Men in Trees s02e01 Episode Script

Previously on Men in Trees when did you two start sleeping together? Buzz is married? She's an import -- a mail-order bride.
I love you very much.
She needs her artificial sunlight to keep from getting really cranky.
I really wanted to be near you.
So, you're not married anymore? Divorced.
Have a kid.
Sara jackson.
You've been served.
Will you please marry me? I'll marry you, patrick.
Is it for sale? The cabin.
I'll fix it up.
I came by to plant you a housewarming gift.
I want to take you up on your oer to work on my house.
We're gonna be roommates? If you want to go back to your pregnant ex-girlfriend, that's fine with me.
You just lost yourself a great catch.
Maybe we should get married.
You know what I'll never get? Is why you could open your heart to someone who broke it into pieces but you couldn't open it to someone who just wanted to heal it.
I'm sorry.
So am I.
"The day had turned stor in the kingdom far, far away.
" I can't see! It's getting worse.
Stay close.
Keep your head down, all right.
Follow the trail.
Cash! "The fair princess was lost.
" Cash! "And the sky was dark gray.
" This part's scary.
Can we go back to the beginning? It's okay.
It all wks out in the end.
I'm not so sure about that.
I had an arctic cyclone blow my ro off once.
Not helping, jerome.
Thanks for looking after him, lynn.
No problem.
How you doin', buddy? I'm okay.
Yeah? Mai.
Mai.
Damn it, woman, talk to me! Talk to the second hand! Is it working? Since I still want to kill you, no.
Are you sure you want tmake that move? I'm good.
Like candy from a baby.
Won again.
Hey, guys.
I'm worried about marin.
I left a note on her door.
She wasn't home yet? She went up accokeek earlier.
I thought she'd be here by now.
She's up on a mountain? What? Cash! It's all right.
Okay, keep your eye on the trail.
Cash! "She knew there were bread crumbs that marked her way, but now she couldn't find them.
" Will she be okay? She'll be okay.
We'll all be okay.
"Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away " a princess was home in her castle, preparing for the new day.
" "While she was working, up in the sky, dark, ink-black clouds started dancing by.
" Kind of scary for a kid.
It's a fairy tale.
I just bought it.
I like fairy tales.
You know, they're scary in the middle, but then it works out in the end.
I find the rhymes both didactic and oversimplistic.
It's for her baby, jerome.
It's supposed to be simple.
Buying books already? What's it gonna be, one of them suzuki kids? There's nothing wrong with looking ahead.
I have a whole bag of special things I'm saving for this kid.
Hey, guys.
What will it be? Two tuna specials, theresa.
And a huge congratulations! You two are getting married! We are.
Thanks.
Come on, let me see.
Mai.
Holy buddha! You must really love this guy,'cause that is one tiny rock.
He bought it for me in high school.
It has a sentimental value.
We wish you two the very best.
Yes, may you be as blessed as this old man and me.
Yep.
We're coming up on our 10th anniversary.
Still feel like we were made for each other.
That's sweet.
You want some lunch? A hand? I've got it.
I'm on a roll.
I'm gonna get this writer's room finished by the end of this weekend if it kills me.
Slow down.
It's ambitious.
I know.
But ambitious is how I used to be! Before I got all hung up on all this stupid boy stuff and lost my writing mojo.
Speaking of boys, that tree jack gave me has got to go.
It's blocking my inspirational view.
It's two feet tall.
Now.
sure.
But in a year, it's gonna be taller than me.
You've got to look ahead, cash.
And down.
Holy crap.
Proudly Presents that's great.
You've actually managed topaint yourself into a corner.
Ho ho ho ho.
You're next, buddy.
notice of hearing What's that? What? That.
It looks official.
What, you got jury duty? I wish.
It's a summons.
My, um, ex is suing mefor full custody of matty.
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
Thanks.
Do you havea good lawyer? Not yet.
Hey, listen, they can be expensive.
If you need a loanor anything.
Thank you.
I'll be okay.
oh, hey, marin.
Congratulations.
Great news.
for you.
Thanks.
Did you justplay some paintball? No, I was paintingmy new writing room.
Thank you very much.
Or it painted you.
Oh, ho ho ho.
That's great, marin.
Good to have a new project.
After the jack debacle.
No debacle, jerome.
Girl comes to alaska, falls for mountain man.
He marries someone else.
It's "brokeback marin.
" We had a fling, people.
Nothing to recover from.
I am deliriously happysetting up my new home.
Once I geta fortifying lunch here, I am moving onto landscaping.
Well, you better getyour outdoor work done soon.
We've got a big rainstormcoming in.
Nothinglike the arctic cyclone they're dueto get up near anchorage.
"Arctic cyclone"? Those are two wordsyou don't hear much in new york.
Along with "excuse me"and "rent-control.
" Cyclones are pretty wild.
You get rain, snow, winds, flooding.
You have to be prepared foreverything up here, don't you? Yeah, storms, heartbreak, the arrivalof morgan fairchild.
Morgan fairchildvisited elmo? Not yet.
Just putting itout there in the universe.
Okay.
Okay, people, the latest marine weather report still showsthe arctic cyclone passing wellto the west of us, but this is a good time to review your emergencyprocedures and check your roofs.
We haveemergency procedures? Sure, you should always have a bag prepackedwith your essential items -- toothpaste, numchuks, whatnot.
Numchuks? That's my bag.
You make your own.
And then we all meetat the chieftain.
Did jerome come upwith that? No, it has thick wallsand food.
Oh, and you should knowwhere you, uh, fall on the"case of emergence-tree.
" The what? It's elmo's versionof a phone tree.
But not everybodyhas a phone, so we go house to house, Each person in chargeof another person.
Look.
I just added you.
Oh, I'm honored.
Well, who am I in charge of? Well, no one yet.
'Cause you're the end.
I thoughtI'd start you off slow.
Good thinking.
All right, you are on.
Hey, elmo.
I have been hard at work, trying to dig upthis little tree in my backyard.
But the thingjust won't budge.
Well, that shouldn't surprise me, seeing thatit is an elmo tree, and elmois town so tight that even the treeswant to stick around.
But still, it amazes me.
This town.
That tree.
How can something so smallhave such deep roots? Hey, you leaving me? I'm putting togetherour emergency bag, silly.
I should have done ityears ago.
Hmm, well, don't forgetto pack my slippers and my super bowlsuspenders.
How are suspendersgonna help you in an emergency? You ever try running with your pantsdown around your ankles? Okay, old man, I'll pack your suspenders, right afterI find your birth certificate.
"Brides"? Gee wong? Dick? Ready for bed? What are you doingin my closet? I was checking outyour moth situation, and I am happy to reportthat you are 100% insect-free.
You can't go in there.
Why? There's something in thereI didn't want you to know about.
Oh, are you hidingmy birthday present in there? Not exactly.
I don't have timefor your little games.
I just want tohang up.
Dear god, what is that? I passed gas.
In my closet? I didn't want to do itin front of you.
It's too earlyin the relationship.
I was trying tokeep the romance alive.
The cat'sout of that closet.
I would have lit a match, but I didn't want your acrylicuniforms to go up in flames.
Next time, just get yourself outside before you do.
that.
I'll try.
But it's hard to control.
Well, try.
All right.
I don't supposewe could still -- no! You're up early.
Stupid tree.
Stupid jack tree.
Come inside, I've got something that might cheer you up, princess.
I finished the floorfor you.
I can see that.
And put up some shelves.
And you're welcome.
Cash, this was my floorto finish, not yours.
You had no rightto do this.
Just trying to help.
I don't need your help.
Man, you are cranky.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean tojump all over you.
I'm just annoyed that I can't getanything done these days.
I can help youwith that.
I am not sleepingwith you.
I'm not talking sex.
I'm talkingspiritual rebirth.
So, he's a therapist? He's morelike a soul healer.
Wait a minute, he's not one of those quacks who's gonna charge me $500to clean my aura? Master toddreally helped me.
Master todd?Seriously?That's his name? Yes, it is.
And I suggestyou open your mind a little.
Where doesthis guy live? Wait a minute.
Are you taking meto see rumpelstiltskin? Sorry.
Opening, opening.
What was that? Namaste! We're here.
This is quite an officeyou have.
May I touch your head? Tongue.
Tongue.
Show him your tongue.
Oh, boy.
What? You're stuck.
Yeah.
I'm up a tree, so good call.
I can't work with this.
He can't work with this.
Yeah, I heard him.
Uh, may I ask whereyou got your therapy degree, where you went to school? Devry.
The technical institute? You went to study therapy there? Semiconductor nufacturing.
This isn't about me.
This is about you.
You keep trying tomove forward, but you're stuckin a moment of great pain.
You can't let go.
Jack.
Jack? Kerouac --I did est training with him one summer back in malibu.
He told meabout the rocks.
What rocks? Well, you must write downevery issue, every negative thought that'sholding you back on a rock.
Uh, blue for you.
Red for her.
And thenyou go up a mountain, and you throwall your burdens away.
Only thenwill you be free.
That's it? Pay the guy.
How much? I don't do thisfor the money.
Is a 20 okay? Thank you, master todd.
Call me todd.
It has been an experience, todd.
Uh, not you.
Mom? Yes, baby? Can I havemy night-light? Of course you can.
It's scary tonight.
It's just the wind.
Nothing bad'sgonna happen to you.
Promise? I promise.
I will alwaystake care of you.
You knowI'm only doing this so I can write about itfor my book.
Maybe master toddmeant you'd feel better if you drank somethingon the rocks, like vodka.
You drink too much.
Done.
Where's your "jack" rock? He doesn't deserve a rock.
Isn't he kind ofa big issue for you? Oh, why is everyone hung upon this? I just think you have togive yourself permission to mournwhat you and jack had.
It was real.
It happened.
It takes timeto get over that.
I know it happened.
He's the onewho seems to have forgotten and gotten engagedto someone else.
Bitter.
Wouldn't it be great if all problems couldbe solved with a rock? Everything okay? It will be.
I'm fine.
Are you sure? You want a rock? I think you bettersave those for yourself.
How's it going? Listen, the offeryou made the other day? The loan? Yeah, it still stands.
Thanks, I'm gonna take you up on it because it's for matty, and I will pay you guys back.
I know.
Thank you.
- It's coming.
- What is? The cyclone.
It's heading right for us.
We've got to get everybodyto safety right now.
I'll start the tree.
what kind of persononly has one trouble? I'm a simple guy.
you really need to takeyourad light to the chieftain? Yes.
Yes, I do.
Who knows how longwe're gonna be there? Without it, my emotions are like an out-of-controlteacup ride.
What are you doing? I get gassywhen I'm nervous.
I'm trying to be discreet.
We're already outside.
You were downwind.
Dick, for god's sake.
Come on.
Only my wifecould take one hour -- one hour -- to put on her makeupto go sit in a dark bar.
Sorry, maybe number onewould have been faster.
What? That's it.
I'm out of here.
You should drive alone.
Maybe that way, you see anythingby the side of the road that you like better than me, you can feel free to stop! Woman.
Woman! Woman, what the hellis wrong with you? I'm sloppy second! Oh, geez.
You mean,"oh, gee-wong!" I knew her, buzz.
Girl had only two teethin her whole mouth.
And they were black! Looked like little dominos! That why she'snot smiling in the picture with her mouth open! Wait a minute.
Hold on.
Mai, let me explain.
How could you lie to meall those years? "Okay"? I movealfwayaround the world for some manwho thinks I'm just "okay"? All right, this girlwas my first choice on paper.
But she was, uh, on layaway for some other guy.
Perfect, becauseyou're gonna be laying away from me now, too.
But, mai.
when you walkedinto that hotel room, I knewyou were meant for me.
If I saw your real application, believe me, you wouldn't evenmake my top 10! You saidyou were a great cook and you gave foot rubs.
And, oh, you were gonnaserenade your wife every night withyour beautiful singing voice! So I exaggerated.
You've neversung to me once, buzz! Not once!Nothing!Zip! Not once! Look, we've got to get to the chieftain.
So, come on, baby.
Get in the truck, and we'll discuss itwhen we get there, okay? Oh, you! Ot rubs, my ass.
Come on, take a shift.
Help a burdened girl out.
Sorry.
Your problems, your weight.
You can't short-circuitthe process.
Oh, fine.
I bet there are some burdensI can let go of.
"Don't exercise.
I thinkmy 50-pound bag and i have pven otherwisetoday.
So, what's your one trouble? None of your business.
You're withholding.
You need a second rock for that.
Hey, welcoto the elmo hilton.
Is everyone here? Yeah, getting there.
It's really gonna hit us, huh? Dead on in about an hour or so.
I'm glad you're here.
Oh, let me get that.
I have some of my stufffor the baby.
If we're here long enoughfor you to drop that thing, we're gonna needanother keg.
Checkers? Checkers? Checkers? Okay, sure.
I should warn you, I am quite good at games.
Bring it on, red.
Nachos? Annie hates cheese, soI need to keep away from her.
Who hates cheese? That's crazy.
My fianc.
It's oneof the many things we're learningabout each other before we wed.
Everything I learn, I love her more.
Dick, where's my sad light? Okeydokey.
I may have left itat your place.
when I had to.
and then I.
well, you know.
is this a word game? 'Cause ifso, you should count annie in.
Yes.
Yes, it is.
The word is "fart.
" Dick farted, and nowI don't have my light machine! I have a slightflatulence problem, made worse by onions and, perhaps, your mother.
Okay, well, no nachos for you.
big guy.
Don't -- don't learn too muchabout annie.
Sooner or later, you might find something you wish you hadn'T.
Okay, are you ready? Yep.
Done.
Show-off.
Goodbye,"missing deadlines.
" See you.
"eating carbs.
" This doesfeel pretty good.
What? I don't like the looksof those clouds down there.
We needanother 10 beers.
Coming up.
I'll put on coffee.
Hey, um, I wanted to say thanks.
Part of the job, but you are welcome.
No.
No, I mean for the money.
What money? Sorry.
The loan.
The oneyou and ben gave me.
Sure.
Of course.
"The day had turned stormyin the kingdom far, far aw.
The fair princess was lost, and the sky was dark gray.
" This part's scary.
Can we go back to the beginning? It's okay.
Everything works out in the end.
I'm not so sureabout that.
I had an arctic cycloneblow my roof off once.
Not helping, jerome.
MaI.
Mai, I said I was sorry.
I'm sorry, too.
I'm sorryI don't have one tooth and a misshapen earlike gee wong.
Won agaiN.
Who's the champion? You're the champion.
That's right, I.
am.
the champion! You want a piece of this, boss? No, no, I'm good.
Fraidy cat.
I'm worried about marin.
I left a noteon her door.
She wasn't home yet? She went up accokeek earlier.
I thoughtshe would be here by now.
She's up on a mountain? See you,"fear of failure"! that was the last one.
Look at that.
Elmo's completely coveredin clouds.
You can't evensee the men anymore.
My problemsare so small.
That's a cyclone coming in.
Come on.
I thoughtit was heading west.
Yeah, it must haveturned on us.
Jack, nobody should be outin this.
Exactly.
Won again.
Who wants some of this? Your ladyis no shrinking violet when it comesto gamesmanship.
She's more likean exploding daisy.
Copy that.
I could playwith a blindfold on.
What's wrong? I lost! It'S.
just checkers.
I know.
I'm depressed.
I need my sad machine.
Keep your head down, all right.
Follow the trail.
Cash! Marin! "She knew there were breadcrumbs that marked her way, but nowshe couldn't find them.
" Will she be okay? She'll be okay.
Cash! Marin! Jack! Jack! Follow me! Cash was with me.
- Where? - I don't know! You can't stay out here! Well, I'm not leavingwithout him! Cash! See, baby, it's okay.
I know what wouldmake you feel better, matty.
A game of twister! You scare me.
I'll play, too, matty.
We can take her.
Bring it.
Three hours and counting.
Looks like we better starthanding out free burgers.
Well, why not? You're beingawfully generous these days.
What was that about? Sara told me about the loan we gave her.
It's just for a lawyer.
Her ex is trying totake custody of matty.
I don't carewhat it's for.
Then what? Look, I know I didn't make the kind of money that you madebefore we got married, but I thoughtwe were partners.
And partnersdiscuss things like loans before they happen.
Is this reallyabout us sharing our money, or is thisabout something else? If you're going give ourmoney to your ex-girlfriend, it would be niceif you told your wife.
Jack, I thinkthis is where I lost him.
Cash! We need to keep moving.
It's too dangerous.
Cash! - You're okay! - Yeah, you? Yeah, fine! I'm sorry I lost you.
Hey, we need to keep moving! This way downis better! No, it's north-facing!We need to go this way! I've livedon this mountain! Yeah, and at this rate, you're gonna die on it, too! Someone pick! Fine.
We'll go his way.
Left foot, yellow.
If you win, it's only because your arms are at least three timesas long as mine.
Spin! Right hand, blue.
Looks like I'm the winner! Numero uno! Numero uno! You pushed me.
Sore loser, party of one.
Annie, that's enough.
Enough? I'm not stopping now.
I'm on a roll! No onewants to play with you.
Yeah,'cause I'm beatingthe pants off of them! No, becauseyou're a mean, competitive -- rhymes with "mitch.
" Excuse me? I couldn't hold it in.
That was -- that was.
I'm laughing.
You made me laugh.
I brought your shoes.
I thought you saidyou loved everything about me.
Yes.
So, I get competitive.
That's who I am.
Okay, well, maybe some things we both may needto work on, like.
maybe notyelling at little boys.
In that case, I would like you to stop interrupting me and using the term "orifice"when you mean "office.
" But you always laughwhen I say,"I'll call youat your orifice.
" The first three timesyou said it, yes.
Okay.
That hurt.
Does this make younot want to marrme? What?No.
I want to marry youlike crazy.
I just don't want toplay checkers with you.
Ever.
Don't do that again.
- Yeah, but I thought you - - yeah, I lied.
Where's jack? He's right behind us.
Hey, jack.
You're an assfor going out there.
Thanks.
Hey, man, thanks for helping us out.
Yeah, you could havebeen killed out there.
Yeah, I know that.
Yeah, well, marin didn'T.
You did a lousy jobof protecting her.
That's ironiccoming from you, jack.
Now you don'twant to hurt her.
Maybe you shouldleave her alone.
Aren't youmarrying someone else? That has nothing to do with this.
Really? That's the reason she was upon that mountain to begin with.
If you want to blame someone, blame yourself.
Break it up! Calm down, jack.
Everything's okay.
It's all finE.
cash.
sorry i'm don't must man it And you, you wait right here.
Hey, there, folks.
I'd like you to share a little songI'm about to sing to my bride.
A serenade to my number one, if you will.
Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? Just like me they long to be close to you On the daythat you were born the angels -- What did he sayto make you do that? Uh, he said that I wasthe reason you were up there.
He's partly right.
I was trying to getsome closure to us, I guess.
On a mountain? It involved rocks.
Did you get closure? Why do you care, jack? It's, uh, hard for me, too, marin.
I know it's unfair of meto say that, but it's true.
We might not be together, but that doesn't mean that everything we hadinstantly gets wiped away.
I wish it could.
There was a lot there.
There was.
We're gonna be okay.
Yeah.
Thanks.
What, for punching him? For sayingit was real.
Storm's over! Sometimes, it's not until a storm comes that things get unearthed.
We get to see what's underneath.
The dark secrets and the truths that in the light of day we keep hidden.
for some, the truth will make them feel closer.
For others, it will make them more alone.
Hey, sara, take this for matty.
He seemed to like it.
But it's for the baby.
Um, I'm not sure I want herto believe in fairy tales.
Pain will get uprooted.
some pain still too deep to be seen by human eyes.
sickness But in time, as we replant ourselves, we will be thankful.
Because, like the roots of a tree, it is what lies beneath that allows us to grow.
together or apart.