Foreign Exchange (2004) s01e23 Episode Script

1
(upbeat music)
(bike revving)
- That's it, you're doing fine.
Flip down a gear.
That's it!
Okay, take a round again.
All right, go slowly now,
the breaks aren't the best.
Well done, stay upright.
Just swerving through the corner.
Right, tuck down, tuck down!
You're going too fast!
Watch the breaks.
Be careful of the breaks,
they don't work very well.
Okay, take a round again.
Don't fall, don't damage the bike!
That's it, watch the corner.
- There is something about motorbikes.
I mean, even that loser Brett
looks kinda cool on one.
- Brett's an idiot.
He wouldn't look cool if
he was encased in ice.
- Oh, come on, Martin.
You've got to admit that's
a pretty classy bike.
- It's ancient.
My dad's buying me a real bike.
A Harley.
- You, on a Harley?
- What's wrong with that?
- Well, don't you have to be pretty good
to control one of those?
- Don't you think I can ride a motorbike?
- Well, do Harley Davidson's
have training wheels?
(bike engine roaring)
- Seamus, we have
students trying to study.
- Oh, sorry, Miss Murphy.
She doesn't have the right
muffler, Miss Murphy,
and as today is my day off,
I'm going to look for one.
- Thank you, Seamus.
- Yeah, you'd better get
a new petro cap, too.
- [Seamus] (laughs) I'd be lucky.
Come on, let's get this back to the shed.
(gravel crunching)
(mysterious music)
(gravel crunching)
(bike revving)
(bike engine roaring)
- Whoa, ah!
Oh!
(mud squelching)
(dramatic music)
(grunting)
- [Policeman] Oi, you
all right there, son?
- Yeah, thanks.
Can you give me to get it out?
(grunting)
- Yeah, how long have
you'd have your license?
- Me, I don't have one.
(intense music)
But, but I wasn't the one driving it.
(intense music)
But I wasn't, honest, Miss Murphy!
- I'm going to have to suspend you.
- But--
- I'm sorry, Brett,
but you'll just have to
stay off the school grounds
until this is cleared up.
- I didn't take it, I swear.
I was working when it was stolen.
- I understand this young
man is employed here.
- That's right, he
helps out our caretaker.
- And he's over here from Australia.
- Yes, on work experience.
- Work experience.
I'm gonna have to see your passport, then.
- I don't have it on me.
I'd have to go back home.
- Yeah, okay, I'll give you a lift.
- Oh no, no, no, it's okay.
It's just across the field.
It's quicker on foot.
- And I'm supposed to trust you, am I?
- He's always been very reliable, Guard.
- Very well.
If Miss Murphy's vouching for
you, I suppose it'll be okay.
Go and get your passport
and bring it down to us at the station.
- Yes, sir.
(moody music)
(door creaking)
- Well, what did the police want?
- Someone stole Seamus'
bike and crashed it.
They think it was me.
- Did you?
- No, of course not.
- Oh.
Well, that's terrible.
- If you need a lawyer,
my father knows several.
Just let me know.
- The police want to see my passport,
so I have to go home and get it.
- [Hannah] Well, I'll go with you.
- What was that about?
- Ah, what?
- You're never nice to Brett.
- (laughs) Even losers need
a hand sometimes (laughs).
- Amazing!
So what time are we going to the movies?
- Oh, I can't.
I'm sorry
- You're standing me up?
- No, something's come up.
We'll go next week, okay?
My treat.
Sorry!
(dramatic music)
- I can't show them my passport.
I don't have one.
- Well, can't you get one?
- It'll take too long,
and besides, they'd want to know
how I got to the country
in the first place.
And even if I could explain,
I still can't prove that
I wasn't riding the bike.
- So, um,
what're you gonna do?
- There's only one thing to do.
- What?
- I'll have to stay in Australia.
- For good?
- What other choice is there?
If I show my face around
here again I'll be arrested.
- But, um,
the police will forget about you.
Just give it time.
- Yeah, but what about Miss Murphy?
(emotional music)
- Look, there must be something we can do.
I mean, this isn't fair.
You didn't do it.
- I can't see what.
Anyway, you can still come
and visit me in Australia.
(rocks scraping)
(electronic tinkling)
I'm solved.
I'll leave my suitcase.
See you in Perth.
(electronic tinkling)
(emotional music)
(knocking)
- Brett!
(knocking)
Brett, get out here!
(emotional music)
About time!
What were you doing?
Dad wants us to move some junk.
(footsteps tapping)
(banging)
- Ah, the council won't
let us dump that much.
You'll have to put some back.
- No way!
- No, we're rented, fellas, sorry.
- We'll just put in someone else's pile.
- We can't do that.
- Why not?
It all ends up at the tip anyway.
(car engine rattling)
- Hey, you got a good one there.
- Sorry?
- That old TV.
They make great aquariums.
- Yeah, right (laughs).
Didn't think of that.
- Very well.
Give you 10 bucks for it.
- Deal.
- That wasn't yours to sell.
- They put it out here!
If it's on the street, it's free.
- But you made him pay for it!
- One man's trash is
another man's treasure.
Look at all this stuff.
It's a gold mine!
They throw it away
and I make a fortune!
Come on, give me a hand
with some of the stuff.
- No way.
- All right, I'll make you a partner.
10%, all right?
- Wayne, I'm not taking part
in one of your stupid schemes.
- You'll regret it.
- Regret what?
- Meri (laughs), my sweet little sister.
(playful music)
(upbeat music)
(banging)
(students chattering)
- There is no way that Brett is guilty.
We have to do something.
- Like what?
Like find out who really stole that bike.
What's your problem?
- Martin!
We had a date.
And he stood me up.
- Martin stood you up?
- I can't believe it either!
You know, he's been acting odd.
All morning.
He was even being nice to Brett.
- He was being nice to Brett, wasn't he?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, after calling
him an idiot this morning.
- Think he's a guilty conscience?
- Well, I don't know now
if Martin has a conscience.
- Maybe we need to have
another chat with him.
(footsteps tapping)
(grunting)
- What's going on?
Just what do you think you're doing?
- So, have you got something
you want to get off your chest, huh?
- What?
- Living with guilt can
eat you up inside, Martin.
- What guilt?
What're you talking about?
- Seamus' bike.
We know you took it!
- You're off your heads.
- You know, if you confess now,
we'll tell Miss Murphy you
felt really bad about it.
- (laughs) Sorry, I can't
confess to something I didn't do.
- Oh (laughs) he didn't do.
Well, what if we make you?
- And how are you going
to make me, four eyes?
Bore me to death?
You two should be more
careful in future, you know.
Otherwise my father's lawyers
will sue you for slander!
(dramatic music)
- He's guilty and I know it.
- Maybe, we still haven't
got any evidence, have we?
(reflective guitar music)
- Cormac as bad cop?
- Didn't work.
- Nah, really?
- We're gonna check out the crime scene,
you know, see if we can get
any hard evidence on Martin.
- You really think he did it?
- I don't know.
I'm sure he knows something.
He's too cool for his own good.
- Lying little skid mark.
Just wait till I get my hands on him.
- Yeah, you won't be able to.
He's safe in Ireland
and you're here.
- Yeah.
- [Meredith] Brett!
- What?
- Wayne and I need to
borrow your video camera.
- What for?
- We just do, that's all!
- Well him up there I'll be up in a sec.
How 'bout I come back tomorrow
and give you guys a hand?
- No.
Cormac and I'll get him.
Trust me.
(soft guitar music)
- Desire a didgeridoo
with double doohickies for your digits?
We have it!
- Why are you working for Wayne?
- He's paying me and I was bored.
- Yeah, you had your chance,
loser.
- Wild Wayne's wide world
of the weird and the
wonderful has everything.
But don't listen to me,
listen to one of my many
satisfied customers.
- I needed this rare spatula
to complete my collection
of cooking utensils from around the world,
and now, thanks to Wild Wayne, I have it!
- Remember, at Wild Wayne's,
let us give it to you.
(phone ringing)
(laughs) What do you think?
- It'll never work.
- Wild Wayne's Wild
World, Waynette speaking.
Yes, we have it!
- Still have an opening for
a store man if you want it.
(upbeat music)
- So, what kind of evidence
are you looking for?
- Well if I knew that, we
wouldn't need to look for it.
- Well, it's pretty
hopeless, if you ask me.
- Maybe, maybe.
Hey, what did I tell you?
A footprint!
- There's millions of footprints here.
- Yes, yes,
but this is the only one
leading into the bushes.
Look, there's a logo!
Made in Australia.
Aw, it's Brett's.
(upbeat music)
(waves splashing)
- Yeah, Harry?
Yeah, hi (laughs).
You're breaking, yeah,
(phone ringing)
yeah, put me down for 12.
- Wild Wayne's, please hold.
- No, no, just the lot,
yeah, the whole lot, yeah?
- Mum's gonna freak when she sees this.
Did you ask her?
- Yeah, Harry? (laughs)
You've got yourself a deal.
So when can you get them delivered?
- Mm-hm, that'll be $10,
and I need your name.
- (laughs) Harry, my man.
(laughs) You're the man, yeah you are.
Yeah, just hold on.
- Why can't I have the petrol cap?
- 10 bucks and it's yours.
- I don't have 10 bucks.
- Well then, you don't
have the cap, either.
Yeah, sorry, Harry?
- What is this?
- Hey, that's my safari suit!
- Um, gotta go, Harry, ciao.
Hi Jackie, Dad.
I know this looks a little odd.
- Odd, it looks like a
rubbish truck's exploded
in front of my restaurant.
- Yeah, and monkeys
rearranged the wreckage.
- But it's my new business!
I've told you all about it.
- No, you didn't.
- No, I'm sure I did,
I told Meredith to send you a memo.
- Excuse me, how much is this?
- It's not for sale!
- This'll all be gone in
a couple of days, Jackie.
Look, I promise.
- No, it'll be gone a
lot sooner than that.
- Wayne, what is this?
- It's my business.
(knocking)
- Brett, mate, how
would you like your room
to become a true bargain basement?
- What'd you mean?
- I need somewhere to put my stock.
- No way!
- Will this change your mind?
(upbeat music)
(birds singing)
- Martin, what are you doing?
- I'm just catching up on some laundry.
- You canceled a date
with me to do laundry?
- It was piling up.
Really.
- But you never wash anything.
- Mum changed housemaids.
Again.
The new one's hopeless, totally.
- How did you get all
that mud on your trousers?
- Uh, like I said, she's hopeless.
- Are you feeling all right?
- What'd you mean?
- You seem to be acting
a bit strange lately.
- I'm fine!
I've never felt better.
- All right then.
Enjoy your laundry.
(tense music)
(birds singing)
(upbeat music)
(waves crashing)
(electronic tinkling)
- Brett?
- [Brett] I'm over here.
- What's going on?
What's all this?
- Wayne's junk.
- Tell me you got something on Martin
so I can get away from all this.
- No proof.
At least not yet, anyway.
- I can't believe he's
going to get away with it!
- No, he won't.
We'll think of something.
- What?
It's just not fair.
I've been pushed out of
Ireland by a rich kid
who wanted a joy ride.
- I'd better go.
I'll see you soon, okay?
(mellow guitar music)
Bye.
(mellow guitar music)
- Well, I'm not giving up without a fight.
- What if someone sees you?
- We'll have to make sure they don't.
(guitar music)
(birds singing)
(footsteps tapping)
(grunting)
- Don't you guys give up?
What is the big deal this time?
- Me.
- Brett!
What are you doing here?
- I've come to see you, Martin.
- If the cops spot you, you're
in deep trouble, you know.
- Yeah, it's funny that,
considering you're the one they're after.
- Now Martin, Brett
thinks you stole the bike
but I'm not so sure.
- Oh no, no, no, no,
I know he stole the bike.
And I think it's time the little weasel
learnt to do the right thing.
- You better not do anything.
- Don't be too hard on him, Brett.
He can't help being a wimp.
- Excuse me?
- Well, you've never ridden
anything bigger than a tricycle.
- [Martin] I have!
- No, no, no, she's right.
I don't think a wimp like him
would have the courage
to ride a motorcycle.
All those gears and
levers would be too much
for your puny little brain!
- I know what you're trying to do!
- I don't know anything.
- You're trying to get me angry enough
so that I'll say something stupid
and give myself away.
Well, it's not gonna happen.
- Why would we want to do that?
When we can prove that you stole the bike.
- Oh yeah, how?
- We'll say we found this in your room.
- That doesn't prove anything.
- It's off Seamus' bike.
- That's not true.
Seamus' bike didn't have a petrol cap.
- And how would you know that, Martin?
- Unless you were the one who stole it.
- So what if I did steal it?
You'll never make it stick.
It's my word against yours.
(rustling)
(grunting)
- Digital recorders are really great.
I got every word crystal clear.
- You!
Scumbags!
(upbeat music)
- Wayne!
- [Wayne] Yep, we have four.
- Wayne!
- Gotta go, yep, gotta go.
Jackie, what can I do for you today?
- I told you to get rid of this junk,
not just move it inside.
- This isn't just junk.
This is my ticket to the big time.
Executive diaries.
- I don't care.
I want it out of here.
- Look, I know this a
bit of inconvenience,
but here's a free sample,
with Wild Wayne's compliments.
Feel the quality.
The cover's genuine artificial leather.
With gold lettering.
- It's last year's.
- Well, yeah, that's
why I got them so cheap,
but just change the year, easy fix,
and I'm gonna make a fortune!
- The dates and the days of
the week are all wrong too.
You're gonna change those as well?
Get them out of here before
the rubbish collection's over.
- Jackie! (sighs)
(upbeat music)
(banging)
(emotional music)
(glass smashing)
Yes!
- Wayne, I want my pay.
- Oh, you're kidding, right?
I'm bankrupt!
- Oh yeah, well what's this, then?
- Hey, give it back!
- Talk to my union!
- Oh, what?
The federation of muddy
grumpy little sisters!
Parasite!
- [Martin] You're never
gonna make it stick.
It's my word against yours.
(beeping)
- I am extremely
disappointed in you, Martin.
You realize I'll have to tell your father?
- What, no!
Just send me to jail!
- (sighs) Brett, I'm
sorry for doubting you.
I'll phone the guards and
tell them what's happened.
- Thanks, Miss Murphy.
- Can I go too?
- You are going to come outside
and apologize to Seamus,
after you have apologized to Brett.
- Both of them?
- Right now!
(bike engine revving)
- Look, it's all cleaned up.
- I thought you were getting a muffler.
- I couldn't find the right one,
but look what the leprechauns left me!
(laughing)
- Martin!
- I, (yawn), I'm sorry about
all the trouble I've caused.
- Sorry, what was that?
- I'm sorry.
- What, look, I can't hear you.
- I'm sorry!
(laughing)
- See, now, Martin, that
wasn't so hard, was it?
(laughing)
(upbeat music)
(electronic whooshing)