The Baby-Sitters Club (2020) s02e01 Episode Script
Kristy and the Snobs
1
Looking in the mirror again and again ♪
Wishing the reflection
Would tell me something ♪
I can't get a hold of myself ♪
Summertime is the weirdest time.
When it's happening,
it feels like it'll last forever,
and then when it's over,
it feels like it never happened at all.
Except for this one,
because this was the summer
when everything changed.
My mom got married, and when my friends
and I got back to Stoneybrook from camp,
I had a new house, a new family.
Most of our stuff came with us,
but some things didn't.
It's hard to sleep without him.
I know.
Do you think he knew it was gonna happen
when they took him to the vet?
He was so sick, buddy.
And he was in a lot of pain.
He knew the vet would make it go away.
And he knew we really loved him.
David Michael had been like this
pretty much every day since our dog Louie,
well, you know.
His whole life, most of mine too,
Louie had been waiting at the door
for us to get home.
But now he was gone.
Come on. Let's go get some breakfast.
And home wasn't home anymore.
Not that Mom and Watson weren't trying.
Good morning, sleepyheads.
Welcome to the Thomas-Brewer
family breakfast buffet!
Why do they do this every weekend?
To make us feel more like a family.
It was all really nice,
but, to me,
family is when you can put your feet up
and eat dry cereal
out of the box with your hands.
This was not that,
no matter how much fruit salad
my mom made.
David Michael, you have got to taste
the pancakes that Watson made.
- They're his specialty.
- Yes, they are.
Hot off the griddle.
I got blueberry. I got banana.
I got raspberry chocolate chip.
And check this out,
little man, a D for David,
M for Michael,
and T for Thomas.
- Isn't that cute?
- Isn't that cute?
I can switch the T and the M.
For a proper monogram,
the T should be in the middle.
It's great, Watson. Thanks.
- You're so amazing.
- I love you.
David Michael hates pancakes,
but he doesn't want
to make Watson feel bad.
In the old days,
he'd slip whatever he didn't want
to Louie under the table.
Now I'm Louie.
Liz,
are you responsible for the cantaloupe?
Why, yes, sweetheart. I am.
Just so you know for the future,
I prefer them cut into wedges, not cubes.
Of course, some people don't
worry about feeling comfortable at all.
Take my older brothers, Charlie and Sam.
They've been "Brewers,"
and yes, those are quotation marks
you hear in my voice, for two months now,
and they act like they've had everything
from their pancakes to their underwear
monogrammed their whole lives.
Believe me, I am lucky to be here,
but that's the thing.
When you feel lucky, it's because
a part of you knows you don't belong.
I miss camp. I miss my friends. I miss
Stacey!
Hey! I was hoping I'd see you.
Duh. What are you doing here?
- Were you just in the neighborhood?
- Oh, Sam texted me.
Sam?
Yeah. He said some people were hanging,
and did I want to come.
Are you dating my brother now?
You know he's a sophomore, right?
We're friends who text.
So you you didn't come
to hang out with me at all?
I came hoping
to hang out with both of you.
Hey, Stacey.
I'm just gonna go say hi for one sec.
- Be back.
- Go say hi.
Sam!
Stacey just hugs boys now
apparently.
Hey, are you looking for someone?
My name is Amanda Delaney.
I live down the street.
I didn't know there were other kids
in the neighborhood. I'm Kristy.
I know who you are.
You're Mr. Brewer's new
- Whatever you are.
- Stepdaughter.
For your mother from mine.
I have no idea why.
Back on Bradford Court,
I would've told her what she could do
with her envelope, but now,
well, she looked like she belonged here,
and I knew I didn't.
I'll give it to her.
Thanks.
You know that's a bath towel, right?
What, were you born in a barn
or, like, New Jersey?
So I didn't know
there was more than one kind of towel,
or what was wrong with New Jersey.
Oh well. The summer was almost over,
and I was finally back where I belong.
This meeting of The Baby-Sitters Club
will come to order.
Claude, what is that?
Oh, it's a Fuji X-T10.
Ease of digital, look of film.
I just thought
I'd really document this year.
- Just keep talking and act natural.
- Oh.
Um, did you get that one on Etsy too?
B&H. I took her when she came to the city.
It's this really famous camera store
on 9th Avenue.
And they gave me a very good price.
- Great.
- Ooh, Dawn, you look super tan.
Three weeks in Southern California
where the sun shines as advertised.
I feel like a whole new person.
It was the best summer ever.
Ooh, can I see?
Well, summer's over now,
and The Baby-Sitters Club
is officially back in business.
We've all grown over this past year,
physically, personally,
and most importantly, in number.
So I would like to take this opportunity
to welcome our newest member
Hi! Sorry.
Jessi.
Class went late and Madame Noelle
is super strict about everyone staying
to the very end.
I really, really hate
people being late,
but I, too,
have experienced some personal growth.
I think.
It's okay. This time.
Baby-Sitters Club.
Dr. Johanssen!
We're glad to be back too.
Thursday night?
- Stacey.
- Stacey McGill will be your sitter.
- We'll see you then.
- That was like clockwork.
Smooth as silk. A well-oiled machine.
You guys are awesome.
Um, what are you guys wearing
for the first day of school?
Ooh, I have this amazing vintage blazer
that I bleach-dyed myself,
high-waisted pleather shorts,
and my purple Docs.
Sorry. I just have to break them in
a little bit before tonight.
Didn't you just come from ballet?
That was class. Tonight I have
rehearsals for the fall showcase.
Oh.
So, Miss Best Summer Ever,
is it going to be the best fall ever?
- What do you mean?
- You and Logan.
Things were getting
pretty serious at camp.
- I I mean
- They kissed.
Stop.
Thrice.
That means three, by the way.
So, are you guys, like,
fully boyfriend and girlfriend now?
I don't know.
We haven't talked since the end of camp.
Mary Anne!
It's only been three weeks.
That's like nothing. Plus, it's summer.
He said he was going
to his grandparents in Kentucky.
See, they probably
don't have cell reception there.
Yes, they do.
They absolutely have
cell reception in Kentucky.
If you wanna see if it's meant to be,
there's one foolproof way to know.
Stalk him on social media.
- No.
- No.
Compare your detailed astrological charts
to find out if your love
is truly written in the stars.
We'll figure out
the position of the planets
at the moment of both of your births
Or, get this, you could just text him
and tell him you miss him.
No.
- It's what you would do.
- Kristy.
I told you, Sam texted me!
Right.
Anastasia Elizabeth McGill,
Sam Thomas texted you
and you didn't tell me?
It's not that big a deal.
You're an Aries, right?
Okay. He invited me to hang out
by the pool at Watson's,
and I mostly hung out with Kristy.
But he's making an effort
to have some kind of social life
in his new neighborhood.
Unlike some people I know,
Kristin Amanda Thomas.
First of all,
Claudia broke out the full names, not me.
And second of all, I do have a social life
within my neighborhood.
- Hm.
- Who's that with?
I'm going over to
this girl Amanda Delaney's house
in a couple of days.
With my mother, for tea.
- For tea.
- Fancy. Okay.
It's just like Paddington.
It was not like Paddington.
For one thing, Paddington likes to eat.
And Paddington is friendly.
This is a beautiful home.
Hmm.
The architectural detail is lovely.
Is it the same upstairs?
Yes.
I am not sure I know how you met Watson.
Oh, it's really sweet, actually.
Yeah, um, he was looking for
new office space,
and I was the listing agent
on this converted warehouse development
in Stamford.
Oh, so you worked for him.
With him.
Well, as his Realtor.
I've always worked.
Um, that's how I support my four children.
They work themselves.
In fact, Kristy has
a very successful babysitting business.
- You have a business?
- It's also a club.
The Baby-Sitters Club.
That is wonderful. Hm.
Well, you all really won the lottery,
didn't you?
The nerve of that woman!
Making fun of my job? We won the lottery?
Who does she think she is?
I told you she seemed snobby.
Yeah, well, you're right.
And don't you worry,
we are never going there again.
I guess not all neighbors
can be Claudia and Mary Anne.
Good God!
Did she say real estate?
I mean, real estate.
Yes, that's what I do.
I'm a real estate agent. For God
Pick a card.
This will tell us
how he views you and your relationship.
- Hi.
- Okay, we're off.
Yeah, we'll bring you back dessert.
They do a carrot cake you could die for.
Uh-huh. Sorry, what's that?
The Magician,
symbolizing the inconstancy of life,
but also new opportunities.
Okay, just, you know, finish your homework
before you summon the Devil.
- Dad, you're so strict.
- Come on.
It's okay.
Next, star charts.
Yours is Virgo sun,
Virgo moon,
Virgo Rising.
Triple Virgo.
It's very rare.
What does it mean?
You're organized
and extremely detail-oriented.
We'll do his
and cross-reference it for compatibility.
- Okay.
- What's his birthday?
January 10th.
Capricorn. Great for you.
Place of birth?
- Uh, Kentucky?
- What city?
Exact time of birth?
- Give me your phone.
- No, Dawn! Don't call him.
Okay, I'm just getting his number.
Don't worry. Mine's blocked.
- It's ringing.
- I'm gonna throw up.
Hello?
Mr. Bruno,
this is Esperanza
Kensington
from the United States Census Bureau.
I'm calling about some missing data
from your form.
I don't think I filled out any forms.
Ah, well then,
I'm very glad I caught you, Mr. Bruno.
Answering the US Census is one of
our nation's most important civic duties.
I just need to confirm your date of birth.
January 10th, 2007.
- Place of birth?
- Born in Louisville, Kentucky.
Technically, we were living
in Bloomfield at the time.
- I'm not sure.
- Exact time of birth?
Logan, are you giving out
personal information again?
No, Mom.
While Mary Anne and Dawn were
looking to the spirit world for answers,
I was missing one spirit in particular.
Um
I didn't know where the bowls were.
Is it okay if I have some cereal?
Is it okay if you have some cereal?
Of course it's okay.
This is your house, Kristy.
You can Yes! Uh, here, let me help you.
Um, just so you know,
the bowls are right there.
- Okay.
- Would you grab us some milk?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Thank you.
It's better when it's a little soggy.
Okay, come over
to my little midnight-snack nook.
You know you can always talk to me, right?
Anytime you want.
Or not talk.
Yeah, I mean, we can we can not talk.
We can just hang out
in companionable silence
in the middle of the night.
- I'm gonna put this away.
- Oh, okay.
- Somewhere safe.
- Yeah.
Oh, Watson?
Thank you.
She acted like she was going to wipe down
the furniture the minute we left,
and she said
that my mom "won the lottery."
- Can you believe it?
- It's not great.
But maybe she meant
'cause Watson's such a nice guy.
Yeah, or maybe she's shy.
Some people think other people are snobby,
when in reality
they're just socially awkward.
Stop projecting yourself
onto Mrs. Delaney.
Also, it's Mrs. Delaney.
No first name. She made that very clear.
Well, Kristy, she is an adult.
Isn't that just respectful?
So how's the astrology going?
Compatibility inconclusive.
Without an exact time of birth,
it's about as unscientific
as a magazine horoscope.
Is it, Esperanza?
Okay. Time for Plan B.
A séance?
Men are visual creatures,
and I just got a fancy new camera.
OMG, photo shoot?
What're you gonna do? Take a picture
of Mary Anne and sneak it into his locker?
Instagram, the world's locker.
- I thought you hated social media.
- It's a means to an end.
- We'll make you an account.
- He'll slide into your DMs.
And then happily ever after.
Or you could just call him on the phone
like a normal human woman.
I can't do that.
He liked her in camp,
which was less than a month ago.
They were practically inseparable.
And now, all of a sudden,
he doesn't know she's alive
because she got on a bus?
And mic drop.
Hello, Baby-Sitters Club.
This is President Kristy Thomas speaking.
This is Mrs. Delaney.
I need a babysitter for Sunday afternoon.
Sunday afternoon? Hold, please.
Why, it's Stoneybrook Abbey's
very own Mrs. Delaney.
She needs a sitter for Amanda.
Wait, didn't you say she was my age?
Why does she need a sitter?
- The rich are different from you and me.
- Says the grocery store heiress.
One grocery store,
which was sold, like, 20 years ago.
And I try to be the change.
Kristy,
you're the only one free that afternoon.
No. Why?
Tell her I'm cleaning the gutters.
Or going to public school.
Or anything she thinks
is socially unacceptable.
We all go to public school.
Kristy, she's just a snob.
You're the professional one.
You got this.
I'll be your sitter. Thank you.
Good job.
Just so you know,
I don't need a babysitter.
Your mother seems to think otherwise.
Only because I, um,
got caught sneaking out
to see my boyfriend.
Don't you think
you're a little young for a boyfriend?
I'm gonna watch TV. Get me a Pellegrino.
So yeah, I was a professional.
She belonged here, I didn't.
But maybe I could get her on my own turf,
such as it was.
You know, I was going to see
if you wanted to come by my house
to hang out with my cute brother,
but you wouldn't be interested,
because you have a boyfriend.
- A little this way.
- Here, face this way.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
Yeah, put your arm up. Yes, give it to me.
Fun. Carefree. You're young.
You're in love, and you're in Paris.
I'm not in Paris.
- Sadly, none of us are.
- It's okay. I think we got one.
The sullenness kind of works
in a '90s British model kind of way.
We'll just slap a filter on it.
All ready, Stace?
Yep. "Sew Long Mary Anne"
is up and ready to go.
S-E-W. It's a pun
on the Leonard Cohen song
because you like to sew.
I like to knit.
It's adjacent.
And one "loganbrunoCT"
is already following you.
- Really? Okay, I'm sending.
- I'm posting.
Oh my God! He liked it!
DM coming through. It's working.
Okay. Let me see. Um
Does Logan Bruno breed teacup pigs
or is he a teacup pig?
Delete it.
- Now!
- Okay, okay, I am.
My friends had gotten
accidentally catfished by a teacup pig
with an oddly active
social media presence,
but my own IRL deception
was going exactly as planned.
Him?
I mean,
to the extent that I actually planned it.
I just said my cute brother.
I didn't say which one.
Hey, David Michael.
This is Amanda from down the street.
Hi, do you wanna watch a movie?
I could start this one over.
Is that a dog bed?
- Yeah, my dog Louie.
- Where is he?
He had cancer on his heart.
Why do you have his bed?
It still smells like him.
It helps me pretend that he's still here.
You're just like my mom.
She's obsessed with animals.
They're, like, her only friends.
I get that.
That's probably why she thinks she has to
hire people to hang out with me,
because she thinks I'm like her.
I didn't mean to eavesdrop.
Well, actually,
of course I meant to eavesdrop,
but I suddenly realized,
I'd never seen Amanda with any other kids.
No brothers, no sisters, no friends.
Do you like animals?
More than people sometimes.
Amanda might be a snob, but
she was also really lonely.
Kristy, I hear you had
Amanda Delaney over to play yesterday.
Amanda Delaney is a social climber,
but has no ability to speak to people.
- Hm.
- Okay.
Well, I played mixed doubles
with her mother this morning.
Figures.
And apparently
Amanda had a very good time.
She did?
She did. So much so
that her mom invited all of us
to a charity event
at their house tomorrow.
Seriously? I feel like
I'm being trolled by this woman.
What? Wh what does that mean?
Come on, a tea? A charity event?
The next thing you know
she's gonna tell me I'm prom queen
and dump a bucket
of pig's blood over my head.
- Why would she do that?
- She wouldn't. She wouldn't. It's a movie.
Honey, she's being friendly.
I already told her we'd go.
Without even asking me?
I had no reason to think
it would be a problem.
It'll be nice. You'll meet
more people from the neighborhood.
I don't need to meet any more people
from this neighborhood.
This lottery winner is staying home.
Okay?
Liz? Come on.
I'm sorry, guys. I'll be right back.
Liz?
Here's something
I read about lottery winners.
They win all this money,
then a year later, it's all gone.
Like it never happened.
- Daddy, is Liz coming?
- She'll see us later, buddy.
Because there's nothing like
getting everything you ever wanted
to make you feel like
you were never supposed to have it.
Check it out.
Is this the charity event?
Well,
it was supposed to be a surprise.
Daddy, may I go visit the rescue lizards?
Of course you can visit
the rescue lizards. Go!
- Oh, you made it.
- We made it. Hi.
- Hi, good to see you.
- You too.
Amanda told me about your Louie.
I'm so sorry.
I know that nothing can ever replace him,
but we do these adoption events
every couple of months
and I thought maybe
you could find a new friend here.
I thought maybe this one.
She came from a puppy mill
that got shut down.
She and her brothers were abandoned.
But she's so sweet,
and her fur
kind of reminds me of your hair.
Looks like she picked you, buddy.
Huh?
So what are you gonna name her?
You came.
What's your name?
Oh, uh, Shannon.
Let's call her Shannon.
Okay. Hi, Shannon.
So I guess we all learned
an important lesson that day,
which is that snobs love dogs too.
Kidding. I mean, the Delaneys
definitely were a little bit shallow
and had some weird interpersonal issues,
but there's more to people
than meets the eye.
I mean, we know this, but I actually
did learn something else that day.
Here, take her.
Which is that the best way to feel like
you belong is to start acting like you do.
Hey, Kristy.
Hey, buddy.
I'm really happy you could make it.
All of you.
Hey.
Okay.
- Nice suit.
- Oh.
What, are you tending to bees later?
My dad is a natural redhead.
He also thinks I'm allergic to the sun.
It's not funny!
- Yes, it is.
- I'll talk to him.
Me too, as a redhead.
Winter, spring, summer, fall ♪
A moment's fine
But I wanna feel them all ♪
Sometimes home
is right there where you left it,
and sometimes
- Mary Anne?
- No! I mean, yes!
I mean,
hi.
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
I called him.
you have to invite it in.
For a moment in the sun ♪
I don't need to be cool ♪
I'd trade it for a moment in the sun
With you ♪
Winter, spring, summer, fall ♪
A moment's fine
But I wanna feel them all ♪
I wanna feel them all ♪
Everything I've dreamed about
Is coming on ♪
Trade it for a moment in the sun ♪
All that other noise
Is just a waste of time ♪
You're the only music on my mind ♪
I don't need money
I don't need to be cool ♪
I'd trade it for a moment in the sun
With you ♪
With you ♪
With you ♪
With you ♪
Looking in the mirror again and again ♪
Wishing the reflection
Would tell me something ♪
I can't get a hold of myself ♪
Summertime is the weirdest time.
When it's happening,
it feels like it'll last forever,
and then when it's over,
it feels like it never happened at all.
Except for this one,
because this was the summer
when everything changed.
My mom got married, and when my friends
and I got back to Stoneybrook from camp,
I had a new house, a new family.
Most of our stuff came with us,
but some things didn't.
It's hard to sleep without him.
I know.
Do you think he knew it was gonna happen
when they took him to the vet?
He was so sick, buddy.
And he was in a lot of pain.
He knew the vet would make it go away.
And he knew we really loved him.
David Michael had been like this
pretty much every day since our dog Louie,
well, you know.
His whole life, most of mine too,
Louie had been waiting at the door
for us to get home.
But now he was gone.
Come on. Let's go get some breakfast.
And home wasn't home anymore.
Not that Mom and Watson weren't trying.
Good morning, sleepyheads.
Welcome to the Thomas-Brewer
family breakfast buffet!
Why do they do this every weekend?
To make us feel more like a family.
It was all really nice,
but, to me,
family is when you can put your feet up
and eat dry cereal
out of the box with your hands.
This was not that,
no matter how much fruit salad
my mom made.
David Michael, you have got to taste
the pancakes that Watson made.
- They're his specialty.
- Yes, they are.
Hot off the griddle.
I got blueberry. I got banana.
I got raspberry chocolate chip.
And check this out,
little man, a D for David,
M for Michael,
and T for Thomas.
- Isn't that cute?
- Isn't that cute?
I can switch the T and the M.
For a proper monogram,
the T should be in the middle.
It's great, Watson. Thanks.
- You're so amazing.
- I love you.
David Michael hates pancakes,
but he doesn't want
to make Watson feel bad.
In the old days,
he'd slip whatever he didn't want
to Louie under the table.
Now I'm Louie.
Liz,
are you responsible for the cantaloupe?
Why, yes, sweetheart. I am.
Just so you know for the future,
I prefer them cut into wedges, not cubes.
Of course, some people don't
worry about feeling comfortable at all.
Take my older brothers, Charlie and Sam.
They've been "Brewers,"
and yes, those are quotation marks
you hear in my voice, for two months now,
and they act like they've had everything
from their pancakes to their underwear
monogrammed their whole lives.
Believe me, I am lucky to be here,
but that's the thing.
When you feel lucky, it's because
a part of you knows you don't belong.
I miss camp. I miss my friends. I miss
Stacey!
Hey! I was hoping I'd see you.
Duh. What are you doing here?
- Were you just in the neighborhood?
- Oh, Sam texted me.
Sam?
Yeah. He said some people were hanging,
and did I want to come.
Are you dating my brother now?
You know he's a sophomore, right?
We're friends who text.
So you you didn't come
to hang out with me at all?
I came hoping
to hang out with both of you.
Hey, Stacey.
I'm just gonna go say hi for one sec.
- Be back.
- Go say hi.
Sam!
Stacey just hugs boys now
apparently.
Hey, are you looking for someone?
My name is Amanda Delaney.
I live down the street.
I didn't know there were other kids
in the neighborhood. I'm Kristy.
I know who you are.
You're Mr. Brewer's new
- Whatever you are.
- Stepdaughter.
For your mother from mine.
I have no idea why.
Back on Bradford Court,
I would've told her what she could do
with her envelope, but now,
well, she looked like she belonged here,
and I knew I didn't.
I'll give it to her.
Thanks.
You know that's a bath towel, right?
What, were you born in a barn
or, like, New Jersey?
So I didn't know
there was more than one kind of towel,
or what was wrong with New Jersey.
Oh well. The summer was almost over,
and I was finally back where I belong.
This meeting of The Baby-Sitters Club
will come to order.
Claude, what is that?
Oh, it's a Fuji X-T10.
Ease of digital, look of film.
I just thought
I'd really document this year.
- Just keep talking and act natural.
- Oh.
Um, did you get that one on Etsy too?
B&H. I took her when she came to the city.
It's this really famous camera store
on 9th Avenue.
And they gave me a very good price.
- Great.
- Ooh, Dawn, you look super tan.
Three weeks in Southern California
where the sun shines as advertised.
I feel like a whole new person.
It was the best summer ever.
Ooh, can I see?
Well, summer's over now,
and The Baby-Sitters Club
is officially back in business.
We've all grown over this past year,
physically, personally,
and most importantly, in number.
So I would like to take this opportunity
to welcome our newest member
Hi! Sorry.
Jessi.
Class went late and Madame Noelle
is super strict about everyone staying
to the very end.
I really, really hate
people being late,
but I, too,
have experienced some personal growth.
I think.
It's okay. This time.
Baby-Sitters Club.
Dr. Johanssen!
We're glad to be back too.
Thursday night?
- Stacey.
- Stacey McGill will be your sitter.
- We'll see you then.
- That was like clockwork.
Smooth as silk. A well-oiled machine.
You guys are awesome.
Um, what are you guys wearing
for the first day of school?
Ooh, I have this amazing vintage blazer
that I bleach-dyed myself,
high-waisted pleather shorts,
and my purple Docs.
Sorry. I just have to break them in
a little bit before tonight.
Didn't you just come from ballet?
That was class. Tonight I have
rehearsals for the fall showcase.
Oh.
So, Miss Best Summer Ever,
is it going to be the best fall ever?
- What do you mean?
- You and Logan.
Things were getting
pretty serious at camp.
- I I mean
- They kissed.
Stop.
Thrice.
That means three, by the way.
So, are you guys, like,
fully boyfriend and girlfriend now?
I don't know.
We haven't talked since the end of camp.
Mary Anne!
It's only been three weeks.
That's like nothing. Plus, it's summer.
He said he was going
to his grandparents in Kentucky.
See, they probably
don't have cell reception there.
Yes, they do.
They absolutely have
cell reception in Kentucky.
If you wanna see if it's meant to be,
there's one foolproof way to know.
Stalk him on social media.
- No.
- No.
Compare your detailed astrological charts
to find out if your love
is truly written in the stars.
We'll figure out
the position of the planets
at the moment of both of your births
Or, get this, you could just text him
and tell him you miss him.
No.
- It's what you would do.
- Kristy.
I told you, Sam texted me!
Right.
Anastasia Elizabeth McGill,
Sam Thomas texted you
and you didn't tell me?
It's not that big a deal.
You're an Aries, right?
Okay. He invited me to hang out
by the pool at Watson's,
and I mostly hung out with Kristy.
But he's making an effort
to have some kind of social life
in his new neighborhood.
Unlike some people I know,
Kristin Amanda Thomas.
First of all,
Claudia broke out the full names, not me.
And second of all, I do have a social life
within my neighborhood.
- Hm.
- Who's that with?
I'm going over to
this girl Amanda Delaney's house
in a couple of days.
With my mother, for tea.
- For tea.
- Fancy. Okay.
It's just like Paddington.
It was not like Paddington.
For one thing, Paddington likes to eat.
And Paddington is friendly.
This is a beautiful home.
Hmm.
The architectural detail is lovely.
Is it the same upstairs?
Yes.
I am not sure I know how you met Watson.
Oh, it's really sweet, actually.
Yeah, um, he was looking for
new office space,
and I was the listing agent
on this converted warehouse development
in Stamford.
Oh, so you worked for him.
With him.
Well, as his Realtor.
I've always worked.
Um, that's how I support my four children.
They work themselves.
In fact, Kristy has
a very successful babysitting business.
- You have a business?
- It's also a club.
The Baby-Sitters Club.
That is wonderful. Hm.
Well, you all really won the lottery,
didn't you?
The nerve of that woman!
Making fun of my job? We won the lottery?
Who does she think she is?
I told you she seemed snobby.
Yeah, well, you're right.
And don't you worry,
we are never going there again.
I guess not all neighbors
can be Claudia and Mary Anne.
Good God!
Did she say real estate?
I mean, real estate.
Yes, that's what I do.
I'm a real estate agent. For God
Pick a card.
This will tell us
how he views you and your relationship.
- Hi.
- Okay, we're off.
Yeah, we'll bring you back dessert.
They do a carrot cake you could die for.
Uh-huh. Sorry, what's that?
The Magician,
symbolizing the inconstancy of life,
but also new opportunities.
Okay, just, you know, finish your homework
before you summon the Devil.
- Dad, you're so strict.
- Come on.
It's okay.
Next, star charts.
Yours is Virgo sun,
Virgo moon,
Virgo Rising.
Triple Virgo.
It's very rare.
What does it mean?
You're organized
and extremely detail-oriented.
We'll do his
and cross-reference it for compatibility.
- Okay.
- What's his birthday?
January 10th.
Capricorn. Great for you.
Place of birth?
- Uh, Kentucky?
- What city?
Exact time of birth?
- Give me your phone.
- No, Dawn! Don't call him.
Okay, I'm just getting his number.
Don't worry. Mine's blocked.
- It's ringing.
- I'm gonna throw up.
Hello?
Mr. Bruno,
this is Esperanza
Kensington
from the United States Census Bureau.
I'm calling about some missing data
from your form.
I don't think I filled out any forms.
Ah, well then,
I'm very glad I caught you, Mr. Bruno.
Answering the US Census is one of
our nation's most important civic duties.
I just need to confirm your date of birth.
January 10th, 2007.
- Place of birth?
- Born in Louisville, Kentucky.
Technically, we were living
in Bloomfield at the time.
- I'm not sure.
- Exact time of birth?
Logan, are you giving out
personal information again?
No, Mom.
While Mary Anne and Dawn were
looking to the spirit world for answers,
I was missing one spirit in particular.
Um
I didn't know where the bowls were.
Is it okay if I have some cereal?
Is it okay if you have some cereal?
Of course it's okay.
This is your house, Kristy.
You can Yes! Uh, here, let me help you.
Um, just so you know,
the bowls are right there.
- Okay.
- Would you grab us some milk?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Thank you.
It's better when it's a little soggy.
Okay, come over
to my little midnight-snack nook.
You know you can always talk to me, right?
Anytime you want.
Or not talk.
Yeah, I mean, we can we can not talk.
We can just hang out
in companionable silence
in the middle of the night.
- I'm gonna put this away.
- Oh, okay.
- Somewhere safe.
- Yeah.
Oh, Watson?
Thank you.
She acted like she was going to wipe down
the furniture the minute we left,
and she said
that my mom "won the lottery."
- Can you believe it?
- It's not great.
But maybe she meant
'cause Watson's such a nice guy.
Yeah, or maybe she's shy.
Some people think other people are snobby,
when in reality
they're just socially awkward.
Stop projecting yourself
onto Mrs. Delaney.
Also, it's Mrs. Delaney.
No first name. She made that very clear.
Well, Kristy, she is an adult.
Isn't that just respectful?
So how's the astrology going?
Compatibility inconclusive.
Without an exact time of birth,
it's about as unscientific
as a magazine horoscope.
Is it, Esperanza?
Okay. Time for Plan B.
A séance?
Men are visual creatures,
and I just got a fancy new camera.
OMG, photo shoot?
What're you gonna do? Take a picture
of Mary Anne and sneak it into his locker?
Instagram, the world's locker.
- I thought you hated social media.
- It's a means to an end.
- We'll make you an account.
- He'll slide into your DMs.
And then happily ever after.
Or you could just call him on the phone
like a normal human woman.
I can't do that.
He liked her in camp,
which was less than a month ago.
They were practically inseparable.
And now, all of a sudden,
he doesn't know she's alive
because she got on a bus?
And mic drop.
Hello, Baby-Sitters Club.
This is President Kristy Thomas speaking.
This is Mrs. Delaney.
I need a babysitter for Sunday afternoon.
Sunday afternoon? Hold, please.
Why, it's Stoneybrook Abbey's
very own Mrs. Delaney.
She needs a sitter for Amanda.
Wait, didn't you say she was my age?
Why does she need a sitter?
- The rich are different from you and me.
- Says the grocery store heiress.
One grocery store,
which was sold, like, 20 years ago.
And I try to be the change.
Kristy,
you're the only one free that afternoon.
No. Why?
Tell her I'm cleaning the gutters.
Or going to public school.
Or anything she thinks
is socially unacceptable.
We all go to public school.
Kristy, she's just a snob.
You're the professional one.
You got this.
I'll be your sitter. Thank you.
Good job.
Just so you know,
I don't need a babysitter.
Your mother seems to think otherwise.
Only because I, um,
got caught sneaking out
to see my boyfriend.
Don't you think
you're a little young for a boyfriend?
I'm gonna watch TV. Get me a Pellegrino.
So yeah, I was a professional.
She belonged here, I didn't.
But maybe I could get her on my own turf,
such as it was.
You know, I was going to see
if you wanted to come by my house
to hang out with my cute brother,
but you wouldn't be interested,
because you have a boyfriend.
- A little this way.
- Here, face this way.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
Yeah, put your arm up. Yes, give it to me.
Fun. Carefree. You're young.
You're in love, and you're in Paris.
I'm not in Paris.
- Sadly, none of us are.
- It's okay. I think we got one.
The sullenness kind of works
in a '90s British model kind of way.
We'll just slap a filter on it.
All ready, Stace?
Yep. "Sew Long Mary Anne"
is up and ready to go.
S-E-W. It's a pun
on the Leonard Cohen song
because you like to sew.
I like to knit.
It's adjacent.
And one "loganbrunoCT"
is already following you.
- Really? Okay, I'm sending.
- I'm posting.
Oh my God! He liked it!
DM coming through. It's working.
Okay. Let me see. Um
Does Logan Bruno breed teacup pigs
or is he a teacup pig?
Delete it.
- Now!
- Okay, okay, I am.
My friends had gotten
accidentally catfished by a teacup pig
with an oddly active
social media presence,
but my own IRL deception
was going exactly as planned.
Him?
I mean,
to the extent that I actually planned it.
I just said my cute brother.
I didn't say which one.
Hey, David Michael.
This is Amanda from down the street.
Hi, do you wanna watch a movie?
I could start this one over.
Is that a dog bed?
- Yeah, my dog Louie.
- Where is he?
He had cancer on his heart.
Why do you have his bed?
It still smells like him.
It helps me pretend that he's still here.
You're just like my mom.
She's obsessed with animals.
They're, like, her only friends.
I get that.
That's probably why she thinks she has to
hire people to hang out with me,
because she thinks I'm like her.
I didn't mean to eavesdrop.
Well, actually,
of course I meant to eavesdrop,
but I suddenly realized,
I'd never seen Amanda with any other kids.
No brothers, no sisters, no friends.
Do you like animals?
More than people sometimes.
Amanda might be a snob, but
she was also really lonely.
Kristy, I hear you had
Amanda Delaney over to play yesterday.
Amanda Delaney is a social climber,
but has no ability to speak to people.
- Hm.
- Okay.
Well, I played mixed doubles
with her mother this morning.
Figures.
And apparently
Amanda had a very good time.
She did?
She did. So much so
that her mom invited all of us
to a charity event
at their house tomorrow.
Seriously? I feel like
I'm being trolled by this woman.
What? Wh what does that mean?
Come on, a tea? A charity event?
The next thing you know
she's gonna tell me I'm prom queen
and dump a bucket
of pig's blood over my head.
- Why would she do that?
- She wouldn't. She wouldn't. It's a movie.
Honey, she's being friendly.
I already told her we'd go.
Without even asking me?
I had no reason to think
it would be a problem.
It'll be nice. You'll meet
more people from the neighborhood.
I don't need to meet any more people
from this neighborhood.
This lottery winner is staying home.
Okay?
Liz? Come on.
I'm sorry, guys. I'll be right back.
Liz?
Here's something
I read about lottery winners.
They win all this money,
then a year later, it's all gone.
Like it never happened.
- Daddy, is Liz coming?
- She'll see us later, buddy.
Because there's nothing like
getting everything you ever wanted
to make you feel like
you were never supposed to have it.
Check it out.
Is this the charity event?
Well,
it was supposed to be a surprise.
Daddy, may I go visit the rescue lizards?
Of course you can visit
the rescue lizards. Go!
- Oh, you made it.
- We made it. Hi.
- Hi, good to see you.
- You too.
Amanda told me about your Louie.
I'm so sorry.
I know that nothing can ever replace him,
but we do these adoption events
every couple of months
and I thought maybe
you could find a new friend here.
I thought maybe this one.
She came from a puppy mill
that got shut down.
She and her brothers were abandoned.
But she's so sweet,
and her fur
kind of reminds me of your hair.
Looks like she picked you, buddy.
Huh?
So what are you gonna name her?
You came.
What's your name?
Oh, uh, Shannon.
Let's call her Shannon.
Okay. Hi, Shannon.
So I guess we all learned
an important lesson that day,
which is that snobs love dogs too.
Kidding. I mean, the Delaneys
definitely were a little bit shallow
and had some weird interpersonal issues,
but there's more to people
than meets the eye.
I mean, we know this, but I actually
did learn something else that day.
Here, take her.
Which is that the best way to feel like
you belong is to start acting like you do.
Hey, Kristy.
Hey, buddy.
I'm really happy you could make it.
All of you.
Hey.
Okay.
- Nice suit.
- Oh.
What, are you tending to bees later?
My dad is a natural redhead.
He also thinks I'm allergic to the sun.
It's not funny!
- Yes, it is.
- I'll talk to him.
Me too, as a redhead.
Winter, spring, summer, fall ♪
A moment's fine
But I wanna feel them all ♪
Sometimes home
is right there where you left it,
and sometimes
- Mary Anne?
- No! I mean, yes!
I mean,
hi.
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
I called him.
you have to invite it in.
For a moment in the sun ♪
I don't need to be cool ♪
I'd trade it for a moment in the sun
With you ♪
Winter, spring, summer, fall ♪
A moment's fine
But I wanna feel them all ♪
I wanna feel them all ♪
Everything I've dreamed about
Is coming on ♪
Trade it for a moment in the sun ♪
All that other noise
Is just a waste of time ♪
You're the only music on my mind ♪
I don't need money
I don't need to be cool ♪
I'd trade it for a moment in the sun
With you ♪
With you ♪
With you ♪
With you ♪