Betty (2020) s02e04 Episode Script
Sweet Tooth
Indigo.
Have you seen my red pants?
-You stressed
about some pictures?
-CAMILLE: Yeah.
INDIGO: I got you. I just need
one little favor in return,
-and we're square.
-I'll do anything.
Yo, Kirt. Are you serious?
Sexting my man
about your G spot?
I was talkin' to Micah
about your G spot.
SUIT: What do you say we go have
a drink at my place?
INDIGO:
We are about to get paid, bitch.
Everyone, shut the fuck up.
Janay is in charge.
You guys better start
fucking listening to her.
You're drunk.
I thought we were allowed
to drink wine.
HONEYBEAR: Yeah, we are. Yeah.
-KIRT: What are you doing?
-Stealing your warmth.
Yo, you think it will be okay
if I kissed you?
[TV static drones]
[bright tone]
- Now, this is about to make
a loud noise.
- What?
[saw whirring]
Whoo!
Bro, I didn't know you
were gonna do that already!
- This can't cut through
human skin!
- Oh, that's weird.
- Right?
[chuckles]
- Okay, go for it.
[cell phone rings]
Oh wait, hold on!
I gotta take this, one second.
Hello?
Bro, you just gotta go slower.
Just use more lube.
Bro, I'm doing something
right now.
I gotta go.
Bye.
[saw whirring]
- All right.
Now for the next ten days,
try not to stress the leg.
- Mm-hmm.
- That means no skateboarding.
- Yeah, that's not
my skateboard.
- Mm-hmm.
Do you want
that lollipop still?
- Um, what flavor?
- Banana.
- [chuckles] No, I'm good.
- Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby,
baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux des plans
sur la commode ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux Tellier
sur mon iPod ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux l'AMEX black
de ta mère ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux la voiture
de ton père ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux sortir
avec tes potes ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je mettrai ma plus
belle culotte ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux une session
un peu hot ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux bien que tu regardes
mais pas que tu pelotes ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
[Make the Girl Dance's
"Baby Baby Baby"]
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby,
baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
[water splashing slowly]
- Hey!
Get your booty in here.
- Hey, Honeybear.
- [sighs]
[dramatic music playing]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [speaking Japanese]
[laughs softly]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [gasps]
- The fuck?
You know Japanese?
- No.
I just--
I've been watching it
since I was little with my dad.
He--he put it on, and
we used to watch it together.
- [gasping, groaning]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [grunts]
[whimpers]
You know
I'm an anime character?
- Makes sense.
- Pew, pew, pew, pew!
[cell phone ringing]
- Shit.
[clears throat]
Hel--hello?
- Yo, Camille.
It's Dave from NFD.
- Oh, hey--hey, Dave.
What's up?
- We're all really feeling
that shoot
you and your homegirl did.
We'd love to do another one.
Maybe we could shoot
at the same spot
you shot the last one at?
- Oh, yeah, for sure, we--
- Hello?
This is Jade,
Camille's manager.
So, I heard you're looking
to rent the factory space.
- Um, possibly.
- Well, it just so happens
that we've had a cancellation.
It'll run you 2,000
for eight hours.
- Yeah, okay.
Let me get back to you.
- Talk soon.
Ciao.
[knocking on door]
[door creaks]
- [grunts]
Colder out here
than a snowman's balls.
- How you doing there,
Mr. Felix?
Everything in there.
- Where's my pickles?
- Bro, everything's in here.
I packed this
myself personally.
- Yo, don't you mean,
"Thank you"?
- Don't you mean,
"Kiss my ass"?
Looking like a biscuit
half-baked.
- Yo!
- Just--just leave it,
he's old, okay?
- You know I'm just
messing with you.
- Sir, we'll be back soon.
Hope you enjoy that, all right?
- Yes, okay.
- All right,
get up out this cold.
It's like you said,
it's too cold out here.
- Thank you.
- I got your door.
I got your door.
- I mean,
my standards are high.
I'll pay for it.
- Oh, I like that too.
- I like when there's
a power difference.
- Oh, you like role-play?
- Oh, a power difference, ah.
- I like con--
all right,
construction worker guy
and a girl.
I don't know
why I like straight sex.
I don't watch lesbian porn.
- What?
- I don't.
- I like hentai.
- What's hentai?
- Anime porn.
- They have that?
- I like it too.
It's my favorite.
- I like gang bang stuff too.
- You like gang bangs?
- [laughs]
- Yeah.
- Okay, I see you Camille!
- What's wrong with that?
- She belong to the skreets!
- She's bluffing.
- I don't actually
do the gang bang.
I just like watching it,
you know?
- Three is the most for me.
- Yeah, a threesome is way more
manageable than a gang bang.
Not that I've tried it.
I'm just--you know.
- Y'all, my ex wanted
to bring another girl in.
I was like, "Okay."
Trying to be cool with it.
And six months later,
he's still fucking her.
Neither of them are fucking me.
- Kinda ghosted you?
- They cut me out!
Like, that shit was basically
just a off-ramp to breaking up.
And like, some people
can do a long goodbye,
but I don't wanna suffer.
- Nah, fuck that.
- Damn.
- That toxic, lingering dick.
Mm-mm-mm.
- Damn.
- Yo!
- Yo, all I know, though--
all I know is that
[indistinct chatter]
[door creaks]
- Yo, Kirt!
- Kirt's here, guys, Kirt!
[guys clamoring,
voices echoing]
Okay, I don't--I don't know
where to start.
Do you--do you?
I don't know--uh
- So, um, I've been thinking
about my old babysitter, right?
Think it'd be good if I DM her?
- I don't know, I guess,
you're a grown man now.
- Yo, if I start SoulCycle,
you think I'd be able to get
more basic bitches?
- I don't fucking know!
- Kirt, does my butt look weird
in these jeans?
- No, it looks nice.
- All right, Kirt, Kirt, Kirt.
Shelby has been super distant
the past couple days.
What should I do?
Tell me what to do.
'Cause I don't know.
I'm nervous.
I don't know if she has a--
- Yo, stop asking me questions
about yourselves, bro!
It's about helping women,
so do that!
I gotta use
the fucking bathroom.
- Damn.
guys: Just help women!
Just help women!
Just help women!
Just help women!
- I get it.
all: Just help women!
Just help women!
- What's up?
- Oh, my God!
- What?
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Yo, thank you.
I had to get the fuck
out of there.
- [laughs softly]
- Um, so how long
do I got you for?
- I mean, I'm off work
till Tuesday,
if that's what you're asking.
Yeah.
- Tuesday?
- Yeah.
- This is all meant to be!
- What do you mean?
- Okay.
- Can I have some gum?
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
- When I was a kid,
I used to read
this little magazine.
- Mm-hmm.
- And there was a map in there.
- Okay.
- And I kept the map.
It's in my wallet.
- This whole time?
- Yeah.
- Damn, you're fucking
passionate about that map.
Well, where do we go?
- Do you wanna
go to church with me?
- Hmm.
I'm not really, like,
dressed for church.
[upbeat music playing]
♪
- My client, Camille,
is so excited
to shoot with you guys today.
We get tons of offers,
but we're very selective.
And it's great,
because you didn't
even have to hire any extras.
We have them all right here.
- Excuse me?
- Yeah?
- Um, do you think
that you guys
maybe have a sports bra
or something?
'Cause I feel like
my nipple--nipples are showing.
- Okay, so, first of all,
you look totally fucking hot
right now,
and second of all,
nips sell clicks, girl, hello.
You're okay?
Awesome.
- I don't know why they don't
have us change in the bathroom.
- Photo shoots
are always like this.
You're lucky you
even have this sheet.
- But you know what?
We're building our brand
right now,
and we've been stacking up
our checks during COVID.
- You guys skate too?
[laughter]
both: No.
- What is that?
- Oh, I'll take care of that.
Jzabel!
What the hell are you doing?
[Soko's "Oh, To Be a Rainbow!"
playing]
- Should I keep going straight?
Let me see the map.
- No, keep going.
We're good.
- Okay.
- Oh, to be a rainbow ♪
- Hold on.
I need to spit out my gum.
Can you roll the window down?
- I wanna be,
I wanna be a rainbow ♪
- [groans]
- What?
- There's a piece of gum
stuck--
it's stuck in our hair.
- What?
Oh that's fucking disgusting,
bro.
[upbeat music playing]
- Who do you think you are
telling my cousin
that he can't be here?
- I found this place.
- Okay, so?
Who put you in charge?
- Look, I'm trying to do
a photo shoot right now.
- Why are we even doing
photo shoots here?
I thought you said
we wanted to keep it low-key!
- It's five people, Janay.
And I'm just trying
to make some money,
because I'm, like,
homeless right now.
- Are you kidding me?
You're crashing with Camille.
- Homelessness is a spectrum.
- Which you're not even
remotely close to being on.
- This is not a storage,
and it's not a charity!
- Exactly.
So pack it the fuck up, bro!
♪
- Stop, I'm short!
- [laughs]
- I'm short, Kirt.
You've gotta keep
your head down.
- Ow.
- Stop, bro, don't yank.
- Oh, wow, look at you two.
Can I be of some assistance?
- No, we're good.
- We're definitely not good.
We have gum stuck in our hair.
- Yeah, I see it.
- Okay, yeah.
- Well, I can offer you,
ladies' choice,
a dull knife
or smooth peanut butter.
- I'm allergic
to peanut butter.
- You ate a PayDay
on the way here.
- Come on, it's just a smear.
Have a seat.
- That doesn't count.
- Yes, it does.
- I know what I'm doing.
I just castrated a beaver.
So, where you guys headed?
- Um, we're going somewhere
called Skate Church.
- That doesn't ring
a church bell.
Where is it?
- We have a map somewhere.
- Maybe right there in,
um, your hat?
Is that a map?
- No.
- I can spot a map
from anywhere in the world.
- It's not a map.
- Shh, let me grab it--
- No, stop!
- Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
- Let her grab it!
- It--oh, look at that!
Very nice,
but I see you have some
serious water damage over here.
- Kirt.
- I figured we'd wing it.
- Well, why didn't you just say
you're gonna wing it?
You know what I would suggest?
Going to The Oracle.
It's off I-70, it's fantastic.
You're really gonna like it.
I go there a lot of times
when I'm feeling lost,
or I just need some answers,
or I just wanna people watch.
- [scoffs]
Well, I am hungry.
- There you go.
Ow!
- There you go!
Stay on the trail.
The ranger is a pervert.
[Latto's "In N Out"]
♪
- M-M-M-Murda.
- Only big talk shit
come out my mouth ♪
You know the sex too good,
can't leave the house ♪
I'm a spoiled-ass bitch,
I like to pout ♪
My nigga pop that shit
if he pull it out ♪
It go in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
In-in-in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
My nigga pop that shit
if he pull it out ♪
My nigga pop
that shit if he pull it out ♪
It go in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
- Well, hello there,
little chickadees.
- Hi.
- Welcome to The Oracle.
What can I get you?
Now, we got wings,
we got dancers,
and we got answers.
- Wings, wings.
- Yeah, let's get some wings,
please.
- Yes.
- All right, then.
I'm gonna bring you
your bucket, all right?
- All right.
- Wait, wait!
Um, do you know
how to get to this place
called The Skate Church?
- Oh, honey, I haven't
been to church in years.
- No, I'm on, like, a mission.
- Missions are bullshit.
Wherever you go,
you can find heaven or hell
anywhere or in anyone.
[taps hood]
All right, now!
I'ma go get you
your bucket of wings.
[both laugh]
[energetic music playing]
- Sweet cheeks,
at it once again ♪
Pick up the phone,
'cause they're the friend ♪
Thots got so comfy
thought it was the end ♪
- No way.
♪
Oh, shit!
[laughs]
[both laugh]
- Yo, she's nice with it!
Oh, my God!
- [laughs]
Is this even allowed, bro?
No, this cannot be allowed.
- [laughs]
- Wait.
- What?
- Is that the fucking Halo Tree
from the map?
- Yo, we're not allowed
out of the car, bro!
You're gonna get in trouble!
- Hey, excuse me!
Excuse me!
- You're not supposed
to be out here.
- I know,
but the tattoo on your ass,
is that the Halo Tree?
- Yeah.
- Do you know where
the Skate Church is?
- Of course.
- Stay your ass in the car.
- Like, 6 miles down the road.
- All right, thank you!
- [laughs]
- Get the fuck back here.
- Yo!
[tires screech]
- Camille, put the board, like,
over your shoulders like this.
Right?
Isn't that cute?
- No, that's kind of, like--
that's kind of a poser--
people aren't supposed
to do that, I--
- Okay, I totally understand,
but let's just try that shit.
- Yeah.
- Feel like that.
- Yes.
- Yeah, oh, my God.
That is--that's so cute, girls.
- Yes, so cute.
- I love it.
- What if you guys start
dancing a little bit?
Give me, like,
Lady Gaga at the VMAs,
but, like, less Adderall-like.
- Yeah, just like,
feel the music.
- Just, like, move your body
at all, Camille, just anything.
- Oh, my God,
do what they're doing.
Just follow their lead.
- So then just look
at the camera.
Give me, like, relaxed casual,
but energy.
- Like--no, no, no, no, no,
boys.
- [mockingly]
No, no, no, no, no.
- Boys!
- No, no, no.
- Stop being awful.
- [faint]
Okay, Camille.
You're Britney Spears,
you're on Instagram,
you just got a new outfit.
What do you do?
Go.
- Maybe, like, flirt
with the camera a little bit?
- Yeah.
[indistinct chatter]
- Why you hold the broom
that way?
[both laugh]
[unintelligible].
- [laughs]
[soft melancholy music]
♪
What the fuck?
[sighs]
- All right, well,
can we at least hang out later?
[scoffs]
- [sniffling, sobbing]
- Hey.
What's wrong?
- I looked like an idiot
out there, bro.
Just like
They're all laughing at me
and stuff.
- Who--no--
who is laughing at you?
- Yes, they were 'cause
I look like a fucking idiot.
I'm just over--I'm over feeling
like I have to prove myself
to these people,
to everybody, like
And then one thing ha--
I thought it was gonna be fun.
I thought it was gonna be,
like, serious, but no.
- It should be fun.
That's why I work so hard.
So that we could have
our own space to feel safe at
and to have fun.
- Look, fuck them, okay?
You shouldn't feel like this.
Your last video got, like,
50,000 views.
- You posted it?
- Yeah.
Look, it's so good.
Look.
[skateboard scraping]
- This--this isn't the video.
- What do you mean?
- This isn't the video
that I made with Tai--
Tai's not even in this video.
What the fuck?
He's--they cut him out.
They, like--
Why the fuck, they--
[sighs]
Fuck this brand.
- I'm so--
- Man, fuck this brand.
- I'm so sorry.
- Fuck them.
No, it's not
- Come and hold my hand ♪
I wanna contact the living ♪
- COVID hug.
[both laugh softly]
- Not sure I understand ♪
- All right, I'm
Let's--a little longer, okay?
- A little bit longer.
- I sit and talk to God ♪
And he just laughs
at my plans ♪
My head speaks a language ♪
I don't understand ♪
♪
I just wanna feel
real love ♪
Feel the home
that I live in ♪
That I live in ♪
'Cause I got too much life
running through my veins ♪
Going to waste ♪
♪
I don't wanna die ♪
- There you are.
Just in time.
- Where did everybody go?
- We wrapped early, girl.
Today was a little bit
of a bummer zone.
- Yeah.
- But we came up
with a really good compensation
that we feel like is fair,
given the circumstances.
And super dope!
Ta-da!
- These are hoodies.
This was a $2,000 job.
What the fuck?
- Yeah.
We had expectations too.
- [laughs softly]
- I just wanna feel
real love ♪
Feel the home
that I live in ♪
That I live in ♪
'Cause I got too much life
running through my veins ♪
Going to waste ♪
And I need to feel
real love ♪
And a life ever after ♪
I cannot get enough ♪
- I thought you said
it was 6 miles.
- That's what she said.
Maybe it was the other way.
- Kirt, you don't know
where the fuck we're going.
- Wait, look,
it's a bunch of skater kids!
We gotta be close.
- I don't see a Halo Tree.
[soft ethereal music]
[bird squawking]
♪
- Yo, you guys know
where is the Halo Tree?
- The what?
- The Halo Tree,
like, the big tree?
- It's, like
- Like this.
- Uh, Halo Tree
by Skate Church?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
both: Skate Church, dude!
[both laugh]
- Yo, what?
Yo, you just gotta
fucking tell them, bro.
- All right.
Hate to break it to you,
Skate Church is a myth.
- What the--?
- [laughs]
- No, he's fucking with you,
bro.
All right,
you see that mountain?
- I saw a mountain, like,
five minutes ago.
- Yeah, that's the one.
- Okay.
- Climb it.
- Fuck y'all fucking townies!
So stupid.
- Wait, wait, wait!
We were just about to tell you,
come back!
- You're fucking with us!
[soft laughter]
♪
[BOSCO's "Attention" playing]
- Can you tell me why
you ain't pick up the phone? ♪
911, it's emergency ♪
Why you actin' like
you never heard of me? ♪
- Can I, like
Touch your boob?
- Yeah.
- All right.
- I ain't asking
for perfection ♪
All I'm asking
for is attention ♪
We ain't gotta reinvent it ♪
- Can I touch the other one?
- What did you think,
that was, like,
a one-titty permission slip
or something?
- I just had to make sure it
was cool with you.
- Yeah, okay, can you just,
like, take me already?
- Shit.
All right.
- Baby, spend it,
baby, spend it ♪
Boy, you think you cool,
puffing out your chest ♪
Showing all your moves,
and now you playing chess ♪
They say you'll never win
unless you're scared to lose ♪
I get what I want,
I pick and I choose ♪
Talking 'bout a queen ♪
- But wait.
What do you, like,
actually mean by like, "take"?
'Cause take is such a unclear
word to use for this.
- Yeah, I'm--
you know,
I'm just gonna go heat up
some Thai food, okay?
- What?
Why?
- [mumbling] It's nothing.
It's nothing.
- Uh
[soft piano music playing]
- I get the impression
that it's rare
to get a second date with you.
- Yes.
- And I'm honored.
- Pardon me.
Would either of you
like anything sweet
from the cart tonight?
- No, thank you,
I don't need anything.
- Uh, yes, you do.
Hold on.
The chocolate tart.
- Mm.
- It's the only reason
to come here.
She'll have one.
- I really don't need it.
- It is very good.
- I mean,
I'm sure it's delicious,
but I'm so--I'm so full.
- Enjoy.
- Just try it.
Please.
- Okay.
Wow.
- Tell me I'm wrong.
- You're not wrong.
- I'm never wrong.
So, Violet,
I have $5,000 for you.
That is
[exhales softly]
if you let me do one thing.
One thing.
[tires squeal]
- What the hell, Kirt?
We've been driving in circles
for hours.
[sighs]
This is bullshit.
You took me
on a random-ass trip,
on some fucking wild
goose chase to somewhere
you don't even know exists!
- But it might exist.
- Okay, well,
where might we sleep, Kirt?
Oh, nah.
- We could sleep
in the back seat.
- Don't even tell me.
I'm not sleeping
in the back seat
of my mom's car.
Her fucking dog has taken
a shit back there!
I'm hungry, I'm tired,
and I left my retainer at home.
- You have a retainer?
- Yes, my retainer.
- Oh, my God,
that's so fucking hot.
- Stop it.
- I have, like,
a thing for, like,
adult women
that have retainers.
- You're lying, bro.
[sighs]
- No, I'm serious.
And it makes your teeth,
like, so fucking straight.
- And you know why?
Because I bring my retainer
wherever I go.
- So, why you forgot it now?
- Don't fuck with me right now,
Kirt!
- Shelby.
- What?
- Listen.
- What?
- I don't know
if Skate Church is real.
I just wanted to go
somewhere with you.
And I don't like
when you're mad at me.
- I wasn't mad.
- You were a little mad.
[smooching]
- [moaning, panting softly]
Fuck.
[moaning loudly]
[panting heavily]
So I--so I do have a G-spot.
- Whoa.
- Oh, my God.
- Shelby.
- Oh, my God.
We made it.
[laughs]
- [laughs]
[soft hopeful music]
[soft jazzy music playing]
♪
♪
♪
[bright tone]
Shelby, we click really well,
and I want to say that I li
Okay.
I'm going as a banana.
And you're gonna look hot.
You know this is true.
What's wrong with you?
Okay, so, we were kissing,
but every time--
Okay, okay, okay.
That's a conversation
for you and your
little girlfriends, okay?
Why do I have to tell you
when I'm coming over?
-Do we need a facilitator?
-Apparently we do.
Don't be talking to me with
your hands all up in my face.
You don't know my life.
I know enough!
Our date or whatever,
that was a good time, right?
Wait, you're a prostitute?
No--
Have you seen my red pants?
-You stressed
about some pictures?
-CAMILLE: Yeah.
INDIGO: I got you. I just need
one little favor in return,
-and we're square.
-I'll do anything.
Yo, Kirt. Are you serious?
Sexting my man
about your G spot?
I was talkin' to Micah
about your G spot.
SUIT: What do you say we go have
a drink at my place?
INDIGO:
We are about to get paid, bitch.
Everyone, shut the fuck up.
Janay is in charge.
You guys better start
fucking listening to her.
You're drunk.
I thought we were allowed
to drink wine.
HONEYBEAR: Yeah, we are. Yeah.
-KIRT: What are you doing?
-Stealing your warmth.
Yo, you think it will be okay
if I kissed you?
[TV static drones]
[bright tone]
- Now, this is about to make
a loud noise.
- What?
[saw whirring]
Whoo!
Bro, I didn't know you
were gonna do that already!
- This can't cut through
human skin!
- Oh, that's weird.
- Right?
[chuckles]
- Okay, go for it.
[cell phone rings]
Oh wait, hold on!
I gotta take this, one second.
Hello?
Bro, you just gotta go slower.
Just use more lube.
Bro, I'm doing something
right now.
I gotta go.
Bye.
[saw whirring]
- All right.
Now for the next ten days,
try not to stress the leg.
- Mm-hmm.
- That means no skateboarding.
- Yeah, that's not
my skateboard.
- Mm-hmm.
Do you want
that lollipop still?
- Um, what flavor?
- Banana.
- [chuckles] No, I'm good.
- Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby,
baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux des plans
sur la commode ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux Tellier
sur mon iPod ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux l'AMEX black
de ta mère ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux la voiture
de ton père ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux sortir
avec tes potes ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je mettrai ma plus
belle culotte ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux une session
un peu hot ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Je veux bien que tu regardes
mais pas que tu pelotes ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
[Make the Girl Dance's
"Baby Baby Baby"]
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby,
baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby ♪
Baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
[water splashing slowly]
- Hey!
Get your booty in here.
- Hey, Honeybear.
- [sighs]
[dramatic music playing]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [speaking Japanese]
[laughs softly]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [gasps]
- The fuck?
You know Japanese?
- No.
I just--
I've been watching it
since I was little with my dad.
He--he put it on, and
we used to watch it together.
- [gasping, groaning]
- [speaking Japanese]
- [grunts]
[whimpers]
You know
I'm an anime character?
- Makes sense.
- Pew, pew, pew, pew!
[cell phone ringing]
- Shit.
[clears throat]
Hel--hello?
- Yo, Camille.
It's Dave from NFD.
- Oh, hey--hey, Dave.
What's up?
- We're all really feeling
that shoot
you and your homegirl did.
We'd love to do another one.
Maybe we could shoot
at the same spot
you shot the last one at?
- Oh, yeah, for sure, we--
- Hello?
This is Jade,
Camille's manager.
So, I heard you're looking
to rent the factory space.
- Um, possibly.
- Well, it just so happens
that we've had a cancellation.
It'll run you 2,000
for eight hours.
- Yeah, okay.
Let me get back to you.
- Talk soon.
Ciao.
[knocking on door]
[door creaks]
- [grunts]
Colder out here
than a snowman's balls.
- How you doing there,
Mr. Felix?
Everything in there.
- Where's my pickles?
- Bro, everything's in here.
I packed this
myself personally.
- Yo, don't you mean,
"Thank you"?
- Don't you mean,
"Kiss my ass"?
Looking like a biscuit
half-baked.
- Yo!
- Just--just leave it,
he's old, okay?
- You know I'm just
messing with you.
- Sir, we'll be back soon.
Hope you enjoy that, all right?
- Yes, okay.
- All right,
get up out this cold.
It's like you said,
it's too cold out here.
- Thank you.
- I got your door.
I got your door.
- I mean,
my standards are high.
I'll pay for it.
- Oh, I like that too.
- I like when there's
a power difference.
- Oh, you like role-play?
- Oh, a power difference, ah.
- I like con--
all right,
construction worker guy
and a girl.
I don't know
why I like straight sex.
I don't watch lesbian porn.
- What?
- I don't.
- I like hentai.
- What's hentai?
- Anime porn.
- They have that?
- I like it too.
It's my favorite.
- I like gang bang stuff too.
- You like gang bangs?
- [laughs]
- Yeah.
- Okay, I see you Camille!
- What's wrong with that?
- She belong to the skreets!
- She's bluffing.
- I don't actually
do the gang bang.
I just like watching it,
you know?
- Three is the most for me.
- Yeah, a threesome is way more
manageable than a gang bang.
Not that I've tried it.
I'm just--you know.
- Y'all, my ex wanted
to bring another girl in.
I was like, "Okay."
Trying to be cool with it.
And six months later,
he's still fucking her.
Neither of them are fucking me.
- Kinda ghosted you?
- They cut me out!
Like, that shit was basically
just a off-ramp to breaking up.
And like, some people
can do a long goodbye,
but I don't wanna suffer.
- Nah, fuck that.
- Damn.
- That toxic, lingering dick.
Mm-mm-mm.
- Damn.
- Yo!
- Yo, all I know, though--
all I know is that
[indistinct chatter]
[door creaks]
- Yo, Kirt!
- Kirt's here, guys, Kirt!
[guys clamoring,
voices echoing]
Okay, I don't--I don't know
where to start.
Do you--do you?
I don't know--uh
- So, um, I've been thinking
about my old babysitter, right?
Think it'd be good if I DM her?
- I don't know, I guess,
you're a grown man now.
- Yo, if I start SoulCycle,
you think I'd be able to get
more basic bitches?
- I don't fucking know!
- Kirt, does my butt look weird
in these jeans?
- No, it looks nice.
- All right, Kirt, Kirt, Kirt.
Shelby has been super distant
the past couple days.
What should I do?
Tell me what to do.
'Cause I don't know.
I'm nervous.
I don't know if she has a--
- Yo, stop asking me questions
about yourselves, bro!
It's about helping women,
so do that!
I gotta use
the fucking bathroom.
- Damn.
guys: Just help women!
Just help women!
Just help women!
Just help women!
- I get it.
all: Just help women!
Just help women!
- What's up?
- Oh, my God!
- What?
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Yo, thank you.
I had to get the fuck
out of there.
- [laughs softly]
- Um, so how long
do I got you for?
- I mean, I'm off work
till Tuesday,
if that's what you're asking.
Yeah.
- Tuesday?
- Yeah.
- This is all meant to be!
- What do you mean?
- Okay.
- Can I have some gum?
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
- When I was a kid,
I used to read
this little magazine.
- Mm-hmm.
- And there was a map in there.
- Okay.
- And I kept the map.
It's in my wallet.
- This whole time?
- Yeah.
- Damn, you're fucking
passionate about that map.
Well, where do we go?
- Do you wanna
go to church with me?
- Hmm.
I'm not really, like,
dressed for church.
[upbeat music playing]
♪
- My client, Camille,
is so excited
to shoot with you guys today.
We get tons of offers,
but we're very selective.
And it's great,
because you didn't
even have to hire any extras.
We have them all right here.
- Excuse me?
- Yeah?
- Um, do you think
that you guys
maybe have a sports bra
or something?
'Cause I feel like
my nipple--nipples are showing.
- Okay, so, first of all,
you look totally fucking hot
right now,
and second of all,
nips sell clicks, girl, hello.
You're okay?
Awesome.
- I don't know why they don't
have us change in the bathroom.
- Photo shoots
are always like this.
You're lucky you
even have this sheet.
- But you know what?
We're building our brand
right now,
and we've been stacking up
our checks during COVID.
- You guys skate too?
[laughter]
both: No.
- What is that?
- Oh, I'll take care of that.
Jzabel!
What the hell are you doing?
[Soko's "Oh, To Be a Rainbow!"
playing]
- Should I keep going straight?
Let me see the map.
- No, keep going.
We're good.
- Okay.
- Oh, to be a rainbow ♪
- Hold on.
I need to spit out my gum.
Can you roll the window down?
- I wanna be,
I wanna be a rainbow ♪
- [groans]
- What?
- There's a piece of gum
stuck--
it's stuck in our hair.
- What?
Oh that's fucking disgusting,
bro.
[upbeat music playing]
- Who do you think you are
telling my cousin
that he can't be here?
- I found this place.
- Okay, so?
Who put you in charge?
- Look, I'm trying to do
a photo shoot right now.
- Why are we even doing
photo shoots here?
I thought you said
we wanted to keep it low-key!
- It's five people, Janay.
And I'm just trying
to make some money,
because I'm, like,
homeless right now.
- Are you kidding me?
You're crashing with Camille.
- Homelessness is a spectrum.
- Which you're not even
remotely close to being on.
- This is not a storage,
and it's not a charity!
- Exactly.
So pack it the fuck up, bro!
♪
- Stop, I'm short!
- [laughs]
- I'm short, Kirt.
You've gotta keep
your head down.
- Ow.
- Stop, bro, don't yank.
- Oh, wow, look at you two.
Can I be of some assistance?
- No, we're good.
- We're definitely not good.
We have gum stuck in our hair.
- Yeah, I see it.
- Okay, yeah.
- Well, I can offer you,
ladies' choice,
a dull knife
or smooth peanut butter.
- I'm allergic
to peanut butter.
- You ate a PayDay
on the way here.
- Come on, it's just a smear.
Have a seat.
- That doesn't count.
- Yes, it does.
- I know what I'm doing.
I just castrated a beaver.
So, where you guys headed?
- Um, we're going somewhere
called Skate Church.
- That doesn't ring
a church bell.
Where is it?
- We have a map somewhere.
- Maybe right there in,
um, your hat?
Is that a map?
- No.
- I can spot a map
from anywhere in the world.
- It's not a map.
- Shh, let me grab it--
- No, stop!
- Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
- Let her grab it!
- It--oh, look at that!
Very nice,
but I see you have some
serious water damage over here.
- Kirt.
- I figured we'd wing it.
- Well, why didn't you just say
you're gonna wing it?
You know what I would suggest?
Going to The Oracle.
It's off I-70, it's fantastic.
You're really gonna like it.
I go there a lot of times
when I'm feeling lost,
or I just need some answers,
or I just wanna people watch.
- [scoffs]
Well, I am hungry.
- There you go.
Ow!
- There you go!
Stay on the trail.
The ranger is a pervert.
[Latto's "In N Out"]
♪
- M-M-M-Murda.
- Only big talk shit
come out my mouth ♪
You know the sex too good,
can't leave the house ♪
I'm a spoiled-ass bitch,
I like to pout ♪
My nigga pop that shit
if he pull it out ♪
It go in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
In-in-in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
My nigga pop that shit
if he pull it out ♪
My nigga pop
that shit if he pull it out ♪
It go in and out,
in-in-in and out ♪
- Well, hello there,
little chickadees.
- Hi.
- Welcome to The Oracle.
What can I get you?
Now, we got wings,
we got dancers,
and we got answers.
- Wings, wings.
- Yeah, let's get some wings,
please.
- Yes.
- All right, then.
I'm gonna bring you
your bucket, all right?
- All right.
- Wait, wait!
Um, do you know
how to get to this place
called The Skate Church?
- Oh, honey, I haven't
been to church in years.
- No, I'm on, like, a mission.
- Missions are bullshit.
Wherever you go,
you can find heaven or hell
anywhere or in anyone.
[taps hood]
All right, now!
I'ma go get you
your bucket of wings.
[both laugh]
[energetic music playing]
- Sweet cheeks,
at it once again ♪
Pick up the phone,
'cause they're the friend ♪
Thots got so comfy
thought it was the end ♪
- No way.
♪
Oh, shit!
[laughs]
[both laugh]
- Yo, she's nice with it!
Oh, my God!
- [laughs]
Is this even allowed, bro?
No, this cannot be allowed.
- [laughs]
- Wait.
- What?
- Is that the fucking Halo Tree
from the map?
- Yo, we're not allowed
out of the car, bro!
You're gonna get in trouble!
- Hey, excuse me!
Excuse me!
- You're not supposed
to be out here.
- I know,
but the tattoo on your ass,
is that the Halo Tree?
- Yeah.
- Do you know where
the Skate Church is?
- Of course.
- Stay your ass in the car.
- Like, 6 miles down the road.
- All right, thank you!
- [laughs]
- Get the fuck back here.
- Yo!
[tires screech]
- Camille, put the board, like,
over your shoulders like this.
Right?
Isn't that cute?
- No, that's kind of, like--
that's kind of a poser--
people aren't supposed
to do that, I--
- Okay, I totally understand,
but let's just try that shit.
- Yeah.
- Feel like that.
- Yes.
- Yeah, oh, my God.
That is--that's so cute, girls.
- Yes, so cute.
- I love it.
- What if you guys start
dancing a little bit?
Give me, like,
Lady Gaga at the VMAs,
but, like, less Adderall-like.
- Yeah, just like,
feel the music.
- Just, like, move your body
at all, Camille, just anything.
- Oh, my God,
do what they're doing.
Just follow their lead.
- So then just look
at the camera.
Give me, like, relaxed casual,
but energy.
- Like--no, no, no, no, no,
boys.
- [mockingly]
No, no, no, no, no.
- Boys!
- No, no, no.
- Stop being awful.
- [faint]
Okay, Camille.
You're Britney Spears,
you're on Instagram,
you just got a new outfit.
What do you do?
Go.
- Maybe, like, flirt
with the camera a little bit?
- Yeah.
[indistinct chatter]
- Why you hold the broom
that way?
[both laugh]
[unintelligible].
- [laughs]
[soft melancholy music]
♪
What the fuck?
[sighs]
- All right, well,
can we at least hang out later?
[scoffs]
- [sniffling, sobbing]
- Hey.
What's wrong?
- I looked like an idiot
out there, bro.
Just like
They're all laughing at me
and stuff.
- Who--no--
who is laughing at you?
- Yes, they were 'cause
I look like a fucking idiot.
I'm just over--I'm over feeling
like I have to prove myself
to these people,
to everybody, like
And then one thing ha--
I thought it was gonna be fun.
I thought it was gonna be,
like, serious, but no.
- It should be fun.
That's why I work so hard.
So that we could have
our own space to feel safe at
and to have fun.
- Look, fuck them, okay?
You shouldn't feel like this.
Your last video got, like,
50,000 views.
- You posted it?
- Yeah.
Look, it's so good.
Look.
[skateboard scraping]
- This--this isn't the video.
- What do you mean?
- This isn't the video
that I made with Tai--
Tai's not even in this video.
What the fuck?
He's--they cut him out.
They, like--
Why the fuck, they--
[sighs]
Fuck this brand.
- I'm so--
- Man, fuck this brand.
- I'm so sorry.
- Fuck them.
No, it's not
- Come and hold my hand ♪
I wanna contact the living ♪
- COVID hug.
[both laugh softly]
- Not sure I understand ♪
- All right, I'm
Let's--a little longer, okay?
- A little bit longer.
- I sit and talk to God ♪
And he just laughs
at my plans ♪
My head speaks a language ♪
I don't understand ♪
♪
I just wanna feel
real love ♪
Feel the home
that I live in ♪
That I live in ♪
'Cause I got too much life
running through my veins ♪
Going to waste ♪
♪
I don't wanna die ♪
- There you are.
Just in time.
- Where did everybody go?
- We wrapped early, girl.
Today was a little bit
of a bummer zone.
- Yeah.
- But we came up
with a really good compensation
that we feel like is fair,
given the circumstances.
And super dope!
Ta-da!
- These are hoodies.
This was a $2,000 job.
What the fuck?
- Yeah.
We had expectations too.
- [laughs softly]
- I just wanna feel
real love ♪
Feel the home
that I live in ♪
That I live in ♪
'Cause I got too much life
running through my veins ♪
Going to waste ♪
And I need to feel
real love ♪
And a life ever after ♪
I cannot get enough ♪
- I thought you said
it was 6 miles.
- That's what she said.
Maybe it was the other way.
- Kirt, you don't know
where the fuck we're going.
- Wait, look,
it's a bunch of skater kids!
We gotta be close.
- I don't see a Halo Tree.
[soft ethereal music]
[bird squawking]
♪
- Yo, you guys know
where is the Halo Tree?
- The what?
- The Halo Tree,
like, the big tree?
- It's, like
- Like this.
- Uh, Halo Tree
by Skate Church?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
both: Skate Church, dude!
[both laugh]
- Yo, what?
Yo, you just gotta
fucking tell them, bro.
- All right.
Hate to break it to you,
Skate Church is a myth.
- What the--?
- [laughs]
- No, he's fucking with you,
bro.
All right,
you see that mountain?
- I saw a mountain, like,
five minutes ago.
- Yeah, that's the one.
- Okay.
- Climb it.
- Fuck y'all fucking townies!
So stupid.
- Wait, wait, wait!
We were just about to tell you,
come back!
- You're fucking with us!
[soft laughter]
♪
[BOSCO's "Attention" playing]
- Can you tell me why
you ain't pick up the phone? ♪
911, it's emergency ♪
Why you actin' like
you never heard of me? ♪
- Can I, like
Touch your boob?
- Yeah.
- All right.
- I ain't asking
for perfection ♪
All I'm asking
for is attention ♪
We ain't gotta reinvent it ♪
- Can I touch the other one?
- What did you think,
that was, like,
a one-titty permission slip
or something?
- I just had to make sure it
was cool with you.
- Yeah, okay, can you just,
like, take me already?
- Shit.
All right.
- Baby, spend it,
baby, spend it ♪
Boy, you think you cool,
puffing out your chest ♪
Showing all your moves,
and now you playing chess ♪
They say you'll never win
unless you're scared to lose ♪
I get what I want,
I pick and I choose ♪
Talking 'bout a queen ♪
- But wait.
What do you, like,
actually mean by like, "take"?
'Cause take is such a unclear
word to use for this.
- Yeah, I'm--
you know,
I'm just gonna go heat up
some Thai food, okay?
- What?
Why?
- [mumbling] It's nothing.
It's nothing.
- Uh
[soft piano music playing]
- I get the impression
that it's rare
to get a second date with you.
- Yes.
- And I'm honored.
- Pardon me.
Would either of you
like anything sweet
from the cart tonight?
- No, thank you,
I don't need anything.
- Uh, yes, you do.
Hold on.
The chocolate tart.
- Mm.
- It's the only reason
to come here.
She'll have one.
- I really don't need it.
- It is very good.
- I mean,
I'm sure it's delicious,
but I'm so--I'm so full.
- Enjoy.
- Just try it.
Please.
- Okay.
Wow.
- Tell me I'm wrong.
- You're not wrong.
- I'm never wrong.
So, Violet,
I have $5,000 for you.
That is
[exhales softly]
if you let me do one thing.
One thing.
[tires squeal]
- What the hell, Kirt?
We've been driving in circles
for hours.
[sighs]
This is bullshit.
You took me
on a random-ass trip,
on some fucking wild
goose chase to somewhere
you don't even know exists!
- But it might exist.
- Okay, well,
where might we sleep, Kirt?
Oh, nah.
- We could sleep
in the back seat.
- Don't even tell me.
I'm not sleeping
in the back seat
of my mom's car.
Her fucking dog has taken
a shit back there!
I'm hungry, I'm tired,
and I left my retainer at home.
- You have a retainer?
- Yes, my retainer.
- Oh, my God,
that's so fucking hot.
- Stop it.
- I have, like,
a thing for, like,
adult women
that have retainers.
- You're lying, bro.
[sighs]
- No, I'm serious.
And it makes your teeth,
like, so fucking straight.
- And you know why?
Because I bring my retainer
wherever I go.
- So, why you forgot it now?
- Don't fuck with me right now,
Kirt!
- Shelby.
- What?
- Listen.
- What?
- I don't know
if Skate Church is real.
I just wanted to go
somewhere with you.
And I don't like
when you're mad at me.
- I wasn't mad.
- You were a little mad.
[smooching]
- [moaning, panting softly]
Fuck.
[moaning loudly]
[panting heavily]
So I--so I do have a G-spot.
- Whoa.
- Oh, my God.
- Shelby.
- Oh, my God.
We made it.
[laughs]
- [laughs]
[soft hopeful music]
[soft jazzy music playing]
♪
♪
♪
[bright tone]
Shelby, we click really well,
and I want to say that I li
Okay.
I'm going as a banana.
And you're gonna look hot.
You know this is true.
What's wrong with you?
Okay, so, we were kissing,
but every time--
Okay, okay, okay.
That's a conversation
for you and your
little girlfriends, okay?
Why do I have to tell you
when I'm coming over?
-Do we need a facilitator?
-Apparently we do.
Don't be talking to me with
your hands all up in my face.
You don't know my life.
I know enough!
Our date or whatever,
that was a good time, right?
Wait, you're a prostitute?
No--