Sonic Boom (2014) s01e33 Episode Script
Eggman the Auteur
Grrr! Tails, I need jumper cables.
You got any duct tape? -How about a battery? -Anti-matter? Self-generating? I don't know.
Something with a lot of juice.
Anti-matter is on the top shelf behind the video games.
Thanks.
Ha! Initiate Spinning Blades of Death! Spinning Blades of Death? I guess that sounds safe.
Woo-hoo-hoo! Activating hyper mode.
Yeah! -[bleep.]
-Oh.
Sonic here.
Sonic, did you return the book I lent you to the library? Um, not yet.
[Knuckles.]
Aargh! It's due today.
If you don't return it on time I'll have to pay late fees.
Late fees! Slam on your worry brakes, Amy, I'm all over this.
Not a problem.
Problem.
I can't remember where the book is.
When I can't find something, I retrace my steps.
OK, what did I do yesterday? Oh, yeah, that's where I left it.
-Got it! -Nice.
But why didn't you take it straight to the library? Because you helped me track it down so you must share the glory of this victory.
And I didn't think of that.
I feel glorious.
And victorious.
Now get going.
The library closes in seven minutes.
Plenty of time.
Not a problem.
I feel glorious too.
No, wait, that's nauseous.
Seven minutes? I'll get this to the library in ten seconds.
I'll have six minutes 50 seconds to eat a chilli dog, relax on the beach and read a book.
Which I'll no longer have.
But still.
After you.
No, please.
After you.
I have all the time in the world.
I thought the same thing when I was your age, sonny.
Did I ever tell you about the time I got a soda out of the vending machine without putting money in? Uh, no, we just met.
Oh, it was the best day of my life.
-Going fishing? -For aliens.
I dreamt about badminton and teacups last night.
And you know what that means? Let's pretend that I don't.
It means aliens are coming or I'm going to a badminton tea party.
But I'm not taking any chances.
Well, good luck with that.
Don't mind if I do! Actually, I'm not sure what I want.
There are so many choices.
Should I have a Meh Burger, or a Meh Burger with cheese, or a double Meh Burger, or a double Meh Burger with cheese, or a Super Meh Burger, or a Super Meh Burger with cheese? I know I'll have a hot dog.
But should I have a hot dog with sauerkraut, or a hot dog with onions, or a hot dog with mustard, or a hot dog with How about a chilli dog? Actually, a chilli dog sounds delicious.
Would you like something to drink with that? Something to drink? Hmm.
Should I have a soda or a water or a shake or a juice Juice.
Have juice.
Everyone loves juice.
I'll have juice.
-Would you like to have -He doesn't want anything else! [engine revs.]
You cut in front of Motobug.
He held my place while I was in the little villains' room.
Sorry, Egghead.
I didn't see him.
Go ahead.
No, no, please.
You're Sonic the Hedgehog.
You deserve to be next.
Go on.
I insist.
Well, I am in kind of a hurry.
Thanks, Egghead.
One chilli dog, please.
I'd like a chilli dog with extra relish.
Sorry, we're sold out.
[Sonic gulps.]
Want a bite? No, I don't want a bite.
I want my own.
We have some at the warehouse two villages over.
[sighs.]
Be right back.
Did I ever tell you about the time I got a free soda? Yes! There it is.
Do you mind if I go first? Did I ever tell you about the time I found some money on the street? You got to be No, we just met.
I used the money to buy a soda, so it was like the soda was free.
I wish I liked soda.
I asked for extra relish.
You got me thinking, sonny.
Today's the day! I'm headed home to drink my soda.
Aha! Gotcha, alien! You're not an alien.
Really? You think? Get me out of here, Sticks! Um, OK.
Which one was it again? You got to be kidding me.
[groans.]
You're welcome! Plenty of time.
Oh, come on! Huh! I need a straw.
Sonic! Sonic! I have a flat tyre and I'm late to feed my children.
Can you help me fix it? Um, I have a book to return, then I'll come back, I promise.
Two minutes, tops.
Oh, that's OK.
Growing children don't need nutrition.
It just keeps them healthy and stops their bones from getting brittle.
I'll just fix this flat myself.
My sciatica's flaring up, but I'm sure I'll only be laid up for a week or so.
You go return your book while I struggle painfully and injure myself.
[groans.]
Done! Book, please.
Eat this, you line-cutting, relish-forgetting rodent.
I ran to the warehouse and got you a chilli dog.
Doesn't that count for anything? No! You ruined my chilli dog moment.
OK, fine, I'm happy to battle you over this, but can I return this library book first? I'll show you exactly the same consideration you showed me.
None! None consideration! All this over a chilli dog? It's the principle! I'm sure you'll think twice about cutting in line next time.
Did someone get pushed to the back of the line one too many times in elementary school? It was middle school, and those girls were vicious.
Minions, attack! Sonic! We got your back! Still plenty of time to get to the library.
OK, where's the book? You mean my book? The one you were returning, that you said was not a problem.
I still have 30 seconds.
We're fine.
Give me that! But pictures.
See? And ten seconds to spare.
We're closed.
You're not.
There's seven seconds left.
I closed early.
I'm taking my assistant to get some of those chilli dogs.
Chilli dogs? Thanks, Egghead.
Told you I'd get it here on time.
You got any duct tape? -How about a battery? -Anti-matter? Self-generating? I don't know.
Something with a lot of juice.
Anti-matter is on the top shelf behind the video games.
Thanks.
Ha! Initiate Spinning Blades of Death! Spinning Blades of Death? I guess that sounds safe.
Woo-hoo-hoo! Activating hyper mode.
Yeah! -[bleep.]
-Oh.
Sonic here.
Sonic, did you return the book I lent you to the library? Um, not yet.
[Knuckles.]
Aargh! It's due today.
If you don't return it on time I'll have to pay late fees.
Late fees! Slam on your worry brakes, Amy, I'm all over this.
Not a problem.
Problem.
I can't remember where the book is.
When I can't find something, I retrace my steps.
OK, what did I do yesterday? Oh, yeah, that's where I left it.
-Got it! -Nice.
But why didn't you take it straight to the library? Because you helped me track it down so you must share the glory of this victory.
And I didn't think of that.
I feel glorious.
And victorious.
Now get going.
The library closes in seven minutes.
Plenty of time.
Not a problem.
I feel glorious too.
No, wait, that's nauseous.
Seven minutes? I'll get this to the library in ten seconds.
I'll have six minutes 50 seconds to eat a chilli dog, relax on the beach and read a book.
Which I'll no longer have.
But still.
After you.
No, please.
After you.
I have all the time in the world.
I thought the same thing when I was your age, sonny.
Did I ever tell you about the time I got a soda out of the vending machine without putting money in? Uh, no, we just met.
Oh, it was the best day of my life.
-Going fishing? -For aliens.
I dreamt about badminton and teacups last night.
And you know what that means? Let's pretend that I don't.
It means aliens are coming or I'm going to a badminton tea party.
But I'm not taking any chances.
Well, good luck with that.
Don't mind if I do! Actually, I'm not sure what I want.
There are so many choices.
Should I have a Meh Burger, or a Meh Burger with cheese, or a double Meh Burger, or a double Meh Burger with cheese, or a Super Meh Burger, or a Super Meh Burger with cheese? I know I'll have a hot dog.
But should I have a hot dog with sauerkraut, or a hot dog with onions, or a hot dog with mustard, or a hot dog with How about a chilli dog? Actually, a chilli dog sounds delicious.
Would you like something to drink with that? Something to drink? Hmm.
Should I have a soda or a water or a shake or a juice Juice.
Have juice.
Everyone loves juice.
I'll have juice.
-Would you like to have -He doesn't want anything else! [engine revs.]
You cut in front of Motobug.
He held my place while I was in the little villains' room.
Sorry, Egghead.
I didn't see him.
Go ahead.
No, no, please.
You're Sonic the Hedgehog.
You deserve to be next.
Go on.
I insist.
Well, I am in kind of a hurry.
Thanks, Egghead.
One chilli dog, please.
I'd like a chilli dog with extra relish.
Sorry, we're sold out.
[Sonic gulps.]
Want a bite? No, I don't want a bite.
I want my own.
We have some at the warehouse two villages over.
[sighs.]
Be right back.
Did I ever tell you about the time I got a free soda? Yes! There it is.
Do you mind if I go first? Did I ever tell you about the time I found some money on the street? You got to be No, we just met.
I used the money to buy a soda, so it was like the soda was free.
I wish I liked soda.
I asked for extra relish.
You got me thinking, sonny.
Today's the day! I'm headed home to drink my soda.
Aha! Gotcha, alien! You're not an alien.
Really? You think? Get me out of here, Sticks! Um, OK.
Which one was it again? You got to be kidding me.
[groans.]
You're welcome! Plenty of time.
Oh, come on! Huh! I need a straw.
Sonic! Sonic! I have a flat tyre and I'm late to feed my children.
Can you help me fix it? Um, I have a book to return, then I'll come back, I promise.
Two minutes, tops.
Oh, that's OK.
Growing children don't need nutrition.
It just keeps them healthy and stops their bones from getting brittle.
I'll just fix this flat myself.
My sciatica's flaring up, but I'm sure I'll only be laid up for a week or so.
You go return your book while I struggle painfully and injure myself.
[groans.]
Done! Book, please.
Eat this, you line-cutting, relish-forgetting rodent.
I ran to the warehouse and got you a chilli dog.
Doesn't that count for anything? No! You ruined my chilli dog moment.
OK, fine, I'm happy to battle you over this, but can I return this library book first? I'll show you exactly the same consideration you showed me.
None! None consideration! All this over a chilli dog? It's the principle! I'm sure you'll think twice about cutting in line next time.
Did someone get pushed to the back of the line one too many times in elementary school? It was middle school, and those girls were vicious.
Minions, attack! Sonic! We got your back! Still plenty of time to get to the library.
OK, where's the book? You mean my book? The one you were returning, that you said was not a problem.
I still have 30 seconds.
We're fine.
Give me that! But pictures.
See? And ten seconds to spare.
We're closed.
You're not.
There's seven seconds left.
I closed early.
I'm taking my assistant to get some of those chilli dogs.
Chilli dogs? Thanks, Egghead.
Told you I'd get it here on time.