we would.
Sorry, an apology will not be coming.
Five years ago, two words from you, you could've saved your job.
No.
Two words from you five years ago and I could've kept my job.
She developed a postop infection.
There is a chance it could become worse.
"No wonder those guys wanna kill us, I live here and I want to kill us.
" - That's what you said.
- It got out of hand.
- You'll draft an apology and you'll read it.
- I'm not reading anything.
Aljazeera's gonna report they've executed Airman Valdez, Tom I'll get the lawyer back and give them money.
- Wait for verification before - I'm not waiting.
- This is terrorism, this is what they want! - Face the facts, would you? It works.
- Danny.
- Matt? - Hi.
- I told you to stay at the theater.
- I know.
- I told you to stay.
I know.
I went ahead and exercised my judgment.
- When has that ever worked out for us? - I'm fine.
- What are you doing here? - I came here.
- Head wound.
- What happened to Simon? - Went off the rails.
- I know.
- On TV.
- Four in the morning, who's watching? People in New York, it's 7 in the morning.
- How is she? - Same.
You wanna see the baby? - That's what I'm here for.
- Come on.
I'm just gonna stay here and have a concussion.
- All right.
- Okay.
This is my daughter.
Wow.
You know what? I've never felt so much like a man until I just said that.
- She's beautiful.
- I know.
I didn't wanna say it around the other fathers, but I'm pretty sure she's gifted.
- And she's okay? - Yeah.
Because this is the natal ICU.
It's just a precaution.
She's two weeks early, but she's fully cooked.
They gave her a standardized test.
Activity, pulse, respiration.
She got nine out of 10.
What'd she miss? - Grimace.
- Grimace? She missed grimace.
She's supposed to grimace when they touch her with something cold.
Like that's gonna keep her out of Harvard.
- She have a name? - Baby Girl McDeere.
You're hoping that she'll become a stripper? Well, you have to put something Shut up.
Oh, yeah, she's a little knockout.
She looks like her mom.
So, what's happening with Tom? You remember Mary Tate? - The lawyer? - Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Her firm does work for a company called Trask Security that arranges ransom deliveries in Latin America and now they're in Afghanistan too.
She thinks we can buy him back? Working the phones with her partners in London.
Jack's involved.
All right, well, I'm involved too now.
And she mentioned something.
What? Well, she mentioned something.
What? What? You have to get Jordan to sign some papers.
Mary can prepare them right now.
That's why I came down here.
- What kind? - It's nothing.
- Put a pen in her hand, have her sign it.
- What are you talking about? - You know what I'm talking about.
- I don't.
I don't.
I swear to God, I don't.
Isn't there a chance Jordan could die? She's definitely gonna die, just not tonight.
- But if she does - Matt - But if she does - Stop.
But if she does, she goes to the biological father or the State of California and you don't have any rights.
I'll be her husband, I put a ring on her.
Once we're married You're not married.
She has to make you the baby's legal guardian.
I'm not gonna She just had a I'm not gonna I mean, she just I'm not gonna go in there like some guy with a She just had a baby by emergency C-section.
Then nearly bled to death.
Now she's got a postoperative - All right, take it easy.
- A postoperative infection.
And she's probably gonna find a way to blame all this on our ratings.
Yeah, Mama's a loon.
But she loves us.
So we're gonna roll with it, but I would, for the important stuff, come to me.
Shoes, lipstick, talk to her.
Everything else should be me.
- Dan - I'm not doing it.
All right, now, please, go back to the theater.
I want you to tell me more about this private security group so I can help Tom make the decision.
I want you to get Simon out of trouble.
And I want you to keep the staff and the cast together.
I've been doing that.
Simon's on TV saying he understands why the terrorists wanna kill us.
Well, that wasn't his fault.
- Really? - It wasn't entirely his fault.
Go back to the theater.
- Look, I know - Go back to the theater.
She's been under anesthesia.
Hm? She's been under anesthesia.
And she's on a morphine drip and a few other things.
When she's this medicated ask Mary if Jordan's signature would mean anything.
- They still won't let me in there.
- I know.
- Won't let me pick up the baby.
- I know.
They won't let me see Jordan, because she got an infection? - Yes.
- They won't let me pick up the baby.
Afraid that I may steal her and sell her into slavery.
- Yeah.
- In the meantime Tom's brother who joined the Air Force on September 12th is being held by the Taliban.
And Simon has gone on TV and apparently expressed his allegiance to al Qaeda.
This can't possibly be my life.
What we're showing you now is a footage just released on Aljazeera.
The three men appear to be standing in front of the body of an airman a U.
S.
Airman.
They're claiming it's the body of Airman Herman valdez even though this hasn't been confirmed by the Pentagon.
Pentagon sources believe it's likely that this video's been doctored - The video looks real to me.
- It's not.
I don't think they have lot of special effects capabilities in Kandahar.
It's not Herman Valdez, that's a four-week-old dead body.
You don't have to be George Lucas to pull it off.
If it was Valdez they'd show his face.
- You don't know that.
- I do know that and I can confirm that.
- How? - Experts at Aljazeera.
- Our good friends at Aljazeera.
- They take the original tape Why hasn't anybody hit bin Laden's private broadcast studio with a missile yet? They take the original tape for analysis.
They compare it to other tapes for consistency.
They run it through a voice analyzer, look for an encoded date stamp.
They analyze the images using - How long does that take? - Few days.
And how long does it take to slit my little brother's throat from ear to ear? You started the process, didn't you? I did.
- The I.
D.
Process? - Yes.
It must be nice being rich.
- It is.
- And having rich friends.
- Yeah.
- You guys hire your own security your own detectives, and now you're hiring your own army.
Yes, I am.
Because the one I hired with the taxes I pay doesn't seem to be working out.
- Excuse me? - Captain No, excuse me, Another 15,000 left some arms and legs pretty far away from home.
We know how to fight and we know how to win.
It's against the law for me to countermand the commander in chief but you and I know both know where this war is being lost.
- Don't do it.
- All I've done is start the process.
- Don't do it.
- Why not? You don't give money to them and fund their operation.
You don't give them incentive to do it again.
You don't make this world a more dangerous place.
And you don't pay ransom for a member of the U.
S.
Armed Forces.
Well, all that sounds good except for this: That's my parents' kid.
And I'm bringing him home.
When you do, he'll pull out his side arm and cock you with it because I promise you it would be the last thing he wants.
- I don't care.
- This is what he signed up for.
No, it's not.
No, it's not.
He signed up on September 12th.
While we were all scared out of our minds he ran as fast as he could toward what we were scared of.
He was winning till we all rallied around Skippy McDumb-ass while he pulled half the troops out of Afghanistan and put them someplace else.
This country failed my brother.
I'm not going to.
Hire private K and R security to buy him out and that's exactly what you're gonna do.
I think I'd like to not talk for a while.
Sure.
You're still here.
You told me to stay here.
I tell you to do a lot of things.
Well, there are armed guards outside the door.
They're not armed guards, they're NBS security.
They've got flashlights.
Any chance you've calmed down? - I'm completely calm.
- Yeah? You'll read a statement of apology? I said I was calm, I didn't say my spine became detached from my brain.
I think your brain's become detached from your brain.
You said, referring to Islamic terrorists, "No wonder they wanna kill us.
" That, in the business, is what we call a sound bite.
You guys cooking up something for Tom's brother? - Yeah.
- I want in on it.
There's nothing to be in on yet.
There's a company called Trask Security, handles ransom delivery in kidnap cases.
- This isn't a kidnapping, Mark's a prisoner.
- Hard to say.
- Where's the money coming from? - Don't worry about it.
People will kick in, I want mine to be the first account that gets cleared out.
You'll need that money.
- Jack - You ever been married? No.
When you're married, you say "I'm sorry" a lot.
"I'm sorry" when you don't mean it when you don't know what you could've done wrong when you just wanna move the hell on.
You're getting divorced.
- That's right.
- Why? I was tired of saying "I'm sorry.
" - I appreciate your honesty.
- More than I could say for my wife.
- Do you miss her? - Very much.
- Do you think you'll ever get married again? - No.
- Why? - What do you care? I'm just making conversation.
What did you mean, you said before Matt and Danny lost their jobs because you kept your promise? I won't say I'm sorry, think I'll apologize to you? I'm not asking for an apology.
Uh Told them that if the ad reps didn't object to the sketch at dress, they can go on.
- I just should've pulled the plug.
- What'd you do instead? - I did what I do.
- What's that? I did what I do, Simon.
This morning marks the beginning the second week of airstrikes against various targets in Afghanistan.
President Bush made a motion again today with vice President Dick This is still my office, right? - You used to like it when I was in here.
- Your feet are on my desk.
You used to have a lot more of me than that on your desk.
Well, Luke's in good shape, he works out, looks to me like he's got a pretty big desk.
- So, what happened? - Wes is asleep.
What does that mean? I wasn't speaking in code.
Wes is asleep.
The nurse won't wake him up.
When they do wake him up, he'll return Jack's call tell Jack to go screw himself and we can all keep working.
There's really no need for an orange alert.
- Let me ask you a question.
- Sure.
- Lf Al Gore had won the election - He did win the election, but go on.
- Oy.
- Did you just say "oy"? - Yeah.
- Don't anymore.
If Al Gore had won the election if President Gore had sent his top emissary out here say he sent Bill Clinton out here to talk to leaders in Hollywood about how the entertainment industry could help right now would you have had an objection? Hm.
Would you? No.
And what's your smug rejoinder? I don't have one.
I'm saying no, you're right, I wouldn't.
I'd flock to that meeting, so would almost everyone else.
You wouldn't have been able to get a seat.
Here you go.
You don't find that hypocritical? I do.
I think you're making an excellent point.
So the difference is that you don't like them.
- I guess it is.
- You're okay with that? I seem to have made peace with it.
Matthew - What? - Think I have contempt for my government? - Yeah.
- Harry, if I do it's nothing to the contempt my government has for me.
- Your government doesn't know you.
- I know.
But that doesn't stop them from getting votes by calling me a lazy, pampered, anti-American, anti-family, immoral perverted, dishonorable, weak fairy.
What is it you like about Luke? - I'd rather not talk about that.
- I'm sure it's a lot of stuff.
Give me one.
- He's easy.
- Every guy is easy.
No, you moron, not easy to get into bed.
He's easy.
- That's it? - No, that's not it.
You asked me to name one thing.
He's not superior.
That's because he's not superior.
Were you offended by the sketch? - It doesn't matter.
- No, I'm just asking you.
Honestly, I wanna know what you thought.
Matt? Excuse me.
- I just got off the phone with him.
- Wes? - Yeah.
- How is he? He's fine.
And it's all over.
Did he wail on Jack? No.
Wes is gonna issue an apology on behalf of the show.
What are you talking about? Wes is the face of Studio 60, he always has been.
He feels the apology should come from him.
We're off the hook.
- He's apologizing? - Yeah, in a press release.
He caved? I couldn't tell you what happened in the call between Wes and Jack.
- I'm calling Wes.
- Leave it.
- No.
- Matty, leave it the hell alone! Okay? Screw last week's show, we have to do this week's show.
I'll be in my office.
I don't understand why Suzanne gave me the number of a pay phone.
- I didn't know there still were.
- Cell phones aren't allowed here.
- They screw with heart monitors.
- Why? I don't know, why don't I go to medical school for six years and find out? - What's happening there? - Nothing's changed.
Nothing's changed.
Suzanne's bringing over the papers, okay? - Does she know what they are? - No.
- Dan? - Did you ask Mary about the? Yeah.
How groggy is Jordan? I doubt she knows where she is or what's happening.
Okay.
She probably doesn't know she had the baby.
Mary says that if it's contested, that's gonna be a problem but that it's better than nothing.
You think it's really better than nothing? I do.
And I think Jordan would be counting on you to do this.
Put a pen in her hand.
- Keep calling me, okay? - Yeah.
I've got tuna, I've got turkey.
I've got coffee and I got a cookie, but that's for me.
Come in.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- I called Wes.
- Yeah, I figured you would.
- What'd he say? - Not much.
Shortest conversation we had.
He said, "I don't like the climate out there.
" I made a joke about it being a dry heat, he didn't say anything.
Let's not make a big deal out of it, but I'm gonna have to quit my job, Dan.
I think I knew you were gonna say that.
It's dumb in about nine different ways, but I knew you'll come in here and say that.
- I'm not an angry young man.
- I know.
- That's why I can't understand why - Because we're getting bullied.
We're this close to having the show.
We're gonna be the executive producers of Studio 60.
Look at me and tell me you weren't shocked that Wes agreed to apologize.
I don't like the climate out there.
We won't make a big deal out of it.
Great.
- Come in.
- We have to come up with a solution.
Oh, we did.
Wes is issuing an apology.
We have to come up with a different solution.
Why? Because Matt just quit.
Well, I'm pretty sure we've got a contract with him.
Then sue him, Jack, because he just quit.
I'm sure the show will go on.
To be honest with you, I'm not quite sure how.
- Matt's been the show the last two years.
- The cast is the show.
- And the reason you're able to say that? - Yes? You don't know what you're talking about! Matt writes the show! It started with a little, turned into a lot, turned into the whole thing.
Matt writes it, I produce.
And Wes sits in his office dying of old age.
What did you say to him? - I'm sorry? - What did you say to Wes? I meant, you're speaking to me like I'm an ill-behaved member of your staff? We got a serious problem here.
Where were you when I said that? Standing here, but this is more serious than frightened affiliates.
- Nothing's more serious than them.
- Jack.
Look, I know he's your friend, I know you're honorable guys and I respect that.
I also believe you're patriots.
- But the fact is - What? - The fact is that something had - Screw friendship, screw honor screw patriotism, we just lost the franchise.
Oh, please.
Show's been on for 15 years, it's had, like, eight head writers a couple of hundred staff writers, it'll be fine.
Studio 60's a restaurant with a good location.
- Give him a couple days, he'll come back.
- No, he won't.
- Danny - No, he won't.
He goes out the door, I promise you it'll take an extraordinary event to get him back.
I'll just have to see if I can keep on breathing without Matt Albie.
Not worried about the press that will be created by Matt quitting? - No.
- Why? Because we'll look like the good guys.
What did you say to Wes? Didn't have to say much, Danny.
- He's quitting? - Keep your voice down.
I tried to talk to him, he's not here anymore.
- Yeah.
- This is getting out of hand.
- This is ridiculous.
- Yeah.
Don't keep saying "yeah," talk him in from the ledge.
If he's not here, then he's already jumped.
- Matt is gone? - Yeah.
- You seem very casual about this.
- I'm not.
- That's it? - Yeah.
- Stop saying "yeah.
" - What do you want? - For one, who will write the show? - That will be somebody else's problem.
Why? Well, because I'm quitting too.
- You've both lost it.
- Yeah.
This is a career decision.
You can't decide like this in the two-minute-walk back from the NBS building.
- I didn't need the whole two minutes.
- You don't care about politics.
- Not much.
- Then why are you doing this? I just stood in Jack's office and said: "Screw friendship, screw honor, screw patriotism.
" That's how I talked about myself.
And then I added, "We just lost the franchise.
" That's how I talked about Matt who would stand in front of a train for any one of us including you while you're screwing Luke.
He's been threatened by the network, compromised by me, browbeaten by you gotten his heart broken by Wes and he's still standing up.
Why am I quitting? Because they'll start shooting at him.
I'll be standing next to him when they do.
You're a talented girl, have a good show this week.
You have any regrets about that? Yeah, I can't believe it took me that long to stand next to him.
Why the hell can't you two get it together? It's not like we haven't tried.
- You haven't tried.
- It's been how many years? You haven't.
You believe in the divinity of Jesus and he doesn't? Are you kidding me? Who gives a damn? Are you in love with him? - You know the answer.
- You're in love with him.
He's the only one I've ever been in love with.
But it looks like that's not enough.
- It is.
- It's not.
- How can you say that? - Because He's never gonna forgive me for not quitting too.
He never once mentioned that He wasn't asking anybody to join his army.
He's never been angry with you about God, he worships you, Harry.
I get that he respects my ability.
I'm not talking about your stage presence, I'm talking about you.
He's in love with you, and you're the only one he's ever loved.
When you guys got in that fight at the Catholics dinner when you wanted to get back with Luke - I was angry and I - He went down the rabbit hole.
What do you mean? He's been writing the show high.
On what? Painkillers and vodka.
I'm sure whatever else he can get his hands on.
- How did I not know this? - He's very good at it.
- Danny.
- Are those the papers from Mary Tate? - Yeah.
- I need to get into Jordan's room.
- Where is Matt right now? - Somewhere in the building.
- Do you want me to call him? - Nurse? Excuse me, I have to see Jordan.
Hose me, dunk me in alcohol.
Do whatever they did to Karen Silkwood.
What do I do? You need to wash your hands thoroughly and wear a mask.
- Wash my hands? - Yes.
That's what I I couldn't have done that three hours ago? Wanna wash your hands or stand here and fight with me? Wash my hands.
- Well, it's a very close toss-up, lady.
- Danny? I'm washing my hands, then I'm going in to have Jordan sign some documents.
I want you to witness her signing and take strict notes while it's happening.
I need to talk to you a second.
Oh, God, come on.
Jordan.
Jordan.
- What happened? - You're all right, everything's all right.
I can't remember anything.
This'll help.
Oh, my God.
- Hi.
Is she all right? - Yeah.
She's perfect.
She got a nine out of 10 on the Apgar.
- Nine out of 10? - Yeah.
- What did she miss? - She didn't grimace.
But we're gonna work on that.
Yeah, this kid isn't gonna be under a lot of pressure at home.
- You're so beautiful.
- Yeah.
You're so beautiful, baby.
I know.
Hi.
They took this off before you went into surgery.
Oh, yeah, now I remember everything.
- You didn't change your mind? - No.
You're an idiot, though.
- What did I do? - We're both idiots.
- Can you get my bag? - Your bag? I had a bag here with me when I came.
- Don't worry.
- Please get my bag.
That would be in the closet.
A terrible chance we took.
I should've had you sign.
- What are you talking about? - I need you to sign some papers.
I need you to do it now before we do anything else.
What kind of papers? Adoption papers.
You You drew up adoption papers? Yeah.
How did you know I was gonna propose? I didn't, I just hoped.
Since when? - Remember the first time I met you? - Yeah.
Since then.
- The biological? - He consented as soon as I asked.
So, what do you say? Do you wanna be her father? I need a pen.
She needs a name.
I'd like to name her after my grandmother.
- What's your grandmother's name? - Rebecca.
Rebecca? That's a good name.
Becky.
- Rebecca McDeere.
- No.
Look at what you just signed.
"Rebecca Tripp.
" Thank you.
Oh, boy.
Jordan's out of the woods.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
That's the best news I've heard all night.
- Isn't it? - Yeah.
Well, let's celebrate by having you go out and reading a statement of apology.
Why don't I just put on some clown white and do a minstrel show? You think this has something to do with you being black? Yeah, it's gonna be worse for me, isn't it? - Isn't it? - Yeah.
You don't see a lot of black folk with flag decals on their cars.
Yeah.
No.
There's a general feeling that since we got our asses kicked for 400 years that loyalty to America isn't a big topic at the dinner table.
You don't see a lot of us in Norman Rockwell paintings.
- No.
- We're borderline Americans to some.
- Some people.
- To a lot of people.
Despite the fact that no group has done more or sacrificed more for the betterment of this country.
I won't argue with that.
You can't argue with that because you have a brain.
We'll leave aside that the black population of the armed services is much higher than the general population.
I've been sitting here for close to four hours is that I wanna help.
I think you do wanna help, but you've been sitting here for four hours because you feel guilty about Matt and Danny.
- Man, that was five years ago.
- You remembered the story pretty well.
Hey, I wasn't the bad guy.
I gave them every chance.
I gave them every frigging chance.
You know what, not everything is McCarthyism.
You go back and you ask those guys that ran the networks and the studios back then, you go, you ask You go back and ask You You can't.
- Jack? - You can't ask those guys.
We don't know who they were.
We know McCarthy and Cohn.
We know the guys that wrote the list.
We just don't know the guys who gave a damn.
Hm.
L - I thought the sketch was good.
- Matt's sketch? I didn't have a problem with the sketch at all.
I always knew Wes was an empty shirt, but I wasn't.
I didn't have a problem with the sketch.
- Simon? - Yeah.
You didn't mean what you said tonight.
Any child could see that you didn't mean what you said tonight.
There is no reason you have to go out and apologize.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
I will now go out and apologize.
No.
Simon, no.
- No, I wanted to hear you say it.
- You're not doing it.
- It's one less headache, it's no big deal.
- It is.
- I'm apologizing.
- Network's not asking you to do that.
- You got one for free.
- I don't want this one.
- We're all square.
- You'd be giving them apology as theater.
You'd be dancing for them, it would be a minstrel show.
Oh, like everything's about race? Okay, you know what I'm gonna do now? I'm just gonna beat you up.
All right, let's go, you and me.
Double or nothing the one week's pay I lost because I'm apologizing before sunrise.
The sun is not fully up, you didn't make it, I owe you the money.
The bet was I'd apologize before the sun comes up, I owe you money.
The sun is not fully up! - Do you think it's gonna go back down? - All right, come here, take your ass kicking.
All right, not in the face, I'm on TV.
- For now maybe.
Let's go, come on.
- Something's going on.
- With what? - Tom's brother.
- What's happening? - I'm doing it.
We'll go with Trask.
Get Mary.
- What happened? - Get Mary to call the people.
- Mary's coming.
- Guy on the news - An embedded reporter in Kandahar - What happened? Tomcats were scrambled out of Bagram an hour ago along with three Apache attack helicopters.
What does that mean? What does that mean? Not talking, he's been on that phone for 10 minutes.
Scrambled the planes and sent in the helicopters? They know the prisoners are dead, they'll bomb the place.
- Tom? - That's what it means? - Tom.
- That's what it means? Tell me.
I will, I just wanted to know if you wanted to talk to your brother first.
- What? - Do you wanna talk to your brother? He's on the phone.
- What? - Your brother Mark is on the phone.
He, Smith and a very much alive Valdez are onboard a Black Hawk helicopter part of a Special Forces unit that just completed a successful rescue mission.
- Anyway, this phone call isn't cheap, so - Mark? It's my brother.
Thank you, God.
I heard that.
What the hell? It's me, Jell-O-head.
They rescued the guys.
I just heard.
- You know, Jordan's okay.
- Yeah.
Have you been getting high since our fight at the Catholics dinner? Yeah.
I like that you didn't lie to me just now.
Well, you know, I like to think that You kept that from me? When you're high, you keep it from everyone.
Not me.
Never me.
I'm the one person.
Okay.
I'm the one person.
Always.
Okay.
I'm the one person, Matthew.
I love you.
Wait.
We can't do this while you're running the show.
- Why not? - Because you said so.
You can't be the boss and be with me.
I think I may have been wrong.
- What? - I think I was wrong.
No, I don't understand those words coming from your mouth.
Say them again.
- Don't be a wise-ass.
- I'm paid to be a wise-ass.
Say it again.
- I think I was wrong.
- You think? - I may have been wrong.
- You're getting there.
- Herb? - Yeah? Do you have any problem if I go out with Harriet? Huh? All right.
Dylan, Alex, do you have any problem with Harry and me being together? - Nope.
- No.
Samantha, do you have any problem if I date a cast member? - Is it me? - No.
- Then no.
- Jeannie? Can I still sleep with you? - No.
- No.
Then, Andy, it is your lucky day.
- What'd I do? - You get to sleep with Jeannie.
- All right.
- There it is.
Any reason you couldn't have done that nine months ago? Hm.
Here we go.
Everybody gets a cigar! Tommy, have a cigar, I got a daughter.
That's fantastic, man.
I got a brother.
Well, then, have two cigars.
- Lucy, honey, stop crying, it's over.
I'm not crying.
- What? - She said she's not crying.
- I was calm throughout the whole ordeal.
- "I was calm throughout the whole ordeal.
" - All right.
Look - I've given up my rule.
And Harry and I are gonna be together.
I'm sure that comes as a pretty big shock to everyone.
I'm going to the airport, I'm going to Germany.
- You're excused.
- Can I go with him? - Can I go with him? - No.
- Danny.
- No.
Enough.
We did a good show tonight, but we can do better.
We can do better.
So we'll start again on Monday with the full writing staff, Lucy.
This was a hell of a night.
Everybody go home, get some sleep.
Be healthy.
- I will see you on Monday.
Good night.
- Good night, everybody.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Hey, I'm all for it, but not in front of me, okay? I'm gonna go grab some stuff in my dressing room.
Mazel tov.
Gesundheit.
Unbelievable.
- What? - Everything.
You think you and Harriet will stay together this time? Till we break up again.
But at least we'll always come back.
One of these days, you might wanna try the whole process under the same roof with less time between makeup scenes.
One of these days.
Thanks for keeping everyone together tonight.
- I'm going back to the hospital.
- Okay.
- Where you going? - My office.
- Go home.
- No.
- Matt, go home.
- I'm feeling good.
You gotta go to sleep.
- You're not going to sleep.
- I'm a father.
Are you gonna be holding that over my head till I'm a father? Just go home.
No, if we'll do a better show next week, I'm gonna need a head start.
- All right.
- All right.
Hey, Matthew, don't take this the wrong way but I love you.
- Okay.
- Did you take it the wrong way? I took it to mean that you're gay and you want me.
Good.
I love you too, brother.
Okay.
This is true.
I'm gonna make a friend out of you yet.
Meaning you're in charge of the most valuable property this network has ever owned.
That sketch is a ticking bomb and it will go off on Monday.
If it makes you feel better, Danny and I have a deal with Jack.
And I kept my promise.
But now we have a problem, as quite frankly I predicted we would.
Sorry, an apology will not be coming.
Five years ago, two words from you, you could've saved your job.
No.
Two words from you five years ago and I could've kept my job.
She developed a postop infection.
There is a chance it could become worse.
"No wonder those guys wanna kill us, I live here and I want to kill us.
" - That's what you said.
- It got out of hand.
- You'll draft an apology and you'll read it.
- I'm not reading anything.
Aljazeera's gonna report they've executed Airman Valdez, Tom I'll get the lawyer back and give them money.
- Wait for verification before - I'm not waiting.
- This is terrorism, this is what they want! - Face the facts, would you? It works.
- Danny.
- Matt? - Hi.
- I told you to stay at the theater.
- I know.
- I told you to stay.
I know.
I went ahead and exercised my judgment.
- When has that ever worked out for us? - I'm fine.
- What are you doing here? - I came here.
- Head wound.
- What happened to Simon? - Went off the rails.
- I know.
- On TV.
- Four in the morning, who's watching? People in New York, it's 7 in the morning.
- How is she? - Same.
You wanna see the baby? - That's what I'm here for.
- Come on.
I'm just gonna stay here and have a concussion.
- All right.
- Okay.
This is my daughter.
Wow.
You know what? I've never felt so much like a man until I just said that.
- She's beautiful.
- I know.
I didn't wanna say it around the other fathers, but I'm pretty sure she's gifted.
- And she's okay? - Yeah.
Because this is the natal ICU.
It's just a precaution.
She's two weeks early, but she's fully cooked.
They gave her a standardized test.
Activity, pulse, respiration.
She got nine out of 10.
What'd she miss? - Grimace.
- Grimace? She missed grimace.
She's supposed to grimace when they touch her with something cold.
Like that's gonna keep her out of Harvard.
- She have a name? - Baby Girl McDeere.
You're hoping that she'll become a stripper? Well, you have to put something Shut up.
Oh, yeah, she's a little knockout.
She looks like her mom.
So, what's happening with Tom? You remember Mary Tate? - The lawyer? - Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Her firm does work for a company called Trask Security that arranges ransom deliveries in Latin America and now they're in Afghanistan too.
She thinks we can buy him back? Working the phones with her partners in London.
Jack's involved.
All right, well, I'm involved too now.
And she mentioned something.
What? Well, she mentioned something.
What? What? You have to get Jordan to sign some papers.
Mary can prepare them right now.
That's why I came down here.
- What kind? - It's nothing.
- Put a pen in her hand, have her sign it.
- What are you talking about? - You know what I'm talking about.
- I don't.
I don't.
I swear to God, I don't.
Isn't there a chance Jordan could die? She's definitely gonna die, just not tonight.
- But if she does - Matt - But if she does - Stop.
But if she does, she goes to the biological father or the State of California and you don't have any rights.
I'll be her husband, I put a ring on her.
Once we're married You're not married.
She has to make you the baby's legal guardian.
I'm not gonna She just had a I'm not gonna I mean, she just I'm not gonna go in there like some guy with a She just had a baby by emergency C-section.
Then nearly bled to death.
Now she's got a postoperative - All right, take it easy.
- A postoperative infection.
And she's probably gonna find a way to blame all this on our ratings.
Yeah, Mama's a loon.
But she loves us.
So we're gonna roll with it, but I would, for the important stuff, come to me.
Shoes, lipstick, talk to her.
Everything else should be me.
- Dan - I'm not doing it.
All right, now, please, go back to the theater.
I want you to tell me more about this private security group so I can help Tom make the decision.
I want you to get Simon out of trouble.
And I want you to keep the staff and the cast together.
I've been doing that.
Simon's on TV saying he understands why the terrorists wanna kill us.
Well, that wasn't his fault.
- Really? - It wasn't entirely his fault.
Go back to the theater.
- Look, I know - Go back to the theater.
She's been under anesthesia.
Hm? She's been under anesthesia.
And she's on a morphine drip and a few other things.
When she's this medicated ask Mary if Jordan's signature would mean anything.
- They still won't let me in there.
- I know.
- Won't let me pick up the baby.
- I know.
They won't let me see Jordan, because she got an infection? - Yes.
- They won't let me pick up the baby.
Afraid that I may steal her and sell her into slavery.
- Yeah.
- In the meantime Tom's brother who joined the Air Force on September 12th is being held by the Taliban.
And Simon has gone on TV and apparently expressed his allegiance to al Qaeda.
This can't possibly be my life.
What we're showing you now is a footage just released on Aljazeera.
The three men appear to be standing in front of the body of an airman a U.
S.
Airman.
They're claiming it's the body of Airman Herman valdez even though this hasn't been confirmed by the Pentagon.
Pentagon sources believe it's likely that this video's been doctored - The video looks real to me.
- It's not.
I don't think they have lot of special effects capabilities in Kandahar.
It's not Herman Valdez, that's a four-week-old dead body.
You don't have to be George Lucas to pull it off.
If it was Valdez they'd show his face.
- You don't know that.
- I do know that and I can confirm that.
- How? - Experts at Aljazeera.
- Our good friends at Aljazeera.
- They take the original tape Why hasn't anybody hit bin Laden's private broadcast studio with a missile yet? They take the original tape for analysis.
They compare it to other tapes for consistency.
They run it through a voice analyzer, look for an encoded date stamp.
They analyze the images using - How long does that take? - Few days.
And how long does it take to slit my little brother's throat from ear to ear? You started the process, didn't you? I did.
- The I.
D.
Process? - Yes.
It must be nice being rich.
- It is.
- And having rich friends.
- Yeah.
- You guys hire your own security your own detectives, and now you're hiring your own army.
Yes, I am.
Because the one I hired with the taxes I pay doesn't seem to be working out.
- Excuse me? - Captain No, excuse me, Another 15,000 left some arms and legs pretty far away from home.
We know how to fight and we know how to win.
It's against the law for me to countermand the commander in chief but you and I know both know where this war is being lost.
- Don't do it.
- All I've done is start the process.
- Don't do it.
- Why not? You don't give money to them and fund their operation.
You don't give them incentive to do it again.
You don't make this world a more dangerous place.
And you don't pay ransom for a member of the U.
S.
Armed Forces.
Well, all that sounds good except for this: That's my parents' kid.
And I'm bringing him home.
When you do, he'll pull out his side arm and cock you with it because I promise you it would be the last thing he wants.
- I don't care.
- This is what he signed up for.
No, it's not.
No, it's not.
He signed up on September 12th.
While we were all scared out of our minds he ran as fast as he could toward what we were scared of.
He was winning till we all rallied around Skippy McDumb-ass while he pulled half the troops out of Afghanistan and put them someplace else.
This country failed my brother.
I'm not going to.
Hire private K and R security to buy him out and that's exactly what you're gonna do.
I think I'd like to not talk for a while.
Sure.
You're still here.
You told me to stay here.
I tell you to do a lot of things.
Well, there are armed guards outside the door.
They're not armed guards, they're NBS security.
They've got flashlights.
Any chance you've calmed down? - I'm completely calm.
- Yeah? You'll read a statement of apology? I said I was calm, I didn't say my spine became detached from my brain.
I think your brain's become detached from your brain.
You said, referring to Islamic terrorists, "No wonder they wanna kill us.
" That, in the business, is what we call a sound bite.
You guys cooking up something for Tom's brother? - Yeah.
- I want in on it.
There's nothing to be in on yet.
There's a company called Trask Security, handles ransom delivery in kidnap cases.
- This isn't a kidnapping, Mark's a prisoner.
- Hard to say.
- Where's the money coming from? - Don't worry about it.
People will kick in, I want mine to be the first account that gets cleared out.
You'll need that money.
- Jack - You ever been married? No.
When you're married, you say "I'm sorry" a lot.
"I'm sorry" when you don't mean it when you don't know what you could've done wrong when you just wanna move the hell on.
You're getting divorced.
- That's right.
- Why? I was tired of saying "I'm sorry.
" - I appreciate your honesty.
- More than I could say for my wife.
- Do you miss her? - Very much.
- Do you think you'll ever get married again? - No.
- Why? - What do you care? I'm just making conversation.
What did you mean, you said before Matt and Danny lost their jobs because you kept your promise? I won't say I'm sorry, think I'll apologize to you? I'm not asking for an apology.
Uh Told them that if the ad reps didn't object to the sketch at dress, they can go on.
- I just should've pulled the plug.
- What'd you do instead? - I did what I do.
- What's that? I did what I do, Simon.
This morning marks the beginning the second week of airstrikes against various targets in Afghanistan.
President Bush made a motion again today with vice President Dick This is still my office, right? - You used to like it when I was in here.
- Your feet are on my desk.
You used to have a lot more of me than that on your desk.
Well, Luke's in good shape, he works out, looks to me like he's got a pretty big desk.
- So, what happened? - Wes is asleep.
What does that mean? I wasn't speaking in code.
Wes is asleep.
The nurse won't wake him up.
When they do wake him up, he'll return Jack's call tell Jack to go screw himself and we can all keep working.
There's really no need for an orange alert.
- Let me ask you a question.
- Sure.
- Lf Al Gore had won the election - He did win the election, but go on.
- Oy.
- Did you just say "oy"? - Yeah.
- Don't anymore.
If Al Gore had won the election if President Gore had sent his top emissary out here say he sent Bill Clinton out here to talk to leaders in Hollywood about how the entertainment industry could help right now would you have had an objection? Hm.
Would you? No.
And what's your smug rejoinder? I don't have one.
I'm saying no, you're right, I wouldn't.
I'd flock to that meeting, so would almost everyone else.
You wouldn't have been able to get a seat.
Here you go.
You don't find that hypocritical? I do.
I think you're making an excellent point.
So the difference is that you don't like them.
- I guess it is.
- You're okay with that? I seem to have made peace with it.
Matthew - What? - Think I have contempt for my government? - Yeah.
- Harry, if I do it's nothing to the contempt my government has for me.
- Your government doesn't know you.
- I know.
But that doesn't stop them from getting votes by calling me a lazy, pampered, anti-American, anti-family, immoral perverted, dishonorable, weak fairy.
What is it you like about Luke? - I'd rather not talk about that.
- I'm sure it's a lot of stuff.
Give me one.
- He's easy.
- Every guy is easy.
No, you moron, not easy to get into bed.
He's easy.
- That's it? - No, that's not it.
You asked me to name one thing.
He's not superior.
That's because he's not superior.
Were you offended by the sketch? - It doesn't matter.
- No, I'm just asking you.
Honestly, I wanna know what you thought.
Matt? Excuse me.
- I just got off the phone with him.
- Wes? - Yeah.
- How is he? He's fine.
And it's all over.
Did he wail on Jack? No.
Wes is gonna issue an apology on behalf of the show.
What are you talking about? Wes is the face of Studio 60, he always has been.
He feels the apology should come from him.
We're off the hook.
- He's apologizing? - Yeah, in a press release.
He caved? I couldn't tell you what happened in the call between Wes and Jack.
- I'm calling Wes.
- Leave it.
- No.
- Matty, leave it the hell alone! Okay? Screw last week's show, we have to do this week's show.
I'll be in my office.
I don't understand why Suzanne gave me the number of a pay phone.
- I didn't know there still were.
- Cell phones aren't allowed here.
- They screw with heart monitors.
- Why? I don't know, why don't I go to medical school for six years and find out? - What's happening there? - Nothing's changed.
Nothing's changed.
Suzanne's bringing over the papers, okay? - Does she know what they are? - No.
- Dan? - Did you ask Mary about the? Yeah.
How groggy is Jordan? I doubt she knows where she is or what's happening.
Okay.
She probably doesn't know she had the baby.
Mary says that if it's contested, that's gonna be a problem but that it's better than nothing.
You think it's really better than nothing? I do.
And I think Jordan would be counting on you to do this.
Put a pen in her hand.
- Keep calling me, okay? - Yeah.
I've got tuna, I've got turkey.
I've got coffee and I got a cookie, but that's for me.
Come in.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- I called Wes.
- Yeah, I figured you would.
- What'd he say? - Not much.
Shortest conversation we had.
He said, "I don't like the climate out there.
" I made a joke about it being a dry heat, he didn't say anything.
Let's not make a big deal out of it, but I'm gonna have to quit my job, Dan.
I think I knew you were gonna say that.
It's dumb in about nine different ways, but I knew you'll come in here and say that.
- I'm not an angry young man.
- I know.
- That's why I can't understand why - Because we're getting bullied.
We're this close to having the show.
We're gonna be the executive producers of Studio 60.
Look at me and tell me you weren't shocked that Wes agreed to apologize.
I don't like the climate out there.
We won't make a big deal out of it.
Great.
- Come in.
- We have to come up with a solution.
Oh, we did.
Wes is issuing an apology.
We have to come up with a different solution.
Why? Because Matt just quit.
Well, I'm pretty sure we've got a contract with him.
Then sue him, Jack, because he just quit.
I'm sure the show will go on.
To be honest with you, I'm not quite sure how.
- Matt's been the show the last two years.
- The cast is the show.
- And the reason you're able to say that? - Yes? You don't know what you're talking about! Matt writes the show! It started with a little, turned into a lot, turned into the whole thing.
Matt writes it, I produce.
And Wes sits in his office dying of old age.
What did you say to him? - I'm sorry? - What did you say to Wes? I meant, you're speaking to me like I'm an ill-behaved member of your staff? We got a serious problem here.
Where were you when I said that? Standing here, but this is more serious than frightened affiliates.
- Nothing's more serious than them.
- Jack.
Look, I know he's your friend, I know you're honorable guys and I respect that.
I also believe you're patriots.
- But the fact is - What? - The fact is that something had - Screw friendship, screw honor screw patriotism, we just lost the franchise.
Oh, please.
Show's been on for 15 years, it's had, like, eight head writers a couple of hundred staff writers, it'll be fine.
Studio 60's a restaurant with a good location.
- Give him a couple days, he'll come back.
- No, he won't.
- Danny - No, he won't.
He goes out the door, I promise you it'll take an extraordinary event to get him back.
I'll just have to see if I can keep on breathing without Matt Albie.
Not worried about the press that will be created by Matt quitting? - No.
- Why? Because we'll look like the good guys.
What did you say to Wes? Didn't have to say much, Danny.
- He's quitting? - Keep your voice down.
I tried to talk to him, he's not here anymore.
- Yeah.
- This is getting out of hand.
- This is ridiculous.
- Yeah.
Don't keep saying "yeah," talk him in from the ledge.
If he's not here, then he's already jumped.
- Matt is gone? - Yeah.
- You seem very casual about this.
- I'm not.
- That's it? - Yeah.
- Stop saying "yeah.
" - What do you want? - For one, who will write the show? - That will be somebody else's problem.
Why? Well, because I'm quitting too.
- You've both lost it.
- Yeah.
This is a career decision.
You can't decide like this in the two-minute-walk back from the NBS building.
- I didn't need the whole two minutes.
- You don't care about politics.
- Not much.
- Then why are you doing this? I just stood in Jack's office and said: "Screw friendship, screw honor, screw patriotism.
" That's how I talked about myself.
And then I added, "We just lost the franchise.
" That's how I talked about Matt who would stand in front of a train for any one of us including you while you're screwing Luke.
He's been threatened by the network, compromised by me, browbeaten by you gotten his heart broken by Wes and he's still standing up.
Why am I quitting? Because they'll start shooting at him.
I'll be standing next to him when they do.
You're a talented girl, have a good show this week.
You have any regrets about that? Yeah, I can't believe it took me that long to stand next to him.
Why the hell can't you two get it together? It's not like we haven't tried.
- You haven't tried.
- It's been how many years? You haven't.
You believe in the divinity of Jesus and he doesn't? Are you kidding me? Who gives a damn? Are you in love with him? - You know the answer.
- You're in love with him.
He's the only one I've ever been in love with.
But it looks like that's not enough.
- It is.
- It's not.
- How can you say that? - Because He's never gonna forgive me for not quitting too.
He never once mentioned that He wasn't asking anybody to join his army.
He's never been angry with you about God, he worships you, Harry.
I get that he respects my ability.
I'm not talking about your stage presence, I'm talking about you.
He's in love with you, and you're the only one he's ever loved.
When you guys got in that fight at the Catholics dinner when you wanted to get back with Luke - I was angry and I - He went down the rabbit hole.
What do you mean? He's been writing the show high.
On what? Painkillers and vodka.
I'm sure whatever else he can get his hands on.
- How did I not know this? - He's very good at it.
- Danny.
- Are those the papers from Mary Tate? - Yeah.
- I need to get into Jordan's room.
- Where is Matt right now? - Somewhere in the building.
- Do you want me to call him? - Nurse? Excuse me, I have to see Jordan.
Hose me, dunk me in alcohol.
Do whatever they did to Karen Silkwood.
What do I do? You need to wash your hands thoroughly and wear a mask.
- Wash my hands? - Yes.
That's what I I couldn't have done that three hours ago? Wanna wash your hands or stand here and fight with me? Wash my hands.
- Well, it's a very close toss-up, lady.
- Danny? I'm washing my hands, then I'm going in to have Jordan sign some documents.
I want you to witness her signing and take strict notes while it's happening.
I need to talk to you a second.
Oh, God, come on.
Jordan.
Jordan.
- What happened? - You're all right, everything's all right.
I can't remember anything.
This'll help.
Oh, my God.
- Hi.
Is she all right? - Yeah.
She's perfect.
She got a nine out of 10 on the Apgar.
- Nine out of 10? - Yeah.
- What did she miss? - She didn't grimace.
But we're gonna work on that.
Yeah, this kid isn't gonna be under a lot of pressure at home.
- You're so beautiful.
- Yeah.
You're so beautiful, baby.
I know.
Hi.
They took this off before you went into surgery.
Oh, yeah, now I remember everything.
- You didn't change your mind? - No.
You're an idiot, though.
- What did I do? - We're both idiots.
- Can you get my bag? - Your bag? I had a bag here with me when I came.
- Don't worry.
- Please get my bag.
That would be in the closet.
A terrible chance we took.
I should've had you sign.
- What are you talking about? - I need you to sign some papers.
I need you to do it now before we do anything else.
What kind of papers? Adoption papers.
You You drew up adoption papers? Yeah.
How did you know I was gonna propose? I didn't, I just hoped.
Since when? - Remember the first time I met you? - Yeah.
Since then.
- The biological? - He consented as soon as I asked.
So, what do you say? Do you wanna be her father? I need a pen.
She needs a name.
I'd like to name her after my grandmother.
- What's your grandmother's name? - Rebecca.
Rebecca? That's a good name.
Becky.
- Rebecca McDeere.
- No.
Look at what you just signed.
"Rebecca Tripp.
" Thank you.
Oh, boy.
Jordan's out of the woods.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
That's the best news I've heard all night.
- Isn't it? - Yeah.
Well, let's celebrate by having you go out and reading a statement of apology.
Why don't I just put on some clown white and do a minstrel show? You think this has something to do with you being black? Yeah, it's gonna be worse for me, isn't it? - Isn't it? - Yeah.
You don't see a lot of black folk with flag decals on their cars.
Yeah.
No.
There's a general feeling that since we got our asses kicked for 400 years that loyalty to America isn't a big topic at the dinner table.
You don't see a lot of us in Norman Rockwell paintings.
- No.
- We're borderline Americans to some.
- Some people.
- To a lot of people.
Despite the fact that no group has done more or sacrificed more for the betterment of this country.
I won't argue with that.
You can't argue with that because you have a brain.
We'll leave aside that the black population of the armed services is much higher than the general population.
I've been sitting here for close to four hours is that I wanna help.
I think you do wanna help, but you've been sitting here for four hours because you feel guilty about Matt and Danny.
- Man, that was five years ago.
- You remembered the story pretty well.
Hey, I wasn't the bad guy.
I gave them every chance.
I gave them every frigging chance.
You know what, not everything is McCarthyism.
You go back and you ask those guys that ran the networks and the studios back then, you go, you ask You go back and ask You You can't.
- Jack? - You can't ask those guys.
We don't know who they were.
We know McCarthy and Cohn.
We know the guys that wrote the list.
We just don't know the guys who gave a damn.
Hm.
L - I thought the sketch was good.
- Matt's sketch? I didn't have a problem with the sketch at all.
I always knew Wes was an empty shirt, but I wasn't.
I didn't have a problem with the sketch.
- Simon? - Yeah.
You didn't mean what you said tonight.
Any child could see that you didn't mean what you said tonight.
There is no reason you have to go out and apologize.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
I will now go out and apologize.
No.
Simon, no.
- No, I wanted to hear you say it.
- You're not doing it.
- It's one less headache, it's no big deal.
- It is.
- I'm apologizing.
- Network's not asking you to do that.
- You got one for free.
- I don't want this one.
- We're all square.
- You'd be giving them apology as theater.
You'd be dancing for them, it would be a minstrel show.
Oh, like everything's about race? Okay, you know what I'm gonna do now? I'm just gonna beat you up.
All right, let's go, you and me.
Double or nothing the one week's pay I lost because I'm apologizing before sunrise.
The sun is not fully up, you didn't make it, I owe you the money.
The bet was I'd apologize before the sun comes up, I owe you money.
The sun is not fully up! - Do you think it's gonna go back down? - All right, come here, take your ass kicking.
All right, not in the face, I'm on TV.
- For now maybe.
Let's go, come on.
- Something's going on.
- With what? - Tom's brother.
- What's happening? - I'm doing it.
We'll go with Trask.
Get Mary.
- What happened? - Get Mary to call the people.
- Mary's coming.
- Guy on the news - An embedded reporter in Kandahar - What happened? Tomcats were scrambled out of Bagram an hour ago along with three Apache attack helicopters.
What does that mean? What does that mean? Not talking, he's been on that phone for 10 minutes.
Scrambled the planes and sent in the helicopters? They know the prisoners are dead, they'll bomb the place.
- Tom? - That's what it means? - Tom.
- That's what it means? Tell me.
I will, I just wanted to know if you wanted to talk to your brother first.
- What? - Do you wanna talk to your brother? He's on the phone.
- What? - Your brother Mark is on the phone.
He, Smith and a very much alive Valdez are onboard a Black Hawk helicopter part of a Special Forces unit that just completed a successful rescue mission.
- Anyway, this phone call isn't cheap, so - Mark? It's my brother.
Thank you, God.
I heard that.
What the hell? It's me, Jell-O-head.
They rescued the guys.
I just heard.
- You know, Jordan's okay.
- Yeah.
Have you been getting high since our fight at the Catholics dinner? Yeah.
I like that you didn't lie to me just now.
Well, you know, I like to think that You kept that from me? When you're high, you keep it from everyone.
Not me.
Never me.
I'm the one person.
Okay.
I'm the one person.
Always.
Okay.
I'm the one person, Matthew.
I love you.
Wait.
We can't do this while you're running the show.
- Why not? - Because you said so.
You can't be the boss and be with me.
I think I may have been wrong.
- What? - I think I was wrong.
No, I don't understand those words coming from your mouth.
Say them again.
- Don't be a wise-ass.
- I'm paid to be a wise-ass.
Say it again.
- I think I was wrong.
- You think? - I may have been wrong.
- You're getting there.
- Herb? - Yeah? Do you have any problem if I go out with Harriet? Huh? All right.
Dylan, Alex, do you have any problem with Harry and me being together? - Nope.
- No.
Samantha, do you have any problem if I date a cast member? - Is it me? - No.
- Then no.
- Jeannie? Can I still sleep with you? - No.
- No.
Then, Andy, it is your lucky day.
- What'd I do? - You get to sleep with Jeannie.
- All right.
- There it is.
Any reason you couldn't have done that nine months ago? Hm.
Here we go.
Everybody gets a cigar! Tommy, have a cigar, I got a daughter.
That's fantastic, man.
I got a brother.
Well, then, have two cigars.
- Lucy, honey, stop crying, it's over.
I'm not crying.
- What? - She said she's not crying.
- I was calm throughout the whole ordeal.
- "I was calm throughout the whole ordeal.
" - All right.
Look - I've given up my rule.
And Harry and I are gonna be together.
I'm sure that comes as a pretty big shock to everyone.
I'm going to the airport, I'm going to Germany.
- You're excused.
- Can I go with him? - Can I go with him? - No.
- Danny.
- No.
Enough.
We did a good show tonight, but we can do better.
We can do better.
So we'll start again on Monday with the full writing staff, Lucy.
This was a hell of a night.
Everybody go home, get some sleep.
Be healthy.
- I will see you on Monday.
Good night.
- Good night, everybody.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Hey, I'm all for it, but not in front of me, okay? I'm gonna go grab some stuff in my dressing room.
Mazel tov.
Gesundheit.
Unbelievable.
- What? - Everything.
You think you and Harriet will stay together this time? Till we break up again.
But at least we'll always come back.
One of these days, you might wanna try the whole process under the same roof with less time between makeup scenes.
One of these days.
Thanks for keeping everyone together tonight.
- I'm going back to the hospital.
- Okay.
- Where you going? - My office.
- Go home.
- No.
- Matt, go home.
- I'm feeling good.
You gotta go to sleep.
- You're not going to sleep.
- I'm a father.
Are you gonna be holding that over my head till I'm a father? Just go home.
No, if we'll do a better show next week, I'm gonna need a head start.
- All right.
- All right.
Hey, Matthew, don't take this the wrong way but I love you.
- Okay.
- Did you take it the wrong way? I took it to mean that you're gay and you want me.
Good.
I love you too, brother.
Okay.
This is true.
I'm gonna make a friend out of you yet.