Star vs. the Forces of Evil (2015) s02e04 Episode Script

1 [title music.]
It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird Gonna have a good time I ain't from 'round here I'm from another, woo-hoo Yeh-heah I'm talking rainbows I'm talking puppies Pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa Paah It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension [slurping.]
Huh.
Authentic Mexican horchata isn't supposed to have dairy in it.
So what? It isn't illegal to make horchatas with milk.
Are you sugaring your burrito? Food is anarchy, dude.
Live by your own rules.
[chomps.]
- Ugh.
- [muffled.]
Want some? - Keep your sacrilege off my taco! - Mmm.
Whoo! Do I feel alive! You sure you don't want a bite? - Definitely sure.
- Who's up for fireworks? I can't see how that'd be a good idea.
'Cause I totally wanna make fireworks.
Bright-Glow Pyro! Sparkling Spiral Noodle! Radical Rainbow Blast!! Rainbow glitter unicorn, gnome hat, kitty bacon, Hawaiian nightmare! Star, might wanna tone it down a notch.
[giggles.]
[siren blaring, distorts, then stops.]
[gasps.]
Ooh! [panting.]
What the heck was that?! I thought rainbows were made of light.
My rainbows are made of stuff, okay? Okay, okay, okay.
You just smashed a police car.
Oh, man.
No.
This is fine, this is fine.
What's the big deal, Marco? I've done this a thousand times.
I'll just have my dad give them some crowns.
- Call it even.
- Things don't work like that on Earth! Here, you'll go to prison.
- You mean like Saint O's? - It's worse than Saint O's.
They give you one bar of soap, and you have to make it last a whole year.
You gotta get up every day at 4:00 a.
m.
and make hash browns you're not allowed to eat.
And they force you to wear orange jumpsuits - every single day.
- [gasps.]
Orange?! Ai.
I don't know.
You tell me.
They noticed the dent.
I guess I could visit you in prison or whatever.
There's only one thing left for me to do.
- I'm gonna run away.
- Wait, wait, wait.
No, that's not running is worse.
- You can't stop me, rule boy.
- Star, wait! I'll contact you when I find a place to lay low.
[music.]
[gasps.]
Look, if you can't read, you can't do a crossword.
Whoa!! Oh! No one'll find me here.
Okay, first day in hiding.
Where to start? Shelter.
Okay, maybe something less conspicuous.
Not too shabby, if I do say so myself.
[clatter, splash.]
[sighs.]
Good enough.
[shivering.]
[squawks.]
[gasps.]
[all squawking.]
Well, what are you doing down here, sunshine? Uh, nothin'.
Just takin' a stroll.
[stomach growling.]
Well, sounds like someone's hungry.
I'm about to make some pancakes, if you'd like to join.
I do like pancakes.
Well, then, my house is right through hair.
Wait a second.
Did you just say hair? Of course not, my dear.
[bird squawks.]
Okay.
Mm, pancakes.
Welcome to 80 square feet of my own personal paradise.
Oh, your home is so cozy.
A radical tapestry.
- Would you like one pancake or two? - Five, please.
Wow! - Cool loft bed.
- Pancakes are ready.
So you gonna tell me what you did? - What do you mean? - Oh, hon, come on.
Folks don't come down to the river unless they broke some of the rules.
- Your secret's safe with me.
- Well okay.
So, like, I was with Marco at Britta's Tacos, and we were eating, and he was all, like, "Star, you can't put sugar on your burrito.
" - Mhm? - But what does he care, ya know? So then I ate the burrito and I wanted to see some fireworks.
Again, he's, like, "Star, don't fireworks your burrito," and it's all like, don't do this, don't do that.
[humming.]
- Hey.
My eyes are down here.
- Oh.
I'm sorry, dear.
Go on and finish your story.
So anyway, my rainbow smashed a cop car.
Jumped a fence and fell asleep in some garbage by the river, and now I'm here.
So what did you do? Oh, you know.
I steal hair.
Oh, why would you do that? [creepy music.]
Oh, no, no, no, sweetie.
It's not like that.
I don't take hair from people.
No, no, no.
It's more of like a back-alley kind of thing.
You know, dumpsters, behind hair salons, dog kennels discarded hair.
So you do, like, witchy stuff with the hair, right? Is that what this is? You some kind of witch? Oh, goodness no, dear.
You can do lots of things with hair.
I wove it into that tapestry you like so much.
Stuff your bed with it.
Heck, you can even make pancake batter from it.
[laughs.]
I'm just playin' with you.
But seriously, my favorite thing to do with the hair is to weave it into nests for all my wounded forest friends.
Aww! You can make anything from hair.
Well, anything but love.
Star, your family loves you.
Let's call them and tell them you're okay.
Oh.
No, no, no.
You don't have to do that! Just let me stay here with you.
See? I can sleep anywhere.
Look.
[snoring.]
But this is no life for a little girl.
Let me help you.
- No, thank you.
Aah! - Star! Wait.
Come back.
Hello.
Operator.
Whoa, whoa, stop.
Stop right there.
I said stop.
[dog barks.]
Who's walkin' who here? [gasps.]
[yawns.]
[knocking.]
[gasps.]
- Whoa.
- Excuse me.
What is going on? I'm fishing, hamster pats.
What does it look like? Now go on.
Hidin' out here.
You're gonna blow my cover.
Whoa, you, too? I, too, am hiding out, too.
Why didn't you say so? You've come to the perfect place.
An underwater hideout to hide your princess face You can make a shelter That's the pinkest thing I've ever seen.
Anything you want to - # Sweet and savory together # - Sugarritos! Nothing 'cause you got to - # You want to run a race # - I love sea horses.
- # But you want to take a nap too # - Actually, I just did.
You never have to Unless you really want to - # Pilot submarines # - [gasps.]
A sandwich! Anything you want to Stay dirty, stay clean How do you take a bath underwater? I bet you really want to You can learn le France Decorate a cake Trash the economy, turn someone to bones You can make a scrapbook Wait.
What was the thing before scrapbook? Anything you want to Whatever.
This is perfect.
- I can hide out here forever.
- # Only if you want to # Can he stop singing now? Anything you want Oh, it's cool.
Now I just gotta let Marco know I'm okay.
What's this missle-massle? - You can't go doing that now.
- But he'll be so worried.
No, no, no, you're hiding out.
You gotta lay low.
- Lay low? - Yeah.
You're on the lam.
You can do whatever you want down here, so long as you never see your family and friends again.
Wha? Never ever? Not even a bit.
So I'd have to spend the rest of my life here with just you? [scoffs.]
Don't be ridiculous.
I'm not real.
I'm just your brain trying to convince you you haven't made a big mistake.
Oh, no.
So I wrote that song? Enjoy the inside of your mind.
- [spits.]
Bleh-bleh-bleh.
- MAN: See anything? - What's over there? - WOMAN: Are those footprints? [gasps.]
Okay, I surrender! Just lock me up and put me in orange! Seeing Marco once a month is better than never again.
Marco.
You mean him? Star? You're okay! We were so worried.
How'd you find her? We have our ways.
You know, you shouldn't run away like that.
You really worried your friend here.
Lucky for you, we were gonna smash that old squad car anyway.
Wait, what? You were? At the annual police car demolition derby.
I was really looking forward to smashing it.
Phew! Well, if you won't be needing me.
[gulps.]
I'll just see myself out.
Just a moment.
You're not getting off that easy.
Uh You really can pull off jumpsuit orange.
I know, right? But enough of this manual labor.
It's magic time.
Star, isn't that what got you into this mess in the first place? No, Marco.
That was the rainbow glitter, unicorn gnome hat, kitty bacon, Hawaiian nightmare spell.
Super geyser windstorm! Ooh.
Yeah, that was totally me.
My bad.
Nobody panic.
I'll put it back.
[chittering.]
[music.]
I'm glad you're open.
I'm starving.
I'd like some porridge, please.
[snaps fingers.]
No! This is mud.
That's not funny.
You messed with the wrong bird, rat.
Face-melting death ray! Huh? [shrieks.]
Ow! [growls.]
[humming.]
Star! [gasps, crashes.]
It's your turn to take out the garbage.
Marco, you've ruined my Mewni battleship.
Don't you think you have enough ships in a bottle? - Enough? I don't even know you.
- Come on.
We told Mom and Dad we'd have the place cleaned up before they got home, and garbage is all yours.
Oh, fine! Summoning cloudy charm.
Cloudy, could you take out the gar [wheezing.]
Cloudy? Halo? [wheezing.]
[rattles.]
- Cloudy? - Oh, hey, Star.
- Uh, are you okay? - Yeah.
Perfectly fine.
Okay.
Could you take out the garbage? Sure can.
I guess princess hands are too delicate to touch garbage.
- What? - Oh, nothing.
Excuse me.
Pardon me.
I got a mouthful of garbage.
I don't know, girls.
Maybe this isn't what it looks like.
It looks like a magic wand.
But What did I say?! Follow three feet behind me.
Three! Yeah, anyway, I don't know, maybe it's just a baby rattle.
What are you doing? No.
No, put it down! No, no, no.
Let go, you nasty, nasty thing.
You let go of my thing! [gasps.]
What?! Do it again.
Not you, you stupid [shrieks.]
I said not you, bird! [gasping.]
Do it again.
[evil laughter.]
It's working, girls.
Oh, no, no.
No, no! I was kidding.
No.
Please, let me go.
Let me go! Don't let me go! [screams.]
[groaning.]
Oh, no.
What happened? [groaning.]
- I had an accident.
- [loudly.]
Glossaryk! - Inside voices, please.
- Oh, sorry.
Yeah.
Uh, Glossaryk, there's something funky happening with my wand.
- Oh.
What's wrong with it? - It's acting weird.
It's not doing what it's supposed to.
Look, Star, maybe there's something wrong with you.
You ever think about that? - And what's that supposed to mean? - Uh, I'm not 100% sure.
I guess it means there's something wrong with everyone.
I mean, look at me.
I did magic on my own face.
- You know? - No help as usual.
It hurts everywhere! MARCO: Star, you're taking care of the garbage, right? Yeah.
I got Cloudy to do it.
Uh, about that [giggling.]
I don't know why I have so much energy today.
Must be all that iced tea.
No, girls, it's gonna get ugly.
[mice squeaking.]
[Ludo humming.]
A bowl of your finest mud, sir.
Mm, I can taste it already.
[snaps fingers.]
Ah! All done.
Do your worst! [laughing.]
- Ah! Whoopsie! - What's with him? - Cloudy, you stop this right now.
- Giddy-up! - Are you listening to me? - Whee! [glass shatters.]
Stop playing around and clean all this up.
Uh-oh.
Looks like someone's allergic to good vibes.
[Cloudy laughs.]
Okay, that's enough.
Sunshine friendship.
[mocking.]
"Sunshine friendship.
" - Oopsie.
- My Mewni battleships! [growling.]
Sunshine friendship spell! Hey! That was sooooo rude! [music.]
No, girls.
I'm fine.
Come on, hit me like you mean it! Now you're really starting to tick me off.
Run.
[evil cackling.]
Cloudy, you're out of control! That's it! Enough! Hey! You poked my fluffies! I think you're making him worse.
You gotta stop! Star! Marco! Raspberry ribbon lasso! Sunshine friendship spell! Oh! [giggles.]
- You okay? - Yeah, thanks to you.
[Cloudy giggling.]
Whoa! What a mess! What happened? - Yeah, what was up with your wand? - I have no idea.
Kids, we got you ice cream for cleaning the house.
[gasp.]
Oh, Star, it is always exciting with you around.
This'll take us all weekend to clean.
Oh, no, no.
I've got this.
Tidying up tidal wa You know what? Give me that thing.
Oh, that's way better! [panting.]
Now give me some porridge.
[music.]
I think Earth is a pretty great place That's saying something 'Cause I've been through outer space I think it suits me, it's just my style I think I'm gonna stay a little while I think that strangers are just friends You haven't met I'm blasting monsters and I never break a sweat I'm really thinking I could call this place home