Batman s01e33 Episode Script

Selina Kyle, you have pled guilty to the charges brought against Catwoman.
Do you understand you can be sentenced to as much as 25 years in prison? Yes, Your Honor.
Regardless of the fact that you committed the crimes to benefit wildlife theft is theft.
- Yes, Your Honor.
However, since you did help save Gotham City from annihilation and the district attorney has recommended a plea bargain I have decided to sentence you to five years probation.
I'm not finished! But I'm warning you, Ms.
Kyle, if you ever don your Catwoman costume again to violate the law, I'll not only revoke probation, I'll throw the book at you.
I understand.
One question from you and a picture.
I'll lose my job if I don't get the question.
Ms.
Kyle.
Just one question: Is Catwoman really finished? And though she's been released on probation, the question still remains: Can this lady leopard really change her spots? I do hope you'll be seeing Ms.
Selina now that she's free to prowl again.
I don't think so.
But I thought you'd grown quite fond of her.
I assumed the feeling was mutual.
Almost.
She's in love with Batman.
Oh, dear.
These modern relationships can be so complicated.
Besides, I'm not totally convinced she's given up her criminal life.
Oh, Maven, I can't believe I'm really free.
Come here, Isis.
Where's my little precious? There's something I have to tell you.
- Maven, where's my cat? - I I don't know.
A couple of days ago, I left the window open, and she was gone.
I think she went looking for you.
I searched everywhere.
I'm so sorry, Selina.
Temperatures have reached record lows as another snowstorm heads our way.
We advise our listeners to keep children and pets inside.
Isis? Relax.
I'm a friend.
Fleabags.
Dirty, lousy, stinking fleabags.
Get them, Paunch.
Come to mama, you disgusting fur ball.
- Just what do you think you're doing? - Catching strays.
What's it to you? You're obviously not the animal shelter.
So, what do you want with these cats? None of your business.
So kiss off.
- Fine.
But I'm taking my friends.
- Hey! You asked for it, sister.
Now, tell me, what are you up to? Paunch, do something! That's one way to take out the trash.
Laugh this off, sister! Nail her! Paunch? Hey, you can't do this to me! Put a lid on it, sister.
You were supposed to stay out of trouble.
Don't tell me you're my very own private probation officer.
How often would you like me to check in? I'm afraid our reunion will have to wait.
All right, what's going on here? She jumped us.
I wanna press charges.
They were stealing cats.
Stealing from who, you dumb cluck? They're strays.
We were rounding them up to find them good homes when this maniac attacked us.
This is insane.
Sounds like we better settle this downtown, Ms.
Kyle.
- Downtown? - You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
The speed at which the toxin overtakes the animal's system is something to behold even with a species this large.
There.
You can see the change almost instantly.
Careful, sir.
One little nip, and the toxin will spread through you with the same virulence.
Good, Milo.
Remember, speed is of the essence.
I expect this operation to be completed by tomorrow night.
Sorry, kitten but you heard the man.
Maven, how on earth did you raise my bail at this hour? I see.
Your bail money is safe.
I promise.
That's not important, Selina.
You are.
Bruce, I like you a lot.
But as a friend.
I understand.
Then, as a friend, may I point out this arrest could revoke your probation? I'll worry about that after I find my cat.
I want to know why those creeps from the alley have a big-time attorney from Daggett Labs.
I spend a night in jail, and he has them back on the street in less than an hour.
Roland Daggett is a dangerous man, Selina.
I'd be very careful.
Don't worry.
You won't see Selina Kyle anywhere near Daggett Labs.
Our sources tell us Daggett's pharmaceuticals arm is coming out with a hot new drug.
- What kind? - Some sort of antitoxin.
All we really know is Daggett's had his best people on it for months.
Why the sudden interest? Think he's up to something? That goes without saying, doesn't it? Isis! What have they done to you, my precious? - Wow, look at what the cat dragged in.
- Nasty wound you got there, pussycat.
- You gonna lick it and make it all better? - What have you done to these animals? Nothing compared to what we're gonna do to you, pussycat.
Let's skin that cat! You two yobbos wouldn't have noticed, but she's been bitten.
She can run from us, but not the toxin.
Isis.
Isis? What's happening to me? Isis.
Stay away from me.
- No! - Catwoman, it's me.
Batman? - You're hot.
- Now you notice.
I've got to get you to a doctor.
No.
You can't.
Daggett will have me arrested.
I have a hideaway.
Not far.
Please.
You know, you haven't told me why you've come to my rescue, Batman.
Are you getting soft on criminals or just on me? - I think the fever is making you delusional.
- Ever the escape artist, I see.
What's this? Isis bit me.
It's not her fault.
They did something to her.
All the animals.
Must save Isis.
And we will.
What's the delay, Milo? You should have had these animals on the street by now.
Right, Mr.
Daggett.
We're waiting for Paunch.
I sent him to the warehouse for a pack of the antitoxin just in case there are any accidents while transporting the animals.
Let's play a little game.
I'll try to guess Daggett's plan and you'll let me know if I'm right.
Viral antitoxins for a plague that doesn't exist yet.
But if the plague is introduced via stray dogs and cats it'll blanket Gotham City within weeks.
Days, actually.
You know how many strays there are in Gotham, Batman? Three hundred thousand.
Imagine if even a tenth of them carried the virus.
Not only will this little bottle make me a hero, it'll make me a fortune as well.
Take care of him.
Get him! Batman! Thattaboy, Fido.
Rip him to bits.
- I can't imagine he could elude that beast.
- You'd better make sure of that, my friend.
Because if he does get away, I suggest you keep on driving as far away from Gotham as this truck can take you.
He's dog meat.
No! - He's not coming up.
- Just let him show those pointy little ears.
No one could withstand this degree of hypothermia.
Guy's gotta be an ice cube by now.
Look out, you fool! It's off to the pound for you.
Tonight on the news, they called you a hero.
You keep this up, and they'll start making Catwoman dolls.
- Are you sure you'll be okay? - Go home, Maven.
And thanks.
She'll turn up.
I know she will.
Isis.
Isis, you're all right.
But how?