Clarence US (2014) s02e04 Episode Script

Hey, Chad! Look at this! Nuns.
- Did that plane look big to you? - Yeah, I guess! Chad, do you think you could fly a plane with no eyes? Uh, maybe? Hey, Chad, do you know what the best part of flying is? - Uh, what? - Everybody high fives, - but they're upside down.
- What?! Yeah, it's looks like this.
Hey! Mind your child.
Clarence, listen, can you keep a secret? Of course everyone tells me stuff.
I've never been on a plane before.
What? Not even to visit your Grandma? - Nope.
- Well, today's your lucky day, 'cause my Grandma lives in Florida, and we're going to her funeral! - Is it scary? - Well, she used to be scary.
Okay, guys, I tried to get us seats together, but they said we have to be rewards members.
All right, Clarence, are you going to be a good boy and behave yourself - while sitting all alone? - Yeah, sure! But Chad's not coming, though he's scared of flying.
- What?! - Clarence! - No, he's not.
- I I'm not scared! - I just never been on a plane before.
- Really? You know what, it's not a big deal.
I'm sure you'll be just fine, hon.
Now boarding seriously, people, hurry up.
Don't worry, Chad.
Birds fly every day, and they're not scared.
Day 17 on the ice planet.
The ground is cracking beneath our feet.
I spy a ice yeti feasting on seal blubber.
Clarence, get off the floor.
Your turn, Chad! Oof! It helps if you jump first.
- All right, let's go, Chad.
- What if I fall through? What no.
Chad, come on.
- Yeah! I did it! - Very good, sir.
That was excellent.
All right, here's my seat.
Can you put the luggage in the overhead bin? Where's Clarence? Clarence? Clarence?! Get Get out of there! - No! - Stop that, Clarence! - No, this is my new home.
- Get out of there! - Ah, no! - Go, find your seat! Excuse me.
How come you're wearing a toilet seat on your neck? - Clarence, did you find a seat? - No! Uh, yes.
Okay, let's find your seat now.
Oh, lucky! You got an exit row.
Okay, I'm gonna go check on Clarence.
I'll be right back, okay? Uh Meow! - Did you fasten your seat belt? - Yes, I did.
Here's some water for you.
And here is a bag of cheezos.
Oh, here's a magic blankie that will protect you.
And here is a magic bag in case you get sick.
Whoo magic bag! Cool.
And if you need anything, I'm over there, okay? - Okay, thanks.
- Mom I mean, Mary.
- God, I love ya! - Love you, too.
- Sir! - Who, me?! You are seated in an emergency row.
Are you willing and capable to help when an emergency happens? - Emergency?! - If it happens.
I'm gonna need a verbal "yes" to confirm.
Uh, yeah.
I don't know! It's moving! You know what that means.
Time for the count down.
10, nine, eight, seven six, five, four, three, two, one! Yay! Wow! So pretty! I can watch this forever.
Good morning, folks.
This is Captain Tom speaking.
Good morning, Captain Tom! We're cruising at an altitude of 30,000 feet, and should be in Orlando in about four hours.
For now, please enjoy a complimentary drink and a screening of "Family dinner.
" Tv! Headsets are available for purchase.
What do you want to drink? Water and headset, please.
And do you have any empty seats that I can move to? Oh, why?! We can switch seats! Sorry, the flight is full.
What will your son have? Oh, he's not my dad.
Um, can I have more free peanuts? Uh, waiter? I'm not a waiter, I'm a flight attendant.
Why do you have eye bags? You know what you need? Some wings! Wow! Ow.
Ow.
It's okay, buddy, it's okay.
No, no.
My boys sit back there.
Yeah, this is mom's free time, you know.
Mmm, mmm! Can I Can I get another one of those cheese cups? Busy working on business, eh? I myself brought some business of my own.
I got some book business, I got these markers, they're kind of dried up, though.
Ooh, this is a business wiz.
Ask him any question.
A crying baby! Uh, hello! Hello, baby! Whee! All right folks, now you're free to walk about the cabin.
Clarence?! What're What're you doing? - We're about to take off! - No, we're not.
We've been flying for the last hour! Chad, it's just a pretty sky.
You see it every day! I was just going to say I need to take a sky break.
Wait, I'm coming with you! Hey, Mom.
Me and Chad are gonna go to the bathroom.
- Do you want to come? - Uh, mommy isn't feeling very well.
I'm gonna stay here, okay? Okay, Clarence's mom.
I'll keep you safe and clean.
That's very very sweet of you.
Chad, can you keep an eye on him for me? Uh, yeah, sure thing! Mom, I really need to go! - Yeah, we all do, Tommy, we all do! - This guy is taking forever! Huh? Who knew?! It's been empty the whole time! Uh, okay.
All right, yeah.
And then a slide like, playtime.
Oh! Oh, that's salt water.
The thing with the lady and her Oh, no! - Whoa! - Sorry.
- First time flying! - Oh, that's okay, friend! What's all that blue stuff? It's all yours, Chad.
- Uh.
Wait right here.
- You got it, sky buddy.
Where's the Oh.
It's under this small table, of course.
Hi.
Oh, Daniel, you are too funny.
Daniel, you are too funny! Huh?! Oh, no, my magic blanket! Oh, no! Good morning, everyone! This is Captain Clarence speaking.
Captain Tom's asleep, but don't worry.
I have everything under control.
Evasive maneuvers! Look out, ahh! Now, tell everyone you got your pilot license in Georgia.
My cousin's from Georgia! Clarence?! What's going on?! Oh, hey Chad! Look, I met the pilots! Legally, I don't think we're even supposed to let you in here, but you know live a little! - Yeah, live a little! - What?! No! Mary told me to keep an eye on you.
What's going on in here?! Chad, I told you! Don't worry, ma'am.
It seems your boy was just a little curious perfectly fine! Oh, okay, well.
As long as it's uh Oh! Clarence, hey, we probably shouldn't be in here.
All this stuff looks really complicated and dangerous.
Whoa, there buddy.
I think I know what's going on here.
First time flyer, huh? Never been on a plane? Uh no.
Why don't you have a seat here, next to your boy? Yeah! Next to your boy.
Come on, Chad! I need someone to help me - get us to the mainland.
- Uh, okay.
Whoa.
Oh, wow.
Whoa! See, there's nothing up here to be scared of.
- It's just blue sky and clouds and stuff! - Yep! That, right there, is the whole sky as big as the ocean! Us pilots ride that sky ocean as far as it'll take us.
Yes, sir, the ocean is all you need.
Nothing like the smell of the sea.
Ah.
My father said I'd never be a sailor, and look at me now.
Whoa.
I mean, I've been scared to get on a plane my whole life! I'm gonna travel more.
I'm gonna go places.
I am Chad, and airplanes don't scare me! Yay, Chad! - Oh, my gosh, what are you doing! - Oh, no! Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off! Whoa, there! Take it easy, Chuck Yeager! Uh, Captain Tom? Sir, that guy dumped all our fuel.
I always wondered what that button did.
We need to go back to Aberdale or we're gonna cra Shh! This is a teachable moment! Little boy! Can you land this plane? No.
But I know somebody who can.
I believe in you, Chad.
It's all up to me? Let's do this.
Captain, you cannot be