Gilmore Girls s02e02 Episode Script

- Rory? - Living room.
I need your advice on something.
What do you think? Not good? I'm not sure.
Have you tried the arts-and-leisure section? - I need you to be serious.
- You've got a newspaper on your head.
- I know.
- And you need me to be serious? - I am trying to figure out veil lengths here.
- Sure.
See, I kind of like this shoulder-length, semi-poofy thing like this.
But there's also a longer one that may be interesting.
Longer.
Sure.
- And then there's the full-on Diana.
- Right.
Which is nice, but it just might be a little - You're reading me.
- Wait, don't move.
Rory, stop it.
This arms race thing is really getting crazy.
We're having a serious conversation about my life's most important fashion decision.
Why not go to a wedding dress place and try a real veil on? - No way.
- Why? Too much taffeta.
Gives me cotillion flashbacks.
Fine.
Could you bend over so I can see what the weather will be like tomorrow? Actually, I went in one of those places yesterday.
- You did? Which one? - Marry Meme's.
- I see we're going top of the line.
- It was horrible! You need to order your wedding dress the first day of junior high.
And if you haven't, it's off the rack for you, missy.
I tried on three dresses, one of which gave me a rash.
- Has anyone missed the bustle? I haven't.
- It was not that bad.
They all looked wrong.
I'll be gross, and all the children will laugh.
Max will realize he's made a horrible mistake.
And then people will walk away, exactly as you're doing now.
- Let's go.
- Where? Wedding dress shopping.
- You're reading.
- I'm done.
- You need to see Dean.
- He's playing softball.
Your cure for cancer's almost finished.
We'll find the perfect thing for you to wear on your perfect wedding day.
There will be no pointing, mocking, or walking out.
Why did you say 'pointing'? - Keys.
- Thank You.
Spending the summer at Chilton.
Happy, happy, joy, joy.
If I don't improve my French grades, I can kiss Vassar goodbye.
You need to follow a study schedule.
I've told you this since second grade.
Which worries both of us.
- Maybe I won't go to college.
- You have to go.
- Princess Grace didn't go.
- Thank you for the history lesson.
- Take a pill.
- Marry rich.
Hey.
- You doing the summer school thing, too? - Yeah.
- What classes are you taking? - Well, I - What? - You're not talking to me.
I'm not? - Tristin? - PJ Harvey? I'll look at the board, then you can get back to your conversation.
There's a Rebuilding Together thing going on tomorrow.
They fix up homes for the needy.
It's a total easy gig that looks great on your college transcript.
- Sorry.
- Thanks, I'll think about it.
- You wouldn't like it.
- 'Cause you'll be there? - Yes, I'll be there.
- I'll think about it.
- You don't want to go.
- I'll see.
You don't.
It's not you.
I have multiple personalities.
It might be one of me.
It's hours of hammering, drilling, and dirt.
It's horrible, you'll hate it.
How do you know that I don't spend hours every week hammering and drilling? And dirt? I love dirt.
I collect it.
- You're hilarious.
- You're pathetic.
Fine.
Forget it.
- Why don't you want me to go? - I don't care if you go.
You just spent a lot of energy trying to convince me not to.
- I'm late for class.
- Are you going to be mad because you thought I was dating Tristin, even though I wasn't, all your life? - I have commitments.
- You don't see how stupid that is? Sorry if you thought we had a deep Thelma-and-Louise thing, but we didn't.
- Have it your way but I'm going tomorrow.
- Fine, go.
See if I care.
- I will.
- Great.
I hate summer! - Henry.
Hi, nice to see you.
- You, too.
What classes are you taking? Shakespeare, Physics, Obscure Russian Poetry.
Wow.
I'm still trying to get through Trig.
, but third time's the charm.
- I can help you if you want.
- I just may take you up on that.
- Lane's fine.
- Good.
I haven't talked to her in a while.
- I called once.
- And? Her mother answered.
She sounded angry.
- No, that's just Mrs.
Kim.
- I hung up, 12 times.
On the 13th time, she said she'd have the FBI trace the call and have me thrown in prison.
And though I know the punishment for multiple hang-ups isn't prison she sounded so capable of doing real damage that I Stopped calling? - Lane probably thinks I forgot about her.
- You want me to tell her you haven't? - That would be good.
- Done.
Maybe you could give her my number and she can call me.
- I'll get right on it.
- Thanks.
- Thank you.
Okay, bye.
- Bye.
- What? - Your trig.
Notes.
I think we may have nailed down the problem.
- 'Tomorrow I'm going to build a house.
' - Help build a house.
Did you tell them there's a light bulb in your closet that burned out in '97 you still haven't changed? It's for charity.
Don't those people have enough problems without having you as a contractor? I'm sure there will be real construction workers there.
I will be assisting and helping out those less fortunate than myself.
I will be getting college credit, and this is the end of this conversation.
You're right, it's a good thing.
Nice.
Keeps your halo shiny.
Wait.
When are you going to tell them? - Soon.
- When is soon? When the big hand hits the'S' and the little hand 'oon.
' You're getting married in three months.
Tell them now.
- Ring the bell.
- The longer you wait, the harder it'll be.
- Will you please ring the bell? - Tell them before dinner.
I will tell them when I'm ready.
You have to accept that because I'm the mother.
In some cultures, that means you have to do what I say.
- If you don't tell them in two weeks, I will.
- Apparently not in this one.
Good.
We'll have to eat quickly.
Your father has an early flight tomorrow morning.
Oh, I'm good.
Rory's going to build a house tomorrow.
I thought it was a little weird, too.
Walk as you babble, please.
Somebody must have scratched the silver.
Bring the bread out, too.
And pour the wine, please.
Come on, hurry up.
Yeah, because we don't want our salad to get cold.
Richard, dinner.
- Mom.
- Eat.
- Shouldn't we wait for Dad? - Don't worry about him.
He's the one with the early plane.
We don't have to go anywhere.
We can stay all night, have a party do some Jell-O shots, play Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board.
Pass the bread.
- Grandma, would you like - Yes, please.
- You started.
- You have a 6:00 flight.
- 6:00? Are you sure? - What do you mean? Of course I'm sure.
I checked it thrice with your secretary, because I know she's an idiot and all three times she told me 6:00.
I wrote it down.
I have your ticket right out on the - You're teasing me.
- Very possible.
- I don't find that amusing, Richard.
- Exactly the point of teasing, Emily.
- Hello, Lorelai.
- Hello, Father.
- Rory.
- Grandpa.
May I speak with you for a moment, please? Okay.
I wonder what that's all about.
I guess we'll find out later, right? Hey, whatever happened to Xuxa? I thought we should touch base, you and I, after that unfortunate incident last week.
You already called me about that.
I know, but I thought taking a moment to once again say to you in person how I know, and I appreciate it.
- We've never had a fight.
- No.
- This was our first one.
- Yes, it was.
- And I must say, I didn't care for it.
- Neither did I.
All right.
We should go back inside.
- We're fine now, right? - We're fine.
Buck up, Private.
Wait.
I wanted to give you something.
- What? - Come on.
- Where are you guys going? - We'll be right there.
Well, hurry, you're missing one hell of a conversation.
- I'm really loving this salad dressing.
- I'm glad.
- Lemony.
- Yes.
Nothing like a nice salad of lemony goodness.
Mom.
- I have something to tell you.
- Yes? Well, it's like this.
Could you put down your fork for a second? Thank you.
- Okay.
You know Max? - No, I don't.
I know you don't know-him know him, but you know of him, right? I've heard rumblings.
Max and I have been serious for quite a while now.
He asked me to marry him and I said yes.
I'm getting married.
Well, I think that's very nice.
I certainly hope we'll be in town for it, but if not, we'll send a nice gift.
Now excuse me.
I'm going to check on the roast.
- Are you okay? - I'm perfect.
- Really? - I have hit a level of perfection that's rarely seen outside the Victoria's Secret catalog.
I'm really sorry.
Do not be sorry.
What happened tonight was inevitable.
- I should have known not to tell Mom.
- You were trying to be nice.
Telling her I was getting married to a wonderful guy who will love me and make me happy.
That, and giving her my address when I moved out.
Two worst moves I made.
Maybe she'll think about it and call you and say she's sorry.
'Mom, I'm getting married.
'I'm an idiot.
And as my mouth was opening my mind was screaming, 'Don't do it.
I mean it.
You'll regret it.
' - But did my mouth listen? - No.
And it opened, and the words came out, and Emily was Emily and my mouth was stunned, and my mind said, 'I told you so.
' Then my mouth got mad 'cause no mouth likes to have its nose rubbed in it.
Now my mind and mouth aren't talking.
It'll take weeks to get them together.
Your mouth has a nose? - God, I'm crabby.
- You're hungry.
- No, I'm not.
- You didn't eat any of your dinner.
By the time I got my jaw off the ground, Speed Racer had taken my plate.
Luke will cheer you up, won't you? Sure, I'm great at spreading the joy.
What will you have? We'll have two coffees and a rant meal.
Extra cheese.
- No.
- Why? I'm through ranting.
I'll have an acceptance meal and a side of fries.
Please, you have not accepted this.
I'm a grown woman.
I do not need my mother's blessing to be happy.
- Must have been a good Oprah today.
- Just a little family drama.
No biggie.
- It's a little big.
- What's going on? I told my mother about me getting married and it was slightly ugly.
- Yep.
- Yep what? There's nothing like a wedding to screw up a family.
There's nothing like a family to screw up a family.
Something that's supposed to start nice.
Two people promising each other: 'I love you forever.
I want to die when you die.
'My life meant nothing until you used my toothbrush.
' - And then it starts.
- That's not exactly Who do you invite? Who sits where? Open bar? Yes or no? Auntie Juny doesn't eat chicken.
Uncle Momo's off his meds.
- Juny and Momo? - Just an example.
Of a retired circus couple? After all that planning, the reception will still be a disaster.
No matter how carefully you plan halfway through one of those Bette Midler ballads someone's drunk, or with someone's wife, and a chicken Kiev lands on the cake.
The Gettysburg Address was only one page long, and that was about a war.
- I call them like I see them.
- I've changed my order.
I'll have the Luke's-giving-Lorelai- a- migraine meal.
- Blue cheese or ranch? - Both.
Coming right up.
- Time? - 8:30.
- I'm late.
- Hold on.
Coffee.
- Thanks.
I'll see you tonight.
- Wait.
One sec.
I have to be there in 20 minutes.
- I made you something really cool.
- Can it wait till tonight? It won't be cool tonight.
What do you mean? What loses its cool factor in 12 hours? - This.
- What is that? - A hammer.
- It has feathers on it.
Why? So the rhinestones and bows won't feel lonely.
- What do I do with it? - Build a pretty house.
How long will it take to talk you out of giving it? - Forty minutes, an hour tops.
- Hand it over.
- Call me when you get home.
Be careful.
- I will.
I mean it, Timmy.
No falling down the well.
- You scared me.
- Sorry.
Where you going? - I'm doing that Rebuilding Together thing.
- Right.
I'll be fast.
Here's my CDs, my posters, my books three of my sweaters, and one Viva Glam lipstick.
I'll leave them here while I'm in Korea because Mom will search my room.
If she finds them, she'll throw them out and spend the summer - praying for my soul.
- I'll treat them like my own.
Okay.
Now, this is the Lane Kim retrieval kit.
It contains the phone number of my cousins in Korea a map of the house I'll be staying at, a picture of me now - and a mock-up of me in six months.
- You lost some weight.
This is that name of that guy at the American consulate and several Korean phrases written out phonetically: 'Help,' 'Have you seen this girl?' 'Comes for money,' et cetera.
- Still no return date info from the parents? - Nope.
But they did buy me a winter coat.
- When are you going? - Right after your mom's engagement - Do you think she heard me? - I don't think so.
She'd be here grilling us for details if she had.
She wouldn't pretend, to not kill the surprise? And risk clashing with the decor? - Right.
Okay, I got to go.
- Hey, Henry - Called him.
- And? He likes me.
He's perfect.
I'll never see him again.
You'll read about it in my novel: A Connecticut Yankee in Pusan.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Where you going? - I have to build a house.
- Okay, so where you going? - I'm serious.
- You're going to build a house? - It's for charity, and I'm late.
Why don't you go in? You and Mom can continue the Rory's-building-a-house routine.
Then move on to 'Who's on First?' - How long are you going to be gone? - I don't know.
Why? I just thought we could hang today, see a movie, get something to eat.
We could go to a bookstore, I'll watch you browse for some hours.
I would love to, but I have to do this.
- Blow it off.
- I can't.
Did I mention the bookstore for some hours? How about tonight? We can get a pizza and go on Amazon.
You'll be just as bored watching me order books, I promise.
- Deal.
- Good.
I have to go.
Excuse me.
You're touching a man with a saw.
What are you thinking? - I'm sorry.
- I could have hurt myself.
I could have hurt you.
A ton of hurt almost happened here.
I really am sorry.
I've never been on a job site before.
- It's nice.
- Okay, where you from? - Chilton.
My name - Come on, Chilton.
- No, it's Rory.
Chilton's my school.
- You got a hammer? - Yes, sir.
- Where is it? - It's a real hammer underneath.
- That's a hammer? - It's just dressed up a little.
- You dressed up a hammer? No, my mother did.
She does that.
She takes things that aren't pretty, and makes them pretty like a hammer.
One time, she made individual outfits for my Liquid Paper bottles: A clown, a cowboy, a newscaster.
- She's not insane.
She just sounds it.
- Okay.
Work here.
Wear these.
Don't look up.
Pay attention to your surroundings.
The words 'duck' or 'run' mean duck or run.
Wear sunscreen, drink water, get a button on the way out.
That's it? That's the instructions? - But I've never done this before.
- Tomorrow you won't be able to say that.
But people have to live in these houses.
They may have kids, pets, or breakables.
You have trouble, ask the person next to you.
Look out! Hey, you learn fast.
I didn't even mention that one.
This is my wall.
- What? - I've been working here.
I put together this wall.
Go someplace else.
- You put together this wall? - Go help with cement.
- That's very impressive.
- I've done it lots of times.
No big deal.
Louise, what did I just tell you? Use a grub ax for that.
Bite me.
I never pictured you as a Bob Vila kind of girl.
Rebuilding Together is a prestigious and respected organization.
- I've been volunteering for them for years.
- Really? You just love the overalls? - I don't.
Harvard does.
- What does that mean? When you apply to an Ivy League school, you need more than good grades and test scores to get you in.
Everyone who applies to Harvard has a perfect GPA and great test scores.
It's the extras that put you over the top: The clubs, charities, volunteering.
- Oh, yeah.
I know.
- I started volunteering in fourth grade.
I handed out cookies at the local children's hospital.
By 10, I was leading my first study group.
The youngest person in the group was 12.
I've been a camp counselor, organized a senior literacy program I worked a suicide hot line, I manned a runaway center.
Adopted dolphins, taught sign language, trained Seeing Eye dogs.
When did you have time for a life? I'll have a life after I graduate from Harvard.
If you'll excuse me, the drainage on the south side of this place sucks.
- Hi.
- Madeline.
Bye.
- You look good in dirt.
- Dean, hi.
- So how was it? - Long day.
The day is over.
Let's talk about the night.
There's a 7:30 showing of Barbarella.
You can bring your mom's purse the one with that monkey face, and we'll sneak in some burgers - What? - I can't.
- Get your mom's purse? - I can't do anything.
- Why not? - Because I have a lot of planning to do.
What planning? I'm 10 years behind on my extracurriculars.
What are you talking about? Paris has been accumulating them since she could walk.
She's done enough good deeds to bump Mother Teresa off the Harvard list.
Okay, I'm lost.
I've been studying my butt off my whole life and I really thought that was enough.
Then Paris tells me that everyone makes good grades.
It's the extras that put you over the top.
I thought she was messing with me like she always does - but she's right.
It makes total sense.
- What does? Good grades aren't enough.
I need to do things.
I need to volunteer, work for charity, help the blind, the orphans.
I don't know, I just need to do something.
Fine, what does this have to do with tonight? I need to start now.
You have to help the blind and the orphans now? Didn't I tell you I was 10 years behind? You can't make up for 10 years in one night.
I know.
I just need to get organized.
Rory, it's summer.
Summer's the time to hang out and kick back.
I can't hang out or kick back.
I need to find a retarded kid and teach him how to play softball.
Oh, God! Listen to me.
I am under-qualified and horrible.
- I thought we'd spend time together.
- We will.
- When? - Tomorrow, maybe.
You were busy today, so we made plans for tonight.
- Now you're blowing me off again.
- I'm not doing that.
- You'll go to summer school thrice a week.
- You knew about that.
We've been apart for a while.
I figured you wanted time with me.
This is about Harvard.
Excuse me, it's about Harvard.
I forgot.
Okay, fine.
You're mad because I want to be sure that I get into a good college? I'm mad because my girlfriend doesn't have time for me.
Stop it.
This is important.
- And it can't wait for one night? - No.
- Fine.
- Why are you acting like this? - Like what? - Like you're two? I'm not going to Harvard.
I couldn't care less about Harvard.
I just wanted to hang with you.
But apparently, since I'm two, maybe I'll just grow out of it.
I'm too tired to go out tonight, so I won't trust my accessorizing instincts.
Tell me what you think.
- I have no wilderness skills.
- You hate the purse? How can I get into Harvard if I have no wilderness skills? You'll have to give up your dream of majoring in logging.
I called the Fireflies.
Do they need troop leaders? Yes.
'I'll be a troop leader.
' The only catch is it's summer, camping season.
I need wilderness skills.
Why did you never take me camping? I couldn't get you to step on wet grass until you were three.
If you'd taken me camping, I'd have wilderness skills.
I'll take you upstairs and throw you out the window.
If you can grab the tree, I'll be your witness.
I called the Sunnyside Home.
'Do they need volunteers?' They don't, but they do need an accordion player for their Friday night polka party.
Why didn't I force you to learn the accordion? The library was closed.
They only have If the tutoring program at Chilton is still taking names, I can do that.
- Honey, calm down.
- I'm not prepared.
I will never catch up.
You will catch up, but not in one night.
You've made your lists and calls.
Why don't you relax, call Dean to come over? - We're in a fight.
- Why? - Because you never took me camping.
- Oh, boy, I'm really sucking tonight.
We were supposed to hang out, I told him I couldn't.
He got mad, and we're in a fight.
Listen, why don't I cancel on Max tonight? I'll hang out with you, we can make popcorn reminisce about how I never forced you to become a missionary.
No, go.
I'm fine.
I just need to focus on this.
- I can help.
- No, I need to do this alone.
- Are you sure? - I'm sure.
I'm not going to be home late.
Listen, I would reconsider calling Dean.
It's not his fault that you're so fabulous he can't think about anything else.
He just sits in his room, eating Froot Loops out of the box saying your name over and over.
- Time is ticking.
- 'Rory, I love you.
I will not be ignored.
' - Leave.
- I'll be home early.
Bye.
- You hate your dinner.
- No, I don't.
You've hardly touched it.
When somebody takes trouble to make your entrée look like a hat you hate to mess it up.
- Is something wrong? - No.
You can tell me.
That's what I'm here for.
- I thought it was just for eye candy.
- That, too.
I'm fine.
It's just stuff.
Rory's freaking out about not having enough extracurricular things to impress Harvard with.
- I can help her with that.
- I'm sure she'd greatly appreciate it.
- Is that all that's wrong? - Yeah.
It's just a lot of stuff to think about for the wedding.
I forgot to tell you.
I saw my parents today.
They just wanted me to tell you how thrilled they are.
My mother cried twice.
She said you don't have to call her 'Mom.
' - But you're welcome to if you want.
- Really? Then my father gave me a long talk about marriage - and the ways of making a wife happy.
- Dirty talk.
Then they gave me this.
- No, they did not.
- Yes, they did, too.
Did you tell them that we're paying for everything ourselves? I did.
Sookie's doing the cake, the ceremony's at my house, Patty's supplying chairs $35? It's the first of four installments, so we can't spend it all in one place.
- That is so cute.
- They just want to be involved.
That's really sweet.
Can I Thanks.
My mother even offered you her wedding dress.
Since three of you could fit into that dress, I took the liberty of declining it.
Hope she wasn't insulted.
No, I just told her you were wearing your mother's dress.
It doesn't matter whether you are or not.
- She just wanted to offer something.
- Let's get dessert.
- Are you okay? - I just think it's great.
It's great that your parents are so happy and into everything.
That must be nice to have that.
Think of it this way: Now they're your parents, too.
You'll have that, also.
Yes, I will think of it like that.
That is exactly how I will think of it.
Good.
Otherwise, I'd have to look at it like, 'Max has parents who love him 'and care about him, and I have parents.
' - I didn't mean to upset you.
- I'm not upset.
I can't get that one moment out of my mind.
'That's nice.
I hope we're in town.
' Who reacts like that? What sort of mind forms that reaction to: 'Hey, Mom, I'm getting married'? From all you've told me about your parents there's so much baggage between you guys.
You figure out a different way.
You tap into compassion or family obligation.
- You don't react like that.
- I agree.
It's wrong.
You can't change who they are.
You won't get anywhere trying to.
I don't want to talk about my parents anymore.
I don't want to speculate about them or analyze them or think about them.
- We should go.
- Come on, it's still early.
We'll go someplace else.
Talk a little bit more? Yes.
Absolutely.
Sounds good.
I'm sorry tonight brought up these bad feelings for you.
That's okay.
Make a right.
But I bet this was harder for your mother than you think it is.
Look what's happened to her over the last year.
She's getting back into your life, and suddenly everything changes on her.
Yeah, that's got to suck.
Go right.
Maybe once we get married, things will settle down.
You two will be able to work it out.
You never know.
I might be able to help the situation.
Act as a buffer or so.
That's a good thought.
Pull in here.
Lorelai, hold on.
I know what's going on.
I got to tell you, it's not a good idea.
This will take a second.
You should wait until tomorrow.
Calm down a little.
- Maybe you'll be more objective.
- You are not asleep.
Come on.
You are way too emotional for this.
I'm just emotional enough.
If you like, you can wait in the car because I really don't plan on being here that long.
What on earth Hi, Mom.
Do you have a sec to chat? Super.
- Lorelai, what is this? - I just wanted to see how you were.
- I'm fine.
- You are? Good.
I'm glad that you're fine.
I, however, am not fine.
We were about to go to bed.
We can do this in the morning.
Actually, no.
We can't do this in the morning.
We need to do it now.
- Are you drunk? - No, I'm not drunk.
I'm confused.
- About what? - About you.
What about me confuses you? So many things.
For example, why can't you keep a maid in this house? A thousand women must have gone through here in the 32 years that I've been alive.
Not one of them could stick it out.
This is what we need to discuss now? These are women from countries having dictatorships, civil wars, death squads.
All of that, they survived.
Five minutes working for Emily Gilmore, and people are begging for Castro.
I'm going to bed now.
Why is it that when your only daughter tells you she is getting married you can't muster up even a little enthusiasm? Even a little fake enthusiasm? Why don't you pretend that you care? This is the biggest thing to happen to me, possibly for the rest of my life.
You dismissed it, like I said: 'I'm thinking of getting a Honda.
What do you think?' - You're obviously hysterical.
- Why don't you care? Why have you never cared? No matter what has happened to me my entire life you've never been happy for me.
And that hurts, Mom.
- It really hurts.
- I'm not discussing this.
Do you know how it felt for me to tell you that I was getting married and to have you just brush it off like that? - Do you know? - No, I don't know! Possibly similar to finding out from a complete stranger my only daughter was getting married and had told everyone else in the world before she bothered to tell her mother! Possibly it felt something like that.
Now if you will excuse me, it is late and I am going to bed.
My parents would really like to have lunch with you and Mr.
Gilmore sometime soon.
Nice meeting you.
- I don't care.
- I just need a quick opinion.
It took me two seconds to tell you I don't care.
That's as quick as I get.
This is Lorelai's engagement party.
It's a once-in-a-lifetime event.
- I want it to be perfect.
- I am working.
- Just pick a cookie! - I don't want to.
Michel, for the rest of their lives Lorelai and Max will think back on their engagement party.
They're going to talk about three things: The friends who came the special song they danced to, and the cookies that they ate.
Their world is very small, isn't it? Macaroons or chocolate praline? Go back to the cooking room.
Not until you eat these and tell me what you think.
Sookie, I only eat 1,500 calories a day.
If I eat that, I cannot have my Boca Burger later.
Hey, Sookie.
Is there any coffee left? - I had a really lousy night.
- Oh, sorry.
I've been so busy, I didn't even think about it.
That's okay.
I'll make some myself.
No, I'll make it! I want to make it! Let me do it.
I'll make the coffee.
- Relax.
You're busy.
- No, I'm not.
Go back to the counter.
MicheI's stealing.
Oh, my God.
- What is this? - The dinner special.
The dinner special is a heart-shaped pastry with 'Max and Lorelai' written on it? I couldn't find any good salmon.
You're throwing me a wedding shower, aren't you? - It was supposed to be a surprise.
- Oh, my God! - This is amazing, Sookie, even for you! - Wait till you see the ice sculptures.
- When is it? - Tonight.
So your yen to hit the bingo parlor in Enfield was A vicious lie.
This is really incredible.
Is there any pink icing left on the planet? The whole town is in on it.
It's going to be quite the affair.
You'll be impressed with the amount of people that want to celebrate with you.
- No.
- Right.
I can't get over this.
You didn't, by any chance, invite my parents, did you? I did.
At first, I was really torn, because I know you have issues.
But it is your wedding, and I assumed you wanted them to be there.
- Oh, no.
Your mother told you.
- Sort of.
I thought I mentioned that it was a surprise.
Maybe I didn't.
That would be so typical of me.
The cat's already out of the bag.
I'm stuffing imported chocolate squares down my shirt so you don't see me walk into the kitchen with them.
Did your mother mention if they were coming? She never got back to me.
- No, she's got a thing tonight.
- Too bad.
- We can save her a piece of cake.
- That would be nice.
Attention, guests, the buffet line is clogging in Sector B.
I repeat, Sector B is moving too slow.
Keep it moving, people.
Hey, Mr.
DJ, put a record on.
- How's it sound? - Great.
I'm trying to find a blend between not too cliché-sounding traditional tunes with outer-left-field, should-be standards.
The Sinatra medley was great.
And skip anything else by The Damned.
- What time is it? - It's 8:00.
- What time do you leave? - I have a 10:00 flight.
Have I told you I'm going to miss you? - Write me, constantly.
- Every day.
Cards and letters, full of hope and 'see you soon.
' I'll be tying yellow ribbons around the old oak trees.
I will be back for the wedding.
- You better be.
- Just don't let her change the date.
Won't happen.
Max is teaching a summer course at the University of Toronto.
If you're back by summer's end, it will be fine.
- Don't say 'if.
' - Right.
I don't know if you realize that every gift so far has been for you.
In this town, I am the queen.
You are simply my jester.
A position I happily accept.
Come on, then.
How can you stand to leave all this for two months? You think Toronto will make you into an ice sculpture? - I don't think so.
- I wish you'd come with me.
- I have to work.
- Two months is a long time.
I know.
Will you still want me when I get back? I think there's a very good possibility that I will be just as infatuated with you then as I am now.
- Maybe more.
- Maybe more.
Come on, ladies.
Hurry up.
Love waits for no one.
Lucy, get off of Jenny's train.
All right, bouquets up.
And music.
How come you're not up there, Kirk? Oh, I don't tap anymore.
Bum knees.
I'm worried about this gazebo holding up all those hoofers.
They never did a trial run, like I requested.
I think it's okay.
The studs are definitely sound the two-by-fours are a nice Number 2 structural grade.
Or better, possibly.
I built a house yesterday.
Oh, for Pete's sake.
No tossing of the Jordan almonds.
I repeat, put the almonds down.
This is quite a party.
Elegant and understated, just like my mother.
So, how are you? - I'm fine.
How are you? - Me? - I'm an idiot.
- No, you're not.
- I'm so sorry, Rory.
- I'm sorry, too.
- I don't know what happened.
- We had a fight, that's all.
- I've just missed you and - I missed you, too.
I got jealous of Harvard, which is crazy 'cause I love the fact that you're going to Harvard.
You have to do something that's going to help you get there I don't even really understand it myself.
I didn't help.
- I was all wigged out when I got home.
- You had all the right to be.
It's that when it comes to Harvard, sometimes I get a little tunnel vision.
- And it's getting closer - You do not have to explain.
But I don't want you to feel unimportant, because you're not.
- I'm glad.
- I mean it.
You could only be more important to me if you had a Kit Kat growing out of your head.
I can't make promises, but I'll give it a try.
- I'm sorry.
- Don't be.
I'm not going to a fancy school.
I don't have that kind of pressure.
I can't even imagine what that must feel like.
You could go to a fancy school if you wanted to.
- I don't think so.
- Why not? You're smart.
- No, you're smart.
- You are, too.
I could help you organize your extracurricular activities because I'm now an expert at it.
- I don't - How are your wilderness skills? - What? - Do you accept my apology? Yeah, I accept your apology.
You okay? You know, I'll be right back.
Only three treats per person.
No hogging of the treats.
If caught with more than three treats on a plate you will be faced with possible expulsion from said party.
- Kirk, could I see that for a sec? - Sure.
Thanks.
Why aren't you at your party? That's funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.
- I just got kind of busy here.
- Yes, I can see that.
They keep making that ketchup slower and slower.
It's the Heinz family's little joke.
It's really pretty crazy out there.
- I can imagine.
- Lots of people all having fun.
- Just the kind of thing you'd hate.
- Sounds awful.
- You would be miserable.
- Yes, I would.
In spite of all that, I was thinking, and you don't have to that maybe you could pull yourself away for a second.
Finish the ketchup tonight, but leave the Worcestershire sauce for tomorrow.
- I'll see how it goes.
- Okay.
It's a big night for me tonight, and it feels like you should be there.
Anyway, I'll let you get back to your ketchup.
- The macaroons are going like hot cakes.
- Yeah, everything's a big success.
Look at all this.
Isn't it beautiful? I know it's clichéd, but it is so romantic.
It makes you giddy in a sappy kind of way, doesn't it? - Sure, I guess.
- I hope they're happy.
What am I saying? How could they not be happy? They're in love.
They have each other.
Everything's perfect! Okay, I get it.
Jackson, what are you You think I need a piano to fall on my head? I don't think anyone needs a piano to fall on their head.
All the marriage talk and the 'Jackson, you should see Lorelai's ring.
It's so beautiful.
' - It is.
- I understand.
I'm hip, okay? We've hit that point in our relationship where the hints are starting that will be followed by the where-are-we-going talk.
That'll only end in an ultimatum.
- Suddenly all hell breaks loose! - Okay, no more sugar for you.
So I think I need to say this right now.
- I'm not ready for marriage.
- Okay.
However, I'd be willing to move in.
- Move in where? - Move in with you.
- Jackson, you're hilarious.
- I am? 'I'll move in with you.
' What a riot! - Why are you laughing? - Your face.
- God, you are good! - I wasn't joking.
Come on, let's go get some punch.
I'm serious.
I'm moving in.
Jackson, stop.
You're giving me a cramp.
Sookie, get back here.
Marina, the door, please.
Thanks.
Hey, Mom.
I was in the neighborhood because there's that wedding dress place.
Elizabeth Taylor bought one of her dresses there.
I was trying to make a decision about a veil.
I thought you might have an opinion about which one would look best on me 'cause you know me.
I thought I'd stop by and ask you which one you thought would be good.
On me.
So which one? You're quite capable of choosing that yourself, Lorelai.
I'm sorry.
All right, you're sorry.
I don't know how to tell you things, Mom.
I don't know if you've noticed this or not, but we don't communicate very well.
When something good happens to me I'm just afraid you're going to make me feel bad about it.
When something bad happens to me I'm always afraid you'll say, 'I told you so.
' I'm not sure if that's always fair.
And I'm sure I share part of the blame for this circle we get into.
You think your words don't have any effect on me.
But they do.
I just didn't want to feel bad about this.
So I waited.
And I really didn't mean to hurt you.
I will let you get back to that letter there.
Your head is much too big for a veil.
You might consider a tiara.
A tiara? That's what I wore.
Okay.
I'll think about that.
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