X-Men (1992) s02e01 Episode Script
Till Death Do Us Part (1)
NARRATOR: Previously on X-MEN You will remove Senator Kelly's brain and replace it with a computer.
What? You can't do that! I'm a United States senator.
(SCEAMS) Senator Kelly must be rescued.
If we fail, there will be a civil war.
This whole mine is gonna go up! Get Kelly above ground! I'm going after Wolverine and Gambit.
(WOLVERINE GRUNTS) (WOLVERINE GROANS) CYCLOPS: I'm not leaving anyone behind, not this time.
You coming, or is this your day off? KELLY ON MICROPHONE: I know from my own experience that mutant powers can be dangerous.
But we must not forget that mutants are human beings.
-Jean, I've been wondering -Yes? I've been wondering, will you marry me? Cyclops! (MR.
SINISTER LAUGHING EVILLY) WOLVERINE: (ECHOING) Cyclops! (GRUNTS) -You're mine.
-You want to bet? (GRUNTING) (WOLVERINE GRUNTS) Do you, Scott Summers, take this woman -to be your lawfully wedded wife? -I do.
You can't have her! (YELLS) (GROWLING) Do you, Jean Grey, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? I do.
(GRUNTING) (GRUNTS) (SIGHS) I'm beginning to feel much better now.
(GROANS) (PANTING) (WOLVERINE GROANS) (GROWLING) (WOLVERINE GROANS) -(WEAKLY) Jean.
-Wolverine? Where I come from, we always kiss the bride.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) We always kiss the bridesmaids, too.
This ain't Cajun country, hon.
Zip those lips.
Congratulations, Scott, and good luck.
Aren't you coming to the reception, Reverend? If only I could.
But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.
Pleasant dreams.
I wish everyone could be as happy as I am.
Promises to keep Promises to keep, my friend.
(LAUGHING) ON TV: I, Robert Jefferson Kelly, do solemnly swear that I will defend the Constitution of the United States of America, and that I will faithfully execute the duties of the Office of the President.
-Are you ready? -No fair flying, Rogue.
Gal, you're too young to be catching bouquets, anyway.
Here it comes! -CYCLOPS: Beast! -If you're going to be the next to marry, perhaps we should start calling you Mr.
McCoy.
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
" (SNIFFING) (SIGHS) So, Beast, what news do you have from our new president? The rosiest imaginable.
As senator, he arranged my bail.
As president, he cleared my name.
And I'd like to announce that my first act as president has been to issue a full pardon to Dr.
Henry McCoy, a mutant.
Recent events have convinced me that mutants must not be excluded from our society.
-We must act affirmatively -(WHISPERING) Now! to bring mutants into the mainstream.
(GROWLING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Stop this! I'm trying to help! (GRUNTS) You were elected to protect us from mutants! (GRUNTING) CREED: Mutant lovers! (GROWLING) (WHISPERING) This is Creed.
Stage 1 successful.
Begin Stage 2.
(GRUNTING) I must've hit my head or something.
These holograms are starting to smell good.
-JEAN: Wolverine? -Jean.
-We missed you at the wedding.
-I I must've lost track of time.
I'm sorry I couldn't be there.
-Jean, I still -I have to go.
Scott and I We have to catch a plane.
MORPH: No! He's my friend! They were all my friends.
I don't want to hurt them.
(SCREAMS) But why did they abandon me? Why did they leave me to die? Didn't I tell you? Clear sailing all the way.
Hey, Tin Woodsman! I'm sending you back to Oz in pieces.
Wolverine! Pull back! (GROANS) Why did they abandon me? Why did they leave me to die? MR.
SINISTER: You'll destroy them all.
I'll destroy them all.
All the X-Men! Cyclops.
Storm.
Wolverine! (GROANING) (SCREAMING) What's making me do this? (GROANING) Why? MAN 1: Come on, let's get the mutant! MAN 2: Yeah, get that lousy mutant! MAN 3: We'll show him! Please, don't hurt me! I'm just an ordinary mutant! I don't have any special powers.
I just look different! -No more mutants! No more mutants! -No more mutants! No more mutants.
(PANTING) Let me emphasize that we do not know who or what has triggered this outbreak of anti-mutant violence.
The demonstrators claim to be defending themselves against mutant attacks.
I don't understand, Professor.
Why has it gotten worse? When we saved President Kelly's life last year, he learned that not all mutants were evil.
Now his followers feel betrayed.
So often in our history, unhappy, misguided people have created scapegoats, blaming those that are different for the problems in their own lives.
It is an evil in men's hearts that must be fought.
If we stand up to the troublemakers, they will give up their cruel designs.
If we fail, their intolerance will grow, and many could perish.
(BEEPING) The private video line.
Please, excuse me.
Terrible violence.
(GROANING) What? Xavier! Please, hurry! (GROANING) Magneto! What is happening? Meet me at these coordinates.
Hurry! That's in Antarctica! Please! Hurry! I cannot last.
Magneto! Bon voyage.
(LAUGHING) Look like you scratch again, Wolverine.
This regrettable civic upheaval has distracted you, my friend.
-Perhaps we should call it a night.
-I'm fine.
Play pool, Cajun.
Hey! I saw you on TV! The President was talking about you! -Yes, very true.
-You know the President? Famous Beast will now have many admirers, no? -Do not break their hearts, mon ami! -I hardly think -I bet you know the President! -They're like brothers, petite! Yeah.
I noticed a resemblance.
-What? -MAN 1: Mutant lover! MAN 2: Send out the muties or we'll burn them out! -No more mutants! -No more mutants! (MAN EXCLAIMS) MAN: Look out! -Hey! -Perhaps you are unaware that this is a dangerous weapon.
Now! Over there! The mutant has a gun! Stay on him! (YELLING) (GRUNTING) I hear you don't like mutants.
Well, we don't much like you.
(SCREAMING) (SCREAMS) MAN: Let's get out of here! (ALL EXCLAIMING) Let's take these sardines out of the can! (ALL EXCLAIMING) A colorful metaphor, Wolverine.
I'm blue-green with envy.
(ALL SHOUTING) (BOTH MEN GRUNTING) Don't y'all leave now! The fun just starting! (SIREN WAILING) Might we not profit from their example and depart? A crime scene is no place for a recent recipient of a presidential pardon.
Yeah, I bet I got some unpaid parking tickets.
-Stay on him! -Come on, gumbo! I apologize for my abrupt departure.
I have been called away on a personal matter of the greatest importance.
Until Cyclops returns from his honeymoon, Storm will be in charge.
Hmm.
"Personal", huh? The Professor's getting mighty mysterious these days.
Hey! Check the news! And the President had no comment tonight about the presence of mutant Henry McCoy at a near-riot.
McCoy is seen here wielding an energy weapon -and attacking an occupied vehicle.
-We've been set up! Wolverine, if there is indeed a new conspiracy to turn the public against mutants, we must work to unmask it, not add to the climate of violence.
Climates are your department, Storm.
Unmasking is mine.
(CHUCKLING) (JEEP ENGINE GRINDING) Even Wolverine's jeep sounds angry.
Let's see if I can upset everybody else.
(LAUGHING) Making copies.
(YAWNING) -What are you doing back? -I forgot something.
Well, don't slam the door on your way out.
I haven't had a break since this mess started.
I'm going to grab forty winks in the rec room.
Don't worry, Rogue.
I'll be as quiet as a corpse.
-Pick a card, petite.
I show you a trick.
-Get real, Gambit.
Things are getting crazy tonight and you're playing games.
Anyway, card tricks are for kids.
ROGUE: You are a kid, hon.
Now run along and play while I talk to Gambit.
I happen to be watching the news.
NEWSMAN ON TV: mysterious illness which is sweeping the country Citizens to cooperate Do what she said, petite.
(IMITATING ROGUE) "Run along and play!" (GRUNTS ANGRILY) Ooh! I hate them! Oops! You got something to say to me, chère? What if I'd been lying about not being able to touch another human being? -What if I could, if I wanted to? -What's this supposed to mean to me? Come up to the rec room in five minutes and I'll show you.
If they're going to treat me like a kid, they could at least keep some junk food -in the house.
-Jubilee, we have information that a violent anti-mutant attack is expected at the mutant halfway house.
What can I do? Go and report back what you find.
Here's the address.
-I know I can count on you.
-Thanks, Storm! I'm glad someone around here thinks I'm not just a little kid.
That's for thinking you could take my place.
Look like I keep you waiting too long.
Or maybe you just want me to wake you up with a kiss.
(GAMBIT GROANING) What in the world? Spooky place.
Well, as long as I can help.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Hi! You needed some help protecting mutants? Why, yes! Won't you come in? NEWSWOMAN ON TV: There are new reports of anti-mutant unrest as a night of violence continues across America.
ROGUE: You can't say I didn't warn him! What happened, Rogue? The blamed fool kissed me and I absorbed all his powers.
Serves him right.
But the worst thing is, this keeps happening! Gambit, you could not have chosen a worse time to be a fool.
Jubilee? Jubilee? Could Jubilee have left without telling us? Something screwy's going on around here.
Where's Beast? I think he's in the Danger Room.
You and Rogue fly on ahead, and I shall meet you at the site of the disturbance.
Very well, Beast.
(CHUCKLING) How about a truly beastly workout? (LAUGHING) This seems a bit excessive.
Oh, dear.
MAN: Come on, blow up that mutant center! Y'all want to play catch? Get the mutants! (ALL EXCLAIMING) I summon torrential rains! (GRUNTING) Rogue! (MEN SHOUTING) Y'all hold this up for me.
You sure you can handle this bunch alone? Beast will soon be here to assist me.
Go! I'm out of here.
(POLICE SIREN WAILING) The arctic cold will cool their ardor! (ALL EXCLAIMING) -Do something! Make them pay! -Hey! Look out! If you want something done right -Fire on that mutant.
Full energy! -But, Captain I said fire! (GROANING) (GROANING) (CHUCKLING) (STORM GROANING) Enjoy your revenge, Morph.
I know I am.
What? You can't do that! I'm a United States senator.
(SCEAMS) Senator Kelly must be rescued.
If we fail, there will be a civil war.
This whole mine is gonna go up! Get Kelly above ground! I'm going after Wolverine and Gambit.
(WOLVERINE GRUNTS) (WOLVERINE GROANS) CYCLOPS: I'm not leaving anyone behind, not this time.
You coming, or is this your day off? KELLY ON MICROPHONE: I know from my own experience that mutant powers can be dangerous.
But we must not forget that mutants are human beings.
-Jean, I've been wondering -Yes? I've been wondering, will you marry me? Cyclops! (MR.
SINISTER LAUGHING EVILLY) WOLVERINE: (ECHOING) Cyclops! (GRUNTS) -You're mine.
-You want to bet? (GRUNTING) (WOLVERINE GRUNTS) Do you, Scott Summers, take this woman -to be your lawfully wedded wife? -I do.
You can't have her! (YELLS) (GROWLING) Do you, Jean Grey, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? I do.
(GRUNTING) (GRUNTS) (SIGHS) I'm beginning to feel much better now.
(GROANS) (PANTING) (WOLVERINE GROANS) (GROWLING) (WOLVERINE GROANS) -(WEAKLY) Jean.
-Wolverine? Where I come from, we always kiss the bride.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) We always kiss the bridesmaids, too.
This ain't Cajun country, hon.
Zip those lips.
Congratulations, Scott, and good luck.
Aren't you coming to the reception, Reverend? If only I could.
But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.
Pleasant dreams.
I wish everyone could be as happy as I am.
Promises to keep Promises to keep, my friend.
(LAUGHING) ON TV: I, Robert Jefferson Kelly, do solemnly swear that I will defend the Constitution of the United States of America, and that I will faithfully execute the duties of the Office of the President.
-Are you ready? -No fair flying, Rogue.
Gal, you're too young to be catching bouquets, anyway.
Here it comes! -CYCLOPS: Beast! -If you're going to be the next to marry, perhaps we should start calling you Mr.
McCoy.
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
" (SNIFFING) (SIGHS) So, Beast, what news do you have from our new president? The rosiest imaginable.
As senator, he arranged my bail.
As president, he cleared my name.
And I'd like to announce that my first act as president has been to issue a full pardon to Dr.
Henry McCoy, a mutant.
Recent events have convinced me that mutants must not be excluded from our society.
-We must act affirmatively -(WHISPERING) Now! to bring mutants into the mainstream.
(GROWLING) (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Stop this! I'm trying to help! (GRUNTS) You were elected to protect us from mutants! (GRUNTING) CREED: Mutant lovers! (GROWLING) (WHISPERING) This is Creed.
Stage 1 successful.
Begin Stage 2.
(GRUNTING) I must've hit my head or something.
These holograms are starting to smell good.
-JEAN: Wolverine? -Jean.
-We missed you at the wedding.
-I I must've lost track of time.
I'm sorry I couldn't be there.
-Jean, I still -I have to go.
Scott and I We have to catch a plane.
MORPH: No! He's my friend! They were all my friends.
I don't want to hurt them.
(SCREAMS) But why did they abandon me? Why did they leave me to die? Didn't I tell you? Clear sailing all the way.
Hey, Tin Woodsman! I'm sending you back to Oz in pieces.
Wolverine! Pull back! (GROANS) Why did they abandon me? Why did they leave me to die? MR.
SINISTER: You'll destroy them all.
I'll destroy them all.
All the X-Men! Cyclops.
Storm.
Wolverine! (GROANING) (SCREAMING) What's making me do this? (GROANING) Why? MAN 1: Come on, let's get the mutant! MAN 2: Yeah, get that lousy mutant! MAN 3: We'll show him! Please, don't hurt me! I'm just an ordinary mutant! I don't have any special powers.
I just look different! -No more mutants! No more mutants! -No more mutants! No more mutants.
(PANTING) Let me emphasize that we do not know who or what has triggered this outbreak of anti-mutant violence.
The demonstrators claim to be defending themselves against mutant attacks.
I don't understand, Professor.
Why has it gotten worse? When we saved President Kelly's life last year, he learned that not all mutants were evil.
Now his followers feel betrayed.
So often in our history, unhappy, misguided people have created scapegoats, blaming those that are different for the problems in their own lives.
It is an evil in men's hearts that must be fought.
If we stand up to the troublemakers, they will give up their cruel designs.
If we fail, their intolerance will grow, and many could perish.
(BEEPING) The private video line.
Please, excuse me.
Terrible violence.
(GROANING) What? Xavier! Please, hurry! (GROANING) Magneto! What is happening? Meet me at these coordinates.
Hurry! That's in Antarctica! Please! Hurry! I cannot last.
Magneto! Bon voyage.
(LAUGHING) Look like you scratch again, Wolverine.
This regrettable civic upheaval has distracted you, my friend.
-Perhaps we should call it a night.
-I'm fine.
Play pool, Cajun.
Hey! I saw you on TV! The President was talking about you! -Yes, very true.
-You know the President? Famous Beast will now have many admirers, no? -Do not break their hearts, mon ami! -I hardly think -I bet you know the President! -They're like brothers, petite! Yeah.
I noticed a resemblance.
-What? -MAN 1: Mutant lover! MAN 2: Send out the muties or we'll burn them out! -No more mutants! -No more mutants! (MAN EXCLAIMS) MAN: Look out! -Hey! -Perhaps you are unaware that this is a dangerous weapon.
Now! Over there! The mutant has a gun! Stay on him! (YELLING) (GRUNTING) I hear you don't like mutants.
Well, we don't much like you.
(SCREAMING) (SCREAMS) MAN: Let's get out of here! (ALL EXCLAIMING) Let's take these sardines out of the can! (ALL EXCLAIMING) A colorful metaphor, Wolverine.
I'm blue-green with envy.
(ALL SHOUTING) (BOTH MEN GRUNTING) Don't y'all leave now! The fun just starting! (SIREN WAILING) Might we not profit from their example and depart? A crime scene is no place for a recent recipient of a presidential pardon.
Yeah, I bet I got some unpaid parking tickets.
-Stay on him! -Come on, gumbo! I apologize for my abrupt departure.
I have been called away on a personal matter of the greatest importance.
Until Cyclops returns from his honeymoon, Storm will be in charge.
Hmm.
"Personal", huh? The Professor's getting mighty mysterious these days.
Hey! Check the news! And the President had no comment tonight about the presence of mutant Henry McCoy at a near-riot.
McCoy is seen here wielding an energy weapon -and attacking an occupied vehicle.
-We've been set up! Wolverine, if there is indeed a new conspiracy to turn the public against mutants, we must work to unmask it, not add to the climate of violence.
Climates are your department, Storm.
Unmasking is mine.
(CHUCKLING) (JEEP ENGINE GRINDING) Even Wolverine's jeep sounds angry.
Let's see if I can upset everybody else.
(LAUGHING) Making copies.
(YAWNING) -What are you doing back? -I forgot something.
Well, don't slam the door on your way out.
I haven't had a break since this mess started.
I'm going to grab forty winks in the rec room.
Don't worry, Rogue.
I'll be as quiet as a corpse.
-Pick a card, petite.
I show you a trick.
-Get real, Gambit.
Things are getting crazy tonight and you're playing games.
Anyway, card tricks are for kids.
ROGUE: You are a kid, hon.
Now run along and play while I talk to Gambit.
I happen to be watching the news.
NEWSMAN ON TV: mysterious illness which is sweeping the country Citizens to cooperate Do what she said, petite.
(IMITATING ROGUE) "Run along and play!" (GRUNTS ANGRILY) Ooh! I hate them! Oops! You got something to say to me, chère? What if I'd been lying about not being able to touch another human being? -What if I could, if I wanted to? -What's this supposed to mean to me? Come up to the rec room in five minutes and I'll show you.
If they're going to treat me like a kid, they could at least keep some junk food -in the house.
-Jubilee, we have information that a violent anti-mutant attack is expected at the mutant halfway house.
What can I do? Go and report back what you find.
Here's the address.
-I know I can count on you.
-Thanks, Storm! I'm glad someone around here thinks I'm not just a little kid.
That's for thinking you could take my place.
Look like I keep you waiting too long.
Or maybe you just want me to wake you up with a kiss.
(GAMBIT GROANING) What in the world? Spooky place.
Well, as long as I can help.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Hi! You needed some help protecting mutants? Why, yes! Won't you come in? NEWSWOMAN ON TV: There are new reports of anti-mutant unrest as a night of violence continues across America.
ROGUE: You can't say I didn't warn him! What happened, Rogue? The blamed fool kissed me and I absorbed all his powers.
Serves him right.
But the worst thing is, this keeps happening! Gambit, you could not have chosen a worse time to be a fool.
Jubilee? Jubilee? Could Jubilee have left without telling us? Something screwy's going on around here.
Where's Beast? I think he's in the Danger Room.
You and Rogue fly on ahead, and I shall meet you at the site of the disturbance.
Very well, Beast.
(CHUCKLING) How about a truly beastly workout? (LAUGHING) This seems a bit excessive.
Oh, dear.
MAN: Come on, blow up that mutant center! Y'all want to play catch? Get the mutants! (ALL EXCLAIMING) I summon torrential rains! (GRUNTING) Rogue! (MEN SHOUTING) Y'all hold this up for me.
You sure you can handle this bunch alone? Beast will soon be here to assist me.
Go! I'm out of here.
(POLICE SIREN WAILING) The arctic cold will cool their ardor! (ALL EXCLAIMING) -Do something! Make them pay! -Hey! Look out! If you want something done right -Fire on that mutant.
Full energy! -But, Captain I said fire! (GROANING) (GROANING) (CHUCKLING) (STORM GROANING) Enjoy your revenge, Morph.
I know I am.