Clarence US (2014) s02e02 Episode Script

1 I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! Good one, Sumo.
You want to go pull some cow tails? Oh, sure! Oh! Can't.
I got some stuff I got to do.
Later, Cricks.
Blah! Rise and shine, little dudes.
Hey, Pop Pop, Jimmy, Alligator, Motorcycle, Hot Sauce.
Y'all hungry for some grubbin'? Yeah, yeah, I hear you.
Quit your chirping.
Okay, open those hatches.
All right, little buddies, I got to get to school.
You guys stay put till I get back.
Whoa, there.
How'd you get out? You know you can't fly.
You guys are growing out of this ol' bunk.
I'll come back later and build you guys a new nest.
But for now "The brothers looked at each other inquisitively" Jeff.
Psst.
Hey, Jeff.
- Jeff.
- What, Clarence? - Ha.
- Oh! Neat! Hey, Sumo.
Okay, class, it was just a bird, okay? I'm sure he's fine.
Okay, l-let's get back to reading.
In this chapter, someone dies! "It was almost midnight" Uh, teacher! Uh, I need a I have to get a can I go to the bath Oh, no, Hot Sauce.
Did you follow me all the way here? Don't worry, little guy.
We'll get you fixed right up.
Home sweet Where'd everybody go? Motorcycle? Alligator? Pop Pop? Come on, quit playing, or I'll cook your hiney! Well, looks like it's just you and me now, Hot Sauce.
Not sure what to do with you except take you home with me! Ain't bad.
Hey, you're getting pretty good at this.
- Ryan! - Uh-oh.
- Yeah? - I just got a call from Ms.
Baker saying you haven't been to school for two days? You better not be hanging out with that goat kid again.
- You know what this means.
- Huh? No, no, not that.
Mom, no! Please! This stinks.
Hot Sauce, how'd you get out? Ryan, absolutely not! We are not gonna play this game.
Whoa! What? - Hey, Sumo.
- Hey, Sumo ugh! We've been really missing you around school, buddy.
Yeah, hope you're feeling okay.
And we brought some of your homework, too.
- Ah, hey, guys.
- Heard Ms.
Baker called your mom.
- Hmm? - Is everything okay? This place is messier than normal.
Did you guys let the dogs play inside again? No dog.
Hot Sauce! Doesn't look like Hot Sauce to me.
It looks like poop.
Guys, meet Hot Sauce.
What do you think? Wow.
He's so fast.
O-Okay.
- I think he thinks I'm a bigger bird.
- Hi, Hot Sauce.
Look at that coloring.
He's beautiful.
So, you guys want to play with him? - Yeah.
Um, maybe.
- Okay! Okay, the rules of freeze tag go like this first person Okay, Clarence is it.
Ha-ha! Too slow! - Oh! Missed me.
- Gotcha! Gotcha! Freeze tag.
You're supposed to freeze! I think I'm really close to beating you guys.
- Don't eat the cards.
- Your move, Sumo.
Uh, hold on, guys.
I got to pump.
Hold still, now.
Hey, maybe we can play something without Hot Sauce for a little while.
- What are you trying to say, Jeff? - I don't know, Sumo.
Hot Sauce is great and all, but he's an animal.
He's meant to run and hunt and I'm just not comfortable hanging out with him! Oh, whatever, Jeff! You're always salty! Clarence likes Hot Sauce, right, buddy? Oh, he's great.
Uh ow! I mean, okay, he's a little much.
If you can't handle my Hot Sauce, then you can just scram! - Um, see you at school, Sumo - Sorry, Sumo.
unless you never go back to school.
We don't need those bozos.
We don't need anybody.
We could have our own guy's night out! Guy's night! Just two guys.
All right, time for some grub.
Is eating chicken gonna be weird for you? Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Daddy, do you ever wish I was a boy? Hmm.
Oh, what? What? Oh, sweetie, well, then who'd be my little girl? Hey, dad, can you keep that bird as a pet? Bird? What are you Stay Stay back! Hey, my phone! My phone! Come back here! Hey! Sir! Sir! There are no pets allowed in the restaurant! There's too too many birds! Yeah, peck 'em, peck 'em, peck 'em.
Professor, I've loved you since the beginning.
Please, don't confuse me.
Just hold me.
Don't tell me what to do, Jennifer.
Who's the scientist here, you or me? - Oh, my! - Whoa! Ew! I got a bird, he's the coolest bird he's a rock star bird 'cause he got rock star hair Look, Hot Sauce.
A bird pal.
Aw, she's got baby chicklins.
Hey, maybe you can be the stepdad.
Hey! That's no way to treat a lady! Hey, stop! Hot Sauce! Stop it! Get off me, man! Geez, what's wrong with you?! Stupid homework.
Can you stop doing that? Come on, man.
Look at all this homework I got to do.
I don't know if I can handle another bath.
Oh, come on, Hot Sauce.
Not now.
Ohh, fine! Okay, okay! We'll go outside! Ooh! Well, we're outside now.
This is what you wanted, right? So do your thing, I guess.
Ohh, are you really just gonna stand there? Hey! Hey! Come back here! Hot Sauce! Hot Sauce, wait! Uh, uh, uh Oh, man, which way did you go? Found you! Hot Sauce! Stop! Hot Sauce! Hot Sauce! Ohh! Stop! Hold on! I gotcha! Sumo, stop! Let go! I can't! He's my friend! He's not.
He's just a bird, Sumo.
He belongs in nature.
Then maybe I do, too.
Sumo, you're not a bird man.
You're a boy man.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! - Whoa! Sumo! Sumo, no! Jeff, look! You're actually flying! Ha! Yeah! So long, guys! I'm living with the birds now! Hooray! You're flying! Hot Sauce, I want to go with you.
- Does this hurt? - Nah.
How about this? Does this hurt? - Nah.
- What about this? What about that? Hey, Clarence, how about giving that cast a break, huh? Sumo, you need anything else, honey? - No, I'm okay.
- All right, well, if you want any pop, there's a couple under the frozen thighs so your brothers wouldn't get them.
Thanks, mom.
I got to go clean up that mess that darn bird left everywhere.
Ugh! Look at this.
We're glad you stuck around, Sumo.
Ah, well.
It was probably for the best, anyway.
Now Hot Sauce is free to run and beat up all the birds he wants.
Aw, Sumo, don't be sad.
We're gonna take care of you.
You're gonna be our baby bird now.
Open your mouth, Sumo.
No, no, Clarence, you don't have to.
Stop! That's not how it works! No, really, Clarence.
Stop.
That's gross.