Harvey Beaks (2015) s01e25 Episode Script

1 [cheerful music.]
# Harvey # # Harvey # # Harvey # Dad, honestly, one of the best tapas meals I've had in my life.
- Easily in my top five.
- My food tasted extra special because I used the plate that Harvey decorated.
- It's my favorite.
- So talented.
All right, gang.
Let's form the dishwashing train.
- I'll be the captain.
- And I'll be the caboose.
Ugh! Um, how about we just take one dish at a time? Yeah, just to be safe.
Wait, I'm just gonna run for the sink! Ah! Ah! Ahh! There.
All done.
[dramatic music.]
[glass shattering.]
Oh, dear.
[dramatic music.]
- I I'm sorry! - Hey, it's okay, sweetie.
Accidents happen.
But I should have listened to you guys.
I defied you! I broke a sacred trust! What's my punishment gonna be? Well, I don't think a punishment is necessary, but you know what is necessary? - A hug.
- And then a time-out? Nope.
Just more hugs.
It's my favorite.
My favorite.
[glass shattering.]
Ohh! Just think of something peaceful, like a waterfall.
[dramatic music.]
[plates shattering.]
[Music.]
[groaning.]
[plate shattering.]
No! You broke me, Harvey.
Why'd you break me? I thought you loved me.
Why, Harvey? Why? Ahh! Mom? Dad? I can't go to sleep.
- I don't want to go to the fair.
- Ooh, waterslide.
You guys have to punish me so I'll stop thinking about that plate.
[snoring.]
Okay.
Uh Go Go clean the living room, Madame.
Okay, okay.
What else? Shh.
Come here.
I want to touch your face.
Oh, my.
Irving, look.
- It's so clean! - We've been visited by elves! - Harvey, did you do all this? - Yep.
I fulfilled your punishment.
- Remember? - Wait, we punished him? Oh, boy.
We must have been parenting in our sleep again.
Well, um, I hope you learned a lesson.
I sure did, and now I have a clear conscience.
- Harvey! - Huh? You broke me.
You broke me.
Oh, no.
I didn't do enough.
I still feel guilty! You're really beating yourself up over this, huh? Nobody is upset.
Everything is fine, really.
You can say that, but in my heart of hearts, I know I need to be punished for what I did.
[light, jaunty music.]
[laughter.]
Everyone stay still.
I'm gonna get you! Ahh! Wait, what were the rules of this game again? Were we playing a game? I thought Princess had just snapped.
I got to go.
I have groceries.
- Ugh! - Ah! This is a special day.
Incoming! Ugh! Ow.
I need your help! What kind of punishments do you guys get - when you do something bad? - What's a punishment? How come I don't have one? Gimme! Doesn't your dad ever discipline you? What? No.
My dad loves me.
I guess a punishment is something your parents make you do even though you hate it.
Oh, never mind.
I know what that is.
I get punished every day by being around you basic people.
Pose! Elegance.
- Guys, I really messed up.
- Whatever you need, we got you.
- Yeah.
We'll all help.
- Oh, dude.
I'm, like, the master of punishments.
Guys, I just stole this bucket of shrimp.
Here, let me show you.
When Foo misbehaves, I make him wear stuffy, formal clothes tucked in and buttoned all the way up.
- Come on out, Foo.
- I don't want to! Well, you should have thought about that before you decided to act like a little criminal.
Now, get your butt out here, young man.
That's right.
What have we learned about taking stuff that doesn't belong to us? - Bleh.
- Don't you give me lip, mister.
Go on, Harvey.
Give it a try.
Hm.
Meh.
What is this shirt even made of? Polyester? I think I'm getting a rash.
But, you know what? I deserve this.
I must make amends for my wrongdoing.
Psst! Hey! Ahh! This isn't working! I got to go.
If you're looking for a punishment, my mom is an expert.
When I get in trouble, my mom makes me write all my failures on paper, and then I add it to the burden ball.
Wow, Claire.
That's huge.
Yeah.
These are all from this morning.
Mom's right; I should have my own law firm by now.
I'm already eight.
And then do we walk around until we're ashamed? I used to do that, but now I just sit.
Want some crackers? Hey! Ahh! No, thanks.
I need to try something else.
Okay.
Bye, Harvey-ee! Oh, well.
[crunching.]
When I get in trouble, mom says I can't eat alone in my room, the way I like.
Ahh! [plop.]
[indistinct chatter.]
She makes me eat with all my siblings.
Wow.
Sure are lively.
- Savages.
- Look, Harvey.
I'm a french fry vampire.
Ugh, you do that joke every time, Wade.
Every time! [shatters.]
Why'd you break me, Harvey? [gasps.]
Hey, thanks for helping me, Dade, but I better go now.
- Okay, let me walk you out.
- Bye, Harvey.
Don't say good-bye to my friends! I block you! I block your good-bye.
[groans.]
I have blood on my hands.
Plate blood.
- Hi.
- Ahh! Ugh! I'm still here.
[groans.]
None of the punishments have been strong enough to rehabilitate me.
How am I supposed to fit into society when I'm still a hardened criminal? No one should ever have to see my face again.
Wait a minute.
That's it! Harvey! Dinner's ready, sweetie! Harvey? Huh? Oh, Irving, come look.
I think Harvey has made something special for us.
Harvey: Harvey Beaks presents "The Confession.
" We all remember what I did, the nightmare we all lived through.
The day I broke the plate.
Very artistic.
I've tried every punishment in the book, but nothing feels severe enough except for one more thing.
I have to ban myself from the family.
Forever.
- Man, these angles.
- Wait, what did he say? I've packed all I need: a compass, some yummy applesauce, and a book of brain teasers.
I'll be fine.
As you're watching this, I'm already making my way into the wilds of Thornbark.
Don't follow me.
Good-bye.
Cut! Okay, let's see.
How do I is this the button? [flute music.]
- Oh, no.
- This is terrible! He taped over his recital.
- We have to go after him.
- Oh, right.
[music.]
Ow! Ugh! This is pokey.
Mom and Dad must be worried.
Maybe I've learned my lesson.
What's the harm in turning back home now? Here lies Harvey Beaks.
He broke a plate once.
He was gonna punish himself by living in Thornbark, but then he chickened out and he died guilty.
Agh, shame! - Yah! - Blast it with lasers! [struggles.]
[laser beams firing.]
[dramatic music.]
No! No more shortcuts.
The only way to redeem myself is to go even deeper.
[panting.]
Miriam, I think we're close.
Look, it's Harvey's bindle.
Oh, jeez.
I hope he's okay.
He's right here.
I found him! Oh, buddy, thank goodness you're safe.
- Irving, that's not our son.
- Oh, okay.
Fair enough.
- That's on me.
Honest mistake.
- I think he went this way.
Ugh! Ow.
Ow.
Ugh.
Oh, there you are.
[gasps.]
I told you not to follow me! - This is my punishment! - Sweetie, this is really excessive.
[quick breathing.]
[music.]
[grunts.]
[screams.]
Ugh! No! [screams.]
[both panting.]
We should put him in sports.
[grunting.]
Huh? [splat.]
Ah! Lemon plant! [panting.]
[struggling.]
Why are you doing this? Is this about the plate? [yelling.]
Everything is about the plate! I tried to make up for it, but I still feel bad.
I'll climb to the top of this tree, then I'll learn my lesson.
Sweetie, listen to me.
You need to do something much harder than that.
You need to forgive yourself.
- Forgive myself? - People make mistakes.
You just have to live with it and let it go.
Just let it go.
What's up, man? Sorry, plate.
I never meant to smash you to bits.
But I have to move on with my life now.
I promise, I'll never forget you or what you've taught me.
Good-bye! Bye, Harvey! You take care of yourself.
Be good, Harvey.
Bye! [chimes.]
Um, sweetie? And if this one breaks, it's no big deal, okay? Oh, this one won't break.
Thanks for helping me set this up, guys.
You're welcome.
Hey! # Today's amazing # # Today is special # # Today is Arbor Day # Makes my little heart full Arbor Day What's it all about? Well, [chuckles.]
if you really want to know Then come with me And let's find out A long time ago All the spirits of the trees # Were trapped inside a rock # By a mean old king and queen # But then one day # Princess Acornelia came # She helped them escape # # So each year we celebrate # And we sing and we dance And we'll prance through the streets Sharing treats, hugging trees Filled with glee Can't you see That Arbor Day is the best? So much magic and zest I just love how it feels I'm so glad that it's real [lighthearted music.]
There.
Gorgeous.
- That's a cool color scheme, Piri.
- Thank you, Harvey.
Although, it's not as magnificent as your Arbor Day flower crown.
My mom hot-glued it for me.
It's pretty adorable.
Excuse me, are you responsible for all the glitter happening here? You know, it's impossible to get out, and Carol's gonna have a fit.
[gasps.]
Mr.
Bartleburt! Happy Arbor Day, sir.
As a tree spirit, you must be so excited for this sacred day.
Eh I know what'll get you into the holiday spirit: the story of Arbor Day.
It's so magical.
How the heroic Princess Acornelia came to the tree spirits' rescue.
I love stories about strong women.
- Who doesn't? - All the tree spirits are trapped in a rock for 1,000 years? What? You know, this book isn't very accurate, I got to say.
Huh? What do you mean? I mean, this isn't even anything close to what the rock even looked like.
I should know.
I was there.
[gasps.]
You were?! Mr.
Bartleburt, you have to tell me everything that happened! Oh, my gosh.
I have the best idea! What if we made a movie about the history of Arbor Day? - We could direct it together.
- Um, no.
[laughs.]
Oh, please? Mr.
Bartleburt, we have to share your story! Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty please? Aw, how can you say no to her? She's adorable.
[chiming.]
All right.
Stop it.
- I'll I'll do it.
I'll tell it.
- Yay! - Yeah, so, um, here it is.
- [gasps.]
Oh, my gosh.
This is the rock where you and your people were forced to live all those years.
Oh, no, no, no.
That's it over there.
The Rock Apartment Complex? Ha-ha, you didn't think we were trapped in an actual rock did you? I mean, how would that even work? Because, you know, science.
So how are we doing this? You're gonna act it out, and I talk? - Or what? - Yes! My friends and I are here to help.
We're ready to act our butts off, sir.
Okay, well, you won't really need all these costumes.
Oh, really? You didn't wear costumes? - What did you wear? - Oh, I don't know.
Cardigans, turtlenecks, slacks anything beige, really.
There we go.
That's more accurate.
Okay, everyone.
Our story starts off with our heroes, the tree spirits, wandering in search of a new home.
[bushes rustle.]
Oh, no.
Our homes were ravaged by Vikings! We need to find a new one.
I'll scout ahead and fight off any enemies with my karate skills.
Here, take this magic crystal to protect you.
I put our hopes and dreams in it.
Oh, my gosh.
This is beautiful.
What do you think? Oh, you know, I have to say it was a bit far-fetched.
We were basically just looking for a new apartment since my mother-in-law kicked us out.
She wasn't a Viking, but she sure was beastly.
Um, o-okay.
We'll make those adjustments and keep going.
Wow, so glad we have this new apartment.
Finally, a place where we can watch the golfing channel - and be happy.
- Yeah, right.
Better watch out, 'cause this diva queen is coming, and you're all ugly.
But not as ugly as me, the awful king.
All: We're doomed! [groans.]
Sorry.
It's incorrect again.
I mean, they weren't royalty.
They were just our landlords.
As if! That's a load of bull-oney! Now, now.
Settle down, Princess.
This is the real, perfect story of Arbor Day.
Bartleburt knows what happened, so let's trust him.
[all sigh.]
Don't worry, guys.
At least there's still Acornelia.
- Oh, my! Who will save us? - I will! Princess Acornelia! Ha! Fear not, good spirits of the trees, for I, with my trusty magic sword of goodness, have come to liberate you.
Okay, you know, that was good.
Here's the thing, though.
She wasn't the princess.
She was our on-site manager.
Her name wasn't Acornelia.
It was just Cornelia.
Everyone just loves acorn puns around here.
But, sh-she was magical, wa-wasn't she? No.
No magic.
Eh, well, except her ambrosia salad.
Now, that stuff is magical.
Oh If you don't mind, I think I'll need to go take a break.
Okay, well, I guess we'll just keep going then.
Arbor Day What's it all about? Arbor Day I guess I just found out Arbor Day Nothing special Turns out Arbor Day Isn't even real [thumping.]
[paper tearing.]
All right.
So in this scene, Harvey, you're trying to read the newspaper, but Rooter, next door well, he's got his TV turned on way too loud, so then Claire you're at the kitchen table and you're playing sudoku.
Um, Mr.
Bartleburt? I think it's time for me to go home, and also, I don't like this.
Yeah, this isn't glamour! This isn't fashion! I'm out of here.
Yeah, I don't know.
I got to go.
You guys want to quit before the lease termination scene? Sorry, Mr.
Bartleburt.
I don't think this turned out as fun as everyone thought it would be.
But I tried to make it as accurate as I could.
Well, yeah I actually don't even know what a lease is, or a landlord, and I don't give a hoot, because I'm nine years old.
I guess Piri Piri's version of the story just felt more like a celebration.
Well happy Arbor Day, Mr.
Bartleburt.
[somber music.]
[sighs.]
Piri, Piri? Rise, my child.
Rise from this darkness.
You have a visitor.
Please, Mother.
I don't feel up to seeing anyone right now.
Oh? Not even for Princess Acornelia? Oh, hey.
Hello, there.
Mr.
Bartleburt, you look very pretty, but you are not Princess Acornelia.
Uh, but of course I am with my magic sword, and the beautiful hair, and all that.
Acornelia didn't have any of those things.
She was just your kindly, on-site manager.
None of it's real.
You know, Piri, even if your version of Arbor Day isn't, um, necessarily accurate, that doesn't mean it's not meaningful.
The way I celebrate Arbor Day is to remember all the facts, but the way you celebrate, with all your songs and dances well, it makes everybody happy, and I'd say, that's pretty magical.
Piri? Piri, could you say something? I'm starting to feel a little uncomfortable.
[crying.]
Do you really mean it? Do you really think I make Arbor Day magical? [sighs.]
Yeah, I really do.
Oh, I almost forgot [tears bubbling.]
Thank you, Mr.
Bartleburt.
That's all right.
You're welcome.
What do you say, let's make that movie the real version of Arbor Day with a little touch of Piri Piri magic? I'd like that very much, but you have to be Princess Acornelia, because you look amazing in that costume! I do look pretty good, huh? There's no escape for you losers.
You're legally bound by this contract.
[evil laughter.]
Oh, no! What are we, the tree spirits, going to do? Hark! I hear salvation approaching.
Yes, it is I, Magic Princess Acornelia, who is also your brave and kind on-site manager.
Oh, thank you, beautiful Acornelia! Now all of the tree spirits can go and live in peace.
Yup.
Happy Arbor Day, everyone.
All: Happy Arbor Day!