Superjail! (2007) s02e02 Episode Script
Mayhem Donor
Superjail! Good morning, sir.
All preparations are set to review our slate of new moneymaking initiatives.
Wonderful! Even you couldn't bore me on R&D review day, Jared.
Yah, well.
Let us review your new contraband funnel.
Just look at all that contraband.
Unfortunately, sir, the revenue stream from selling contraband doesn't even come close to the operating costs of the funnel.
What about the cheap power from our inmate operating cardio cylinder? I'm afraid it's not enough.
So far they've only generated enough power to charge one toaster for 30 seconds.
We've almost reached golden brown, Sir.
At least our oil rates are performing the expectations, yes? Actually, Sir, drilling for oil in a volcano is a very costly and very dangerous task.
Which is why we should complete our inmate and mobile drills.
We just need several billion dollars more to finish the accents and the racing stripes.
Money we just don't have! Then we have to work our current initiatives a little harder.
What? No! Not so fast, ugly.
Here.
What happened to me? Glorious cleansing fire! We had to piece you together with the unburnt bits of whomever.
But I-I-I'm a-a-a freak! Nonsence! You'll be your old self again in no time.
These sorts of procedures aren't expensive for nothing.
Expensive? Be grateful! It would have cost double had I purchased these viral young limbs in the open market.
You mean those mangy meat slabs are actually worth something? Perhaps.
To a hospital that like saving lives and doesn't like asking questions.
That's it! Superjail will sell its surplus limbs! Now shake whoever's leg that was, and work out the boring details with the nearest hospital.
W-w-what was that, Jared? Nothing.
I'll get right on it.
Jailbot, Alice.
Go downstairs and gather up that savoury pink gold! And as you can see I'm not just a handsome and enthusiastic salesman, I'm also a satisfied customer.
Hmm, lots of tattoos, tissue damage Still, the price is right.
W-what do you say? Can you believe this? Superjail has never been so profitable.
It's a golden age of incarceration sciences.
Hands off, dickhole! It's not me, it's his limbs that It'd better be ching chang talk for 'I'm sorry'.
Alice.
Shouldn't you be down preping our next shipment of man-slaughter moneymakers.
Nope.
We're pretty much out of non-dismembered limbs.
Store is closed.
Alice, Alice, Alice.
Accidents are a part of life, right? Kinda.
And the buzzard has itself a feast, when the rabbit's accidentally run over.
Rabbit? That's right, Alice.
So, say you're a buzzard in a road full of rabbits.
Do you become a crossing guard, or do you just let a few and natural accidents happen.
Right accidents.
Exactly.
And if Superjail gets its rabbit need, someone may see a little extra in their paycheck.
How about we raise the stakes.
Winner gets to savour my tenderloin.
Ahh, jeeze, I'd a I'd love to guard you, but Yeah, yeah, yeah, I hear ya.
This is a tough one.
A woman's work is never finished.
Nein, nein, nein, I'm sorry, gentlemen.
There's simply no more room for these.
Fine.
But if these hides rot, it's coming out of your hide.
Literally.
Yes.
Well.
Then perhaps we can store them in this old food preservative.
Looks like innovation is afoot.
And a hand.
And a leg.
But it's missing one ingredient, that would really make the flavour come alive.
E.
V.
O.
O.
? E.
V.
I.
L.
Such a beauty! Come to papa! Come, come, my friends.
Hear what my beautiful creation has to say.
Brothers of the flesh.
We come to free you of your hatred.
Raceless und classless.
We shall end men suffering and banish all races in favour of a single shade of agenda.
Come! Be free off this world as we unite here! Eat well, my child.
What the hell? My precious inventory is running a march.
Jailbot! Why do you resist? We only strive for unity and harmony of our own life.
Take it.
You'd do me a favor.
Come on, guys! We've gotta help her.
Come! (Bend) with my loving embrace.
Think of something! This slimy slime-marketer's destroying Superjail.
Really burning my hide.
That's it! With the mobile drills we can dig down to the lava pits and burn this thing alive.
Without the racing stripes? We all gonna die! Superjail Mobile Drills.
Initiate launch sequence.
Superjail Mega Drill Humanoid Metal Masher Mode.
Go! It's gaining on us! We're not gonna make it! Dammit! That's it.
I'm taking over.
Want a screw? Join us in eternal harmony.
Hey, ugly.
What of your borrowed parts are tougher? Racist arm, tighten your grip.
Irish leg, widen our stance.
Black arm, fire the bazooka.
Bitch! Who you calling cracker? Silence, lesser parts.
Yeah, Jimbo, shut you bitch ass mouth and listen to the hive mind.
Bitch? My mouth? You'd better get your black ass back to your side of the (bulb).
That's it, you guys.
Remember your petty differences and fight! Okay, I'm out.
Some great unifier.
Nice work, buddy! Way to instigate a race ride and save us all! I guess with a little discouragement and a few harsh words you can ruin even a tightiest bond.
Good work, team! Sync & script by kartoshin
All preparations are set to review our slate of new moneymaking initiatives.
Wonderful! Even you couldn't bore me on R&D review day, Jared.
Yah, well.
Let us review your new contraband funnel.
Just look at all that contraband.
Unfortunately, sir, the revenue stream from selling contraband doesn't even come close to the operating costs of the funnel.
What about the cheap power from our inmate operating cardio cylinder? I'm afraid it's not enough.
So far they've only generated enough power to charge one toaster for 30 seconds.
We've almost reached golden brown, Sir.
At least our oil rates are performing the expectations, yes? Actually, Sir, drilling for oil in a volcano is a very costly and very dangerous task.
Which is why we should complete our inmate and mobile drills.
We just need several billion dollars more to finish the accents and the racing stripes.
Money we just don't have! Then we have to work our current initiatives a little harder.
What? No! Not so fast, ugly.
Here.
What happened to me? Glorious cleansing fire! We had to piece you together with the unburnt bits of whomever.
But I-I-I'm a-a-a freak! Nonsence! You'll be your old self again in no time.
These sorts of procedures aren't expensive for nothing.
Expensive? Be grateful! It would have cost double had I purchased these viral young limbs in the open market.
You mean those mangy meat slabs are actually worth something? Perhaps.
To a hospital that like saving lives and doesn't like asking questions.
That's it! Superjail will sell its surplus limbs! Now shake whoever's leg that was, and work out the boring details with the nearest hospital.
W-w-what was that, Jared? Nothing.
I'll get right on it.
Jailbot, Alice.
Go downstairs and gather up that savoury pink gold! And as you can see I'm not just a handsome and enthusiastic salesman, I'm also a satisfied customer.
Hmm, lots of tattoos, tissue damage Still, the price is right.
W-what do you say? Can you believe this? Superjail has never been so profitable.
It's a golden age of incarceration sciences.
Hands off, dickhole! It's not me, it's his limbs that It'd better be ching chang talk for 'I'm sorry'.
Alice.
Shouldn't you be down preping our next shipment of man-slaughter moneymakers.
Nope.
We're pretty much out of non-dismembered limbs.
Store is closed.
Alice, Alice, Alice.
Accidents are a part of life, right? Kinda.
And the buzzard has itself a feast, when the rabbit's accidentally run over.
Rabbit? That's right, Alice.
So, say you're a buzzard in a road full of rabbits.
Do you become a crossing guard, or do you just let a few and natural accidents happen.
Right accidents.
Exactly.
And if Superjail gets its rabbit need, someone may see a little extra in their paycheck.
How about we raise the stakes.
Winner gets to savour my tenderloin.
Ahh, jeeze, I'd a I'd love to guard you, but Yeah, yeah, yeah, I hear ya.
This is a tough one.
A woman's work is never finished.
Nein, nein, nein, I'm sorry, gentlemen.
There's simply no more room for these.
Fine.
But if these hides rot, it's coming out of your hide.
Literally.
Yes.
Well.
Then perhaps we can store them in this old food preservative.
Looks like innovation is afoot.
And a hand.
And a leg.
But it's missing one ingredient, that would really make the flavour come alive.
E.
V.
O.
O.
? E.
V.
I.
L.
Such a beauty! Come to papa! Come, come, my friends.
Hear what my beautiful creation has to say.
Brothers of the flesh.
We come to free you of your hatred.
Raceless und classless.
We shall end men suffering and banish all races in favour of a single shade of agenda.
Come! Be free off this world as we unite here! Eat well, my child.
What the hell? My precious inventory is running a march.
Jailbot! Why do you resist? We only strive for unity and harmony of our own life.
Take it.
You'd do me a favor.
Come on, guys! We've gotta help her.
Come! (Bend) with my loving embrace.
Think of something! This slimy slime-marketer's destroying Superjail.
Really burning my hide.
That's it! With the mobile drills we can dig down to the lava pits and burn this thing alive.
Without the racing stripes? We all gonna die! Superjail Mobile Drills.
Initiate launch sequence.
Superjail Mega Drill Humanoid Metal Masher Mode.
Go! It's gaining on us! We're not gonna make it! Dammit! That's it.
I'm taking over.
Want a screw? Join us in eternal harmony.
Hey, ugly.
What of your borrowed parts are tougher? Racist arm, tighten your grip.
Irish leg, widen our stance.
Black arm, fire the bazooka.
Bitch! Who you calling cracker? Silence, lesser parts.
Yeah, Jimbo, shut you bitch ass mouth and listen to the hive mind.
Bitch? My mouth? You'd better get your black ass back to your side of the (bulb).
That's it, you guys.
Remember your petty differences and fight! Okay, I'm out.
Some great unifier.
Nice work, buddy! Way to instigate a race ride and save us all! I guess with a little discouragement and a few harsh words you can ruin even a tightiest bond.
Good work, team! Sync & script by kartoshin