Randall Hopkirk (Deceased) (1969) s01e26 Episode Script

- Watch it, baby.
- Eh? You can smile when they read the will.
Aren't they beautiful? - They're lovely.
- I bought some for Marty.
What about a buttonhole? It might impress the client.
- You don't have a buttonhole.
- Oh, well, I'll wear it in my teeth.
Here, I shall pin it on.
There.
How's that? Delightful.
You know, Jeannie, I've really got to get this job.
We do need it.
Yes, I know we do.
- Good luck.
- Thanks.
Where are you going? - To lunch.
- Oh.
Bon appetit.
Gracias.
Marty! Marty! I thought so.
Put it back.
I'm not having my Jeannie giving you flowers.
- You're jealous.
- Jealous?! Of course I'm jealous.
That's all that's left between us.
Buy your own buttonholes.
I can't afford the time.
Someone's got to look after the business.
I'm glad you brought that up, Jeff.
I came to ask you a favour.
- Well, Marty, anything I can do.
- For a neighbour of mine, Caroline Seaton.
- Caroline Seaton? That name rings a bell.
- It would.
There's a story in your newspaper.
Oh I remember.
The girl who got killed on the track.
Terrible smash.
Neighbour? She moved in next door this morning.
- You've left it a bit late to help her, haven't you? - It's right up your street.
An investigation.
- And who pays? - A favour, Jeff.
It's all right for you.
You don't have to eat.
Caroline was cheated the same way I was.
- Murder? - Yeah.
I'm certain.
- It's a job for the police.
- They don't know about it.
- Well, give me the evidence.
- I haven't got any.
That's where you come in.
- I'm sorry.
- You won't help? I can't afford to.
Anyway, I've got to meet a client down in - Gouldhurst.
- Gouldhurst? Well, that's near Stonehurst.
That's where Caroline lived.
- I can't afford to work for nothing, Marty.
- Materialist! Aren't we all? Present company excepted.
Anyway, I've got to keep this appointment.
There are times, Marty, when I think you never grew up.
She was a nice-looking kid.
Yes, I I noticed you thought so.
It's a pity she had to go.
We'd no choice.
No.
If she'd lived, we'd have lost the lot.
Mr.
Brooks, I'm really very sorry to keep you waiting.
Please don't apologise.
You have my deepest sympathy.
Such a tragedy, happening so soon after your reunion.
- Yes.
- And you, too, my dear.
- Thank you.
- I reckon you could use a drink, eh, Cynthia? Er, Mrs.
Evans! Can I get you a snort, Mr.
Brooks? A sherry, perhaps.
I won't prolong the business.
The will is quite short.
Er, a brandy for Mrs.
Seaton, a sherry for Mr.
Brooks, and I'll have a whisky.
Very well.
Strange, isn't it? Caroline had an appointment with me - the day after the accident.
- Oh, yeah? She said it was important.
Have you any idea what she wanted, Mr.
Seaton? No.
Wait a minute.
She did er ask me about her investments.
- So I told her to talk to you.
- Oh, yes, that's evidently what it was.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Don't go, Mrs.
Evans.
You're mentioned in the will.
Now, shall we er sit? Yeah.
Thank you, sir.
This is the last will - and testament of Caroline.
- Skip the preliminaries, eh? If you prefer.
Yeah.
There is a bequest of 500 pounds to Mrs.
Evans for faithful service.
Er The rest of the entire estate goes to you.
I see.
Well, that seems straightforward enough.
How long will it take to get it settled? Well, we might be able to rush it through in six to eight weeks.
Great.
- Er, can you recommend a good estate agent? - Estate agent? Surely you don't propose to sell the house? Well, I guess so.
I mean, there's nothing to keep us here now.
My wife and I are going to go back to Australia.
- Well, thanks a lot, Mr.
Brooks.
- Not at all.
If you'll let me have your account, I'll let you have a cheque as soon as possible.
Yes, of course.
Good day to you.
Good day.
See what's the matter with those darned dogs, will you? What was she worth? Make it nearly Then there's what the old boy left you.
Yeah.
At a rough check, counting the house, I reckon we stand to clear 120,000 pounds.
Afternoon.
- Did you hear it? - Yes, they're barking at you.
No, it's erm - Can I help you? - Well, I've lost my way.
Can you direct me to Gouldhurst? Sure.
I'll draw you a map.
- Thanks.
Sorry to trouble you.
- It's no trouble.
- Come in.
- Thank you.
Who's this? He was looking for Gouldhurst.
In the garden.
- I missed the road.
- Oh yeah? - I thought someone would be able.
- Hooper, check if he's alone.
Don't worry, I am.
- I don't get it.
- Who are you? - The name's Randall.
- What are you after? After? OK, search him.
Now, just a minute Can't see anyone else around.
Private eye.
Righto.
Who are you working for? Well, you're not going to believe this, but I'm looking for a job.
That's right.
I don't believe it.
Lock him up.
Now, look, you're making a big mistake.
I don't know who you are Out.
Marty.
I might have known.
Out.
- Do you think he's onto us? - It certainly looks like it.
What can we do? Well, we've murdered once.
We're in too deep to stop now.
Looks like our inquisitive friend will have to join Caroline.
Marty? Marty! I know you're here.
Too scared to show, eh? Well, listen.
You got me into this and you can get me out.
It's got to look like an accident.
Do you want us to fix his car? No.
The river.
Well, come on.
On your feet.
- Where to now? - To dinner.
- You're going to feed me, eh? - Yes.
To the fishes.
- OK? - What do we do with his car? Leave it there.
- I'll follow you.
- OK.
Jeff, wake up.
Wake up! They're going to murder you.
Jeff! Who's going to run the business if we're both dead? Let's go.
Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Look, you've got to help me.
There's a man in the water.
He's drowning.
Oh, no! Come on come on! Harder, harder! Pull him.
Get him out.
Come on, come on! Oh, that's better.
Well, now, tell me what happened.
Oh, well, I must have slipped and banged my head as I fell in.
You were lucky.
The fish weren't biting.
I nearly packed up half an hour earlier.
I'm glad you didn't.
There was a car on the bank.
RXD - 9967.
- Yeah.
That's mine.
They must have left it.
- They? - Oh, nothing.
I was talking to myself.
I'll pick it up on the way back.
I er - I don't know how to thank you.
- Don't try.
The name's Randall.
It's a bit wet but it'll dry out soon.
If there's ever anything I can do for you Oh, no, please, forget it.
- Private detective! - Yeah.
Unemployment benefit pays better, but this sounds more respectable.
Well, maybe there is something.
Well, what's up? Your wife run off? That I could handle.
No, I've been robbed.
Robbed? What of? - My identity.
- Identity? I need help.
Not as a favour, as a professional engagement.
Are you interested? Well, another drink would help me concentrate.
Sure.
Thanks.
Right, what's the problem? When I was 16, I had a row with my old man and went to Australia.
I bummed around for two years was completely out of touch.
Now, six months ago, the old man ran ads in the papers to try to find me.
I didn't hear about this till much later.
I came back got in touch with the solicitors to find that somebody claiming to be me had shown up four months before and been accepted.
You've got no documents? Stolen.
My place in Brisbane was cleaned out six months ago.
And your father doesn't recognise you? It was too late.
He'd planned a deathbed reunion and he snuffed it just after the impostor turned up.
Oh, hard luck.
What about relatives? Only the one sister, and she was a kid when I left here.
- You have seen the solicitor? - You bet.
There's a lot of money at stake.
I was the fourth Donald Seaton who turned up.
They kicked me out.
- Donald Seaton? - Yeah.
Have you any way - of proving your claim? - Maybe.
I thought if you could see my sister - Caroline? - That's right.
How do you know? - I've got bad news for you.
- Yeah? Caroline's dead.
Dead? Yeah, in a car smash.
She was buried this morning.
Haven't you seen the papers? Not for a week.
Since I came down here.
I thought if I stayed here near the house, I might Oh, forget it.
No point in wasting your time.
- I don't give up that easy.
- Don't think me callous.
- I didn't know Caroline at all.
- No.
I've got a personal score to settle on this one.
It was no accident.
My being in the river, I mean.
I was clobbered by Seaton's strong-arm men.
- That is the guy who claims to be Seaton.
- They tried to murder you? Like they murdered Caroline.
Murdered? I can't prove it.
But I will.
I don't understand.
Who are you working for? A friend of Caroline's asked me to look into it.
For a favour.
I left it in the library.
Back in a sec.
- Who are you? What are you doing here? - I'm a private detective.
Detective? You mean you're after him? - Should I be? - You should.
He's a murderer.
He's no more Miss Caroline's brother than I am.
- Is there any proof? - No, not yet.
But there must be papers somewhere here to show who he really is.
- And that's what you were looking for? - Yes.
Well, relax.
We're both on the same side.
- I'm working for the real Donald Seaton.
- I knew it.
Look, you can help, if you will.
Is there anyone who knew Donald - before he went away? - Well, um Dyson.
He was the handyman around here before Hooper came.
- Where do I get hold of him? - Mr.
Brooks the solicitor.
He arranged Dyson's pension.
I think Dyson has a farm somewhere hereabouts.
We found him last night, hanging around my house.
Well, he hasn't been here.
Oh, he won't.
But there could be others, so watch it, eh? If I catch anyone, it'll be the worse for them.
Or my name's not Joe Dyson.
Dyson? Yes.
I have his address.
But perhaps you'd be good enough to tell me why it is His cousin's died.
He's next of kin.
- Ah, lucky man! - There's not much money.
No? Well, he's been most generously treated by his former employer.
- Seaton? - Yes.
He set him up in a small farm.
Lynstead Acres.
You'll find it on the Elmstead Road.
Ooh, about seven miles out of town.
Dyson? Dyson! Get a shovel.
What beats me is how he got out of the river.
- Perhaps he didn't.
- What? Take a look.
Go on.
Dyson! - You - I don't understand.
It was Randall.
I followed him from Brooks' office.
If you killed Randall, where is he now, eh? And who killed Dyson? Jeff, where have you been? I just had the client on.
What happened? - I never got there.
- Yes, I know.
So she said.
- The job's cancelled.
- I was sidetracked.
- Well, how? - You wouldn't believe me if I told you.
- Have the police been yet? - Police? No.
Good.
We've got to work fast.
Look, go to Somerset House, check the records.
See if anyone's been enquiring about the pedigree of a Donald Seaton, age about 38, - born Stonehurst.
- But, Jeff Jeannie, we're in a hurry! - Well, what's wrong? - A murder.
I might have trouble proving I didn't do it.
Oh, boy! You really needed Marty.
- Eh? - To keep you out of trouble.
If only you knew.
I've told you before Jeff I don't want Jeannie involved.
What? - Seaton's a killer.
- And who got me involved? Jeff, there's no need for all that.
I've been beaten up, flung in a river, half-drowned.
Ah! But only half-drowned.
- You mean you got me out? - Yes.
I watch over you like a guardian angel.
Angel? You're presuming a lot.
You haven't been classified yet.
- Don't speak ill of the dead.
- But you won't stay dead.
- That's nice.
That's very nice, that is.
- Nice! It's a job for you, isn't it? There's money in it.
You can give Jeannie a raise.
A what? Someone's coming.
Come in.
And what do you want? To clear up our little misunderstanding.
- What with? A gun? - A cheque.
- You should have thought of that yesterday.
- We made a mistake.
- Yes, you should have put my feet in concrete.
- You've been misled.
The man you're working for is an impostor.
Now, by strange coincidence, he claims that my husband is the impostor.
- Right.
- I don't know what he's paying you but we're prepared to offer you double to drop the case.
If your husband's genuine, he has nothing to worry about.
Double what you're being paid.
Why should you care which one is Donald Seaton? I'm in it for the cash, you mean? - I wouldn't put it like that.
- But that's what you mean and that's where you make another mistake.
Money doesn't matter.
You can't get away with murder, madam.
So tell that to your old man.
Randall & Hopkirk.
I presume Hopkirk is the one with the brains? OK, Mrs.
Evans.
Mrs.
Evans! Mrs.
Evans! She's just gone down to the village, shopping.
Follow her.
I want to know where she goes.
What time is it? I don't know.
I pawned my watch.
- Well where's the clock? - I can't afford a clock.
I can hear a ticking.
- It's your imagination.
It's always ticking over.
- No, listen.
It seems to be coming from over here somewhere.
- Can you hear it? - Yeah.
What's this? The lady must have left her clock.
She was no lady.
And this is no clock.
It's a bomb! What are you worried about? It can't hurt you.
Oh, yeah, I was forgetting.
Come on, Jeff, come on.
Make it safe.
Jeannie will be back in a minute.
Stop jumping about, Marty.
You're making me nervous.
Answer the phone.
You know I can't.
- OK, OK, let it ring.
- Right.
No reply.
- Haven't you done it yet? - Nearly.
That's it.
- Are you sure it's safe now? - Yeah, but don't strike any matches.
The clock hasn't stopped.
It has now.
Hello.
Jeannie! No-one? Are you certain? Now it's engaged.
I'll try again in a minute.
- Is Jeannie all right? - Of course she's all right.
- I'm the one who's in trouble.
- Are you going back to Stonehurst? - You must be psychic.
- Well, will you take this with you? - If Jeannie comes back, she might play with it.
- Yeah, all right.
Don't worry, I'll get rid of it.
I'll see you around.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Ban the bomb! "Sir, would you mind telling me what you have in that parcel?" "Of course not, it's a bomb.
" There's no answer again.
Look.
Would you like me to give him a message? Well All right, you can give him that.
Mrs.
Evans.
Good work, Cyn.
That takes care of friend Randall.
Yes.
I didn't wait around to hear the bang.
I don't think he'll bother us any more.
- There is another problem.
- Oh? The old woman.
- Mrs.
Evans? - Yes.
She's onto us.
I reckon we're going to have to get rid of her as well.
- Sorry.
- Well, come in.
What happened? She went to a cottage at the other end of the village.
There was a man.
She gave him an envelope.
- What man was this? - If I'm not mistaken, it's him.
Donald.
- I'm sorry to bother you again.
- Is Randall back? - He won't be back.
- What? They've done something.
I don't know what, but I heard them.
What did they say? I tell you, I don't know any more.
But I want that letter back.
I don't want to be mixed up in this.
- But look - No buts.
I tell you, I want to get clear of this.
- Where is it? - All right, all right.
It's here.
I don't know who you are, but if you take my advice, you'll get out of here quick.
- I'm Donald Seaton.
- Huh! Mr.
Randall! I thought Look, I want a word with you.
- In private.
- It's all right.
This is Donald Seaton.
I said in private.
What is it? So that's your Donald Seaton, is it? Right.
Just you take a look at that.
Cabaret dancer Cynthia Ward, who today married Mr.
Donald Seaton - in a Brisbane registry office.
- Yeah.
You see, it's her all right.
So he must be the real Donald Seaton.
It's the one here who's the impostor.
Looks as though you're right.
Thank you for telling me.
I'm still sure they murdered Miss Caroline.
His own sister.
It's shocking.
Well, thanks again, Mrs.
Evans.
Bye-bye.
Mr.
Seaton.
- Has she gone? - Yeah.
What was it all about? This.
I think you'd better explain.
Cynthia! Well, this explains everything.
She's my wife.
Ex-wife, sweetie.
Out, Randall.
This is the end of the line.
Stick around.
I'll be back.
Where are we? Dyson's farm.
Nice and isolated.
Yell your head off and no-one will hear you.
- Why don't they just kill us? - That's Grant's job.
What about the well? - What well? - The old well at the farm.
It hasn't been used since they piped the water in.
Sounds just the place.
Take Grant back with you tonight and deal with it.
Right.
All because of that row with the old man.
Must have been some row.
What was it about? It was my fault, really.
I stole a car, sold it and spent the money.
It started as a joke, really.
- Did you get caught? - Yeah, I got three months.
The old man thought I'd disgraced him.
- You did three months? - Out in two for good behaviour.
- Went to Australia - So you've got a criminal record? Yeah, I suppose I have.
They're coming.
Get out! Get going! - Let's get the other one.
- Let's get rid of this one first.
Looking for a lift? Jeff? Jeff, are you all right? Great.
I love it here.
Keeps my feet cool.
Now, Jeff, there's no need for all that.
Marty, do something.
I'm trying, Jeff, I'm trying.
I've been thinking for hours.
- What have you come up with? - Nothing.
- Nothing.
- I can't see a way out, Jeff.
Well, find one! Jeff, it's a wishing well.
Well, I wish I was out of here.
See? It doesn't work.
Think of something else.
Hey, there's a wishing well here.
- Where? In the farm? - Yeah.
Well, then, - let's go and make a wish.
- Why not? Good news, Jeff.
Here you are, then.
What are you going to wish for? - Oh, no, you go first.
- All right, then.
I wish I was - a millionaire! - And I wish I was out of this perishing well! Where's Donald? Oh, he's locked up safe.
In the morning, we'll er drop him down the well with Randall.
It'll be company for him.
Hey where do you think you're going? I'm sorry Mr.
Seaton.
What's all this? I'm Detective Inspector Tate of New Scotland Yard.
I think you know why we're here.
Mr.
Brooks, - you're my solicitor.
Perhaps you'd better tell these men - I am the Seaton family solicitor.
Not yours.
Now, look Here he is, sir.
Found him locked in a room upstairs.
- You all right, Randall? - You bet.
It's the end of the line, Seaton, whoever you are.
- We know you're a phoney.
- I've got papers to prove who I am.
And we've got fingerprints.
And they can't be forged or stolen.
- Fingerprints? - We've got Donald Seaton's fingerprints on file.
So you've just got to give them your fingerprints to prove your identity.
I arrest you on a charge of All right, all right.
We'll sort all this out down at the station.
You're under arrest, the lot of you.
Dear me, dear me.
I'm most dreadfully sorry, Mr.
Seaton.
But your late father seemed satisfied that man was his son.
It's all right, Mr.
Brooks.
It'll all come out in the wash.
Jeff.
You! - We're still speaking, then? - Marty Don't be like that, Jeff.
If ever you get fed up with this business, we could make a fortune out of that wishing well.
Marty, you're a materialist! Come on.