Harvey Beaks (2015) s02e05 Episode Script

1 [cheerful music.]
Harvey Harvey Harvey [cheerful music.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[loud smooching.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[giggling.]
[camera shutter clicks.]
[upbeat music.]
Irving: Cheers to good times with old buddies.
Moss: Old buddies, indeed.
You know, I can't even remember the last time - we got to hang out one-on-one.
- Seriously.
Moff, I'm sorry about not being around as much as I used to.
Everything just gets kind of crazy with a family, and now with another baby on the way ah, you know what I mean.
I wasn't listening to a word you said.
I always zone out when you talk about your family.
So how shall we begin this glorious day? Perhaps watch a ribald buddy comedy? Play an L-rated video game? Compose a rock opera? [guitar strums.]
Well, heck, let's do it all.
I got no responsibilities today.
[knocking at door.]
Oh, that must be the pizzas I ordered.
Irving, I need your help! - Baby.
- What? - Doctor.
- Doctor? - Ten minutes.
- Uh.
I have to go to work at the library.
Oh, oh, I completely forgot! [exclaiming.]
But hilarious buddy comedy? Sorry, Moff, I I got to take a rain check.
[sighs.]
Guess I should just go get into my sweatpants.
[phone ringing.]
Yes, Irving.
Harvey can stay at my place.
[phone beeps.]
[music.]
You know what I love about being a kid? [groans.]
There's just so many things I don't understand yet.
- Like, what even is this thing? - No, no, no, no! - Rule number one: no touching.
- Got it.
I love rules.
Hey, Harvey, we saw you come over here to play.
- Oh, hey, guys.
- [groaning.]
Too many children! I agreed to babysit one monster, not three.
Hey, Moff, what's this stuff called again? Smoke junk? Uh, smoke stacks? It's called steampunk and, also, stop.
Well, can we play video games, please? [groaning.]
Quit touching my stuff! Moff, you kind of seem upset.
Did I do something wrong? Oh, yes.
[dramatic music.]
You ruined my life.
What? Your father and I used to be first-class pals, a real dream team, and then he got busy and started making babies.
You ruined my friendship with Irving! I'm a a friendship-ruiner? Oh, great.
I try so hard to suppress unpleasant emotions, and now they're all over the place.
All right.
[leaf blower hums.]
Everyone out.
[leaf blower humming.]
Harvey, you okay? [somber music.]
What am I but a wedge driven between brothers? Oh, man, he only gets sadly poetic when he's really bummed.
[sighs.]
[music.]
Is it is it really my fault? Moff was right.
I I destroyed my Dad's life.
I'm a bad son! [groaning.]
[grunts.]
[groaning.]
[steam hissing.]
Is it true? Did I Did I do that? [groans.]
Steampunk [echoing.]
steampunk steampunk [instrumental music.]
[shimmering chimes.]
Gears.
Get your gears here.
Gears of all shapes and sizes for all your steampunk needs.
- Oh, wow.
Those look great.
- Yes, sir, and I think I have the perfect gear for you right here.
Oh, hold on a second.
- Here you are.
- Oh, wow.
It's perfect.
Thank you.
No, thank you.
[music.]
[sighs.]
I'm just a little gear boy Selling my gears Year after year I'm not rich or big I'm poor and I'm small But who cares when I live in the best city Of all Steamberg! Every little cog and gear Yes, every little pipe and valve I love them all so dear Every curly mustache has a smile 'Cause in Steamberg, you can't help but just be happy All the while There's gears and goggles And goggles and gears And goggles, goggles, goggles, goggles Goggles, goggles, and gears Look, there's a robot on the street He's made of copper Wow, that's really, really, really neat.
This wondrous place where I belong As long as I can stay here Nothing ever will go wrong You might say this genre's lame But the steam, it calls my name - [whispering.]
Harvey.
- Oh, hello.
And today this steampunk city's gonna fly La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la Are you excited for the big day, sir? Why, yes, of course, steam butler.
Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi [clears throat.]
Would you like me to leave while you sing, sir? Yes, this is a personal ballad.
You may go.
Yes, sir.
[clears throat.]
As mayor of Steamberg I've done quite a lot Built up this great city It's true And now thanks to Irving the Inventor I've got The power to fly Steamberg To the big blue When you're living here in Steamberg All: # It's like living in a Dreamberg # Every person is impassioned With impractical old fashions - # Is it the future? - Or the past? # - # Who even cares? - Crowd: 'Cause it's a blast.
# All: # Our spirits will be high # Once our mayor makes this steampunk city Fly [feet tapping.]
[breathing heavily.]
[feet tapping.]
[sighing.]
[gasping.]
[coughing.]
[chuckles.]
[feet tapping.]
[chuckling.]
[feet tapping.]
Ha.
Woman: Is he Is he done? Okay.
[all cheering.]
Ah, yes, thank you.
Thank you.
I just started taking lessons.
And now, the moment we've all been waiting for.
Today we turn on the magical Power Crystal, granting our fair city the ability to fly high above the clouds.
[giggling.]
And none of this would be possible without our master engineer, genius inventor, and my best friend, Irving.
[cheers and applause.]
- Are you ready to do this, good chum? - You bet, buddy.
Crowd: Three, two, one.
[triumphant music.]
[horns tooting.]
Wow.
[music.]
- Yes! - Whoo-hoo! - We did it, buddy.
- Now, what do you say we get a couple of ice cream floats to celebrate our float-ing city? [chuckling.]
[laughing.]
This guy.
[gears grinding.]
What's happening? [people shouting.]
My gears! Hey, wait a second.
Oh, there's a gear missing! [gears jamming.]
I must have made some kind of miscalculation.
I can fix this.
[people screaming.]
- Irving, what do we do? - I'm not sure.
[metal clanking.]
What's that? [metal clanking.]
[humming.]
Huh? [screaming.]
Almost.
Hmm.
Nope.
[both screaming and smooching.]
[both screaming.]
[screaming.]
[metal clanking.]
[dramatic music.]
That should do it.
[metal clangs.]
Phew.
Kid, where did you learn to do that? Oh, it was nothing, really.
I just love gears.
- I love gears.
- I also love gears.
I just had an amazing idea.
Little gear boy, would you like to be my apprentice? I'll teach you everything I know.
That sounds amaze-steam.
[chuckles.]
I love steam puns.
Uh, Irving, what about the ice cream floats? For the floating city.
Do you mind if I take a rain check on those, Moff? I want to take my new apprentice to see my valve collection.
- Would you like that? - Would I! I got all kinds of gears and gadgets Do you have copper? And and [dramatic music.]
[grumbling.]
[instrumental music.]
Boy, it was really cool how that little kid just fixed the city.
Yeah, kids can do anything except vote.
[gears grinding, electricity sparking.]
[people screaming.]
Something is not quite right here.
[yells.]
The whole city's tipping.
Help, help, help, help, help, help.
[yelling.]
Disaster! The crystal which powers our great city has been corrupted.
[crystal shatters.]
- How could this happen? - That's terrible.
So we can't fly? It was that piece of junk stupid gear the boy used.
It blew everything up.
It's going to take me weeks to get a new crystal, all because of your dumb gear, crystal-breaker.
Crystal-breaker? I I swear I I fixed it.
- Boo! - You ruined this city.
There's only one suitable punishment for crystal-breakers.
[chortling.]
As mayor of Steamberg, I hereby find the boy guilty for breaking the priceless Power Crystal and for thinking he's better than everyone else and for tearing apart best friends, and for this, he must face the steam-shot! [metal clanking.]
Uh, someone get the glue gun.
[whimsical music.]
Thank you, Louis.
All right, off you go.
I sentence you to stay out of my life forever.
Please don't do this.
I can fix it.
I I don't want to leave.
Uh, no, no, no.
- And - Wait, please, please.
- Good-bye.
- I'm sorry it didn't work out! [screaming.]
[crowd cheering.]
And now that that's taken care of, how about that root beer float? [upbeat music.]
[sighs.]
Kick it here.
[grunts.]
[air hisses.]
Aw, man.
[distant screaming.]
[screaming.]
[grunts.]
Oh, my gosh, a new ball.
Aw, that's not a ball.
[breathing heavily.]
- Hello? - Oh, hey, you're awake.
I thought you had a nasty bump on your head.
Turns out it was just your whole head.
My name's Dade.
Oh, uh, nice to meet you.
I'm Harvey.
Harvey.
Wow, that's a cool name.
- You seem really cool.
- Thank you, but I'm not.
I'm just a worthless nobody who ruins stuff for other people.
Oh, by golly, that's that's wonderful! That means you'll fit right in around here.
I don't I don't even know where I am.
Harvey, my sweet child, you're right where you belong, here with me in Reject Town.
- Reject Town? - Best town in the world.
In fact, I'll tell you about it right now by singing.
Here in our town [music.]
Called Reject Town So many wonders to be found And I'd love to share them all with you [coughing.]
'Cause in this magic world Of steampunk We built our town out of steam junk And I just know you're gonna want to live here too See, over there's our playground And that's our public pool Oh, and that's the library.
You know, it doesn't really have any books yet, but that's okay, 'cause none of us know how to read anyway.
Wait, so you're saying everything here - is made out of garbage? - Yep.
All the stuff people throw out That no one wants or cares about Living under trash can lids We're just a bunch of worthless kids - Oh, my gosh.
- Ah, you get used to it.
Everyone does.
Say, let's go meet some of the other rejects.
They can tell you all about how great it is here.
Oh, boy, oh, boy.
This is gonna be fun.
This is my life in Reject Town I sleep outside and on the ground On a bed of broken glass and nails 'Cause things are tough when you're rejected But it's the life that I've accepted Why should I try for more? I'd only fail I'm always getting stung by bees I burn my toys so I don't freeze All: # And everyone's infected with disease # Welcome to my flower garden Watered with the tears I cry Whenever I feel hopeless And I feel hopeless almost all the time.
Uh, I think these flowers are actually dead.
- They are? - Shh, shh.
They're fine.
It's fine.
- Okay, thank you, Piri Piri.
- It was nice to meet you.
See? What'd I tell you, huh? I just know you're gonna like it here, and everybody's gonna like you.
I mean, 'cause I sure do like you.
Come on, everyone.
Let's bring it home now for my new pal Harvey.
All: # Here in our town called Reject Town # The air we breathe is grayish brown Our days are short, our nights are sad and long Yeah, it's the life we have to live 'Cause we've got no alternative Our reject town is where we all belong And now it's time for us to end this song [crashing.]
[gasping.]
So what do you say, buddy? You ready to move in? - Oh, goodness, no.
- What? You You hated our song, didn't you? Oh, my gosh, I told you people to watch your pitch, ya bunch of hacks! No, no, no, no, no.
The song was fine.
It's just that guys, just because you're kids doesn't mean that you have to live in garbage.
You deserve better.
- We do? - Yeah.
I know a wonderful place covered in gears, where you can eat regular food and sleep in regular beds, - and the streets are paved - With gold? No, but they're paved.
It's called Steamberg.
[all speaking at once.]
It sounds amazing.
Oh, except I just remembered.
I got kicked out.
I messed up, and I broke a really important crystal, but maybe if we find another one, we could all go live in Steamberg together.
[all speaking at once.]
But how are we supposed to find a magic crystal? I don't think we have crystals around here.
All we have is tetanus.
Oh, well, looks like you're just gonna have to stay here forever.
You can live with me.
- What about Randl's shop? - Shut up! Yeah, let's go to Randl's.
[wacky music.]
Crystals? I don't think we have any You boys want to see a crystal? My son here got me a real nice crystal.
Look at this right here.
Ma, how many times do I have to tell you? That's just candy.
I watched you steal it out of a vending machine.
Ooh, it's a juicy one, children.
- Unbelievable.
- You're unbelievable! Okay.
So you don't have any Power Crystals? The only place to get one of those is at the Crystal Cavern of Madness, Majesty, and Chaos Supreme Mountain.
Oh, cool.
Well, I guess we better hit the road.
Not so fast.
You got to have an airship before you can even dream of reaching that place.
Cool.
Do you got an airship? - No.
- Both: Aww.
But I'll tell you where you can get one, for a price.
I don't have any money.
I like your hat.
[music.]
Harvey, be careful in here.
Everyone is hopped up on pop and pretzels.
Excuse me.
Can anyone help me? I'm looking for the sky captain.
[all gasp.]
[whispering.]
In the back.
[music.]
[crying.]
I told you, I wanted the crust cut off my grilled cheese sandwich.
What are you looking at, bighead? [music.]
- So I hear you're a pretty good pilot.
- I'm the best there is, kid.
I did the Steamell run in 12 parsteams.
- Oh, yeah? Prove it.
- 'Kay.
[imitating airplane sounds.]
Ooh, she is really good.
Harvey, I don't like the looks of these two.
[growling.]
They seem cool, and they're gonna fly us to the cavern totally free.
Whoa, hold on there, buddy.
Our services ain't free.
- They have a fee.
- Yeah, a fee.
What Fee said.
But I don't have anything.
Okay, then I guess we'll just be on our way.
Sorry to have wasted your time.
See you never again.
Wait, I do have something: the most precious thing in the whole universe.
Empanadas? Oh, those are pretty good, but, no.
I'm talkin' 'bout friendship.
What's a friendship? Friendship is something that supports you, can carry you forever, and never ever gives up on you, runs around, or deserts you.
That sounds like an impressive ship, and you say we can have it forever? It's all yours, if you want it.
Can it carry a lot of people? Or even empanadas? Friendship can do anything.
Both: Whoa.
You've got yourself a deal.
- Yeah! - Ugh, nuts.
[glasses clink.]
Both: To friendship.
Whoa.
This thing is great.
Stuff with faces is, like, the best stuff.
All right.
We got a lot of flying ahead of us, so let's move on out.
I hope you have barf bags, 'cause sometimes I get seasick and airsick and ground-sick.
[murmured chittering.]
I better let the boss know about this.
So, Irving, how about we catch a matinee? Or a matin-B or a matin-C? Any of the matins.
They're all great.
Sounds good, buddy, but I'm still trying to fix this doohickey.
[phone ringing.]
Oh, excuse me.
Hello? They did what? [stammering.]
Excuse me, Irving.
I got to go to the, uh, butt doctor for my, you know for my butt.
[music.]
[groaning.]
Oh, that boy thinks he can come back here and take my friend? [grunts.]
[bombastic music.]
Fly, my Fredd Bots.
Fly! Oh, I'm slipping.
Guys, I have a really good feeling that nothing is gonna stop us.
I'm going to stop him! [cackling.]