Dalziel and Pascoe (1996) s02e04 Episode Script
Exit Lines
There's your credit card.
Thank you very much.
Come here.
Yes, sir? I'd like another one of these, please.
Oh Oh, dear! Oh, dear me! What? Ah Dad? Charley AIEEEEEE! Not in here.
Out! Sir? PATIENT MUMBLES - Piss - What's he going on about? Fat man Pissed Right, jump-start him.
Adrenalin.
Can't let him die with an exit line like that.
Charge 200.
Stand clear.
BEEP Pulse check.
No pulse.
Charging to 200.
Stand clear.
Pulse check.
No pulse.
Charging to 360.
Stand clear.
BEEP Pulse check.
No pulse.
CONSTANT BEEP All I'm saying is you have to make the place secure.
Dad, she's two.
She's not planning to join the Foreign Legion! I'm talking about security.
You hear all sorts of stories nowadays.
I can't understand why you haven't got a burglar alarm either.
PHONE RINGS Right.
OK.
If that was the Fat Controller, I hope you told him where to go! No, it was Sergeant Wield.
Oh, well, old smiley would liven us up! Got to go.
You fixed this, didn't you, so you don't have to listen to my father! Planned down to the last second.
Apologise to them for me.
Don't think I'm going to save you any cake! I'm sorry.
Can you tell me how he died? Painfully.
You're not the only one working unsocial hours! Contusions to the head as though someone had struck him and bashed his head against the bath.
Bruised shoulders.
Probably water in the lungs from being held down.
But he didn't drown.
Probable cause of death - heart failure caused by stress.
Not an accident? Don't worry - it's murder.
That gives me no pleasure.
Nor me! I aim to save lives, not lose them.
Another thing we've got in common! What are you doing here, PC Hector? On duty, sir.
My second unnatural death tonight.
What's that? Another forgotten soul.
Knocked off his bike by some fat drunk bastard - quote.
Those were his dying words.
The boss, sir! Wouldn't do to leave me on my own! Have you breathalysed this man yet? Sorry, sir? No, I haven't Isn't it standard in potential drink-drive cases? What are you talking about? Evening, Peter.
What's dragged you away from your family? You know him? Detective Superintendent Dalziel.
Oh, pulling rank, is he? Sorry? That's why he's not been breathalysed.
- I have breathalysed the driver, - He has.
- It were negative.
I'm a teetotaller.
But were you the driver? Yes.
That's not what the deceased implied.
He's dead? Yes! I'm sorry.
Why? It gets rid of the one material witness.
Thank you, Doctor.
What's going on, sir? It was an accident.
Some poor old sod on a bike.
We just didn't see him.
You were in the car, sir? I was indeed.
And well-lubricated to boot.
Sobering up fast now, though.
You'd been drinking? Come on, Peter.
No law says a copper can't have a drink off duty.
As long as he's not driving.
I think we've clarified that point.
So what are you here for, Peter? Not on my behalf, I hope! Murder case.
I'd better tag along.
I need to get a statement, sir.
Yeah, all right.
But don't worry about the spelling, son, or it'll take all night.
.
.
Can you manage without me until the dawn's fair light? Can but try, sir.
Good night, sir.
Is it? .
.
Right, then, Wayne.
Have you got your pencil? Yes, sir.
Good.
Does it have any lead in it? I think so, sir.
Well aren't you the lucky one? Who's the sober judge with the boss? Mr Bancroft.
Runs most of the bookies in Yorkshire.
Any form? A few inquiries.
Always comes up clean as a whistle.
Good job for the fat man he did this time.
Come on, let's solve this before he sobers up.
That gives us a few weeks! You want me to keep you company? I had dinner with you.
I'm not taking you to bed as well! No, thanks.
I'll be all right.
It could've been worse.
Not for that old bugger.
He was probably in for the Tour de France.
We might've killed a champion! He was all over the place.
Perhaps he'd had a drink at his local.
Let's try and avoid making the booze to blame.
Too many doing that already.
It wouldn't have mattered if he was as sober as me in those conditions.
Listen, Andy, if anybody should feel bad, it should be me.
I mean, I was driving, wasn't I? Thanks, Arnie.
I'll give you a ring.
Thought you'd be asleep.
No, Mum and Dad have just gone to bed.
Right.
I asked them to stay on.
What?! Just for a couple of days.
I'm worried about Dad.
He just keeps repeating himself.
He went on and on about alarms and security systems all night.
He didn't seem to know he'd said it all before.
Drink? No It's more than that.
Morning, sir.
Anything? Not yet, sir.
Let's wait for our lord and master.
The chief constable wants to see you.
Pardon? He's waiting for you.
Where? In the conference room.
What's dragged him out of bed? A murder case should be Superintendent Dalziel's.
Not the only great mind we have here, eh? Actually, I believe you bumped into him last night.
Momentarily.
He was witness to a car accident.
Yes Yes yes Did he happen to mention it was his car? No, sir.
Mr Bancroft was driving.
The bookmaker, yes.
I believe they'd been for a meal, sir.
Apparently, they were guests of Major Kassell.
He works for Sir William Pledger at Haycroft Grange.
You're very well informed, sir.
Had the editor of the Chronicle on the phone, first thing.
Not one to cause trouble, but Seems a doctor has been making accusations.
The problem is, Peter, our friend was seen driving his car away by one of the waitresses.
Sure it's a mistake, but I just feel for the moment it might be better for Andy to stay out of the spotlight.
Take a holiday, perhaps, whilst we sort this out discreetly.
"We", sir? You want me to investigate my boss? Not "investigate", absolutely not.
There's no call for a formal inquiry.
But it's best to be prepared.
Wouldn't want to lose a man of Andy's undoubted calibre, would we? Not to mere rumour and speculation.
That's all.
Thank you, Peter.
Thank you, sir.
Oh, Peter, perhaps you could suggest the holiday to Andy? I'm sure it'll come better from you.
Sir.
What's this - a raid? Sorry, sir.
I did try the bell.
You all right? Brilliant.
Drinking isn't good for you.
I'm moved by your concern for my liver.
I'll leave it to you in the will.
Did you bring the bacon? Who says they saw me driving the car? Your waitress.
Were you driving, Andy? I think Mr Bancroft made an excellent statement.
I shouldn't hold Hector's spelling against him.
Oh, come on! This is a crock of the proverbial and you know it.
You seemed very upset.
Of course I was! I don't get my kicks running over geriatrics.
You didn't run over him.
I was in the car.
You know what I mean.
You don't believe me.
I didn't say that.
Have I ever lied to you? Oh, come on, Andy! OK, I might have lied once or twice for a laugh, but this is no joke! No Of course I believe you.
Right, now we've got that out of the way, give me five minutes and we'll get to work.
I don't think that would be wise.
What? We think you should take a holiday till all this blows over.
"We"? Is that the royal we? I knew you were posh.
Where have you been hiding the blue blood? It's a suggestion from the chief constable.
Oh, aye He's a definite "we", he is.
A wee little scrotum! So that's the game? He sees a chance of getting at me.
And he's using you to stab me in the back! It's not like that.
What did he offer you? Your first murder case? What a rising star you are now I'm out the way.
I want you back! Don't Don't make me cry I hate soggy bread.
I'd best be off.
Listen Peter I wasn't driving.
Sir, no-one's accusing you of anything.
Here, come on What? Kiss my cheek, Judas.
Go the whole hog! Andy, I believe you.
Just don't push it too far! Is this a dialect or your normal literary style? Sorry, sir? Just give me the essence of your door-to-door solicitations.
Sir? Get anything at all, Hector? No, sir.
Nobody knows nothing.
Right.
Keep going.
Sir.
.
.
Did we win him in the Lottery? It's his local beat.
That should drive fear into the hearts of the criminals.
Mrs Frostrick's arrived, sir, with Mr Frostrick.
Wheel them in.
You normally phoned your father? Every night.
He was an old man.
He shouldn't have been alone.
It's what he wanted.
He were very independent, like.
What time did you call? First time, about eight.
He didn't answer.
Sometimes he had a bath.
But you called again? About ten.
Then I really began to worry, so I caught the bus.
.
.
Couldn't you have driven your wife, Mr Frostrick? It was a club night British Legion.
When you found your father, did he say anything? Just "Charley".
He thought I was Charley.
Who's? Our lad.
Him and his grand-dad were close.
He talked him into joining the Army.
Best advice he ever gave him.
Got him out the clutches of that tart.
Charley's fiancee.
Not if I've owt to do with it.
What regiment's he in? Mid-Yorkshire Infantry.
The local camp.
So he's not far away, then? No, he's Before you go getting any daft ideas, Inspector he's on manoeuvres, before he goes to Germany.
They don't get days off to go home.
They didn't when I was with them! Mrs Frostrick, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to come round the house with me.
Yes.
Thank you.
Get him out my way.
Shall we check round the back? His medals are missing too.
We'll need a description.
I could draw you a picture.
He was so proud of them.
He was going to leave them to Charley.
The Army's big in your life, is it? Round here, there's not much else.
Shame, really.
Apart from the medals, the radio, the watch, nothing else is missing? Did he have any money in the house? I was always on at him about that but they don't trust banks, do they? Any idea where he might've kept it? There wouldn't have been much.
How do you know? He only had his pension.
He lent our Charley ã500 when he signed up.
What for? An engagement ring.
So your father approved of the relationship, then? Oh, no.
No, he hated her.
The one thing my husband and him had in common.
He wouldn't have given him a brass farthing for her.
He thought he was setting Charley up for the Army.
How do you know this? Charley told me.
He felt bad about it.
But you know what love's like.
Not at ã500 a ring, I don't.
Karen wants the best.
She's that kind of girl.
I'd like to speak to Major Kassell, please, sweetheart.
Don't give that crap! I don't care if he's shooting rhinos in Leeds! I want him and I want him now! Well, give me his bloody mobile number, then! Andy, you can rely on me.
It's my pleasure.
Don't worry about that.
I'll have a word there as well.
Doesn't look like a girl who'd cause too much of a problem.
Might even be able to turn it to my own advantage.
It's nothing.
You scratch my back Invite him.
Sir William's keen to meet you now you've some time on your hands.
Look forward to it.
And don't worry - no problems.
This used to be my bedroom.
We converted it for him.
Well, you need a proper bath, don't you? FOOTSTEPS Dolly? Oh, you're all right, love, you're all right.
.
.
I'll take her for a cuppa.
Aye.
Message from the chief constable, sir, wondering how you were doing.
Where's Frostrick? Checking out the shed.
Check HIM out.
I want to know his alibi holds water, six pints of ale and 40 witnesses.
Make me an appointment at the camp.
His last words could have been the name of the murderer.
KNOCKING Come in.
He shouldn't have gone like that.
It's not right.
No.
Cuppa? I'm out of biscuits.
Thank you.
No.
I owe the taxi, Mam.
Me mam told me.
I came straight away.
I'm sorry, Mrs Frostrick.
Thank you.
Does this mean Charley'll be home? Yes.
Great! Who's this, then? Detective Inspector Pascoe.
This is Karen, Tracey's daughter.
Charley's fiancee.
Nice.
That's how they met - Charley coming round here.
Were you here last night? No, I don't live here.
I work in a hotel.
Well, I did.
You haven't lost your job? I told them where to stuff it.
They treat you like shit! Please! They do! It's not as if they pay you proper! When Charley comes, we'll get wed and I'll go off with him.
Germany must be better than here.
What? I'll marry Charley.
They've got proper living quarters.
He joined up to get away from tramps.
That's not what he says! If you think You mustn't remove items from a crime scene.
You know what you can do, eh? Karen! See this? Them's real! ã500! That's what he thinks of me! TV BLARES INTO LIFE Mam, get the sodding control! ã500?! How the hell did he get ã500? You all right, sir? I've just met love's young dream.
That Frostrick's got a temper on him.
I'm on to it, sir.
No, send Singh.
I'll go to the base.
I want you to see another major, an ex-major.
Kassell - he was with Dalziel.
Then meet me at the Paradise for lunch.
Sir? We deserve some high life.
What are we going to do about them? Get Hector to talk them down.
He's got the local touch.
His father phoned.
Bad business.
We've granted him compassionate leave from today.
Could he have found his way home before now? The moor's misty - he'd have had a job.
Possible, though? Well, we do let the men sleep occasionally.
Actually, he has a bit of a reputation.
In what way? I'll take you to the boys who know - the military police.
Morning, sir.
Sgt Myers, this is DI Pascoe.
One of our lads in trouble? No.
This is merely routine.
The chaps know about routine What do you know about Private Frostrick? Good lad, sir.
Didn't cause us any trouble.
Reports speak of occasional lateness for first parade.
Not enough to add up to more than a day on jankers, picking up leaves.
He probably considered it worth it.
Why's that? Corporal Gillott? - He was shagging some bird who worked in a hotel, sir.
- Beautifully put Thank you, sir She's not after him with a bun in the oven? She may well be after him but that's not my concern.
Thank you.
Inspector Cruikshank? What are you doing here, sir? Freezing my balls off.
Andy sent you? No, just on a routine matter.
Saturday, and I'm stuck here, when City are playing at home Nursemaiding Customs and bloody Excise! What's going on? Somebody's tipped them that the chopper is stacked with heroin.
All very softly, softly - it's owned by Sir William Pledger, and it's full of Euros coming here to kill off the last British wildlife.
I have to stand here while they take it to bits.
Daft game! I was told I'd find a Major Kassell here.
He's the posh-looking reception committee.
Right.
Keep moving around, sir.
Get the blood circulating.
Thank you, Sergeant.
Major Kassell? Sergeant Wield.
Sergeant.
May I have a word? Yes.
I'm here till your lads blow the all-clear.
It's about an incident last night.
The accident? I heard.
Must've shaken poor old Arnie up.
Did you leave the restaurant with Mr Bancroft and Superintendent Dalziel? I stood at the car, waved them off.
So you're clear who was driving? Couldn't be clearer.
Who was driving, sir? Arnie Bancroft, of course.
Who else? PIANO PLAYS IN BACKGROUND Not gone for the set lunch? Half my pension for the ploughman's.
Can't see Andy forking out.
I checked.
Major Kassell paid the bill.
Now, why would he do that? Perhaps he's in love with the Fat Controller.
Anyway, he confirmed Bancroft was driving.
That seems to be it.
There's still the waitress to check.
Why would Kassell lie? What have you got on him? MC for Sir William's estate parties.
They met in Hong Kong ten years ago.
The major was serving there.
Sir William was on business and visited his old regiment.
Which one? Same as Frostrick.
They're all local.
The major was easily tempted to join Sir William's private army.
One thing though, sir.
When I tracked him down he was waiting for Sir William's helicopter.
So was Inspector Cruikshank.
And Customs.
What were they looking for? Heroin.
Did they find any? Not when I left, but it looked like it might take all day.
Can I get you gentlemen anything? Inspector Pascoe would love a portion of your game pie, Stella.
And I'll have the usual liquid lunch.
On its way, Andy.
.
.
What are you two doing here? Had a pay rise during my absence? Could ask you the same question, sir.
Returning to the crime scene.
Come to wipe off my fingerprints.
They're all over lovely Stella here.
Well, nearly all over.
That's not true, actually, but I thought you'd want to give her a once-over with your brush.
.
.
Can I have a word? Look at that! Leaped at the chance.
And him with a bonny wee babe.
Shocking.
He's probably going to ask her if she takes Luncheon Vouchers.
That'll be it, won't it, Sergeant? Always enjoy our conversations.
I'm rather busy, Inspector.
It won't take long.
You didn't see Superintendent Dalziel leave last night, did you? No.
Why? You weren't the waitress? I'm the owner.
Well, the bank graciously lets me put my name over the door.
Is the waitress in? Afraid not.
She quit this morning.
Her name wouldn't be Karen Spillings, would it? Know her? I'm familiar with her.
That sounds the right word for her.
What do you mean? She can be very familiar.
Makes her popular in some circles.
Not in mine, I'm afraid.
Too attentive to the male clientele.
Some of them don't seem to object.
Like your friend.
Can't be bad for business.
I draw the line at entertaining soldiers on the kitchen table at 3am.
Well, they were engaged.
Hmm.
Quite clearly.
What did they do when they saw you? They didn't.
Frankly, I didn't feel it was an appropriate time to introduce VERBAL intercourse.
But you used it to dismiss her? No, I didn't.
As you say, she wasn't altogether bad for business.
PHONE RINGS Excuse me.
I'm rather short-handed.
.
.
Yes? Major Kassell.
How are you? Good morning.
Oh, I had rather a rush on the game pie.
Is there? Oh Thank you.
I appreciate it.
Karen? Did you get anything out of her? No? There's a lot would like to.
But she's got pride.
She carries the weight of the world on her slim, delicate shoulders.
You seem very well informed.
Eat here all the time.
How's the investigation going? Which one? Are there two? The Deeks case.
It's OK.
Is that the full briefing? You're supposed to be on holiday.
Oh, yeah Right.
Clean forgot.
Sorry, lads, can't stop.
Got to go pheasant shooting.
If you see the chief constable, ask him to take a stroll across the moor later on.
I'd like to bag a really big one.
See you, Brutus.
He wouldn't do anything bent, sir, would he? How many times have you heard character witnesses say that? Can we claim for these? Like a lift? No, thank you.
Don't you remember me? Oh, yeah.
You're one of them blokes from last night.
Left me a big tip.
I appreciated the service.
Come on.
Get in.
You never know.
I might even offer you something more than a drive into town.
How did Forensics miss it? The mat was soaking with the splashing about.
Now it's had time to dry, you can see the indentations.
Looks like a footprint.
What else do you conjecture, son? Could be an Army boot.
Frostrick's a big boots man.
Alibi's good - unless he brought the darts team, their wives and food.
They'd have left crumbs.
If they had, Forensics would have missed them.
This is all we've got.
Get an impression.
Already have.
OK.
Let's go play Cinderella.
Could it be an Army boot? Could be.
Could be a work of modern art.
Sign it and see what you get.
.
.
Lance Corporal, show the gentlemen here your footwear.
What? They want to see if we're still polishing them properly.
.
.
Could see your face in them.
.
.
Not that you'd want to! Show him your soles.
Want me to tap-dance as well? Save the floor show till later, eh? Came across one of your ex-officers recently.
Oh, aye? Major Kassell.
Oh You know him? Yeah.
He'd the sense to get out and make a go of it in civvy street.
Doesn't take much sense when it's that or a court martial.
Course, they give him the choice.
Bloody officer! This was the Hong Kong business, was it? Never known a place like it.
Everyone was on the fiddle.
Your lot, my lot and the fat cats with titles.
But nothing was proved, was it? Officers only prove what they want to prove, don't they? That's why I got this far and no more.
I'm not joining that scum.
Inspector What? Come on, lads, let's get some work done round here.
It could be an Army boot, sir.
This is Yorkshire.
Everybody wears boots, including women, children and pit ponies.
It's not a fingerprint, lad, and right now that's what we need.
Dad? Dad! Are you all right? Why shouldn't I be? No, well Do you want another coffee? No, thank you.
DOOR CLOSES You've still got his photo.
Well, he was my godson, Arnie.
I was proud of him.
You should be too.
I'm still angry, Andy.
I can't help it.
Not with him, surely? No.
Oh, I don't know.
We're all allowed one stupid mistake.
But he wasn't, was he? That's the point.
Whatever you do, you can't bring him back.
I know that.
So D'you think they'll take to me? Who? Your rich friends.
Oh Yeah Hey, how come the likes of you get invited to one of Lord Snooty's weekends? Everybody wants a bookmaker for a friend, you should know that.
They're hoping for inside information.
So they'll take to you for the same reason.
Right Arnie, Andy.
Nice you could pop by.
Afraid you missed the shoot.
I only come for the party.
One of the best shots around.
A minute and I'll introduce the Euros, but first Sir William wants to meet you.
Do I have to curtsey? Sir William is self-made.
No airs and graces.
Shame.
I like etiquette.
Yes, I'd noticed Sir William.
This is Detective Superintendent Andy Dalziel.
Sir William.
Nice to see another man in proper shape.
I can't abide all these skeletons in Italian suits.
You do any shooting? No.
The Police Commission frowns on it.
Michael says you're a good man.
Few enough of those around.
Do you like birds? In bed or on the wing? Are you choosy? Can't afford to be.
We'll see what we can do.
.
.
We stock a variety of birds, don't we?.
.
Fix up a date with our friend.
Forgive me, I've got to make Euro chat.
God help me! Fancy a drink? Yeah, why not? HORNS SOUNDING Mary? Dad! Dad! Let me go, love! No, Mum! Get out of the way! Thank you! Mary? How did it go, Tom? They won.
Three-nil.
Three-bloody-nil.
First time all season and I missed it.
I meant with Customs.
Waste of time.
Clean as a whistle.
They hardly had a packet of aspirin on board, never mind heroin.
So Customs have closed the case? Course they have.
Just some malignant sod out to cause trouble.
And ruin my weekend.
Tell Andy to do his own dirty work next time.
What's he got to do with it? He's been working with Customs.
Doesn't he tell you anything? I thought you worked for him.
We've been rather preoccupied lately Aye, wasting my time! You made a hit with Sir William.
He made an impression on me as well.
Everything OK with the helicopter? Great.
It needed a thorough clean! What happens to these, then? Can't eat them all.
Market economy.
See the van? Vernon Briggs.
He buys them from us and sells them to you at some exorbitant price.
Didn't I eat one last night? Paradise Hall get them cheap.
Useful to keep your local dinery happy as I think you may appreciate.
So, some get cleaned off the top.
And the victors get a brace each.
Here you go.
I didn't shoot them.
Who's counting? She's done what? Phoned the paper.
Retracted her statement.
Said with the rain and everything, she could easily have been mistaken.
Our revered detective superintendent is spotless again Just like his shirts.
Yes, sir.
You don't look too pleased at having him back in the driving seat, so to speak.
I'm delighted, sir.
Of course you are.
As are we all.
Anything new on the Deeks' case? A glass slipper, sir.
what am I supposed to do with these buggers? Cook them? They won't fit under the grill.
Stuff them and make bookends.
I'd have to buy another book! Hector! Stand, boy! Stand! What are you doing here? It's me half-day, sir.
What are you doing? I'm a beater, sir.
Get away! Only part-time, like.
The odd weekend.
Do you have another job I'm not in trouble, am I, sir? I've done it since I was a kid, like.
Half the lads do.
They pay good money.
I suppose it could be seen as additional training.
Going in single file against armed men.
They shoot at the birds, sir, not at us.
Don't bet on it, sonny - not with me around! Everybody gets lost in supermarkets.
How would you know I'm not getting into one of those.
I'm not in the mood.
He was wandering round the car park.
He said he was looking for the car.
If he'd said he was looking for dinosaurs A Hillman Minx, a Hillman Minx.
He sold that car when I was six.
Where is he now? Mum's taken him up to bed.
What's she saying? If I could talk to her, my life would have been totally different.
Soon, you'll need to sit down with her and DOORBELL Happy birthday! Where's my little god-daughter, then? Her birthday was yesterday.
A mere technicality.
So, here we are, then.
Wet the baby's head.
Have you got any orange juice? We could make a buck's fizz.
That's tricky to say if you've had a drink.
Almost as difficult as "plucking pheasants".
Abracadabra! Fancy one of these? I'm a vegetarian.
Pluck them, then.
Make the girl a Pocah-thingy head-dress.
I'd have loved one these as a kid.
I'm going to lie down - headache.
Has she been using that line long? It was one of my wife's favourites.
It doesn't augur well, Peter.
I'll leave you these and you and the baby can have them on Sunday.
What do you want? I thought you'd never ask.
The usual.
I can't stand this bubbly.
It makes terrible noises in the night.
Where did you get those? You told me to have a holiday.
I've taken up country pursuits.
Doesn't sound like you.
I'm starting a new life.
I think your old one wants you back.
Oh? How's that, then? Your waitress has retracted her statement.
You don't seem surprised.
Why should I be? I was innocent, my lord.
You knew your new friends were being investigated by Customs? Is that another case you're working on? I thought the murder inquiry was keeping you busy.
You don't want to get involved in too many things.
It clouds the mind.
So, now brief me properly, sunshine.
And, er, no ice this time.
Come on! He may be a pain, but whatever else Andy is, he's as straight as a die.
People change.
Old age is staring him in the face and what's he got to meet it with? A cop's pension and an empty house.
And you reckon he wants to fill it with pheasants.
No, you're wrong.
I'm sure there's a logical explanation.
Give me one.
CLATTERING What's that? Probably Andy pissing on the herbaceous borders.
Peter! BABY CRIES I got him! Mary, I got him! I got him! Our baby's safe, our little Ellie's safe.
Call the police, Mary.
No need.
Dad, what have you done? .
.
Peter, are you all right? Who's that, Mary? It's Ellie, Dad.
I'm OK No Ellie? It can't be! Are you all right? Brilliant, bloody brilliant! Oh Do me ten copies of this missing items list.
Found this Any news? Charley Frostrick arrived home last night.
Have you circulated that list of missing items? On to it now, sir.
Find anything I missed briefing you on, sir? No But then I wouldn't, would I? What's that? Personal matter.
Hit you with the hardback version of The Female Eunuch? Lucky it was only your head.
Nowadays they seem to take shears to the more sensitive parts.
Like me to investigate? No, thank you, sir.
I wouldn't interfere in any case you didn't want me to.
Thought I'd pop in now and then to make sure you're OK.
Between social commitments? Exactly.
I knew you'd understand.
It's not half bad.
It's better than being on the dole and living at home.
Long as I don't have to shoot anyone.
Isn't that rather the point of being in the Army? Not for me.
Mind you, if I find out who did this to Grand-dad You'd tell us, wouldn't you? Happens.
Are you getting married? Point of being engaged, innit? Your father doesn't seem too happy about it.
From what I can gather, neither was your grand-dad.
It's my life.
You seen Karen yet? No.
I were late last night.
I'd have gone round, but you know what families are like.
Old-fashioned ideas.
Always been a problem.
Still, you managed to find places, eh? Well, you do, don't you? Right, shall we go? What do you want me to do? Have a look around.
Your mother was great, but you might spot something else.
Righto.
D'you mind if I go round on me own? I feel a bit funny Of course.
.
.
Karen! .
.
Sorry, sir.
No, I'm sorry.
But I am rather busy.
He wants me to take a quick butcher's round the house.
I could talk to Karen while we're waiting.
Gran's day at the hospital.
Got the house to myself for five minutes.
Bloody awful here on this thing.
Not even a proper sofa bed.
No doubt you'll soon have a nice billet in Baden-Baden.
Why did you retract your statement, Karen? About what? Oh, you mean the paper? Well, I were wrong.
Initially, I understand you were absolutely positive.
Well, I changed my mind - woman's prerogative.
BANGING Any chance of a cup of tea? I was just checking it were still there.
Nobody said owt, so I just wondered.
Who was there to say? Who else knew? Only me.
I never told nobody.
Did your grandfather show you? No I spied on him when I come for the money for the ring I shouldn't have done that, should I? You should've told me about this.
I wasn't going to nick it.
I mean, it's me mam's now, isn't it? I wouldn't nick from me mam.
You think I did it, don't you? I couldn't have killed Grand-dad.
Never! Not in a million years.
No, Charley, I don't believe you would.
Come on.
Someone's waiting for you next door.
I've just double-checked, Michael.
The Customs boys have given up so you're all right for tomorrow.
And so am I.
Yeah.
I'm really looking forward to it.
I'll see you there.
Thought you'd gone, sir.
Sorry to disappoint you.
Do I disappoint you, Peter? Excuse me, sir.
The medals have turned up at Edwin Sutton Antiques, Leystone.
That old rogue! What's he up to? Probably thinks it'll get us off his back.
You know him, sir? Oh, yeah.
One of the great fences of our time.
Olympic class.
Not that we've ever been able to nail him with anything.
Another of our respectable citizens.
Did Sutton serve the man himself? Yes, sir.
Bring him in.
Let's see if we can get an ID.
Sir.
Thanks for the background info, sir.
That's what I'm here for to bring enlightenment to the downcast.
Talking of respectable citizens, what's the SP on Mr Bancroft? Thought you'd never ask, Peter.
Or were you just being coy? Arnie and I go way back.
Used to play rugby together.
Then I turned to a life of crime and he turned to other turf.
He had a son.
Proverbial apple of his eye.
Bright lad.
Not unlike you, actually.
A bit pushy.
Got in with the wrong bunch.
Died.
How? Car accident.
They do happen, Peter.
Is that all? What more do you want? Go on, son.
Go earn your medals.
I've got phone calls to make.
Arnie? He were only in two minutes.
But you think you might remember him? I might, but I doubt it.
Male, white, tall, uncertain age.
Not much of a description, is it, Mr Sutton? Show me a piece of Dresden porcelain for 10 seconds, I'll tell you it all, right down to the buckles on the shoes - because that's my trade! Could he have been a soldier? Well, he wasn't carrying a rifle, but, yeah, he could have been anything.
Sir? Yeah? Charley Frostrick's arrived, sir.
Look, can I go now? Inspector.
Are these your grandfather's medals? Oh, aye Definite.
So you got him, then? Not yet.
These were sold to a local antique shop.
How much did he get? Thirty pounds.
Thirty quid? He killed my grand-dad for ã30? Look at these! I mean, he fought in Tobruk El Alamein You know, he used to say, "I fought for lads like you.
" He used to drive me bonkers.
But he did, didn't he? And what did they give him, eh? Thirty quid.
Has Karen come with you? No.
No, she gave me the bum's rush.
My picture of army life didn't take her fancy.
She's gone off for another job up at the Grange.
The Grange? How did SHE get a job up there? Did she return the ring? You're better off without her, Charley.
Yeah, everybody says that.
But I love her.
Well, you wanted her.
I understand it.
Most men might be tempted to spend the night with her at Paradise Hall.
Never went there.
She wouldn't have it.
The best I got was Grand-dad's shed.
What? Can I can I take these? Not at the moment.
Charley.
You'll get everything you deserve, Charley.
Eventually.
Just hold on.
PHONE RINGS Yeah? Yes, Inspector? If I can, of course.
Yes, but I didn't stay around long enough to see his face.
That he was a soldier is all I can be sure of.
He may not have been ready for inspection but he was in uniform.
When? Night before your boss came in for dinner.
No, not at all.
Glad to be of help.
Tell Sutton he's going on an outing.
What's going on? We're taking our witness to see some soldiers.
There are over 600 men there.
Then get Trott to organise a parade.
Shall I come? No need, sir.
I've coped all right this far.
That's a matter of opinion.
This could be dangerous.
The Army All we're going to do is see if anyone jogs your memory.
It's safe.
You can't force me.
I'm a law-abiding citizen.
Of course, sir.
You're free not to co-operate.
If you like, we can go back and get the warrant.
What warrant? I'm not getting out the car.
Just tell us if you see the man.
Back again? Thinking of joining up? It had crossed my mind.
We're here to see Captain Trott.
Right, sir.
I'll phone through.
How many are there? Get him! Hey! You'll pay for that door! I've just got this car back! .
.
Still coping all right without me, are you? So I sold some medals for a mate - so what, Inspector? What was the name of your little friend? Can't tell you, sir.
No names, no pack drill.
Got a code of honour in the Army.
It's called loyalty.
Does it extend to old soldiers who get bashed to death in their bath? Don't know owt about that.
.
.
Lock him up for the night.
You run a nicer place here than we do, sir.
What time's breakfast? Interview terminated at 17.
08.
At least we got him for firing at an officer.
I want him for murder! Let's try Lolita.
That cow told you what? All I want is the name of the soldier.
I was faithful to Charley.
I'd never have done owt like that.
She's making it up.
Why would Mrs Abbiss do that? Cos she's old and jealous.
She saw something, Karen.
Dirty dreams.
Nowt to do with me.
Did you mention to the soldier that your neighbour maybe had some money salted away? There was no soldier.
You're not listening to me! Can I go now? I'm starting my new job tonight and I daren't be late.
Go on.
How much do you think she was involved? How much can we prove? .
.
Well? Fingerprints don't match Gillott's.
He's too smart for that.
He'd have been wearing his little white gloves - smart.
He's the sort likes to impress girls in his uniform.
What next, sir? Get his boots off him.
Strange - don't seem to be any Customs with us today.
Probably sleeping in.
They've been working hard lately.
Haven't they just? Great day for a shoot.
Aye.
Perfect.
Sir! 12.
02.
Detective Inspector Pascoe has entered the room.
.
.
At ease, Corporal.
At ease.
Breakfast to your liking? Bacon wasn't crisp enough, sir.
Well, we must make a note of that.
And I'd appreciate your comment on these, Corporal.
For the tape - a pair of Army boots.
Wouldn't pass muster, sir.
And why's that? Need their morning spit and polish.
They look clean enough to me on the surface.
But that's all it is with you, Lance Corporal - surface bull.
Our lads may not be very hot on spit and polish, but we're very sharp on deep-down dirt.
You left your mark on the bathroom mat and the bathroom mat left its mark on you.
Tiny Microscopic.
But enough to put you in the frame.
Sit down, son.
You're not in the Army now.
Excellent! Charley told me about her.
Bragging away when I put him in jankers.
Then she came to wave him off on manoeuvres.
And all smudged mascara, but eyes on the look-out for a better mark.
Piece of piss, as long as you had money to jangle.
We went on a 24-hour bender - and I mean bender - all over the shop, booze and bonk all the way.
Then she starts flashing this bleeding ring.
Said she knows where there's a fortune stashed away.
She'd seen her boyfriend "get a wad from this old fart".
She knew he kept a spare key in his shed and we waited there.
Passed the time quite nicely Till we see the bathroom light come on.
We let ourselves in, we started going round the house.
In the bedroom, he must've heard us.
He starts calling, "Charley? Charley?" So I went in and gave him Charley But he were too daft to tell us owt.
Some blokes got no brains.
Then you went downstairs.
Tried to make it look like a burglary.
Then she strolls off to work.
Cool as a cucumber.
It were all her.
She set me up.
She got me drunk.
I could've been anybody.
She's the one that really did the murder.
Loyalty, eh Not to a woman! They never give you any, do they? PARTY HUBBUB Having a nice time? See you later.
Another, please, darling.
My pleasure.
Need to get your hands round something hot after a long day.
I bet! Haven't we met before? You were using that line 30 years ago.
It never worked then.
You might be lucky this time.
.
.
Excuse me I need to pay the beaters.
I suppose we could always do them for running a knocking-shop.
What - and spoil the party? Oh, no, I wouldn't want to do that.
Oi! You've got style, Andy, nothing but style.
Ta.
We're lost.
Oh, no, sir.
No, no Not exactly.
There's a lane somewhere here One there.
Will that do? Perfect.
Let's live in hope.
How long is this lane? About three miles, sir.
Come on.
Let's get there in style.
SIREN WAILS Responsible citizen.
Glad there are some left.
What the? Phone! Hand me the bleeding phone! I thought you'd be more interested in indoor attractions.
Nothing like watching others slave in the cold while you're warm.
PHONE RINGS Think it might be you.
Excuse me.
No rest for the wicked! Dalziel.
Shit! Go for it.
Not much point doing much else.
Not bad news, I hope? You better come with me.
SIREN WAILS I hope this isn't going to be embarrassing.
So do I What's happening, Michael? Nothing.
They've come to arrest one of the maids.
Seems a bit mob-handed.
She's in the hall.
Thank you, sir.
.
.
Go on.
You! Here! - You read her her rights? - Just cuff her, Sarge! Please! Sorry, sir, didn't mean to spoil your party.
You have! You know that little van you frightened in the lane? Yes.
That was to be our link to the whole drug chain.
We need the big boys who get it on to the street.
That van was going to lead us all the way down the line until you and the cavalry rode in! Here we go! Come on! You'd better start praying! What the hell are you playing at? We believe one of your helicopters is being used to smuggle heroin.
Do you know what you're saying? Do YOU, sir? My bet is you know everything but you're too canny to put your fingerprints on it.
You let others do that.
A word to the troops while you stand back and whistle.
You'll be clean More's the pity! But it's different for the major, innit? .
.
Constable, come here.
Watch him.
.
.
You too, Arnie.
Lots of guns around.
My pleasure.
Did you know Arnie's son died in a car accident? Yeah.
The autopsy found he'd had a heroin overdose Did you know that? Course he did.
.
.
You were his boss, weren't you? Said you'd look after him.
That's what I believed.
Till I said what Customs were on to.
A whole new picture.
Arnie's son died of heroin.
What's that got to do with me? .
.
Come on.
.
.
Get Rin Tin Tin in the stables.
Check the pheasant packing.
You have no right to do this! Don't be stupid! I'm going to make a phone call.
Guess who to.
Your friend - the chief constable.
Everyone against the wall! Move those men in.
Right back against the wall! You check in there.
Come on! Get your backs into it! Get those bloody boxes open! Must be around here somewhere.
Don't play with it, lad! Get it open! It was going like a dream.
Arnie got me in with the boys.
They like a bent policeman in the house.
Just had to prove it to them.
Then the accident.
Looked like the cloud that had the silver lining.
Not for the old guy Were you driving the car? I got to the end of the drive.
Arnie threatened to hit me with me spare bottle.
Not the man to risk that, so we changed over.
That's the truth.
Why didn't you tell me? Would you have believed me? Why should you? Truth is I would have driven without old Arnie.
Anyway, you not believing helped.
Getting the major to perjure himself and sort out the waitress It couldn't have been more perfect if we'd planned it.
Kassell thinks he has a copper in his pocket.
It would've been ungrateful not to return the favour.
So, "Clear flight, Major, guaranteed.
" "Thanks.
Join the party.
" Only problem now is I think we might be at a wake.
Get off me! This is great Hello, Karen.
Why all the fuss? He was practically dead anyway! She gets around, doesn't she? You can say that again.
You coming back, sir? No, I'm staying here.
Go! No need for you to get shit on your shoes.
I'm staying.
I spoke to your superior.
Oh, aye? And what did the Almighty say? You better be right in your assumptions.
Nothing! It's clean.
Right Wrap it up.
It's clean.
You can all go home.
Does this mean I can return to my normal duties? Let's go.
You're not letting him away with it? Arnie, please, get in the car.
I hope you won't get your equivalent of a court martial.
You bastard! Don't be a bad loser, Arnie.
You know you really shouldn't bet unless you're sure you're going to win.
The car.
Hector! Stay, boy! Stay! Just knocking off, sir.
Got paid? Yes, sir.
My, lad! Haven't you put on weight? Must be one of the perks of the job.
Yes, sir.
Open up.
Oh, laddie, laddie! Nobody wanted these, sir.
What? What do you think this is? Dunno.
Giblets, sir? Giblets? Yes, sir.
They always come in a little plastic bag.
You know, son, you've got the brains to make chief constable.
Thank you, sir.
Walkies, Hector! Heel! No, Arnie! NO! I'll drive.
Very well.
See you.
Look after your daughter, Peter.
It won't be long before you lose her.
What did he say? Just goodbye.
I did everything wrong.
I'd have done the same.
No You would never have involved a mate, like Arnie.
Textbook stuff, that.
My mistake.
It's not even me who has to pay.
Do you think that's going to help? Go away.
Are you deaf? So? We do have work to do sir.
BBC Scotland 1997
Thank you very much.
Come here.
Yes, sir? I'd like another one of these, please.
Oh Oh, dear! Oh, dear me! What? Ah Dad? Charley AIEEEEEE! Not in here.
Out! Sir? PATIENT MUMBLES - Piss - What's he going on about? Fat man Pissed Right, jump-start him.
Adrenalin.
Can't let him die with an exit line like that.
Charge 200.
Stand clear.
BEEP Pulse check.
No pulse.
Charging to 200.
Stand clear.
Pulse check.
No pulse.
Charging to 360.
Stand clear.
BEEP Pulse check.
No pulse.
CONSTANT BEEP All I'm saying is you have to make the place secure.
Dad, she's two.
She's not planning to join the Foreign Legion! I'm talking about security.
You hear all sorts of stories nowadays.
I can't understand why you haven't got a burglar alarm either.
PHONE RINGS Right.
OK.
If that was the Fat Controller, I hope you told him where to go! No, it was Sergeant Wield.
Oh, well, old smiley would liven us up! Got to go.
You fixed this, didn't you, so you don't have to listen to my father! Planned down to the last second.
Apologise to them for me.
Don't think I'm going to save you any cake! I'm sorry.
Can you tell me how he died? Painfully.
You're not the only one working unsocial hours! Contusions to the head as though someone had struck him and bashed his head against the bath.
Bruised shoulders.
Probably water in the lungs from being held down.
But he didn't drown.
Probable cause of death - heart failure caused by stress.
Not an accident? Don't worry - it's murder.
That gives me no pleasure.
Nor me! I aim to save lives, not lose them.
Another thing we've got in common! What are you doing here, PC Hector? On duty, sir.
My second unnatural death tonight.
What's that? Another forgotten soul.
Knocked off his bike by some fat drunk bastard - quote.
Those were his dying words.
The boss, sir! Wouldn't do to leave me on my own! Have you breathalysed this man yet? Sorry, sir? No, I haven't Isn't it standard in potential drink-drive cases? What are you talking about? Evening, Peter.
What's dragged you away from your family? You know him? Detective Superintendent Dalziel.
Oh, pulling rank, is he? Sorry? That's why he's not been breathalysed.
- I have breathalysed the driver, - He has.
- It were negative.
I'm a teetotaller.
But were you the driver? Yes.
That's not what the deceased implied.
He's dead? Yes! I'm sorry.
Why? It gets rid of the one material witness.
Thank you, Doctor.
What's going on, sir? It was an accident.
Some poor old sod on a bike.
We just didn't see him.
You were in the car, sir? I was indeed.
And well-lubricated to boot.
Sobering up fast now, though.
You'd been drinking? Come on, Peter.
No law says a copper can't have a drink off duty.
As long as he's not driving.
I think we've clarified that point.
So what are you here for, Peter? Not on my behalf, I hope! Murder case.
I'd better tag along.
I need to get a statement, sir.
Yeah, all right.
But don't worry about the spelling, son, or it'll take all night.
.
.
Can you manage without me until the dawn's fair light? Can but try, sir.
Good night, sir.
Is it? .
.
Right, then, Wayne.
Have you got your pencil? Yes, sir.
Good.
Does it have any lead in it? I think so, sir.
Well aren't you the lucky one? Who's the sober judge with the boss? Mr Bancroft.
Runs most of the bookies in Yorkshire.
Any form? A few inquiries.
Always comes up clean as a whistle.
Good job for the fat man he did this time.
Come on, let's solve this before he sobers up.
That gives us a few weeks! You want me to keep you company? I had dinner with you.
I'm not taking you to bed as well! No, thanks.
I'll be all right.
It could've been worse.
Not for that old bugger.
He was probably in for the Tour de France.
We might've killed a champion! He was all over the place.
Perhaps he'd had a drink at his local.
Let's try and avoid making the booze to blame.
Too many doing that already.
It wouldn't have mattered if he was as sober as me in those conditions.
Listen, Andy, if anybody should feel bad, it should be me.
I mean, I was driving, wasn't I? Thanks, Arnie.
I'll give you a ring.
Thought you'd be asleep.
No, Mum and Dad have just gone to bed.
Right.
I asked them to stay on.
What?! Just for a couple of days.
I'm worried about Dad.
He just keeps repeating himself.
He went on and on about alarms and security systems all night.
He didn't seem to know he'd said it all before.
Drink? No It's more than that.
Morning, sir.
Anything? Not yet, sir.
Let's wait for our lord and master.
The chief constable wants to see you.
Pardon? He's waiting for you.
Where? In the conference room.
What's dragged him out of bed? A murder case should be Superintendent Dalziel's.
Not the only great mind we have here, eh? Actually, I believe you bumped into him last night.
Momentarily.
He was witness to a car accident.
Yes Yes yes Did he happen to mention it was his car? No, sir.
Mr Bancroft was driving.
The bookmaker, yes.
I believe they'd been for a meal, sir.
Apparently, they were guests of Major Kassell.
He works for Sir William Pledger at Haycroft Grange.
You're very well informed, sir.
Had the editor of the Chronicle on the phone, first thing.
Not one to cause trouble, but Seems a doctor has been making accusations.
The problem is, Peter, our friend was seen driving his car away by one of the waitresses.
Sure it's a mistake, but I just feel for the moment it might be better for Andy to stay out of the spotlight.
Take a holiday, perhaps, whilst we sort this out discreetly.
"We", sir? You want me to investigate my boss? Not "investigate", absolutely not.
There's no call for a formal inquiry.
But it's best to be prepared.
Wouldn't want to lose a man of Andy's undoubted calibre, would we? Not to mere rumour and speculation.
That's all.
Thank you, Peter.
Thank you, sir.
Oh, Peter, perhaps you could suggest the holiday to Andy? I'm sure it'll come better from you.
Sir.
What's this - a raid? Sorry, sir.
I did try the bell.
You all right? Brilliant.
Drinking isn't good for you.
I'm moved by your concern for my liver.
I'll leave it to you in the will.
Did you bring the bacon? Who says they saw me driving the car? Your waitress.
Were you driving, Andy? I think Mr Bancroft made an excellent statement.
I shouldn't hold Hector's spelling against him.
Oh, come on! This is a crock of the proverbial and you know it.
You seemed very upset.
Of course I was! I don't get my kicks running over geriatrics.
You didn't run over him.
I was in the car.
You know what I mean.
You don't believe me.
I didn't say that.
Have I ever lied to you? Oh, come on, Andy! OK, I might have lied once or twice for a laugh, but this is no joke! No Of course I believe you.
Right, now we've got that out of the way, give me five minutes and we'll get to work.
I don't think that would be wise.
What? We think you should take a holiday till all this blows over.
"We"? Is that the royal we? I knew you were posh.
Where have you been hiding the blue blood? It's a suggestion from the chief constable.
Oh, aye He's a definite "we", he is.
A wee little scrotum! So that's the game? He sees a chance of getting at me.
And he's using you to stab me in the back! It's not like that.
What did he offer you? Your first murder case? What a rising star you are now I'm out the way.
I want you back! Don't Don't make me cry I hate soggy bread.
I'd best be off.
Listen Peter I wasn't driving.
Sir, no-one's accusing you of anything.
Here, come on What? Kiss my cheek, Judas.
Go the whole hog! Andy, I believe you.
Just don't push it too far! Is this a dialect or your normal literary style? Sorry, sir? Just give me the essence of your door-to-door solicitations.
Sir? Get anything at all, Hector? No, sir.
Nobody knows nothing.
Right.
Keep going.
Sir.
.
.
Did we win him in the Lottery? It's his local beat.
That should drive fear into the hearts of the criminals.
Mrs Frostrick's arrived, sir, with Mr Frostrick.
Wheel them in.
You normally phoned your father? Every night.
He was an old man.
He shouldn't have been alone.
It's what he wanted.
He were very independent, like.
What time did you call? First time, about eight.
He didn't answer.
Sometimes he had a bath.
But you called again? About ten.
Then I really began to worry, so I caught the bus.
.
.
Couldn't you have driven your wife, Mr Frostrick? It was a club night British Legion.
When you found your father, did he say anything? Just "Charley".
He thought I was Charley.
Who's? Our lad.
Him and his grand-dad were close.
He talked him into joining the Army.
Best advice he ever gave him.
Got him out the clutches of that tart.
Charley's fiancee.
Not if I've owt to do with it.
What regiment's he in? Mid-Yorkshire Infantry.
The local camp.
So he's not far away, then? No, he's Before you go getting any daft ideas, Inspector he's on manoeuvres, before he goes to Germany.
They don't get days off to go home.
They didn't when I was with them! Mrs Frostrick, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to come round the house with me.
Yes.
Thank you.
Get him out my way.
Shall we check round the back? His medals are missing too.
We'll need a description.
I could draw you a picture.
He was so proud of them.
He was going to leave them to Charley.
The Army's big in your life, is it? Round here, there's not much else.
Shame, really.
Apart from the medals, the radio, the watch, nothing else is missing? Did he have any money in the house? I was always on at him about that but they don't trust banks, do they? Any idea where he might've kept it? There wouldn't have been much.
How do you know? He only had his pension.
He lent our Charley ã500 when he signed up.
What for? An engagement ring.
So your father approved of the relationship, then? Oh, no.
No, he hated her.
The one thing my husband and him had in common.
He wouldn't have given him a brass farthing for her.
He thought he was setting Charley up for the Army.
How do you know this? Charley told me.
He felt bad about it.
But you know what love's like.
Not at ã500 a ring, I don't.
Karen wants the best.
She's that kind of girl.
I'd like to speak to Major Kassell, please, sweetheart.
Don't give that crap! I don't care if he's shooting rhinos in Leeds! I want him and I want him now! Well, give me his bloody mobile number, then! Andy, you can rely on me.
It's my pleasure.
Don't worry about that.
I'll have a word there as well.
Doesn't look like a girl who'd cause too much of a problem.
Might even be able to turn it to my own advantage.
It's nothing.
You scratch my back Invite him.
Sir William's keen to meet you now you've some time on your hands.
Look forward to it.
And don't worry - no problems.
This used to be my bedroom.
We converted it for him.
Well, you need a proper bath, don't you? FOOTSTEPS Dolly? Oh, you're all right, love, you're all right.
.
.
I'll take her for a cuppa.
Aye.
Message from the chief constable, sir, wondering how you were doing.
Where's Frostrick? Checking out the shed.
Check HIM out.
I want to know his alibi holds water, six pints of ale and 40 witnesses.
Make me an appointment at the camp.
His last words could have been the name of the murderer.
KNOCKING Come in.
He shouldn't have gone like that.
It's not right.
No.
Cuppa? I'm out of biscuits.
Thank you.
No.
I owe the taxi, Mam.
Me mam told me.
I came straight away.
I'm sorry, Mrs Frostrick.
Thank you.
Does this mean Charley'll be home? Yes.
Great! Who's this, then? Detective Inspector Pascoe.
This is Karen, Tracey's daughter.
Charley's fiancee.
Nice.
That's how they met - Charley coming round here.
Were you here last night? No, I don't live here.
I work in a hotel.
Well, I did.
You haven't lost your job? I told them where to stuff it.
They treat you like shit! Please! They do! It's not as if they pay you proper! When Charley comes, we'll get wed and I'll go off with him.
Germany must be better than here.
What? I'll marry Charley.
They've got proper living quarters.
He joined up to get away from tramps.
That's not what he says! If you think You mustn't remove items from a crime scene.
You know what you can do, eh? Karen! See this? Them's real! ã500! That's what he thinks of me! TV BLARES INTO LIFE Mam, get the sodding control! ã500?! How the hell did he get ã500? You all right, sir? I've just met love's young dream.
That Frostrick's got a temper on him.
I'm on to it, sir.
No, send Singh.
I'll go to the base.
I want you to see another major, an ex-major.
Kassell - he was with Dalziel.
Then meet me at the Paradise for lunch.
Sir? We deserve some high life.
What are we going to do about them? Get Hector to talk them down.
He's got the local touch.
His father phoned.
Bad business.
We've granted him compassionate leave from today.
Could he have found his way home before now? The moor's misty - he'd have had a job.
Possible, though? Well, we do let the men sleep occasionally.
Actually, he has a bit of a reputation.
In what way? I'll take you to the boys who know - the military police.
Morning, sir.
Sgt Myers, this is DI Pascoe.
One of our lads in trouble? No.
This is merely routine.
The chaps know about routine What do you know about Private Frostrick? Good lad, sir.
Didn't cause us any trouble.
Reports speak of occasional lateness for first parade.
Not enough to add up to more than a day on jankers, picking up leaves.
He probably considered it worth it.
Why's that? Corporal Gillott? - He was shagging some bird who worked in a hotel, sir.
- Beautifully put Thank you, sir She's not after him with a bun in the oven? She may well be after him but that's not my concern.
Thank you.
Inspector Cruikshank? What are you doing here, sir? Freezing my balls off.
Andy sent you? No, just on a routine matter.
Saturday, and I'm stuck here, when City are playing at home Nursemaiding Customs and bloody Excise! What's going on? Somebody's tipped them that the chopper is stacked with heroin.
All very softly, softly - it's owned by Sir William Pledger, and it's full of Euros coming here to kill off the last British wildlife.
I have to stand here while they take it to bits.
Daft game! I was told I'd find a Major Kassell here.
He's the posh-looking reception committee.
Right.
Keep moving around, sir.
Get the blood circulating.
Thank you, Sergeant.
Major Kassell? Sergeant Wield.
Sergeant.
May I have a word? Yes.
I'm here till your lads blow the all-clear.
It's about an incident last night.
The accident? I heard.
Must've shaken poor old Arnie up.
Did you leave the restaurant with Mr Bancroft and Superintendent Dalziel? I stood at the car, waved them off.
So you're clear who was driving? Couldn't be clearer.
Who was driving, sir? Arnie Bancroft, of course.
Who else? PIANO PLAYS IN BACKGROUND Not gone for the set lunch? Half my pension for the ploughman's.
Can't see Andy forking out.
I checked.
Major Kassell paid the bill.
Now, why would he do that? Perhaps he's in love with the Fat Controller.
Anyway, he confirmed Bancroft was driving.
That seems to be it.
There's still the waitress to check.
Why would Kassell lie? What have you got on him? MC for Sir William's estate parties.
They met in Hong Kong ten years ago.
The major was serving there.
Sir William was on business and visited his old regiment.
Which one? Same as Frostrick.
They're all local.
The major was easily tempted to join Sir William's private army.
One thing though, sir.
When I tracked him down he was waiting for Sir William's helicopter.
So was Inspector Cruikshank.
And Customs.
What were they looking for? Heroin.
Did they find any? Not when I left, but it looked like it might take all day.
Can I get you gentlemen anything? Inspector Pascoe would love a portion of your game pie, Stella.
And I'll have the usual liquid lunch.
On its way, Andy.
.
.
What are you two doing here? Had a pay rise during my absence? Could ask you the same question, sir.
Returning to the crime scene.
Come to wipe off my fingerprints.
They're all over lovely Stella here.
Well, nearly all over.
That's not true, actually, but I thought you'd want to give her a once-over with your brush.
.
.
Can I have a word? Look at that! Leaped at the chance.
And him with a bonny wee babe.
Shocking.
He's probably going to ask her if she takes Luncheon Vouchers.
That'll be it, won't it, Sergeant? Always enjoy our conversations.
I'm rather busy, Inspector.
It won't take long.
You didn't see Superintendent Dalziel leave last night, did you? No.
Why? You weren't the waitress? I'm the owner.
Well, the bank graciously lets me put my name over the door.
Is the waitress in? Afraid not.
She quit this morning.
Her name wouldn't be Karen Spillings, would it? Know her? I'm familiar with her.
That sounds the right word for her.
What do you mean? She can be very familiar.
Makes her popular in some circles.
Not in mine, I'm afraid.
Too attentive to the male clientele.
Some of them don't seem to object.
Like your friend.
Can't be bad for business.
I draw the line at entertaining soldiers on the kitchen table at 3am.
Well, they were engaged.
Hmm.
Quite clearly.
What did they do when they saw you? They didn't.
Frankly, I didn't feel it was an appropriate time to introduce VERBAL intercourse.
But you used it to dismiss her? No, I didn't.
As you say, she wasn't altogether bad for business.
PHONE RINGS Excuse me.
I'm rather short-handed.
.
.
Yes? Major Kassell.
How are you? Good morning.
Oh, I had rather a rush on the game pie.
Is there? Oh Thank you.
I appreciate it.
Karen? Did you get anything out of her? No? There's a lot would like to.
But she's got pride.
She carries the weight of the world on her slim, delicate shoulders.
You seem very well informed.
Eat here all the time.
How's the investigation going? Which one? Are there two? The Deeks case.
It's OK.
Is that the full briefing? You're supposed to be on holiday.
Oh, yeah Right.
Clean forgot.
Sorry, lads, can't stop.
Got to go pheasant shooting.
If you see the chief constable, ask him to take a stroll across the moor later on.
I'd like to bag a really big one.
See you, Brutus.
He wouldn't do anything bent, sir, would he? How many times have you heard character witnesses say that? Can we claim for these? Like a lift? No, thank you.
Don't you remember me? Oh, yeah.
You're one of them blokes from last night.
Left me a big tip.
I appreciated the service.
Come on.
Get in.
You never know.
I might even offer you something more than a drive into town.
How did Forensics miss it? The mat was soaking with the splashing about.
Now it's had time to dry, you can see the indentations.
Looks like a footprint.
What else do you conjecture, son? Could be an Army boot.
Frostrick's a big boots man.
Alibi's good - unless he brought the darts team, their wives and food.
They'd have left crumbs.
If they had, Forensics would have missed them.
This is all we've got.
Get an impression.
Already have.
OK.
Let's go play Cinderella.
Could it be an Army boot? Could be.
Could be a work of modern art.
Sign it and see what you get.
.
.
Lance Corporal, show the gentlemen here your footwear.
What? They want to see if we're still polishing them properly.
.
.
Could see your face in them.
.
.
Not that you'd want to! Show him your soles.
Want me to tap-dance as well? Save the floor show till later, eh? Came across one of your ex-officers recently.
Oh, aye? Major Kassell.
Oh You know him? Yeah.
He'd the sense to get out and make a go of it in civvy street.
Doesn't take much sense when it's that or a court martial.
Course, they give him the choice.
Bloody officer! This was the Hong Kong business, was it? Never known a place like it.
Everyone was on the fiddle.
Your lot, my lot and the fat cats with titles.
But nothing was proved, was it? Officers only prove what they want to prove, don't they? That's why I got this far and no more.
I'm not joining that scum.
Inspector What? Come on, lads, let's get some work done round here.
It could be an Army boot, sir.
This is Yorkshire.
Everybody wears boots, including women, children and pit ponies.
It's not a fingerprint, lad, and right now that's what we need.
Dad? Dad! Are you all right? Why shouldn't I be? No, well Do you want another coffee? No, thank you.
DOOR CLOSES You've still got his photo.
Well, he was my godson, Arnie.
I was proud of him.
You should be too.
I'm still angry, Andy.
I can't help it.
Not with him, surely? No.
Oh, I don't know.
We're all allowed one stupid mistake.
But he wasn't, was he? That's the point.
Whatever you do, you can't bring him back.
I know that.
So D'you think they'll take to me? Who? Your rich friends.
Oh Yeah Hey, how come the likes of you get invited to one of Lord Snooty's weekends? Everybody wants a bookmaker for a friend, you should know that.
They're hoping for inside information.
So they'll take to you for the same reason.
Right Arnie, Andy.
Nice you could pop by.
Afraid you missed the shoot.
I only come for the party.
One of the best shots around.
A minute and I'll introduce the Euros, but first Sir William wants to meet you.
Do I have to curtsey? Sir William is self-made.
No airs and graces.
Shame.
I like etiquette.
Yes, I'd noticed Sir William.
This is Detective Superintendent Andy Dalziel.
Sir William.
Nice to see another man in proper shape.
I can't abide all these skeletons in Italian suits.
You do any shooting? No.
The Police Commission frowns on it.
Michael says you're a good man.
Few enough of those around.
Do you like birds? In bed or on the wing? Are you choosy? Can't afford to be.
We'll see what we can do.
.
.
We stock a variety of birds, don't we?.
.
Fix up a date with our friend.
Forgive me, I've got to make Euro chat.
God help me! Fancy a drink? Yeah, why not? HORNS SOUNDING Mary? Dad! Dad! Let me go, love! No, Mum! Get out of the way! Thank you! Mary? How did it go, Tom? They won.
Three-nil.
Three-bloody-nil.
First time all season and I missed it.
I meant with Customs.
Waste of time.
Clean as a whistle.
They hardly had a packet of aspirin on board, never mind heroin.
So Customs have closed the case? Course they have.
Just some malignant sod out to cause trouble.
And ruin my weekend.
Tell Andy to do his own dirty work next time.
What's he got to do with it? He's been working with Customs.
Doesn't he tell you anything? I thought you worked for him.
We've been rather preoccupied lately Aye, wasting my time! You made a hit with Sir William.
He made an impression on me as well.
Everything OK with the helicopter? Great.
It needed a thorough clean! What happens to these, then? Can't eat them all.
Market economy.
See the van? Vernon Briggs.
He buys them from us and sells them to you at some exorbitant price.
Didn't I eat one last night? Paradise Hall get them cheap.
Useful to keep your local dinery happy as I think you may appreciate.
So, some get cleaned off the top.
And the victors get a brace each.
Here you go.
I didn't shoot them.
Who's counting? She's done what? Phoned the paper.
Retracted her statement.
Said with the rain and everything, she could easily have been mistaken.
Our revered detective superintendent is spotless again Just like his shirts.
Yes, sir.
You don't look too pleased at having him back in the driving seat, so to speak.
I'm delighted, sir.
Of course you are.
As are we all.
Anything new on the Deeks' case? A glass slipper, sir.
what am I supposed to do with these buggers? Cook them? They won't fit under the grill.
Stuff them and make bookends.
I'd have to buy another book! Hector! Stand, boy! Stand! What are you doing here? It's me half-day, sir.
What are you doing? I'm a beater, sir.
Get away! Only part-time, like.
The odd weekend.
Do you have another job I'm not in trouble, am I, sir? I've done it since I was a kid, like.
Half the lads do.
They pay good money.
I suppose it could be seen as additional training.
Going in single file against armed men.
They shoot at the birds, sir, not at us.
Don't bet on it, sonny - not with me around! Everybody gets lost in supermarkets.
How would you know I'm not getting into one of those.
I'm not in the mood.
He was wandering round the car park.
He said he was looking for the car.
If he'd said he was looking for dinosaurs A Hillman Minx, a Hillman Minx.
He sold that car when I was six.
Where is he now? Mum's taken him up to bed.
What's she saying? If I could talk to her, my life would have been totally different.
Soon, you'll need to sit down with her and DOORBELL Happy birthday! Where's my little god-daughter, then? Her birthday was yesterday.
A mere technicality.
So, here we are, then.
Wet the baby's head.
Have you got any orange juice? We could make a buck's fizz.
That's tricky to say if you've had a drink.
Almost as difficult as "plucking pheasants".
Abracadabra! Fancy one of these? I'm a vegetarian.
Pluck them, then.
Make the girl a Pocah-thingy head-dress.
I'd have loved one these as a kid.
I'm going to lie down - headache.
Has she been using that line long? It was one of my wife's favourites.
It doesn't augur well, Peter.
I'll leave you these and you and the baby can have them on Sunday.
What do you want? I thought you'd never ask.
The usual.
I can't stand this bubbly.
It makes terrible noises in the night.
Where did you get those? You told me to have a holiday.
I've taken up country pursuits.
Doesn't sound like you.
I'm starting a new life.
I think your old one wants you back.
Oh? How's that, then? Your waitress has retracted her statement.
You don't seem surprised.
Why should I be? I was innocent, my lord.
You knew your new friends were being investigated by Customs? Is that another case you're working on? I thought the murder inquiry was keeping you busy.
You don't want to get involved in too many things.
It clouds the mind.
So, now brief me properly, sunshine.
And, er, no ice this time.
Come on! He may be a pain, but whatever else Andy is, he's as straight as a die.
People change.
Old age is staring him in the face and what's he got to meet it with? A cop's pension and an empty house.
And you reckon he wants to fill it with pheasants.
No, you're wrong.
I'm sure there's a logical explanation.
Give me one.
CLATTERING What's that? Probably Andy pissing on the herbaceous borders.
Peter! BABY CRIES I got him! Mary, I got him! I got him! Our baby's safe, our little Ellie's safe.
Call the police, Mary.
No need.
Dad, what have you done? .
.
Peter, are you all right? Who's that, Mary? It's Ellie, Dad.
I'm OK No Ellie? It can't be! Are you all right? Brilliant, bloody brilliant! Oh Do me ten copies of this missing items list.
Found this Any news? Charley Frostrick arrived home last night.
Have you circulated that list of missing items? On to it now, sir.
Find anything I missed briefing you on, sir? No But then I wouldn't, would I? What's that? Personal matter.
Hit you with the hardback version of The Female Eunuch? Lucky it was only your head.
Nowadays they seem to take shears to the more sensitive parts.
Like me to investigate? No, thank you, sir.
I wouldn't interfere in any case you didn't want me to.
Thought I'd pop in now and then to make sure you're OK.
Between social commitments? Exactly.
I knew you'd understand.
It's not half bad.
It's better than being on the dole and living at home.
Long as I don't have to shoot anyone.
Isn't that rather the point of being in the Army? Not for me.
Mind you, if I find out who did this to Grand-dad You'd tell us, wouldn't you? Happens.
Are you getting married? Point of being engaged, innit? Your father doesn't seem too happy about it.
From what I can gather, neither was your grand-dad.
It's my life.
You seen Karen yet? No.
I were late last night.
I'd have gone round, but you know what families are like.
Old-fashioned ideas.
Always been a problem.
Still, you managed to find places, eh? Well, you do, don't you? Right, shall we go? What do you want me to do? Have a look around.
Your mother was great, but you might spot something else.
Righto.
D'you mind if I go round on me own? I feel a bit funny Of course.
.
.
Karen! .
.
Sorry, sir.
No, I'm sorry.
But I am rather busy.
He wants me to take a quick butcher's round the house.
I could talk to Karen while we're waiting.
Gran's day at the hospital.
Got the house to myself for five minutes.
Bloody awful here on this thing.
Not even a proper sofa bed.
No doubt you'll soon have a nice billet in Baden-Baden.
Why did you retract your statement, Karen? About what? Oh, you mean the paper? Well, I were wrong.
Initially, I understand you were absolutely positive.
Well, I changed my mind - woman's prerogative.
BANGING Any chance of a cup of tea? I was just checking it were still there.
Nobody said owt, so I just wondered.
Who was there to say? Who else knew? Only me.
I never told nobody.
Did your grandfather show you? No I spied on him when I come for the money for the ring I shouldn't have done that, should I? You should've told me about this.
I wasn't going to nick it.
I mean, it's me mam's now, isn't it? I wouldn't nick from me mam.
You think I did it, don't you? I couldn't have killed Grand-dad.
Never! Not in a million years.
No, Charley, I don't believe you would.
Come on.
Someone's waiting for you next door.
I've just double-checked, Michael.
The Customs boys have given up so you're all right for tomorrow.
And so am I.
Yeah.
I'm really looking forward to it.
I'll see you there.
Thought you'd gone, sir.
Sorry to disappoint you.
Do I disappoint you, Peter? Excuse me, sir.
The medals have turned up at Edwin Sutton Antiques, Leystone.
That old rogue! What's he up to? Probably thinks it'll get us off his back.
You know him, sir? Oh, yeah.
One of the great fences of our time.
Olympic class.
Not that we've ever been able to nail him with anything.
Another of our respectable citizens.
Did Sutton serve the man himself? Yes, sir.
Bring him in.
Let's see if we can get an ID.
Sir.
Thanks for the background info, sir.
That's what I'm here for to bring enlightenment to the downcast.
Talking of respectable citizens, what's the SP on Mr Bancroft? Thought you'd never ask, Peter.
Or were you just being coy? Arnie and I go way back.
Used to play rugby together.
Then I turned to a life of crime and he turned to other turf.
He had a son.
Proverbial apple of his eye.
Bright lad.
Not unlike you, actually.
A bit pushy.
Got in with the wrong bunch.
Died.
How? Car accident.
They do happen, Peter.
Is that all? What more do you want? Go on, son.
Go earn your medals.
I've got phone calls to make.
Arnie? He were only in two minutes.
But you think you might remember him? I might, but I doubt it.
Male, white, tall, uncertain age.
Not much of a description, is it, Mr Sutton? Show me a piece of Dresden porcelain for 10 seconds, I'll tell you it all, right down to the buckles on the shoes - because that's my trade! Could he have been a soldier? Well, he wasn't carrying a rifle, but, yeah, he could have been anything.
Sir? Yeah? Charley Frostrick's arrived, sir.
Look, can I go now? Inspector.
Are these your grandfather's medals? Oh, aye Definite.
So you got him, then? Not yet.
These were sold to a local antique shop.
How much did he get? Thirty pounds.
Thirty quid? He killed my grand-dad for ã30? Look at these! I mean, he fought in Tobruk El Alamein You know, he used to say, "I fought for lads like you.
" He used to drive me bonkers.
But he did, didn't he? And what did they give him, eh? Thirty quid.
Has Karen come with you? No.
No, she gave me the bum's rush.
My picture of army life didn't take her fancy.
She's gone off for another job up at the Grange.
The Grange? How did SHE get a job up there? Did she return the ring? You're better off without her, Charley.
Yeah, everybody says that.
But I love her.
Well, you wanted her.
I understand it.
Most men might be tempted to spend the night with her at Paradise Hall.
Never went there.
She wouldn't have it.
The best I got was Grand-dad's shed.
What? Can I can I take these? Not at the moment.
Charley.
You'll get everything you deserve, Charley.
Eventually.
Just hold on.
PHONE RINGS Yeah? Yes, Inspector? If I can, of course.
Yes, but I didn't stay around long enough to see his face.
That he was a soldier is all I can be sure of.
He may not have been ready for inspection but he was in uniform.
When? Night before your boss came in for dinner.
No, not at all.
Glad to be of help.
Tell Sutton he's going on an outing.
What's going on? We're taking our witness to see some soldiers.
There are over 600 men there.
Then get Trott to organise a parade.
Shall I come? No need, sir.
I've coped all right this far.
That's a matter of opinion.
This could be dangerous.
The Army All we're going to do is see if anyone jogs your memory.
It's safe.
You can't force me.
I'm a law-abiding citizen.
Of course, sir.
You're free not to co-operate.
If you like, we can go back and get the warrant.
What warrant? I'm not getting out the car.
Just tell us if you see the man.
Back again? Thinking of joining up? It had crossed my mind.
We're here to see Captain Trott.
Right, sir.
I'll phone through.
How many are there? Get him! Hey! You'll pay for that door! I've just got this car back! .
.
Still coping all right without me, are you? So I sold some medals for a mate - so what, Inspector? What was the name of your little friend? Can't tell you, sir.
No names, no pack drill.
Got a code of honour in the Army.
It's called loyalty.
Does it extend to old soldiers who get bashed to death in their bath? Don't know owt about that.
.
.
Lock him up for the night.
You run a nicer place here than we do, sir.
What time's breakfast? Interview terminated at 17.
08.
At least we got him for firing at an officer.
I want him for murder! Let's try Lolita.
That cow told you what? All I want is the name of the soldier.
I was faithful to Charley.
I'd never have done owt like that.
She's making it up.
Why would Mrs Abbiss do that? Cos she's old and jealous.
She saw something, Karen.
Dirty dreams.
Nowt to do with me.
Did you mention to the soldier that your neighbour maybe had some money salted away? There was no soldier.
You're not listening to me! Can I go now? I'm starting my new job tonight and I daren't be late.
Go on.
How much do you think she was involved? How much can we prove? .
.
Well? Fingerprints don't match Gillott's.
He's too smart for that.
He'd have been wearing his little white gloves - smart.
He's the sort likes to impress girls in his uniform.
What next, sir? Get his boots off him.
Strange - don't seem to be any Customs with us today.
Probably sleeping in.
They've been working hard lately.
Haven't they just? Great day for a shoot.
Aye.
Perfect.
Sir! 12.
02.
Detective Inspector Pascoe has entered the room.
.
.
At ease, Corporal.
At ease.
Breakfast to your liking? Bacon wasn't crisp enough, sir.
Well, we must make a note of that.
And I'd appreciate your comment on these, Corporal.
For the tape - a pair of Army boots.
Wouldn't pass muster, sir.
And why's that? Need their morning spit and polish.
They look clean enough to me on the surface.
But that's all it is with you, Lance Corporal - surface bull.
Our lads may not be very hot on spit and polish, but we're very sharp on deep-down dirt.
You left your mark on the bathroom mat and the bathroom mat left its mark on you.
Tiny Microscopic.
But enough to put you in the frame.
Sit down, son.
You're not in the Army now.
Excellent! Charley told me about her.
Bragging away when I put him in jankers.
Then she came to wave him off on manoeuvres.
And all smudged mascara, but eyes on the look-out for a better mark.
Piece of piss, as long as you had money to jangle.
We went on a 24-hour bender - and I mean bender - all over the shop, booze and bonk all the way.
Then she starts flashing this bleeding ring.
Said she knows where there's a fortune stashed away.
She'd seen her boyfriend "get a wad from this old fart".
She knew he kept a spare key in his shed and we waited there.
Passed the time quite nicely Till we see the bathroom light come on.
We let ourselves in, we started going round the house.
In the bedroom, he must've heard us.
He starts calling, "Charley? Charley?" So I went in and gave him Charley But he were too daft to tell us owt.
Some blokes got no brains.
Then you went downstairs.
Tried to make it look like a burglary.
Then she strolls off to work.
Cool as a cucumber.
It were all her.
She set me up.
She got me drunk.
I could've been anybody.
She's the one that really did the murder.
Loyalty, eh Not to a woman! They never give you any, do they? PARTY HUBBUB Having a nice time? See you later.
Another, please, darling.
My pleasure.
Need to get your hands round something hot after a long day.
I bet! Haven't we met before? You were using that line 30 years ago.
It never worked then.
You might be lucky this time.
.
.
Excuse me I need to pay the beaters.
I suppose we could always do them for running a knocking-shop.
What - and spoil the party? Oh, no, I wouldn't want to do that.
Oi! You've got style, Andy, nothing but style.
Ta.
We're lost.
Oh, no, sir.
No, no Not exactly.
There's a lane somewhere here One there.
Will that do? Perfect.
Let's live in hope.
How long is this lane? About three miles, sir.
Come on.
Let's get there in style.
SIREN WAILS Responsible citizen.
Glad there are some left.
What the? Phone! Hand me the bleeding phone! I thought you'd be more interested in indoor attractions.
Nothing like watching others slave in the cold while you're warm.
PHONE RINGS Think it might be you.
Excuse me.
No rest for the wicked! Dalziel.
Shit! Go for it.
Not much point doing much else.
Not bad news, I hope? You better come with me.
SIREN WAILS I hope this isn't going to be embarrassing.
So do I What's happening, Michael? Nothing.
They've come to arrest one of the maids.
Seems a bit mob-handed.
She's in the hall.
Thank you, sir.
.
.
Go on.
You! Here! - You read her her rights? - Just cuff her, Sarge! Please! Sorry, sir, didn't mean to spoil your party.
You have! You know that little van you frightened in the lane? Yes.
That was to be our link to the whole drug chain.
We need the big boys who get it on to the street.
That van was going to lead us all the way down the line until you and the cavalry rode in! Here we go! Come on! You'd better start praying! What the hell are you playing at? We believe one of your helicopters is being used to smuggle heroin.
Do you know what you're saying? Do YOU, sir? My bet is you know everything but you're too canny to put your fingerprints on it.
You let others do that.
A word to the troops while you stand back and whistle.
You'll be clean More's the pity! But it's different for the major, innit? .
.
Constable, come here.
Watch him.
.
.
You too, Arnie.
Lots of guns around.
My pleasure.
Did you know Arnie's son died in a car accident? Yeah.
The autopsy found he'd had a heroin overdose Did you know that? Course he did.
.
.
You were his boss, weren't you? Said you'd look after him.
That's what I believed.
Till I said what Customs were on to.
A whole new picture.
Arnie's son died of heroin.
What's that got to do with me? .
.
Come on.
.
.
Get Rin Tin Tin in the stables.
Check the pheasant packing.
You have no right to do this! Don't be stupid! I'm going to make a phone call.
Guess who to.
Your friend - the chief constable.
Everyone against the wall! Move those men in.
Right back against the wall! You check in there.
Come on! Get your backs into it! Get those bloody boxes open! Must be around here somewhere.
Don't play with it, lad! Get it open! It was going like a dream.
Arnie got me in with the boys.
They like a bent policeman in the house.
Just had to prove it to them.
Then the accident.
Looked like the cloud that had the silver lining.
Not for the old guy Were you driving the car? I got to the end of the drive.
Arnie threatened to hit me with me spare bottle.
Not the man to risk that, so we changed over.
That's the truth.
Why didn't you tell me? Would you have believed me? Why should you? Truth is I would have driven without old Arnie.
Anyway, you not believing helped.
Getting the major to perjure himself and sort out the waitress It couldn't have been more perfect if we'd planned it.
Kassell thinks he has a copper in his pocket.
It would've been ungrateful not to return the favour.
So, "Clear flight, Major, guaranteed.
" "Thanks.
Join the party.
" Only problem now is I think we might be at a wake.
Get off me! This is great Hello, Karen.
Why all the fuss? He was practically dead anyway! She gets around, doesn't she? You can say that again.
You coming back, sir? No, I'm staying here.
Go! No need for you to get shit on your shoes.
I'm staying.
I spoke to your superior.
Oh, aye? And what did the Almighty say? You better be right in your assumptions.
Nothing! It's clean.
Right Wrap it up.
It's clean.
You can all go home.
Does this mean I can return to my normal duties? Let's go.
You're not letting him away with it? Arnie, please, get in the car.
I hope you won't get your equivalent of a court martial.
You bastard! Don't be a bad loser, Arnie.
You know you really shouldn't bet unless you're sure you're going to win.
The car.
Hector! Stay, boy! Stay! Just knocking off, sir.
Got paid? Yes, sir.
My, lad! Haven't you put on weight? Must be one of the perks of the job.
Yes, sir.
Open up.
Oh, laddie, laddie! Nobody wanted these, sir.
What? What do you think this is? Dunno.
Giblets, sir? Giblets? Yes, sir.
They always come in a little plastic bag.
You know, son, you've got the brains to make chief constable.
Thank you, sir.
Walkies, Hector! Heel! No, Arnie! NO! I'll drive.
Very well.
See you.
Look after your daughter, Peter.
It won't be long before you lose her.
What did he say? Just goodbye.
I did everything wrong.
I'd have done the same.
No You would never have involved a mate, like Arnie.
Textbook stuff, that.
My mistake.
It's not even me who has to pay.
Do you think that's going to help? Go away.
Are you deaf? So? We do have work to do sir.
BBC Scotland 1997