Red Oaks (2014) s02e03 Episode Script

1 [alarm ringing.]
[ringing continues.]
All right, all right.
- [ringing stops.]
- [grunts.]
♫ ♫ ["It Don't Matter To Me" by Bread plays.]
♫ It don't matter to me ♫ ♫ If you take up with someone ♫ ♫ Who's better than me ♫ ♫ 'Cause your happiness is all I want ♫ ♫ For you to find ♫ ♫ Your piece of mind ♫ ♫ It don't matter to me ♫ ♫ It don't matter to me ♫ ♫ 'Cause there'll always be an empty room ♫ ♫ Waiting for you ♫ ♫ An open heart ♫ - [utensil tapping.]
- Honey, you want some bacon? It's not actually bacon.
It's this stuff, Sizzlean, that my doctor wants me to eat.
I wonder if it's kosher.
No, it's not.
♫ 'Cause it don't matter to me ♫ It's not kosher.
It's, uh Pork is the first ingredient.
Dude, fuck NYU.
You don't need them.
Plenty of cool directors never went to film school, like Kubrick and, um - Kurosawa.
- Exactly.
And that's just the K's.
- Mm-hmm.
I don't know, I can't help thinking maybe it's a sign, like I'm wasting my time, fooling myself.
I mean, let's face it, just 'cause I like movies and screwing around with video cameras and Super-8 doesn't make me Spielberg.
Maybe it's time I face facts and move on like you have with Misty.
I didn't really have a choice.
- Still.
- [sighs.]
Man, our lives really suck balls.
All right, I gotta get going.
What are you wearing? Figured it would help me get into character.
I shaved three times this morning.
[mirror clicks.]
Shit.
Sorry, dude.
Do you ever regret dropping out of college? [sighs.]
Sometimes.
I mean, if I hadn't, Misty would probably respect me more now.
Then again, I probably wouldn't be working at Red Oaks, and she and I wouldn't have become friends in the first place.
Wish me luck.
[exhales.]
[school bell rings.]
Man: Next.
Sorry.
- Name.
- Levine, Zachary.
Registration and I.
D.
, please.
It says here you weigh 145 pounds.
Yeah, I'm a big stress eater.
- [stamps.]
- Next.
[sighs.]
Name.
I've got to give you credit, boychick.
Most of my assistants over the years have been young men of limited ambition who were content to set their romantic sights on lowly maids and massage therapists.
But not you.
No.
You went and bagged the president's daughter.
- It's not like that.
- Bup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
Don't apologize.
It's inspiring.
In fact, it's made me realize I've been setting my own sights too low.
I deserve to be with a higher class of woman, a woman of culture and refinement, one who appreciates me not only for my athleticism and brooding good looks, but for what's in here.
Aha.
Top of the morning to you, Mr.
Getty.
I wanna hit! - Okay, just wait here and I'll Not with you! I'll get my racquet.
Next time you pick up my daughter, I appreciate if you have the courtesy to come inside.
Don't just sit in the car honking like a fucking airport shuttle.
- Sorry.
- It's called showing respect.
Yes, sir.
And bring her home at a decent hour.
What's a decent hour? Midnight.
Isn't that kind of early? I mean, she's 21.
Midnight.
Shall we? All right.
David, if you would clear the court, please.
Forehand or backhand today, sir? Oh, I think you're gonna like this one.
Mmm.
Oh! - Hi, Herb.
- Hey, kid.
- How's school? - I didn't get in the program I wanted, so I'm kind of taking a break.
Smart.
Pace yourself.
You got your whole life to make good decisions.
I gotta go teach a lesson.
Dude, how'd it go? It was fine.
- Nobody was suspicious? - Nope.
Thanks, man.
You saved my life.
Wait.
I have something for you, too.
- What's this? - Faulkner.
"The Sound and the Fury.
" Tough read, but totally worth it.
It'll do more to build your vocab and reading comprehension than any stupid SAT book.
- Thanks, Wheeler.
- Hey.
Come across any words you don't know, come find me.
I gotta go run this out to the pool.
- Need anything else? - No.
Oh Here you go, Mrs.
Getty.
- Enjoy.
- Thank you, Wilder.
- It's Wheeler.
- It's Wheeler, ma'am.
- Mrs.
Getty: Whatever.
- It's a little early in the day for happy hour, don't you think? - What? - I just need your account number, sir.
- Really? - Yes.
I'm sorry.
I'm new to this job.
I'm sure I'll have it memorized soon.
- It's 418.
- Thank you, sir.
Jesus Christ.
You know, it wouldn't kill you to be nicer to people.
- What people? - She means the help.
She's concerned for their wellbeing now that she's dating one.
Why should I be nice to them? - Karma.
- [chuckles.]
Karma.
Yeah.
You know, the Hindu concept? I tip them so I don't have to be nice.
That's the American concept.
How about out you give your lungs a break, huh? - You smoke.
- Cigars don't count.
Why not? Because they don't give you lung cancer.
[scoffs.]
No, just mouth cancer.
- So that's fine.
- That's not a real thing.
- Yes, it is.
- No, it's not.
Name one person who's ever died of mouth cancer.
Sigmund Freud.
It wasn't cigars that killed that guy.
- It was a dirty mind.
- [lighter clicks.]
Seriously, sweetie, I really don't like you smoking.
That's too bad.
I'm a grown woman.
I did it all the time in Paris.
Well, this isn't Paris.
I'm going for a swim.
Mrs.
Getty: Two weeks.
She's home two weeks, and already you're at each other's throat.
You both drive me crazy.
Hey, you're Misty, right? Wheeler's friend? Yeah.
I'm Skye.
I know.
I heard that you just got back from Paris.
Yeah, yeah, two weeks ago.
How was it? It was amazing.
Yeah.
Wow.
I better get back.
See you around.
Wow.
That's huge.
Are you sure? I just think my time will be better spent in New York focusing on painting you know, instead of sitting in a lecture hall at Sarah Lawrence.
Well, at least one of us will be living in the city.
You'll come visit me.
Yeah.
What are you doing? Cheering you up - Okay.
[laughs.]
It's not that hard.
[phone rings.]
[ringing continues.]
- Do you need to get that? - No.
No.
[ringing continues.]
Doesn't your dad have an answering machine? - Or something? - He hasn't unpacked it yet.
No.
[ringing continues.]
Just get Just get the phone.
[chuckles.]
- Ow! - [ringing continues.]
Motherfuck.
[ringing continues.]
Hello? Hi, sweetie, it's Mom.
- Hey, Mom.
- Are you okay? Why are you so out of breath? I hope you're not developing asthma.
Because your uncle Mom, I'm fine.
I don't have asthma.
- [chuckling.]
- Well, that's a relief.
So, do you wanna hear some great news? Yeah, of course.
I sold the Cranford property.
That's great, Mom.
Congrats.
That's great.
Who would think that newlyweds would wanna take on a money pit like that, but apparently he is very handy, unlike your father.
And, you know, really wants to do the renovations himself? [chuckles.]
David, are you there? Yeah, Mom, can I call you back? I'm kind of busy.
Oh, yeah, sure.
I'll be up late.
- Okay, cool.
- Wait! Don't go! Wait! Tomorrow is Father's Day.
So pick up a card for your dad.
All right? Don't forget like last year.
Yup, I won't.
Father's day card.
I got it.
Cool.
Bye.
Good-bye.
[dial tone.]
Woman: Shanti Yoga.
Hi.
This is Judy.
Judy Myers.
Judy! - [door opens.]
- David, you're here? - Dad! - Oh, jeez! Oh! Skye, I'm sorry.
I thought you were going to the mall.
I did, I did.
I came back.
- Where are you going? - [chuckles.]
Home.
- No, wait.
Skye, don't.
- Is she decent? We can just chill and watch a movie or something.
No, it's okay, all right? I should be getting home anyway.
Okay.
Oh, I almost forgot.
- Can you do me a huge favor? - Sure.
Come to the Father's Day brunch with my family tomorrow? - I don't think that's a very good idea.
- Please.
Please.
My father will be on his best behavior if you're there.
I doubt that.
He hates me.
No, he doesn't.
He just pretends to.
This could be a good opportunity for him to get to know you better.
I need to break the news to them about leaving school, so I could really use you there for moral support.
- Moral support? - Yeah.
Please.
Okay.
Yeah.
You're the best.
Bye, Mr.
Myers.
Nice to see you, Skye, even though I didn't see anything.
I'm sorry, kiddo.
No, it's okay.
We gotta come up with some sort of a code for when one of us is entertaining a lady friend, like a tube sock on the doorknob.
- That's a good idea.
- That's a good idea.
- Anybody call while I was out? - Just Mom.
Oh, hey, do you wanna do something for Father's Day? I gotta be at the club during the day, but, you know, we could go out for dinner, catch a movie.
I got a better idea.
What do say we stay home, order some pizza, open some brewskis, and we take a walk down memory lane? Where did you find those? In the attic of the house when we were moving.
And believe it or not, the bulb on this old projector, it still works.
Huh? What do you say? Yeah, sure.
Why not? [laughs.]
Good morning.
Rebecca.
Doug.
Oof.
Witch.
She always have the nose in the air like that.
Just because she got her Masters from Bryn Mawr, she thinks her shit don't stink.
You know what, sweetie? You could have done that, too.
- Believe me.
- Yes.
But I chose to put my family first.
Because you, my darling, are a full-time job.
- [chuckles.]
- Hi! - Getty: What's he doing here? - I invited him.
Happy Father's Day, Mr.
Getty.
I need a mimosa.
Hello.
Please? - Getty: My wife needs a drink.
- Now.
- Hey.
- Hey.
So how'd you do on your exam the other night? Well, no thanks to you, I got an "A".
Congrats.
Thanks.
Hey, are we okay? Yeah.
Fine.
You positive? Totally.
You're Wheeler, right? Yeah.
Who's asking? My buddy Zach told me you hooked him up yesterday.
Think you could help me out? I don't know, man.
That was like a one-time thing.
I'll pay double.
Come find me in an hour when I'm on my break, and we'll talk, all right? Righteous.
Thank you.
All right.
Thought you said you were done dealing.
- I am.
- Then what was that about? That? You know, this kid, Zach, kind of paid me 200 bucks to take his SATs for him.
So, yeah.
What? Wheeler I was just trying to help him out, all right? His dad was gonna send him to military school.
Wheeler, if you wanted to help him, you would have tutored him, so he could actually learn something.
You know, I bet a ton of these kids would be interested in having you as their SAT tutor, and their parents, too.
You could make a killing.
Yeah? Think? Happy Father's day to you both.
What a lovely pair, father and daughter.
Hey! They lifted your suspensions.
Welcome back.
You, sir, owe me a rematch.
Mrs.
Horowitz, how lovely to see you.
Hello, Nasser.
I don't believe you've met my children, Noah and Jennifer.
What? [chuckles.]
Very funny.
You almost had me going there.
Who are they really? - My children.
- I refuse to believe it, unless, you, of course, yourself were a child bride of some sort, and that's none of my business.
Oh, Nasser.
Where is Dr.
Horowitz on this lovely day for vetting fathers? - Oh, you haven't heard.
- Shalom? Oh, Rabbi Ken! What are you doing at Red Oaks? I was just meeting with the GM.
I'm officiating at a wedding here next weekend.
Ken Kaplan.
Rabbi Ken is one of our oldest and dearest friends.
This is Nasser, Red Oaks' head tennis pro.
- Nice to meet you, Nasser.
- Your Honor.
My parents only wish I had gone to law school.
You have been in my thoughts all morning.
I know today must be very difficult.
But Dan would be happy to see you all together, sitting in the sunshine, keeping him in your hearts.
I thought you'd be happy.
- Happy? Happy? - Yeah.
Lower your voice.
Everyone is staring.
Show me a parent who's happy when his daughter announces she's dropping out of college.
I'm wasting my time at Sarah Lawrence.
Like, I need another class on the Bronte sisters? No, if I want to be a serious artist, I need to be in the city, focusing on my painting.
Jesus Christ.
Think of the tuition you'll be saving.
Don't even pretend to give a shit about saving me money, not after the credit card bills you racked up in Paris.
And I'll tell you something else, young lady, you drop out of school, you are on your own.
You get no more financial support from me.
That's it.
The money is gone.
- You're on your own.
- I'll get a job.
Oh, really? Doing what? Stripping.
- With those A-cups? Least she could have done was inherit my boobs.
You're acting like a child.
Screw this.
You have no idea how the real world works! You have no idea! Thanks for brunch.
Unbelievable.
I don't wanna make a scene here, all right? Can we just keep it calm? It'll be fine.
Yes.
Getty.
Oh, Fienberg.
What do you want? Just to give you the heads-up before you hear from somebody else, the board has asked me to run for club president.
Go fuck yourself.
[scoffs.]
- He's impossible.
- Most dads are.
Not like mine.
I'm so fucking sick of him trying to micromanage me like I'm one of his goddamn employees.
I swear to God, I should have never come home from Paris.
Well, I'm glad you did.
Come here.
I know the real reason he's trying to control me is because everything else in his life is so out of control.
But it doesn't make it any easier.
Yeah.
How are you? Me? I'm fine.
I mean with the whole NYU thing.
Oh, you know, not great.
I realize I can always apply again next year, but it doesn't make it any easier.
David, I've got the most wonderful news.
What? - Dr.
Horowitz died.
- What? When? - Last fall.
- That's awful.
Serves him right.
He was playing racquetball during the High Holidays.
You're missing the point, David.
What point? Mrs.
Horowitz is back on the market.
I thought you had a rule against dating members' wives.
Not their widows.
Yes, and she's exactly the kind of woman I deserve to be with.
Beautiful, cultured, rich.
Hi! Wow! Amazing! How'd you do this so fast? I have a connection in the business office.
- Cool.
- Come on, let's put them up.
- Right now? - Yeah.
But - Let's go.
All right.
Cool.
♫ ♫ [Pop.]
Hi.
I'm meeting a friend.
She might already be here.
Oh, there she is.
Thanks.
What are you doing here? I took a taxi.
Are you okay? No.
[sniffles.]
I can't spend another minute in that house with them.
What are you gonna do? - You know, just just stay with Alex and Serge in the city until I find a place of my own.
Can you give me a ride? Yeah, of course.
Yeah, I didn't want to tell you over the phone.
So how did this happen? - Well, I I always knew that I wanted to be a mother.
And I wasn't getting any younger, so I asked my friend Ricky, who's in a similar situation, if he would ever consider having a baby together.
And here we are.
So you and he - Yeah.
Yeah.
Even though you're both - Yep.
- Yeah.
Oh.
Hmm.
Wasn't it kind of awkward? Um, at first, yeah.
But, I mean, so was sex with my husband, and I managed to get through that.
[chuckles.]
How about you? How have you been? Oh.
Good.
Fine.
I mean, you know, it's been an adjustment, but everything Overall, everything's going well.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Are you seeing anyone? No.
You should.
It's time to get back out there.
I kind of thought that's what I was doing.
[chuckles.]
Right.
♫ ♫ [rock plays.]
Wheeler's right.
Screw NYU.
You don't need them.
- I guess.
- No, this This idea that art is something that can be taught is bullshit.
You don't need to be sitting in some classroom.
You need to be out there making short films, finding your voice, meeting other artists.
God, that's That's why me moving here is gonna be so great.
For both of us.
- Mm-hmm.
Think you should check if Serge and Alex are back yet? It's fine.
I left a note.
Need anything? How about a job? Any experience? None whatsoever.
Leave your number.
I'll make sure my manager gets it.
Okay, you're amazing.
That was amazing.
That was so cool.
Oh, my God! Skye! Hi.
[kissing.]
Got your message.
What the fuck are you doing here? Looking for a place to crash.
Just for a little while, until I find my own place.
Hello M - David.
David, yes, of course.
How could I forget? - So are we gonna regret this? - I already do.
- Okay.
- Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, thank you.
I'll be right back.
I wanna start a tab.
We're celebrating! [projector whirring.]
♫ Now we take our time ♫ ♫ So nonchalant ♫ ♫ And spend our nights ♫ ♫ So bon vivant ♫ ♫ We dress our days ♫ ♫ In silken robes ♫ ♫ The money comes ♫ ♫ The money goes ♫ ♫ We know it's all ♫ ♫ A passing phase ♫ ♫ But I've loved these days ♫ ♫ Now as we indulge ♫ ♫ In things refined ♫ ♫ We hide our hearts ♫ ♫ From harder times ♫ ♫ A string of pearls ♫ ♫ A foreign car ♫ ♫ Oh, we can only ♫ ♫ Go so far ♫ ♫ On caviar ♫ ♫ And cabernet ♫ ♫ We drown our doubts ♫ ♫ In dry champagne ♫ ♫ And soothe our souls ♫ ♫ With fine cocaine ♫ ♫ I don't know why ♫ ♫ I even care ♫ ♫ We'll get so high ♫ ♫ And get nowhere ♫ ♫ We'll have to change ♫ ♫ Our jaded ways ♫