Nip/Tuck s02e03 Episode Script

Previously on Nip / Tuck: What are you gonna do? I'm not gonna walk away over dumb shit like DNA.
I want a face-lift.
I think I work better on women I've screwed.
Once you've seen a woman's come face, you've seen her soul.
You slept with my mother.
Stop hurting me because you can't have me, Christian.
Ms.
Mabika, tell me what you don't like about yourself.
My clitoris.
- And the problem with it is? - I want an orgasm.
In America, on my modeling shoots, I meet women who enjoy having sex.
Sex, sex, sex.
All the time.
They do take a break every now and then.
I was victim of female genital mutilation.
The daja, the midwife she said I was the worst girl she ever cut because of all the screaming.
My mother had to sit on me and hold my legs open while the witch sliced off my clitoris with a sharp piece of glass.
And then she used it to tear out the folds surrounding it.
I didn't think this sort of thing still went on.
In Somalia, over 90%/% of the women have it done.
It is a fatwa.
One of the 10 obligations a woman must adhere to if she wishes to attain perfection.
- And if you refuse? - An uncut woman cannot marry.
She is considered masculine, unclean.
Sexual urges belong only to the male.
So I am asking you, can you give me an orgasm? That may not be possible.
But this is America.
Anything is possible.
Anything, but not everything.
We can certainly reconstruct your pudenda but as far as rebuilding a clitoris and restoring sensation Well, actually, there is an experimental procedure.
It's called a free flap transfer where we take the tip from one of your toes and attach it to the clitoral area.
But it's only been tried a few times.
The chances for a successful graft aren't optimal.
But if there is even a little chance please, Dr.
McNamara what have I got to lose? I came up with the idea, I'm doing it.
You can assist.
We're talking about microsurgical free-tissue replantation.
It can't look pretty, it's gotta work.
You might be more adept at nerve reattachment but I am a goddamn genius when it comes to pussy.
If I build it, she will come.
Then maybe we should let Liz operate.
She knows more about the clitoris than either of us.
I'm sorry, I meant because you're a woman.
No, I know what you meant.
How can you read this and remain unaffected? Manya Mabika's been hideously disfigured so that a man could use her as a blow-up doll.
Do you think you could chuck your male egos for a sec and pick the best surgeon for the job? Right.
What was I thinking? Okay.
Call it.
Tails.
Congratulations.
You wanna know anything, I'm here for you.
Shit emergency.
Good morning to you, too.
I was down the block having breakfast with my sponsor when I ran out of diapers.
Kid is a feces factory.
He's covered in shit up to his neck.
If this smell doesn't make you think twice before having sex, nothing will.
You hear that, Wilber? Mommy says you smell so bad that she's closing down Fort Bushy.
Good job.
I know.
It's not as much fun as sitting in your own poop but someday you'll be able to pay some beautiful lady to do this to you all day.
Yes, you will.
You're good.
I'm always so nervous when I give him a bath.
If you relax, he'll relax.
Here we go.
Look.
All clean.
What happened? What happened to you? You're all clean all of a sudden.
Come on, my little boy.
There you go.
Okay, come on.
Let's go.
It's cold.
Maybe we should have another one.
One that's both of ours.
That was great.
Mornings are best.
How soon does Annie go to college? I should shower and get going.
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
I hope you're at least fantasizing about me.
Of course.
Except you were younger, taller, and looked a lot like Jude Law.
Excuse me.
I'll leave the two of you alone.
Honey, I was just helping myself to seconds.
I didn't get enough the first time around.
You didn't come with me, did you? I'm just not having orgasms that easily right now.
But it has nothing to do with you.
Wow.
I had no idea you were such a good actress.
I wasn't acting.
It all felt good.
Just not good enough.
I'm sorry.
Maybe I should have told you.
It's me.
I'm off.
It's just a phase.
Maybe you should see someone.
I already have one therapist under my roof.
I don't need another one.
I'm just blocked.
It'll be fine.
All right.
Sorry I'm late.
My son dropped the mother load and then decided to finger-paint with it.
Sounds very special.
I'd love to stay and hear about your son's bowel movement but the patient's been ready for 20 minutes.
It's like I'm addicted to him or something.
He forces me to be in the moment.
You're on your hands and knees, trying to get the stain out of a Chinese rug and the little bastard starts to laugh and that makes you laugh, and then it dawns on you, you're happy.
Something matters.
Wilber matters.
I don't wanna do it.
I can't make her come.
Yes, you can.
Come on, it's a new procedure for us.
- It's natural to be nervous.
- I'm talking about Julia.
I went down on her this morning, and I could have sworn I was in the zone.
- And what, she fell asleep? - No, I caught her finishing what I'd started.
She says she's been faking it for months.
You can understand how I'd be hesitant to reconstruct Ms.
Mabika's genitalia when I have no idea how my own wife's operates.
You ever tried doing the alphabet? With your tongue? - What are you, 12? - Women are right brain.
They're instinctual, intuitive, and, above all, verbal.
You wanna be a successful lover, work on your language skills.
They're a mystery, you know.
I can reconstruct her external parts, maybe even revitalize dying tissue.
But pleasure release, ecstasy All we're doing is maximizing her potential.
She just wants a fighting chance to feel, or at the very least to look like the woman she could've been if she lived in this country instead of some place where men are such pussies they have to neuter their women to get a hard-on.
Let's go build a clitoris.
- What am I gonna do with you? - I think he's had enough.
Come on, Mom.
Five more minutes.
If he doesn't nap, he will be up all night and so will I.
And if I don't sleep, then I can't be my usual sunny self, all right? Good job.
And here is your blankie.
You're a great dad.
Wilber adores you.
I want to adopt him.
I want to be his father legally.
Let's do it tomorrow.
We could check with a lawyer.
We could see how long it takes for all the paperwork to become official.
This is perfect.
This way, you can be the father to both our kids.
It's better for Wilber, and it's better for us.
I didn't say anything about another kid.
I know, but you implied.
Wilber.
I didn't say anything about having another baby.
With me, you mean.
You don't wanna have another kid with me.
Two is a lot more work than one.
I don't think it's the best thing for you either, not in your state.
My state? What are you, a goddamn shrink? Honey, calm down.
The only reason you want another baby is to fill up that void inside of you.
One isn't quite doing it.
Maybe two will.
You're an addict, Gina.
Only this time, instead of craving sex or drugs you're trying to fill that bottomless void with babies.
Listen to me, asshole.
You don't wanna have another baby with me, fine! There are a thousand men who could make a better dad than you.
I could find better spunk off a shit-stained urinal in a strip joint.
- Where are you going? - You can forget about being a father! There is no way in hell I am gonna let you adopt my baby! You're not gonna keep him from me.
I know you're pissed because I won't have another baby with you but you're not taking it out on Wilber.
You're right.
I'm taking it out on you.
Don't test me, Gina.
You'll regret it.
You think you can do this on your own? I don't need your filthy money.
I could get work.
Doing what? You never finished college, you've got no references.
You want me out of the picture? Just say the word.
You can go back to your shitty houseboat.
Fine.
You can have him this Friday, from 6:00 to 9:00.
Take it or leave it.
- You got a hot date? - You might say that.
You can't run away, Elias.
You have to run toward.
I'm sorry.
I changed my mind.
That's okay, Mr.
Perri.
Come back when you're ready.
Mrs.
Perri.
I'm not Elias' wife, Dr.
McNamara.
I'm his life coach.
We're working together to overcome self-defeating patterns that keep him from experiencing self-fulfillment.
That's it, Elias.
Way to go.
I don't want to minimize the trauma of male pattern baldness No.
Forgive me, Mr.
Perri.
I didn't realize.
Were you born with this condition or was it acquired through an illness? This is the way God made me.
Rugged, huh? Smooth as a baby's bottom.
All over.
Mr.
Perri, with alopecia universalis there are no live hair follicles to graft and transplant.
I knew it.
There's nothing anyone can do.
But we could have the lab match you with a donor and do a follicular graft on the pubic and underarm areas and hope the match isn't rejected.
- What if it is? - It'll fall out.
Great.
How am I supposed to get hard if I'm thinking about the hair on my balls falling out? Then don't think about it.
At least you'll have tried.
You didn't just sit back and wait for change to happen.
You demanded it.
Which brings you one step closer to your goal, having more pleasure in life.
- When's your next opening? - Congratulations, Elias.
Why don't you see our receptionist, and she'll check our availability? Thank you.
Excuse me, Ms.
Moore.
Do you have a minute? I'll be with you in a sec.
This is kind of awkward, especially considering I'd never heard of a life coach before you walked in here today.
It's a growing alternative, a good one, I think for those of us who have spent too many years on a couch and still aren't happy.
I was wondering if you had any openings in your schedule.
- I could see you - It's not for me.
I'd like you to talk to my wife.
"I tend to be optimistic.
" Accurate, somewhat accurate, or inaccurate? Somewhat accurate.
I think I did this test the last time I had my roots done.
"I'm physically affectionate.
" Well, I've never been much of a hugger.
She had acute haphephobia till she was 11.
You know, the fear of being touched.
Or didn't they cover that at Life Coach U? - Mother, please.
- Ava doesn't mind a few questions.
After all, she's trying to become your therapist.
I'm not trying to become a therapist.
As a matter of fact, I don't believe in it.
It focuses on the imaginary wounds that keep people from progressing 'cause they're so busy picking at them.
As a practicing therapist with a Ph.
D.
in Clinical Psychology from Columbia let me assure you, the wounds are real and if you pretend they don't exist and slap a bandage on them you'll wind up with a case of pus-oozing gangrene.
- Look, it's getting late - No pus.
- Sorry? - Gangrene occurs from a lack of blood supply to the tissues.
It's anaerobic, so there's no pus.
Or didn't they cover that at Columbia? I guess that took the wind out of my sails.
I'll go study up on pus and leave you girls to your quiz.
- Your mother's a bitch.
- She's having a rough time.
My father Blah, blah, blah.
Get rid of her.
She's a vampire.
She's attached herself to your neck, and she's sucking the life blood out of you.
Listen, I know it's weird, my being introduced by your husband and it's fine if you don't want a life coach but I can't leave until you promise to send her packing.
- She's not your friend.
- I'm her daughter.
You're her blood supply.
It's her or you.
And she's had her turn.
You take care of yourself, okay? Ava I'm willing to give it a go.
You are gonna get more from life than you ever dreamed.
And we're gonna start with that sexual problem of yours.
What are you talking about? Sean told me you couldn't come when he went down on you.
Ms.
Mabika.
How are you today? Well, according to my mother, I am immoral and unclean and have made myself vulnerable to disease, drug use, and promiscuity.
I got the same letter when I went away to college.
I'm gonna take a look, if that's okay with you.
Could you scoot down for me a little bit? That's it.
Just a little further.
There we go.
Okay, I'm gonna stimulate the clitoris and check for blood flow.
Stop me if you feel any discomfort.
It doesn't hurt.
Good.
All right, you can sit up.
You're healing very well.
Can I have sex soon? What's the hurry? Hurry? I've been waiting 10 years.
I think that's very patient.
You might wanna take it slow, not have too many expectations.
I would hate to see you disappointed.
I know what to expect, Doctor.
A man who has lost his sight, he's not without vision.
He's lost the use of his eyes, yes but he still distinguishes shapes and distances in his own way.
The same is true of one's genitalia.
I mean, I have never climaxed, that's true but my body still tingles when I run my fingers lightly up and down my arm or when I caress my breasts and my nipples.
I, too, have vision.
As they say, one who has vision can achieve it.
Dr.
McNamara, he is a great doctor but you, Dr.
Troy I sense in you a true healer.
Are you a true healer, Dr.
Troy? Will you heal me? It doesn't mean that the surgery wasn't successful.
It's still too early to tell.
- It's just not working.
- I don't care how long it takes.
We're both just trying too hard.
Honey, it's not that what you were doing didn't feel good.
It felt great.
It's not a problem you could fix.
I could if you'd let me.
If I could let you, it wouldn't be a problem.
I hope you didn't make lunch plans.
I'm squeezing Manya in at 1:00.
- I think we should both be there.
- You told me she was healing nicely.
I did a follow-up.
She should be experiencing more sensitivity by now.
Maybe the coaptation failed.
We need to explore it.
She was released less than 48 hours ago.
When did you do this follow-up? Yesterday.
Night.
She asked me to.
- To what, be an asshole? - Look, the point is it isn't working, okay? I spent a good 30 minutes doing the entire Gettysburg Address.
In Somali? The procedure is rare.
This has nothing to do with your competence as a surgeon.
Or your technique as a lover.
- Which has a success rate of 100%/%.
- Try 90%/%.
It didn't work with Julia.
I went through the goddamn alphabet three times.
- All I can say is it's always worked for me.
- Till Manya Mabika.
Besides, what makes you so sure the others weren't faking it? Julia had me fooled.
- I can tell the difference.
- No, you can't.
No man can tell.
We'll never really know what gets them off like they'll never know what it's like to have a hard-on.
It's like trying to describe the sky to a blind man.
We're just groping in the dark.
The pubic and axilla areas are marked and prepped.
Just didn't know how low you wanted to graft.
Mr.
Perri, I can't tell you how happy I am that you're a man.
At least I know my way around a penis.
Hit it.
There's no evidence of fibrosis on the smooth muscle tissue of the clitoris or the vaginal wall.
Let us know as soon as you feel something.
If it's too intense Can you feel that? A little.
The way you feel your tooth after the dentist gives you Novocain.
How about that? - Maybe she's not ready yet.
- We should be seeing some signs by now.
Vaginal lubrication, clitoral and labial engorgement.
Excuse me, Doctors, but there is a patient on the other end of that speculum.
Manya, this is a biothesiometer.
It measures the sensitivity of the skin to high and low-frequency vibration.
We use it to determine the sensitivity of the clitoris.
For God's sake.
Listen, do you think Manya and I could have a minute to confer? Absolutely.
Speculum? You know, cells have a memory, and when we've had a trauma our nerves shut down to protect us from re-experiencing the pain.
So you think my body's protecting me from pleasure as well? Before we can let someone touch us there we have to let them touch us here.
Perhaps I'm more afraid than I thought.
You won't be when you find the right lover.
Meet Ms.
Right.
That girl? No.
- She knows nothing about making love.
- She knows you.
What you like what it feels like to have your fingertips rub across your belly around your thighs and into your sacred center.
Feel the energy pulsing through you as you touch and tease yourself back and forth faster and slower harder and softer.
We have to remember we're treating a human being, not just a vagina.
It's easy to forget after a year with Vagina Gina.
Houston, we have liftoff.
She rubbed her magic lantern, and set the genie free.
Congratulations, Doctor.
Wow.
I feel like I should be congratulating you.
You connected the circuitry, I just helped her turn it on.
She's waiting for you.
She'd like to say thanks.
Don't let this crush your ego.
You can't win them all.
She told me you tried.
I was appalled until she told me she asked.
I didn't know she was gay.
Because you didn't get her off, she must be gay? You really have no idea what goes on inside a woman.
You know, I think I've been inside enough of them to have some idea.
Evolve a little, why don't you? You wanna get inside of a woman, stop thinking like a dick.
Sorry, I Liz told me everything was - I can come back another time.
- No.
Please stay.
It was so beautiful.
Well, I'm glad you're happy.
It's natural to feel emotional after experiencing a release.
A release? Yes, it was.
It was like God was waking up inside of me.
I've never heard it described quite like that.
At first, I was afraid.
It was as they said.
I was protecting myself but then such joy.
The body's incredibly resilient.
It is nothing compared to the soul.
Now, anything is possible.
Even forgiveness.
I forgive them, Dr.
McNamara.
I forgive them all.
I'm whole now.
I'm free.
Now watch Mommy's face.
Flowers are magic.
As soon as a woman sees them, she forgets all about how angry she is.
Smart.
Start them young.
You gonna watch Daddy park the pink bus in the fur garage? She is one cranky hot bitch.
You wait here, little buddy.
Daddy'll be right back.
- What the hell are you doing? - You're early.
God, I thought you were taking Wilber to the zoo and then to dinner.
Come already.
Get the hell out of here.
- I said get your shit and get out of here! - Cool off, man.
Thank you for your deposit, Gil.
What are you, on drugs? You organized your own gangbang? They are my gang, asshole, from Sexaholics Anonymous.
It's a good cause.
They volunteered.
To do what? Jump off the wagon and onto you? It's called heterospermic insemination.
It's the surest way to get pregnant.
The more partners, the more sperm the more competitive the little bastards are to come in first.
Wilber's gonna have a brother with or without you.
You are so goddamn sick.
What is your problem, asshole? They've all been tested.
There's not so much as a herpes in the bunch.
- What do you think you're doing? - I'm getting Wilber out of here.
You've got no right.
There is no biological or legal connection between the two of you, and there's no law against having sex with multiple partners or you would be on death row.
Right.
When I sue you for custody, you be sure to say that! He's blissed out.
Great, huh, buddy? It's what's called maternal instinct.
I didn't know where else to go.
It's been a long time since I've held a baby like this.
Brings back all those nights with Matt and Annie.
That silent communication.
So uncomplicated.
So intimate.
Sometimes feels more intimate than anything else.
Maybe you could help me with him.
Just until this thing with Gina is resolved, until I get custody.
- What if you don't? - I will.
No judge is gonna deem her competent.
I think it would be great for Wilber to have someone like you in his life someone so nurturing.
I don't know.
Whenever I'm out, and I see parents my age with babies I just feel relief.
It's too much work.
- I've already done it twice.
- Not with me.
It could be fun, raising a kid together.
What about Sean? You mean Uncle Sean? - He'll be part of the family, too.
- I thought I heard a baby.
Isn't he adorable? Darling, I hope you don't mind my borrowing your sweater.
I needed color to accent my face.
My editor's taking me out to lunch.
I didn't realize doctors still made house calls.
- How nice of you, Christian.
- Hello, Erica.
How are you healing? Beautifully.
Like it never happened.
This must be Wilber.
- Your girlfriend's baby.
- He's mine.
Yes, I can see the resemblance.
Don't let him fall asleep with that bottle.
He'll start depending on it.
- Maybe he finds it comforting.
- He should learn to fall asleep on his own.
He'll be more self-reliant without a crutch.
You know what? I'd be happy to help you.
- Call whenever you need me.
- Help him what? I just asked Julia to help me take care of Wilber.
Isn't that nice, sweetheart? It'll be like giving it another shot.
There he is.
Hey.
Mommy misses you.
Mommy loves you.
Yeah.
What the hell do you want? There's someone I thought you should meet.
Christian Troy, James Sutherland.
Wilber's father.
His real one.
Frances gave the galleys of my book to The New York Times.
Apparently, they loved it.
You're pouting.
Are you angry because I think you're making a mistake? What mistake am I making this time, Mother? I'll add it to the list.
The one where you insist on putting everyone else's needs ahead of your own.
- Aren't you getting bored with it? - I don't do that.
Volunteering to take care of Christian's child.
- I happen to have the time.
- No, you don't.
When are you going to step it up, darling? Do you think sacrificing your potential for Christian's bastard is in your best interests? You don't give a shit about my best interests.
All you think about is yourself.
Don't give me that patronizing look.
I'm not one of your patients.
I am not to blame for the way your life has turned out.
You never wanted me to succeed, did you? It's too much competition.
Is that why I pushed you to have a career to put off marriage till you'd established yourself? Because I was competitive? Is that all you care about? How big my career is? God, Mother, when you look at me, is that all you see, what I'm not? - You disappoint me, Julia.
- Consistency's what counts.
I raised you to confront your feelings honestly to tell the truth about yourself to yourself.
The truth according to you, Mother! You wanna hear my truth? You won't let me succeed if you haven't.
I can't be in a loving relationship when yours failed so miserably.
I can't possibly have raised children who love me when yours can't stand you! Is that why you're in love with Christian? Because your marriage is succeeding so brilliantly? - What? - Come on.
I saw how you looked at him.
Why else would you wanna raise the child? Because you loved mothering the first time around? He's been one of my closest friends for over 20 years.
And you've been in love with him for all this time.
Hey.
Christian call you? He had some question he wanted to ask you about Wilber.
I don't know how he's gonna manage on his own.
- What's going on? - Nothing except that my mother is leaving tonight.
- Are you sure you - She doesn't have a say in the matter.
I want her out.
I think it is for the best.
Unless Sean would like to hear what we're talking about.
I'm sure he would be interested.
I'm not.
Whatever problems Julia's having with you are hers to solve.
All I can do is support her and drive you to the airport.
No faking it that time, huh? No.
That was extraordinary.
Ava was right.
I came when my mother went.
Boy, it was like something inside you just woke up.
I've never heard you so free.
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