Invader ZIM (2001) s02e04 Episode Script
ZIM Eats Waffles
1
[GIR humming]
[squeaking]
Doo doo-doo-doo ♪
Doo doo doo ♪
Doo-doo doo-doo-doo ♪
[sucking]
Boo-ee oop-doo doo doo doo ♪
Doo-dee doo doo-doo ♪
Dee dee dada dee dee ♪
Doo-doo doo doo doo-doo ♪
[screams]
Dib: Aah!
[Dib groans]
I, um--
GIR: Intruder.
[beeping]
[humming]
Hey, would you mind putting
this spy camera inside Zim's house
so I can spy on
his evil and stuff?
Okey-dokey.
I should have tried
this a long time ago.
Ah!
Ah!
Aah!
At last, I've got a
real video camera
inside Zim's house.
This time I'm prepared.
Camera Dib one: check.
Record drives Alpha,
Beta, Gamma, Stevie:
Check.
[electronic trill]
What?
I can't record any of this
with the drives broken.
Computer, run the disk repair.
Tell me as soon as the
drives are functional again.
[tink tink tink]
And now, Zim,
to discover your next evil plan.
[tink tink tink]
[beeping]
[GIR squeaking]
Hey, look, they're
gonna start making
artificial beavers.
[gasps]
He's after our
beaver technology.
Is this his next evil plan?
Well
time to work on
my next evil plan.
Talk about perfect timing.
[beeping]
But no drives yet.
The swollen eyeballs
got to see this.
Agent Darkbootie here.
I have a video feed
from the alien's house.
[gurgling]
[gurgling continues]
Darkbootie: Hmm, Agent Mothman,
once I tied Bigfoot's
toe hairs together.
It was very funny until his
insane fit of howling rage
ended in tragedy for
a family of campers.
My point is, jokes
do not have a place
in the Swollen Eyeball Network.
Call back when you're serious.
But--
[groans]
Yes, time to work
on my evil plan
Ooh.
To cripple the
humans by destroying--
GIR: Guess who made waffles?
I'm not going to eat that.
Aah! Aah! Aah!
A-A-Aah!
Enough!
I will try some, already.
Well, they don't seem
to be making me sick.
You know, this actually
might be a good way
to build a tolerance to
the human's filthy food.
OK, GIR, I will try--
Hee hee hee hee hee!
And as soon as I'm
done with these waffles,
I will discuss my evil plan.
Yes!
This is it.
For this plan I will create a--
Hey, these aren't bad.
What's in 'em?
There's waffle in 'em.
You're lying!
Anyhow, GIR, I need a break
from the talking of my new plan.
Let's have some
silence for a bit, huh?
[Zim chewing]
GIR: I like to make waffles.
[chewing continues]
[burp]
[gags]
Come on!
The plan, already!
Hey, you know who came by today?
Who?
That ugly neighbor lady.
She was wearing
this horrible-- Huh?
[Zim screams]
Oh, mighty dog!
The giant flesh-eating
demon squid has escaped!
[Zim gasping]
Aah!
Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!
Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!
Oh, man!
Zim: Security,
protect your master!
Aah!
GIR, defensive mode.
Whee!
Ha ha ha hee!
Mmm!
Zim: Eee! Ooh!
Aah!
Unh!
Ooh!
The Eyeballs gotta see this!
Agent Nessie, here.
Check this out.
It's amazing.
A dog eating waffles.
Ha, stinking ha!
Darkbootie told me
about you, Mothman.
What happened?
Ah, he escaped.
Oh, well.
He wasn't part of
my new plan, anyhow.
I'll need a test subject.
Bring me Nick!
These got peanuts
and soap in 'em.
He's got a human test subject.
[brain probe sizzles]
Ah, yes, um Nick,
neural experiment number 231.
And how is the happiness probe
in your brain doing today,
filthy human?
It's great!
I never want to leave
this magical place.
I'm so happy.
Yah-ha!
[brain probe sizzles]
Excellent.
Want some waffles?
Zim's making him eat waffles!
That poor kid.
I gotta help.
Please, I need somebody
from the Eyeball
Net to believe me.
Agent Disembodied Head.
A need a mobile
eyeball unit to--
Agent Mothman, stop calling us!
Then I'll try the F.B.I.
Hello, thank you
for calling the F.B.I.
My name is Greg.
How may I help you?
I have an emergency.
There's a kid who's--
Ha ha ha!
Hey, hey, you're Dib, right?
Did you ever get
that ninja ghost
out of your toilet?
Yes, no thanks to you.
There's a kid in trouble.
[chokes]
[brain probe sizzles]
It's good.
Man, that kid sure
loves his waffles.
Stay right there.
We're sending someone
over to beat you up
for playing jokes on the F.B.I.
But look at the brain probe!
Oh, all right.
We'll send someone
to investigate
when we get around to it.
[both gagging]
GIR: You look like
you need waffles!
Mmm mmm mmm!
Yay.
Gotta stall him for time.
Bloaty's Pizza Hog.
We deliver, I guess.
I need you to deliver to
this address right now.
We guarantee we'll
see what we can do.
[brain probe sizzles]
Maybe I bought some time.
The suspense is unbearable.
Hurry up, F.B.I.!
[brain probe sizzles]
And now, GIR, to test
my evil plan on this child.
Dib: No!
No more waffles, GIR.
Wah hah hah!
No, really.
I'm staring to feel sick.
Aah!
A-A-Aah!
All right, I'll eat
just one more piece.
[gagging]
Aah!
The hideous mutant
squid has escaped again
and has created an army
of cyborg zombie soldiers
to do its evil bidding!
No, stay back!
Stay back!
No-o-o!
[beep]
[whimpering]
Ow!
Agent Darkbootie, answer.
Agent Darkbootie!
Bootie!
Oh, it's horrible!
A horrible army of cyborgs
rending Zim's very flesh.
Oh, the carnage
makes me so happy.
[doorbell rings]
Man: Hello, Bloaty's Pizza.
Heh heh.
Hoo-whee!
Now the cyborgs are eating pizza
and the F.B.I. is being cocooned
to feed the squid babies
that just flew in
from the window.
Ha! Whoo!
What's that thing Zim's got?
Zim: Don't make me use this.
I'll do it.
[explosion]
GIR: Doo doo doo ♪
What is it, Mothman?
Oh, you make me sick.
No, wait!
There was a mutant
and cyborgs and--
[beeping]
Yes, the record
drives are fixed.
I can show it to
the Eyeballs later.
Your waffle-eating
days are over Zim.
Well, thankfully I
was able to reprogram
those cyborgs at the last minute
and send them off to do
horrible things to the humans.
But my evil plan
Hey, I forgot what
my evil plan was.
Oh, well.
GIR, your waffles
have sickened me.
Fetch me the bucket.
[GIR squeals]
No! The plan!
What was the plan?
[Zim throwing up]
Oh, well,
at least I have something
recorded on disk.
It wasn't a total loss.
No-o-o!
Whatever.
[GIR humming]
[squeaking]
Doo doo-doo-doo ♪
Doo doo doo ♪
Doo-doo doo-doo-doo ♪
[sucking]
Boo-ee oop-doo doo doo doo ♪
Doo-dee doo doo-doo ♪
Dee dee dada dee dee ♪
Doo-doo doo doo doo-doo ♪
[screams]
Dib: Aah!
[Dib groans]
I, um--
GIR: Intruder.
[beeping]
[humming]
Hey, would you mind putting
this spy camera inside Zim's house
so I can spy on
his evil and stuff?
Okey-dokey.
I should have tried
this a long time ago.
Ah!
Ah!
Aah!
At last, I've got a
real video camera
inside Zim's house.
This time I'm prepared.
Camera Dib one: check.
Record drives Alpha,
Beta, Gamma, Stevie:
Check.
[electronic trill]
What?
I can't record any of this
with the drives broken.
Computer, run the disk repair.
Tell me as soon as the
drives are functional again.
[tink tink tink]
And now, Zim,
to discover your next evil plan.
[tink tink tink]
[beeping]
[GIR squeaking]
Hey, look, they're
gonna start making
artificial beavers.
[gasps]
He's after our
beaver technology.
Is this his next evil plan?
Well
time to work on
my next evil plan.
Talk about perfect timing.
[beeping]
But no drives yet.
The swollen eyeballs
got to see this.
Agent Darkbootie here.
I have a video feed
from the alien's house.
[gurgling]
[gurgling continues]
Darkbootie: Hmm, Agent Mothman,
once I tied Bigfoot's
toe hairs together.
It was very funny until his
insane fit of howling rage
ended in tragedy for
a family of campers.
My point is, jokes
do not have a place
in the Swollen Eyeball Network.
Call back when you're serious.
But--
[groans]
Yes, time to work
on my evil plan
Ooh.
To cripple the
humans by destroying--
GIR: Guess who made waffles?
I'm not going to eat that.
Aah! Aah! Aah!
A-A-Aah!
Enough!
I will try some, already.
Well, they don't seem
to be making me sick.
You know, this actually
might be a good way
to build a tolerance to
the human's filthy food.
OK, GIR, I will try--
Hee hee hee hee hee!
And as soon as I'm
done with these waffles,
I will discuss my evil plan.
Yes!
This is it.
For this plan I will create a--
Hey, these aren't bad.
What's in 'em?
There's waffle in 'em.
You're lying!
Anyhow, GIR, I need a break
from the talking of my new plan.
Let's have some
silence for a bit, huh?
[Zim chewing]
GIR: I like to make waffles.
[chewing continues]
[burp]
[gags]
Come on!
The plan, already!
Hey, you know who came by today?
Who?
That ugly neighbor lady.
She was wearing
this horrible-- Huh?
[Zim screams]
Oh, mighty dog!
The giant flesh-eating
demon squid has escaped!
[Zim gasping]
Aah!
Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!
Uhh! Uhh! Uhh!
Oh, man!
Zim: Security,
protect your master!
Aah!
GIR, defensive mode.
Whee!
Ha ha ha hee!
Mmm!
Zim: Eee! Ooh!
Aah!
Unh!
Ooh!
The Eyeballs gotta see this!
Agent Nessie, here.
Check this out.
It's amazing.
A dog eating waffles.
Ha, stinking ha!
Darkbootie told me
about you, Mothman.
What happened?
Ah, he escaped.
Oh, well.
He wasn't part of
my new plan, anyhow.
I'll need a test subject.
Bring me Nick!
These got peanuts
and soap in 'em.
He's got a human test subject.
[brain probe sizzles]
Ah, yes, um Nick,
neural experiment number 231.
And how is the happiness probe
in your brain doing today,
filthy human?
It's great!
I never want to leave
this magical place.
I'm so happy.
Yah-ha!
[brain probe sizzles]
Excellent.
Want some waffles?
Zim's making him eat waffles!
That poor kid.
I gotta help.
Please, I need somebody
from the Eyeball
Net to believe me.
Agent Disembodied Head.
A need a mobile
eyeball unit to--
Agent Mothman, stop calling us!
Then I'll try the F.B.I.
Hello, thank you
for calling the F.B.I.
My name is Greg.
How may I help you?
I have an emergency.
There's a kid who's--
Ha ha ha!
Hey, hey, you're Dib, right?
Did you ever get
that ninja ghost
out of your toilet?
Yes, no thanks to you.
There's a kid in trouble.
[chokes]
[brain probe sizzles]
It's good.
Man, that kid sure
loves his waffles.
Stay right there.
We're sending someone
over to beat you up
for playing jokes on the F.B.I.
But look at the brain probe!
Oh, all right.
We'll send someone
to investigate
when we get around to it.
[both gagging]
GIR: You look like
you need waffles!
Mmm mmm mmm!
Yay.
Gotta stall him for time.
Bloaty's Pizza Hog.
We deliver, I guess.
I need you to deliver to
this address right now.
We guarantee we'll
see what we can do.
[brain probe sizzles]
Maybe I bought some time.
The suspense is unbearable.
Hurry up, F.B.I.!
[brain probe sizzles]
And now, GIR, to test
my evil plan on this child.
Dib: No!
No more waffles, GIR.
Wah hah hah!
No, really.
I'm staring to feel sick.
Aah!
A-A-Aah!
All right, I'll eat
just one more piece.
[gagging]
Aah!
The hideous mutant
squid has escaped again
and has created an army
of cyborg zombie soldiers
to do its evil bidding!
No, stay back!
Stay back!
No-o-o!
[beep]
[whimpering]
Ow!
Agent Darkbootie, answer.
Agent Darkbootie!
Bootie!
Oh, it's horrible!
A horrible army of cyborgs
rending Zim's very flesh.
Oh, the carnage
makes me so happy.
[doorbell rings]
Man: Hello, Bloaty's Pizza.
Heh heh.
Hoo-whee!
Now the cyborgs are eating pizza
and the F.B.I. is being cocooned
to feed the squid babies
that just flew in
from the window.
Ha! Whoo!
What's that thing Zim's got?
Zim: Don't make me use this.
I'll do it.
[explosion]
GIR: Doo doo doo ♪
What is it, Mothman?
Oh, you make me sick.
No, wait!
There was a mutant
and cyborgs and--
[beeping]
Yes, the record
drives are fixed.
I can show it to
the Eyeballs later.
Your waffle-eating
days are over Zim.
Well, thankfully I
was able to reprogram
those cyborgs at the last minute
and send them off to do
horrible things to the humans.
But my evil plan
Hey, I forgot what
my evil plan was.
Oh, well.
GIR, your waffles
have sickened me.
Fetch me the bucket.
[GIR squeals]
No! The plan!
What was the plan?
[Zim throwing up]
Oh, well,
at least I have something
recorded on disk.
It wasn't a total loss.
No-o-o!
Whatever.