Ducktales (1987) s01e31 Episode Script

Life is like a hurricane Here in Duckburg Racecars, lasers, aeroplanes It's a duck blur You might solve a mystery Or rewrite history - DuckTales - Ooh, ooh, ooh Every day they're out there making DuckTales Ooh, ooh, ooh Tales of derring-do, bad and good luck tales - D-d-d-danger - Watch behind you - There's a stranger - Out to find you What to do? Just grab on to some DuckTales Ooh, ooh, ooh Every day they're out there making DuckTales Ooh, ooh, ooh Tales of derring-do, bad and good luck tales Ooh, ooh, ooh Not ponytails or cottontails - No, DuckTales - Ooh, ooh, ooh I love to count money, I do, I do I love to count money, it's true, it's true Mm, I love money! Ooh, how I love money! Let me count the ways.
Fives, tens, 20s.
Are you ready to go, Uncle Scrooge? I certainly am, boys.
Just let me finish up.
Not bad for a half-day's work.
I guess I can afford to take the afternoon off.
- Yippee! - Hey, look out, fish! All right! Sir, I'm afraid I have some bad news.
The Queen of the South has been reported missing.
The Queen of the South? - She's one of your cargo ships, sir.
- What?! Left port two days ago carrying Chunky style? Any sign of the crew? Uh, the whole ship vanished, sir, just like the others.
Bermuda Triangle.
The Bermuda Triangle? Gosh, the scariest triangle in the world.
This is an outrage! This is deplorable! This is unacceptable! This this This is the third time in two years.
Yes, and it's time I took charge of the matter personally! So much for going fishing.
Get my flagship ready for sea immediately! You mean you're going to the Bermuda Triangle, Uncle Scrooge? Absolutely.
That mystery stuff is just an old sea story.
But ships disappear there all the time, don't they? And hundreds more pass through the Bermuda Triangle daily.
It's a heavily traveled area.
It's as safe as my safe.
Good, then you can take us with you so we can go fishing.
- Yeah! - Yeah! Uh, fishing? Fishing! Yes, of course.
Why not? We'll leave on the morning tide.
Welcome aboard, Mr.
McDucky! That's McDuck.
Who are you? I'm Captain Foghorn at your service.
Where's my regular flagship captain? Goodness me, I thought this was your regular flagship.
Where is the captain who regularly captains my flagship, Captain? Oh! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Silly me! He's on vacation.
I was sent over by Temp Cap.
- Temp Cap? - Temporary Captain Service.
We have a special this week.
Seven seas for the price of six.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha! That's a good one! Very well, Captain Foghorn.
Cast off.
Oh, boy! Let's get our fishing poles! We're going too fast.
Yeah! We can't catch fish if they can't catch us! My bait has been water-skiing ever since we left.
Captain Foghorn, I want you to plot the straightest, fastest course into the dead center of the Bermuda Triangle.
Grr! I wish you wouldn't use the word "dead" when you talk about where we're heading, Mr.
McDuck! That's scary.
Oh? Well, I'm the boss, and I've also been known to use the words "You're fired," "You'll never work again," and "Arrest that man," so get me to the Bermuda Triangle.
Look! A school of dolphins! They look afraid.
Really afraid! Yeah, I've seen the same expressions in a can of sardines.
Gee, what could have scared them like that? We've just crossed into the Bermuda Triangle, Captain Foghorn.
We'd better turn back.
We don't have a chance.
Nonsense! It's just a little storm.
Uh, does anyone know how to spell "SOS"? Looks like we're heading into a storm! The Junior Woodchuck Guidebook says you can tell how many miles away a storm is by counting the seconds between the lightning and the thunder.
Great.
Let's try it.
I'll do the counting.
One This is the worst storm I've ever seen in all my years at sea.
How many years have you been at sea, Captain Foghorn? running the boat ride at Kiddieland.
The kids! Ah, yes, the kids! They used to call me Captain Toot-Toot.
I'll take the wheel, Mr.
Sparks! Are you boys OK? We were a little worried, Uncle Scrooge.
Just hold tight to the rail and keep moving.
There's nothing to be afraid of.
Hold on, Uncle Scrooge! Don't let go, Uncle Scrooge! Come on, pull! Ooh! - Are you all right, Uncle Scrooge? - I'm all right.
It's that loony Captain Foghorn I'm worried about.
Come on, boys.
Whoa-oa-oa, ahh! Whoa-oa-oa-oa.
Uhh! Sorry, Captain Foghorn.
I'll have to take over as captain.
Ah, come on! I want to flip for it! I'm afraid you already have.
I'm in command now.
Gee, you're doing a great job, Uncle Scrooge.
Everything's so still.
Wow, look at that fog! - It's getting thicker.
- I can't see the water.
I can't even see the end of my beak.
Argh! Uh, has anybody seen my whistle? We seem to have run aground.
I'm afraid we're in big trouble, boys.
Good thing you're in charge, Uncle Scrooge.
All right, engine room, try it again! Reverse all engines.
It's no good, Mr.
McDuck.
Must be seaweed wrapped around the propeller shaft.
Very well, Mr.
Sparks.
Stand by.
Ah, I've never seen anything like it.
Reminds me of the worst dream I ever had.
- Louie in Spinachland? - You got it.
The fog is blocking out the sun.
Boys, maybe we should take a closer look.
Hmm, seems almost firm enough to walk on.
It's all right.
Come on.
It's like walking on mint jelly.
Seems to be getting firmer.
Yes, yes.
Very solid.
My, my, what a dismal place.
No wonder those dolphins we saw were trying to get away.
Aye, nothing could live here.
At least not for very long.
Do you smell what I smell? Faint but familiar.
Peanut butter! Chunky peanut butter! The Queen of the South! Come on, boys! Ooh! Drat this horrid place! These were my favorite spats.
There she is! Ugh! She's a total loss! But not from the wreck.
Someone cut open the hull to get at her cargo.
Why me? Why couldn't it have happened to to the Love Boat? Gee, she's only been here a few days, but look how much the seaweed has grown.
Aye, and no sign of the crew.
Let's keep going, boys.
Some of these wrecks have been here hundreds of years.
Gee.
I wonder what happened to all the people.
Got any more questions, Louie? Yeah.
Is it possible to make friends with zombies? Zombies? Zombies? Ha ha ha ha! He thinks we're zombies.
Ha ha ha ha.
It'll all be explained, newcomers.
Come, we'll take you to Captain Bounty.
Unwelcome, newcomers, unwelcome.
I'm Captain Bounty.
I'm the ruler around here - the main bossman, top dog, big cheese.
Numero uno, that's me.
Join our people, or you'll walk the plankton! Just a little joke we have when we unwelcome newcomers.
Why do you keep saying "unwelcome"? Are you kidding? You're as unwelcome as the Seaweed Monster on his way to dinner.
The last thing I need is more people to keep track of.
Who do you think I am, Santa Claus? I seem to be meeting a lot of loony sea captains lately.
As you can see, we're hopelessly lost on a horrible seaweed island, drifting back and forth in the Bermuda triangle with no hope of rescue.
But we still appreciate a good joke.
It's the only thing that keeps up our spirits.
Come.
While you're leading us to your ship, I'll give you the standard tour.
Everyone has a job here.
I know, because I tell everyone what to do.
Look there.
Water gatherers.
We collect rain for drinking water.
Fortunately, it rains here all the time.
That explains your warped sense of humor.
Most of our food is made from seaweed.
Seaweed pancakes, seaweed pudding, and of course, everybody's favorite, the tasty sea dog.
A seaweed weenie in a seaweed bun.
We would have called it a hot dog but it's cold.
Why don't you just leave this dismal place? Can't.
Every ship that comes near us gets hopelessly stuck.
The best we can do is stick together! Maybe what you need is a new head man around here.
Someone enterprising, like me.
With a new approach, plans for escape, better jokes.
Hold it right there, buddy.
I'm the only leader around here.
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah! You'll follow my orders just like everybody else.
Captain Bounty will show you how to survive.
Isn't that right, my people? Put them to work in the seaweed fields.
Then find their ship and divide their supplies equally.
Oh Oh, my aching back.
This place is horrible.
To think this stuff is gonna be made into food.
Yuck! What's that? I sure hope it isn't the dinner bell.
It's midday, and all's as well as can be expected.
Speak quietly.
I must be brief.
- Who are you? - I'm Captain Slattery.
Not another captain.
I work for you, Mr.
McDuck.
I was on the first ship you lost.
- Of course, Slattery! And your crew? - They have us working all over the island.
When we heard you had arrived, it sure picked up our spirits.
We all want to get out of here, but Captain Bounty Aye.
He won't listen to reason, and his people outnumber us.
Most of them want to leave, too.
They're just afraid to stand up to Captain Bounty.
But now that you're here Aye, aye, it's up to me to take charge.
Gather everyone who's with us.
The boys and myself will return to my flagship and get more help.
Will do, Mr.
McDuck.
So, Captain Bounty thinks he can buy loyalty with seaweed hot dogs and corny jokes.
Ha ha ha ha! Well, the joke's on him! Ow! I'm going to get all of us off this miserable island, and nothing's going to stand in my way.
Run, boys! The Seaweed Monster! Run to the old galleon! The old galleon, Mr.
McDuck! We'll never catch up with him! Aye.
Harpsichord music is the only thing that seems to soothe the savage beast.
You're a man of many talents, Captain Bounty.
Aye, Captain Bounty looks after his people, even the ones he doesn't like very much.
Aye, you saved my life.
That's why it's not easy for me to say this.
I'm taking over as leader around here.
Haven't learned your lesson, eh? I'm gonna open your eyes the hard way.
It's you who needs to open his eyes! What do you mean? You've forced your people to survive by taking away their hope! Hope? What hope? That escape is possible.
He's right.
Aah! Oof! What is the meaning of this? I've shown you how to survive, how to work together.
We're grateful more than we can say, but we want to at least try to get home.
Is-is that how you all feel? I had no idea! You win.
Pull that line over here, mate.
That's right.
Let's get going.
Uncle Scrooge, we found some diving masks.
Good, good.
Now we can cut away the seaweed from around the propeller.
It'll never work.
Never! If this works, we're going to be packed with passengers.
Oh, goody! Ha ha ha! It'll be just like the boat ride at Kiddieland! Oh! Come on, go to sleep, you great ugly beast.
Phew! Well, you did it, Mr.
McDuck.
Aye, but it was you that helped them survive long enough to make their escape.
Uh-oh! Look, Uncle Scrooge! We didn't get all the seaweed cut away! Ha ha ha ha.
Don't worry.
That wee patch won't give us any trouble.
It's coming after you again, Uncle Scrooge! Don't I know it! It's got me! Aah! I'm sorry! Nobody plays the harpsichord anymore.
All right, mateys, just like I showed you.
Whoa! Hey, he's running back under the seaweed! The thing seems to be in pain.
Aye, he's never seen the sun.
His world is back in the Bermuda Triangle.
I think my world is back there, too.
One at a time, please.
One at a time.
Can't say I agree with you, Captain Bounty, but then again, I never did.
Well, Scrooge, I'd rather be a big fish in a little pond than a little fish in a big fish market.
Besides, my old buddy here needs a ride home.
You're a compassionate man, Captain Bounty.
You saved my life, and there'll always be other lives to save on that seaweed island.
Aye, that's where I'm needed.
Thanks for the boat.
I'll get it stuck in that seaweed real good! - So long, Captain! - Goodbye, Captain Bounty! Good luck!