Dirty Sexy Money s02e01 Episode Script
The Birthday Present
And it has traffic backed up on the West Side Highway.
The red-carpet event was thought to be a fundraiser for Patrick Darling's Senate campaign, but it turns out, it's just a birthday party for their family lawyer, Nick George.
And that's your weather and traffic.
Mr.
George, how did you do it? Will Tripp be putting his power behind Patrick's Senate campaign? Yes, but to what extent remains in question.
Nick, tell us, as the Darling family lawyer, how were you able to broker this historic reconciliation between father and son? Well, it was quite an adventure.
Thank you.
Pushing down on me Pressing down on you No man ask for Here's the birthday boy.
Letitia Darling, you look beautiful.
How are you? Sorry, we didn't have time to plan anything too fancy.
Oh.
Well, I'm sure this'll be just fine.
- Happy birthday, Nick.
- Thank you.
Have you seen my wife? - Lisa's not with you? - No.
No.
If you'll excuse me.
Patrick, where's that wife of yours? Ellers not alcoholically indisposed again, is she? No, Mother.
I'm sure she's just running a few moments late.
No, Brian used to be a minister.
He was one for 10 years.
But he's working for me now.
Got a little too much sun, huh? Yeah, Paddy and I went sailing yesterday, off our place in the Hamptons.
Hey, Nick.
I want you to meet an old friend of mine.
Hal Matheson, Nick George.
- Nice to meet you.
- Your dad was a hell of a guy.
He'd be so proud if he were still with us.
Thank you.
Hey, Brian.
You haven't seen Lisa, have you? No, but if you see a waiter.
People on streets It's the terror of knowing what this world is about - Hello, princess.
- Hi, Daddy.
You got something for me? A kiss and this.
Pressure on people People on streets The people on the edge of the night And love dares you to change our way of Caring about ourselves Hey.
- You made it.
- I did.
So, are we okay? We're okay.
Can the birthday boy come up here, please? - You ready? - Mmm-hmm.
Nick, what can I say? Never before.
Well, maybe once before, and I'm thinking of Nick's dad, Dutch, has one man done so much to hold a family together.
- What's this? - That is the key to that.
That boat.
It's yours.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
What's going on? NYPD.
Prepare to be boarded.
- What's happening, Nick? - Nobody move.
What did you do, Nick? What the hell did you do? Tripp and Letitia want to throw me a birthday party.
It'll be small and simple, just us and the Darlings.
The Darlings don't do small and simple.
Well, then it'll be large and complicated, but we have to do it.
- Where are you going, all dressed up? - Gallery hunting.
Nick, I was really hoping it would be just us for your birthday this year.
All right, here's what we're gonna do.
We're gonna get a sitter for tonight, and we're gonna have our dinner, just us.
Thank you.
But tomorrow, we're gonna go yachting with the Darlings.
- Semi-formal.
- Perfect.
I'm looking semi-forward to it.
All right, I have got to go.
Six months of mending fences between Patrick and Tripp are about to finally pay off.
- Must be some fence.
- You said it yourself, Lisa.
The Darlings don't do small and simple.
If you don't want me involved in your Senate campaign, son, just say so.
Of course I want you involved, Dad.
But you don't know how to be involved without creating an air of constant judgment and pervasive meddling.
Patrick, we just made headway.
Let me guess where you get those ideas from.
Simon Elder.
I get my ideas from my own mind, Dad.
I severed ties with Simon a long time ago.
Ever since you left this family's sphere of influence, your life has spun completely out of control.
Out of your control, perhaps! Listen.
You're a passionate family.
You're a family of strong opinions, so naturally sometimes you're gonna get into conflict.
But at the end of the day, you're still a family.
You love each other, you're there for each other.
- His campaign is in a shambles! - We're still ahead in the polls! Not for long, if that wife of yours keeps showing up at every campaign speech, at every fundraiser, three sheets to the wind.
The rigors of public life have taken their toll, yes.
Maybe it's just that she's trying to deaden the pain of having lost you to your vanished Carmelita.
That's it, Nick.
We're done here.
Wait a second.
Everybody, just calm down.
Now I have worked.
We've all worked the last six months to make this moment happen.
- This moment is over.
- Don't be a fool, Paddy.
Because when you come back to me asking for my assistance, asking for my acceptance.
You don't get it, Dad, do you? I'm never going to ask you for anything ever again.
Lisa! Jeremy Darling, stalker.
Is that the headline you're longing to read on TMZ? What do you mean? I'm just tooling around.
This just-showing-up thing was cute the first 17 times.
Now it's just starting to get weird.
Cut me some slacks.
I can't stop thinking about you.
Ever since that night we kissed.
That was six months ago! And we didn't kiss.
You kissed me.
You kissed me back, a little.
I mean, it wasrt The Notebook, but I distinctly recall a kiss back.
Look, marriages go through phases, and when I let you kiss me, mine was in a bad one.
It's in a better one now.
Can we have dinner tonight? I am having dinner at Etienne with Nick, my husband.
And we, you and me, are not happening.
For dinner or anything.
Please leave me alone.
And get a helmet.
That was amazing.
- I'm all discombobulated.
- Yeah.
Would you make me some orange juice, please, with a little gin in it? Sure.
- Actually, hold the orange juice.
- All right.
Hey, there's a fundraiser tonight at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens.
I'm giving them a $ 10 million grant to do research in the rainforest.
- You wanna go? - Sure.
Sounds planty.
I just have to make an appearance at home first.
Ah.
So Tripp still has no idea his daughter's sleeping with the enemy, huh? No, he's completely clueless still.
Don't be so sure.
People figure things out.
What are you doing? Going through your stuff.
What's the story with this one? Well, when I first came to New York, I wasrt sure if I'd ever amount to anything.
- Oh.
- So, I saw that in a shop window, and it reminded me of the ugly duckling, you know, that turned into a swan.
It's not won'th much, but it's a reminder of a simpler time.
That's sweet.
- What? - I love you.
Wow.
Thank you.
I think you're really neat, too.
- Good afternoon.
- Well, I hope so, Daisy, 'cause the morning monumentally sucked.
- Oh.
Karen Darling's here to see you.
- Hi, Nick.
- Karen, what can I do for you? - Well, for starters, close the door.
- Why? - I have to give you your present.
Happy birthday! - Karen, put your dress back on.
- I brought you some grappa.
No, the nudity was enough.
Get dressed.
All right! Jeez.
Grumpy Gus! Would you at least pour me a drink? Thank you.
What the hell is going on? Why you doing this? Simon told me he loved me.
- You're still seeing Simon? - Yeah, I'm snooping on him for Daddy.
- Thanks for keeping me in the loop.
- You know what, Nick? When you have a problem, I'm always there for you.
- Sorry.
- Okay.
What's the problem, Karen? Simors falling for me, and I kind of feel, like, I don't know.
- Bad.
- Ah.
- Yeah.
- So remove yourself.
- Well, that's what I'm trying to do.
- Yeah? By showing up here naked and coming on to me? - You're my exit ramp.
- No, I am not an exit ramp, Karen.
I'm just your old boyfriend that you run to when you start to have feelings for anyone else.
Yeah, that's kind of what I mean by "exit ramp," Nick.
Listen, if you want out of this predicament, which you got yourself into, you're gonna have to do it yourself.
I'm not gonna kiss you out of it.
Well, I was hoping for a little more than a kiss.
Well, you're not gonna get anything, so pull back, step out, absent yourself.
You have choices.
Wow! Okay.
Thanks for understanding, Nick.
Oh, hey, happy birthday.
- I hate this.
We're almost done.
- We could wreck it and start over.
Ate logo to you, too.
What's your problem, Cruella? That was the Brazilian consulate.
There's still this strangely unspecified holdup with our visas.
Shrimp doesn't mind.
Go rub a crystal.
This was supposed to be a one-week visit, Brian, stretched out to nearly four.
You're telling me you had nothing to do with this? Why is it so important that you get back to Brazil? I mean, why are you even living there at all? - Andrea.
- Oh.
Hi, Tripp.
- Your stay continues to be pleasant? - More long than pleasant.
Brian, could I.
May I steal you away? I need you to talk to Ellen.
Why? You need me to get her recipe for Long Island Iced Tea? No, I want you to counsel her.
- Counsel? - Yes.
Patrick may no longer think of himself as an extension of this family, but the rest of the world does.
And his wife.
It's obvious that Ellen is terribly unappy, but that unappiness is turning her into a public embarrassment.
I left the church and took this job so I wouldn't have to smile and nod and pretend to care about other people's problems.
When you sent me to Munich to fire all those people and close down that factory, that was fun.
Are you telling.
Are you saying no? Yeah.
I'm saying no.
Well, yes.
Thank you for your frankness.
I count on it.
It is the biggest dead-end in the world, Mr.
Darling.
This Carmelita, this so-called lady friend of yours, she doesn't want to be found.
To have her just out there.
Somewhere.
Not knowing.
It just.
It kills me.
You want my advice, Mr.
Darling? Go home to your pretty wife.
My pretty wife, Mr.
Cameron, is a belligerent drunk, who calls me names in front of my children and takes swings at me in public.
That is, when she's not online ordering single-barrel bourbon by the case.
Keep looking.
Never give up.
- Where the hell have you been? - Good evening, Foster Brooks.
Answer me.
You were looking for her again, werert you? Her.
I should say "it.
" I've been out campaigning and working at my office, Ellen.
God, you disgust me.
You know that? - I disgust you? Really? - Yeah.
You're a pervert.
I'd forbid our children to be alone with you, if you werert their father.
I could still do it.
What's the matter with me, Pat? What did I ever do to you? Well, you shot me in the leg, Ellen.
Ring a bell? God, you smell like a still.
I'm going to take a shower, and try to wash whatever's left of this marriage off my body.
Try not to fall down.
Hit me.
Jeremy Darling.
What if I told you I've been coming around here every night for the past two weeks, waiting for you to show up? - I wouldn't believe you.
- Oh, well.
- Do I know you? - Does anybody really know anyone? Drink, sir.
- Should I ask about the girl? - How'd you know about the girl? Come on.
There's always a girl.
I over-extended myself heart-wise.
You know, I put myself out there, but she just doesn't want me.
If you want my advice, don't take no for an answer.
Sometimes a girl just wants a guy to push.
Makes her feel pretty.
Thanks for the drink.
Mirror, mirror on the wall Who's the greatest of them all? 'Cause I came, I saw I conquered all - What the hell are you doing? - You are making me do this.
Look what you and your perversion has turned me into! Ellen, stop it! You have a perfectly good woman who loves you, but no! You'd rather be with that shape-shifter! - Are you crazy? - You're never gonna find her.
You know that, don't you? You will never find her, ever! Oh, my God, Ellen.
What did you do? I had her taken care of! Oh, my God.
Sweetheart? Ellen? Baby? What have you done? What have you done? Why did you do this? Hello? I need help.
Help.
I'm here, Paddy.
What can I do? I promise, Lisa, I'll be there.
But what you don't get is I'm fine with you saying you can't.
I can.
I promise.
Look, I just got to Patrick's.
I'm gonna see what they need.
I'll be out of here in 15 minutes.
- I just wanna see you, you know? - Lisa, it's my birthday.
I'll be there.
- Mr.
George.
- Thank you, Clark.
What the hell happened here? Somebody start talking.
Now.
Finally.
I was just about.
Jeremy, what are you doing here? I heard you were flying solo.
I thought I'd pull alongside and refuel.
How did you know I was alone? Don't sit down.
I called Francois, the maitre d'.
He's an old coke connection.
Get up.
I was gonna have a bottle sent over for the two of you lovebirds, but he said there was only one, and that you were looking kind of blue.
Nick is going to be here any moment.
When he arrives, I will totally flee the scene.
- No.
- Five minutes.
Seven, tops.
I promise.
Possibly 10, if we're vibing.
I get that it was an accident, Patrick.
I get that you didn't lay a hand on her, but we still have to call the police.
Now.
I completely agree.
If Paddy had been able to tell me on the phone what had transpired, I would have called them myself, right then.
- Okay.
All right.
Let's do it.
- Nick.
Tripp, every moment we delay increases the appearance.
I know, that's what I'm thinking about.
About how this will look and the toll that it will take.
- On what, the election? - No, on the family.
The kids.
You know what the press is gonna do with this.
- What are you asking me to do? - I'm not asking you to do anything.
Although you do make a very strong case about the election.
I mean, if this gets out, that'll be done.
Did you seriously expect me to show up here, move her body, put it somewhere else, set it on fire, and make it all look like an accident? That's what Dutch would have done.
Look where it got him, Pat, a permanent address at the bottom of Long Island Sound.
- Nick.
- What? This isn't some case of me running down to city hall and fixing a parking ticket.
You do realize that? This is a womars life.
And a mars, and a family's.
It's many things, Nick.
Many.
All right, look.
If I were you, I'd call the police.
Once this situation becomes a legal matter, I hope you'll call me, as your family lawyer, to do my part.
But right now, this isn't a legal situation, it's a moral one.
And as of right now, it's not mine, it's yours.
Good night.
What are we gonna do? Well, there's only one thing we can do.
We must follow Nick's sage advice.
- Hey.
- Hey.
The car's waiting for us downstairs.
You're going dressed like that to the benefit? Oh, yeah.
No, I'm not going.
Okay.
- Wild guess? - I'm tired.
That's it.
That's all.
Karen, you know that it's okay if you don't want to say, "I love you.
" I mean, that's what this is all about, right? - No.
Maybe a little, yeah.
- Okay.
You know, I could have any woman in New York, but I've chosen you because I enjoy being with you, so I said it.
You don't have to say it back.
But, while we're at it and we're being honest, let's just get it all out on the table.
I know why you're seeing me, and I know it's for one reason and one reason only, and that is to gather dirt for Daddy.
- It started out that way, but it's.
- Let's cut to the chase.
Karen, I made my first fortune on a prism, a computer processor that can read information on waves of light.
Now, in six months, I'm gonna roll this out.
- What is that? - A fuel.
Clean-burning.
Non toxic.
This is gonna do for transportation what my prism did for information.
It's gonna change everything.
It's yours.
I want you to take this to your father.
Let him hand it over to his chemists.
They are gonna have fun figuring this out.
And your father will make more money than even he could ever imagine.
I'll lose millions in R&D, but, hey, Daddy's happy, right? Because that's what this is all about, right? Keeping Daddy happy.
Oh, my God.
We really did not need to drink that whole second bottle.
I respectfully disagree.
A high-end buzz becomes you.
Oh, Jeremy.
Jeremy, you saved me from a night full of self-pity.
Thank you.
- But this is where it ends.
- Meaning? Meaning, don't try and kiss me.
I wasrt going to.
- Damn it, Jeremy.
Why do you do that? - Because I think you're beautiful.
Come on, Lise.
You got stood up for a birthday dinner you were trying to throw for someone else.
You're the prettiest girl in New York, and you know you want me to kiss you.
Or you want to kiss me, whichever.
I don't.
I know you are unable to believe me when I say it, but I really don't.
Nick! Nick! Nick! Nick, wait! - Let's go.
- Nick, wait! Wait! Nick! Maybe my family and your family are just a bad combination, you know? - You ever think of that? - It's crossed my mind.
Your mom and my dad, my wife and your brother.
You and me.
I mean, there are people all over the world whose interactions are simple and clean and generally lead to good things happening, right? Yeah, well, here's to them.
- I'm sorry.
- About what? Just the way I talked to you when you showed up here naked.
Oh.
When I said you have choices.
'Cause maybe we don't, really.
You know, maybe Lisa doesn't.
Maybe Jeremy doesn't.
Maybe you don't, and maybe I don't.
- Maybe Patrick doesn't.
- Patrick? I just mean that maybe it's all just chemistry, you know? You know, you just.
You want what you want, and you can't stop wanting it.
Maybe it's that simple.
Yeah, you're drunk.
And you're beautiful.
- And you're thinking about Simon.
- I am.
I can't talk right now, Lisa.
No, I'm sorry, it's nothing.
Everything's fine.
No.
No, it's nothing.
Yeah, I can be there.
I'll see you then.
- Who was that? - That was your father.
- Oh.
- 8:00 tomorrow morning.
I've been summoned.
What? You and I are not a bad combination, Nick.
It's just, it's bad timing.
Hey, Mom.
Where the hell is my son? He and Andrea just left.
I begged her to stay and say goodbye, but she said that they could still catch the flight.
Their visas came through? Yes.
She said she got a phone call from the consulate out of the blue.
Next thing I knew, she was grabbing little Brian, along with the luggage, and, to be honest, a few of our best towels.
- Where's Tripp? - Why? Do you want him to intervene? He already did.
Excellent, Clark.
Well done.
Thank you.
- You wanted to see me? - Yeah.
Please.
Do you know how many men died building the Brooklyn Bridge? - No idea.
- Twenty-seven.
Twenty-seven for a bridge that every day more than a million people go back and forth on.
So, this is your way of saying that Ellen was expendable? No.
No, no, no.
Just that, for every venture, there are costs.
People aren't costs, Tripp.
They're people.
Ellen contrived a life that can be best described as a venal venture, in which, regrettably, she did not have the strength to play her role.
In the end, she resorted to drink, and finally, last night, once again, to violence.
She had none of the patience and grace that make your marriage to Lisa such a blessing.
Yeah, I'm a lucky man.
All I asked you to do was to help protect my son and his innocent children from what would surely have become an immensely destructive misunderstanding.
What do you want from me, Tripp? I want you to allow yourself to become a part of this family.
And I know we're not perfect, we're messy.
But you yourself said that, at the end of the day, we love each other.
Let yourself be a part of that.
You are a son to me.
Let us love you.
Dad, I'm gonna have to bail on Nick's party.
- Hey, Nick.
- Hi, Jeremy.
You.
What? I should go.
Jeremy.
Wait, wait, wait.
There's one thing.
I will be at my office if you need anything else taken care of.
- You ready to talk? - I'm ready to listen.
I was drunk, Nick, and you left me waiting there when I.
Are you seriously defending the idea that you were kissing Jeremy? Are you seriously not willing to forgive me when you've done the same thing with Karen? Oh, so we're even now? Is that the moral of the story at the end of the day? That's what this marriage is? You tell me what this marriage is.
Doesrt it ever occur to you that you are headed down the exact same path your dad went down? Little by little, they're pulling you in.
I'm losing you.
You're losing me? You're kissing Jeremy, and you're losing me? We're losing us.
You know it's true.
I know when you took this job you thought you could walk this razor's edge all the time, between their values and ours, between their family and ours, but someday, Nick, you're gonna have to make a choice.
And when that day comes, I hope you choose us.
You're coming, right? Lise, you're coming to the party? - I'm going for a walk.
- Lisa! It's because I wouldn't do it.
I wouldn't go to Ellen and talk to her and tell her to sack up and play Darling ball, so you disappeared my family.
I had nothing to do with it.
- You're full of crap.
- No, I am not, actually.
If I had known events were unfolding that way with their visa, I would have jumped at the chance to help.
If you had come to me.
That's what family does.
We help each other.
Well, I'm sorry I didn't talk to Ellen.
If you had taken the time to let her air her troubled mind, things might have gone differently.
What are you talking about? It would be a great help to your brother Patrick and to me, too, if you could agree that you spent the past two days sailing with him out at the Hamptons.
Why? Will you do it or not? Sure.
Why the hell not? And spend 10 minutes in the tanning bed, before we go to Nick's party.
Well, you look a trifle pale.
Well, look who's here.
Arert you going to Nick's party? I'm running late.
He'll live.
So? What'd your daddy think of my little concoction? I didn't give it to him, and I'm not going to.
- You sure about this? - Yeah.
Look, my whole life, there's only been one man who ever moved me.
You know, who made me feel like I was actually living.
- Nick.
- Yeah.
But something's happening to me, Simon, with you.
I don't know what it is.
You know, maybe I'm growing up.
Maybe.
Maybe you're just amazing.
I just.
I know that I don't want to let you go.
What you do to me, it scares me a little, you know? But I like it.
I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go to the shindig.
Hey.
- Come after.
- I will.
Yeah, it's me.
We've got her.
Let me guess.
- It's a long story.
- Make it short.
I'm a mistake.
Ouch.
- I'm always the mistake.
- Always? So, since you're such a master of mistakes, is it a mistake you came back here? Probably.
Is it a mistake letting me stand next to you? It's kind of hard to say, I guess.
Would it be a mistake to take me to that limo you've got parked outside, and.
Only one way to find out.
- This is definitely not a mistake.
- Yeah.
I'm standing in front of Valhalla, the legendary rural compound of America's first family, the Darlings.
Mr.
Clark! Mr.
Clark! Look.
Valued at over $30 million, the property, which was once the home of legendary gangster Bugsy Siegel The country house.
is completely destroyed.
- Should we call Mr.
Darling? - No.
Let's not ruin the party.
The red-carpet event was thought to be a fundraiser for Patrick Darling's Senate campaign, but it turns out, it's just a birthday party for their family lawyer, Nick George.
And that's your weather and traffic.
Mr.
George, how were you able to broker this historic reconciliation between father and son? Well, it was quite an adventure.
Here's the birthday boy.
Letitia Darling, you look beautiful.
How are you? - Happy birthday, Nick.
- Thanks.
Have you seen my wife? - Lisa's not with you? - No.
No.
If you'll excuse me.
Patrick, where's that wife of yours? I'm sure she's just running a few moments late.
No, Brian left the ministry.
Got a little too much sun, huh? Yeah, Paddy and I went sailing yesterday, off our place in the Hamptons.
Hey, Nick.
I want you to meet an old friend of mine.
Hal Matheson, Nick George.
- Nice to meet you.
- Your dad was a hell of a guy.
He'd be so proud if he were still with us.
Thank you.
Chippir around Kick my brains around the floor These are the days it never rains but it pours - You got something for me? - Yes, Daddy.
A kiss and this.
And loves dares you to change our way of Caring about ourselves Hey.
- You made it.
- I did.
So, are we okay? We're okay.
Can the birthday boy come up here, please? Never before.
Well, maybe once before, and I'm thinking of Nick's dad, Dutch, has one man done so much to hold a family together.
Happy birthday.
- What's this? - That is the key to that.
That boat.
Thank you.
- What's going on? - I don't know.
N YPD.
Prepare to be boarded.
- What's happening, Nick? - I have no idea.
What did you do, Nick? What the hell did you do? Nobody move.
Prepare to be boarded.
Stand back, please.
You ratted me out? - What did you do, Nick? - I didn't do anything.
Stay back, please.
Sorry to have to do this, Mr.
Attorney General.
I got my orders.
Detective Larrabee, what seems to be the problem? Murder, Nick, in the first degree.
Here's an arrest warrant.
Letitia Darling, you're under arrest for the murder of Dutch George.
What? This is outrageous.
You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
- Patrick! - Nick! You have the right to have an attorney present.
Help.
Nick, help.
If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you.
Tripp, are you there? Mrs.
Darling, do you understand these rights as I've spoken them to you? Nick, help!
The red-carpet event was thought to be a fundraiser for Patrick Darling's Senate campaign, but it turns out, it's just a birthday party for their family lawyer, Nick George.
And that's your weather and traffic.
Mr.
George, how did you do it? Will Tripp be putting his power behind Patrick's Senate campaign? Yes, but to what extent remains in question.
Nick, tell us, as the Darling family lawyer, how were you able to broker this historic reconciliation between father and son? Well, it was quite an adventure.
Thank you.
Pushing down on me Pressing down on you No man ask for Here's the birthday boy.
Letitia Darling, you look beautiful.
How are you? Sorry, we didn't have time to plan anything too fancy.
Oh.
Well, I'm sure this'll be just fine.
- Happy birthday, Nick.
- Thank you.
Have you seen my wife? - Lisa's not with you? - No.
No.
If you'll excuse me.
Patrick, where's that wife of yours? Ellers not alcoholically indisposed again, is she? No, Mother.
I'm sure she's just running a few moments late.
No, Brian used to be a minister.
He was one for 10 years.
But he's working for me now.
Got a little too much sun, huh? Yeah, Paddy and I went sailing yesterday, off our place in the Hamptons.
Hey, Nick.
I want you to meet an old friend of mine.
Hal Matheson, Nick George.
- Nice to meet you.
- Your dad was a hell of a guy.
He'd be so proud if he were still with us.
Thank you.
Hey, Brian.
You haven't seen Lisa, have you? No, but if you see a waiter.
People on streets It's the terror of knowing what this world is about - Hello, princess.
- Hi, Daddy.
You got something for me? A kiss and this.
Pressure on people People on streets The people on the edge of the night And love dares you to change our way of Caring about ourselves Hey.
- You made it.
- I did.
So, are we okay? We're okay.
Can the birthday boy come up here, please? - You ready? - Mmm-hmm.
Nick, what can I say? Never before.
Well, maybe once before, and I'm thinking of Nick's dad, Dutch, has one man done so much to hold a family together.
- What's this? - That is the key to that.
That boat.
It's yours.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
What's going on? NYPD.
Prepare to be boarded.
- What's happening, Nick? - Nobody move.
What did you do, Nick? What the hell did you do? Tripp and Letitia want to throw me a birthday party.
It'll be small and simple, just us and the Darlings.
The Darlings don't do small and simple.
Well, then it'll be large and complicated, but we have to do it.
- Where are you going, all dressed up? - Gallery hunting.
Nick, I was really hoping it would be just us for your birthday this year.
All right, here's what we're gonna do.
We're gonna get a sitter for tonight, and we're gonna have our dinner, just us.
Thank you.
But tomorrow, we're gonna go yachting with the Darlings.
- Semi-formal.
- Perfect.
I'm looking semi-forward to it.
All right, I have got to go.
Six months of mending fences between Patrick and Tripp are about to finally pay off.
- Must be some fence.
- You said it yourself, Lisa.
The Darlings don't do small and simple.
If you don't want me involved in your Senate campaign, son, just say so.
Of course I want you involved, Dad.
But you don't know how to be involved without creating an air of constant judgment and pervasive meddling.
Patrick, we just made headway.
Let me guess where you get those ideas from.
Simon Elder.
I get my ideas from my own mind, Dad.
I severed ties with Simon a long time ago.
Ever since you left this family's sphere of influence, your life has spun completely out of control.
Out of your control, perhaps! Listen.
You're a passionate family.
You're a family of strong opinions, so naturally sometimes you're gonna get into conflict.
But at the end of the day, you're still a family.
You love each other, you're there for each other.
- His campaign is in a shambles! - We're still ahead in the polls! Not for long, if that wife of yours keeps showing up at every campaign speech, at every fundraiser, three sheets to the wind.
The rigors of public life have taken their toll, yes.
Maybe it's just that she's trying to deaden the pain of having lost you to your vanished Carmelita.
That's it, Nick.
We're done here.
Wait a second.
Everybody, just calm down.
Now I have worked.
We've all worked the last six months to make this moment happen.
- This moment is over.
- Don't be a fool, Paddy.
Because when you come back to me asking for my assistance, asking for my acceptance.
You don't get it, Dad, do you? I'm never going to ask you for anything ever again.
Lisa! Jeremy Darling, stalker.
Is that the headline you're longing to read on TMZ? What do you mean? I'm just tooling around.
This just-showing-up thing was cute the first 17 times.
Now it's just starting to get weird.
Cut me some slacks.
I can't stop thinking about you.
Ever since that night we kissed.
That was six months ago! And we didn't kiss.
You kissed me.
You kissed me back, a little.
I mean, it wasrt The Notebook, but I distinctly recall a kiss back.
Look, marriages go through phases, and when I let you kiss me, mine was in a bad one.
It's in a better one now.
Can we have dinner tonight? I am having dinner at Etienne with Nick, my husband.
And we, you and me, are not happening.
For dinner or anything.
Please leave me alone.
And get a helmet.
That was amazing.
- I'm all discombobulated.
- Yeah.
Would you make me some orange juice, please, with a little gin in it? Sure.
- Actually, hold the orange juice.
- All right.
Hey, there's a fundraiser tonight at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens.
I'm giving them a $ 10 million grant to do research in the rainforest.
- You wanna go? - Sure.
Sounds planty.
I just have to make an appearance at home first.
Ah.
So Tripp still has no idea his daughter's sleeping with the enemy, huh? No, he's completely clueless still.
Don't be so sure.
People figure things out.
What are you doing? Going through your stuff.
What's the story with this one? Well, when I first came to New York, I wasrt sure if I'd ever amount to anything.
- Oh.
- So, I saw that in a shop window, and it reminded me of the ugly duckling, you know, that turned into a swan.
It's not won'th much, but it's a reminder of a simpler time.
That's sweet.
- What? - I love you.
Wow.
Thank you.
I think you're really neat, too.
- Good afternoon.
- Well, I hope so, Daisy, 'cause the morning monumentally sucked.
- Oh.
Karen Darling's here to see you.
- Hi, Nick.
- Karen, what can I do for you? - Well, for starters, close the door.
- Why? - I have to give you your present.
Happy birthday! - Karen, put your dress back on.
- I brought you some grappa.
No, the nudity was enough.
Get dressed.
All right! Jeez.
Grumpy Gus! Would you at least pour me a drink? Thank you.
What the hell is going on? Why you doing this? Simon told me he loved me.
- You're still seeing Simon? - Yeah, I'm snooping on him for Daddy.
- Thanks for keeping me in the loop.
- You know what, Nick? When you have a problem, I'm always there for you.
- Sorry.
- Okay.
What's the problem, Karen? Simors falling for me, and I kind of feel, like, I don't know.
- Bad.
- Ah.
- Yeah.
- So remove yourself.
- Well, that's what I'm trying to do.
- Yeah? By showing up here naked and coming on to me? - You're my exit ramp.
- No, I am not an exit ramp, Karen.
I'm just your old boyfriend that you run to when you start to have feelings for anyone else.
Yeah, that's kind of what I mean by "exit ramp," Nick.
Listen, if you want out of this predicament, which you got yourself into, you're gonna have to do it yourself.
I'm not gonna kiss you out of it.
Well, I was hoping for a little more than a kiss.
Well, you're not gonna get anything, so pull back, step out, absent yourself.
You have choices.
Wow! Okay.
Thanks for understanding, Nick.
Oh, hey, happy birthday.
- I hate this.
We're almost done.
- We could wreck it and start over.
Ate logo to you, too.
What's your problem, Cruella? That was the Brazilian consulate.
There's still this strangely unspecified holdup with our visas.
Shrimp doesn't mind.
Go rub a crystal.
This was supposed to be a one-week visit, Brian, stretched out to nearly four.
You're telling me you had nothing to do with this? Why is it so important that you get back to Brazil? I mean, why are you even living there at all? - Andrea.
- Oh.
Hi, Tripp.
- Your stay continues to be pleasant? - More long than pleasant.
Brian, could I.
May I steal you away? I need you to talk to Ellen.
Why? You need me to get her recipe for Long Island Iced Tea? No, I want you to counsel her.
- Counsel? - Yes.
Patrick may no longer think of himself as an extension of this family, but the rest of the world does.
And his wife.
It's obvious that Ellen is terribly unappy, but that unappiness is turning her into a public embarrassment.
I left the church and took this job so I wouldn't have to smile and nod and pretend to care about other people's problems.
When you sent me to Munich to fire all those people and close down that factory, that was fun.
Are you telling.
Are you saying no? Yeah.
I'm saying no.
Well, yes.
Thank you for your frankness.
I count on it.
It is the biggest dead-end in the world, Mr.
Darling.
This Carmelita, this so-called lady friend of yours, she doesn't want to be found.
To have her just out there.
Somewhere.
Not knowing.
It just.
It kills me.
You want my advice, Mr.
Darling? Go home to your pretty wife.
My pretty wife, Mr.
Cameron, is a belligerent drunk, who calls me names in front of my children and takes swings at me in public.
That is, when she's not online ordering single-barrel bourbon by the case.
Keep looking.
Never give up.
- Where the hell have you been? - Good evening, Foster Brooks.
Answer me.
You were looking for her again, werert you? Her.
I should say "it.
" I've been out campaigning and working at my office, Ellen.
God, you disgust me.
You know that? - I disgust you? Really? - Yeah.
You're a pervert.
I'd forbid our children to be alone with you, if you werert their father.
I could still do it.
What's the matter with me, Pat? What did I ever do to you? Well, you shot me in the leg, Ellen.
Ring a bell? God, you smell like a still.
I'm going to take a shower, and try to wash whatever's left of this marriage off my body.
Try not to fall down.
Hit me.
Jeremy Darling.
What if I told you I've been coming around here every night for the past two weeks, waiting for you to show up? - I wouldn't believe you.
- Oh, well.
- Do I know you? - Does anybody really know anyone? Drink, sir.
- Should I ask about the girl? - How'd you know about the girl? Come on.
There's always a girl.
I over-extended myself heart-wise.
You know, I put myself out there, but she just doesn't want me.
If you want my advice, don't take no for an answer.
Sometimes a girl just wants a guy to push.
Makes her feel pretty.
Thanks for the drink.
Mirror, mirror on the wall Who's the greatest of them all? 'Cause I came, I saw I conquered all - What the hell are you doing? - You are making me do this.
Look what you and your perversion has turned me into! Ellen, stop it! You have a perfectly good woman who loves you, but no! You'd rather be with that shape-shifter! - Are you crazy? - You're never gonna find her.
You know that, don't you? You will never find her, ever! Oh, my God, Ellen.
What did you do? I had her taken care of! Oh, my God.
Sweetheart? Ellen? Baby? What have you done? What have you done? Why did you do this? Hello? I need help.
Help.
I'm here, Paddy.
What can I do? I promise, Lisa, I'll be there.
But what you don't get is I'm fine with you saying you can't.
I can.
I promise.
Look, I just got to Patrick's.
I'm gonna see what they need.
I'll be out of here in 15 minutes.
- I just wanna see you, you know? - Lisa, it's my birthday.
I'll be there.
- Mr.
George.
- Thank you, Clark.
What the hell happened here? Somebody start talking.
Now.
Finally.
I was just about.
Jeremy, what are you doing here? I heard you were flying solo.
I thought I'd pull alongside and refuel.
How did you know I was alone? Don't sit down.
I called Francois, the maitre d'.
He's an old coke connection.
Get up.
I was gonna have a bottle sent over for the two of you lovebirds, but he said there was only one, and that you were looking kind of blue.
Nick is going to be here any moment.
When he arrives, I will totally flee the scene.
- No.
- Five minutes.
Seven, tops.
I promise.
Possibly 10, if we're vibing.
I get that it was an accident, Patrick.
I get that you didn't lay a hand on her, but we still have to call the police.
Now.
I completely agree.
If Paddy had been able to tell me on the phone what had transpired, I would have called them myself, right then.
- Okay.
All right.
Let's do it.
- Nick.
Tripp, every moment we delay increases the appearance.
I know, that's what I'm thinking about.
About how this will look and the toll that it will take.
- On what, the election? - No, on the family.
The kids.
You know what the press is gonna do with this.
- What are you asking me to do? - I'm not asking you to do anything.
Although you do make a very strong case about the election.
I mean, if this gets out, that'll be done.
Did you seriously expect me to show up here, move her body, put it somewhere else, set it on fire, and make it all look like an accident? That's what Dutch would have done.
Look where it got him, Pat, a permanent address at the bottom of Long Island Sound.
- Nick.
- What? This isn't some case of me running down to city hall and fixing a parking ticket.
You do realize that? This is a womars life.
And a mars, and a family's.
It's many things, Nick.
Many.
All right, look.
If I were you, I'd call the police.
Once this situation becomes a legal matter, I hope you'll call me, as your family lawyer, to do my part.
But right now, this isn't a legal situation, it's a moral one.
And as of right now, it's not mine, it's yours.
Good night.
What are we gonna do? Well, there's only one thing we can do.
We must follow Nick's sage advice.
- Hey.
- Hey.
The car's waiting for us downstairs.
You're going dressed like that to the benefit? Oh, yeah.
No, I'm not going.
Okay.
- Wild guess? - I'm tired.
That's it.
That's all.
Karen, you know that it's okay if you don't want to say, "I love you.
" I mean, that's what this is all about, right? - No.
Maybe a little, yeah.
- Okay.
You know, I could have any woman in New York, but I've chosen you because I enjoy being with you, so I said it.
You don't have to say it back.
But, while we're at it and we're being honest, let's just get it all out on the table.
I know why you're seeing me, and I know it's for one reason and one reason only, and that is to gather dirt for Daddy.
- It started out that way, but it's.
- Let's cut to the chase.
Karen, I made my first fortune on a prism, a computer processor that can read information on waves of light.
Now, in six months, I'm gonna roll this out.
- What is that? - A fuel.
Clean-burning.
Non toxic.
This is gonna do for transportation what my prism did for information.
It's gonna change everything.
It's yours.
I want you to take this to your father.
Let him hand it over to his chemists.
They are gonna have fun figuring this out.
And your father will make more money than even he could ever imagine.
I'll lose millions in R&D, but, hey, Daddy's happy, right? Because that's what this is all about, right? Keeping Daddy happy.
Oh, my God.
We really did not need to drink that whole second bottle.
I respectfully disagree.
A high-end buzz becomes you.
Oh, Jeremy.
Jeremy, you saved me from a night full of self-pity.
Thank you.
- But this is where it ends.
- Meaning? Meaning, don't try and kiss me.
I wasrt going to.
- Damn it, Jeremy.
Why do you do that? - Because I think you're beautiful.
Come on, Lise.
You got stood up for a birthday dinner you were trying to throw for someone else.
You're the prettiest girl in New York, and you know you want me to kiss you.
Or you want to kiss me, whichever.
I don't.
I know you are unable to believe me when I say it, but I really don't.
Nick! Nick! Nick! Nick, wait! - Let's go.
- Nick, wait! Wait! Nick! Maybe my family and your family are just a bad combination, you know? - You ever think of that? - It's crossed my mind.
Your mom and my dad, my wife and your brother.
You and me.
I mean, there are people all over the world whose interactions are simple and clean and generally lead to good things happening, right? Yeah, well, here's to them.
- I'm sorry.
- About what? Just the way I talked to you when you showed up here naked.
Oh.
When I said you have choices.
'Cause maybe we don't, really.
You know, maybe Lisa doesn't.
Maybe Jeremy doesn't.
Maybe you don't, and maybe I don't.
- Maybe Patrick doesn't.
- Patrick? I just mean that maybe it's all just chemistry, you know? You know, you just.
You want what you want, and you can't stop wanting it.
Maybe it's that simple.
Yeah, you're drunk.
And you're beautiful.
- And you're thinking about Simon.
- I am.
I can't talk right now, Lisa.
No, I'm sorry, it's nothing.
Everything's fine.
No.
No, it's nothing.
Yeah, I can be there.
I'll see you then.
- Who was that? - That was your father.
- Oh.
- 8:00 tomorrow morning.
I've been summoned.
What? You and I are not a bad combination, Nick.
It's just, it's bad timing.
Hey, Mom.
Where the hell is my son? He and Andrea just left.
I begged her to stay and say goodbye, but she said that they could still catch the flight.
Their visas came through? Yes.
She said she got a phone call from the consulate out of the blue.
Next thing I knew, she was grabbing little Brian, along with the luggage, and, to be honest, a few of our best towels.
- Where's Tripp? - Why? Do you want him to intervene? He already did.
Excellent, Clark.
Well done.
Thank you.
- You wanted to see me? - Yeah.
Please.
Do you know how many men died building the Brooklyn Bridge? - No idea.
- Twenty-seven.
Twenty-seven for a bridge that every day more than a million people go back and forth on.
So, this is your way of saying that Ellen was expendable? No.
No, no, no.
Just that, for every venture, there are costs.
People aren't costs, Tripp.
They're people.
Ellen contrived a life that can be best described as a venal venture, in which, regrettably, she did not have the strength to play her role.
In the end, she resorted to drink, and finally, last night, once again, to violence.
She had none of the patience and grace that make your marriage to Lisa such a blessing.
Yeah, I'm a lucky man.
All I asked you to do was to help protect my son and his innocent children from what would surely have become an immensely destructive misunderstanding.
What do you want from me, Tripp? I want you to allow yourself to become a part of this family.
And I know we're not perfect, we're messy.
But you yourself said that, at the end of the day, we love each other.
Let yourself be a part of that.
You are a son to me.
Let us love you.
Dad, I'm gonna have to bail on Nick's party.
- Hey, Nick.
- Hi, Jeremy.
You.
What? I should go.
Jeremy.
Wait, wait, wait.
There's one thing.
I will be at my office if you need anything else taken care of.
- You ready to talk? - I'm ready to listen.
I was drunk, Nick, and you left me waiting there when I.
Are you seriously defending the idea that you were kissing Jeremy? Are you seriously not willing to forgive me when you've done the same thing with Karen? Oh, so we're even now? Is that the moral of the story at the end of the day? That's what this marriage is? You tell me what this marriage is.
Doesrt it ever occur to you that you are headed down the exact same path your dad went down? Little by little, they're pulling you in.
I'm losing you.
You're losing me? You're kissing Jeremy, and you're losing me? We're losing us.
You know it's true.
I know when you took this job you thought you could walk this razor's edge all the time, between their values and ours, between their family and ours, but someday, Nick, you're gonna have to make a choice.
And when that day comes, I hope you choose us.
You're coming, right? Lise, you're coming to the party? - I'm going for a walk.
- Lisa! It's because I wouldn't do it.
I wouldn't go to Ellen and talk to her and tell her to sack up and play Darling ball, so you disappeared my family.
I had nothing to do with it.
- You're full of crap.
- No, I am not, actually.
If I had known events were unfolding that way with their visa, I would have jumped at the chance to help.
If you had come to me.
That's what family does.
We help each other.
Well, I'm sorry I didn't talk to Ellen.
If you had taken the time to let her air her troubled mind, things might have gone differently.
What are you talking about? It would be a great help to your brother Patrick and to me, too, if you could agree that you spent the past two days sailing with him out at the Hamptons.
Why? Will you do it or not? Sure.
Why the hell not? And spend 10 minutes in the tanning bed, before we go to Nick's party.
Well, you look a trifle pale.
Well, look who's here.
Arert you going to Nick's party? I'm running late.
He'll live.
So? What'd your daddy think of my little concoction? I didn't give it to him, and I'm not going to.
- You sure about this? - Yeah.
Look, my whole life, there's only been one man who ever moved me.
You know, who made me feel like I was actually living.
- Nick.
- Yeah.
But something's happening to me, Simon, with you.
I don't know what it is.
You know, maybe I'm growing up.
Maybe.
Maybe you're just amazing.
I just.
I know that I don't want to let you go.
What you do to me, it scares me a little, you know? But I like it.
I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go to the shindig.
Hey.
- Come after.
- I will.
Yeah, it's me.
We've got her.
Let me guess.
- It's a long story.
- Make it short.
I'm a mistake.
Ouch.
- I'm always the mistake.
- Always? So, since you're such a master of mistakes, is it a mistake you came back here? Probably.
Is it a mistake letting me stand next to you? It's kind of hard to say, I guess.
Would it be a mistake to take me to that limo you've got parked outside, and.
Only one way to find out.
- This is definitely not a mistake.
- Yeah.
I'm standing in front of Valhalla, the legendary rural compound of America's first family, the Darlings.
Mr.
Clark! Mr.
Clark! Look.
Valued at over $30 million, the property, which was once the home of legendary gangster Bugsy Siegel The country house.
is completely destroyed.
- Should we call Mr.
Darling? - No.
Let's not ruin the party.
The red-carpet event was thought to be a fundraiser for Patrick Darling's Senate campaign, but it turns out, it's just a birthday party for their family lawyer, Nick George.
And that's your weather and traffic.
Mr.
George, how were you able to broker this historic reconciliation between father and son? Well, it was quite an adventure.
Here's the birthday boy.
Letitia Darling, you look beautiful.
How are you? - Happy birthday, Nick.
- Thanks.
Have you seen my wife? - Lisa's not with you? - No.
No.
If you'll excuse me.
Patrick, where's that wife of yours? I'm sure she's just running a few moments late.
No, Brian left the ministry.
Got a little too much sun, huh? Yeah, Paddy and I went sailing yesterday, off our place in the Hamptons.
Hey, Nick.
I want you to meet an old friend of mine.
Hal Matheson, Nick George.
- Nice to meet you.
- Your dad was a hell of a guy.
He'd be so proud if he were still with us.
Thank you.
Chippir around Kick my brains around the floor These are the days it never rains but it pours - You got something for me? - Yes, Daddy.
A kiss and this.
And loves dares you to change our way of Caring about ourselves Hey.
- You made it.
- I did.
So, are we okay? We're okay.
Can the birthday boy come up here, please? Never before.
Well, maybe once before, and I'm thinking of Nick's dad, Dutch, has one man done so much to hold a family together.
Happy birthday.
- What's this? - That is the key to that.
That boat.
Thank you.
- What's going on? - I don't know.
N YPD.
Prepare to be boarded.
- What's happening, Nick? - I have no idea.
What did you do, Nick? What the hell did you do? Nobody move.
Prepare to be boarded.
Stand back, please.
You ratted me out? - What did you do, Nick? - I didn't do anything.
Stay back, please.
Sorry to have to do this, Mr.
Attorney General.
I got my orders.
Detective Larrabee, what seems to be the problem? Murder, Nick, in the first degree.
Here's an arrest warrant.
Letitia Darling, you're under arrest for the murder of Dutch George.
What? This is outrageous.
You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
- Patrick! - Nick! You have the right to have an attorney present.
Help.
Nick, help.
If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you.
Tripp, are you there? Mrs.
Darling, do you understand these rights as I've spoken them to you? Nick, help!