Porn and Ice Cream (2022) s02e03 Episode Script
Legs!
1
A truck is coming!
Pablo, don't cross!
Watch out, Pablo!
Pablo!
Pablo!
You have realized
You're just a creep
Come on, Harry!
You look in the mirror
And want to scream
If you feel abandoned and grim
You will always have
Porn and ice cream
Porn
I am a Feeble-Minded.
You're cool anyway.
I'm a Feeble-Minded.
Porn and ice cream
No!
No!
No!
Porn and ice cream
Come on.
Everybody get in the car.
Get in, come on. Get in.
-Get in. Pablo, get in.
-Harry, start the car.
Open up for me.
Hey! Open up!
Sorry, dude. I can't take
more than three passengers.
I helped you escape. They'll kill me.
You're putting me in a hard spot,
I'm working.
The Rolingas will kill me.
They'll kill me. Please, open up.
I helped you a lot.
Don't look.
PORN AND ICE CREAM
You poor things, you must be starving.
We had breakfast
at a gas station on our way back.
-Here.
-Where was it?
Dieguito had it.
See? I told you so!
What happened to Dieguito?
He signed with Manu Music
and put out some solo albums.
Some of them are okay.
I liked his lysergic phase.
I liked his folk album more.
So what's he doing now?
He quit music
and is studying mechanical engineering.
There's not enough for four.
I don't want any pastries.
I'm here to get paid for all these trips.
I'm just kidding. Here, help yourself.
Harry, can't you tell
we're traumatized by what happened?
Look at Ramón, he's in shock.
No, I'm fine. I'm chilling.
You're in shock, Ramón, remember?
No, Pablo. I was a while ago,
but now I'm great.
Harry, we can't pay this debt!
What were you thinking?
That I'd drive you everywhere for free?
I take you twice a week to a hair salon
and you have me wait for 90 minutes.
My bangs grow so fast!
Excuse me, I'm not paying
whatever debt she racked up.
Sorry? Who did we pick up
in the middle of nowhere?
All right, Harry,
maybe we could work something out,
like a payment plan.
You've got 48 hours.
-Harry, that's too little time.
-What?
A week.
You say one week
-One week.
-Okay.
He forgot his gun!
I'm full up this week.
Monday is a tribute to Sabina.
Tuesday, bands that don't know Sabina.
Wednesday, Sabina plays.
Thursday, bands under 30.
That's it! We could play
with the bands under 30.
No, Pablo isn't under 30.
He is mentally.
-What are you doing?
-The trash helps the atmosphere.
Kids today are too ecological,
they throw everything in the bin.
Sandro, we need a gig,
we owe a ton of money.
The only thing I can think of
is for you guys to play
at the leg transplant festival.
Is there any money?
-A ton of money.
-Perfect.
You got a leg-themed set?
-Set?
-Yeah.
Yeah, I had a set, not a run.
All right.
-Did you just win?
-That's right, kid.
You owe us seven grand.
You've got one week.
Why is it always a week?
Good news, I got you a gig.
Bad news,
we're in debt with other taxi drivers.
Harry said we should save up.
We can't keep spending.
-We're going broke.
-What about those headphones?
A little treat for myself.
They're noise cancelling.
-Noise cancelling?
-Noise cancelling?
You have to come up
with leg-related songs for the gig.
Legs?
Ceci, you can't just tell us
what to write.
You can't condition inspiration.
It's not that easy.
You
Your hair shimmered
Under the sun's soft gaze
-How much is this?
-Eighty.
-You got a smaller bill?
-I've got nothing.
You
And your smile laughed louder
Than the sea's ballet
-Perfect.
-Great.
You could use the change.
Wanna keep this
and just give me a thousand bill?
-All right.
-Better, right?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
You
And your ears danced
To the melody's sway
Ceci. Ceci!
Sorry, the noise cancelling was on.
Be right back.
Hey!
I saw that, you short-changed her.
-What do you mean?
-You gave her 500 and kept 1,000.
I have her 580.
I gotta say, that was very elegantly done.
Thank you.
-I'm Ceci.
-I'm Clau.
Been a while since saw a snack like you.
-I mean a sneak thief.
-Excuse me, I'm no thief.
Wanna see a thief?
Those two, waiting for someone
carrying a briefcase on the street side.
That one. Freely picking pockets.
Him. Dressed for the occasion.
Those two. Not even hiding it.
And that one. Completely insane.
Thieves, pickpockets, swindlers,
sticky fingers, five-finger discount,
eenie meenie miny moe,
catch a tiger by the toe.
They're there, but you don't see them.
They do stand out a lot.
Yeah, this corner is kinda dicey.
Let's get outta here.
And I ended up scoring about $300,000.
Where's all that money?
In my uncle's, at Chascomús.
That's why the key to a good con is
Wait, hold on!
Are you trying to explain cons to me?
I'm a professional hustler, honey.
I can steal anything from anyone.
Is that right?
Let's see.
Steal from that guy.
-Him?
-Yeah.
Very easy.
-Too easy.
-Go on.
-Are you gonna do it?
-I am.
All right, do it.
-I'm gonna.
-Are you?
-Can't you see I'm going?
-So go.
-Excuse me, sir.
-Yes?
-Do you have the time?
-Sure.
-It's a quarter past 3:00.
-Perfect, thanks.
Need anything else?
I sure could use one of those.
-That would be great, huh?
-Yeah, really great.
-I should get back to work.
-Of course.
-Be careful! Are you okay?
-Yeah.
-You are?
-Thank you so much. Sorry.
You're welcome.
That was okay. I mean
I was expecting something more
It's okay. You have potential.
-You really do.
-Potential?
-I meant
-That's great.
-What a relief!
-The thing is
Here you go, big boss.
Get yourself something nice.
That's $3.
I've been thinking about leg-themed songs.
But all the lyrics get a little erotic.
I started putting together a song.
It's a very limited subject.
We should be able
to write about something else.
I'll tell Ceci to ask Sandro
if we can write
about other parts of the body.
Kneeling before you, I stay
Frills in the darkness play
Unfolding intermittent light
Long legs converse in delight
A book revealing secrets untold
Your clothes gracefully unfold
In that joyous moment, I find
A reason to live
A reason to live
I wish an athlete of love I was
Legs come and legs go
In between, a captivating show
Legs come and go
In between, a captivating show
What do you think?
I think
it's awful.
Right? Kinda lame.
Ramón.
Ramón.
-What's up?
-Are you okay?
Horacio, do you think I've got talent?
Sure you do. You're a great employee.
You arrive early, you meet your goals,
you build amazing displays.
I'm not talking about that.
I meant artistic talent.
Art is overrated, Ramón.
Let me tell you a story.
Many years ago, I went to an art school.
I was the best in class.
My work was showcased
at Palais de Glace, the Malba,
Venice Biennale, Ruth Benzacar.
All the bells and whistles.
But I was fucking broke.
My friends were employees
and they went out to eat all the time,
while I stayed in,
painting and eating rice.
Until one day I said, "Enough!"
I sent my résumé to Construcasa
and I haven't cooked since.
I just order all the time.
Did you know that eating too much rice
can cause hemorrhoids?
That was a painful surgery.
Thank you, Horacio.
You're welcome, kid.
You should come over sometime.
We'll order some ceviche.
Be honest, was that orgasm real?
Because I'm not sure if I can trust you.
Look, I'd say I've got cancer
to skip out on a birthday party,
but I'd never fake an orgasm.
-Can you open the door?
-Don't you wanna stay the night?
You don't have to play boyfriend.
We're both grown-ups.
We know we'll never meet again,
and that's fine.
-Come on, show me out.
-But why?
I'd like to see you again,
and I'd like you to stay.
Spare me all this, all right?
I'm not an idiot.
I was there and back before you even left.
Besides, we just met.
We vibed, had the best sex in our lives.
We're compatible in every way,
and you want me to stay over? Moron!
Don't you give me that face.
Those eyes. I am perfectly fine by myself.
-Got it? I
-Yeah.
-What?
-Come here.
Some legs are hairy
And some are not
They need a hairdresser like I do
Some run, jump and dance
While others don't
Some play soccer, tennis
Or ping-pong
Well, it could work.
-It's not bad.
-It's horrible.
Yeah, it's lame.
I was working on a song.
Really? Great, let's hear it.
My girl, so little
Has me captivated
Her tiny legs
Her hurried steps
When I pick her up from school
-No.
-No!
What are those lyrics?
It's about my daughter, Almendra.
She's bow-legged.
-She's lovely.
-She really is. So what do we do?
-I've got a song
-No. It's bad.
Let's hear it, maybe we can fix it.
No, let's not waste our time.
I'd rather cancel the gig
than play that live.
Hey, it's not that bad.
Yes, it is.
Ramón, are you angry at me?
Did I do something?
No. Everything is fine.
I love you and you're my best friend.
Oh, okay. I love you, too.
Let's call it a day.
All right.
-Are you okay, kid?
-Yeah, why?
I don't know, you look different.
-What's up with you?
-I'm the same as always.
I know what's going on. You're in love.
What? No way.
-She's in love!
-She's in love!
She's in love!
Are you absent-minded and clumsy?
Maybe
Did you forget to have lunch and dinner?
Maybe
You find all his jokes are funny
They're good, aren't day?
Do you have a few hundred to spare?
It's not love, it's just momentary heat
A fleeting feeling that won't repeat
Take responsibility, shorty
Denying it won't help
You're in love
You're in love
Stop fucking around, please
Am I in love?
You're a bitch, Tana, a bitch.
Speak up. I thought you had another
Why don't you answer the phone?
-Sorry.
-Hi.
I made tiramisu.
Yummy.
I brought
some chocolate cake my brother made.
I love chocolate cake, it's my favorite.
Thanks, Pablo.
Pablo's stuff is always better, huh?
-Hey there.
-How are you? You must be Ramón.
-Yeah. Nice to meet you.
-Same. Claudio.
-Claudio, a pleasure.
-Claudio?
-My dad's called Claudio.
-Yeah. You're Pablo.
-Yes.
-What's up?
Listen up.
Take care of that girl.
No, she can take care of herself.
The chicken giblets were great.
Thank you, Ramón.
Pablo, I would've made something else
if I knew you were vegetarian.
Wasn't it just pork
you had an issue with, Pablo?
Where do you think
chicken comes from, huh?
There are no more plates.
We'll have to eat from containers.
All right.
How did you guys meet?
That's a great story.
-Ceci tried to con me.
-Really? How?
It wasn't a con, Ramón.
I tried to get him into a pyramid scheme.
I ended up giving her $800.
-But I gave it back.
-Yeah.
What did you do with the $800?
Nothing, it's at home.
-In the sock drawer, right?
-How did you know?
To the prettiest woman
in all of Buenos Aires.
And to the sexiest man on the planet.
Ceci, toast to your boyfriend, not me.
That's not funny, Pablo. Not funny.
-No.
-To Ceci and Clau.
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
INCOMING CALL
UNKNOWN
-Hello?
-Ramón.
Yeah?
-We've got Pablo.
-What?
We kidnapped Pablo.
No!
To free him, you have to pay us $800.
That's exactly
the amount of dollars I have!
Perfect. Put it in a black trash bag
and throw it in the bin outside your door,
or you'll never see your friend again.
Legs come and go
In between, a captivating show
You're a genius, Ramón.
The most talented of all.
I'm glad that Pablo was killed.
No.
Hi! Yes!
Did we get cut off?
Yeah, the reception is bad.
Yeah, cell phone providers are thieves.
-Totally.
-Well, you've got half an hour.
Pablo!
-What's up, Ramón?
-Are you okay?
Yeah. Why are you being nice to me now?
Did they do anything? Beat you up?
Who, my folks?
They called me
and said you'd been kidnapped.
As far as I know, I wasn't kidnapped.
I'm an idiot.
-They stole $800 from me.
-Who, my folks?
I'm sorry, Pablo, I was jealous.
Because the song you wrote
is the most beautiful in the world.
And I don't think I'll ever write
a song like that in my life.
Maybe. But you don't have to be jealous.
We're a band.
It doesn't matter who writes it.
It'll always have both our names on it.
Like Pablo and Pachu used to do.
Thanks, Pablo.
-Oh, yeah. Yeah, there.
-There?
A little lower. There.
The things you see
when you're under house arrest.
Fucking shit.
I haven't written the chorus yet.
Will you give me a hand?
Sure.
-Hey, Sandro.
-Hi, Ceci.
I filed a report with the police,
but they told me
I'm unlikely to get the money back.
Police? What happened?
Ramón got a call,
they said Pablo had been kidnapped.
They took $800.
-I'll be back!
-Where are you going?
We're playing in a bit.
-I got a
-What?
A female emergency!
-Oh, feminism.
-Feminism.
What are you looking for?
What am I looking for? The
Oh, my God.
Looking for Ramón's money?
How could you scam my friend?
Are you nuts?
I don't care about anyone but you,
I told you that.
Well, I do care about my friends.
Give me the money.
Give me the money!
Damn it.
I bought two tickets to Mexico.
I want to start a new life there,
by ourselves.
-We leave in two hours.
-Two hours? That's tight.
I always leave three hours before.
To get through customs without hurrying,
check out the duty-free shop
No.
What am I saying? I can't leave.
I've got a band here, a life.
-I manage a band!
-Hold on.
Imagine the two of us in the Caribbean.
Scamming tourists together.
Spending all day at the beach.
Eating quesadillas.
Watching El Chavo.
Professor Jirafales.
-"Please go ahead."
-"After you."
"Shut up, you're driving me crazy!"
"You just don't have any patience."
"Gossip! Gossip!"
Okay.
"That's it."
I want to apologize
To Jaime Roos
To Jaime Roos
Because
Because he once told me
Don't fall in love with anyone
Don't fall in love with anyone
Don't fall in love with anyone
These people dance funny.
They're happy
because they received leg transplants.
Oh, right!
Don't fall in love with anyone
TODAY AT THE INCESTUOUS
THE FEEBLE-MINDED
-This light is taking forever, right?
-Forever!
Stop!
What's wrong?
I can't move to Mexico with you.
Ceci
It's the first time
I feel something like this for anyone.
Me too,
but I can't just leave everything behind.
My life is here.
All right.
TODAY AT THE INCESTUOUS
THE FEEBLE-MINDED
Kneeling before you, I stay
Frills in the darkness play
Unfolding intermittent light
Long legs converse in delight
A book revealing secrets untold
Your clothes gracefully unfold
And in that joyous moment
I discover the reason to live
The reason to live
I want to become an athlete of love
Legs come and legs go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and legs go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and go
And they entertain each other
A truck is coming!
Pablo, don't cross!
Watch out, Pablo!
Pablo!
Pablo!
You have realized
You're just a creep
Come on, Harry!
You look in the mirror
And want to scream
If you feel abandoned and grim
You will always have
Porn and ice cream
Porn
I am a Feeble-Minded.
You're cool anyway.
I'm a Feeble-Minded.
Porn and ice cream
No!
No!
No!
Porn and ice cream
Come on.
Everybody get in the car.
Get in, come on. Get in.
-Get in. Pablo, get in.
-Harry, start the car.
Open up for me.
Hey! Open up!
Sorry, dude. I can't take
more than three passengers.
I helped you escape. They'll kill me.
You're putting me in a hard spot,
I'm working.
The Rolingas will kill me.
They'll kill me. Please, open up.
I helped you a lot.
Don't look.
PORN AND ICE CREAM
You poor things, you must be starving.
We had breakfast
at a gas station on our way back.
-Here.
-Where was it?
Dieguito had it.
See? I told you so!
What happened to Dieguito?
He signed with Manu Music
and put out some solo albums.
Some of them are okay.
I liked his lysergic phase.
I liked his folk album more.
So what's he doing now?
He quit music
and is studying mechanical engineering.
There's not enough for four.
I don't want any pastries.
I'm here to get paid for all these trips.
I'm just kidding. Here, help yourself.
Harry, can't you tell
we're traumatized by what happened?
Look at Ramón, he's in shock.
No, I'm fine. I'm chilling.
You're in shock, Ramón, remember?
No, Pablo. I was a while ago,
but now I'm great.
Harry, we can't pay this debt!
What were you thinking?
That I'd drive you everywhere for free?
I take you twice a week to a hair salon
and you have me wait for 90 minutes.
My bangs grow so fast!
Excuse me, I'm not paying
whatever debt she racked up.
Sorry? Who did we pick up
in the middle of nowhere?
All right, Harry,
maybe we could work something out,
like a payment plan.
You've got 48 hours.
-Harry, that's too little time.
-What?
A week.
You say one week
-One week.
-Okay.
He forgot his gun!
I'm full up this week.
Monday is a tribute to Sabina.
Tuesday, bands that don't know Sabina.
Wednesday, Sabina plays.
Thursday, bands under 30.
That's it! We could play
with the bands under 30.
No, Pablo isn't under 30.
He is mentally.
-What are you doing?
-The trash helps the atmosphere.
Kids today are too ecological,
they throw everything in the bin.
Sandro, we need a gig,
we owe a ton of money.
The only thing I can think of
is for you guys to play
at the leg transplant festival.
Is there any money?
-A ton of money.
-Perfect.
You got a leg-themed set?
-Set?
-Yeah.
Yeah, I had a set, not a run.
All right.
-Did you just win?
-That's right, kid.
You owe us seven grand.
You've got one week.
Why is it always a week?
Good news, I got you a gig.
Bad news,
we're in debt with other taxi drivers.
Harry said we should save up.
We can't keep spending.
-We're going broke.
-What about those headphones?
A little treat for myself.
They're noise cancelling.
-Noise cancelling?
-Noise cancelling?
You have to come up
with leg-related songs for the gig.
Legs?
Ceci, you can't just tell us
what to write.
You can't condition inspiration.
It's not that easy.
You
Your hair shimmered
Under the sun's soft gaze
-How much is this?
-Eighty.
-You got a smaller bill?
-I've got nothing.
You
And your smile laughed louder
Than the sea's ballet
-Perfect.
-Great.
You could use the change.
Wanna keep this
and just give me a thousand bill?
-All right.
-Better, right?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
You
And your ears danced
To the melody's sway
Ceci. Ceci!
Sorry, the noise cancelling was on.
Be right back.
Hey!
I saw that, you short-changed her.
-What do you mean?
-You gave her 500 and kept 1,000.
I have her 580.
I gotta say, that was very elegantly done.
Thank you.
-I'm Ceci.
-I'm Clau.
Been a while since saw a snack like you.
-I mean a sneak thief.
-Excuse me, I'm no thief.
Wanna see a thief?
Those two, waiting for someone
carrying a briefcase on the street side.
That one. Freely picking pockets.
Him. Dressed for the occasion.
Those two. Not even hiding it.
And that one. Completely insane.
Thieves, pickpockets, swindlers,
sticky fingers, five-finger discount,
eenie meenie miny moe,
catch a tiger by the toe.
They're there, but you don't see them.
They do stand out a lot.
Yeah, this corner is kinda dicey.
Let's get outta here.
And I ended up scoring about $300,000.
Where's all that money?
In my uncle's, at Chascomús.
That's why the key to a good con is
Wait, hold on!
Are you trying to explain cons to me?
I'm a professional hustler, honey.
I can steal anything from anyone.
Is that right?
Let's see.
Steal from that guy.
-Him?
-Yeah.
Very easy.
-Too easy.
-Go on.
-Are you gonna do it?
-I am.
All right, do it.
-I'm gonna.
-Are you?
-Can't you see I'm going?
-So go.
-Excuse me, sir.
-Yes?
-Do you have the time?
-Sure.
-It's a quarter past 3:00.
-Perfect, thanks.
Need anything else?
I sure could use one of those.
-That would be great, huh?
-Yeah, really great.
-I should get back to work.
-Of course.
-Be careful! Are you okay?
-Yeah.
-You are?
-Thank you so much. Sorry.
You're welcome.
That was okay. I mean
I was expecting something more
It's okay. You have potential.
-You really do.
-Potential?
-I meant
-That's great.
-What a relief!
-The thing is
Here you go, big boss.
Get yourself something nice.
That's $3.
I've been thinking about leg-themed songs.
But all the lyrics get a little erotic.
I started putting together a song.
It's a very limited subject.
We should be able
to write about something else.
I'll tell Ceci to ask Sandro
if we can write
about other parts of the body.
Kneeling before you, I stay
Frills in the darkness play
Unfolding intermittent light
Long legs converse in delight
A book revealing secrets untold
Your clothes gracefully unfold
In that joyous moment, I find
A reason to live
A reason to live
I wish an athlete of love I was
Legs come and legs go
In between, a captivating show
Legs come and go
In between, a captivating show
What do you think?
I think
it's awful.
Right? Kinda lame.
Ramón.
Ramón.
-What's up?
-Are you okay?
Horacio, do you think I've got talent?
Sure you do. You're a great employee.
You arrive early, you meet your goals,
you build amazing displays.
I'm not talking about that.
I meant artistic talent.
Art is overrated, Ramón.
Let me tell you a story.
Many years ago, I went to an art school.
I was the best in class.
My work was showcased
at Palais de Glace, the Malba,
Venice Biennale, Ruth Benzacar.
All the bells and whistles.
But I was fucking broke.
My friends were employees
and they went out to eat all the time,
while I stayed in,
painting and eating rice.
Until one day I said, "Enough!"
I sent my résumé to Construcasa
and I haven't cooked since.
I just order all the time.
Did you know that eating too much rice
can cause hemorrhoids?
That was a painful surgery.
Thank you, Horacio.
You're welcome, kid.
You should come over sometime.
We'll order some ceviche.
Be honest, was that orgasm real?
Because I'm not sure if I can trust you.
Look, I'd say I've got cancer
to skip out on a birthday party,
but I'd never fake an orgasm.
-Can you open the door?
-Don't you wanna stay the night?
You don't have to play boyfriend.
We're both grown-ups.
We know we'll never meet again,
and that's fine.
-Come on, show me out.
-But why?
I'd like to see you again,
and I'd like you to stay.
Spare me all this, all right?
I'm not an idiot.
I was there and back before you even left.
Besides, we just met.
We vibed, had the best sex in our lives.
We're compatible in every way,
and you want me to stay over? Moron!
Don't you give me that face.
Those eyes. I am perfectly fine by myself.
-Got it? I
-Yeah.
-What?
-Come here.
Some legs are hairy
And some are not
They need a hairdresser like I do
Some run, jump and dance
While others don't
Some play soccer, tennis
Or ping-pong
Well, it could work.
-It's not bad.
-It's horrible.
Yeah, it's lame.
I was working on a song.
Really? Great, let's hear it.
My girl, so little
Has me captivated
Her tiny legs
Her hurried steps
When I pick her up from school
-No.
-No!
What are those lyrics?
It's about my daughter, Almendra.
She's bow-legged.
-She's lovely.
-She really is. So what do we do?
-I've got a song
-No. It's bad.
Let's hear it, maybe we can fix it.
No, let's not waste our time.
I'd rather cancel the gig
than play that live.
Hey, it's not that bad.
Yes, it is.
Ramón, are you angry at me?
Did I do something?
No. Everything is fine.
I love you and you're my best friend.
Oh, okay. I love you, too.
Let's call it a day.
All right.
-Are you okay, kid?
-Yeah, why?
I don't know, you look different.
-What's up with you?
-I'm the same as always.
I know what's going on. You're in love.
What? No way.
-She's in love!
-She's in love!
She's in love!
Are you absent-minded and clumsy?
Maybe
Did you forget to have lunch and dinner?
Maybe
You find all his jokes are funny
They're good, aren't day?
Do you have a few hundred to spare?
It's not love, it's just momentary heat
A fleeting feeling that won't repeat
Take responsibility, shorty
Denying it won't help
You're in love
You're in love
Stop fucking around, please
Am I in love?
You're a bitch, Tana, a bitch.
Speak up. I thought you had another
Why don't you answer the phone?
-Sorry.
-Hi.
I made tiramisu.
Yummy.
I brought
some chocolate cake my brother made.
I love chocolate cake, it's my favorite.
Thanks, Pablo.
Pablo's stuff is always better, huh?
-Hey there.
-How are you? You must be Ramón.
-Yeah. Nice to meet you.
-Same. Claudio.
-Claudio, a pleasure.
-Claudio?
-My dad's called Claudio.
-Yeah. You're Pablo.
-Yes.
-What's up?
Listen up.
Take care of that girl.
No, she can take care of herself.
The chicken giblets were great.
Thank you, Ramón.
Pablo, I would've made something else
if I knew you were vegetarian.
Wasn't it just pork
you had an issue with, Pablo?
Where do you think
chicken comes from, huh?
There are no more plates.
We'll have to eat from containers.
All right.
How did you guys meet?
That's a great story.
-Ceci tried to con me.
-Really? How?
It wasn't a con, Ramón.
I tried to get him into a pyramid scheme.
I ended up giving her $800.
-But I gave it back.
-Yeah.
What did you do with the $800?
Nothing, it's at home.
-In the sock drawer, right?
-How did you know?
To the prettiest woman
in all of Buenos Aires.
And to the sexiest man on the planet.
Ceci, toast to your boyfriend, not me.
That's not funny, Pablo. Not funny.
-No.
-To Ceci and Clau.
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
INCOMING CALL
UNKNOWN
-Hello?
-Ramón.
Yeah?
-We've got Pablo.
-What?
We kidnapped Pablo.
No!
To free him, you have to pay us $800.
That's exactly
the amount of dollars I have!
Perfect. Put it in a black trash bag
and throw it in the bin outside your door,
or you'll never see your friend again.
Legs come and go
In between, a captivating show
You're a genius, Ramón.
The most talented of all.
I'm glad that Pablo was killed.
No.
Hi! Yes!
Did we get cut off?
Yeah, the reception is bad.
Yeah, cell phone providers are thieves.
-Totally.
-Well, you've got half an hour.
Pablo!
-What's up, Ramón?
-Are you okay?
Yeah. Why are you being nice to me now?
Did they do anything? Beat you up?
Who, my folks?
They called me
and said you'd been kidnapped.
As far as I know, I wasn't kidnapped.
I'm an idiot.
-They stole $800 from me.
-Who, my folks?
I'm sorry, Pablo, I was jealous.
Because the song you wrote
is the most beautiful in the world.
And I don't think I'll ever write
a song like that in my life.
Maybe. But you don't have to be jealous.
We're a band.
It doesn't matter who writes it.
It'll always have both our names on it.
Like Pablo and Pachu used to do.
Thanks, Pablo.
-Oh, yeah. Yeah, there.
-There?
A little lower. There.
The things you see
when you're under house arrest.
Fucking shit.
I haven't written the chorus yet.
Will you give me a hand?
Sure.
-Hey, Sandro.
-Hi, Ceci.
I filed a report with the police,
but they told me
I'm unlikely to get the money back.
Police? What happened?
Ramón got a call,
they said Pablo had been kidnapped.
They took $800.
-I'll be back!
-Where are you going?
We're playing in a bit.
-I got a
-What?
A female emergency!
-Oh, feminism.
-Feminism.
What are you looking for?
What am I looking for? The
Oh, my God.
Looking for Ramón's money?
How could you scam my friend?
Are you nuts?
I don't care about anyone but you,
I told you that.
Well, I do care about my friends.
Give me the money.
Give me the money!
Damn it.
I bought two tickets to Mexico.
I want to start a new life there,
by ourselves.
-We leave in two hours.
-Two hours? That's tight.
I always leave three hours before.
To get through customs without hurrying,
check out the duty-free shop
No.
What am I saying? I can't leave.
I've got a band here, a life.
-I manage a band!
-Hold on.
Imagine the two of us in the Caribbean.
Scamming tourists together.
Spending all day at the beach.
Eating quesadillas.
Watching El Chavo.
Professor Jirafales.
-"Please go ahead."
-"After you."
"Shut up, you're driving me crazy!"
"You just don't have any patience."
"Gossip! Gossip!"
Okay.
"That's it."
I want to apologize
To Jaime Roos
To Jaime Roos
Because
Because he once told me
Don't fall in love with anyone
Don't fall in love with anyone
Don't fall in love with anyone
These people dance funny.
They're happy
because they received leg transplants.
Oh, right!
Don't fall in love with anyone
TODAY AT THE INCESTUOUS
THE FEEBLE-MINDED
-This light is taking forever, right?
-Forever!
Stop!
What's wrong?
I can't move to Mexico with you.
Ceci
It's the first time
I feel something like this for anyone.
Me too,
but I can't just leave everything behind.
My life is here.
All right.
TODAY AT THE INCESTUOUS
THE FEEBLE-MINDED
Kneeling before you, I stay
Frills in the darkness play
Unfolding intermittent light
Long legs converse in delight
A book revealing secrets untold
Your clothes gracefully unfold
And in that joyous moment
I discover the reason to live
The reason to live
I want to become an athlete of love
Legs come and legs go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and legs go
And they entertain each other
Legs come and go
And they entertain each other