The New Scooby-Doo Movies (1972) s02e05 Episode Script

Today, Don Adams joins
Scooby and the gang.
Wow, aren't these homes in Hollywood
something else?
Yeah. lt was worth the trip
to see them.
Look. There's Gregory Grant's home.
-Way out.
-lt must cost zillions.
-That mansion belongs to Steve McKing.
-What a pad.
-Man, movie stars sure live in luxury.
-Yeah.
And to think that
some of those stars. . .
. . .were discovered
working in a gas station.
Really?
-Scooby. Hey, Scoob.
-Where are you going?
-Fill her up?
-Will you forget it, Scoob?
-You gotta have talent to be discovered.
-Talent?
Don't take it too hard, Scooby.
Everybody can't be a movie star.
Let's face it, Scoob. We'll never get to
see the inside of one of those mansions.
Who cares?
Poor Scooby.
l hope it didn't break his heart.
Didn't seem to break his teeth.
Pass the Scooby Snacks.
Say, there's someone in trouble.
Sir, do you need help?
Me need help? That's ridiculous.
l can fix anything with four wheels.
This truck doesn't count.
With a spare, it has five wheels.
Hey, gang. Look who it is.
-Jinkies. lt's the famous Don Adams.
-You're right.
lt is Don Adams.
Now head of the Adams
Exterminator Company.
Bug killer to the stars. My card.
-Like, this card is full of holes.
-A moth.
He'll never terrorize
another business card again.
Got him.
That'll teach you not to fool with
the fastest exterminator in the west.
Now if l could only get the bugs
out of my motor.
-What's the matter with it?
-Termites.
-You've got termites in your motor?
-That's right.
l ran a termite out of town,
and his brothers swore to get even.
-lt looks like they did.
-Now what am l gonna do?
No car, and l'm due to exterminate
a movie star's home in 1 0 minutes.
This is all very well and good. . .
. . .but l got to get to that
movie star's home.
-We'll take you there.
-lf you'd like.
-Sure, we'd like to help.
-Thanks. My equipment's in the van.
l'll take care of you punks later.
Wow, there's enough equipment here
to fight an army of insects.
ln this game, you never know
when you might be ambushed. . .
. . .by a platoon of soldier ants.
Soldier ants?
He thinks he's in the Army.
That's because he heard soldiers
are called ''dogfaces. ''
Charge!
-Looks like he's engaged the enemy.
-You mean enraged the enemy.
Soldier ants.
Next time, pick on somebody weaker,
like soldier uncles.
Right on, Velma.
l'm very grateful for this.
To whom am l indebted?
l'm Freddy,
and this is Daphne and Velma.
-Hello.
-Howdy.
-l'm Shaggy, and this is Scooby-Doo.
-How do you do, Scooby?
-Hello.
-Hold it. Don't move a muscle.
l think l feel a flea.
No charge. The flea is on me.
-And now it's on me.
-Sorry about that.
l think l was better off with the flea.
-How much further to that star's house?
-lt's just up the road.
Gee, l wish l could see the inside
of a movie star's home.
-Oh, so do l.
-Yeah, me too.
You would? Tell you what, kids,
how'd you like to be my assistants?
-Your assistants?
-Sure.
Gee, thanks.
Don't thank me.
You'll be doing me a favor.
My three regular assistants
just quit on me.
How could they quit
a groovy job like this?
Pull up. There's the house.
That's the house?
No wonder they quit.
That's Horror Hill.
The home of the old horror-film star
Lorne Chumly.
Yep. That's why my other
three assistants quit.
They refused to go inside.
Hey, Shag, give me a hand
with this equipment.
-Oh, no. Not me.
-What's the matter?
l got news for you.
A fourth assistant just quit.
-And a fifth.
-Oh, come, now.
-Surely you don't believe that silly rumor.
-What rumor?
Yeah. What rumor?
That 1 4 exterminators have entered
that house. . .
. . .and no one has heard a word
from any of them since.
-That does it.
-lt sure does.
-You can't quit on Mr. Adams now.
-We gave him our word.
And it may be the last word
anyone hears from us too.
Yeah.
-Come on, Shag.
-l don't like the looks of this place.
lt's just an old-fashioned house.
lt gives me old-fashioned
goose pimples.
-lt gives me the creeps.
-Yeah. lt's kind of scary.
That's because it looks like the house
in one of his horror movies:
-Strangers, Beware.
-Strangers, Beware?
Yeah. That's a movie he made.
lt won a whole bunch of Oscars.
l just got a whole bunch of willies.
Hey, do you wanna hear the story?
lt's really super.
No, thanks.
lt opened up with a group
of unsuspecting strangers, just like us. . .
. . .going up an eerie path,
just like this.
Velma, please. l don't wanna hear it.
Neither do l.
Besides, you might scare Scooby.
They were headed towards
a gloomy, spooky house. . .
. . .unaware of the dangers
that lurked ahead.
-Velma, will you stop?
-Yeah, cut it out, Velma.
What are you frightened of?
lt was only a silent movie.
Well, if the movie was silent,
why can't you be?
l don't think l'm going to go in there.
No, sir, not me. l'm not going in there.
What's the matter?
Did you see the movie too?
No, but l saw that house.
-And that's enough for me.
-Yeah. Me too.
Just look at that rotted old door.
That house must be full of insects.
-What bug is buggy enough to live there?
-l don't know.
Hold it.
-What is it?
-Under those steps.
Subterranean ants.
-ls that all?
-That's enough.
You don't know those monsters.
Today the steps, tomorrow the roof.
Hand me a bug bomb.
lf l'm not back in five minutes,
give this letter to my mother.
Mr. Adams certainly
takes his work seriously.
Mr. Adams?
Are you all right?
Quickly, let's get inside
before they regroup and attack.
-There's another serious problem. Bats.
-l'm not surprised.
Anybody who lives here
would have to have bats in his belfry.
Yes?
All he said was ''yes,''
and already l'm scared.
l'm Don Adams of the
Adams Exterminating Company.
-My card.
-Waldo, the calling-card tray.
There's an invisible man
holding that tray.
A cheap Hollywood trick.
-No one can make himself invisible.
-No? Watch me.
And me.
l think l prefer that house to yours.
Mr. Chumly does not wish
exterminators on his property.
-That's okay with us. Right, Mr. Adams?
-l'm afraid not, Shaggy.
A bank's selling the house. l have to
exterminate before it can be sold.
So you insist, do you?
Very well. Come in.
-Hey, Freddy, hold it.
-What is it, Shag? What's wrong?
-l got something to say.
-Yeah? What is it?
l don't think we should go inside.
-Why not?
-lt's that butler.
-What about him?
-He did something that worries me.
All he did was invite us into the house.
-That's what worries me.
-Yeah. Me too.
You two are getting upset
over nothing.
The guy's a little creepy-looking,
but l'm sure he's harmless.
-After all, he's only the butler.
-Well, in those horror movies. . .
. . .it's always the butler who did it.
Did--? Did what?
l don't know, but whatever they did do
might be done to us.
-Let's get out of here.
-Good idea, Scoob. Let's split.
Now, take it easy, Shag.
You're letting your imagination run away.
-l wish you'd let me do the same.
-Now, cut it out, and let's go inside.
My name is Otto.
l am Mr. Chumly's butler. Follow me.
Just a minute.
l'm the head of this company.
l'll give the orders. Let's follow him.
Wow, we're finally inside
a real movie star's home.
One of the most famous stars of all. . .
. . .Lorne Chumly,
of the old silent horror films.
What's that?
The door. The door.
-What about the door?
-lt sh--
-Speak up, soldier. What did it do?
-You tell him, Scoob.
Shut by itself? Well, no cause for alarm.
There's probably a good explanation.
-Like what?
-lt must have been termites.
-Termites?
-What kind of termites slam doors?
Very rude ones.
Keep your eyes peeled for another way
out of this place.
They're peeled. They're peeled.
-Come on, guys. Quit lagging behind.
-Sure, sure. We'll be right with you.
l'm just tying my laces
on my track shoes.
On your mark, get set, go.
Wait for me.
-There goes Chicken Little.
-Followed by Chicken Big.
They must not roam through this house
by themselves.
There are too many dangers
lurking in these old rooms.
Dangers? What sort of dangers?
l dare not say.
They're too unspeakable.
You can tell us. We're unspookable.
Spook for yourself--
Speak for yourself, Velma.
l'm beginning to think Shaggy
and Scooby have the right idea.
-Come on. We've got to find them.
-Yoo-hoo. Shaggy. Scooby.
l wonder which way is out of here.
Oh, thanks.
lt's a dead end.
Dead end?
Sorry about that, Scoob.
Maybe there's another exit
behind this drape, Scoob.
l hope so.
-l'll look here. You look underneath.
-Right.
-Yoo-hoo. Shaggy. Scooby.
-Where are you?
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
There's not a sign of them anywhere.
l warned them not to get separated.
Now it may be too late.
Look. Something's moving behind
that drape. l wonder what it is.
We'll soon find out.
-Are you okay, Scoob?
-Terrific.
Enough clowning. This is not
a fun house. lt's a shrine.
A shrine to the artistic brilliance
of my employer, Lorne Chumly. . .
. . .master of a thousand
frightening disguises.
Who are they?
They are all pictures of the great Lorne
Chumly in his most frightening roles.
He was known as
''the man with a million faces. ''
Also a million termites.
Let's get started, kids.
You check the equipment,
l'll look for bugs.
Right, Mr. Adams.
Do you think we'll get to meet
Mr. Chumly?
No. He is not at home today.
Like, that's the best break
we've had all day.
That crack in the wall.
lt's quiet. Too quiet.
l am giving you all one last warning.
Strangers are not welcome
in this house.
l cannot be responsible for
the consequences if you stay.
-Did you hear what he said, Mr. Adams?
-Threats don't scare me.
-Well, they sure work with me.
-And me.
l'm not leaving until l exterminate
every inch of this house.
-l gave the bank my word.
-And we gave you ours.
-That's right.
-Thanks, kids. You'll get half my pay.
The bank's paying me 1 0 cents a bug.
-Jinkies.
-That's very generous of you.
Thank you.
Bugs, 3 o'clock high.
All right, you cowards,
l know you're in there.
And l'll give you one second
to surrender.
The lights went off!
Oh, calm down, you two.
One of us must have brushed
against the switch.
Let's feel around for it.
-What is it, Mr. Adams?
-Are you okay?
l found the switch.
Those bugs pulverized my watch.
Tricky little devils.
Very well. lf that's the way you want it,
l'm coming in after you.
Got them. That's 60 cents.
Wow, that's fast money.
-Let's get to work.
-Right.
Okay, Freddy, you and the girls spritz
upstairs. And we'll spritz the downstairs.
Come on, girls.
-You take that room while l work in here.
-Let's go, Scoob.
Wow, there's plenty of places
for bugs to hide in this setup.
-Let's check this suit of armor for moths.
-Moths?
Sure. You've heard
of the iron butterfly, right?
-So maybe they've also got iron moths.
-Oh, brother.
Enough grousing. Let's start delousing.
Something's got me.
Hey! Let go!
-Quick, Scooby. The spray.
-Right.
Did you just see what l just saw?
Please say no.
-Yes.
-Some pal you are.
He forgot his head.
-That's a load off my shoulders.
-Yeah.
And onto mine.
Sorry about that, Scoob.
This room looks pretty safe.
Nothing in here but a battered old organ.
lt's full of wormholes.
We'd better spray it.
Look. lt's playing itself.
lt's pumping itself.
l think we'll let it spray itself.
Mr. Adams! Mr. Adams!
A platoon of wall weevils.
Cover me while l sneak up on them.
Keep your eyes on them.
They can be tricky.
Yeah.
Quiet, Scoob.
That's better. lf you wanna be useful,
help hold this tank, Scoob.
lt's getting heavy. Thanks, Scoob.
This calls for the big guns.
Bring up the tank.
Right.
Let's go, Scoob.
Scooby, will you--?
Hey, hold it down, you guys.
You wanna wake every weevil
in the wall?
Mr. Adams?
He's gone.
That wall was so rotted
it must have given way.
There must be another way
back into that room.
What do you say we get
out of this place?
l say yeah, yeah.
Maybe this door leads outside.
lt's a corridor.
-Sure is spooky in there.
-Spooky.
-Did you have to say it like that?
-Spooky.
-That's even worse.
-Spooky. Spooky, spooky.
Forget it.
lt's either the corridor or the hallway.
Which way should we go?
-l don't know.
-l'll flip a coin.
Heads, we go in there,
and tails, we go back there.
We go in there.
-Well, is it working?
-All is going according to plan.
A few more spooky happenings. . .
. . .and they will abandon this house
like frightened rabbits.
Good. Good. Very good.
And then we can proceed with
our master plan uninterrupted.
Listen. What's that?
ln which architectural location shall we
commence our antilepidopteran activities?
-How's that again?
-She said:
''Where do you think we ought
to start debugging?''
Well, one room's
just like another to me.
lt's those kids,
and they're headed this way.
We had best disappear.
-All right, let's start with this room.
-Okay.
Wait a minute. lt says here,
''Spray may be irritating to skin.
Wear protective covering. ''
There's some clothes in this bag.
We better put them on.
Okay, let's go to work.
We'll start on that wall.
This is a small room.
We'll get it done in no time.
-lt won't take long with the four of us.
-Yeah.
-Right.
-Four of us?
What are you so nervous for, Daphne?
lt's probably Mr. Adams.
-Or Shaggy.
-Oh, l guess you're right.
-Mr. Adams?
-Shaggy?
-Sounds like Scooby.
-We'll soon find out.
Hey, look, a Scooby Snack.
He didn't even blink.
lt can't be Scooby.
-Who could it be?
-lt must be another exterminator.
lt better be another exterminator.
Now we'll clear up this mystery.
He's gone.
So is our equipment.
There's something strange
going on here.
We'd better tell Mr. Adams.
Whoever you are, this room is yours
at 1 0 cents a bug.
There's no telling what's in this corridor,
Scoob. Stick close to me.
Not that close, Scoob.
What was that?
-l know how it sounded. What was it?
-Beats me.
lt sounded like it came
from over there, Scoob.
Go over there and see what it was.
l'm coming. l'm right behind you.
Go on. l'll stay back here so nobody
will sneak up on you from behind.
Oh, no. You go first.
Tell you what, Scoob,
l'll choose you to see who goes first.
-Odd or even?
-Even.
Okay, l got odd.
Four fingers. That's even.
Three arms are odd.
But odd or even, l go first.
Footsteps.
What'll we do?
We can't go back to those paintings.
lt's Mr. Adams.
Spraying the ceiling?
Where's your tank?
Which reminds me, where's my tank?
Something took them.
This house is haunted.
Haunted? Who believes
in haunted houses?
-l do.
-And Scooby-Doo do too.
lt's just your imagination.
Freddy and the girls probably
borrowed them.
Maybe they're in here.
-lt's stuck.
-Let's try another door.
ln another house.
Don't worry, l'll kick it open.
l have a black belt in karate.
Would you believe a chartreuse belt?
The door's opening.
Naturally. lt's afraid
l was going to kick it again.
lt's an indoor swimming pool.
Now, that's what l call class.
This could be the breakthrough
we've hoped for.
l think we've stumbled on. . .
. . .the headquarters for the enemy's
amphibious operations.
-Amphibious?
-Operations?
Certainly. Haven't you ever heard
of water bugs?
This is obviously
their secret training camp.
Someone hand me a magnifying glass.
-Thanks, Scooby.
-You're welcome.
''Thanks, Scooby''?
Scoob, will you cut that out?
-You're not a cat.
-l am too.
A fraidy-cat.
Just as l suspected.
Diving-board termites.
Help.
Hang on, Scoob.
Just keep dog paddling.
A perfect ringer.
Just like pitching a horseshoe.
Help. Help.
lt's also sinking just like a horseshoe.
This case goes even deeper
than l thought.
Yeah. About 9 feet.
-There's one of the enemy now.
-What is it?
A Stereopticus myodoptera. . .
. . .more commonly known
as the squirt bug.
l wonder why they call it a squirt bug.
-Does that answer your question?
-Perfectly.
l told you they were tricky little devils.
Now, hand me a towel.
-Thanks, Shaggy.
-You're welcome.
''Thanks, Shaggy''?
Really, couldn't you wait
till we're on our break?
Mr. Adams, l just
remembered something.
Just a moment, Shaggy.
Business before pleasure.
Got him.
Fifteen-hundred hours, 32 minutes.
Sighted bug, sank same.
All right, Shaggy,
what was it you just remembered?
That l can't swim.
Me either.
Well, that's a horse of another color.
Pink with yellow polka dots.
Here, catch.
-Gee, thanks.
-Yeah, thanks.
-Hey, he threw it to me.
-He did not.
-Let go. lt's mine, Scoob.
-lt's mine.
Help!
Let me out of here. Open the door.
The walls have ears.
And the lockers have monsters.
Monsters, you say?
Why, that's ridiculous.
Ridiculous, huh? See for yourself.
All right, l will.
l suppose you call that
a frightening monster.
l sure do.
Well, that shows what you know.
lt happens to be a terrifying monster.
Company, retreat.
Hey. Wait for me.
And me.
l wonder why they took off like that.
And before we had a chance to tell them
about the secret passageway we found.
Well, you never know what'll frighten
Shaggy and Scooby.
l wonder what's behind this door.
l don't care.
As long as it's not lockers.
-Right.
-Let's take a peek inside, shall we?
lt's a projection room
for showing movies.
-Lots of Hollywood homes have them.
-Like, wow.
He's even got his own
private popcorn machine.
Yep. And if he wants to see a movie,
all he has to do is press a button.
What's that?
Just making shadowgrams.
lt'll help you recognize the enemy.
Watch this one.
That's the creeping carpet moth.
And here. . .
. . .we have the female chinch bug.
You can recognize the female. . .
. . .because she never puts her hand out
before turning.
Little exterminator humor there.
That's a bedbug.
That's a bedbug for king-size beds.
Now, what's that one, Mr. Adams?
l don't know. l'm not doing it.
Hi, Mr. Adams.
We've been looking all over for you.
Do you have to go around dressed
like that, scaring people?
And dogs?
-What's up, kids?
-Plenty.
There's another exterminator
in the house.
-What?
-But he disappeared into thin air.
-Thin air?
-And so did our tanks.
See? See, what did l tell you?
-The house is haunted.
-Sure is.
l think Shag and Scooby are right.
The house isn't haunted.
l'm sure there's a logical explanation.
-Like what?
-Like the house is haunted.
Well, l don't think so.
-Neither do l.
-l do.
-So do l.
-Me too.
-Oh, you're a bunch of scaredy-cats.
-No, you guys are wrong.
Hold it, kids. Hold it.
We'll decide by vote.
All those who think the house
is not haunted, raise their hands.
One, two, three.
Okay.
Now, all those who think
the house is haunted, raise their hands.
One, two. . .
. . .three. . .
. . .four. Four?
Hold everything.
There's one extra hand.
And it's a vote for our side.
The house is haunted.
l love popcorn, but not this much.
Come on.
Me neither. l'm pooped from
being popped. Let's get out of here.
Bats!
Don't tangle with me.
l happen to be an exterminator.
My card.
Wise guy, eh?
Just wait till l find my tank.
l'll remember your face.
Hey, kids, a door.
lt's an elevator.
l wonder where it leads to.
l don't. l'm getting out.
lt's moving.
l wonder where this elevator's
going to stop.
l've got a feeling
it isn't Ladies' Lingerie.
We'll soon be rid of them, won't we?
Second floor. Spooks, ghouls, ghosts,
things that go bump in the night.
Please, Mr. Adams,
you're upsetting Scooby.
Sorry, Scooby. l was trying
to lighten everyone's spirits.
Spirits?
lt's all right, Shaggy. lt just stopped.
So did my heart.
Will you knock it off, Scoob?
lt was just an expression.
Hey, kids, look.
lt's Lorne Chumly's
theatrical storeroom.
Yeah. Look at all that stuff.
Old costumes, theatrical trunks, wigs.
And our equipment.
l wonder who put it there.
Let's investigate.
Maybe we can find out.
l'm not going into that spooky place.
l'm staying right here in the elevator.
Going up?
Going out.
Correction:
Passing out.
Empty.
No time to rest now, Scooby.
Somebody emptied these tanks.
Well, why would anybody do that?
My guess is, someone doesn't want us
to exterminate this house.
-Yeah, me.
-Let's split.
l'd like to, Scooby,
but l have my duty to the bank.
l'll exterminate this house if l have to
take on every termite one by one.
Mr. Adams!
Something pulled him
through that clothes rack.
-Yes, but what?
-Let's take a look.
Hey, get me out of this thing.
-He's in that trunk.
-And it's floating away.
Trunks don't float.
Something must be moving it.
-l wonder what.
-Or who.
Bats were moving it.
Quick, get Mr. Adams out.
l can't. lt's locked shut.
Just be patient, Mr. Adams.
We'll get you out.
This old house key might open it.
lt's worth a try.
We'll have to figure out another way.
He's too ticklish.
Step aside for the trustiest
trunk opener in the world.
-A hairpin?
-What else?
-lt worked.
-Chalk up another one for women's lib.
Are you all right, Mr. Adams?
Certainly.
l either fell into a mask,
or l forgot to shave this month.
That's it. Give me more emotion.
More. More.
Brilliant, Mr. Chumly. Brilliant.
That was one of the best things
you ever did.
Do you really think so, Otto?
The entire scene was
a small masterpiece.
Finally, Otto, l'm prepared
to make my comeback.
Once again, the world will cheer
and shudder and swoon. . .
. . .at the talents
of the immortal Lorne Chumly.
What's that?
Your trained bats delivering another
trunk full of costumes, Mr. Chumly.
l must have silence.
We must complete this movie
before the bank sells my home.
Now, on with the scene.
Very well. l will turn on
the wind machine.
lt's only me, Scoob.
You call that wind?
l need a hurricane.
lt's supposed to be raining
cats and dogs.
lt is.
Stop shouting in our faces.
Get this pussycat off me.
Someone turn off that hurricane.
You mean this hurricane?
-lt's Otto.
-And a monster.
Not quite, kids.
Actually, it's Otto and Lorne Chumly.
Lorne Chumly himself?
Not exactly.
You forget, he's the man
with a million faces.
That's Lorne Chumly?
Wrong again.
That's Lorne Chumly.
Not yet.
So that's Lorne Chumly.
You miss again.
Sorry about that.
l guess it finally is Lorne Chumly.
Wow, he really is the man
with a million faces.
And a million debts.
That's why the bank
is selling this house.
But l couldn't allow it to be sold
until l finished filming my movie here.
-lt's the perfect setting for a horror film.
-l'll buy that.
Once the Hollywood bigwigs
see me in this film. . .
. . .they'll realize that the immortal Lorne
Chumly is ready to make his comeback.
But why all the
Halloween hocus-pocus?
The house couldn't be sold
until it was exterminated.
That's why he tried to frighten us away
with trick costumes and trained bats.
-Precisely.
-You've discovered my secret.
Now l'll never complete my movie.
And it would have meant
a brilliant new career for Mr. Chumly.
Gosh, too bad you can't finish
making the movie by tomorrow.
l could, if l had people to help me.
We'd be glad to help you,
wouldn't we, gang?
-Right.
-Of course we would.
-l'd love it.
-Right.
Good thinking, kids.
You can finish the movie. . .
. . .while l finish exterminating.
Ready for take one.
Ready for take one.
Ready for take one.
Take one.
Wait, where's my wig?
Here it is, Mr. Chumly.
Hold it. l think l saw a termite
hiding in that wig.
He got away. Now, where did he go?
-Search me.
-Hold it.
SDl Media Group
[ENGLlSH]