The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! (1989) s01e54 Episode Script

Hey Paisanos!
it's the Super Mario
Brother's Super Show!
We're the Mario Brothers,
and plumbing's our game, ♪
we're not like the
others who get all the fame. ♪
If your sink is in trouble
you can call us on the double, ♪
we're faster than the
others you'll be hooked on the ♪
brothers Unh! ♪
H-hooked on the brothers. ♪
Gimme gimme, gimme gimme. ♪
Yo, you're in for a treat,
so hang on to your seat, ♪
get ready for adventure
and remarkable feats. ♪
You'll meet Koopas, the
Troopas the Princess and the ♪
others, hanging with the
plumbers you'll be hooked on ♪
the brothers. ♪
To the brink! ♪
Unh! ♪
Unh! ♪
I say h-h-h-h-hooked
on the brothers! ♪
The brothers! ♪
The brothers! ♪♪
[Luigi:] I say, good
afternoon your Majesty.
Would you care
for a spot of tea?
Perhaps a whole cup of tea?
Woo cheerio pip pip
and all that rot,
carry on, tally
ho, to the hounds,
to the hounds, look
up, back up, yes--
W-w-wait hold it, hold it, so
you finally went cuckoo huh?
[cuckoo]
Leave me out of this.
I didn't go cuckoo,
I'm just practicing,
you know in case I happen to
see the Queen of England while
she's here in New York.
I seen it on TV today.
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah no
Queen of England's gonna come
here to Brooklyn, come on.
Why not?
Ha, first of all
she's high to do.
I mean she's
fancy, she's a big wig,
she's the Queen, and she's
not gonna worry about little
people like you and me.
I mean especially,
little people like you.
[laughs]
Guys, they don't curtsey,
they bow like this watch.
You mean I gotta make a funny
face like that when I bow?
Only if you can't get back up.
Oh gee Mario!
Let me help you.
Wooooow.
You alright?
Mario I'll tell you the
truth, I really wish I could
meet the Queen!
Forget about it the
Queen's not gonna meet you,
come on!
Yea, I say old chap, that's
quite the bother isn't it?
Quite.
Quite.
Quite.
Quite.
[cuckoo]
Quiet!
[laughs]
Yo, yo!
It's the Mario Brothers
and plumbing's their game,
found the secret warp zone
while working on the drain,
lend the princess a
hand in the Mushroom Land.
Comin' atcha
with the plumbers,
you'll be hooked
on the brothers!
Noooooow, Evil Koopa and his
Troopas are up to misbehaving,
they kidnapped the princess;
Mushroom Land needs saving.
Abusing and confusing
everybody he discovers,
they can't help but be
hooked on the brothers!
Unh!
[Mario:] Plumber's
Log number 798.
We were traveling to the far
woods of the Mushroom Kingdom,
so the Princess could
visit her sick Grandmother.
But that sicky Koopa, was
busy making other plans.
There's the village!
And that's Pine the
woodcutter's cottage!
Grandma's place is just over the
river and through those woods.
Oh, I can't wait!
I can!
First we'd better
get inside by a fire,
before we turn
into pastasicles!
Hello?
Hello?
Pine?
Anybody home?
[Toad:] Look at that,
they're frozen solid!
Quick, Mario!
We have to build a fire
and melt these Mushrooms!
[Mario:] There isn't any wood.
Leave it to the Mushroom
of Might to chop some.
Well, if it isn't
Princess Goody Good,
the fungus, and her
plumbing punk friends.
Koopa!
Are you the heartless slime
who froze the poor woodcutter?
Save the insults Princess,
I'm putting ya all on ice.
Freeze in peace losers!
[laughs]
It makes me feel so
warm, to be so cold.
Let's Koop out, Troopas!
We've got more wood to steal,
and more Mushrooms to chill!
[laughs]
Yeow!
Don't bury me 'cause
I'm not froze yet!
I'll save ya guys!
Koopa stole everyone's wood,
and all the villagers are
frozen.
Oh, that crud Koopa.
If he's done anything
to Grandma--
oh my Mushroom, Grandma!
I've got to get to Grandma's
before it's too late!
Wait for us!
You guys have to stay here.
You have to chop wood, and
defrost the Mushroom villagers.
But Princess!
These woods aren't safe.
The Big Bad Wolf lives there.
Who's afraid of
a Big Bad Wolf?
I've got to get some wood to
Grandma before she freezes.
That Koopa is a
cold, callous wolf!
Koopa's no wolf, I'm a
wolf, and the moment I've been
waiting for is here at last.
Little Red Riding Hood is on her
way to Grandmother's house.
I'll just beat her to
Grandma's and she'll be mine,
mmm, yummy yummy, Little
Red Riding Hood in my tummy.
The Princess got defrosted!
Huh?
She's all alone in the woods
without those drain brain
plumbers for
protection, Your Nastiness.
I'll just beat her to
that old bag Grandma's,
and the Princess will be mine!
[laughs]
Mmm mmm!
It smells like
it's just about done!
[shivering]
Not a moment too soon either.
Oh my Mushroom!
What will I do when
the wood runs out?
[knocking]
Who is it?
[Koopa:] Opportunity knocking!
But I don't know
anyone named Opportunity.
[Koopa:] Uh, good
fortune, a turn of luck,
that which you've
been looking for!
Happy days are here again!
Open the door, you old bitty!
Telegram for
Grandmother Toadstool.
That's me!
I'm Grandmother Toadstool!
My goodness!
I've won a year's supply of
wood and all I have to do is
go to town to claim it!
Well, then you
better get going!
On your way now.
You old bat, you.
But a sick and elderly old
lady like me can't make that
long walk to town in the cold.
Ooh.
Here, it's
heated, and it's new!
Drive careful!
A-a-snowmobile?
But it's been years since
I've ridden a baby like this!
[panting]
What a run!
The old gray wolf
isn't what he used to be.
But it's all
gonna be worth it,
because, dinner is
about to be served.
[gasp]
[gasp]
Hey!
What are you doing here?
Me?
What are you doin' here?
I'm setting a trap for
Little Red Riding Hood.
Sorry fleabag, the
trap's already set!
[growling]
Get this wimpy
wolf outta here.
You're making a
big mistake, Koopa.
Who cares, Wolf?
Now, back to the business!
[knocking]
[Koopa:] Come in, Dearie.
Poor Grandma
doesn't sound too good.
Hello my darling sweetness!
Hello Grandmother.
My, what a
strange voice you have!
The better to
talk to you with,
my dear.
Grandma, what a
big snout you have!
Hey, watch it!
I mean, the better to
smell the goodies with.
Oh my mushroom!
Grandma, what
sharp teeth you have!
The better to eat you
with, you meddling Princess!
Yeow!
[laughs]
[gasp]
You should be
ashamed of yourself!
Breaking in here and wearing
my Grandmother's clothes!
Actually I think the
colour looks great on me.
Let's see how great my basket
of goodies looks on you!
Ow!
I didn't mind when you
insulted my nightgown,
but this is too much.
But the telegram said I'd
won a year's supply of wood.
Lady, we don't even have a
minute's supply of wood here.
Now who would pull a terrible
prank like that on an old lady?
[Mario, Luigi, Toad:] Koopa!
I'll bet he did it to get you
out of your cottage so he
could--
Capture my granddaughter!
You stay here Grandma,
we'll go rescue the Princess.
How do you start this thing?
Like that!
This is getting us nowhere!
You give up?
A Koopa never quits, he
just calls for reinforcements.
Koopa Pack!
Attack!
Ow!
Ow!
You'll never escape, Princess!
You sneaky Koopa!
Do us both a
favour and surrender!
Not a mushroom's
chance in soup!
See ya later, windbag!
Whoa!
I was ready to explode!
Whoa!
Huh?
This couldn't have worked
out better if I planned it!
[gasp]
Nowhere to run, and nowhere
to hide, Princess.
[Mario:] Not so fast, Koopa!
Put the plumber snake
away, garlic breath.
That's not fair!
Fair?
Fair?
You talking to me about
fair, mushroom mouth?
[laughs]
Check this out, Luigi.
Ow!
We gotcha now, Koopa!
Think again plumb scum!
I got you now!
You know sonny,
you're a real jerk!
You let my Grandmother go!
Wrong, Little Red
Whining Princess.
You're both coming with me!
What are we
gonna do now, Mario?
The snowmobile tracks
lead into that cave!
You don't think the real
Big Bad Wolf is in there,
do ya?
[laughs nervously]
Huh?
[roar]
Whoa!
Ahhh!
Hi Grandma Toadstool!
Hi Princess!
Oh, Grandma!
I'm so glad you're safe.
I shall have to send my spare
winter coats to the cleaners.
You know, you're not such
a Big Bad Wolf after all!
Oh believe me, I'm
big, and I'm bad.
I just don't like
that stoopa Koopa
cutting in on my territory.
Um, Princess,
ditch the red hood.
It isn't safe in the woods.
[laughter]
Well the firewood you took
back from Koopa should be
enough to keep the Mushroom
people cozy all winter long!
You know Dearie, I've
enjoyed your visit,
but do me one favor: next time
let me come and visit you.
[laughter]
They don't make 'em
the same way anymore.
[Man with British
accent:] Blimey!
The Queen has run off and
gotten lost in Brooklyn!
We must find her Highness, we
never should have turned round
to watch that girl drive by.
[ding dong]
Come in!
I say good citizens, may I
hide in your humble basement?
Yes, Your Royal Highness.
It would be an honour.
[Queen:] Oh thank you.
But, do get up.
The reason we ducked
in here, is because,
we're sick and tired, of
being treated like royalty.
Well, I understand
that Your Highness but,
what do you mean by we?
Oh that.
Well since I am
the Queen you see,
I really must
use the royal we.
Well, ok Your Highness,
right through the door,
and down the hall.
Your Majesty, if there's
anything that we can do,
please just name it.
There is one thing:
would you let me be
one of the common folk?
Just for one day.
Your Majesty.
Yo!
Your Majesty, what should
someone do to feel like a King
or Queen?
If you want the royal
treatment just watch these
scenes from the
next, Legend of Zelda.
This is the
Triforce of Wisdom Link,
the evil Wizard Ganon
has the Triforce of Power.
[laughter]
[Zelda:] Whoever gets both
Triforces will rule this land
forever, you
must help me Link!
Hey, for you Zelda?
Anything!
Ah!
Oh!
[roaring]
Ahh!
I don't know about this place,
but these monsters
are real familiar.
Get back Princess!
Huh?
Where are all these
monsters coming from?
Ooh, lunch is ready.
Oh great, what
is lunch Queenie?
It's the only
dish I can prepare.
It's very British, and very
Italian: fish and chips pizza.
Mmmmm.
Oh I say, I'm royally pooped.
Well no wonder you
mopped the floor,
you washed and
ironed our clothing,
and you re-shingled the roof!
Yea, why don't you sit down
and put your feet up Queenie?
Well I must say
I've enjoyed this but,
as you boys say
forget about it.
I'm afraid I've lived as
a commoner long enough.
Oh but first I shall
perform a short ceremony,
to thank you for sharing
your extremely common home.
Kneel before me.
Yes Ma'am.
I the Queen of England and
the Royal Cooker of Pizza,
do hereby dub ye, Sir
Mario, and Sir Luigi.
What an honour.
Thank you, Your
Mountainous Majesty.
[ding dong]
Come in!
Liz, I've been looking
all over Brooklyn for you.
You were very naughty
running away like that,
and I don't appreciate that.
Gentlemen, I hope the Queen
hasn't been too much trouble
for ya today.
Oh no, no, not at
all, not at all.
Come on Your Highness, it's
time we go back to the home,
we're having
tapioca pudding tonight!
That's your favourite!
Goodbye Queen, goodbye.
Well, so Luigi, she might
not have been a good Queen,
but she sure makes a
mean fish and chips pizza.
[laughter]
You got it Sir Mario.
Thank you Sir Luigi.
Have a piece.
'Til next time
everybody, do the Mario!
Do the Mario! ♪
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go! ♪
Do the Mario! ♪
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
You've got it! ♪
It's the Mario! ♪
Do the Mario! ♪
Swing your arms
from side to side, ♪
come on, it's time to go! ♪
Do the Mario! ♪
Take one step,
and then again. ♪
Let's do the Mario,
all together now! ♪
Come on now, it's
just like that! ♪♪