Kung Fu Panda: The Dragon Knight (2022) s02e01 Episode Script

1
Whoa! Ah!
[munches]
Skadoosh!
[Po] Several weeks ago,
the former Dragon Master Po
vowed to serve a brave knight,
who is not actually a knight
- Hey!
- in her mission to stop two evil mages.
The weasels sought
the four legendary Tianshang weapons,
hoping to unite them and resurrect
an ancient army of the dead!
[demon snarls]
Now the world's fate
rests on the shoulders
of this newly formed elite squad
made up of one kung fu master
one chivalrous warrior
who's not technically a knight
Must you keep bringing that up?
a master thief slash con artist
with a heart of gold
Take that back. I'm heartless.
and the world's greatest dad.
And?
Uh, world's greatest noodle maker?
You got that right.
We must find
the remaining Tianshang weapons
before Klaus and Veruca,
or else be doomed to a world of
Um, a world of
Uh What's a good word for evil?
I feel like I use that a bunch.
Badness.
Badditude?
Badditude!
[Rukhmini sighs]
Welcome to India.
It's good to be home.
India is beautiful.
- This has been here this whole time?
- [Blade] Mm-hm.
[birds chirping]
[sighs]
[sighs]
Goodbye, China.
I'll be back soon!
[Po] Whoa!
[Po grunts]
- [insects chirping]
- [frogs ribbiting]
[grabs object]
My name is Luthera of Landreth,
Knight of England.
[Colin] She's no knight!
[Po] All of it was a lie.
[Po] Blade, check it out.
Pandas conserve energy
by rolling downhill.
And it's fun!
See ya!
[Po yells]
He's very good at conserving energy.
[groans] I've got nothing better to do.
[Rukhmini chuckles]
[laughter and yelling]
[Blade] Huh?
[sighs]
Whoa. Whoa!
Whoa! [grunts]
[laughs]
Are you sure she knows
where the Tianshang weapons are? Huh?
I'm starting to wonder myself.
[Rukhmini] I can hear you.
[others gasp]
Have you ever heard of
Master Mastodon's enchanted pendant?
[chuckles] No, duh. Read all about it
in the Time Before Time saga.
[Po gasps]
Legend says, if you wear the pendant
it'll lead you to his mighty Storm Wheels.
Or turn you inside out.
[laughs] Awesome!
So you have this pendant?
No. My partner does.
- [Blade groans]
- [Po] Mm-hm.
She's a wretched, duplicitous thief.
Name's Diya.
We met trying to con
the Sultan of Delhi. [chuckles]
She tried to throw me from a tower.
I tried to drown her in a fountain.
[others gasp]
She sent me this letter right before
I got trapped in that giant walking rock.
Claimed she found the pendant
and was bringing it home.
- Hey!
- [Rukhmini] Listen up.
My city's just over that hill,
and it isn't exactly friendly
to outsiders.
It's filled with thieves,
cheats, cutthroats. [chuckles]
I'm basically their queen,
but you're all fresh meat.
- [Po] Oh!
- [Mr. Ping] Huh?
So, keep your eyes down
until we get to my hideout,
and at least try to look tough.
- [Mr. Ping gulps]
- [Po inhales deeply]
- [up-tempo music playing]
- [cheering and laughter]
[Po] You sure we're in the right place?
Uh, what is this?
Where are the seedy cafés?
Where are the pickpockets?
Oh, what happened to this dump?
Guess a lot has changed since you left.
In a family-friendly kind of way.
Welcome. Anyone care for
a ride around our beautiful city?
You, stay away from us. We're scum.
Ooh!
Uh
What's wrong with your face?
- What do you mean?
- You're acting all giddy.
- Oh. Am I not allowed to be giddy?
- No, you're allowed. Totally allowed.
You just never struck me as,
like, a giddy kinda person.
[vendor snoring]
[Po gasps]
[grunts]
Mm! Do you smell something?
[all sniffing]
- Cumin?
- Cardamom?
- Turmeric?
- Uh, ginger?
Saffron?
It's all of them, Po.
[both] All of them!
All of them.
- [Mr. Ping chuckles]
- [Po] Hm
What's happening to you?
[vendor snorts]
- Your hottest dish, please.
- What?!
Huh?
[slurping]
[Blade gulps]
Huh?
- Mm.
- Hm.
[burps]
Huh?
Huh?!
[slurping]
One more samosa.
- [Mr. Ping farts]
- I ate too much.
Slight problem.
I think we lost our guide.
[gasps]
Uh-uh. There are no thieves
in this city, Auntie. [chuckles]
Wanna bet?
[Po] Uh
Nana [chuckles]
I told you we already have enough
um, ornate glass cupware.
- [vendor] Huh?
- I'm so sorry. We'll be on our way.
Hm
Wait. Your staff.
That's an interesting piece. Quite old.
Doubt it's worth much,
but I'll give two pieces of silver for it.
- Ha!
- Three.
Ha-ha! We really need
to bop on outta here, so
Seven.
I'd never sell it.
Not for three, not for seven,
not here, not to you, and not to anyone.
- Fifty silver.
- Sold.
What? Nope. No.
Sorry. Not for sale. Gotta go. Bye!
Hm
What was that?
You can't sell the Whip of Endless Flame!
Relax. I would have double-crossed him
if you'd let me get there.
Oh, look at this fabric.
It's like music for the eyes.
- Mm
- [Po] What's going on with you?
You're usually all, "Po, focus."
"Concentrate." "Get your hands
out of that chocolate fountain."
Okay. So, what are you saying?
[groans] I'm saying get your hands out of
that chocolate fountain!
We have a secret hideout to find.
Hm
Ah, yes. This is right.
It's right over here.
Our secret
[laughter and cheering]
hideout.
O-oh, so
[up-tempo music playing]
this is not how you left it?
[giggling]
[sharks squeaking]
[Blade laughs]
This is a profoundly violent game.
[Blade laughs]
[sharks squeaking]
[grunts]
Okay, I gotta figure out
what Rukhmini's walked us into.
But something's going on with Blade,
and she won't tell me what.
- Could you talk to her?
- Well, we only just became frenemies.
Why would she tell me? Oh
Because you're a great listener.
Uh, sorry. Uh, what was that?
- I had a song stuck in my head.
- [Rukhmini grunts]
[Rukhmini grunts]
Okay, she's moving kids around.
Thanks, Dad. Good luck.
Uh, what was that, huh?
Oh, oh, oh. Just gonna
I was gonna put it back where I found it.
Ah. I had a secret hatch
where I kept all my most precious finds.
[solid thuds]
Diya would have left me a clue.
She loves clues. It was her specialty.
Hey, is it possible that
you made up this story about the pendant,
and the city, and the old partner,
and now you're kinda trapped in a lie?
Tell me, Po
[hatch creaks]
Is this a lie?
Uh Hm?
[Rukhmini gasps]
[Rukhmini exhales shakily]
It's all gone.
Like everything else in this city.
[groans] Just like my life.
Huh?
[female voice]
Welcome to Villains Canteen,
where every dish
comes with a side of danger.
- Something to drink?
- [Rukhmini gulps]
Diya?
- [shark squeaks]
- So long, little man.
Uh, so [chuckles]
Uh, Po thinks maybe
you need to talk to someone.
Oh, no! He's back! [laughs]
[gasps]
You will be my greatest challenge.
[shark squeaks]
[Mr. Ping] Hm
Uh, come with me.
I'm gonna make you a nice bowl of noodles.
No!
Wait!
- [Diya] Something to drink?
- Diya?
Sorry, who are you?
[Rukhmini gasps]
Who am I?
It's me, Rukhmini.
- [Diya] Something to drink?
- Ah
Okay, I see what you're doing.
A little con for old times' sake.
Very funny.
I need to get these orders
to the kitchen, so
Why you deceitful little [grunts]
So sorry. My nana's a little lost.
Uh-huh. Well,
get your nana under control, or leave.
[Rukhmini yells]
[Rukhmini grunts]
[onlookers gasp]
That's it.
Get out of my restaurant!
[fighting grunts]
[Po] Uh [chuckles nervously]
[Rukhmini grunts]
- [Diya gasps]
- [Rukhmini yells]
[fighting grunts]
- [gasps]
- [Rukhmini yells]
[Diya groans]
[Diya panting]
[Rukhmini chuckles]
You can live up to who you are,
or die a liar.
- [girl] Amma?
- Huh?
[girl] What's going on?
[Diya] Uh
[chuckles nervously]
Give it up for Rukhmini, everyone!
[diners murmuring]
The star of our new live show
here at Villains Canteen.
- [Diya sighs]
- [scattered applause]
Take a bow, then come with me.
Now, you sit,
and I'll make the noodles. [chuckles]
Hm
When I was young,
I wanted a life of adventure.
Though, I never thought
I would be a noodle shop owner.
What happened?
Well, something out of my control.
Life.
I always thought I would be a knight
and now that's gone.
[Mr. Ping] Ah.
Life's recipe can be hard to follow.
It changes on you.
Wait. I thought
you were going to make noodles.
Well, sometimes we need to toss the recipe
and make our own rules.
Mm. Mm! This is really good.
Oh! Oh
[Blade] Hm
Our own rules.
I want to be a knight.
I want a sword and a mission.
[adult Blade] Knights don't have feelings.
Knights don't have doubt.
Toss the recipe and make our own rules.
[Po] You can teach me how to be a knight,
and I can teach you kung fu.
Ursa Major! [echoing]
[Rukhmini] Ever heard of
Master Mastodon's enchanted pendant?
I had a secret hatch
where I kept all my most precious finds.
No more rules.
[Mr. Ping] Huh?
Uh, w-what are you doing?
[pots shattering]
[Mr. Ping gasps]
[Mr. Ping yells]
[solid thuds]
[diners gasp]
[Blade grunts]
[solid thuds]
[hollow thud]
- [gasps]
- [pots shattering]
We need more sambaram, please!
It's okay, kutti.
Take care of the customers.
I need a moment.
- You have a daughter?
- You do?
- I'm an auntie?
- You are.
No. You won't talk to Padma.
She knows nothing of my old life.
Huh? You don't want her to know
you were an absolute legend?
[Diya sighs]
Things are different now, Rukhi.
After you disappeared,
a developer bought up half the city
and cleared out our crew.
It was either jail or this.
So, did you really find
Master Mastodon's enchanted pendant?
He gets very excited.
[Diya sighs]
Yes, I found the pendant,
but I couldn't figure out how it worked,
so I sold it.
[gasps] Sold it?!
To who?
I want to help you,
but I have too much to lose now.
[Rukhmini chuckles]
And yet so much more to gain.
[Rukhmini cackles]
[Diya gasps]
- [Po gasps]
- [Rukhmini chuckles]
[Rukhmini cackles]
You found the Fire Whip.
[Blade] And I found the pendant.
[Mr. Ping panting]
- [Po gasps]
- You con artist!
[scoffs] Some necklace. Who cares?
Then you won't mind if we take it.
[Po] Blade!
[Blade] No rules, Po. No rules!
No!
- What did you say to her?
- Well, I gave her the recipe speech, uh
Well, she said
she can't be a knight anymore,
uh, a-and then, uh, she went ballistic!
[Blade panting]
- [Po grunts]
- [clattering]
Ow!
Ha-ha! You're getting slow, old woman!
You always were the slow one.
Oh! That's because you cheat!
[panting]
[Diya grunts]
[grunts]
- Please, no! Please stop!
- [water lapping]
What you hold is a pendant,
but not the pendant.
Last chance.
I gave
Master Mastodon's pendant to Jayesh.
The man who cleaned up the city.
Now, can I please have my necklace?
Found it in Marrakesh.
But then you never came home,
and I never got
the chance to give it to you.
So, you did miss this.
Us.
If you're going to steal from Jayesh,
you'll need my help.
[footsteps]
Hey, it's not over.
Once we catch Klaus and Veruca,
the Queen will see she was wrong
and make you, like, Head Knight.
They'll be writing about you
in that Knight's Code book.
No, Po, it is over.
All I have left
is finding Klaus and Veruca,
avenging my brother.
No more knighthood.
And no more rules.
- [grunts]
- No, wait!
[water bubbling]
- [Veruca] Master Ostrich's Helm of Winds.
- [whip cracking]
Last seen east of the West Ocean,
where the North meets the South.
[whipping continues]
Will you please stop that?
- [whip cracks]
- We've got a problem.
It's a fake.
[wind gusting]
[ship rumbling]
Hm?
[wind gusting]
[both gasp]
[grunts]
- [ship creaking]
- Wha?
[both gasp]
Maybe we don't need to find that helmet.
Maybe it found us.