Five Bedrooms (2019) s02e05 Episode Script

1
- Previously onFive Bedrooms
- Arggh!
It looks like you're
gonna have to have surgery.
What does that
mean in real terms?
No more footy, and he'll
have to rethink his career.
You're just on your
third beer, then?
Gotta have something to
get through the pain.
- Elizabeth Wendell. Hello.
- Hello.
Joseph!
And also with you.
Sorry, are you talking
about open relationships?
- You don't have to do this.
- No, I want to try.
Apparently, your work
ethic's gone to shit,
you're late all the time and
you're snapping at staff.
As nurse unit manager, I'm
giving you an official warning.
I always knew I'd been
put on this earth to nurse.
All under control, Mr Steer.
Don't you move a muscle.
Helping people is
all I've ever done.
Wednesday was just peanut butter
and ham and lettuce on white bread.
Thursday was just butter
and raw corn. Oh, and chalk.
- Yes, all pretty standard.
- Mmm.
Just how big are my
nipples going to get?
No-one knows.
The problem is, I never
knew where to draw the line.
You forgot the popcorn machine.
He hates popcorn.
- That's Louie.
- Hate it.
Have you packed the fitted
sheets and the toilet paper?
I'll call you as soon
as I've unpacked.
If you change your mind,
you want to come home,
there's no shame in that.
Yes, there is! That would be
absolutely tragic for everyone.
He's old enough to go to
war, for Christ's sake.
- Get in the car.
- Beautiful moment, Mum.
Love you, mate.
- Morning, Heath. Got a minute?
- Not really.
Just need you in early tomorrow.
We've got an 8am
with Yvonne from HR.
- What, both of us?
- Yep.
- What for?
- Can't tell you.
- Are you serious?
- Yes.
You seriously not gonna
tell me what this is about?
I'm asking you
nicely. Be on time.
What, we not giving
you enough to do?
Oh, no, I wasn't. I'm just
OK, I did hear a few
Not enough to
Just, I got the sense
Is Heather in trouble?
Just get her here
on time tomorrow.
Yvonne is not a patient woman.
And if Heather goes into
that meeting 40 minutes late,
acting like herself, then
Is it about the lateness?
I'm not saying
anything else, Liz.
The profanity? The hairclips?
Is it about the bullying?
Oh, my God.
Just keep her calm.
Mate, all you gotta
do is turn up.
You'd be a glorified doorman. All you
have to do is open the door for people.
You only need one
good arm for that.
Joseph's not talking
about a new career.
It's just a stopgap.
- Exactly.
Yeah, I know.
But I want to take some time
and really think
about what I do next.
You know. Get a plan happening.
If if I could just chime in.
You know, really,
once upon a time, um,
the idea of working
as a receptionist
in an aged-care facility
would have been deeply
offensive to me.
- It's perfectly understandable.
But despite my
initial misgivings,
it's actually been
incredibly rewarding.
You know, sometimes I will
just catch a moment between
a patient and a staff member,
and it's a privilege.
I mean, I'm a
receptionist, yes, but
you know, I'm also a patron
in the theatre of humanity.
Is that
what you'redoing?
I'm wiping arses
and you're a patron in
the theatre of humanity?
And I'm happy for you,
Lizzie. That's spot-on.
But it's just not for me.
Listen, I've been
throwing this bloke
a lot of business
over the years, mate.
You just have to literally
turn up and cash the cheque.
Joe, you don't have
to flick me a pity job
just to impress Lizzie.
Wow. OK.
Nice one, mate.
You're all class, Benno.
And on that note
take care of yourself,
and, uh, you know,
when things turn to
shit, give us a call, OK?
Um, Liz, um
do you think we could maybe
have a little word outside?
Is that? Yeah?
Uh goodbyes have never
really been a strength
of the Chigwell men.
Um Liz.
Uh
In regard to Ben's
parting comment,
I mean, you know,
obviously, there's
you know, there's
there's an attraction here.
Well well, there
there is on my part. Um
I don't know. Maybe
maybe it's a one-way street.
There might have been some
light traffic on the other side.
OK, well, then I'm sure
that you agree that
it it would be a mistake.
Of course.
So, why exactly?
Oh, oh s-sorry, Ben indicated
that you and him have a
bit of a romantic past?
I see.
You know, I think stirring
in that crossover
Well, I wouldn't exactly call
it crossover, but, yeah, sure.
OK. Well, I'm
really glad that
We're talking a
matter of minutes
in a caravan before we moved in.
Oh, yeah, he didn't really
go into the detail
I mean, if anything,
it just confirmed
that Ben and I are
bereft of any chemistry.
I mean, I didn't
even take my bra off.
OK, I I'm don't
know what that means.
Well, I don't know
why I said it.
Well, um
enjoy Singapore, Joseph.
I'll, uh
I'll try.
I might just
- Is that really necessary?
- What?
You couldn't knock that stubby
off before you came to bed?
Well, I was I was
gonna read for a bit.
Is that a problem?
I'm, you know
just not a big fan of
beer fumes in the bedroom.
Alright.
Fix that.
Is it possible that you
might be drinking too much?
No. Only had four
beers in the last
sorry, five beers in the
last two and a half hours.
Oh, right. And that's
supposed to reassure me?
Yep.
Look, I'm not saying
don't drink at all.
I'm just saying
maybe you cap it to
one or two a day.
- Duly noted.
"Duly noted" you agree,
or "Duly noted, thanks for your two
cents' worth, shove it up your arse"?
Oh!
Look, I know you're
only trying to help,
but I don't need you to tell
me how much I can drink.
I don't want to have these
conversations with you.
- Then don't.
- Well, someone has to!
- Does it have to be you?
- OK, who else is gonna do it?
You're not my fuckin' mother!
I didn't Oh, fuck.
- Good morning!
- Why are you yelling at me?
- Sorry?
- I'm right here.
Um, I took the liberty
of making you a coffee.
Thank you.
Could I offer you
a breakfast muffin,
fruit salad or protein smoothie?
- No.
- OK.
Also, don't forget you've
got that meeting at 8am.
- I'll be in the car.
- Right behind you!
OK, Heather slept in
my bed last night.
I think her and Ben had a fight.
What?! What about?
I don't know. I couldn't
get anything out of her.
She just lay there seething
and clearing her throat.
Did Ben did he
sleep in Simmo's tent?
Come in for a feed
if you want, mate.
What the hell
happened in that room
that they both had to leave it?
Good morning!
- Morning.
Look, I think Heather is walking
into a situation at work.
I think she could be in trouble.
Not serious trouble?
All I know is that if she goes
in there angry, I don't know
Liz! What the
fuck are you doing?!
OK, coming! Sorry!
Just before your meeting, I
thought it'd be a good idea
for us to take a moment.
- What for?
- Centre ourselves.
To be alone with our thoughts.
I don't want to be
alone with my thoughts.
Sometimes, I find it
helpful to imagine
the negative things
in my life as
as leaves.
And and what I do
is, is I picture those
leaves
falling down from a tree
into a a babbling brook.
And then I watch those
leaves floating away
floating away
Oh, Jesus Christ,
Liz! Just spit it out.
- What?
- You obviously know something.
Do you have any intel about
what I'm walking into today?
Course you don't. You're
a fuckin' receptionist.
Right. Thank you
for coming in early.
Not a problem. Uh, is
this about the lateness?
No, it's not just
about the lateness.
This is about an issue that has been
brought to us by a number of staff.
O-OK. The, uh
the communal fridge.
It's not the fridge, Heather.
No, this issue is
specifically about you.
What about me?
To be clear,
no-one's questioning your
competence as a nurse.
No, what we're questioning
is your personal behaviour.
What does that mean?
There have been several accusations
of bullying made against you.
A number of staff and
at least one patient
have, when questioned, said that
they have felt bullied by you.
What exactly are we saying
constitutes bullying here?
Intimidation and name-calling.
Is it because I
called Karl a dipshit?
Because if you saw the
way he puts an IV in,
you'd know that's practically
a term of endearment.
Karl doesn't see it
that way, Heather.
The point of
this meeting is
to avoid any further escalation.
It's actually to
help you, Heather.
Is it?
Or is it just PC
bullshit gone mad,
trying to 'help'
the only dickhead
who actually pulls her own
fucking weight around here?
Right, that's a second warning,
and it's going in the book.
You know what, Yvonne?
You go ahead, you
put it in your book,
and then you can shove it
up your pencil-pushing arse.
- Heather!
- I have spent my best years
going above and
beyond for you people,
and this is what I get?
Well, get fucked. I quit.
Hello.
It's Colin.
Don't let on it's me.
- Is Heather on the premises?
- No, she's at work.
Who is there, please?
Um Harry and me, and I
think Ben's here somewhere.
I am on approach.
Bullying?
And in response, she blew up
and quit the nursing home.
- What?! - Oh, my God.
- When did that happen?
Oh, almost 40 minutes ago.
And she called you?
No, I called her about
Timmy's kitchenware dramas.
And let's just say
she needed an outlet,
and I became that outlet.
She considers herself
the innocent victim here,
but I think we all know
Heather Doyle has
a bullying problem.
- I don't reckon.
- Oh, come on, mate.
We all love her enough
to turn a blind eye,
but now it's starting
to hurt other people.
Um, she can definitely
be vehement
But it comes from a good place.
Oh, heart of gold, no
question. But she's guilty.
And the time has come for
one of us to tell her.
I vote you.
Mmm. As the old
flame, I would have.
But, alas, that baton
has been passed.
No, I'm probably not
the man for that job.
- Just right at the moment.
- Why is that?
Rather not get into it.
- Harry.
Come on, Harry. She
won't attack you.
Who else is gonna write
her Valium prescriptions?
I assure you, she lashes
out at me very regularly.
Then it's gotta be you, Ains.
You're the only one she
won't attack full throttle.
She can still attack me
without hurting the baby.
- You do realise that?
Yeah. OK. She won't.
She won't risk it.
- What?
- Where are they?
Heather!
This is a surprise.
Surprise? I live here.
Oh, jeez!
I just meant
you're home early.
I won't ask what's going
on with you and Heather.
Mmm. I appreciate that.
But for what it's worth,
I've been there.
Done my time in the doghouse.
Basically said
fuck-all in my defence
And let me say, if you ever
need a pair of shoulders
to take some of the weight
off that big old rig of yours,
you feel free to use mine.
Arseholes, plural,
made an official complaint
Thank you, Col.
The more I think about it,
the more I reckon it was Karl.
He's totally incompetent.
He can't even make eye
contact with the oldies.
I mean, if I wasn't there
to clean up his mistakes,
he'd probably kill someone,
but somehow I'mthe arsehole.
You're not an arsehole.
No. No, you are a a very
- Passionate.
- Yeah.
A passionate and
and hardworking woman.
With the purest of intentions.
But sometimes, Heath
sometimes you can
be slightly
Bullish?
Oh, shit.
What?
- Confident.
- Yeah.
Confident, in
in a way that could
be construed as
as aggressive.
Is there another way out
of here or is this it?
Or you
know, intimidating.
Slightly.
Just to some people.
Well.
Thank you.
Perfect day for you
to find the balls
to tell me how you really feel.
- Oh, no.
- Heath
No, Harry, listen, I hope
it works out with Xav,
'cause the next time
you need someone
to drive your dating app,
give your mother a call.
- Oh, come on.
- And any further questions
about your nipples or
how often you're farting
can probably go through
Google from now on.
Uh
Look, solid effort,
Ains. Terrific start.
I think there's more to say
in the fullness of time,
but, uh you did very well.
For the first time
in years, I had nowhere to be.
Just me and my thoughts.
It wasn't a happy place.
Liz, your face is very
triggering for me right now.
- So if this isn't urgent
- I had a word with Pat.
After you left.
Apparently, if you
pop in tomorrow
and offer a full apology to her,
Yvonne and the entire staff,
they will consider
re-examining the situation.
Meapologise to them?
I am but the humble messenger.
Would you like me to respond
on your behalf in some way?
What is my face telling you?
Oh, this seems like a trap.
But OK.
Is it saying, "Liz, I appreciate
you offering this information.
"Leave me now, please,
and run for your life"?
Close enough.
OK, Harry. You're up.
No, no, no. I've I've
already tried. We both have.
No, no, we are all committing
to a minimum of
three attempts each.
If she doesn't do a
complete 180 in 12 hours,
they will not let her back.
Is there any chance
that's what she wants?
- She doesn't.
- She only thinks she does.
But that's just the
rage and the adrenaline.
When when thatwears off and
she realises what she's done
OK. Would they accept
a written apology?
I know all her
internet passwords.
Has to be a full face-to-face
with the entire staff
in 12 hours.
No.
I think you guys are
all overthinking this.
Seriously, when somebody
quits their job on a whim,
there's only thing you can do.
You take 'em to the
loudest club you can find
and you get 'em smashed.
- Mmm.
- Mmm.
No, I'm tell I'm telling you.
That's how you crack her open.
Oh, that approach might work
with some people, but
- Not to Heather.
- No, definitely not.
Well, why don't I
just ask her, then?
Uh
Uh Harry, I hope you
enjoyed your time together.
No, thank you!
I come bearing wine.
- Enter.
OK, full disclosure -
we're also going to a club.
All of us. So that includes you.
I'm not going anywhere.
And I'm certainly not going
anywhere with noise or people.
I understand, and I empathise,
but you will find no peace here.
They're not gonna
leave you alone.
They are planning
waves of interventions.
It's terrifying.
Counselling. Mindfulness.
Mmm - somebody mentioned
cupping at some point.
Ainsley has nine
self-help books.
Fine. I'll just lock the door.
Most of them are audiobooks.
They'll just come
straight through the door.
Well, I'll put on
noise-cancelling headphones
and I'll drug myself to sleep.
They're not gonna let you sleep.
So, you can endure that,
or
We go some place so loud,
you're not gonna hear
a single word they say.
Where?
Get changed.
We're all going to DPs.
What?!
I need details.
- Every single word you said.
- No. This is not reality.
- Is it Double Punch?
Nope.
- Is it Double Pop?
- Keep guessing.
Uh And it is definitely
DPs? Not DVs or Bs?
Is it
Double Penetration?
Oh, Heath! You look so
- Shut up.
- You look incredible.
- Just shut your face.
- You really do.
How hard is it to not say words?
- We're just trying to
- Not hard.
In fact, it's easier
than sayingwords.
You heading out, are you?
We are going clubbing.
Have a good night.
You too.
- Cheers. Down the hatch.
Come on, Heather.
Cheers!
Whoo-hoo!
Whoo! Alright, another one.
Ahh!
Is this the best you could do?
- It's empty.
- Yeah.
I promised you
noise, not crowds.
I thought you'd be happy.
Alright, let's let's
go again. Come on.
How are you feeling?
- The tequila's helping.
- Excellent.
Have you had a chance to
talk to Ben since last night?
I came here specifically
to avoid this, Ains.
OK.
Ben said.
"You're not my fucking mother."
Oh.
I'm sure he didn't mean it.
I mean, he's on a lot of oxy.
He knew what he was saying.
What is the deal with you
and the loaded brother?
Nothing. It's flatlined.
- I don't understand.
- No, neither do I.
Do you know what
Not only did I make a complete
dick of myself with Joseph,
do you know what
really burns me up?
Please.
What? Tell me.
When when Harry
and I started our
our mission to achieve more sex,
do you know, my big concern
was, "How is Harry gonna cope"
"when I start racking
up all these numbers?"
Turns out the exact
number - zero.
Fucking loser!
I even bumped up my age range
in the dating apps to 55.
And the only person
I have slept with
since my spin in the caravan
my ex-husband.
Well, that is gonna change.
Because tonight
you're gonna pick up.
Alright, there's, like,
a dozen people here,
so I think the odds
Liz, Liz. Look at you.
Come on.
- Shots.
- Perfect.
Oh. Thank you. Oh.
- OK. Come on, Heather.
- Come on. Up, up, up, up, up.
- Just just one song.
We can do this the easy
way or the hard way.
- Come on.
- Up, up, up, up, up.
Oh!
- Yeah. You know you want to.
- Oh, come on.
An obscene amount of money
has been thrown over that bar.
Just give us something.
OK, fine!
If you can get Lucinda Williams,
Loretta Lynn or the Waifs
through the
speakers, I'll dance.
I don't know who any
of those people are.
They're all tortured
country singers.
- Good luck.
- Ugh.
Hi.
Could we persuade you
to play a request?
I know it's such an insult,
but we wouldn't be asking
if this wasn't a
life-or-death situation.
I suppose you're a doctor?
Oh, my God! I actually
am. I kid you
- Like, I'm a surgeon.
- He is!
Well, no-one's dying
per se, but, uh,
but I can confirm we do have
a legitimate musicemergency.
- What's the song?
Loretta Lynn.
Lucinda Williams?
- Or the Waifs!
- Whoa. OK.
Listen, if I play any of that,
I'm never coming
back here again.
There's, like, two
people dancing.
Yeah, and I can't
afford to lose 'em.
I understand the gravity of
what we're asking you to do,
but we are dealing
with a middle-aged lady
in a huge amount of pain,
and if she doesn't dance off
at least some of the
alcohol she's consumed,
there's a very real
chance she could implode.
I'd I'd love to help,
really, genuinely
Would it make any difference
if if I bought you a beer?
- I get those for free.
- Well, a cocktail, then.
As as a gesture
of goodwill. OK? OK?
- OK.
- Wait.
- Why'd you go?
- That man was into you.
What?!
Harry, he was flirting with you.
No, he wasn't!
Harry, I know fuck-me
eyes when I see them.
Oh, my God.
That particularly
cute guy is into you,
and I'm into the idea that
you might be into him.
And everything else
is up to you.
Simmo, I've got it.
OK, Heather cracked.
Apparently, Ben said to her.
"You're not my mother."
- Well, that's alright. It's
- What?
No. No, no. No,
Simmo, it's terrible.
Well, if it's mymum, sure, but.
Benny's mum, that's
pretty much a compliment.
- No, Simmo, um
- You should see her, Ains.
Sandy Chigwell.
Not only is she a delightful
conversationalist,
she was model material.
She's still a very
good-looking lady, you know.
OK, Simmo, it it
would be the equivalent
of someone describing you as
a man who never returns a shout.
Shit. Really?
- He needs to apologise.
- Leave it with me.
I hear you. I feel you. I'm
all over it like a mad rash.
Oh, I'm pretty tired, mate.
Well, stir yourself, son.
This chat is
happening right now.
Now, we both know
how I felt about your
mum when I was younger.
What?!
We both know how hot she was,
still is, and anyone who met her
would be proud to be compared
to Sandy Chigwell, yeah?
Not so much Heath, mate.
Oh, what did they tell you?
Well, this is just
coming from Ains,
and that's pretty
much all she said.
Oh, I didn't mean she
was like my actual mum.
I just meant that
- Fuckin' hell!
- Mmm.
You know, it wasn't
even about her.
I was pissed and I was just
arcing up about everything.
Most of it was really about Joe.
Well, maybe tell her
that, mate. Yeah?
Go in hard with an apology
and maybe stress that
she's nothing like your mum.
Tell her she's so
youthful, she's like J.Lo.
Nah. J.Lo's older
than you think, mate.
Well, tell her she'd probably
still fit into Mia's clothes.
- What?
- Yeah, don't don't say that.
But say something,
mate, whatever it takes.
Just fix it.
- You fair dinkum?
- Hey?
Were you really
that into my mum?
Oh, it was mostly at the
tail end of year eight.
A few weeks in the summer
of 2013, if I'm honest.
Yeah. She wore a hell
of a dress to your 30th.
- Come on.
- I still think about it.
Alright.
I know this one!
You could have a
little move to this.
I agreed to very specific terms.
OK, you know what? I am
five months pregnant.
I've been here for 12 rounds,
and every time Liz took a shot,
she flicked me with tequila.
It's seeping into my skin.
I googled it - I could
already be drunk.
I have earned this dance.
That's disgraceful, using
your unborn child like that.
Get up!
- Come on!
- Here she comes! Whoo!
- Whoa!
- Come on!
- Come on, Heather!
Come on, Heather.
You know you want to.
Yes, queen!
- Whoo!
Timmy?
Timmy?
Who is that?
Timmy!
Oi, Timmy! Why are you
walking away from me?
What's happening here?
What what are you wearing?
- Why are you here?
- It wasn't my idea.
Timmy. Timmy. Can you just
just talk to me for one minute?
Not right now.
Look, I mean, you know, if
you're into boys, then
- Oh, my God!
- I don't give a shit.
- I couldn't care less.
- Then why are you asking?
Mate!
I'm out of the house,
I am off my face,
I have just seen
my son in a dress
for the first time in my life,
and I don't understand
what I'm seeing.
- What does it look like?
- I don't know.
Are you in
Are you into cross-dressing?
- Or are are you trans?
- No!
- Well, what what is it?
Is it some kind of kind
of kind of dress-up?
I'm gender-fluid.
What does that mean?
- Tim Timmy.
I don't care what you are.
I just want to understand.
Look, if you're worried
about your dad finding out,
I will not tell him.
Dad already knows.
Oh, for fuck's sake!
Stop walking away from me!
Fuck's sake! Just
leave me alone!
We both know I'm
not gonna do that.
Just just give me 10 minutes.
- Five.
- Eight.
Three.
Please.
Hurry up.
Does it feel
does it mean that you feel
a bit more like a woman?
Sometimes.
It changes.
I don't know. I'm
still figuring it out.
How long have you felt this way?
Since high school.
But since you left, I
I've been able to
feel freer
To explore it.
It was peaceful in a way it
never was when you were there.
Dad wanted to talk
to us all the time.
No! See, you make that face
because you have no idea.
That was exactly what I needed.
He was emotional and vulnerable,
and all you ever did
was run him down for it.
- That's not true.
- That's all you ever do.
And then you left him,
traded up for the most
masculine man on earth.
How do you think
that made me feel?
I I didn't think.
No, you fuckin' didn't.
And I didn't tellDad.
I didn't need to. He
saw it before I did.
He brought it up.
What?
Nothing.
I'm just listening.
- I'm gonna put her in a cab.
- She's done so well.
More dancing?
I love this song.
Harry's gonna get you in a cab.
Oh, thank God.
Alright.
Bye.
Um, your friend
that just left, um
is she pregnant?
Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
So, do you usually come to clubs
with pregnant women and
middle-aged country fans?
Oh, yeah, th-that's
pretty much my posse.
And the other friend?
The guy?
Oh, no, he he's not
a friend. He's, um
- Boyfriend?
- Yeah.
That's a shame.
Not necessarily.
Well, look, if the if the
two of you want to kick on,
I live around the corner.
Can you promise me
this isn't the end
of the conversation?
I love you so much.
You know, I can live with stuffing
up pretty much everything else.
But not you.
- Or Louie.
- Or Louie.
- Or Dad.
- Or your dad.
I miss you, mate.
Can I have a hug?
You just tell me what you want.
I
want to go back to my friends
and pretend like
this never happened
and scull seven shots in a row.
Then go do it.
- Not with you.
- Yeah, I got that.
Did you do this?
In a way.
I'm gonna act like
I don't know you.
I know.
Boo!
You've been dancing
literally all night.
Why are you standing still now?
What? I can't!
I have campaigned
literally for hours.
This DJ is is risking his
entire career. Where's Heather?
We can't leave her
up there by herself.
Now we're talking!
Oh! Come on!
There she is!
Hey, yeah! Whoo!
How are you feeling?
I don't know.
There's a lot of
thoughts. And tequila.
And thoughts.
But are you having fun?
The DJ just told me he
lives around the corner.
I might be getting
the wrong message
No, no, no. He he wants
you to go home with him.
Actually, I'm pretty
sure he wants both of us.
This is absolutely up to you.
Let's do it.
Liz, I don't know
what I'm going to, but
I'm going to go with
Xavier and the DJ.
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah. Are you gonna be OK?
Yep. Yes! Yeah! Go. Go. Run.
No, um but, um,
just be safe and
take lots of mental photos.
OK.
Uh you do realise
it's 2:30 in the morning?
Your point is?
Uh no no point.
I don't know if
it was the heavy drinking
or the exhaustion,
but something had shifted.
Morning, love.
What time is it?
It's early, Col.
Feels early.
Do we need a coffee?
This won't take long.
Just want to say a few
things face-to-face.
OK.
Hit me.
I'm so sorry if I've
ever made you feel
small in any way.
Because you are a
magnificent father
and a kind, attentive.
beautiful man.
Heath, I've just woken up.
Shut up. Just
let me get this out.
Thank you,
for being there for our sons.
For hearing them and
and and seeing them
when I didn't.
Go back to bed.
Oh, my God. She's early.
Good morning, Pat. Yvonne. Liz.
Everyone.
Would you like to come
through to the office?
I just want to
apologise to all of you.
I know I'm not the easiest
person to be around,
and, uh if I've
hurt anyone's feelings
or made you uncomfortable
or just made life harder
for you in any way,
then I'm genuinely sorry.
Pat.
You've been an incredible
support to me over the years.
And I'm gonna miss you.
- Wha what
- I'm gonna miss all of you.
- What are you doing?
- Thank you, everyone.
For everything.
Did you have a good night?
Yeah.
I wrote myself off,
drank too much,
danced like a fool,
cried like a baby and, um
I quit my job again.
You quit your?
- What? When?
- Just now, on the way home.
But the lowest point of
the night, and
Perhaps my entire life
is finding out that I
have truly failed my son.
What do you mean?
Timmy
is gender-fluid.
I don't unders
I don't understand.
All I know is that he's
been trying to find himself
and he couldn't tell me.
Because I scare the
shit out of him.
- I'm basically an animal.
- Oh!
Well, then so am I.
I mean, you're
talking to someone
who dropped out of their kid's
life for nearly two years.
You know, so you didn't know
where Timmy was for a while.
You know now.
You've always been a
terrific mother to me.
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding. That one was just
sitting there. I had to do it.
Heather, I'm so sorry
about what I said to you.
It's fine.
I've had bigger smacks than
that in the last 24 hours.
Really?
'Cause that was probably
the bloody worst thing
I could have said to you.
Hey. You know I didn't mean it.
You want me to leave you alone?
I love you, Ben.
You know that?
Yeah.
Yeah, for a while now.
Still
It feels good to
hear it out loud.
I love you too.
And
I don't want to be a smart-arse
but
I haven't had a beer
or an oxy in 17 hours,
and you're off your face.
Next time onFive Bedrooms
Evie is now officially
on the waitlist
for St Alena's Ladies' College.
It would have been
nice to be consulted.
I've engaged the services
of my ex-husband.
- What, you prefer just blind support in silence, do you?
- Yes.
Isn't that exactly what
you're accusing Harry of?
You're having three-ways
purely to make Xavier happy.
Liz, just because you've failed
at more relationships than I have
doesn't make you
any sort of expert.
- You alright?
Get Heather.
Lachlan!
Lachlan Best! Lachlan!