Kim's Convenience (2016) s02e02 Episode Script

- What are you doing? - Bagging.
Okay, Mr.
Kim, if you don't care about me I don't.
At least care about the sea turtles.
Did you not read the pamphlet I gave you? No.
I threw in garbage.
First of all, that should have gone in the recycling, and more importantly, sea turtles are dying because of your plastic bags.
- My bag? - Yeah, your bag, their bags, I am boycotting all plastic bags.
Hmm.
So, how you carry? I will be like the majestic sea turtle and adapt.
Did you know that plastic bags kill more sea turtles than sharks? You mean, uh, bag kill shark, or shark kill turtle? Either way, it is a travesty, and it needs to be stopped.
Oh, you right.
I help.
Take bread, put in hand.
I insist.
Turtle very important.
Like this.
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- Okay.
Take a banana and put it in the pocket.
- All right.
- It's tight - Okay.
- Yeah.
Okay.
You can have a little bit more inside here, use other hand, too.
Here.
And a can under chin (CHUCKLES) Okay.
That's unflattering.
Again you saving the sea turtle? - You understand me.
- I get door.
Okay, well, always a nice casual visit.
- Okay, see you.
- Bye-bye.
- He not gonna make it home.
- Not even close.
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING) Thanks.
There he is, Mr.
Fitness.
Making us all look bad.
Hey, I'd drive a car if you paid me more.
And take all this away from you? The fresh air, the exercise, the - (SIGHS) - Joie de vivre.
(CHUCKLES) And it's fast.
My average speed on the trip in was Nine hundred kilometres an hour.
Ooh! That's my boy.
I think that's just the number of calories I burned.
(CHUCKLES) - No, I think it's just 9:00.
- Still, you're on time.
I used to bike all the time back home, zipping through the streets.
(CHUCKLES) "There goes the town bike," they'd say.
Not in that way.
The bike was actually shared by everyone in the town.
And, boy, did I get around.
Again, not in that way.
You should totally get one.
We could be bike buddies.
I don't know, there's a whole big city bike culture I don't understand.
The gears, the bells, the helmet, it's a lot.
It's a bike.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Hi, Umma.
Hi, Appa.
Hi, Janet.
Hi, Janet's dirty laundry.
Hi, Janet.
Yah, something wrong with you own washing machine? No, I just miss spending time with you guys.
Oh, miss spending time with the free hydro, free detergent, the free food.
Appa, don't be mean.
Yeah, Appa.
That's not award-winning behaviour.
I'd expect more from the Moss Park Business Person of the Year.
- What, you hear something? - No.
Janet.
I just have a good feeling about it.
Don't jinx.
They announce tomorrow.
I have good feeling, too.
Just stop talking, hmm? I never win, whole thing is just stupid.
Then why can't we talk about it? No more talking until tomorrow.
In general, or about the award? - Just stop.
- Janet, we go upstairs now.
Make space on the Don't Touch Wall for, you know, something.
- Like an award? - I can still hear you.
(BICYCLE BELL RINGS) I got a surprise for you.
No What is that? A buddy of mine fixes up old bikes.
I got it for practically nothing.
I have to pay you something for it.
Oh, forget it.
It was like 20 bucks.
Forty with the new rims, but - So, $40? - Well, it was $80 total, - but it's a gift so, $45.
$50.
- (BICYCLE BELL RINGS) (CHUCKLES) I love it.
Oh, I almost forgot.
The helmet was $30.
But seriously, don't worry about it.
Uh, are these eggs free-range? (SIGHS) Not free.
Price is on the top.
No, like, are the chickens kept in cages? (SIGHS) We don't have chicken here.
Do the farmers keep the chickens inside cages? Oh, good question.
You go to farm, you find out.
Uh, these are local.
Very fresh.
You will like.
Oh, okay, thanks.
- Oh, Mr.
Chin, good morning.
- It certainly is.
And as Secretary of the Moss Park Business Association, I am happy to say someone here is about to have a very rewarding morning.
(CHUCKLES) It's nothing.
I just try to work hard.
- Congratulations, Mr.
Kim.
- Oh, thank you Oh, no, the winner isn't Mr.
Kim, it's Mrs.
Kim.
What? - No.
- Oh, yes.
You both received votes, but Mrs.
Kim blew away all the competition.
Congratulations, Mrs.
Kim.
Well, it must be some mistake.
No mistake.
And believe me, I asked for several recounts.
(SIGHS) Congratulations on you award.
- (MR.
CHIN CHUCKLES) - Our award.
She's right, you should both be very proud.
But mostly Mrs.
Kim.
(UMMA SIGHS) You using the washing machine? I wanna do a load.
No, I did mine at my parents'.
Sweet.
- What? - Your load is one shirt? Yeah.
That's all that's dirty.
Then wait until other things are dirty.
But I wanna wear that shirt.
Is this the first time you've done this? Yes.
This is why our hydro bill is so crazy.
But this way, I don't risk ruining my shirt with other colours.
Your shirts are all black.
Because I carefully wash them.
Individually.
Fine! - Happy? - Not really.
GERALD: Hmm.
My wallet is in there.
Oh, God Life in the bike lane, am I right? Hey, you are looking a lot better today.
I think you're really getting the hang of it.
Oh, yeah.
(CHUCKLES) I mean, a lot of people yell when you ride on the sidewalk.
And I might have something called saddle rash, but I think I'm hitting my stride.
And just loving it.
Yeah, it really gets the heart pumpin'.
(CHUCKLING) Is that what that is? Usually, I bring a fresh shirt to change into.
Oh, I tried that, but it looks like the sweat went right through the backpack.
- (PANTS) - Whoa.
It's weird because I know the AC is on, but I feel like I'm getting hotter.
It's a cool-down period, you'll get used to it.
It's so great, right? So great.
(CHUCKLES) (CHUCKLES) (KNOCKING ON DOOR) - JANET: Hey.
- Hey.
So, I was thinking about our conversation last night, and maybe, we just need to be more considerate? Yeah, I totally agree.
Which is why I'm doing all my laundry in cold water from now on.
Great.
Yeah, because our hydro bill is so crazy.
- I know, right? - Yeah.
And I know how you love to take those really long, hot baths.
And then shower, like, right afterwards.
To wash off the bubbles.
And that's no problem.
But you know what would be super considerate? Is if you could clean your hair from the drain and the wall when you're done? Yeah, of course.
That would be awesome.
Thank you.
You know what else would be, like, so considerate? Mmm? If after shaving, you could clean the sink and the floor, for some reason.
- Done.
- Hmm.
And before I forget, did you make scrambled eggs recently? Not today.
Oh, no, they're definitely a few days old.
I'm soaking the pan, okay? Okay, well, while the pan soaks, maybe you can clean up your used tea bags from our coffee table, and, I don't know, everywhere.
I'm reusing them.
It's called being good to the environment.
Unlike your one shirt killing-the-planet wash! My pants and wallet were in there, too! Again, they shut you out.
What is this, 10 years in a row, now? Oh, I'm not counting.
Who won this year? Oh, let me guess, a woman.
Why you say that? Oh, please.
Business association, so politically correct.
They don't give awards to people who deserve them, - just the flavor of the month.
- What flavor? It's all optics, to gain flavor with the city.
It's a racket! Actual, Mrs.
Kim is win award this year.
Well, in that case, they've made an admirable choice.
Besides, we've all won this award.
It's good for a woman to win it, right? I never win.
Not recently, but you must have Never, never? Oh.
MRS.
MEHTA: You're a celebrity, Mrs.
Kim.
Oh, that's a good price on cauliflower.
Yeah.
It's just community paper.
You can keep, I have lots.
So proud of you.
Though Mr.
Kim doesn't look too happy.
I think he think he is going to win this year.
Don't let his disappointment take away from your achievement.
This store wouldn't be half the success it is without you.
- Yeah, you right.
- (CHUCKLES) Well, I must be going.
Where's my husband? - He left.
- Of course he did.
"Marry a Mehta," they said.
"He'll take care of you.
" I had servants in India.
Now, I live with a man who microwaves cheese on toast.
Hey, everything okay? I'm just so mad right now.
What's wrong with people in this city? - What happened? - (SIGHS) My bike was stolen.
Oh.
That sucks.
And I so looked forward to that morning ride.
I mean, yes, sometimes, it was a challenge, but, boy, did I love that challenge.
And somebody stole that from me.
(SHANNON SIGHS) We could try getting you a new one.
I mean, probably not for the same price I'm just too mad to even think about it right now.
I get it, I'm sorry.
Hey, you look nice today.
- Not now, Terence! - Okay.
- That was a bit harsh.
- It's a tough city.
Excuse me, do you have Apple Pay? - Appa pay? - Yes.
Why would I pay? Oh, no, I'll pay, but with Apple Pay.
We take cash and debit over $15.
- Great, thank you.
- (SIGHS) (CASH REGISTER BEEPING) Oh - Congratulations.
- Thank you very much.
Yeah.
Store wouldn't be "half as successful" without her.
Of course it would be.
Exactly half.
We both work hard, together.
But Mrs.
Kim work so much harder.
I only open store, close store, go to wholesale, but Mrs.
Kim, she rearrange cookie on the shelf, and that make all difference.
I do more than that.
I get involve in community, work with other store.
I am kind to customer, not like you.
Maybe that's why I win.
Only reason you win is because you is woman.
I'm going to go.
So, thank you both, equally.
When I say you is a woman You don't even care about the award.
Why would you? Award is so stupid, only dumb woman like me can win! I not say you is dumb.
You care about award so much.
Here, you take.
Take! Take! - You win, you keep.
- No, no.
I don't deserve.
- You take it.
- No, no.
- Take! - No! Oh, fine.
Nobody wants! Yeobo! Yeobo! My card (CLICKS TONGUE) Appa pay.
See, a weekday picnic is possible.
All it takes is a little Sunday night meal prep.
Dude, I thought you boiled the eggs.
That's what the timer was for.
Ugh.
Hey, Kimch, check it out.
What, more chipmunks? They're not going to hurt you.
No, that guy.
I think that's Shannon's bike.
Yeah.
That's definitely it.
You up for this? Oh, yeah.
Hey, bro, nice bike.
Where'd you get it? - Someone gave it to me.
- Oh, yeah? That's pretty ironic 'cause, uh, it looks exactly like my friend's bike.
That's not how irony works.
You better give us that bike.
Look, there's obviously been a misunderstanding.
(SIGHS) I can't believe Appa would say something so stupid.
Yeah.
He don't appreciate what I do.
Gerald's exactly the same.
I mentioned one thing about how he washes his clothes, and he gets all up in my face.
Yeah.
And your Appa only still thinking about himself.
And then he goes on about how I'm so messy and don't do dishes every day.
But I'm trying to save the planet.
He doesn't get that.
You know, all men is the same.
Your Appa don't even see how much I And who doesn't take a shower after a bath? - Janet, this is not about you! - I know, it's about Gerald.
No, this is about me.
Your Appa don't appreciate, you don't listen, and Gerald is right.
Okay, I get that you're in a sensitive place right now, but it's not my fault your generation let men diminish the achievements of hard-working women.
I work hard, deserve award! And you could work harder to cleaning up! Because I'm a woman? No, because you is messy like a pig! I am You (GRUNTS) Wait, Janet, come back here! Janet, you tea bag! Janet! Janet, the tea bag is here! Tea bag! FRANK: Is it AA or AAA? What they should do is make a combo pack.
Just buy both, and make combo pack at home.
Oh Ooh, someone's in the doghouse.
Woof.
- Can I offer some advice? - No.
Never go to bed angry.
Or hungry for that matter.
Bernice and I used to stash a box of crackers in the night stand Frank, why I would take advice from you when you is divorce? - (SIGHS) What I mean is - Hey, hey No, no, no.
I stuck my hand in a gopher hole, and I got bit.
Yeah.
Mrs.
Kim is win award for business.
Uh-huh.
I tell her only reason she win is because she is a, you know Asian? - A woman! - Oh, right, right.
- Wow, that's a doozie.
- Yeah.
I was never any good with awards, either.
They all went to my brother, Dean.
Provincial track champ, which is where he met Kathy.
She had a speech impediment, but I never held that against her.
Frank, what's you point? The point is, I used to sneak into Dean's room just to stare at those trophies.
One day I took one down, and accidentally smashed a mug that Kathy had potted for Dean.
I tried to bury it in the backyard, which is how I dug up Cinnamon, our Irish setter.
(CHUCKLES) Dean had quite a laugh at that.
But who's laughing now? I don't know.
Not Dean, he got hit by a truck.
And I miss him dearly.
- You see what I'm getting at? - No.
I never got to apologize for the comic book.
What comic book? Did I not mention the comic book? (APPA SIGHS) That's really key to the whole thing.
The point is, I don't wanna be remembered for the things I broke, I wanna be remembered for the things I fixed.
Now, I've forgotten why I came in here.
Right, box of crackers.
Did you see the look on his face? Oh, man, so shocked! Hey, look what we found.
- K-Town boys representin'! - Whoo! Where did you find it? We caught the guy red-handed.
Some sketchy-looking dude says he found it.
No, no, no, someone gave it to him.
Right.
- Jung was badass.
- (CHUCKLES) - You didn't hurt him, did you? - What? Of course not.
Good.
Because I did kind of give it to him.
- What? - I felt bad for him.
It seemed like he could use it more with his nomadic lifestyle.
Seriously? The rims alone are worth 40 bucks.
Okay, I'm sorry, I wanted to love it, I really did.
But it's just so hot, and the seat kills, and you can't carry a coffee, and the hand signals are all so confusing.
Like, why is this right turn? - It's not.
- See? So, you just gave it away? Yeah.
Dude, we just stole a guy's bike.
No, I'm the one that actually paid for the bike.
But I gave you money for it.
Well, not the full amount, but yeah.
And she gave it to that guy.
Yeah, we stole that guy's bike.
So, our neighbour keeps calling me "Ray.
" I think I've let it go on for too long.
I might just have to run with it now.
Look, I overreacted before, and got defensive I know, I got defensive, too, and then my hands started sweating I'm really sorry.
Oh, it just happens, I think it's stress in the hand glands.
I mean, I'm sorry about yelling.
Oh, yeah.
Me, too.
Um - Are you moving out? - No.
- I cleaned.
- Oh.
Feels a lot bigger in here without all the stuff.
That we both leave around.
(CHUCKLES LIGHTLY) Okay, I'm going to bed.
- Okay.
- Good night.
Oh, um, before you go to bed, one more thing So, when you're spreading peanut butter around, can you just use all the peanut butter instead of leaving half of it on the knife and in the sink? Oh.
(CHUCKLES) Ha ha.
Okay.
Good night.
(SIGHS) Yeah, closing time.
- I don't want cookie.
- You deserve cookie.
You think cookie fix? I think cookie taste good.
- I do lots of thing, Appa.
- I know.
I don't need award.
I don't care what other people think, I only care what you think.
- And you think we is not same.
- No, we is not the same.
(SCOFFS) I want chip over here, you move chip over here.
We sell more chip.
I want Clear Pepsi.
We order Clear Pepsi.
We still have Clear Pepsi.
You want second baby.
I don't think it's a good idea.
- Then we have Janet.
- (SOBS AND CHUCKLES) I still don't think it's a good idea.
(CHUCKLES) Appa.
You not win award because you is woman, you win award because you is smart and good at business.
(UMMA GASPS) You fix.
Frank help.
But not for Don't Touch Wall upstairs.
Here, everybody can see.
(GASPS) I like there.
(CHUCKLES) (APPA SIGHS) Frank Dude, we are so sorry.
It's okay.
KIMCHEE: - Huge misunderstanding.
Please, take the bike.
It's all good.
Got a new bike.
That's your bike? Yeah, I forgot my key.
Seriously, take this one.
Mine's way nicer.
It's got better shifters, carbon forks, this thing.
Here, grab the other end, and we'll get some leverage going.
Come on.
MAN: Hey.
That's my (BLEEP) bike! Okay, I'll take it.
Dude, drop the cutters.
Are you kidding? These are worth, like, 20 bucks.
- Let's go! - Yeah, that doesn't look good.
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)