Mr Pickles (2013) s02e05 Episode Script
Fish?
1 [Bird squawking.]
[Grunting.]
[Yelps.]
[Barking.]
No! No!! [Barking continues.]
[Grunts.]
Come on.
Come on.
Come on! [Engine sputtering.]
[Groaning.]
[Gasps.]
Um, stealing cars is illegal.
Guess I'll have to put you in jail.
[Whines.]
Mr.
Pickles Good boy Nice dog People's best friend Die! Pickles Tommy: Mr.
Pickles! Here he comes for you Tommy: There you are! Good boy! S02E05 Fish? Sheriff: And then I said, "Stealing cars is illegal.
" And he looked real scared of me.
[Humming.]
Here you go, Mr.
BoJenkins.
Looks good.
Real good.
[Giggles.]
Hey, I'm just about to get off.
Maybe I can help you with that.
[Giggles.]
What do you say we go for a ride? [Giggles.]
[Laughs.]
You're bad.
Huh? Salutations, stranger.
You must be new around here.
New here, huh? Huh? Well, Mr.
BoJenkins is the coolest guy in town.
All the ladies love him.
- Oh, Sheriff - He smells good, too.
Sheriff.
What are you doing? I'm getting her interested in you.
Oh, I'm interested.
[Both laugh.]
Right.
- Tell me everything about you.
- Huh? Uh I'm the sheriff.
Oh, that is so hot! Is it hot in here? Very hot in here.
- Sheriff! - What? She was trying to go for your key Uh, what do you say we go somewhere a little more private? That sounds like a swell idea.
Hmm.
Something ain't right here.
All right.
I'm ready for that ride.
Keep it percolatin' a little while, baby.
- Shweeeee! - I got to go see my friend Blade, get some intel on this sneaky-deaky.
Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! [Growling.]
[Snarls.]
Afternoon.
I'm looking for Blade.
Lewis! [Whirring.]
[Synthesized voice.]
I told you, Grandma, to call me Blade.
Fish? Uh no, thanks.
So, here to get your ass kicked in chess, BoJenkins? [Burps.]
Not today, Blade.
I need some intel on a shady lady.
Follow me into my intelligence command center.
- Fish? - No, thanks.
[Meows.]
Move it, cat.
[Yowls.]
First, I'll need a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a description.
[Burps.]
Well, she's brunet with a tattoo of a rose on her chest, about 5'9", 32 double-D.
One breast's about 1.
2 grams heavier than the other.
- [Computer dings.]
Lisa Gabagoolie.
- Huh.
Daughter of missing mafia boss Jon Gabagoolie, who resurfaced this morning in the Old Town jail.
So she's using Sheriff to break her daddy out of jail.
I got to go warn him! Fish? [Meows.]
Cat get away from my fi-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-sh.
Well, this is my home.
We can have some marshmallows, chips, raw hot dogs, and jelly.
Or we could go upstairs.
What for? [Chuckles.]
[Moans.]
Ohhhhh! So you want to eat hot dogs in bed? Huh? Sheriff? You have a guest? Hi, Mama.
Hi.
I'm Sheriff's girlfriend.
Both: Girlfriend?! What do you say we go somewhere we can have [Whispers.]
sex? [Gasps.]
- Bye, Mama.
- Whoa! [Tires squealing.]
Shweeeee! Hmm! - Hyah! Hyah! - Hey, Mr.
B.
My twin sister thought we should make this a threesome.
[Both moaning.]
All rig Ladies, uh, hold on just a little bit longer.
Hyah! Hyah! Both: Hmph! - Stop, Sheriff! - What? - She's only using you.
- What? - He's just jealous.
- What? Shut up, bitch! Hey, don't tell my bitch to shut up! She's only using you to break her daddy out of jail.
Assault! Arrest him, Sheriff! No, no.
I'm serious.
Back off of my girlfriend.
- Damn it! Listen to me! - No! You made me do this! [Imitating siren.]
Sheriff, listen to me! Yeah, yeah.
In you go.
Just be for tonight.
Hi! Sheriff, don't you lock me in this cell! I'll be right back.
Just got to finish up some paperwork.
- Daddy! - What's taking so long with the keys? Jon Gabagoolie.
What are they talking about? I saw a talking deer once! Yeah, yeah.
Daddy, where have you been? Last year, we finally found out the whereabouts of that rat Vito Pizzareli.
Turns out the Witness Protection Program had turned him into a Bigfoot and set him free in Old Town.
But by the time we got here, he had befriended some kid and his dog.
Then that dog killed all the other bosses with machine guns.
Then he made me a prisoner down under his dog house.
- Then - Stop! Have you started drinking again? Sheriff: Bye-bye.
[Toilet flushes.]
Whew! All done with that paperwork.
Shall we? Sheriff, get me out of here! Wish me luck.
Ohh! Whiskey? Thanks.
I could use one.
What? Pass me a drink.
Okay.
No! - Don't give this scumbag any! - What?! I could have you taken care of for disrespecting me that way.
Where I come from, you would get a special delivery.
That is where we chop your face off down to the chin so it falls open like a mailbox.
Then we stick a gun in your mouth and send you a message.
Well, where I'm from, there's something called a flip-and-smash.
Oh, yeah? What's that? That's where the sheriff has sex with your daughter.
Oh, yeah! [Laughs.]
[Grumbles.]
Yay! We're gonna have sex! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Okay! Calm down! Wait a minute.
What if you were using me? You better prove you're not by giving me a kiss? Okay.
One kiss.
I'm in love! Oh.
Oh, okay.
All right, all right! That's enough! Num! Ah! Look! A bed! And a lamp! Ohh! And a bubble-top tub! Now, give me those clothes, and I'll be right behind you.
Okay.
Uh You want me to take your clothes off? Uh-huh.
[Groans.]
Sweet! Yay! [Sultry music plays.]
It's so sexy in here.
[Chuckles.]
I can't wait to rub our underwear parts together.
[Panting.]
I got 'em, Daddy! - Hey, what's that on your face? - Uh, it's nothing.
[Harmonica plays.]
Huh? Looks like Sheriff gave her the old flip-and-smash.
[Harmonica plays.]
[Grumbles.]
What? Classic Sheriff.
[Harmonica plays.]
Oh! That's it! I'm gonna kill that sheriff! - What? Daddy, no! - Huh? - Uh-oh.
- Oh! Daddy, we have to go! Wait.
Give me your gun.
What? Why? [Growling.]
I'm gonna kill that dog first.
[Snarling.]
There you are, Mr.
Pickles! Mnh? Look what I did with the free hair from the barbershop! [Car doors close.]
Mnh? [Tires squeal.]
[Laughs.]
[Whimpers.]
Damn! I think I just got Sheriff killed.
Oh, well.
But I'm strong.
Real strong! - I'm powerful! - So much power! [Straining.]
These bars ain't nothing! You're You're You're bending the bars! Ohh! New plan.
[Grunts.]
Hey! Emergency lube.
I'll squeeze through the bars.
[Grunting.]
Ohh! I guess Sheriff is a dead man.
Blade: Fish? Blade?! I saw you on the security-y-y-y-y-y-y Huh? Y-y-y-y-y camera.
Fish? - No, thanks.
- Hi, elephant! Get off of me, man! [Chuckling.]
Hi.
- There you are! - Huh? My other twins thought we should make this a fivesome.
- Oh, I'll be right back! - Huh? Fish? - Daddy, wait! - I'm gonna kill that damn sheriff! Daddy, please! Is that you, girlfriend? I can't hear very well over the sensual music.
- Girlfriend?! - Daddy, stop! So you do have feelings for him.
No! We should just be careful, keep things quiet.
Aha! [Chuckles.]
[Chuckles.]
[Harmonica plays.]
Huh? Fish? - Huh? - Huh? - Blam! - Oh! [Sheriff vocalizing.]
[Growls.]
- Hyah! - Unh! Ohh! There you are, girlfriend.
That's okay.
True love waits.
[Growls.]
Ohh! Hya Hyah! You're not the only one familiar with karate, BoJenkins-san.
[Electronic music plays.]
[Harmonica plays.]
[Electronic music continues.]
[Growls.]
[Grunts.]
Hyyyy Yahhhh! [Grunts.]
Unh! Unh! Unh! Sheriff: Yeah, yeah, sittin' in the tub Waitin' for my girlfriend so we can make lub Ah! W-W Uh Come on, now! L-Let's talk about this! Let's give him the special delivery.
[Laughs evilly.]
[Shotgun cocks.]
[All gasp.]
Mnh-mnh! Drop it! Girlfriend! I got soap in my eyes! Owey-kazowey! It burns! Huh? Huh? [Tires squeal.]
[Both panting.]
Damn! They got away! - Blade: Oh.
Yes.
- Oh, my! [Girls moaning.]
Huh? I am enjoying this sex very much.
Oh, Blade! - Fish? Oh.
Yes.
- Woman: Oh, choke me with that fish! Don't stop.
Right there.
- Hmmmmm? - Hmmmmm? [Screams.]
Whoo! Whoo! Ooh! You one bad mama, Mama! [Chuckles.]
Sheriff: Mama! [Both gasp.]
My girlfriend left me with a broken heart! There, there, Sheriff.
There are plenty of fish in the sea.
Oh! I never heard that before.
- Go to sleep, little Sheriff - Sheriff Oh, the bird had a baby Ah.
Finally getting out of this friggin' town! - Aah! Huh? - Huh? [Tires screech.]
It's just a dog, Daddy.
[Engine revs.]
[Growls.]
What are you doing?! I'm gonna kill that dog! [Tires squeal.]
- [Thud.]
Aah! - Ah! Now to make sure he's dead.
Huh?! What the he Oh! No! No!! Daddy, no! Don't kill me! [Screaming, sobbing.]
[Mutters.]
[Barks.]
[Grunting.]
[Yelps.]
[Barking.]
No! No!! [Barking continues.]
[Grunts.]
Come on.
Come on.
Come on! [Engine sputtering.]
[Groaning.]
[Gasps.]
Um, stealing cars is illegal.
Guess I'll have to put you in jail.
[Whines.]
Mr.
Pickles Good boy Nice dog People's best friend Die! Pickles Tommy: Mr.
Pickles! Here he comes for you Tommy: There you are! Good boy! S02E05 Fish? Sheriff: And then I said, "Stealing cars is illegal.
" And he looked real scared of me.
[Humming.]
Here you go, Mr.
BoJenkins.
Looks good.
Real good.
[Giggles.]
Hey, I'm just about to get off.
Maybe I can help you with that.
[Giggles.]
What do you say we go for a ride? [Giggles.]
[Laughs.]
You're bad.
Huh? Salutations, stranger.
You must be new around here.
New here, huh? Huh? Well, Mr.
BoJenkins is the coolest guy in town.
All the ladies love him.
- Oh, Sheriff - He smells good, too.
Sheriff.
What are you doing? I'm getting her interested in you.
Oh, I'm interested.
[Both laugh.]
Right.
- Tell me everything about you.
- Huh? Uh I'm the sheriff.
Oh, that is so hot! Is it hot in here? Very hot in here.
- Sheriff! - What? She was trying to go for your key Uh, what do you say we go somewhere a little more private? That sounds like a swell idea.
Hmm.
Something ain't right here.
All right.
I'm ready for that ride.
Keep it percolatin' a little while, baby.
- Shweeeee! - I got to go see my friend Blade, get some intel on this sneaky-deaky.
Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! [Growling.]
[Snarls.]
Afternoon.
I'm looking for Blade.
Lewis! [Whirring.]
[Synthesized voice.]
I told you, Grandma, to call me Blade.
Fish? Uh no, thanks.
So, here to get your ass kicked in chess, BoJenkins? [Burps.]
Not today, Blade.
I need some intel on a shady lady.
Follow me into my intelligence command center.
- Fish? - No, thanks.
[Meows.]
Move it, cat.
[Yowls.]
First, I'll need a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a description.
[Burps.]
Well, she's brunet with a tattoo of a rose on her chest, about 5'9", 32 double-D.
One breast's about 1.
2 grams heavier than the other.
- [Computer dings.]
Lisa Gabagoolie.
- Huh.
Daughter of missing mafia boss Jon Gabagoolie, who resurfaced this morning in the Old Town jail.
So she's using Sheriff to break her daddy out of jail.
I got to go warn him! Fish? [Meows.]
Cat get away from my fi-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-sh.
Well, this is my home.
We can have some marshmallows, chips, raw hot dogs, and jelly.
Or we could go upstairs.
What for? [Chuckles.]
[Moans.]
Ohhhhh! So you want to eat hot dogs in bed? Huh? Sheriff? You have a guest? Hi, Mama.
Hi.
I'm Sheriff's girlfriend.
Both: Girlfriend?! What do you say we go somewhere we can have [Whispers.]
sex? [Gasps.]
- Bye, Mama.
- Whoa! [Tires squealing.]
Shweeeee! Hmm! - Hyah! Hyah! - Hey, Mr.
B.
My twin sister thought we should make this a threesome.
[Both moaning.]
All rig Ladies, uh, hold on just a little bit longer.
Hyah! Hyah! Both: Hmph! - Stop, Sheriff! - What? - She's only using you.
- What? - He's just jealous.
- What? Shut up, bitch! Hey, don't tell my bitch to shut up! She's only using you to break her daddy out of jail.
Assault! Arrest him, Sheriff! No, no.
I'm serious.
Back off of my girlfriend.
- Damn it! Listen to me! - No! You made me do this! [Imitating siren.]
Sheriff, listen to me! Yeah, yeah.
In you go.
Just be for tonight.
Hi! Sheriff, don't you lock me in this cell! I'll be right back.
Just got to finish up some paperwork.
- Daddy! - What's taking so long with the keys? Jon Gabagoolie.
What are they talking about? I saw a talking deer once! Yeah, yeah.
Daddy, where have you been? Last year, we finally found out the whereabouts of that rat Vito Pizzareli.
Turns out the Witness Protection Program had turned him into a Bigfoot and set him free in Old Town.
But by the time we got here, he had befriended some kid and his dog.
Then that dog killed all the other bosses with machine guns.
Then he made me a prisoner down under his dog house.
- Then - Stop! Have you started drinking again? Sheriff: Bye-bye.
[Toilet flushes.]
Whew! All done with that paperwork.
Shall we? Sheriff, get me out of here! Wish me luck.
Ohh! Whiskey? Thanks.
I could use one.
What? Pass me a drink.
Okay.
No! - Don't give this scumbag any! - What?! I could have you taken care of for disrespecting me that way.
Where I come from, you would get a special delivery.
That is where we chop your face off down to the chin so it falls open like a mailbox.
Then we stick a gun in your mouth and send you a message.
Well, where I'm from, there's something called a flip-and-smash.
Oh, yeah? What's that? That's where the sheriff has sex with your daughter.
Oh, yeah! [Laughs.]
[Grumbles.]
Yay! We're gonna have sex! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Okay! Calm down! Wait a minute.
What if you were using me? You better prove you're not by giving me a kiss? Okay.
One kiss.
I'm in love! Oh.
Oh, okay.
All right, all right! That's enough! Num! Ah! Look! A bed! And a lamp! Ohh! And a bubble-top tub! Now, give me those clothes, and I'll be right behind you.
Okay.
Uh You want me to take your clothes off? Uh-huh.
[Groans.]
Sweet! Yay! [Sultry music plays.]
It's so sexy in here.
[Chuckles.]
I can't wait to rub our underwear parts together.
[Panting.]
I got 'em, Daddy! - Hey, what's that on your face? - Uh, it's nothing.
[Harmonica plays.]
Huh? Looks like Sheriff gave her the old flip-and-smash.
[Harmonica plays.]
[Grumbles.]
What? Classic Sheriff.
[Harmonica plays.]
Oh! That's it! I'm gonna kill that sheriff! - What? Daddy, no! - Huh? - Uh-oh.
- Oh! Daddy, we have to go! Wait.
Give me your gun.
What? Why? [Growling.]
I'm gonna kill that dog first.
[Snarling.]
There you are, Mr.
Pickles! Mnh? Look what I did with the free hair from the barbershop! [Car doors close.]
Mnh? [Tires squeal.]
[Laughs.]
[Whimpers.]
Damn! I think I just got Sheriff killed.
Oh, well.
But I'm strong.
Real strong! - I'm powerful! - So much power! [Straining.]
These bars ain't nothing! You're You're You're bending the bars! Ohh! New plan.
[Grunts.]
Hey! Emergency lube.
I'll squeeze through the bars.
[Grunting.]
Ohh! I guess Sheriff is a dead man.
Blade: Fish? Blade?! I saw you on the security-y-y-y-y-y-y Huh? Y-y-y-y-y camera.
Fish? - No, thanks.
- Hi, elephant! Get off of me, man! [Chuckling.]
Hi.
- There you are! - Huh? My other twins thought we should make this a fivesome.
- Oh, I'll be right back! - Huh? Fish? - Daddy, wait! - I'm gonna kill that damn sheriff! Daddy, please! Is that you, girlfriend? I can't hear very well over the sensual music.
- Girlfriend?! - Daddy, stop! So you do have feelings for him.
No! We should just be careful, keep things quiet.
Aha! [Chuckles.]
[Chuckles.]
[Harmonica plays.]
Huh? Fish? - Huh? - Huh? - Blam! - Oh! [Sheriff vocalizing.]
[Growls.]
- Hyah! - Unh! Ohh! There you are, girlfriend.
That's okay.
True love waits.
[Growls.]
Ohh! Hya Hyah! You're not the only one familiar with karate, BoJenkins-san.
[Electronic music plays.]
[Harmonica plays.]
[Electronic music continues.]
[Growls.]
[Grunts.]
Hyyyy Yahhhh! [Grunts.]
Unh! Unh! Unh! Sheriff: Yeah, yeah, sittin' in the tub Waitin' for my girlfriend so we can make lub Ah! W-W Uh Come on, now! L-Let's talk about this! Let's give him the special delivery.
[Laughs evilly.]
[Shotgun cocks.]
[All gasp.]
Mnh-mnh! Drop it! Girlfriend! I got soap in my eyes! Owey-kazowey! It burns! Huh? Huh? [Tires squeal.]
[Both panting.]
Damn! They got away! - Blade: Oh.
Yes.
- Oh, my! [Girls moaning.]
Huh? I am enjoying this sex very much.
Oh, Blade! - Fish? Oh.
Yes.
- Woman: Oh, choke me with that fish! Don't stop.
Right there.
- Hmmmmm? - Hmmmmm? [Screams.]
Whoo! Whoo! Ooh! You one bad mama, Mama! [Chuckles.]
Sheriff: Mama! [Both gasp.]
My girlfriend left me with a broken heart! There, there, Sheriff.
There are plenty of fish in the sea.
Oh! I never heard that before.
- Go to sleep, little Sheriff - Sheriff Oh, the bird had a baby Ah.
Finally getting out of this friggin' town! - Aah! Huh? - Huh? [Tires screech.]
It's just a dog, Daddy.
[Engine revs.]
[Growls.]
What are you doing?! I'm gonna kill that dog! [Tires squeal.]
- [Thud.]
Aah! - Ah! Now to make sure he's dead.
Huh?! What the he Oh! No! No!! Daddy, no! Don't kill me! [Screaming, sobbing.]
[Mutters.]
[Barks.]