The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! (1989) s01e49 Episode Script
Glasnuts/Plummers Academy
Hey Paisanos!
It's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!
We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪
we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪
If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪
we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪
brothers Unh!
H-hooked on the brothers.
Gimme gimme, gimme gimme.
Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪
get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪
You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪
others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪
the brothers.
To the brink!
Unh!
Unh!
I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪
The brothers!
The brothers! ♪
[ring]
[Luigi:] Mario
Brothers Plumbing,
you clog 'em, we clear 'em!
[chattering]
What?
[chattering]
The President, of
the United States?
Could you hold on
just a minute sir?
[chattering]
Thank you.
Mario?
Mario, come here, come here.
There's a guy on the phone
says.you ready for this?
He's President of
the United States.
[laughs]
Shhh.
Let's enjoy this.
Well, well, hello?
[chattering]
Yes, what is that sir?
[chattering]
Premier Gorbachev, is
coming to the United States,
and wants to meet us
the Mario Brothers right?
[laughing]
This is good, this is good, who
does he think he's fooling?
Give me the phone.
Hello?
[chattering]
Yes Mr. President.
[chattering]
I've got a little
question to ask you sir.
Is your refrigerator running?
[chattering]
It is?
Well then you'd
better catch it.
What?
Mr. President, yes sir.
[chattering]
Well thank you
very much for calling.
[chattering]
Yes, I'll make sure to
give your regards to Gorbi.
Right, thank you very much.
[snickering]
Pretty funny huh Luigi?
Come on, you know
who that probably was?
Rali.
Rali's always doing
this stuff to us,
do you remember last time?
[ding dong]
Get the door.
Oh that guy, he had
us running everywhere.
Premier Gorbachev,
yea ok fine, sure.
You're not Rali.
No, I am Boris, KGB.
Announcing Premier
of Russia: Gorbachev.
Greetings Mario Brothers!
Enough small talk,
my spies tell me,
that you make best
pizza in Brooklyn!
I want to learn how!
So impress!
Yo, yo!
It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game, ♪
found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain, ♪
lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land. ♪
Comin' atcha
with the plumbers, ♪
you'll be hooked
on the brothers! ♪
Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving, ♪
they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving. ♪
Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers, ♪
they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers! ♪
Unh! ♪
Ahh, yikes!
Wait!
Hang on a minute, you
fooling faucet heads!
Wait up!
Wait up!
[Mario:]
Plumber's
log number 218.
We were up to our
moustaches in pickle soup.
But things were
about to get worse.
You're all stopped
up, drain brains.
Koopa Pack, attack!
En garde!
Yow!
Put me down, you scaly scum.
I hate to part with you,
but the Princess needs help.
Ahh, ahhh, ahhh!
I'll get you for this Mario!
When you hurt Koopa's
nose, you've blown it.
Yeow!
That'll teach
those tap turkeys!
Now, get this thing off!
With pleasure your
reptilian rottenness.
Ouch!
I meant the plunger
rodent, not my nose!
Mario!
Come on, we gotta
get out of here.
Who cares?
That slimy snake breath
Koopa has my plumber's helper.
Who knows what he'll do to it?
I'll buy you a new one.
It's one of a kind.
The President of the United
States gave that plunger to me
personally, at
the White House.
The President?
Wow!
What for?
It all started the day Luigi
and I entered the Brooklyn
Plumber's Academy to
start our basic draining.
And got assigned the
meanest, nastiest,
Drain Sergeant ever.
[Gruff Male Voice:]
Ok scumballs, stand tall!
Shoulders back!
Stomachs in!
I'm Drain Sergeant Kooperman,
and you are the crummiest,
most slovenly,
shortest, would-be
plumbers I have ever seen.
Phew.
How do you and this paunch
expect to fit under a sink?
Hey, leave my
brother's paunch out of this!
Watch it klutz!
You guys look more like
drain clogs than plumbers!
We need men, with
the right stuff!
We got the right stuff!
You got the wrong stuff!
[gasps]
You'll flunk
out the first day,
I'll see to it personally!
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
Faster recruits, faster!
Now, halt!
But Sergeant Kooperman,
this is a fire escape.
Where are we putting the tub?
[laughs]
We really have to do
this to become a plumber?
If ya don't, I get to boot ya
right out of the
Plumber's Academy.
Piece of parmesan
cheesecake, right Luigi?
I think I wanna
reconsider my career options.
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
What took ya so long!?
Can we take a
break and tell ya?
[panting]
Take a break?
Ha, are you kiddin'?
You're gonna carry that tub
back down and do it again!
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
Are you sure we
wanna be plumbers?
Keep plunging Luigi, we gotta
show Kooperman we got the
right stuff!
You got ten seconds
to unplug that sink!
Only ten?
Now you got eight!
Seven!
Six!
Five!
Four!
Three!
Two!--
Yuck!
That does it!
You two are on K.P.!
K.P.?
Yea, killer plumbing!
[panting]
Excuse me Sergeant Kooperman,
could we please have a drink
of water?
Ha!
The guy is about to flunk
out of Plumber's Academy,
and he wants water.
I guess that means no.
Now get up here!
Ok, this is your last chance.
You got twenty minutes to
fit all those pipes together!
Yes sir, Sergeant!
Where are our wrenches?
Who said you get wrenches?
Now get to work!
Time's up recruits!
Now for your final test!
But Sergeant this isn't
fair, we didn't have wrenches!
Who said I was fair?
[gasps]
Help!
We're drowning!
Help?
I don't help guys
with the wrong stuff.
You'll never be plumbers,
and that's what they'll put on
your tombstones.
Push Luigi, push!
Whoaaa!
Holy macaroni!
Mama mia!
Luigi, look!
It's Salvador Drainado:
the founder of the Plumber's
Academy.
[Luigi:] The most famous
plumber who ever lived.
Look what it
says on the plaque!
When the plumbing gets
tough, the tough get plumbing!
Yeah, but we got the wrong
stuff and we got flunked.
I can't quit now, Luigi!
I was born with a
plunger in my hand.
I know, boy it was
awfully hard on Mom.
Come on, we gotta find some
other kind of line of work.
Maybe we could be librarians?
Hey, what's going on?
Where ya been,
down a sewer pipe?
The President of the U.S. of A.
is showing the President
of Russia around Brooklyn.
Hey Luigi, let's
stake out a seat!
Don't worry dear, your
plumbing will be like new when
Sergeant Kooperman is through.
[whistle]
Ah!
A month's supply of
Drain Buster is here,
that should do the trick.
Hmm, I wonder what he
wants with concrete?
Good!
We'll add some more.
Ah?
[laughs]
Better fix it at the manhole.
Hey, sewage for brains,
what're you doing with my fast
drying concrete?
You say, fast drying?
Ah!
Look Luigi!
It's the President,
right here in Brooklyn!
[yelling]
Quick!
We gotta save the President!
Is there a
plumber in the house?
Luigi!
This is our big chance to
prove we're really plumbers!
But Sergeant Kooperman
says we got the wrong stuff.
And this is the worst leak
that anyone's ever seen!
Remember Luigi, when
the plumbing gets tough,
the tough get plumbing.
Yea!
The tough get plumbing!
Yipe!
[cheering]
Thank you boys, the
Presidents are safe.
[Mario:]
So the President invited
Luigi and me to the
White House, and presented
me with my golden plumber's
helper, and Luigi
with a golden wrench.
But now, Koopa's got it.
We'll get it back Mario.
How?
We're stuck in this place!
Didn't you guys learn anything
in the Plumbing Academy?
When the plumbing gets
tough, the tough get plumbing!
She's right, Luigi!
Do you still have that
wrench the President gave you?
Sure!
Right here!
[Princess:]
Well get to it!
We'll be out of here faster than
you can say lasagna cream pie!
Owwww!
Stop!
Gee, I thought
we almost had it.
Well try something else.
Ok your royal Koopaness, take
a big sniff of this pepper.
Ah Moron!
Double moron!
How can I smell it with
this thing on my nose?
Surprise!
Ah-ah choo!
Ah choo!
Ah choo!
Ahh!
Ugh, tet off me
you faucet freak!
No way plunger nose.
Not 'til I get my presidential
plumber's helper back!
Need some back up, guys!
Ok Mario!
[banging]
[sneezing]
On three: one, two--
I want you to pull already.
Ahhh!
Three!
Hey, aren't you gonna--?
Guards!
Troopas!
Somebody!
Help!
Doesn't look like close
contact with the Koopa snout
did it any harm.
Don't you feel good now
that you have it back?
No, hungry!
And when the
plumber gets hungry,
the plumber gets pasta!
[laughter]
Like a pizza, you can
divide the world up into many,
many, many pieces eh?
Yea but if Uncle Tony comes
he'll eat more than his share
and we'll have to
order more pizza.
Gentlemen please, I
do not have much time!
Perhaps it'll go
quicker if I assisted huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Boris!
Needs borscht.
Hey, you're messin' with
Mama's special recipe.
Ukrainian sour cream.
Caviar from Mother Russia.
That looks like baby grapes.
Grrr.
Excuse me Premier.
We'll be right back.
You know something Luigi?
He may know a lot
about running the nation,
but he don't know
nothing about makin' pizza!
Shh, I know that.
You know that.
But Mario, he's
gonna hate this pizza,
he's gonna get mad, and
we're all in a lot of trouble.
It's bubbling like pizza, but
I don't know about this caviar
and this borscht.
Hey Luigi to tell you
the truth I'm worried.
Well I am too Mario.
I can see it all now: Mario
Brothers cause international
trouble, bad pizza to blame.
Is pizza ready comrades?
Yes, coming right up!
Premier Gorbachev,
Premier Gorbachev,
you know I was thinkin', you
don't want to taste this pizza.
Come on, let me take
ya to Yankee Stadium,
I'll buy ya one of them
all American hot dogs.
I want to sample
pizza of my own creation!
What?
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is great!
Hey Luigi, he likes it!
Like it?
I love it!
When I get home, I will
open pizza shop in basement of
Kremlin!
I make a million rubles!
Ho ho, I open my
own pizza place huh!?
You guys will be
famous all over Russia!
You are great Americans!
America is great country!
Hey Gorbi!
What?
Will your pizza
parlor deliver?
I promise delivery in
30 days, or pizza free!
Not a bad idea.
'Til next time everybody!
Do the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
You've got it!
It's the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪♪
It's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!
We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪
we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪
If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪
we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪
brothers Unh!
H-hooked on the brothers.
Gimme gimme, gimme gimme.
Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪
get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪
You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪
others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪
the brothers.
To the brink!
Unh!
Unh!
I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪
The brothers!
The brothers! ♪
[ring]
[Luigi:] Mario
Brothers Plumbing,
you clog 'em, we clear 'em!
[chattering]
What?
[chattering]
The President, of
the United States?
Could you hold on
just a minute sir?
[chattering]
Thank you.
Mario?
Mario, come here, come here.
There's a guy on the phone
says.you ready for this?
He's President of
the United States.
[laughs]
Shhh.
Let's enjoy this.
Well, well, hello?
[chattering]
Yes, what is that sir?
[chattering]
Premier Gorbachev, is
coming to the United States,
and wants to meet us
the Mario Brothers right?
[laughing]
This is good, this is good, who
does he think he's fooling?
Give me the phone.
Hello?
[chattering]
Yes Mr. President.
[chattering]
I've got a little
question to ask you sir.
Is your refrigerator running?
[chattering]
It is?
Well then you'd
better catch it.
What?
Mr. President, yes sir.
[chattering]
Well thank you
very much for calling.
[chattering]
Yes, I'll make sure to
give your regards to Gorbi.
Right, thank you very much.
[snickering]
Pretty funny huh Luigi?
Come on, you know
who that probably was?
Rali.
Rali's always doing
this stuff to us,
do you remember last time?
[ding dong]
Get the door.
Oh that guy, he had
us running everywhere.
Premier Gorbachev,
yea ok fine, sure.
You're not Rali.
No, I am Boris, KGB.
Announcing Premier
of Russia: Gorbachev.
Greetings Mario Brothers!
Enough small talk,
my spies tell me,
that you make best
pizza in Brooklyn!
I want to learn how!
So impress!
Yo, yo!
It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game, ♪
found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain, ♪
lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land. ♪
Comin' atcha
with the plumbers, ♪
you'll be hooked
on the brothers! ♪
Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving, ♪
they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving. ♪
Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers, ♪
they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers! ♪
Unh! ♪
Ahh, yikes!
Wait!
Hang on a minute, you
fooling faucet heads!
Wait up!
Wait up!
[Mario:]
Plumber's
log number 218.
We were up to our
moustaches in pickle soup.
But things were
about to get worse.
You're all stopped
up, drain brains.
Koopa Pack, attack!
En garde!
Yow!
Put me down, you scaly scum.
I hate to part with you,
but the Princess needs help.
Ahh, ahhh, ahhh!
I'll get you for this Mario!
When you hurt Koopa's
nose, you've blown it.
Yeow!
That'll teach
those tap turkeys!
Now, get this thing off!
With pleasure your
reptilian rottenness.
Ouch!
I meant the plunger
rodent, not my nose!
Mario!
Come on, we gotta
get out of here.
Who cares?
That slimy snake breath
Koopa has my plumber's helper.
Who knows what he'll do to it?
I'll buy you a new one.
It's one of a kind.
The President of the United
States gave that plunger to me
personally, at
the White House.
The President?
Wow!
What for?
It all started the day Luigi
and I entered the Brooklyn
Plumber's Academy to
start our basic draining.
And got assigned the
meanest, nastiest,
Drain Sergeant ever.
[Gruff Male Voice:]
Ok scumballs, stand tall!
Shoulders back!
Stomachs in!
I'm Drain Sergeant Kooperman,
and you are the crummiest,
most slovenly,
shortest, would-be
plumbers I have ever seen.
Phew.
How do you and this paunch
expect to fit under a sink?
Hey, leave my
brother's paunch out of this!
Watch it klutz!
You guys look more like
drain clogs than plumbers!
We need men, with
the right stuff!
We got the right stuff!
You got the wrong stuff!
[gasps]
You'll flunk
out the first day,
I'll see to it personally!
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
Faster recruits, faster!
Now, halt!
But Sergeant Kooperman,
this is a fire escape.
Where are we putting the tub?
[laughs]
We really have to do
this to become a plumber?
If ya don't, I get to boot ya
right out of the
Plumber's Academy.
Piece of parmesan
cheesecake, right Luigi?
I think I wanna
reconsider my career options.
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
What took ya so long!?
Can we take a
break and tell ya?
[panting]
Take a break?
Ha, are you kiddin'?
You're gonna carry that tub
back down and do it again!
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
Are you sure we
wanna be plumbers?
Keep plunging Luigi, we gotta
show Kooperman we got the
right stuff!
You got ten seconds
to unplug that sink!
Only ten?
Now you got eight!
Seven!
Six!
Five!
Four!
Three!
Two!--
Yuck!
That does it!
You two are on K.P.!
K.P.?
Yea, killer plumbing!
[panting]
Excuse me Sergeant Kooperman,
could we please have a drink
of water?
Ha!
The guy is about to flunk
out of Plumber's Academy,
and he wants water.
I guess that means no.
Now get up here!
Ok, this is your last chance.
You got twenty minutes to
fit all those pipes together!
Yes sir, Sergeant!
Where are our wrenches?
Who said you get wrenches?
Now get to work!
Time's up recruits!
Now for your final test!
But Sergeant this isn't
fair, we didn't have wrenches!
Who said I was fair?
[gasps]
Help!
We're drowning!
Help?
I don't help guys
with the wrong stuff.
You'll never be plumbers,
and that's what they'll put on
your tombstones.
Push Luigi, push!
Whoaaa!
Holy macaroni!
Mama mia!
Luigi, look!
It's Salvador Drainado:
the founder of the Plumber's
Academy.
[Luigi:] The most famous
plumber who ever lived.
Look what it
says on the plaque!
When the plumbing gets
tough, the tough get plumbing!
Yeah, but we got the wrong
stuff and we got flunked.
I can't quit now, Luigi!
I was born with a
plunger in my hand.
I know, boy it was
awfully hard on Mom.
Come on, we gotta find some
other kind of line of work.
Maybe we could be librarians?
Hey, what's going on?
Where ya been,
down a sewer pipe?
The President of the U.S. of A.
is showing the President
of Russia around Brooklyn.
Hey Luigi, let's
stake out a seat!
Don't worry dear, your
plumbing will be like new when
Sergeant Kooperman is through.
[whistle]
Ah!
A month's supply of
Drain Buster is here,
that should do the trick.
Hmm, I wonder what he
wants with concrete?
Good!
We'll add some more.
Ah?
[laughs]
Better fix it at the manhole.
Hey, sewage for brains,
what're you doing with my fast
drying concrete?
You say, fast drying?
Ah!
Look Luigi!
It's the President,
right here in Brooklyn!
[yelling]
Quick!
We gotta save the President!
Is there a
plumber in the house?
Luigi!
This is our big chance to
prove we're really plumbers!
But Sergeant Kooperman
says we got the wrong stuff.
And this is the worst leak
that anyone's ever seen!
Remember Luigi, when
the plumbing gets tough,
the tough get plumbing.
Yea!
The tough get plumbing!
Yipe!
[cheering]
Thank you boys, the
Presidents are safe.
[Mario:]
So the President invited
Luigi and me to the
White House, and presented
me with my golden plumber's
helper, and Luigi
with a golden wrench.
But now, Koopa's got it.
We'll get it back Mario.
How?
We're stuck in this place!
Didn't you guys learn anything
in the Plumbing Academy?
When the plumbing gets
tough, the tough get plumbing!
She's right, Luigi!
Do you still have that
wrench the President gave you?
Sure!
Right here!
[Princess:]
Well get to it!
We'll be out of here faster than
you can say lasagna cream pie!
Owwww!
Stop!
Gee, I thought
we almost had it.
Well try something else.
Ok your royal Koopaness, take
a big sniff of this pepper.
Ah Moron!
Double moron!
How can I smell it with
this thing on my nose?
Surprise!
Ah-ah choo!
Ah choo!
Ah choo!
Ahh!
Ugh, tet off me
you faucet freak!
No way plunger nose.
Not 'til I get my presidential
plumber's helper back!
Need some back up, guys!
Ok Mario!
[banging]
[sneezing]
On three: one, two--
I want you to pull already.
Ahhh!
Three!
Hey, aren't you gonna--?
Guards!
Troopas!
Somebody!
Help!
Doesn't look like close
contact with the Koopa snout
did it any harm.
Don't you feel good now
that you have it back?
No, hungry!
And when the
plumber gets hungry,
the plumber gets pasta!
[laughter]
Like a pizza, you can
divide the world up into many,
many, many pieces eh?
Yea but if Uncle Tony comes
he'll eat more than his share
and we'll have to
order more pizza.
Gentlemen please, I
do not have much time!
Perhaps it'll go
quicker if I assisted huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Boris!
Needs borscht.
Hey, you're messin' with
Mama's special recipe.
Ukrainian sour cream.
Caviar from Mother Russia.
That looks like baby grapes.
Grrr.
Excuse me Premier.
We'll be right back.
You know something Luigi?
He may know a lot
about running the nation,
but he don't know
nothing about makin' pizza!
Shh, I know that.
You know that.
But Mario, he's
gonna hate this pizza,
he's gonna get mad, and
we're all in a lot of trouble.
It's bubbling like pizza, but
I don't know about this caviar
and this borscht.
Hey Luigi to tell you
the truth I'm worried.
Well I am too Mario.
I can see it all now: Mario
Brothers cause international
trouble, bad pizza to blame.
Is pizza ready comrades?
Yes, coming right up!
Premier Gorbachev,
Premier Gorbachev,
you know I was thinkin', you
don't want to taste this pizza.
Come on, let me take
ya to Yankee Stadium,
I'll buy ya one of them
all American hot dogs.
I want to sample
pizza of my own creation!
What?
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is not good.
Is great!
Hey Luigi, he likes it!
Like it?
I love it!
When I get home, I will
open pizza shop in basement of
Kremlin!
I make a million rubles!
Ho ho, I open my
own pizza place huh!?
You guys will be
famous all over Russia!
You are great Americans!
America is great country!
Hey Gorbi!
What?
Will your pizza
parlor deliver?
I promise delivery in
30 days, or pizza free!
Not a bad idea.
'Til next time everybody!
Do the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
You've got it!
It's the Mario!
Do the Mario!
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go!
Do the Mario!
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪♪