Dudes (2023) s02e01 Episode Script

1
LAST SEASON
Hey, Sofi, what ended up
happening with that guy, Alejo?
Which one's that one? The one who decided
to ghost you outta nowhere?
Yeah, him, but I don't really care.
Because now the one who ghosts them is me.
Girl, it feels like men
just never grow up, right?
Adolescence sticks with them
forever, right?
What should I call you now? Ricaprio.
How's it going with your son?
He won't drop
that fucking cell phone for a second.
Well, but there's some
that are the exception.
For example, Simón. He's great.
He said, "I'll take care of my house,
I'll take care of my baby
so that my wife can go back to work."
But it would have to be remote working,
like during the pandemic.
I wish more men were as committed
as you are to your children.
I mean,
dudes like that are really amazing.
But honestly, they're one in ten million.
Oh, but as for the rest,
all dudes are the same.
They only think about one thing.
Have you considered
that you're addicted to sex?
And we also think about sex,
but you know, in a more balanced way.
The thing is
they don't get better with age.
I mean, just look at my dad.
If you don't do what I'm asking of you,
I'm gonna bring everything to light.
He acts like he's still living in the 90s.
Totally, he swears
he can do whatever he wants
and that there's no consequences.
It's best that we put an end
to the contract.
And now it's my turn
to take the reins of Miranda Holdings
because my father
decided to stay in Sao Paulo,
he didn't want to face his critics.
In fact, he even got a girlfriend.
You'll be getting the divorce papers
from my lawyer.
And my mother,
getting divorced after so many years
living in my dad's shadow.
A huge decision, right?
Although I'm really happy for her.
-You look prettier in person.
-Thank you.
Could it be that dudes
are a necessary evil?
Sometimes I wanna retire,
like I wanna be done,
like become a heterosexual,
but it goes away.
The same thing happens to me, you know?
I mean, it's Andrew, then it's Julián.
Then it's none of them.
But I mean, Julián,
with that great smile he has.
Hey, my dad got out of hand
with the two of them, didn't he?
He's so damn controlling!
If you begin
a personal relationship with Antonia,
you can start forgetting
about my investment, is that clear?
I swear that I really thought
Juli and I had a future
and that's why I acted
like a total crazy person, but well
You know, I like you,
I adore you, but I
He put the break on once again.
I want us to build something nice,
but calmly, okay?
How annoying. He's so damn indecisive.
It's just that all dudes are the same,
aren't they, Dad?
Oh, my God,
this feels so good, I feel so light,
getting all that hair off me,
I feel liberated.
Seriously, it resets my hard drive.
It's time, girlfriend,
let's start all over.
Thank you, Jean Paul.
Thank you.
Hold on, I'll grab your suitcase.
Are you sure
you're not gonna come upstairs?
No.
Are you not sure or are you not coming up?
I'm not coming up.
Okay.
Well then
-Bye.
-Bye.
Alright, uh. Bye.
Wait. Wait a second.
Wait just a second.
JULY: HEY, I'M IN THE CAR,
I THINK I'LL BE THERE IN 10-15 MAX
We have to hurry up. Juli's headed over.
I've been ready for a while.
Whenever you say.
It's Julián.
Hey, how are you?
Good and you, how are you?
Good. I made it.
I have to tell you everything,
a little tired, but it was still worth it.
Oh, that's good.
Is everything fine?
Yeah, awesome.
I'm happy you're back safely.
Yeah, yeah, I want to see you.
Hey, wanna have dinner tomorrow?
No, I can't.
What about an early morning coffee?
Impossible, I have a meeting
first thing in the morning.
But, uh, on Tuesday I may have
a little time slot, would that work?
That's my little time slot! Save it!
Save it for me
because I seriously want to see you.
I want to give you a hug
and tell you everything,
you can't imagine.
Okay. Bye.
Bye.
Dani
No one can find out.
And what's the big deal?
We're seeing each other.
No.
We're just hooking up.
If we don't say anything,
no one annoys us, no one finds out,
and everything stays the same.
You look hotter when your mouth is shut.
You come out first.
DUDES
"HONESTY AND SELFISHNESS"
Mafe?
Hey there.
-Hey there.
-Hey there.
Did you hook up in the men's bathroom
or something?
Oh, right!
-Gimme a cold one, please.
-Okay, gotcha.
That's nuts, they're mixed now.
You're kidding.
No, don't tell me this place
is on all that gender bullshit too.
-Hey, that's good.
-No, no, what good?
Let's see, okay,
I'm gonna tell you something,
here's a really easy question,
has any of you guys
talked to Pretty Boy this week at all?
-No.
-Oh, he probably doesn't have time
because he's enjoying himself
with the Brazilians.
No, I'm sure Lina's taken all his energy.
No, I don't think so,
that dude's really into Antonia.
Come on, he's traveling,
he's alone, he's in Brazil.
He'd be dumb if he doesn't get
a piece of that ass.
Whether it's Lina or a Brazilian,
I hope he found a solution,
because I'm telling you,
while that dude's been in Brazil
enjoying himself and drinking caipirinha
I did an in-depth review of the finances
with the accounting team.
But in depth, in depth like
with the tax auditor?
-Obviously.
-Has anyone told you
you look more handsome
with your mouth shut, baby boy?
-Fine, fine, fine.
-I bet he's heard it.
Hey, Santi, so what?
Is it really bad?
-What's up?
-Really, really bad.
Hey, man! Juli!
Check him out.
No, it's already started,
it's already started.
-How did it go?
-Great, great.
-How'd it go?
-Great, great.
-What's up?
-Good?
You were kinda lost all week, right?
What do you mean I was lost, dude?
I've checked in on the company.
Okay, let's get to the point here,
did you get the capital?
Hey, hey, hey,
don't try to run from this, man.
-Hey, may I have a beer, please.
-No, no, no, no, no,
drop the mystery. Why'd you call us here?
Where are Simón and Tomás?
Well, Simón said he can't,
he's home with the babies.
Tomás, no idea,
call him to see where he's at.
You got a message from the Dudes group.
DUDES GROUP: WHERE ARE YOU?
WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU
TO TELL YOU ABOUT BRAZIL
HURRY, COME TO THE BAR,
THESE GUYS ARE EAGER
Great!
I bet they're gonna give you good news.
No, I don't care.
I'd rather stay here cuddling with you.
Plus, I'm gonna have the whole week
with the guys to talk about that.
You have to go.
Besides, I have to go home already,
I wanna finish a book that's really good.
Hey, why do we always
have to meet in hotels?
I ask because I feel
like the lover you hide.
That's not it.
Don't you think it's more fun
to be like this without pressure,
without any labels?
Not really.
But whatever you want.
Well, then at least let's make a toast
while we wait for that nerd, right?
-Alright.
-Okay, everyone,
everyone, everyone, everyone.
No, no, no, no, no, no hold on,
let's do it the right way.
Hey.
-Can we have a round of mezcal, please?
-Seriously?
As we should, as we should.
On a Sunday?
You're really something, dudes.
-So?
-So what? We're still afloat?
What's up?
Richie, my brother.
-How'd it go?
-Mrs. Mafe.
-Good.
-Tenderness arrived.
Mr. Daniel.
Wow, Santi, so elegant.
Yeah? You think so?
Hey, man, ancestral hug, brother.
Very good, very good, very good.
That's it.
-Ready?
-To Billuka.
To Brazil. Cheers.
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
Hey, guys.
I have something important to tell you.
This is serious.
That's a lot of money, man.
-Lots of cash, brother!
-Let's go!
-Good!
-Listen, Juli,
and, and what about the Brazilians?
Do you think we can trust
those guys or what?
Yeah, well, at least it seems that way,
I asked around about them.
People say they're pretty trustworthy.
They have a similar business to us
and they're killing it right now.
But, guys, I organized a meeting
with them via video call
-to see if we go on with this or not.
-Awesome.
It's great that we do a video call
so we can discuss
several important points
with the Brazilians.
And I think
the most important thing to talk about is,
how'd things go with Lina?
What are you talking about?
No, fine, fine.
She, well, she's very professional.
-She was there helping me and all that.
-Okay.
-So, you banged her.
-Bro, come on,
how could I bang her
if I was there working?
Yes, I knew it!
Pay up, brother, pay up.
You see? Julián is a guy with principles.
He doesn't bang appliances like you do.
You too. Don't play dumb.
Fine, fine, fine, here you have.
I don't have any more.
Did you fuckers seriously bet on this?
-Duh!
-Duh!
Well, I wasn't there,
but I would have won.
Alright, guys, this is
a very important moment for Billuka,
-let's make a toast.
-Great!
Cheers!
-That's right, cheers! Cheers! Cheers!
-Cheers! Cheers! Cheers!
A MOVIE FROM JACOBO PAZ
Don't eat it all now,
the movie hasn't even started.
No.
Can you explain this shit to me?
What's this shitty movie even about?
It's like three hours long,
are we gonna be stuck here
for three hours?
-Who recommended this to you?
-3 hours and 45 minutes.
-No!
-Everyone is talking about this movie.
How come?
Because it's Colombian.
It's been nominated everywhere.
No, no, no, no,
who even made this, what is this?
-Why's it so famous?
-'Cause it's a Jacobo Paz movie.
Well, I have no idea who that dude is.
I hope he's at least good looking enough
if I have to sit here
and watch this all night.
Let's see.
Mmhmm.
I can tell you that this movie
has won a shit ton of awards.
I bet they have!
-What? What did you say?
-Yes, yes, yes.
I slept with Lina,
I did it cuz I'm an idiot.
You can't tell anyone about this.
-Please.
-No, of course.
So, wait, are you not sure
about Antonia anymore or something?
Yes, of course, I am. Yes.
The thing is, is you know,
Brazil, the contract,
those damn fuckin Brazilian caipirinhas
that are so strong.
She got me drunk.
-Yes, yes.
-No, she really got me drunk!
Delicious. He's so hot.
-I'd do him, without a doubt.
-Let's see.
Sure you would, Antonia,
you'd be incapable
of banging that disgusting filthy hippie,
with his dirty little hair.
Baby, having pig once a year doesn't hurt.
-Yeah, sure.
-And he's superhot.
Why don't we watch a movie
that has more like, like violence,
-and action, and sex?
-You had a hetero moment.
Hey, speaking of sex.
You must be a bit sex starved
after you gave Juli that "time apart"
so that he could have his path to success.
-Stop it with the popcorn already!
-Stop! I'm serious! Marcel, stop.
Okay, fine, fine, fine, calm down.
Do you think she knows something?
No, I mean,
but she might be like this with you
because you told her
you wanted some time, what do I know?
She doesn't know Lina, right?
What's with all the secrets, guys?
The secret committee. What?
Did you already tell her
that you finally got a nice piece of Lina?
No, obviously not.
Juli was just telling me that, nothing,
that Antonia's being weird with him.
And Mr. Miranda was in Brazil,
so well, you know,
-he thinks that
-Obviously, as long
as his daughter doesn't get involved
with a loser, he'll do what it takes.
Oh, I can't make jokes anymore?
You're sensitive.
Well, either way,
you didn't do anything wrong, right?
Let's go dance,
let's go dance, let's go dance!
-Let's go dance.
-Okay, I'll be there, I'll be right there.
Come, come, come, come, come, come.
Let's see, wait.
Oh, see? See?
Everything is as agreed with Julián,
giving priority to the expansion plan.
The truth is
that your numbers are very good,
and we're all very excited
to do everything possible
to help you grow and finish conquering
the Colombian market.
For us everything is perfect as hell!
-"Perfect as hell."
-"As hell."
Alright. You guys talk to your lawyers
and whenever you're ready
let us know and we can sign.
Sounds good, but, um, Gus, Tomaso,
thank you very much, I have a question.
Here in the share structure section,
does it say that your shares
are class A shares?
There must be a mistake, right?
Because you're gonna respect
that our shares are class A, not yours.
Yes, as we agreed,
and everyone retains their participation.
Julián, your shares
would now be worth more than triple.
That's because
of our influence in Billuka.
Yes, no, no, no, no,
but your shares have to be class B, guys,
preferred, but class B.
We can't have the same level of voting.
Hold on, Julián, I don't know
how there was a misunderstanding.
We agreed that your shares
would be Class A,
but we never said
that our shares would be Class B.
I mean, after all,
you're still keeping the larger shares.
Okay, perfect,
that's perfect for us, folks,
we're gonna go over it with our lawyers
and we'll be in touch soon.
-Sounds good.
-Okay.
We'll be waiting to hear from you.
It was a pleasure to meet all of you guys
and we're very excited
about the potential we see in Billuka.
Let's do this. Talk soon, guys.
Bye, you guys take care.
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
-Bye.
-See you later.
That wasn't the deal, dude.
That wasn't the deal.
What the fuck just happened here?
Now that I'm at the helm
of Miranda Holdings,
I've concluded that there's a number
of changes we could make
that would be beneficial
to the image of the company.
The first and most important thing
that I see as really necessary
Our image problems
are not serious, Antonia.
That's why nothing has been done about it?
Miguel, my dad's romance
and subsequent scandal with that woman
didn't go unnoticed.
We've been here
a much longer time than you,
and we know what works here
and what doesn't.
We don't need any changes.
May I continue, Miguel?
It has been proven
that when financial aid is provided
to a woman in a state of financial need,
they are many times
more likely to reinvest.
They tend to make money grow,
they create capital.
It's much safer for a company to invest
in women who have people helping them out.
However, they're the most forgotten
by the financial system.
I see a great opportunity here.
No, brother.
Dude, I don't know when it all came down
to me having to look for money
and having to work with dishonest people.
Listen
I wanna be honest with you, brother.
Because if I'm not,
it's not gonna end well.
When I left Ciclas, I
I didn't come out so well.
I mean, they messed with me,
somehow the situation
got all confused, and I had to sell.
But the company put me in a bad spot,
I had the NDA so I couldn't say anything,
and I made up the whole thing
about being focused on startups
and all these other companies,
but, dude, it was all bullshit.
Why didn't you tell me anything?
I mean, how am I gonna tell my new partner
they screwed me cuz I was an idiot?
If we at Miranda Holdings
become that hand that so many women need,
we will be the first ones to cover an area
that's experiencing exponential growth.
Women that have financial struggles.
No, no, Antonia, no, listen.
We're not in the charity business here.
Is helping women out
charity to you, Miguel?
No, of course not,
but you can't seriously expect us
to do something we're not interested in
just because now you're sitting
in your father's chair.
Antonia, I already know
where this is going,
and we really have more important things
to focus on right now.
You know what? I agree,
for example, stop dismissing
a woman's complaint,
for example, you could start there.
That was a tantrum
that's already being mitigated
by the Public Relations department.
"A tantrum", "Charity".
Wow, we're in trouble if this company
keeps thinking this way.
And I'll give you some news,
because you guys haven't heard,
but the world has changed.
You guys aren't gonna be able
to continue controlling everything
from a Turkish bath, drinking whiskey!
All my savings, man,
everything, everything,
my whole life, man,
I put into Billuka, do you get me?
And now we're about to go bankrupt, dude.
We have to accept that shit
no matter what.
We have to accept
because we'll lose our asses.
I don't want to stress you out,
I don't want to worry you, dude,
not at all, but
But giving the shares to these guys,
that makes us very vulnerable, brother.
Listen, please don't tell the guys
what I'm telling you, dude, please.
But if we don't make a good decision,
we'll go bankrupt, Daniel,
for real, we'll go bankrupt.
Hey, I have to tell you something too.
Everything cool here, kiddos?
Later, it's nothing important.
Julián, one thing, man.
Well, I know that the decision is yours
at the end of the day, right?
But it's also my duty
to give you my opinion on everything.
Did you see the report yet?
You have to have faith, dude.
Okay.
Just have faith.
This is yummy.
I just finished that series
about the crazy guy
who leaves his dog a fortune
after he passes away.
What else should I watch?
I know! I've got one for you.
There's this sick movie,
it's amazing, by Jacobo Paz.
It's called "Dry Tears",
you simply have to watch it.
I've heard of it.
I'm gonna tell Juli to watch it with me,
I heard it's beautiful.
But I think it's safe.
-You think?
-Yes, yes, yes.
And why are you so happy,
like hungry, all cheery?
I'm always happy, what do you mean?
-Yeah? I dunno, I noticed
-Well, what do we do?
-What? Coffee? Some coffee?
-Coffee.
-I'm not gonna tell you.
-Hold on, Mafe, you have to tell me.
-Who is it?
-Let's see, alright,
-what should I order?
-Stop it!
Hey! Please, girl.
Thank you.
-No!
-You scared me.
Let's see this over here.
I can't believe this.
Marcel.
Just a second.
Hi, hello.
Marcel.
It's delicious.
-Awesome, right?
-Delicious.
-Delicious?
-Can I sit down?
-Sure, go for it.
-You leaving already?
You scared me!
Hey, I'm gonna tell you something.
Who the hell do you think you are
to launch yourself onto me
and give me that disgusting kiss?
As far as I know, you loved it, though.
Watch what you say.
If I remember correctly,
the one who launched himself
at me was you.
I do remember, yes.
You know something, Santi?
A closeted gay is tacky these days, okay?
Denial's not the style.
I have a really good therapist
that can help,
because that generates trauma
and frustration
and a lot of other things,
yeah, seriously, wounds.
Don't touch me.
-Why are you out of the office?
-No, just some coffee.
-I'm leaving, we have a meeting in
-We have a meeting now, right?
Yes.
Oops, my bad, I was eating yours
-I'm coming.
-I'm coming.
Excuse me. A pleasure.
Yeah.
-Bye.
-Bye.
This guy ate my entire dessert.
-I'm not gonna tell you, forget it.
-I want to know now.
"The adoption of sustainable practices
are: One, food security,
two, water pollution
and scarcity of water resources,
-of course the lack of"
-Dad, stop.
If you read the whole study,
we're never gonna finish.
I'll go get my laptop,
I have ConvoPT on there
and I'll be done
in less than half an hour.
No, I don't think so, baby boy,
if you think you're gonna do
your school essay using that PT thing
and I'm gonna allow it,
you're very mistaken,
why did you leave it all
to the last minute?
Let's see, write this down,
"Water pollution is"
What's your problem?
My mom lets me use
artificial intelligence.
Everything's so complicated with you.
I mean, I know that back in the stone age
you had to go into libraries
to search encyclopedias and everything,
but I mean, times change, okay?
And those who don't adjust
-are left behind.
-Okay, yes, I know that,
but it's a very different thing
to use the Internet for research
and to formulate
your own concept, right? Your opinion.
That's what an essay is about.
And another thing
is having a robot do it for you.
A robot?
Are you serious?
That's really offensive.
Listen, boomer,
just because you have no idea what AI is,
and much less how to use it,
doesn't mean that I have to do my homework
the way that you did it
back with the dinosaurs!
RICARDO CALLING
-You okay?
-Okay, yes.
Yes, don't worry,
no, it's actually really silly.
So, tell me.
Do you know anything
about artificial intelligence?
Don't tell me you banged Lina
in the middle of the conference
and Mr. Miranda saw you.
No.
Okay. That was at the hotel. Hm?
Besides, it was late
and I came way too fast.
No, Mafe, no, no. No, it was only once.
What if Mr. Miranda
saw you guys entering the room?
Don't even say that.
-No, no, no.
-Juli.
No, it's impossible,
because he was in another hotel.
What do I do now?
Is guilt eating you away?
What should I do?
Well, she's probably doing fine,
and is super excited to see you
and you're here
with this emotional dyslexia, man.
Put yourself in my shoes.
Imagine if this woman
is the love of my life,
or I don't know, my soul mate,
and for the relationship
to start with a lie like that? No!
-No, that won't hold up, no.
-So cute.
Juli, my opinion.
If you tell her about it now,
it won't help with absolutely anything.
You're not dating,
she hasn't even asked you.
Omitting is not the same as lying.
Fucking hell!
This thing is incredible, isn't it?
Yeah.
Spooky, huh?
I mean, it is very useful,
it's not like it's gonna
Yeah, totally.
But we have to keep an eye
on this young man,
because he'll have the application
write everything for him.
Listen, I see it more
as a source of, of research,
or something to help if you're confused,
but never, never
as a source of creativity,
and much less for it to do things for me.
Right, young man?
-Yes.
-Yes.
Oops.
I bet it's the school bus
dropping off a girlfriend.
Which one? Luisa, Camila, Tatiana?
-Lucas!
-What? Seriously,
he's messing around
with really young girls.
I'm even afraid
to introduce him to my girlfriend.
I mean, Mom,
don't be surprised if he gets arrested.
-Sir, good evening.
-Good evening.
-Your order.
-Thank you.
Can I take a photo?
-Of me?
-Of the order.
Yeah.
-Thank you.
-Okay, thank you.
See you around.
-Your dad's gonna be upset.
-Let him be upset.
Lucas.
-Hey!
-I have food, guys.
-Huh?
-Arabic?
So you see I haven't forgotten.
I ordered for both of us.
Well, for everyone, if you want.
What a treat.
Could you bring us plates, please?
Yes, Lucas, do it. Listen to your dad.
Your Dad.
-Dani!
-What?
You know you have to shop
for food, don't you?
I hate doing that.
Let's just grab pizza next door.
There is a new place,
owned by an Italian, it's yummy.
-I recommend it.
-Yummy!
-Yeah?
-Sure, let's have it delivered!
Oh, no.
No, it always gets here cold.
Dani, we can warm it up.
Come on, I don't feel like going out,
how annoying.
-I'm so comfortable here.
-Really?
Stop being lazy, it's super close,
it's not like it's 20 blocks away.
We'll take the car,
we'll be there in a minute.
No, I know, I know,
"What happens if we run into someone."
Well, we tell him that we're just working
and that's it, end of the fucking dilemma.
What's going on?
Let's see.
Half pepperoni, half Hawaiian.
Seriously? You can't really like Hawaiian.
-Yummy!
-Yummy?
Don't worry, don't worry,
I got it, don't worry.
-Oh, God, but don't get the Hawaiian one.
-Got it, I won't get it.
Lucas, what about you?
No, I definitely can't eat any of that.
I'm highly allergic to discounted food.
Lucas!
I'm going to bed.
Bye, sleep well.
Text me as soon as you get home, okay?
Okay.
Lucas, your teeth.
Yes, they're right here.
Wow. Why do I have to text
when I get home, huh?
-The nerve.
-The nerve.
Wow, what's up with this playlist?
No, wait a second.
Wait, why? No, no, leave it on, I love it.
Reminds me of the good times, come on!
Or don't tell me
now you only listen to reggaeton.
I mean, because of the young girls
you go out with.
No, I like reggaeton a little,
but do you know what I can't stand?
Techno, that crap is horrible, right?
Hi there.
Wow.
Hello.
Wow, you look, you look beautiful.
Thank you.
A lot of traffic?
No, not too much.
How are things?
How's it going at the company?
Good. Good, awesome,
I mean the board members
are all jerks, but still normal.
Of course, they must be feeling
destabilized by you, right?
Well, anything that's got less
than 40 years old
gathering dust
in that office destabilizes them.
So heads are gonna roll, I guess.
Sao Paulo's incredible, you can't imagine.
Great, so great, I had a great time there,
I got to see a lot,
I made some contacts, I socialized.
Good things are coming for Billuka, yep.
Have you ever been there?
Right.
My dad told me
that the summit was really good.
I don't know if you ran into him there
a couple of times,
-maybe
-Yes.
Yes, yes, yes, I obviously saw him there
a couple of times,
but I was doing my thing.
I was making my contacts
and talking business.
-Yes, you know
-Stop.
Julián, stop.
Stop. I mean it.
I think we're too old
to be doing this right now.
I was at the hotel the day you left.
I was there with my dad,
and I saw you with a woman.
You were super affectionate with her,
I guess, to put it mildly.
And my dad also told me
that he saw you there with her
-several times.
-Of course, yes, of course.
But you never mentioned her
in any of our calls.
You didn't tell me anything.
-That kinda makes me think something.
-No.
-Um.
-What'd you think?
That I was really gonna miss out
on a romantic trip
with the guy I always wanted in college?
Relax. What happens in Brazil,
stays in Brazil.
It's, uh, Lina, it's Lina,
she's a classmate
from back in college,
and she was working as a liaison,
introducing me to contacts,
and investors and moving around a lot.
But absolutely nothing happened with her.
Hey
What I told you was for real,
I'm serious about you.
And I thought about you the whole time.
I thought about you too.
For real?
It happened, it happened once.
Okay, I was really drunk,
Antonia, I was far gone
-Ugh, I don't want to know. I don't care.
-No, no, yes.
Listen to me, look.
The best thing, the good part
about this whole situation,
about what happened with her there,
is that I realized
that I wanted to be with you.
Excuse me, Julián?
You're telling me
you had to screw another woman
to realize that you wanted to be with me?
You're seriously telling me this?
I don't understand.
I don't understand the logic.
No, of course, I understand, obviously,
that's what men do
just before getting hitched, right?
The last little bit of fun.
No, it wasn't fun,
no, alright, Antonia, listen to me.
Stop! And that's why you gave me
that whole speech
about how you wanted us
to take things slowly
so you could go over there
free and without ties.
-You wanted to go screw her?
-No, no, no.
-Why don't you tell me?
-I feel like an asshole!
I feel bad,
and I've been thinking,
"Should I tell her? Should I not tell her?
Tell her, tell her! Be honest with her."
And it's not the best way
to start things off, I know. I know that.
No, really, Julián, what a disappointment.
No, hold on, wait.
I was imagining this
as something else, I don't know.
-Whatever.
-Yes, I know,
but I'm telling you the truth,
I'm not telling you lies, Antonia.
What do you want me to do
with this information, Julián?
-You want me to clap?
-No.
Should I thank you? What do I do?
Congratulate you?
Well, thank you very much.
No, Antonia, come, we're not gonna start
-fighting over something like this.
-There's no "we"!
DUDES