The A-Team (1983) s02e05 Episode Script
When You Comin' Back, Range Rider?
NARRATOR: In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a miIitary court for a crime they didn't commit.
These men promptIy escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los AngeIes underground.
Today, stiII wanted by the government, they survive as soIdiers of fortune.
If you have a probIem, if no one eIse can heIp and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the A-Team.
[Theme music.]
[Peaceful instrumental music.]
[Gun firing.]
[Neighing fearfully.]
[Racy instrumental music.]
All right, head them up over there.
This load of glue ain't getting away.
Get them! lt's that crazy lndian! [Gun firing.]
[Racy instrumental music continues.]
[Gunfire continues.]
-Stay on him.
-That lndian's nuts, Stryker.
He's also gonna be dead.
[Gun firing.]
Get closer.
[Horse neighing fearfully.]
Chief, you're gonna be real sorry.
STRYKER: Bus? -Carter.
-This is Stryker.
Herd got away.
You radioed before you was chasing them into the valley.
-How'd they get out? -lt was that lndian again.
-You let him get away again, too? -No, sir.
Not this time.
You send him back to his reservation in a basket, you hear? These men have been wanted for over 10 years.
lt's time that we closed the file.
The case has been back burner for years, General.
lt's common knowledge Col.
Lynch has been waging his own ridiculous little vendetta.
Precisely why Col.
Lynch is now out and this matter is hanging fire.
These three soldiers were tried and convicted because of extreme political pressure at the time.
Which is something that you should understand.
Yes, sir.
They were practically forgotten about within a couple of years of their escape.
But Lynch keeps throwing balls down their alley and now he's mushroomed this whole thing into what's considered to be a highly embarrassing series of situations.
Look at that.
December 3, '77, they relieved Col.
Lynch of one executive jet belonging to the military.
[Military instrumental music.]
Who is that? That? That's nothing.
File it under old business.
[Siren wailing.]
[Thrilling instrumental music.]
DECKER: Two months Iater, he Iost five MP cars in a high speed pursuit.
[Sirens continue wailing.]
Hang on, kid.
[Motorbike engine revving.]
We should be meeting B.
A.
any minute.
FACE: Look out, Hannibal! For which we had to make restitution to shopkeepers whose storefronts were destroyed by Lynch's actions.
And then, last year after the newspaper headlines said they'd captured the Team they escaped from a full security military installation.
DECKER: Taking with them a miIitary troop pIane under Lynch's command.
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
HANNlBAL: Go, Murdock! You know, all in all they've made a fine bunch of jackasses out of all of us and l want it to stop now.
GENERAL: l want you to bring the A-Team in.
GENERAL: You were the best troubleshooter the past two wars.
Until extreme political pressures knocked the hat off my career and any possibility of furthering my rank.
lt seems the very methods that made me an embarrassment and shuffled me off to the side are the exact reasons l'm being considered the best man for this job.
GENERAL: l'm not saying-- DECKER: We know what you're saying so let's don't dance around the floor once.
Everybody heard the reports from 'Nam on these guys.
They were the best.
Because they're fast, sharp and unorthodox.
DECKER: The way to catch men like this is to play by their rules.
Which means there are none.
What l'm interested in, Colonel, is results.
l don't expect detailed reports on the whats, hows or whens of their apprehension.
l just want to know that it's done.
GENERAL: You erase the blot from our records and l'll be very pleased.
GENERAL: Which means that others will be very pleased.
Do what you have to do.
Get me the A-Team.
Yes, sir.
-Morning.
-Yeah, morning.
Are you the only hot dog vendor here in the park? Do you see any other hot dog vendors? -No.
-Well, you won't.
l got a contract with the city.
Could l have a hot dog, please? You kidding? You mean a lukewarm dog.
-l just fired her up.
-Well, that's fine, whatever.
There's a coffee shop across the street, got hot food, got good breakfast rolls, too.
No.
l'd like a hot dog.
[Muttering.]
l never heard of anybody eating hot dogs at 1 1 :00.
DANlEL: What? HANNlBAL: l said l never heard of anybody eating hot dogs at 1 1 :00.
Then why do you open up at 1 1 :00? HANNlBAL: l don't open up, son.
HANNlBAL: l fire up at 1 1 :00.
The dogs are ready by noon.
Then l'm ready for the lunch crowd.
l work from noon to 4:00.
l've been doing that for about 28 years.
l'm a well established firm around here.
Well, that's great.
Then maybe you know Mr.
Lee.
HANNlBAL: Who? DANlEL: Mr.
Lee.
DANlEL: He owns the Chinese laundry up over on Sixth Street.
-A Chinaman? -Yes.
Never heard of him.
He told me to come on down here to buy a hot dog.
l wish he'd told me.
'Cause l'd have told him to tell you not to come till noon.
See, l fire up at 1 1 :00, but the dogs aren't ready till noon.
l guess you don't know.
Sorry l bothered you.
You forgot your dog.
-That's okay-- -No.
l can't take it back.
lt's a health law.
And we don't want to throw it away.
There are people out there starving who would just love a cold hot dog.
-l guess you're right.
-That's 75 cents.
-Keep the change.
-Thank you very much.
[Mysterious instrumental music.]
Here you go, B.
A.
No mustard.
Hannibal, how many more of these cold hot dogs l got to eat? l'll save this one.
[Hannibal sighing.]
l had to have them for props.
You don't want me to waste good money, do you? That dude definitely wasn't being followed.
So if he's a birddog for the military, he ain't got no backup.
Yeah, l haven't seen any MPs.
My conversation with him as Mr.
Lee, l'd say he's a good man with a real problem.
We gotta help him.
l'll get Amy, you go spring Murdock and get Face.
l don't know where Face is.
Been trying to reach him since yesterday.
l'm telling you, Boobie, we shoot all three pictures at once.
That way we get the two sequels in the can while we're shooting the first one.
-And if the first one opens big-- -l hear you, Mick.
But, believe me, we're talking major box office business here.
Gretel, babe, you've met the Mick, haven't you? l'm real happy the Jer could fly you over for the premiere.
[Gretel speaking in German.]
lt's going to be a big night.
Everyone who's anyone is here.
The screening is scheduled to start in 15 minutes, Colonel.
Let's get ready to move.
He'll have too much advantage in a darkened theatre.
Are the men inside ready? -Yes, sir.
-Let's do it.
FACE: first eight or nine weeks, $30 million.
You take that and reinvest it.
You can get four or five more pictures going.
l talked to a guy at MGM-- WAlTER: Mr.
Johnson, there's a telephone call for you.
For me? Take a message.
WAlTER: You wouldn't want these people to know that you're really Templeton Peck of the A-Team, would you? WAlTER: Follow me.
Excuse me.
Overseas.
Could be that spot in Cannes l was hoping for.
Gretel, babe, keep the Mick company.
FACE: The Jer'll be back in a second.
What a guy.
[Light instrumental music playing.]
WAlTER: Here.
Hannibal, what is this? What's going on? That's my line.
l'm meeting a client tonight in case you'd like to know.
B.
A.
hasn't been able to reach you since yesterday.
He should've left a message at the Beverly Hills office.
l didn't know we had one.
And what is this? FACE: Bad picture.
Look at.
They must've caught me leaving La Serre on Thursday.
You'd think they'd hire a professional photographer -for a front page picture.
-Did you know you've lost your drive wheel? -l mean, what do you think you're doing? -l've decided to produce.
-Miracle Films.
-''lf it's a good film, it's a Miracle.
'' -Catchy, huh? -You're nuts.
Now, who did you scam to spring for this little extravaganza? FACE: No, that's just it, Hannibal.
ln Hollywood, when you get someone else to pay the freight you're not scamming, you're producing.
FACE: There's tons of guys who don't know what to do with their money just dying to get into showbiz.
The glamour, the broads, the parties.
l've waited 20 years for someone to throw a party like this for me.
-How do you do it? -See.
l needed a showpiece, so l scrambled around looking for any piece of junk l could get my hands on.
And l come across this little number for $10,000 made by a couple of film students.
So, l dub it in German then l subtitle it back into English and tell everyone l brought it from overseas.
The critics see that, and right away you're looking down the business end of a good review.
Yeah, but Wine For Breakfast? Yeah, that's just one of the little touches.
You give it a lousy title and tell everyone it doesn't translate well from the original.
FACE: Forget that.
l want you to read a script.
lt's gonna be my first stateside production.
The Beast of the YeIIow Night.
FACE: And guess who'll play the beast of the title role? l'm telling you, by the time l'm done they're gonna put your claw prints out front in the cement.
And they're gonna put you behind bars.
FACE: Come on, Hannibal you don't think Col.
Lynch reads the film business trades, do you? HANNlBAL: Face-- FACE: No, relax.
Why don't you come on up and meet some of the guys? l have to meet a client.
l already ran him by Mr.
Lee and the hot dog vendor and l'm gonna snap him up and take the case.
HANNlBAL: l came to tell you to meet B.
A.
at the hospital and spring Murdock.
Amy's gonna meet us at the warehouse.
FACE: No, not tonight.
HANNlBAL: lt must be tonight.
FACE: l got a few guys l'm gonna turn for a few million.
l can't just douse the house lights and give them a box of popcorn to remember me by.
-What? -You're not George Lucas.
No, you're not.
Now we need the job.
This guy, Daniel Running Bear, needs our help.
Go get Murdock.
And keep your head down.
l've got a feeling Lynch is outside this minute.
Military police! Everybody down! [All screaming.]
Give it up, Peck! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
-You'll call me? -Yeah, the first chance l get.
[Women screaming.]
Hurry up, get after him! The one who catches him keeps his rank.
HANNlBAL: Mr.
Johnson's looking for you.
l've been right here.
Well, you should be back there.
There's a real fender bender in the lot.
[Fast-paced instrumental music continues.]
[Sirens wailing.]
Somebody ought to tell this guy.
He's got a shimmy at 85.
[Car horns honking.]
You want me to get that? l'm fine.
Hang on.
They'll never catch us.
Who in the world is this guy? lt sure isn't Lynch.
l don't know.
But it's gonna be fun finding out.
[Upbeat instrumental music.]
[Sombre instrumental music.]
-l'm sorry.
What? -Nothing.
Wait a minute, you okay? Fine, yeah.
You got a problem? No, l just thought maybe you were hungry.
Here.
My wallet! DANlEL: Wait a minute! COP: You got a problem here? l could have given you a couple of bucks.
No, Officer.
Yeah? Well, let's see some lD.
Yes, sir.
HANNlBAL: Yeah, you both better get in the car.
We'll kick this around.
Do we have to do this, Officer? There's nothing really happening here.
HANNlBAL: Get in the car.
DANlEL: Wait a minute! What about him? HANNlBAL: Get in.
-What's going on here? -Now Daniel Running Bear what are you doing in Los Angeles? l came here to meet some people.
The A-Team? -l'm Hannibal Smith.
-Hannibal Smith? HANNlBAL: Yeah.
DANlEL: This has all been pretty weird.
Yeah, l know.
But it gets slower from here on.
l hope so, because l don't think l could handle another crazy scene.
MURDOCK: And so, the Range Rider defeats the Black Rock gang in another daring shootout.
NARRATOR: [On TV.]
Once again making the pIains safe for aII who dare brave the untamed west.
No matter race nor creed the Range Rider stands for truth and justice for aII.
[Dramatic country music playing on TV.]
MURDOCK: lt's all right, girl.
MURDOCK: l must have been wrong.
MURDOCK: The Black Rock gang has lured us into this cave and then they've pushed a boulder in front of the opening.
MURDOCK: But there has to be another way out.
How about right here through this window? MURDOCK: Lucky you showed up with a flashlight.
MURDOCK: There's a blackout at the building.
That's because B.
A.
is jumping the master circuit so the alarm wouldn't go off.
Murdock, what are you wearing? MURDOCK: l guess my secret's out.
You've discovered my alter ego.
You're not Professor Nutty Butty again, are you? FACE: Rex the Wonder Dog? MURDOCK: No.
lt's just that when you phoned you said we were going up against some horse rustlers.
MURDOCK: Who better to defeat them than the mysterious lawman of the plains the Range Rider.
You got me there.
Now come on, Murdock.
FACE: l told B.
A.
to turn on the juice in about 10 minutes.
FACE: Any longer than that and they'll start a room check.
FACE: Nighty-night, Murdock.
MURDOCK: Thunder, girl.
No, Thunder's not who l think she is? MURDOCK: Whoa, girl.
l don't know, Murdock you know how B.
A.
feels about having Billy in his van, and he's just a dog.
MURDOCK: The Range Rider would sooner face a dozen bandits without his six-shooters than not have Thunder at his side.
MURDOCK: No man is tall enough to come between me and my trusty steed.
MURDOCK: Come, girl.
Sucker, you better not be talking to no invisible animals.
FACE: Here we go again.
B.
A.
: Come on.
[Country music resumes playing on TV.]
-Thanks.
-Sure.
NARRATOR: [On TV.]
Once again, the faithfuI rider of the range is off on another great adventure.
Murdock, in case someone spots us we don't want them to recognise you and blow the alarm.
MURDOCK: Good idea, Kemosabe.
That's B.
A.
Baracus's van.
Yeah, it pulled up while you were inside so l slipped out and attached a homer to it.
CRANE: Good move, Sergeant.
Murdock's still in his room.
l guess they still visit him on occasion.
They were part of the same unit.
Any sign of Smith? Couldn't see, too dark.
But l figured they'd lead us right to the good Colonel.
[Upbeat instrumental music.]
-Anybody follow you? -No, l was real careful.
Col.
Decker, l think we've got the A-Team.
[Greeting in Native American language.]
MURDOCK: You must be Chief Running Bear who has summoned help to save them wild horses from being slaughtered by rustlers.
DANlEL: This keeps getting better.
First you take me off Hollywood Boulevard dressed as a cop and now the Range Rider shows up.
You know the Range Rider? MURDOCK: A full-blooded American lndian living on the open plains of Arizona where the Range Rider dispenses his justice? MURDOCK: Naturally, he's heard of me.
l used to catch the Saturday morning reruns when l was at UCLA.
-Mr.
Running Bear.
-Daniel.
Daniel, there is a federal bureau that watches over wild mustangs.
Yes, but like any other branch of the government too much to govern, too few people to do it.
There are thousands of wild horses spread over the United States.
And every one of them is protected by law.
Yes.
But when someone like Bus Carter breaks the law it's very hard to press charges.
The largest land-owner.
And his standing with the local Cattlemen's Association makes him a very influential man in the county.
He also plays dirty.
To be perfectly honest with you l've had most of my wardrobe made for the year and l don't have anything to go with one of those.
So l'm afraid l'll have to return this money you gave us.
Face.
Look, l'm sorry l didn't tell Mr.
Lee l didn't have enough to cover your fee.
HANNlBAL: No, you're not.
You're right.
l had to meet you to convince you how important this really is.
We've had it happen to us before, haven't we, Amy? l don't think it ever hurts to listen to anyone's troubles.
We're always working for chump change.
This time, we're trying to save a bunch of horses.
But these horses have been there for as long as my people can remember.
They're a part of the land, a part of my tribe.
Surely you can appreciate the importance of one's heritage and traditions.
l will raise the money eventually.
Look, all l ask is that you come down and take a look.
DANlEL: See for yourselves.
lf that doesn't convince you then l understand.
l guess anybody who's crazy enough to take on three jeeploads of armed rustlers on horseback by himself, deserves special consideration.
We're still working for almost nothing again.
MURDOCK: Once again the mysterious Range Rider sets out on another thrilling adventure with his trusty steed, Thunder, who.
Who will remain behind just this one time.
Well, guys, shall we saddle up? [Gunfire.]
DECKER: This is CoI.
Decker of the U.
S.
Army.
You are compIeteIy surrounded.
No kidding? Col.
Decker, did you hear that? You know this guy? Everyone in Vietnam knew him.
He always got the job done under any circumstances and he never lost any sleep over how he did it.
Yeah, Hannibal and this guy mixed it up once in the DOOM Club.
The DOOM Club? The Da Nang Officers' Open Mess.
You didn't like the way he sugared his coffee? No.
l didn't like the way he blew up Cong hospitals like a favourite sport.
Give yourseIf up or I'II fIush the whoIe buiIding and everyone inside right in the sewer.
-ls he kidding? -Sounds like he's crazy! -Decker is crazy.
-Maybe l should go out and talk to him.
You want me to start bIasting, Smith? -Well, Hannibal? -l'm thinking.
[Gunfire continues.]
Think faster, man! Hey, Decker, this is Smith.
You ought to cool out.
What if we have an innocent person in here? Who might that be? Amy AIIen? I'd hardIy caII her innocent.
Okay, look-- No taIk.
You come out or we come in.
And you're not gonna Iike it if we come in.
I'm giving you two minutes.
Don't you love it? No matter how smart they think they are, they always screw up somehow.
HANNlBAL: Let's get the weapons out of the van.
What are we gonna do in two minutes? You heard the man.
We're going out the front door.
lt's obvious they really have no choice.
With anyone but Col.
Hannibal Smith.
With him, nothing is obvious.
What can he do? We'll find out in about 40 seconds.
[Thrilling instrumental music.]
Looks like you stopped the A-Team once and for all.
-What about Hannibal? -He'll be all right.
MP 1 : Get those civilians back! Keep them out of the way! All right, show's over.
Go back to work.
Come on, move along.
HANNlBAL: Hey, you got a light, pal? MP 2: Sure.
MP 2: Keep them.
HANNlBAL: Thanks, pal.
[Victorious instrumental music.]
FACE: Beautiful Arizona.
Quiet, serene, the comatose state.
You ought to scout locations for your next movie here.
That career sure went fast.
Talk about the sizzle and fizzle of Hollywood.
Move over, man.
Give me room.
FACE: Will you take it easy? You're gonna break my rib.
This fool won't gimme no room! l didn't design this thing.
Besides, there ain't enough room for four of us.
Four of us.
What do you mean? Three of us, sucker! You got that? B.
A.
: You hear me, sucker? There's three of us.
No animal, no nothing.
Got it? Say three or he's gonna bounce you down the hyphenated line.
Okay, three! AMY: Will you guys knock it off? On my reporter's salary, l can't afford to buy a new car every time you guys get together in it.
lt's a long ride, and this is not the most comfortable car.
l'm comfortable.
We wouldn't be going through this, if you didn't leave my van behind! -You said you was gonna lose those MPs.
-l did.
But you didn't bring my van back.
l worked hard on them wheels, Hannibal.
l'm sure it'll turn up sooner or later.
[Crane chugging.]
lt's empty.
We can drag the bay.
Don't waste the energy.
All of the bodies couldn't have washed out.
How did he do it? DECKER: He's Hannibal Smith.
That's how he does it.
lt would have been easy for him to jump clear of the van before it hit the water and then drift off with the rest of this crowd.
For a while, l thought this was gonna be easy.
Anything on those prints we found at the warehouse, that weren't Smith's? Yeah.
Daniel Running Bear.
We had his prints on file from the military.
He served from '66 to '68, First Air Cav in Vietnam.
Get an address on this Running Bear.
He's a computer programmer in Arizona.
Lives on the Chequea lndian Reservation where he was born.
Let's pay Mr.
Running Bear a little visit find out what his story is.
lt's the easiest way up there.
lt's more comfortable than crowding into my Land Rover.
Man, horses! Don't you just love horses? When l can see them.
[Lilting country song.]
l was out here one night when l first saw Carter's men rounding up the horses.
Where they corral them l have no idea.
But then again, Carter has over 250,000 acres.
He can't sit on those mustangs for long.
You say he ships them by rail? Those railroad tracks that we passed coming out of town? That's his line.
He's got Iocomotives and boxcars which he uses to move out his cattIe.
l'm sure he takes the horses down to a slaughter-house in Mexico which is only a short run from here.
What about your people, brother? How can they let this happen? What about them? They're people just like anybody else.
They make a Iiving, go about their business just Iike any others.
They're not gonna dig out the war paint and saddle up and go against Carter's hacienda.
Besides, the Chequea were never a warring tribe.
They were fishermen who migrated south during the war of 1864.
No kidding? -Heck of a way to fish.
-Let me see that.
Be my guest.
Any more come this way, you can have them, too.
Chequea.
-The Chequea were a-- -What? A warring tribe.
[Screaming.]
DANlEL: Wait! Don't hurt him.
B.
A.
: lt's a kid.
Shelly, it's me! SHELLY: Daniel, l thought you were still in Los Angeles.
l just came back.
This is my nephew, Shelly.
How do you do? l believe this belongs to you.
What's wrong with you, kid? Firing these arrows at people.
Don't you know they're dangerous? They could hurt somebody real bad.
Couldn't you find better toys to play with? Not exactly great for 100%% worsted cotton either, kid.
l don't hit anything unless l want to.
l happen to be county champion.
l was just trying to scare you off.
SHELLY: Thought you were Bus Carter's men.
-They came out here with me to help.
-Yeah? SHELLY: You're gonna help us trash Carter and his men? Trash Carter? Shelly and Daniel Running Bear.
Wonder what Sitting Bull would think.
l don't know how the rest of you feel but l wouldn't sleep well tonight knowing those animals there are gonna wind up as the sticky side of a stamp.
He does it every time.
Does that mean you'll help? You'll stop Carter? -We're gonna try.
-That means we will.
Whenever Hannibal says that, means he's got a plan.
[Heroic instrumental music.]
l'm gonna go out to the reservation with Daniel.
You know, just dig up some background, talk to some of the elders.
AMY: Maybe there's a human interest story in all this.
Yeah, it looks like there sure could be.
We'll check into a motel.
There's a couple of more things l wanna get our hands on.
-We'll leave word where we are at the store.
-Okay.
lt's right over here, Miss Carter.
We shouldn't be taking too much longer getting these things loaded.
l sure hope you don't mind.
l know it was a long flight, but this was on the way back from the airport.
LANE: No problem.
Your uncle is real anxious to see you.
DANlEL: Would you move, please? STRYKER: ''Please.
'' Looks like you did learn something about how to act in front of people.
That's good, because the next time-- There's not gonna be no next time.
You've got that straight.
You're not stealing any more of those horses.
STRYKER: Kid's got a crazy mouth on him, chief.
Maybe somebody ought to teach him to respect his elders.
Don't you think you've done enough already? This looks like a job for the Range Rider.
l'm gonna shut this fool up for good.
l think Murdock's right.
Really? -Yeah.
-Let's go.
[Dramatic instrumental music.]
FACE: They'll never recognise us.
[Dramatic instrumental music intensifies.]
HANNlBAL: You look like a bunch of girls waiting for a date at a square dance.
And just who the heck are you? l'm the mysterious rider of the plains, the Range Rider and these are my trusty companions.
Boys, looks like we found ourselves some goofballs.
[Fast-paced instrumental music.]
You tell Mr.
Carter he's out of the rustling business.
HANNlBAL: No more mustangs leave that valley.
lt should be gold, but.
Well, l think you understand.
This looks like it's gonna get real interesting real soon.
Yep, it usually does.
CARTER: Use your knees more, honey.
CARTER: Let up on the reins, give the little neck more lead.
We're gonna move the horses over to the corral at sundown so we can load them.
How many we got? We got enough for two boxes but we only got one empty car on the train.
Unless you just wanna not make that delivery to McGivers.
No, l done already told him he'd get his beef.
Just load up the one boxcar.
We'll ship the rest out this weekend.
What you gonna do about these guys we told you about, Bus? Who? That bunch of masked yahoos riding around like a High Plains Drifter or somebody? The Range Rider, Bus.
Cloud of dust, fiery horse.
They said we shouldn't be shipping no more horses to the dog food company.
That so? Thanks.
Uncle Bus, l'm through.
l kept Sentinel ready all year long waiting for you to visit.
You only been riding about an hour.
l think l'm a little saddle sore.
Somehow, riding the horse trails in San Francisco just isn't quite the same.
Honey, l keep telling you, you gotta grip with your knees.
Keeps you from bouncing around and hurting your.
self.
l think l'll wash up for lunch now.
My niece is a good girl.
Young, idealistic.
But l'm afraid she might not understand that them horses could wipe out in a week what would be a month's good grazing for my cattle.
lt bothers me a lot that she even might have the slightest inkling of what we're doing.
l'm sorry, Bus, but that lndian kid just shot his mouth off before l could do anything.
She thinks you're rounding up them stray mustangs over to the reservation behind my back.
l told her l'd look into it.
l don't want no more dirt tracked around here.
You understand? Yes, sir.
And don't worry, we'll find out who these crackerboxes are.
l got a couple men over at Lodi looking through the local places where they might be staying.
lf they're still around.
l got a feeling they are.
l figure it's that lndian.
And he's rounded himself up some help.
Only help l'm worried about him getting is legal help.
On the other hand, if he's just hired himself a couple of gunslingers we know how to handle that, don't we? [Horn blowing.]
No.
No, l don't hear nothing.
MURDOCK: Are you sure? [Horse whinnying.]
l don't hear nothing but if you're positive that-- l'm warning you, l've had enough of you talking to your invisible friend.
Does he look invisible? You can't see him? lnvisible or not, l don't want you talking to nobody.
Got that? Well, l'm sorry, but l'm not the one with the bad attitude.
When someone talks to me l feel obliged to respond in kind.
lt's a horse! And horses don't talk! [Singing.]
A horse is a horse, of course, of course and no one can taIk to a horse, of course unIess, of course the horse is the famous Mr.
Ed Murdock, any sign? [Murdock choking on radio.]
B.
A.
, take your hand off Murdock's throat.
Yeah.
Ed says.
Ain't no train coming.
-Who's Ed? -Guess? [Horse whinnying.]
Train coming, muchachos.
And l ain't telling you who told us.
[Whinnying.]
FACE: Got that, Amy? AMY: Great.
Face, this stuff really stinks.
What is in this grease anyway? FACE: lt's not grease.
AMY: What is it? Face? You know, this worked great in a movie l did.
The Giant GiIa Monster Versus BiIIy the Kid, right? -You remember that one.
-Who could forget it? [Train horn blowing.]
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
l think you know what to do.
HANNlBAL: Go on, you devils! MURDOCK: Once again, the mysterious Rider of the Range deals another triumphant blow for the rights of the oppressed.
-Don't ask.
-l wasn't going to.
MURDOCK.
: [Singing.]
I'm just a Ionesome cowboy I'm just a Ionesome cowboy And I got no summer home Whoever heard of bandits on horseback in the 1980s? According to Wesley, they came riding down on the train like they was the James gang or something.
l want you and the boys to get out there and round up them mustangs before they get to the grassland and wipe out my herd.
First thing tomorrow morning, l want you to you ship them and every other horse we got out of here.
And find them yahoos.
Well, Bus, we've checked every hotel there is in Lodi and l got a man watching the reservation.
But lf they're just camping out someplace we're talking about hundreds of thousands of acres.
Then use the chopper.
Do whatever you gotta do, but find them.
Morning, Miss Lane.
l wouldn't have thought you'd be up this early.
-l heard you talking.
-Just some business problems.
[Hannibal whistles.]
HANNlBAL: l don't mind if l do.
Who the devil are you? What are you doing here? You'll find out.
This is a stupid move.
You yahoos are crazy to come back here.
l agree.
l told you it was crazy.
He never listens.
We're here to file a grievance against the Carter Railway Line for the Wild Horses of America, Western Divisions.
Not to be confused with the Horses' Butts of America of which we hear you are a member of long standing.
And we would deeply appreciate it if you would stop harassing our dues-paying loyal membership which includes all the wild mustangs that run in this free land.
Both of you are dead.
No, wait, you don't seem to get the point here.
We're the ones making the threats and you better believe us.
We hear so much as a neigh from one of those mustangs out there we'll be back to hogtie and brand you for good.
Now you get all of your papers out of your safe that have to do with the slaughter-house you do business with in Mexico.
Now.
Bingo.
Puppy Love Dog Food Company in Ensenada.
-Great shot.
-Yeah.
Get out of here! Hold your fire! Don't shoot! lt's awfully kind of Miss Carter to escort us out.
HANNlBAL: Tell them.
All right, l want all you high school dropouts to count to 1 25 before you even twitch.
Get them.
[Tense instrumental music.]
Move it! [Peaceful instrumental music.]
What do you say, Murdock? Anyone sniffing around? Daniel and Shelly dropped by with some grub.
They're still here.
Otherwise, it's been real quiet.
FACE: Yeah, l'll bet it is, especially without Thunder to keep you company.
And B.
A.
said something awful to Ed, and now he ain't talking to nobody.
MURDOCK: Colonel, what about this bush business? l'm done with it, you hear me? Not exactly coming naturally, is it? lt's like anything else, Amy.
lt takes some practise and a little technique.
A lot like driving a golf ball or shooting skeet.
Come on.
Okay, bring it up.
Straighten this arm and crook your elbow.
Very nice.
AMY: Boy, the well is never dry with you, is it, Face? lf l had pulled that ''let me show you how to aim that thing'' routine you'd never let me hear the end of it.
l caught the act as l rode up.
So, how's the arm, Danny? FeeIing better, is it? l'd like to introduce our guest.
This is Miss Carter.
-Bus Carter's niece? -That's right.
Just how long do you think you can get away with this? -With what? -Holding me against my will.
We're not holding you against your will.
We just borrowed you.
HANNlBAL: You're free to go anytime.
LANE: You kidnapped me.
That was just to keep from being dropped in a deep hole on Bus Carter's north 40.
We're not the criminals around here.
We will let the law decide that.
l don't think your Uncle would want to bring the law in on this.
They might investigate too deeply and find out that he's been rounding up wild mustangs and selling them illegally.
LANE: My uncle? B.
A.
: That's right, your uncle.
They round up the horses, then ship them by train to a dog food company in Mexico.
lt'd make real interesting reading for Amy's subscribers.
l see you got yourself some new arrows there.
Kid, listen, l just brought one jacket, so.
l tried to convince myself it was Stryker.
l even went to Uncle Bus.
l guess l believed he was involved all along.
You just walk up that way north, you should come across your uncle's men by dawn.
We'd give you a horse to ride, but then one of us would be on foot.
So, happy trails.
Aren't you afraid l'll tell him where your camp is, or what you look like? By that time, we'll have struck camp and be long gone.
HANNlBAL: As for what we look like l don't plan on sticking around long enough to get picked out of a line-up.
Wait.
l think l heard my uncle saying that there's still more horses to be shipped out and that Stryker should get that done first thing.
Adiós.
MURDOCK: [Singing.]
I'm an oId cowhand From the Rio Grande And I Iearned to ride before I Iearned to stand B.
A.
: lf you don't shut up, l'll knock you off that horse! Yippy-l-O-Ki-Ay.
Murdock, why don't you take rearguard in case one of Carter's men picks up our trail? Carter knows we have all the proof we need to shut him down right here.
Has to figure we're gonna head for the hills.
We are heading for the hills, aren't we, Hannibal? l don't know.
lt's gonna take a couple of days for Amy to file that story and get an investigation started.
Carter's niece did say there's another shipment of mustangs -going out tomorrow morning.
-Hannibal, come on.
Hitting this guy's train twice in a row.
That's kind of pushing it, isn't it? A lot.
That's why we gotta get some stuff together to keep him from pushing back too hard.
Carter's no idiot.
He has to figure that us making another run on his train so soon it's insane.
He'll never be ready for us.
No, l don't think he'll ever be ready for us.
You think he'll be ready for us? -Yeah, l do.
-So do l.
Better sharpen your pencil and your spurs, Face.
You know, we're only one step ahead of Decker, too.
-Don't worry, l've considered that.
-Of course you have.
[Laughing.]
l think he's going to be big problems.
Colonel, they're here.
DECKER: They sure are.
DECKER: Apparently they mixed it up with a couple of locals right here yesterday.
No one seems to know what it's about, but knowing Hannibal Smith and his men they've probably took on some bleeding-heart cause or other.
No doubt requested by Daniel Running Bear.
The shop-keeper said they picked up some camping gear and other supplies so they're out there somewhere.
lt could take forever to find three people camping on the open range.
We'll track them down through Daniel Running Bear.
Let's go see the sheriff and find out exactly where we can find Running Bear.
Once we've found him, l'm sure the A-Team won't be far away.
Come on, Amy, l could use the help.
l'm sure you could, but l'm through being suckered by you.
lt's just a straight little scam.
lt'll go down easy, and it'll get us everything Hannibal wants.
Come on.
Pretty please? Pretty? See, the brother-sister act will work great for this.
Face, what was in the grease? -l told you.
-No, you didn't tell me.
l can still smell it.
Well, it had a little of this.
And a little of that.
l know, you told me that.
But that's not enough, Face.
-Come on, Amy.
What do you say? -Sorry, Face.
lf l told you what was in that stuff, l'm sure you wouldn't help.
What? Never mind.
l'll do it on my own.
Go and check with the office.
l'll meet you back here in a bit.
Colonel, it's Peck! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
[Car horn honking.]
[Dog growling.]
Can l try one of these on? Thanks.
Where did he go? DECKER: Sorry, ma'am.
That's the second time he's done that to me.
Thanks.
l really appreciate your trusting me like that.
Let's just say l liked your face.
Do l have an honest face? No.
But l like it.
[Amusing instrumental music.]
Get on the horn, Crane, and get me the 10 best men available.
CRANE: Best men, sir? DECKER: l'm talking about the best marksmen that can be rounded up and flown in here before the day is out.
Yes, sir.
At least we got them located.
We know they're still here.
They're still here.
And this is gonna be the A-Team's Waterloo.
[lntense instrumental music.]
You gotta be kidding.
Carter's gonna be ready for us.
We need a real hole card.
Considering Decker's presence puts a damper on most possible sources of supplies, l think l did rather well.
Look at it as a challenge, B.
A.
Face, l wanted an all-terrain vehicle.
FACE: The important thing to remember is we need something that can cover the same ground as a train.
The only thing this thing gonna cover is the corner of a junkyard.
Mr.
Ed could teach you how to fix it, B.
A.
Only he's not gonna.
Well, B.
A.
, what do you think? Oh, Hannibal.
HANNlBAL: How did l know you were gonna say that? [Adventurous instrumental music.]
[Adventurous instrumental music continues.]
lt was right around here somewhere, wasn't it, Wesley? Just up past that bend.
You don't think they'd hit us twice, do you? l mean, two days in a row? Yeah? What's that? Here they come.
Right on schedule.
Don't look like they're slowing down, man.
They'll slow down.
They have to.
You keep a full head of steam.
-Are you crazy? -l said just keep going.
Son of a gun.
They're not slowing down.
[Wheels screeching.]
All right, back this thing up, hurry! All right, turn those mustangs loose or start singing Empty SaddIes.
HANNlBAL: B.
A.
, bring her back! HANNlBAL: Forward, B.
A.
! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
All right, last chance.
Drop your guns.
Don't be shy.
Come on! Go, B.
A.
[Face exclaiming warningly.]
No sneaking up from behind.
Drop it.
HANNlBAL: All right, open them up.
You heard the man.
Open it up.
[Horses neighing.]
Let's go, B.
A.
Come on, Face! Let's get out of here! [Fast-paced instrumental music continues.]
Thanks for waiting.
You better step on it.
-l'm going as fast as l can! -Right.
l love it when a plan comes together.
We're gonna have to replace these pieces of rail, it's the only way.
You guys sure do know how to make a nuisance of yourselves, don't you? We do our best.
All right, let's get to work.
Grab a length of that track and move it over here so we can back this train off the spur.
-That's gonna take some time.
-Let's get moving, then! Last thing we need is this train full of horses just sitting.
Mr.
Carter wants them out of here.
Let's do it! We'd offer to help, but.
Skipper, you take a ride with me.
l'm sure Mr.
Carter wants to have a few words with you.
That's fine.
l got a few words for him.
Throw these other two in the caboose.
We'll take care of them on down the line.
-Hang in there.
-Yeah, right.
Don't hold your breath.
There ain't no cavalry in this picture.
You keep thinking that.
[Military instrumental music.]
l'm gonna stick with Hannibal.
You guys go get some help.
[Heroic instrumental music.]
Where did he learn how to do that? Just like the real Range Rider.
CARTER: lf it ain't old Buffalo Bill himself.
lt wouldn't do me any good to call you names 'cause l can't imagine any name you haven't been called before.
You're a lucky man you didn't harm my niece.
Because of that, l'm not gonna make you die slow.
How long will it be before that train's ready to roll? l told them to just keep on humping.
Absolutely.
l mean the last thing you need is to get caught with a boxcar full of stolen mustangs attached to your own train.
You tell Jesse to fire up the bird.
l'm gonna shoot out there with you, see those guys don't mess up.
CARTER: No telling who else these yahoos called in.
l want that train over the border into Mexico.
What about him? Fertilise the south 40 with him.
Have a nice day.
l need a distraction.
l want you to count to three.
No.
Count to five real slow and then scream for all you're worth.
LANE: [Screaming.]
Fire! Help, the stable's on fire! [Triumphant instrumental music.]
[Horse neighing.]
Lane, give me my knife and my gun.
Were they really going to kill you? l think that was the general idea.
-What about the others? -Right where we left them.
l figured they weren't going anywhere.
Besides, l had to come for you.
Good idea.
Let's go.
Take care of Whacko for me.
HANNlBAL: That's Waco, Murdock.
MURDOCK: Waco.
CARTER: After you get those horses to Mexico, go find that lndian.
Make sure he don't hire any more heIp.
The sheriff? l thought those guys were wanted.
l think we should try to swing by the reservation.
Maybe we can pick up a bunch of the guys who'll help.
And if not, then we'd be wasting time.
l wanna head straight for the sheriff's.
AMY: My worry is keeping those guys from being killed.
Hannibal can always find a way to escape.
That sounds like the way Hannibal would think.
Holy.
DECKER: How lucky for me, running into you like this.
l don't understand.
DECKER: You are Daniel Running Bear, aren't you? Why do you ask? Your license plate.
And l have a description of this vehicle.
l'm Col.
Decker of the U.
S.
Army.
I've been trying to reach you at home aII day.
DECKER: l finally decided to drive up to speak with you.
Good thing, too, or we might have missed each other again.
l have a lot of important things to take care of-- So do l.
l want to know where the A-Team is.
-The A-Team? -Yes.
l'm sure you can tell me.
lf not, l feel certain Miss Allen can.
And l'm prepared to stand here all week.
CARTER: l hope you yahoos enjoy your little trip, courtesy Carter Railways.
Unfortunately, though, there ain't no return tickets.
l've always wanted to see the country by rail.
[Train horn blowing.]
Get rid of them guys.
We don't want any outlaw witnesses on board.
STRYKER: All right, the rest of you head on back.
Let's get some work done.
STRYKER: We've still got some steers need branding.
And when you get across the border, adiós, yahoos.
[Suspenseful instrumental music.]
[Suspenseful instrumental music intensifies.]
Go! [Horn blowing.]
Will you hold still? You're gonna rub me raw with these little ropes.
l ain't moving, it's the train moving.
Boy, that's great.
That's just what we need, an Abbott and Costello routine.
DRlVER: Where are you going? STRYKER: You don't stop, no matter what.
You got that? [Gripping instrumental music.]
Boy, you must be getting real weak.
You can't break these puny little ropes.
[B.
A.
grunting.]
l was just kidding.
B.
A.
, grab that brake wheel.
We gotta stop this train.
[Wheels screeching.]
Coming to the border.
lf those mustangs get into Mexico, we got no evidence.
Good job, B.
A.
There's Murdock.
-B.
A.
? -Nighty-night.
HANNlBAL: Face, take my hat for a minute.
FACE: Sure.
B.
A.
, give me your hand.
[B.
A.
grunts.]
Hannibal, we got a bogey at 1 1 :00.
MURDOCK: Come on.
Adiós, bonanza.
Hannibal, come on, let's go! HANNlBAL: He's not close enough! FACE: What? Are you crazy? HANNlBAL: l wouldn't sleep at all tonight if he didn't see the expression on my face.
MURDOCK: Time's a-wasting, partner.
So long, pal.
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
-Told you he'd do it.
-That's right.
l think there's something real interesting you'd like to know about that train.
lt's used to move out wild mustangs off the reservation illegally.
And l think this gentleman has a lot to answer for.
l do believe that's a federal offence, isn't it, Colonel? Yes, ma'am, it is.
Next time, Hannibal Smith.
Next time.
[Triumphant instrumental music.]
[Cheerful instrumental music.]
Look at them.
lt's like they know they aren't being hunted anymore.
How great to be free.
We gotta get going before Decker finds out we never left the county.
You know, even though he doesn't have anything positive on me you can bet he'll probably have me under constant surveillance when l get home.
So l thought maybe l'd stay here a while.
-Gather a little background material? -Something like that.
Then if Amy'll loan us her car, l guess we can give you a ride to Phoenix Airport.
Great.
Here, B.
A.
That's so you can show them to the kids in your class.
Help them understand better so they can make one.
Thanks, little brother.
l'm sure the kids at my daycare centre will love the gift.
-Okay.
-So long.
Daniel, will you say goodbye to Ed for me? And will you tell him that if he ever needs me if he ever feels the need to talk to anyone that l'll always lend an ear? Good.
'Cause you ain't got no brains.
Sure, Murdock.
[Valiant instrumental music.]
They really did it.
They always do.
Here, buckaroo.
Hey, he forgot his mask.
No, he didn't forget his mask.
He just left it behind because his job here is done.
[Peaceful country song.]
[Theme music.]
These men promptIy escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los AngeIes underground.
Today, stiII wanted by the government, they survive as soIdiers of fortune.
If you have a probIem, if no one eIse can heIp and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the A-Team.
[Theme music.]
[Peaceful instrumental music.]
[Gun firing.]
[Neighing fearfully.]
[Racy instrumental music.]
All right, head them up over there.
This load of glue ain't getting away.
Get them! lt's that crazy lndian! [Gun firing.]
[Racy instrumental music continues.]
[Gunfire continues.]
-Stay on him.
-That lndian's nuts, Stryker.
He's also gonna be dead.
[Gun firing.]
Get closer.
[Horse neighing fearfully.]
Chief, you're gonna be real sorry.
STRYKER: Bus? -Carter.
-This is Stryker.
Herd got away.
You radioed before you was chasing them into the valley.
-How'd they get out? -lt was that lndian again.
-You let him get away again, too? -No, sir.
Not this time.
You send him back to his reservation in a basket, you hear? These men have been wanted for over 10 years.
lt's time that we closed the file.
The case has been back burner for years, General.
lt's common knowledge Col.
Lynch has been waging his own ridiculous little vendetta.
Precisely why Col.
Lynch is now out and this matter is hanging fire.
These three soldiers were tried and convicted because of extreme political pressure at the time.
Which is something that you should understand.
Yes, sir.
They were practically forgotten about within a couple of years of their escape.
But Lynch keeps throwing balls down their alley and now he's mushroomed this whole thing into what's considered to be a highly embarrassing series of situations.
Look at that.
December 3, '77, they relieved Col.
Lynch of one executive jet belonging to the military.
[Military instrumental music.]
Who is that? That? That's nothing.
File it under old business.
[Siren wailing.]
[Thrilling instrumental music.]
DECKER: Two months Iater, he Iost five MP cars in a high speed pursuit.
[Sirens continue wailing.]
Hang on, kid.
[Motorbike engine revving.]
We should be meeting B.
A.
any minute.
FACE: Look out, Hannibal! For which we had to make restitution to shopkeepers whose storefronts were destroyed by Lynch's actions.
And then, last year after the newspaper headlines said they'd captured the Team they escaped from a full security military installation.
DECKER: Taking with them a miIitary troop pIane under Lynch's command.
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
HANNlBAL: Go, Murdock! You know, all in all they've made a fine bunch of jackasses out of all of us and l want it to stop now.
GENERAL: l want you to bring the A-Team in.
GENERAL: You were the best troubleshooter the past two wars.
Until extreme political pressures knocked the hat off my career and any possibility of furthering my rank.
lt seems the very methods that made me an embarrassment and shuffled me off to the side are the exact reasons l'm being considered the best man for this job.
GENERAL: l'm not saying-- DECKER: We know what you're saying so let's don't dance around the floor once.
Everybody heard the reports from 'Nam on these guys.
They were the best.
Because they're fast, sharp and unorthodox.
DECKER: The way to catch men like this is to play by their rules.
Which means there are none.
What l'm interested in, Colonel, is results.
l don't expect detailed reports on the whats, hows or whens of their apprehension.
l just want to know that it's done.
GENERAL: You erase the blot from our records and l'll be very pleased.
GENERAL: Which means that others will be very pleased.
Do what you have to do.
Get me the A-Team.
Yes, sir.
-Morning.
-Yeah, morning.
Are you the only hot dog vendor here in the park? Do you see any other hot dog vendors? -No.
-Well, you won't.
l got a contract with the city.
Could l have a hot dog, please? You kidding? You mean a lukewarm dog.
-l just fired her up.
-Well, that's fine, whatever.
There's a coffee shop across the street, got hot food, got good breakfast rolls, too.
No.
l'd like a hot dog.
[Muttering.]
l never heard of anybody eating hot dogs at 1 1 :00.
DANlEL: What? HANNlBAL: l said l never heard of anybody eating hot dogs at 1 1 :00.
Then why do you open up at 1 1 :00? HANNlBAL: l don't open up, son.
HANNlBAL: l fire up at 1 1 :00.
The dogs are ready by noon.
Then l'm ready for the lunch crowd.
l work from noon to 4:00.
l've been doing that for about 28 years.
l'm a well established firm around here.
Well, that's great.
Then maybe you know Mr.
Lee.
HANNlBAL: Who? DANlEL: Mr.
Lee.
DANlEL: He owns the Chinese laundry up over on Sixth Street.
-A Chinaman? -Yes.
Never heard of him.
He told me to come on down here to buy a hot dog.
l wish he'd told me.
'Cause l'd have told him to tell you not to come till noon.
See, l fire up at 1 1 :00, but the dogs aren't ready till noon.
l guess you don't know.
Sorry l bothered you.
You forgot your dog.
-That's okay-- -No.
l can't take it back.
lt's a health law.
And we don't want to throw it away.
There are people out there starving who would just love a cold hot dog.
-l guess you're right.
-That's 75 cents.
-Keep the change.
-Thank you very much.
[Mysterious instrumental music.]
Here you go, B.
A.
No mustard.
Hannibal, how many more of these cold hot dogs l got to eat? l'll save this one.
[Hannibal sighing.]
l had to have them for props.
You don't want me to waste good money, do you? That dude definitely wasn't being followed.
So if he's a birddog for the military, he ain't got no backup.
Yeah, l haven't seen any MPs.
My conversation with him as Mr.
Lee, l'd say he's a good man with a real problem.
We gotta help him.
l'll get Amy, you go spring Murdock and get Face.
l don't know where Face is.
Been trying to reach him since yesterday.
l'm telling you, Boobie, we shoot all three pictures at once.
That way we get the two sequels in the can while we're shooting the first one.
-And if the first one opens big-- -l hear you, Mick.
But, believe me, we're talking major box office business here.
Gretel, babe, you've met the Mick, haven't you? l'm real happy the Jer could fly you over for the premiere.
[Gretel speaking in German.]
lt's going to be a big night.
Everyone who's anyone is here.
The screening is scheduled to start in 15 minutes, Colonel.
Let's get ready to move.
He'll have too much advantage in a darkened theatre.
Are the men inside ready? -Yes, sir.
-Let's do it.
FACE: first eight or nine weeks, $30 million.
You take that and reinvest it.
You can get four or five more pictures going.
l talked to a guy at MGM-- WAlTER: Mr.
Johnson, there's a telephone call for you.
For me? Take a message.
WAlTER: You wouldn't want these people to know that you're really Templeton Peck of the A-Team, would you? WAlTER: Follow me.
Excuse me.
Overseas.
Could be that spot in Cannes l was hoping for.
Gretel, babe, keep the Mick company.
FACE: The Jer'll be back in a second.
What a guy.
[Light instrumental music playing.]
WAlTER: Here.
Hannibal, what is this? What's going on? That's my line.
l'm meeting a client tonight in case you'd like to know.
B.
A.
hasn't been able to reach you since yesterday.
He should've left a message at the Beverly Hills office.
l didn't know we had one.
And what is this? FACE: Bad picture.
Look at.
They must've caught me leaving La Serre on Thursday.
You'd think they'd hire a professional photographer -for a front page picture.
-Did you know you've lost your drive wheel? -l mean, what do you think you're doing? -l've decided to produce.
-Miracle Films.
-''lf it's a good film, it's a Miracle.
'' -Catchy, huh? -You're nuts.
Now, who did you scam to spring for this little extravaganza? FACE: No, that's just it, Hannibal.
ln Hollywood, when you get someone else to pay the freight you're not scamming, you're producing.
FACE: There's tons of guys who don't know what to do with their money just dying to get into showbiz.
The glamour, the broads, the parties.
l've waited 20 years for someone to throw a party like this for me.
-How do you do it? -See.
l needed a showpiece, so l scrambled around looking for any piece of junk l could get my hands on.
And l come across this little number for $10,000 made by a couple of film students.
So, l dub it in German then l subtitle it back into English and tell everyone l brought it from overseas.
The critics see that, and right away you're looking down the business end of a good review.
Yeah, but Wine For Breakfast? Yeah, that's just one of the little touches.
You give it a lousy title and tell everyone it doesn't translate well from the original.
FACE: Forget that.
l want you to read a script.
lt's gonna be my first stateside production.
The Beast of the YeIIow Night.
FACE: And guess who'll play the beast of the title role? l'm telling you, by the time l'm done they're gonna put your claw prints out front in the cement.
And they're gonna put you behind bars.
FACE: Come on, Hannibal you don't think Col.
Lynch reads the film business trades, do you? HANNlBAL: Face-- FACE: No, relax.
Why don't you come on up and meet some of the guys? l have to meet a client.
l already ran him by Mr.
Lee and the hot dog vendor and l'm gonna snap him up and take the case.
HANNlBAL: l came to tell you to meet B.
A.
at the hospital and spring Murdock.
Amy's gonna meet us at the warehouse.
FACE: No, not tonight.
HANNlBAL: lt must be tonight.
FACE: l got a few guys l'm gonna turn for a few million.
l can't just douse the house lights and give them a box of popcorn to remember me by.
-What? -You're not George Lucas.
No, you're not.
Now we need the job.
This guy, Daniel Running Bear, needs our help.
Go get Murdock.
And keep your head down.
l've got a feeling Lynch is outside this minute.
Military police! Everybody down! [All screaming.]
Give it up, Peck! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
-You'll call me? -Yeah, the first chance l get.
[Women screaming.]
Hurry up, get after him! The one who catches him keeps his rank.
HANNlBAL: Mr.
Johnson's looking for you.
l've been right here.
Well, you should be back there.
There's a real fender bender in the lot.
[Fast-paced instrumental music continues.]
[Sirens wailing.]
Somebody ought to tell this guy.
He's got a shimmy at 85.
[Car horns honking.]
You want me to get that? l'm fine.
Hang on.
They'll never catch us.
Who in the world is this guy? lt sure isn't Lynch.
l don't know.
But it's gonna be fun finding out.
[Upbeat instrumental music.]
[Sombre instrumental music.]
-l'm sorry.
What? -Nothing.
Wait a minute, you okay? Fine, yeah.
You got a problem? No, l just thought maybe you were hungry.
Here.
My wallet! DANlEL: Wait a minute! COP: You got a problem here? l could have given you a couple of bucks.
No, Officer.
Yeah? Well, let's see some lD.
Yes, sir.
HANNlBAL: Yeah, you both better get in the car.
We'll kick this around.
Do we have to do this, Officer? There's nothing really happening here.
HANNlBAL: Get in the car.
DANlEL: Wait a minute! What about him? HANNlBAL: Get in.
-What's going on here? -Now Daniel Running Bear what are you doing in Los Angeles? l came here to meet some people.
The A-Team? -l'm Hannibal Smith.
-Hannibal Smith? HANNlBAL: Yeah.
DANlEL: This has all been pretty weird.
Yeah, l know.
But it gets slower from here on.
l hope so, because l don't think l could handle another crazy scene.
MURDOCK: And so, the Range Rider defeats the Black Rock gang in another daring shootout.
NARRATOR: [On TV.]
Once again making the pIains safe for aII who dare brave the untamed west.
No matter race nor creed the Range Rider stands for truth and justice for aII.
[Dramatic country music playing on TV.]
MURDOCK: lt's all right, girl.
MURDOCK: l must have been wrong.
MURDOCK: The Black Rock gang has lured us into this cave and then they've pushed a boulder in front of the opening.
MURDOCK: But there has to be another way out.
How about right here through this window? MURDOCK: Lucky you showed up with a flashlight.
MURDOCK: There's a blackout at the building.
That's because B.
A.
is jumping the master circuit so the alarm wouldn't go off.
Murdock, what are you wearing? MURDOCK: l guess my secret's out.
You've discovered my alter ego.
You're not Professor Nutty Butty again, are you? FACE: Rex the Wonder Dog? MURDOCK: No.
lt's just that when you phoned you said we were going up against some horse rustlers.
MURDOCK: Who better to defeat them than the mysterious lawman of the plains the Range Rider.
You got me there.
Now come on, Murdock.
FACE: l told B.
A.
to turn on the juice in about 10 minutes.
FACE: Any longer than that and they'll start a room check.
FACE: Nighty-night, Murdock.
MURDOCK: Thunder, girl.
No, Thunder's not who l think she is? MURDOCK: Whoa, girl.
l don't know, Murdock you know how B.
A.
feels about having Billy in his van, and he's just a dog.
MURDOCK: The Range Rider would sooner face a dozen bandits without his six-shooters than not have Thunder at his side.
MURDOCK: No man is tall enough to come between me and my trusty steed.
MURDOCK: Come, girl.
Sucker, you better not be talking to no invisible animals.
FACE: Here we go again.
B.
A.
: Come on.
[Country music resumes playing on TV.]
-Thanks.
-Sure.
NARRATOR: [On TV.]
Once again, the faithfuI rider of the range is off on another great adventure.
Murdock, in case someone spots us we don't want them to recognise you and blow the alarm.
MURDOCK: Good idea, Kemosabe.
That's B.
A.
Baracus's van.
Yeah, it pulled up while you were inside so l slipped out and attached a homer to it.
CRANE: Good move, Sergeant.
Murdock's still in his room.
l guess they still visit him on occasion.
They were part of the same unit.
Any sign of Smith? Couldn't see, too dark.
But l figured they'd lead us right to the good Colonel.
[Upbeat instrumental music.]
-Anybody follow you? -No, l was real careful.
Col.
Decker, l think we've got the A-Team.
[Greeting in Native American language.]
MURDOCK: You must be Chief Running Bear who has summoned help to save them wild horses from being slaughtered by rustlers.
DANlEL: This keeps getting better.
First you take me off Hollywood Boulevard dressed as a cop and now the Range Rider shows up.
You know the Range Rider? MURDOCK: A full-blooded American lndian living on the open plains of Arizona where the Range Rider dispenses his justice? MURDOCK: Naturally, he's heard of me.
l used to catch the Saturday morning reruns when l was at UCLA.
-Mr.
Running Bear.
-Daniel.
Daniel, there is a federal bureau that watches over wild mustangs.
Yes, but like any other branch of the government too much to govern, too few people to do it.
There are thousands of wild horses spread over the United States.
And every one of them is protected by law.
Yes.
But when someone like Bus Carter breaks the law it's very hard to press charges.
The largest land-owner.
And his standing with the local Cattlemen's Association makes him a very influential man in the county.
He also plays dirty.
To be perfectly honest with you l've had most of my wardrobe made for the year and l don't have anything to go with one of those.
So l'm afraid l'll have to return this money you gave us.
Face.
Look, l'm sorry l didn't tell Mr.
Lee l didn't have enough to cover your fee.
HANNlBAL: No, you're not.
You're right.
l had to meet you to convince you how important this really is.
We've had it happen to us before, haven't we, Amy? l don't think it ever hurts to listen to anyone's troubles.
We're always working for chump change.
This time, we're trying to save a bunch of horses.
But these horses have been there for as long as my people can remember.
They're a part of the land, a part of my tribe.
Surely you can appreciate the importance of one's heritage and traditions.
l will raise the money eventually.
Look, all l ask is that you come down and take a look.
DANlEL: See for yourselves.
lf that doesn't convince you then l understand.
l guess anybody who's crazy enough to take on three jeeploads of armed rustlers on horseback by himself, deserves special consideration.
We're still working for almost nothing again.
MURDOCK: Once again the mysterious Range Rider sets out on another thrilling adventure with his trusty steed, Thunder, who.
Who will remain behind just this one time.
Well, guys, shall we saddle up? [Gunfire.]
DECKER: This is CoI.
Decker of the U.
S.
Army.
You are compIeteIy surrounded.
No kidding? Col.
Decker, did you hear that? You know this guy? Everyone in Vietnam knew him.
He always got the job done under any circumstances and he never lost any sleep over how he did it.
Yeah, Hannibal and this guy mixed it up once in the DOOM Club.
The DOOM Club? The Da Nang Officers' Open Mess.
You didn't like the way he sugared his coffee? No.
l didn't like the way he blew up Cong hospitals like a favourite sport.
Give yourseIf up or I'II fIush the whoIe buiIding and everyone inside right in the sewer.
-ls he kidding? -Sounds like he's crazy! -Decker is crazy.
-Maybe l should go out and talk to him.
You want me to start bIasting, Smith? -Well, Hannibal? -l'm thinking.
[Gunfire continues.]
Think faster, man! Hey, Decker, this is Smith.
You ought to cool out.
What if we have an innocent person in here? Who might that be? Amy AIIen? I'd hardIy caII her innocent.
Okay, look-- No taIk.
You come out or we come in.
And you're not gonna Iike it if we come in.
I'm giving you two minutes.
Don't you love it? No matter how smart they think they are, they always screw up somehow.
HANNlBAL: Let's get the weapons out of the van.
What are we gonna do in two minutes? You heard the man.
We're going out the front door.
lt's obvious they really have no choice.
With anyone but Col.
Hannibal Smith.
With him, nothing is obvious.
What can he do? We'll find out in about 40 seconds.
[Thrilling instrumental music.]
Looks like you stopped the A-Team once and for all.
-What about Hannibal? -He'll be all right.
MP 1 : Get those civilians back! Keep them out of the way! All right, show's over.
Go back to work.
Come on, move along.
HANNlBAL: Hey, you got a light, pal? MP 2: Sure.
MP 2: Keep them.
HANNlBAL: Thanks, pal.
[Victorious instrumental music.]
FACE: Beautiful Arizona.
Quiet, serene, the comatose state.
You ought to scout locations for your next movie here.
That career sure went fast.
Talk about the sizzle and fizzle of Hollywood.
Move over, man.
Give me room.
FACE: Will you take it easy? You're gonna break my rib.
This fool won't gimme no room! l didn't design this thing.
Besides, there ain't enough room for four of us.
Four of us.
What do you mean? Three of us, sucker! You got that? B.
A.
: You hear me, sucker? There's three of us.
No animal, no nothing.
Got it? Say three or he's gonna bounce you down the hyphenated line.
Okay, three! AMY: Will you guys knock it off? On my reporter's salary, l can't afford to buy a new car every time you guys get together in it.
lt's a long ride, and this is not the most comfortable car.
l'm comfortable.
We wouldn't be going through this, if you didn't leave my van behind! -You said you was gonna lose those MPs.
-l did.
But you didn't bring my van back.
l worked hard on them wheels, Hannibal.
l'm sure it'll turn up sooner or later.
[Crane chugging.]
lt's empty.
We can drag the bay.
Don't waste the energy.
All of the bodies couldn't have washed out.
How did he do it? DECKER: He's Hannibal Smith.
That's how he does it.
lt would have been easy for him to jump clear of the van before it hit the water and then drift off with the rest of this crowd.
For a while, l thought this was gonna be easy.
Anything on those prints we found at the warehouse, that weren't Smith's? Yeah.
Daniel Running Bear.
We had his prints on file from the military.
He served from '66 to '68, First Air Cav in Vietnam.
Get an address on this Running Bear.
He's a computer programmer in Arizona.
Lives on the Chequea lndian Reservation where he was born.
Let's pay Mr.
Running Bear a little visit find out what his story is.
lt's the easiest way up there.
lt's more comfortable than crowding into my Land Rover.
Man, horses! Don't you just love horses? When l can see them.
[Lilting country song.]
l was out here one night when l first saw Carter's men rounding up the horses.
Where they corral them l have no idea.
But then again, Carter has over 250,000 acres.
He can't sit on those mustangs for long.
You say he ships them by rail? Those railroad tracks that we passed coming out of town? That's his line.
He's got Iocomotives and boxcars which he uses to move out his cattIe.
l'm sure he takes the horses down to a slaughter-house in Mexico which is only a short run from here.
What about your people, brother? How can they let this happen? What about them? They're people just like anybody else.
They make a Iiving, go about their business just Iike any others.
They're not gonna dig out the war paint and saddle up and go against Carter's hacienda.
Besides, the Chequea were never a warring tribe.
They were fishermen who migrated south during the war of 1864.
No kidding? -Heck of a way to fish.
-Let me see that.
Be my guest.
Any more come this way, you can have them, too.
Chequea.
-The Chequea were a-- -What? A warring tribe.
[Screaming.]
DANlEL: Wait! Don't hurt him.
B.
A.
: lt's a kid.
Shelly, it's me! SHELLY: Daniel, l thought you were still in Los Angeles.
l just came back.
This is my nephew, Shelly.
How do you do? l believe this belongs to you.
What's wrong with you, kid? Firing these arrows at people.
Don't you know they're dangerous? They could hurt somebody real bad.
Couldn't you find better toys to play with? Not exactly great for 100%% worsted cotton either, kid.
l don't hit anything unless l want to.
l happen to be county champion.
l was just trying to scare you off.
SHELLY: Thought you were Bus Carter's men.
-They came out here with me to help.
-Yeah? SHELLY: You're gonna help us trash Carter and his men? Trash Carter? Shelly and Daniel Running Bear.
Wonder what Sitting Bull would think.
l don't know how the rest of you feel but l wouldn't sleep well tonight knowing those animals there are gonna wind up as the sticky side of a stamp.
He does it every time.
Does that mean you'll help? You'll stop Carter? -We're gonna try.
-That means we will.
Whenever Hannibal says that, means he's got a plan.
[Heroic instrumental music.]
l'm gonna go out to the reservation with Daniel.
You know, just dig up some background, talk to some of the elders.
AMY: Maybe there's a human interest story in all this.
Yeah, it looks like there sure could be.
We'll check into a motel.
There's a couple of more things l wanna get our hands on.
-We'll leave word where we are at the store.
-Okay.
lt's right over here, Miss Carter.
We shouldn't be taking too much longer getting these things loaded.
l sure hope you don't mind.
l know it was a long flight, but this was on the way back from the airport.
LANE: No problem.
Your uncle is real anxious to see you.
DANlEL: Would you move, please? STRYKER: ''Please.
'' Looks like you did learn something about how to act in front of people.
That's good, because the next time-- There's not gonna be no next time.
You've got that straight.
You're not stealing any more of those horses.
STRYKER: Kid's got a crazy mouth on him, chief.
Maybe somebody ought to teach him to respect his elders.
Don't you think you've done enough already? This looks like a job for the Range Rider.
l'm gonna shut this fool up for good.
l think Murdock's right.
Really? -Yeah.
-Let's go.
[Dramatic instrumental music.]
FACE: They'll never recognise us.
[Dramatic instrumental music intensifies.]
HANNlBAL: You look like a bunch of girls waiting for a date at a square dance.
And just who the heck are you? l'm the mysterious rider of the plains, the Range Rider and these are my trusty companions.
Boys, looks like we found ourselves some goofballs.
[Fast-paced instrumental music.]
You tell Mr.
Carter he's out of the rustling business.
HANNlBAL: No more mustangs leave that valley.
lt should be gold, but.
Well, l think you understand.
This looks like it's gonna get real interesting real soon.
Yep, it usually does.
CARTER: Use your knees more, honey.
CARTER: Let up on the reins, give the little neck more lead.
We're gonna move the horses over to the corral at sundown so we can load them.
How many we got? We got enough for two boxes but we only got one empty car on the train.
Unless you just wanna not make that delivery to McGivers.
No, l done already told him he'd get his beef.
Just load up the one boxcar.
We'll ship the rest out this weekend.
What you gonna do about these guys we told you about, Bus? Who? That bunch of masked yahoos riding around like a High Plains Drifter or somebody? The Range Rider, Bus.
Cloud of dust, fiery horse.
They said we shouldn't be shipping no more horses to the dog food company.
That so? Thanks.
Uncle Bus, l'm through.
l kept Sentinel ready all year long waiting for you to visit.
You only been riding about an hour.
l think l'm a little saddle sore.
Somehow, riding the horse trails in San Francisco just isn't quite the same.
Honey, l keep telling you, you gotta grip with your knees.
Keeps you from bouncing around and hurting your.
self.
l think l'll wash up for lunch now.
My niece is a good girl.
Young, idealistic.
But l'm afraid she might not understand that them horses could wipe out in a week what would be a month's good grazing for my cattle.
lt bothers me a lot that she even might have the slightest inkling of what we're doing.
l'm sorry, Bus, but that lndian kid just shot his mouth off before l could do anything.
She thinks you're rounding up them stray mustangs over to the reservation behind my back.
l told her l'd look into it.
l don't want no more dirt tracked around here.
You understand? Yes, sir.
And don't worry, we'll find out who these crackerboxes are.
l got a couple men over at Lodi looking through the local places where they might be staying.
lf they're still around.
l got a feeling they are.
l figure it's that lndian.
And he's rounded himself up some help.
Only help l'm worried about him getting is legal help.
On the other hand, if he's just hired himself a couple of gunslingers we know how to handle that, don't we? [Horn blowing.]
No.
No, l don't hear nothing.
MURDOCK: Are you sure? [Horse whinnying.]
l don't hear nothing but if you're positive that-- l'm warning you, l've had enough of you talking to your invisible friend.
Does he look invisible? You can't see him? lnvisible or not, l don't want you talking to nobody.
Got that? Well, l'm sorry, but l'm not the one with the bad attitude.
When someone talks to me l feel obliged to respond in kind.
lt's a horse! And horses don't talk! [Singing.]
A horse is a horse, of course, of course and no one can taIk to a horse, of course unIess, of course the horse is the famous Mr.
Ed Murdock, any sign? [Murdock choking on radio.]
B.
A.
, take your hand off Murdock's throat.
Yeah.
Ed says.
Ain't no train coming.
-Who's Ed? -Guess? [Horse whinnying.]
Train coming, muchachos.
And l ain't telling you who told us.
[Whinnying.]
FACE: Got that, Amy? AMY: Great.
Face, this stuff really stinks.
What is in this grease anyway? FACE: lt's not grease.
AMY: What is it? Face? You know, this worked great in a movie l did.
The Giant GiIa Monster Versus BiIIy the Kid, right? -You remember that one.
-Who could forget it? [Train horn blowing.]
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
l think you know what to do.
HANNlBAL: Go on, you devils! MURDOCK: Once again, the mysterious Rider of the Range deals another triumphant blow for the rights of the oppressed.
-Don't ask.
-l wasn't going to.
MURDOCK.
: [Singing.]
I'm just a Ionesome cowboy I'm just a Ionesome cowboy And I got no summer home Whoever heard of bandits on horseback in the 1980s? According to Wesley, they came riding down on the train like they was the James gang or something.
l want you and the boys to get out there and round up them mustangs before they get to the grassland and wipe out my herd.
First thing tomorrow morning, l want you to you ship them and every other horse we got out of here.
And find them yahoos.
Well, Bus, we've checked every hotel there is in Lodi and l got a man watching the reservation.
But lf they're just camping out someplace we're talking about hundreds of thousands of acres.
Then use the chopper.
Do whatever you gotta do, but find them.
Morning, Miss Lane.
l wouldn't have thought you'd be up this early.
-l heard you talking.
-Just some business problems.
[Hannibal whistles.]
HANNlBAL: l don't mind if l do.
Who the devil are you? What are you doing here? You'll find out.
This is a stupid move.
You yahoos are crazy to come back here.
l agree.
l told you it was crazy.
He never listens.
We're here to file a grievance against the Carter Railway Line for the Wild Horses of America, Western Divisions.
Not to be confused with the Horses' Butts of America of which we hear you are a member of long standing.
And we would deeply appreciate it if you would stop harassing our dues-paying loyal membership which includes all the wild mustangs that run in this free land.
Both of you are dead.
No, wait, you don't seem to get the point here.
We're the ones making the threats and you better believe us.
We hear so much as a neigh from one of those mustangs out there we'll be back to hogtie and brand you for good.
Now you get all of your papers out of your safe that have to do with the slaughter-house you do business with in Mexico.
Now.
Bingo.
Puppy Love Dog Food Company in Ensenada.
-Great shot.
-Yeah.
Get out of here! Hold your fire! Don't shoot! lt's awfully kind of Miss Carter to escort us out.
HANNlBAL: Tell them.
All right, l want all you high school dropouts to count to 1 25 before you even twitch.
Get them.
[Tense instrumental music.]
Move it! [Peaceful instrumental music.]
What do you say, Murdock? Anyone sniffing around? Daniel and Shelly dropped by with some grub.
They're still here.
Otherwise, it's been real quiet.
FACE: Yeah, l'll bet it is, especially without Thunder to keep you company.
And B.
A.
said something awful to Ed, and now he ain't talking to nobody.
MURDOCK: Colonel, what about this bush business? l'm done with it, you hear me? Not exactly coming naturally, is it? lt's like anything else, Amy.
lt takes some practise and a little technique.
A lot like driving a golf ball or shooting skeet.
Come on.
Okay, bring it up.
Straighten this arm and crook your elbow.
Very nice.
AMY: Boy, the well is never dry with you, is it, Face? lf l had pulled that ''let me show you how to aim that thing'' routine you'd never let me hear the end of it.
l caught the act as l rode up.
So, how's the arm, Danny? FeeIing better, is it? l'd like to introduce our guest.
This is Miss Carter.
-Bus Carter's niece? -That's right.
Just how long do you think you can get away with this? -With what? -Holding me against my will.
We're not holding you against your will.
We just borrowed you.
HANNlBAL: You're free to go anytime.
LANE: You kidnapped me.
That was just to keep from being dropped in a deep hole on Bus Carter's north 40.
We're not the criminals around here.
We will let the law decide that.
l don't think your Uncle would want to bring the law in on this.
They might investigate too deeply and find out that he's been rounding up wild mustangs and selling them illegally.
LANE: My uncle? B.
A.
: That's right, your uncle.
They round up the horses, then ship them by train to a dog food company in Mexico.
lt'd make real interesting reading for Amy's subscribers.
l see you got yourself some new arrows there.
Kid, listen, l just brought one jacket, so.
l tried to convince myself it was Stryker.
l even went to Uncle Bus.
l guess l believed he was involved all along.
You just walk up that way north, you should come across your uncle's men by dawn.
We'd give you a horse to ride, but then one of us would be on foot.
So, happy trails.
Aren't you afraid l'll tell him where your camp is, or what you look like? By that time, we'll have struck camp and be long gone.
HANNlBAL: As for what we look like l don't plan on sticking around long enough to get picked out of a line-up.
Wait.
l think l heard my uncle saying that there's still more horses to be shipped out and that Stryker should get that done first thing.
Adiós.
MURDOCK: [Singing.]
I'm an oId cowhand From the Rio Grande And I Iearned to ride before I Iearned to stand B.
A.
: lf you don't shut up, l'll knock you off that horse! Yippy-l-O-Ki-Ay.
Murdock, why don't you take rearguard in case one of Carter's men picks up our trail? Carter knows we have all the proof we need to shut him down right here.
Has to figure we're gonna head for the hills.
We are heading for the hills, aren't we, Hannibal? l don't know.
lt's gonna take a couple of days for Amy to file that story and get an investigation started.
Carter's niece did say there's another shipment of mustangs -going out tomorrow morning.
-Hannibal, come on.
Hitting this guy's train twice in a row.
That's kind of pushing it, isn't it? A lot.
That's why we gotta get some stuff together to keep him from pushing back too hard.
Carter's no idiot.
He has to figure that us making another run on his train so soon it's insane.
He'll never be ready for us.
No, l don't think he'll ever be ready for us.
You think he'll be ready for us? -Yeah, l do.
-So do l.
Better sharpen your pencil and your spurs, Face.
You know, we're only one step ahead of Decker, too.
-Don't worry, l've considered that.
-Of course you have.
[Laughing.]
l think he's going to be big problems.
Colonel, they're here.
DECKER: They sure are.
DECKER: Apparently they mixed it up with a couple of locals right here yesterday.
No one seems to know what it's about, but knowing Hannibal Smith and his men they've probably took on some bleeding-heart cause or other.
No doubt requested by Daniel Running Bear.
The shop-keeper said they picked up some camping gear and other supplies so they're out there somewhere.
lt could take forever to find three people camping on the open range.
We'll track them down through Daniel Running Bear.
Let's go see the sheriff and find out exactly where we can find Running Bear.
Once we've found him, l'm sure the A-Team won't be far away.
Come on, Amy, l could use the help.
l'm sure you could, but l'm through being suckered by you.
lt's just a straight little scam.
lt'll go down easy, and it'll get us everything Hannibal wants.
Come on.
Pretty please? Pretty? See, the brother-sister act will work great for this.
Face, what was in the grease? -l told you.
-No, you didn't tell me.
l can still smell it.
Well, it had a little of this.
And a little of that.
l know, you told me that.
But that's not enough, Face.
-Come on, Amy.
What do you say? -Sorry, Face.
lf l told you what was in that stuff, l'm sure you wouldn't help.
What? Never mind.
l'll do it on my own.
Go and check with the office.
l'll meet you back here in a bit.
Colonel, it's Peck! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
[Car horn honking.]
[Dog growling.]
Can l try one of these on? Thanks.
Where did he go? DECKER: Sorry, ma'am.
That's the second time he's done that to me.
Thanks.
l really appreciate your trusting me like that.
Let's just say l liked your face.
Do l have an honest face? No.
But l like it.
[Amusing instrumental music.]
Get on the horn, Crane, and get me the 10 best men available.
CRANE: Best men, sir? DECKER: l'm talking about the best marksmen that can be rounded up and flown in here before the day is out.
Yes, sir.
At least we got them located.
We know they're still here.
They're still here.
And this is gonna be the A-Team's Waterloo.
[lntense instrumental music.]
You gotta be kidding.
Carter's gonna be ready for us.
We need a real hole card.
Considering Decker's presence puts a damper on most possible sources of supplies, l think l did rather well.
Look at it as a challenge, B.
A.
Face, l wanted an all-terrain vehicle.
FACE: The important thing to remember is we need something that can cover the same ground as a train.
The only thing this thing gonna cover is the corner of a junkyard.
Mr.
Ed could teach you how to fix it, B.
A.
Only he's not gonna.
Well, B.
A.
, what do you think? Oh, Hannibal.
HANNlBAL: How did l know you were gonna say that? [Adventurous instrumental music.]
[Adventurous instrumental music continues.]
lt was right around here somewhere, wasn't it, Wesley? Just up past that bend.
You don't think they'd hit us twice, do you? l mean, two days in a row? Yeah? What's that? Here they come.
Right on schedule.
Don't look like they're slowing down, man.
They'll slow down.
They have to.
You keep a full head of steam.
-Are you crazy? -l said just keep going.
Son of a gun.
They're not slowing down.
[Wheels screeching.]
All right, back this thing up, hurry! All right, turn those mustangs loose or start singing Empty SaddIes.
HANNlBAL: B.
A.
, bring her back! HANNlBAL: Forward, B.
A.
! [Fast-paced instrumental music.]
All right, last chance.
Drop your guns.
Don't be shy.
Come on! Go, B.
A.
[Face exclaiming warningly.]
No sneaking up from behind.
Drop it.
HANNlBAL: All right, open them up.
You heard the man.
Open it up.
[Horses neighing.]
Let's go, B.
A.
Come on, Face! Let's get out of here! [Fast-paced instrumental music continues.]
Thanks for waiting.
You better step on it.
-l'm going as fast as l can! -Right.
l love it when a plan comes together.
We're gonna have to replace these pieces of rail, it's the only way.
You guys sure do know how to make a nuisance of yourselves, don't you? We do our best.
All right, let's get to work.
Grab a length of that track and move it over here so we can back this train off the spur.
-That's gonna take some time.
-Let's get moving, then! Last thing we need is this train full of horses just sitting.
Mr.
Carter wants them out of here.
Let's do it! We'd offer to help, but.
Skipper, you take a ride with me.
l'm sure Mr.
Carter wants to have a few words with you.
That's fine.
l got a few words for him.
Throw these other two in the caboose.
We'll take care of them on down the line.
-Hang in there.
-Yeah, right.
Don't hold your breath.
There ain't no cavalry in this picture.
You keep thinking that.
[Military instrumental music.]
l'm gonna stick with Hannibal.
You guys go get some help.
[Heroic instrumental music.]
Where did he learn how to do that? Just like the real Range Rider.
CARTER: lf it ain't old Buffalo Bill himself.
lt wouldn't do me any good to call you names 'cause l can't imagine any name you haven't been called before.
You're a lucky man you didn't harm my niece.
Because of that, l'm not gonna make you die slow.
How long will it be before that train's ready to roll? l told them to just keep on humping.
Absolutely.
l mean the last thing you need is to get caught with a boxcar full of stolen mustangs attached to your own train.
You tell Jesse to fire up the bird.
l'm gonna shoot out there with you, see those guys don't mess up.
CARTER: No telling who else these yahoos called in.
l want that train over the border into Mexico.
What about him? Fertilise the south 40 with him.
Have a nice day.
l need a distraction.
l want you to count to three.
No.
Count to five real slow and then scream for all you're worth.
LANE: [Screaming.]
Fire! Help, the stable's on fire! [Triumphant instrumental music.]
[Horse neighing.]
Lane, give me my knife and my gun.
Were they really going to kill you? l think that was the general idea.
-What about the others? -Right where we left them.
l figured they weren't going anywhere.
Besides, l had to come for you.
Good idea.
Let's go.
Take care of Whacko for me.
HANNlBAL: That's Waco, Murdock.
MURDOCK: Waco.
CARTER: After you get those horses to Mexico, go find that lndian.
Make sure he don't hire any more heIp.
The sheriff? l thought those guys were wanted.
l think we should try to swing by the reservation.
Maybe we can pick up a bunch of the guys who'll help.
And if not, then we'd be wasting time.
l wanna head straight for the sheriff's.
AMY: My worry is keeping those guys from being killed.
Hannibal can always find a way to escape.
That sounds like the way Hannibal would think.
Holy.
DECKER: How lucky for me, running into you like this.
l don't understand.
DECKER: You are Daniel Running Bear, aren't you? Why do you ask? Your license plate.
And l have a description of this vehicle.
l'm Col.
Decker of the U.
S.
Army.
I've been trying to reach you at home aII day.
DECKER: l finally decided to drive up to speak with you.
Good thing, too, or we might have missed each other again.
l have a lot of important things to take care of-- So do l.
l want to know where the A-Team is.
-The A-Team? -Yes.
l'm sure you can tell me.
lf not, l feel certain Miss Allen can.
And l'm prepared to stand here all week.
CARTER: l hope you yahoos enjoy your little trip, courtesy Carter Railways.
Unfortunately, though, there ain't no return tickets.
l've always wanted to see the country by rail.
[Train horn blowing.]
Get rid of them guys.
We don't want any outlaw witnesses on board.
STRYKER: All right, the rest of you head on back.
Let's get some work done.
STRYKER: We've still got some steers need branding.
And when you get across the border, adiós, yahoos.
[Suspenseful instrumental music.]
[Suspenseful instrumental music intensifies.]
Go! [Horn blowing.]
Will you hold still? You're gonna rub me raw with these little ropes.
l ain't moving, it's the train moving.
Boy, that's great.
That's just what we need, an Abbott and Costello routine.
DRlVER: Where are you going? STRYKER: You don't stop, no matter what.
You got that? [Gripping instrumental music.]
Boy, you must be getting real weak.
You can't break these puny little ropes.
[B.
A.
grunting.]
l was just kidding.
B.
A.
, grab that brake wheel.
We gotta stop this train.
[Wheels screeching.]
Coming to the border.
lf those mustangs get into Mexico, we got no evidence.
Good job, B.
A.
There's Murdock.
-B.
A.
? -Nighty-night.
HANNlBAL: Face, take my hat for a minute.
FACE: Sure.
B.
A.
, give me your hand.
[B.
A.
grunts.]
Hannibal, we got a bogey at 1 1 :00.
MURDOCK: Come on.
Adiós, bonanza.
Hannibal, come on, let's go! HANNlBAL: He's not close enough! FACE: What? Are you crazy? HANNlBAL: l wouldn't sleep at all tonight if he didn't see the expression on my face.
MURDOCK: Time's a-wasting, partner.
So long, pal.
[Adventurous instrumental music.]
-Told you he'd do it.
-That's right.
l think there's something real interesting you'd like to know about that train.
lt's used to move out wild mustangs off the reservation illegally.
And l think this gentleman has a lot to answer for.
l do believe that's a federal offence, isn't it, Colonel? Yes, ma'am, it is.
Next time, Hannibal Smith.
Next time.
[Triumphant instrumental music.]
[Cheerful instrumental music.]
Look at them.
lt's like they know they aren't being hunted anymore.
How great to be free.
We gotta get going before Decker finds out we never left the county.
You know, even though he doesn't have anything positive on me you can bet he'll probably have me under constant surveillance when l get home.
So l thought maybe l'd stay here a while.
-Gather a little background material? -Something like that.
Then if Amy'll loan us her car, l guess we can give you a ride to Phoenix Airport.
Great.
Here, B.
A.
That's so you can show them to the kids in your class.
Help them understand better so they can make one.
Thanks, little brother.
l'm sure the kids at my daycare centre will love the gift.
-Okay.
-So long.
Daniel, will you say goodbye to Ed for me? And will you tell him that if he ever needs me if he ever feels the need to talk to anyone that l'll always lend an ear? Good.
'Cause you ain't got no brains.
Sure, Murdock.
[Valiant instrumental music.]
They really did it.
They always do.
Here, buckaroo.
Hey, he forgot his mask.
No, he didn't forget his mask.
He just left it behind because his job here is done.
[Peaceful country song.]
[Theme music.]