Puberty Blues (2012) s02e04 Episode Script

He said 'mourning'.
That he was mourning you.
I don't want him to talk to any other girls but you.
I'll guard it with my life.
I know you feel a bit threatened and confused with your mum taking a lover but we both have to get with it, be friends.
Who the fuck's Graham? Loyalty! Who's Nancy? She's my room-mate.
She's funny.
And then he started inviting me to lunch and then one day.
I think you've got the wrong idea about me.
And then he threatened to sack me.
Do you wanna try it? You've gotta promise you're not gonna tell anyone.
What's an abortion? What? Oh, they're those poodle dogs! Would you help me? I'm so glad she's back.
I hate that Debbie's gone.
I hate that every other girl in this suburb is an untrustworthy bitch.
It's minty and it's milky.
It's minty milk.
I can't tell if it tastes good or if it tastes like I just brushed my teeth with spoof in my mouth.
Ugh.
You're trying to ruin this for me, but I don't care.
I think I like it.
Uh! Get lost.
Show me.
Nothing to show.
There is only one reason you would wear a top that ugly all day - because you let some tard suck on your neck.
I'm cold.
Alright.
It was Daryl Braithwaite.
He's in love with me.
Tell me who it was or I'll tell everybody that I saw Freida licking you out between the milk crates and the trucks at Miranda Fair car park.
Ugh! Off! And very elaborate, which is distracting.
- I'm going.
- Where? - Homework.
- Very funny.
The fourth coalition was assembled in 1806.
Napoleon defeated Prussia in the Battle of .
.
Jena-Auerstedt in October.
I think I've got chilblains.
From sitting on the heater? Do you know what they look like? Hmm? Let me see.
There's nothing there.
Wanna know a secret? Always! Catherine Graham had sex with a Newington boy after debating.
- After debating? - Sex! Now everyone knows about it.
She's really blotted her copybook.
Poor girl.
There must be other girls who've done it here, but they wouldn't dare to admit it.
But I think you can see it in their faces.
How? They've got nympho eyes.
Has Gary ever tried it on you? I can't imagine what I'd say if a boy asked me to do it with him.
Yeah, I know.
Gary's not really like that.
To ask.
What's it gonna be like when a boy sees us with all our clothes off? I can't even think about it.
Check it out, man.
Wanna get out there.
Whose car is this? Foreman's.
Wanna take it for a spin? Yeah! Oh, these are empty.
Well, then what the fuck are you doing sticking them in your arm? Let's go, Boardy! How come your foreman let you take his car? He didn't.
I knocked it off.
Shit, Boardy.
Fuck.
He gave me the sack.
Prick.
What'd you come and get me for? Straccy knows a bloke who can take it off my hands for good money, but I need you to come - I'm not good at this stuff.
Talking.
So take Straccy.
Straccy owes him money.
Fuck.
Bloody hell.
Oi, Bruce! Fuck.
Shit, man, sorry.
- I just - Mate? Move it! Are you kidding me? Stuff this.
Why do I even need maths? When I look at this page, all I can hear is noise in my head.
Just goes "Meep!" Well, you don't need it if you're gonna be someone's wife all your life.
Then all you'd be counting is how many different ways there are to prepare minced meat.
From bolognaise to shepherd's pie.
I'd rather die.
Don't just be beautiful, Cheryl.
It's not enough.
Square root 225is .
.
15? - Certainly is.
- Yes! He's been in and out of that bathroom all afternoon.
David? It's not stinging when you wee, is it? No.
Then on the floor, put your palms firmly on the floor.
And then very slowly, stretch your legs as wide as you can, weight under thighs and your hip joints.
And drop the head down to the floor.
As you breathe in, slowly slide your hand along the leg and then slowly come up.
But next time, we'll try to put our head to the floor.
Oi! Fuck off! Ferris! Ferris, you scared me half to death.
There's a bloody kid at the window.
- Which one? - I don't know.
One of Gary's shit little mates.
I love having them around.
Keeps it colourful.
Gary, get up here.
Ferris, when you yell like that, it gives me the willies.
I'm gonna have a shower.
Don't take that off.
This? That.
Yeah, it was like God was watching.
I got the best set in the first heat.
I paddled straight out and drilled the first wave and then I got another one straight up and kind of almost lost my, um - Composure? - Yeah, composure.
But I didn't.
I didn't.
I just ripped it up.
And then second heat, first wave, I got this big peaking left-hander.
And I'm not that great on my backhand I just came off the top lip and it all kind of worked.
And everyone else got slops.
Ask him if there were other girls there.
Were there many other people watching - like, other girls? Yeah, a few.
Then, third heat.
That was when all my luck ran out.
This shark fucker from Maroubra Can I listen? And I got dumped, chundered.
Thought I was a goner.
You remember when I wiped out on that really big day at Green Hills? I remember.
Who was that? No-one.
Is someone there? No, just another girl walked past.
Yeah, right.
And said, "I remember.
" Yeah.
Anyway, I, um I got knocked out in the quarter-finals.
- I gotta go.
- Already? Yeah.
See ya.
- "I remember"? - Sorry! I was shitting myself, but jumps in, starts her up, gives me 100 bucks and pisses off.
You want a hit? It's my shout.
I don't want it, OK? Get it through your thick skull.
And also, you've already had a hit today.
You don't need another one.
Sporty won't give me any more.
I owe him too much on the tick.
- Fuck.
- Please, Gary.
Every part of me is busting for it.
Holy shit.
Is that your olds? Mate, they're going at it like rabbits.
There's the smile that I fell in love with.
I'm just happy to have my husband home.
No, it's not that.
It really is.
No, it's not.
You're different.
I am? Mmm.
I think it's good you're seeing Graham.
I think he brings out the best in you.
Kiss me.
Come on.
Kiss me like you kiss him.
And a big sigh.
And a big sigh.
Been waiting all day to take you in my arms and squeeze.
Before we do anything too squeezy .
.
I have something I need to say.
I love what we have, Gray-Gray.
But I made a promise to to Ferris and he's home now.
Did you come over to extinguish our love? My beauty.
I see so many couples a week struggling.
And do you know what their problem is? You you probably shouldn't tell me.
Their marriages have expired.
What we have is pure love, Yvonne.
What you've got with Ferris is a piece of paper, and it's yellowing.
But we also have a son.
When I met you, you were withered.
I was withered? Yes.
And I watered you.
Ferris doesn't love you like I do.
He won't water you.
He'll let weeds grow all around you.
He'll let your leaves turn brown.
He'll let the bugs eat you.
He is he is terrible with plants.
You're the prettiest flower in the garden, Yvonne.
I won't let you go.
Oh! Good afternoon.
All Saints Ladies College.
Hello.
Can I speak to Deborah Vickers, please? - She's not here.
- Don't hang up.
I need you to write something down.
- Can you do that? - OK.
Write "Your mother rang.
" "Your mother rang.
" "And this is not the first time.
" "Not the first time.
" "Nor the second, nor the third.
" Write that.
Got it.
Now, can you go and put that on Debbie's pillow? I will.
'Bye.
Oh, darling, listen to this.
"This month, anything is possible for Sagittarians.
"The land of plenty is right round the corner.
"Trick is to know how to get there.
" Are you sure it says 'plenty'? Feels like we've taken a wrong turn, ended up in the land of empty.
I don't know how they do all this star sign stuff, but they always get it exactly spot-on, I reckon.
I hope you're right.
There's nothing in here for me.
I give up.
- Morning.
- Hey, eat.
You can't go to school on an empty stomach, darling.
- I'll get a pie at recess.
- Let me throw you a banana.
Mum, don't throw fruit at me.
I'll throw you a banana.
Oh.
Well, come and get it.
Alright, alright.
Take a seat, please.
There's a lot to love about electrochemistry.
Randy Candy! If you're willing to give it a chance.
Willing and more than able.
So open up your books.
Turn to page 93.
Books, Vicki, not legs.
I'm gonna shut your mouth with my foot in a minute.
- Randy Candy! - Whoever that is - Are you quite finished? - Are you finished, sir? I've had just about enough, yeah.
Vicki, he said he's had enough.
Wipe your mouth.
Sir, she just slapped me! You're meant to be friends.
You could be friendlier.
- Not as friendly as you, though.
- Randy Candy! Cheryl, please.
I'm standing up here, just trying to do my job.
Just turn to page 93 now.
- Randy Candy! - Randy Candy! Forget about it.
Forget it! - I'm going.
- Yeah, I'm coming.
Wanna walk to physie? We could get a milkshake on the way.
Can't.
Judy's driving me.
Who's Judy? Mrs Vickers.
Why? Because I live with them now.
In Debbie's room.
You're lying.
Yeah? I found your Best Friends Rule Book.
"Best friends share Clinkers.
" We wrote that when we were nine.
Shit.
Hello? Sue? What's wrong? I'm so puffed.
I ran all the way from school to the milk bar.
Didn't stop! What, did you run out of Wizz Fizz? Cheryl's living in your room.
Cheryl is in my living room? Much worse! I can't breathe.
Cheryl is living in your room.
Please tell me immediately that what you just said is certifiably untrue.
I wish I could but I can't.
Who told you? Cheryl did just then.
Grinning her ugly molly mug off.
What about me? It's my room! Why didn't they ask me? She's going through our stuff.
She found our rule book.
My ears have just gone loud.
Do you want me to sneak in there, rescue the stuff we don't want her to see? There are bits and pieces everywhere.
Who knows what else she's gonna find? It's too hard! Oh, my God.
Spaz face photo collection! No! Oh, no! I'm actually going to kill my mother.
I'm never gonna speak to her ever, ever, ever again.
No, no, you have to speak to her.
- Why? - To tell her to get Cheryl out.
Oh, Cheryl? Darling, you haven't seen Sue, have you? Last I saw of her, she was running out of school before the bell.
Before the bell? Oh, I didn't think we'd be seeing you at physie for a while, Jude.
Oh, yeah.
Martin and I have taken Cheryl in.
She's a good enough kid.
She's just missing out on some of the basics, like adequate mothering.
Well, I take my hat off to you, Jude.
Good on you.
And good luck with that one, by the way.
Oh, I've got nothing against Lynette.
It's just kids need more than good haircuts.
No, I agree.
Sue knows our rules.
Thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not wake us before 11am on a Sunday morning, that sort of thing.
What would you do if Sue came home and told you she'd bombed the Hilton? Judy! You're a good and loving mother, Pam, but I just want to know where the line is.
I wanna know how Sue would be punished if she bombed the Hilton.
If at all.
Well, we'd be extremely cross, of course.
You know, but I would be happy that she told me.
Then I suppose we'd have to take her to the police station, which, yes, would be a toughie.
A toughie? Oh, here she is.
- You alright, poss? - Fine.
Are you gonna tell your mother where you've been? Are you gonna tell your daughter who's been sleeping in her bed? Mrs Vickers is a traitor.
Well, sometimes people like Cheryl need a bit of a leg-up.
- A leg-up? - Mmm.
Cheryl doesn't have legs 'cause she's a snake.
She's probably half-swallowed all of Debbie's things by now.
I bet she starts wearing Debbie's clothes.
Or going round with Gary! Darling, I thought you liked Cheryl.
I like her about as much as you like someone who isn't very nice to you.
Why can't Debbie's boarding school just burn down? Why? So, you gonna tell me where you were this afternoon? Oh, I was ringing Debbie.
My physie shoes are falling apart.
Oh, God.
Well, don't tell your father.
It's not a good time.
Have you got any coins for the phone? No.
- Have you got any coins? - Sorry.
Nancy! Nancy.
I need coins.
I need to ring home.
- Reverse charges.
- What? Hello, operator? Vickers.
Cronulla.
What's your number? It's ringing.
I'll get it.
Vickers residence, Cheryl speaking.
I have Deborah Vickers on the line.
- Will you accept the charges? - No.
Cheryl, you bitch! Get my mum.
Mum! - Sorry about that.
- No wuckers.
She's such a bitch! I will remember them calling out your name on the loudspeaker until the day I die.
Gary Hennessy! Well, sounds like you two had a good old time while I was away, hey? Maybe I should have kept on driving.
Happy times, sad times.
It was a mix of emotions, wasn't it, Gary? An emotional salad.
I don't mind that you took another lover, Yvonne.
I can even understand it.
Let's not ruin But to bring another man into the family home and to screw him on the same sheets that you fuck your husband in front of our son? Well, that I cannot understand.
That's just not right.
I'm sorry Nothing I hate more than people feeling sorry for me.
Apologise to Gary.
Don't.
Mum don't.
Sorry, Gary.
What for? Stop listening to him.
Taking another lover into the family home.
It wasn't right.
Get back here! Take Graham to the club tomorrow.
Don't even know how long I'm gonna hang around for.
Clear the table.
Now.
I'm just having a little sit.
Don't make me count to three.
But my dinner's not digested properly.
I could get a stitch or slip into a coma I'm willing to take that risk.
Clear the table! Or a smack.
Now.
Your choice.
Good evening, Vickers residence.
Martin Vickers speaking.
Yes, I'll accept the charges.
Debbie? It's Debbie! I heard you! Debbie! Hello! Is it true, Mum? Is Cheryl sleeping in my bed? Oh, only for a little while.
You can't! I don't want her in my room.
I don't want her anywhere.
Calm down, darling.
You sent me here and then you move her in? You're replacing me! We're not.
Tell her we're not.
You should have asked me.
Sweetheart, I've been calling you nonstop.
I suppose we didn't realise you'd be this upset.
It's my room! I'm never gonna forgive you for this.
Every time I look you in the face there'll be a part of me that remembers this day.
I'm never gonna tell you anything and I'm never gonna be close to you ever again.
Sweetheart, it's nothing to get worked up about.
When you come and visit, Cheryl will stay in David's room.
When I VISIT? I think I made it worse.
It's not forever.
I want her OUT! Cheryl is on her best behaviour, I promise.
No-one can promise that.
Got a girlfriend, squirt? No.
I like talking to girls, but It's funny how I can never tell what they're thinking.
Funny that you care.
Sometimes girls hassle me to chase them around, and when I do, they dob.
Why do they do that? 'Cause they wanna go around with you.
Oh.
You're lucky to be a guy.
I don't feel lucky.
Sometimes I hate it.
Is that because you get a stiffy? No! - I saw you! - I didn't! Don't be a spaz.
I'm just saying.
If you wanna know about any of that stuff, you can ask me.
I need a Ribena.
You like having Cheryl here, don't you? - Yes.
- Do you think she's happy here? Yes.
Excuse me.
What? What are you up to? Rushing around all the time.
Talk to me.
- Now? - Mm-hm.
I'm just glad we're helping Cheryl out.
You know, she's been much happier now that Debbie bought her the abortion.
Who who told you about that? Well, I gave Debbie $10 from my Dollarmite account to help out, and one day I hope Cheryl shows that to me.
Don't ask her to.
I am an investor and it was a lot of money.
Excuse me, I must pass.
Can I see 'em? Should be a warning in there about how long they take to go away.
I had no idea.
What did you tell people they were? I didn't! I kept them hidden all week.
Cheryl tried to look but I fought her off.
Reckon she guessed it was me? As if.
She doesn't even know you exist.
I'd like to keep it that way.
You know we're not going round.
I know.
Then why are you getting so cut up about it? I'm not.
You don't want Cheryl to know who you are.
She enjoys making people's lives miserable.
Especially mine or anyone I might have rooted.
Have you rooted anyone else? None of your business.
Do you want to? Stop asking questions.
You know the rules.
What we do, it's just rooting.
And this is just a school bag.
My school bag.
And this is what the back of my head looks like.
I hope you like your new bucket.
I think you'll find it's a lot like your last one.
Cheryl, can I talk to you? Debbie's got the shits.
Wants me out? No.
I just wanted to say that I know you were pregnant and that you are no longer that way.
Someone's lying.
Oh, sweetheart.
Oh, you have built such a great big wall around yourself, haven't you? You've built it so high you're stuck inside there.
I tried not to think anything of it.
And when it happened, it didn't Things didn't seem that different.
But but they are.
Please don't kick me out.
Do you think something like this is gonna scare Judy Vickers off? Yes.
I did too.
But I'm still here.
Just think of it as a get-out-of-jail-free card.
There's only two in the pack.
David.
Come here.
How long have you been spying? Um, Dad Dad's just sitting in his car.
Excuse me, Cheryl.
What are you doing? Sitting.
Come inside? Annie's dead.
They found her washed up on the rocks.
Lovely Annie? From your work? Oh, no! Oh, Marty! How? All they could tell me was that a fisherman found her.
She'd been there all weekend, floating in the water.
And the fish would have had a go at her.
They do that.
They eat at the soft bits.
You're in shock.
Don't think about those things.
Come give us a hand! Here, boy! Come on, boy! Oi, ask him if he's got any change, Straccy.
Hey, Bruce? You got any change, mate? Hennessy! Come give us a hand.
You Gary Hennessy? - Yeah.
- Saw you surfing in the comp.
You're ace.
Yeah? My friend reckons you're a spunk.
He's got a girlfriend.
Rack off.
I can't see her anywhere.
Sorry, I'm not interested.
I am.
You can jump in the back of my van if you like.
Can I think about it? What's there to think about? So many things.
- Slack-arse moll! - Up yours! She was leaving.
What'd you do that for? Dunno.
Habit? Says he's got a girlfriend.
Well, it must be Friday night because I smell chicken in a basket.
It's delicious! Have some.
- No, thanks.
No, we ate before.
- Can I get you guys a drink? Well, I don't think I've ever said no to that question in my life.
To the bar! - House white, sweetheart.
- Yes, darling.
Oh, thank heavens you're here! I, um I I desperately need your help.
Oh, Von! Yes, you look so pale.
Try and go easy on him tonight, OK? He's had a He's had a bad afternoon.
You can count on me for tact, Judes.
I'm the king of tact.
Martin! It's a terrible, terrible thing.
I ended up doing intercourse with both of them.
- Hello, Pam.
- Ooh, hello, Judy.
Hello, Yvonne.
I was hoping I'd bump into you, Pam.
I've been judging your daughter for having an abortion.
And I wanted to say how sorry I am about that.
You thought Sue was pregnant? I did.
I found a receipt.
But, um, I've since found out that it was, in fact .
.
Cheryl.
She's confessed.
Oh, right.
Well, I could have told you that.
You knew? Sue told me.
Debbie didn't tell you? Uh how are you, Yvonne? More wine, Graham, when you're ready, darling.
Hey, hold onto your hat, Jude.
Go on, Yvonne.
Did you hear they found a body? - Where? - Dunno.
Washed up somewhere.
No-one knows what happened to her.
They reckon fish ate all her fingers off.
Who reckons? Just what I heard.
I'm getting a lift home with Greg.
Mr Candy's name is Greg? Knock it all you want, but I'd rather do it with him in a bed than in the back of a van covered in spoof and dirty frangers.
- Candy! - 'Night, sir! Shit.
Your old man doesn't wanna say g'day, Hennessy? Hennessy, where you going? After a rather energetic Swami Sarasvati session .
.
Ferris and I made wonderful, tender, urgent love.
But before I could catch my breath, he came right out and said that he knew about Graham.
Oh, my God! What did you do? Oh, I went straight over to Graham's house to end it.
But he professed his love and .
.
before I could say no, he took me straight up to his bedroom and we made love.
Had you had a shower? - No.
- Uh, Yvonne I think there's a term for that, you know.
Um I don't know what I'm doing, but I can't seem to end it with either Yvonne, sweetheart, just stop talking right now.
He's here.
I need a paper bag or or something.
Ladies.
Hello, darling.
You look flushed.
Too much wine.
Welcome home, Ferris.
- Drinks? - We're right.
Thanks anyway.
Gents.
You must be Graham.
You must be Ferris.
You must be needing a drink.
Can I offer to buy you one? Oh, I'd say that's the least you can do, wouldn't you say? Ah, look at her.
Hasn't been this happy in years.
Looks a little bit pissed to me.
All dressed up like a whore, and it's all for you.
Are you right, mate? I might just see if Judy would like another drink.
Or go.
- Ready to go, Judy? - Ready.
Ferris.
You're too close! Ferris.
Ferris, stop! Oh! Stay in the car! You alright, mate? You you right? Graham? Graham.
Graham? Can you hear us? I'll call an ambulance, darl.
Don't tell Debbie.
Please.
You can't ask me to do that.
Please don't ask me to do that.
She'll she'll drop me.
Look, sometimes a root is just a root and that's all it is, you know? I hate you.