GameFace (2017) s02e01 Episode Script
Series 2, Episode 1
Tell me a little bit about yourself.
I'm an actress.
Do you have a partner? I was with Simon for 12 years.
Two weeks after we broke up he got married.
Tania, this is Marcella.
It's just he married the first mess he met after me.
What is going well? I like John, my driving instructor.
John? I'm going to keep the knickers on for a bit, if that's OK with you.
I really enjoy your company.
How about, you know, we do something? I can show you my bowling alley? You ever taken drugs? My brother Billy has a proper drugs problem so I leave the drugs to him.
And have you ever done something you regretted? Did you shag John? Shhh.
Simon.
We have a lot of work to do.
A flower does not compete with the flower next to it, it just blooms.
As you begin to expand the vision you have of yourself, rid your mind of distractions and petty comparisons.
This is the beginning towards self-mastery.
Do this and you will see that loving vision of yourself reflected back in all areas of your life.
Live your life full of hope, free of fear.
Human beings have unlimited potential You can transform yourself wherever you are right now.
Today is the only day you will ever have.
Be grateful, be brave and be excellent.
Marcella, showtime.
For subtitling services, contatct: The plague lasted from 1665 to 1666.
Pain and misery stalked the streets.
I lost all of my teeth in 20 minutes.
It won't be long for me now.
Oh.
Oh You can almost smell her, can't ya? Oh! Oh The plague lasted from 1665 to 16 The plague lasted from 1665 to 1666 all of the Fast walkers here.
The plague lasted OK.
And don't forget to breathe.
God, don't forget to breathe.
You always say that, don't forget to breathe.
Who forgets to breathe? It's a ridiculous thing to say.
Don't forget Sorry, I'm just really nervous, I need to pass.
It's fine.
I've a good feeling about today.
Yeah, I think we'll be all done with this today.
You sound like you're getting sick of it Me.
No No, I Just, you know, pass, you know.
Marcella Donahue.
Ah, hi, Jane.
One of yours? Hopefully, not for much longer.
Oh, hey.
Party time.
Hey.
Bloody hell You don't half look like my Auntie Karen.
Oh Your Auntie Karen.
Oh, I eh.
.
I hope she's a good driver.
No, unfortunately not.
She's a racist old cunt who watches David Icke videos all day.
I mean, I'm not Start the engine.
Well.
That sigh tells me things didn't go our way? Thought you'd gone.
That examiner, I mean, that whole test It's OK Don't worry, you know, you'll get it next time.
Oh, no I You can put up with me and my lessons for a little bit longer, can't you? Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey.
Yeah, so I You know, I was pretty sure that you were going to pass today.
Yeah Me too.
It's just Yeah, no, so I You know, I booked dinner for us this evening, you know, to, eh .
.
to celebrate.
Oh, that's such a shame.
That would've been .
.
that would've been so nice.
Yeah, so um Maybe we should still go.
Yes.
Yeah? We should definitely still go.
That sounds ideal.
Do you mind not touching yourself up in a communal area, Marcella? I was doing .
.
my No.
No.
.
.
excited No.
.
.
dance.
Thank you.
I don't mean to piss on your tits but Someone's following you.
What? Who, a killer? No, no, not You need to stop listening to them fucking murder podcasts.
Killer My guess is it's the DSS.
I'm not on the dole, Linda.
Oh, come off it, Marcella.
All actors are on the dole.
Except Anthony Hopkins.
Are you Anthony Hopkins, Marcella? I work, you know I work.
You've see me leaving dressed as a bear.
Do you think I dress as a bear to get dick? Oh, well See for yourself.
This is stupid.
You're bringing a lot of heat around here.
Well, it seems like the DSS have just driven off so I cannot offer you my loyalty in this situation.
If they aks me, I have to tell them everything I know.
Well Since you open and read literally every piece of mail I get, you're going to have a lot to tell them.
You filthy rat! You filthy, stinking, Tory rat! Oh, you're so hot.
Shut up, rat! What? Filthy, Tory rat God, no, wait.
Did she see you? Don't say it to her, she'll be so embarrassed, OK? How can I not say it to her? Don't say it to her? You don't know what I've seen.
I say everything to her.
Yeah, that's because you're a massive co-dependent with no boundaries.
I'm not co-dependent, I'm old-fashioned needy.
Stop pathologising my wonderful personality, she's into rats, mate.
Rat banging.
OK Why don't you see it as a test? Respect her boundaries, don't say anything to her, just .
.
let it be.
OK, I'll let it be.
Won't ask her about the rat stuff.
Good luck.
Won't find out about the rats.
I don't care about the rats.
I'm so sorry.
I thought you were going to your mum's.
We got carried away.
Yes So So How did it go? The test? Oh, my God.
Yeah, I passed my test.
What? I passed my test.
That is great.
Third time lucky.
Yeah.
What's wrong? So I tiny I let John think that I failed, so that I could carry on with the lessons.
What? You're an .
.
absolute psychopath.
I know, I just, I panicked, I thought he didn't want to see me any more and Co-dependent as fuck, mate.
OK, but listen.
It's all fine cos I'm seeing him tonight and if you confess a lie within 24 hours, it sort of comes under the remit of a prank, right? You know, like, "Oh, I was joking, earlier on when I said I failed, "but really I passed.
" Like a prank.
Erm, yeah, Prankie Boyle.
It's Prankie.
Prankie goes to Hollywood.
Have you met my old mate, Pranco? Get off me, you, get .
.
rat fucker.
No boundaries.
I knew you heard.
Mark, she heard.
Well, you held out for longer than I thought you would.
Congrats on the test.
I hear you're into pranks now.
Marcella Good to see you.
How have you been? I mean, really great.
I just passed my Oh.
Do you mind, actually? Cos, erm, I have agreed for a student to sit in on the sessions.
So, do you actually mind waiting until Frances gets here? Cos I don't want to waste the good stuff.
The good stuff? I'm actually doing OK if you must know so I don't know if it's a good idea Do you mind if we just wait? Can I ask how you've been? Yeah, very good, thank you.
I bought some Yayzees.
Yayzees? Kanye West designs them? Yeezys.
I don't like them.
Hello.
Oh Frances, wonderful, you're here.
Hello, hi, I'm Frances Owen.
Hello.
I really appreciate you letting me sit in on your sessions.
It's going to be most useful for my research.
I've actually been reading some of Graham's case notes.
Some really harrowing stuff.
Harrowing? Wouldn't say harrowing.
No, no.
And it's that keep-going spirit that I'm deeply interested in.
I mean, how does someone sustain that spirit when time after time life just lets her down? How old are you? I'm 19.
Right.
So Shall we shall we begin then? Great.
This is going to be fun.
Marcella .
.
how have things been? Really, really good.
I just I just passed my driving test today.
Very good.
Good.
What? What are you not saying? Lying to someone to stay in contact with them because you're romantically interested in them.
That's not very healthy.
It was more of an omission, it's fine, I'm going to sort it.
It's a big deal, Marcella.
Have you lied before to manipulate men into liking you, or spending time with you? No, no.
Once.
That was such a great story.
The bit where you lost your tickets and then found them again, was my favourite bit.
Yeah, it's wild, right? Checked that pocket twice but no So crazy.
Hey What kind of girls are you into? Oh, you know, kind of punky, tattoo, piercing kind of thing? Me too.
What, you like punky girls? No.
I don't no.
But I like ink.
And I'm covered in tattoos.
Where? Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, I need to I need to go to the bathroom.
Is that a tattoo of a horse wearing boots? Yeah.
That was so cool.
Yeah, it was really good fun oh! See ya.
All right.
So, you don't find yourself lovable as you are? Pretending to be someone or something else in order to .
.
LURE men into bed.
I don't LURE men into bed.
I'm not Rose West for Christ's sake.
I lied about a tattoo once.
And to be fair I was pretty resourceful.
I only had a blue bingo marker so And what about your ex .
.
Simon? Did you lie to him? I was just coming to that, Frances.
OK.
Good.
Yes.
Er Well I guess I pretended I didn't want kids.
So, yeah, next question.
What do you lie about the most? I was just I'm on my way.
I'm on my way.
I'm on my way.
But when you text me, you're on your way, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mum, I forgot my keys.
What the fuck? Come in? Oh, thank you for inviting me into my mother's house while you're naked.
I mean, you know, it just made sense, really.
It's only a couple of days and then Billy said that I could just move in with him and Skinny Pete.
OK, wait, I'm sorry, I'm confused.
How is? Are you and Tania splitting up properly, then? Well, I mean, it's all up in the air at the minute.
You know, we're just having a bit of space, get our heads together.
Simon, it's not cos of what happened with us, is it? No, no, it's not I mean, listen, realising that I still have, HAD, feelings for you is not It wasn't ideal.
But I think Mum dying just made me snap out of everything.
Losing someone you love so much so suddenly just sort of blows your heart apart, you know.
Not all feelings survive that sort of explosion.
After we split up, I just ran straight into another relationship, so to not feel Did you? I didn't notice.
Oh, yeah, I did.
Two weeks.
You got married after two weeks.
Madness and I When Mum died, it's not like I could just run and find another mum so as not to feel the loss.
Does that make sense? I mean, it would make more sense if you weren't saying it literally in my mum's house.
Yeah.
Oh, you're back already.
How did it go? I passed.
Oh, that's great news.
You passed your test? Yes.
Oh, that's amazing news, well don Thank you.
Great.
MUM CHUCKLES It's gluten-free.
Mum, why am I in a hat? I think hats suit you.
You should wear them more often.
Now, Simon, would you please give that to Orlando for me? Do cats eat cake? Do cats eat cake! Do cats eat cake?! Who wouldn't eat cake? He's in the front room watching the telly and he's halfway through Killing Eve.
Now, are you all right with this? Billy only told me this morning.
It's just for a few days.
I mean, what do you want me to say? It's super fucking weird.
I know.
But he's very good for Billy to be around right now.
Right, well, as long as he's good for Billy to be around, that's the main thing.
He ate the whole thing.
I buried my hamster in a massive New Kids On The Block poster.
Because I thought he was as big a fan as I was.
When my dog died, my parents told me that he had gone off to work in the movies.
Are you serious? Yeah, it seemed to me that all of our pets, like, eventually just got swept up in the Hollywood studio system.
Honestly, I thought I spotted our Alsatian Rex in Saving Private Ryan.
I was like, "Get off the beach, Rex, the Germans are coming!" That is incredible.
My dad still enjoys telling people how he pranked his innocent children.
I do love a prank, though.
It's funny when you get a good one.
Hey! That is so nuts.
Uh I haven't seen that guy for years.
We were in art college together.
Art college? Sorry.
Art college? It's just funny I should see him tonight, because I actually .
.
just started painting again and a little bit of sculpting, just doing some classes for an MA.
So you're an artist? Well You're like Irish Forrest Gump.
You've got all these secret little lives.
"First I worked in a bowling alley.
"Then I did the driving school.
"And now I went to art college.
" Very nice.
You're the first person I told, so I must really trust you.
Not even my best pals know the real reason I left the city was because I wanted to Follow your art.
Exactly.
Sorry.
I'm making such terrible jokes and I really want to say sorry for the Forrest Gump impression, it was really bad.
No, it was very good.
It was unacceptably bad.
And you handled it really well.
Yeah, so how long were you with your ex? Oh, God.
I meant to take that down.
I didn't know it was up there.
Um, about 12 years.
12 years is a long time.
Yeah, it's all finished.
How about you? You never What? You never talk about that part of your life.
Um, yeah, my last proper relationship was with Amanda.
I think I mentioned her to you.
Er And these are Amanda's grandparents.
Jeff and Denise.
Yeah, I vaguely remember you mentioning her.
We went out for five years.
Yeah, it You know, just fell apart, you know.
What's she like? Nice.
She was a PR exec from Norwich.
And? And, you know, she was just one of those people who said whatever she needed to get what she wanted.
And she told the most ridiculous lies.
What kind of lies? OK, OK, right.
We went to the cinema on a whim once.
We're standing there, choosing what film to see.
And she wants to see The Revenant.
And I say, you know, what about Arrival? The Amy Adams, aliens.
Yeah.
And she says, "Oh, no, I've already seen it.
" Right.
/font So I say, "When did you see it?" And she says, "Oh, a couple of weeks ago.
" So we go and see The Revenant.
We get it, Leo, you're cold.
Yeah, anyway.
It just plays on my mind.
I Google it Arrival had only been released that day.
She lied.
I see.
What? What do you see? God help anyone who comes between you and Amy Adams.
Well, she told worse lies than that, Marcella.
She was sleeping with her boss for over two years.
Oh, God, that's awful.
Sorry.
No, it's, um it's fine.
Jesus.
I'm telling you everything tonight.
What are we drinking - truth serum? Heh Talking of truth serum, er I wanted to say something to you, actually, about today.
OK.
It's a little bit awkward and I I'll get it, I'll get it, I'll get it.
OK! Where is he? Tanya.
I know he's here, I just need to see it for myself.
Who?/fo Tanya, you can't just walk in here.
.
.
fuck are you?! Another one.
Ha! You're probably married as well.
Sorry, who's this? This is Tanya.
Simon's wife.
Two in one day.
Do you know that, pretty boy? She was with my husband today.
Not like that, not like that.
He was in a towel.
Oh, my God, are YOU following me? Yes, because you're fucking my husband! I am not fucking I am not fucking her husband.
This is mad.
I know you are! The night before your junkie brother's intervention, you were with Simon.
That is when OK, Tanya, you have to go.
This is mad.
He was with you that night! The least you could do is admit it, because he tells me I'm going mad and I am not going mad.
I'm not.
Just tell me the truth, Marcella.
Because I need to know why my marriage is falling apart.
Please! Please, just tell me.
You have to speak to Simon about this.
Simon! OK, cunt.
I gave you a chance to be decent.
But you're not gonna.
So I'll go.
But I'll be watching ya.
I'm gonna take this fucking Haribo with me.
And your shit wine.
Go home to your wife, you slag.
Listen, you know, I'm going to head off.
That's why you were so weird.
On the date.
I sang.
Jon, nothing had happened between us.
I just made a mistake.
I got really drunk.
Fine, I did I just It's not a thing.
It's fine.
You've obviously just got some stuff to work through, so, yeah What, that's it? That's it between us? No, I'll see you Thursday.
What's Thursday? The lesson, Marcella.
Fuck.
Shut up! She's not gonna go.
Oi! Get off that car! Oh, shit.
No, Linda! No, Linda, no! Cheers, Linda.
Bedtime? Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm an actress.
Do you have a partner? I was with Simon for 12 years.
Two weeks after we broke up he got married.
Tania, this is Marcella.
It's just he married the first mess he met after me.
What is going well? I like John, my driving instructor.
John? I'm going to keep the knickers on for a bit, if that's OK with you.
I really enjoy your company.
How about, you know, we do something? I can show you my bowling alley? You ever taken drugs? My brother Billy has a proper drugs problem so I leave the drugs to him.
And have you ever done something you regretted? Did you shag John? Shhh.
Simon.
We have a lot of work to do.
A flower does not compete with the flower next to it, it just blooms.
As you begin to expand the vision you have of yourself, rid your mind of distractions and petty comparisons.
This is the beginning towards self-mastery.
Do this and you will see that loving vision of yourself reflected back in all areas of your life.
Live your life full of hope, free of fear.
Human beings have unlimited potential You can transform yourself wherever you are right now.
Today is the only day you will ever have.
Be grateful, be brave and be excellent.
Marcella, showtime.
For subtitling services, contatct: The plague lasted from 1665 to 1666.
Pain and misery stalked the streets.
I lost all of my teeth in 20 minutes.
It won't be long for me now.
Oh.
Oh You can almost smell her, can't ya? Oh! Oh The plague lasted from 1665 to 16 The plague lasted from 1665 to 1666 all of the Fast walkers here.
The plague lasted OK.
And don't forget to breathe.
God, don't forget to breathe.
You always say that, don't forget to breathe.
Who forgets to breathe? It's a ridiculous thing to say.
Don't forget Sorry, I'm just really nervous, I need to pass.
It's fine.
I've a good feeling about today.
Yeah, I think we'll be all done with this today.
You sound like you're getting sick of it Me.
No No, I Just, you know, pass, you know.
Marcella Donahue.
Ah, hi, Jane.
One of yours? Hopefully, not for much longer.
Oh, hey.
Party time.
Hey.
Bloody hell You don't half look like my Auntie Karen.
Oh Your Auntie Karen.
Oh, I eh.
.
I hope she's a good driver.
No, unfortunately not.
She's a racist old cunt who watches David Icke videos all day.
I mean, I'm not Start the engine.
Well.
That sigh tells me things didn't go our way? Thought you'd gone.
That examiner, I mean, that whole test It's OK Don't worry, you know, you'll get it next time.
Oh, no I You can put up with me and my lessons for a little bit longer, can't you? Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey.
Yeah, so I You know, I was pretty sure that you were going to pass today.
Yeah Me too.
It's just Yeah, no, so I You know, I booked dinner for us this evening, you know, to, eh .
.
to celebrate.
Oh, that's such a shame.
That would've been .
.
that would've been so nice.
Yeah, so um Maybe we should still go.
Yes.
Yeah? We should definitely still go.
That sounds ideal.
Do you mind not touching yourself up in a communal area, Marcella? I was doing .
.
my No.
No.
.
.
excited No.
.
.
dance.
Thank you.
I don't mean to piss on your tits but Someone's following you.
What? Who, a killer? No, no, not You need to stop listening to them fucking murder podcasts.
Killer My guess is it's the DSS.
I'm not on the dole, Linda.
Oh, come off it, Marcella.
All actors are on the dole.
Except Anthony Hopkins.
Are you Anthony Hopkins, Marcella? I work, you know I work.
You've see me leaving dressed as a bear.
Do you think I dress as a bear to get dick? Oh, well See for yourself.
This is stupid.
You're bringing a lot of heat around here.
Well, it seems like the DSS have just driven off so I cannot offer you my loyalty in this situation.
If they aks me, I have to tell them everything I know.
Well Since you open and read literally every piece of mail I get, you're going to have a lot to tell them.
You filthy rat! You filthy, stinking, Tory rat! Oh, you're so hot.
Shut up, rat! What? Filthy, Tory rat God, no, wait.
Did she see you? Don't say it to her, she'll be so embarrassed, OK? How can I not say it to her? Don't say it to her? You don't know what I've seen.
I say everything to her.
Yeah, that's because you're a massive co-dependent with no boundaries.
I'm not co-dependent, I'm old-fashioned needy.
Stop pathologising my wonderful personality, she's into rats, mate.
Rat banging.
OK Why don't you see it as a test? Respect her boundaries, don't say anything to her, just .
.
let it be.
OK, I'll let it be.
Won't ask her about the rat stuff.
Good luck.
Won't find out about the rats.
I don't care about the rats.
I'm so sorry.
I thought you were going to your mum's.
We got carried away.
Yes So So How did it go? The test? Oh, my God.
Yeah, I passed my test.
What? I passed my test.
That is great.
Third time lucky.
Yeah.
What's wrong? So I tiny I let John think that I failed, so that I could carry on with the lessons.
What? You're an .
.
absolute psychopath.
I know, I just, I panicked, I thought he didn't want to see me any more and Co-dependent as fuck, mate.
OK, but listen.
It's all fine cos I'm seeing him tonight and if you confess a lie within 24 hours, it sort of comes under the remit of a prank, right? You know, like, "Oh, I was joking, earlier on when I said I failed, "but really I passed.
" Like a prank.
Erm, yeah, Prankie Boyle.
It's Prankie.
Prankie goes to Hollywood.
Have you met my old mate, Pranco? Get off me, you, get .
.
rat fucker.
No boundaries.
I knew you heard.
Mark, she heard.
Well, you held out for longer than I thought you would.
Congrats on the test.
I hear you're into pranks now.
Marcella Good to see you.
How have you been? I mean, really great.
I just passed my Oh.
Do you mind, actually? Cos, erm, I have agreed for a student to sit in on the sessions.
So, do you actually mind waiting until Frances gets here? Cos I don't want to waste the good stuff.
The good stuff? I'm actually doing OK if you must know so I don't know if it's a good idea Do you mind if we just wait? Can I ask how you've been? Yeah, very good, thank you.
I bought some Yayzees.
Yayzees? Kanye West designs them? Yeezys.
I don't like them.
Hello.
Oh Frances, wonderful, you're here.
Hello, hi, I'm Frances Owen.
Hello.
I really appreciate you letting me sit in on your sessions.
It's going to be most useful for my research.
I've actually been reading some of Graham's case notes.
Some really harrowing stuff.
Harrowing? Wouldn't say harrowing.
No, no.
And it's that keep-going spirit that I'm deeply interested in.
I mean, how does someone sustain that spirit when time after time life just lets her down? How old are you? I'm 19.
Right.
So Shall we shall we begin then? Great.
This is going to be fun.
Marcella .
.
how have things been? Really, really good.
I just I just passed my driving test today.
Very good.
Good.
What? What are you not saying? Lying to someone to stay in contact with them because you're romantically interested in them.
That's not very healthy.
It was more of an omission, it's fine, I'm going to sort it.
It's a big deal, Marcella.
Have you lied before to manipulate men into liking you, or spending time with you? No, no.
Once.
That was such a great story.
The bit where you lost your tickets and then found them again, was my favourite bit.
Yeah, it's wild, right? Checked that pocket twice but no So crazy.
Hey What kind of girls are you into? Oh, you know, kind of punky, tattoo, piercing kind of thing? Me too.
What, you like punky girls? No.
I don't no.
But I like ink.
And I'm covered in tattoos.
Where? Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, I need to I need to go to the bathroom.
Is that a tattoo of a horse wearing boots? Yeah.
That was so cool.
Yeah, it was really good fun oh! See ya.
All right.
So, you don't find yourself lovable as you are? Pretending to be someone or something else in order to .
.
LURE men into bed.
I don't LURE men into bed.
I'm not Rose West for Christ's sake.
I lied about a tattoo once.
And to be fair I was pretty resourceful.
I only had a blue bingo marker so And what about your ex .
.
Simon? Did you lie to him? I was just coming to that, Frances.
OK.
Good.
Yes.
Er Well I guess I pretended I didn't want kids.
So, yeah, next question.
What do you lie about the most? I was just I'm on my way.
I'm on my way.
I'm on my way.
But when you text me, you're on your way, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mum, I forgot my keys.
What the fuck? Come in? Oh, thank you for inviting me into my mother's house while you're naked.
I mean, you know, it just made sense, really.
It's only a couple of days and then Billy said that I could just move in with him and Skinny Pete.
OK, wait, I'm sorry, I'm confused.
How is? Are you and Tania splitting up properly, then? Well, I mean, it's all up in the air at the minute.
You know, we're just having a bit of space, get our heads together.
Simon, it's not cos of what happened with us, is it? No, no, it's not I mean, listen, realising that I still have, HAD, feelings for you is not It wasn't ideal.
But I think Mum dying just made me snap out of everything.
Losing someone you love so much so suddenly just sort of blows your heart apart, you know.
Not all feelings survive that sort of explosion.
After we split up, I just ran straight into another relationship, so to not feel Did you? I didn't notice.
Oh, yeah, I did.
Two weeks.
You got married after two weeks.
Madness and I When Mum died, it's not like I could just run and find another mum so as not to feel the loss.
Does that make sense? I mean, it would make more sense if you weren't saying it literally in my mum's house.
Yeah.
Oh, you're back already.
How did it go? I passed.
Oh, that's great news.
You passed your test? Yes.
Oh, that's amazing news, well don Thank you.
Great.
MUM CHUCKLES It's gluten-free.
Mum, why am I in a hat? I think hats suit you.
You should wear them more often.
Now, Simon, would you please give that to Orlando for me? Do cats eat cake? Do cats eat cake! Do cats eat cake?! Who wouldn't eat cake? He's in the front room watching the telly and he's halfway through Killing Eve.
Now, are you all right with this? Billy only told me this morning.
It's just for a few days.
I mean, what do you want me to say? It's super fucking weird.
I know.
But he's very good for Billy to be around right now.
Right, well, as long as he's good for Billy to be around, that's the main thing.
He ate the whole thing.
I buried my hamster in a massive New Kids On The Block poster.
Because I thought he was as big a fan as I was.
When my dog died, my parents told me that he had gone off to work in the movies.
Are you serious? Yeah, it seemed to me that all of our pets, like, eventually just got swept up in the Hollywood studio system.
Honestly, I thought I spotted our Alsatian Rex in Saving Private Ryan.
I was like, "Get off the beach, Rex, the Germans are coming!" That is incredible.
My dad still enjoys telling people how he pranked his innocent children.
I do love a prank, though.
It's funny when you get a good one.
Hey! That is so nuts.
Uh I haven't seen that guy for years.
We were in art college together.
Art college? Sorry.
Art college? It's just funny I should see him tonight, because I actually .
.
just started painting again and a little bit of sculpting, just doing some classes for an MA.
So you're an artist? Well You're like Irish Forrest Gump.
You've got all these secret little lives.
"First I worked in a bowling alley.
"Then I did the driving school.
"And now I went to art college.
" Very nice.
You're the first person I told, so I must really trust you.
Not even my best pals know the real reason I left the city was because I wanted to Follow your art.
Exactly.
Sorry.
I'm making such terrible jokes and I really want to say sorry for the Forrest Gump impression, it was really bad.
No, it was very good.
It was unacceptably bad.
And you handled it really well.
Yeah, so how long were you with your ex? Oh, God.
I meant to take that down.
I didn't know it was up there.
Um, about 12 years.
12 years is a long time.
Yeah, it's all finished.
How about you? You never What? You never talk about that part of your life.
Um, yeah, my last proper relationship was with Amanda.
I think I mentioned her to you.
Er And these are Amanda's grandparents.
Jeff and Denise.
Yeah, I vaguely remember you mentioning her.
We went out for five years.
Yeah, it You know, just fell apart, you know.
What's she like? Nice.
She was a PR exec from Norwich.
And? And, you know, she was just one of those people who said whatever she needed to get what she wanted.
And she told the most ridiculous lies.
What kind of lies? OK, OK, right.
We went to the cinema on a whim once.
We're standing there, choosing what film to see.
And she wants to see The Revenant.
And I say, you know, what about Arrival? The Amy Adams, aliens.
Yeah.
And she says, "Oh, no, I've already seen it.
" Right.
/font So I say, "When did you see it?" And she says, "Oh, a couple of weeks ago.
" So we go and see The Revenant.
We get it, Leo, you're cold.
Yeah, anyway.
It just plays on my mind.
I Google it Arrival had only been released that day.
She lied.
I see.
What? What do you see? God help anyone who comes between you and Amy Adams.
Well, she told worse lies than that, Marcella.
She was sleeping with her boss for over two years.
Oh, God, that's awful.
Sorry.
No, it's, um it's fine.
Jesus.
I'm telling you everything tonight.
What are we drinking - truth serum? Heh Talking of truth serum, er I wanted to say something to you, actually, about today.
OK.
It's a little bit awkward and I I'll get it, I'll get it, I'll get it.
OK! Where is he? Tanya.
I know he's here, I just need to see it for myself.
Who?/fo Tanya, you can't just walk in here.
.
.
fuck are you?! Another one.
Ha! You're probably married as well.
Sorry, who's this? This is Tanya.
Simon's wife.
Two in one day.
Do you know that, pretty boy? She was with my husband today.
Not like that, not like that.
He was in a towel.
Oh, my God, are YOU following me? Yes, because you're fucking my husband! I am not fucking I am not fucking her husband.
This is mad.
I know you are! The night before your junkie brother's intervention, you were with Simon.
That is when OK, Tanya, you have to go.
This is mad.
He was with you that night! The least you could do is admit it, because he tells me I'm going mad and I am not going mad.
I'm not.
Just tell me the truth, Marcella.
Because I need to know why my marriage is falling apart.
Please! Please, just tell me.
You have to speak to Simon about this.
Simon! OK, cunt.
I gave you a chance to be decent.
But you're not gonna.
So I'll go.
But I'll be watching ya.
I'm gonna take this fucking Haribo with me.
And your shit wine.
Go home to your wife, you slag.
Listen, you know, I'm going to head off.
That's why you were so weird.
On the date.
I sang.
Jon, nothing had happened between us.
I just made a mistake.
I got really drunk.
Fine, I did I just It's not a thing.
It's fine.
You've obviously just got some stuff to work through, so, yeah What, that's it? That's it between us? No, I'll see you Thursday.
What's Thursday? The lesson, Marcella.
Fuck.
Shut up! She's not gonna go.
Oi! Get off that car! Oh, shit.
No, Linda! No, Linda, no! Cheers, Linda.
Bedtime? Yeah.
Yeah.