The Problem with Jon Stewart (2021) s02e05 Episode Script

[audience applauding, cheering]
Hello!
Welcome to the program.
My name is Jon Stewart.
And, man,
there's a lot going on in the world.
There's Fascism on the march in Italy.
North Korea lobbing missiles over Japan.
F-From what I understand,
people in Europe are very nervous
about what's going on in Russia.
[audience laughing]
Apparently Ukraine wants to join NATO,
and they don't know where to turn
I don't know what to tell you.
[audience laughs]
But, I'm--
I'm sure them joining NATO is okay, right?
If Ukraine joins NATO,
that means world war.
Millions die.
[audience laughing]
Okay. So things are good.
But speaking of international conflict,
tonight, oddly enough,
we return to Afghanistan.
I'm sorry to say, you've been drafted.
No, I'm just kidding about that.
As you know,
we were in Afghanistan for 20 years.
But we were only there to kill Bin Laden,
which we did.
In Pakistan.
But of course, we stayed in Afghanistan
for ten more years
because we had already paid for parking.
Not to worry!
-[audience laughing]
Our two decades in Afghanistan were long,
but they were not lonely.
We rode into Operation Enduring Freedom
42 allied countries strong,
each contributing to the mission.
Norway threw in a few missiles.
Australia offered some planes.
England
gave us Prince Harry.
[audience laughing]
[whispering] And we decided to keep him.
[audience laughing, cheering]
Because he smells like clotted cream.
[audience laughs]
[normal voice]
But there was a slight problem.
None of those friends and allies
spoke Pashto or Dari or Urdu
or any of the 40 languages
and 200 dialects
that tend to populate
a country drawn by the Ottoman Empire
and then the British Empire
and then the Soviet--
whatever they are now.
And so it was kind of a group project,
the drawing of Afghanistan.
So what we really needed
were interpreters,
Afghans willing to defy the Taliban.
And we needed thousands of them.
My capability of survival
really relies on their interpretation.
They were more important to our survival
on the battlefield than our weapons.
I feel he's done more for this country
than I have personally,
and I got a Purple Heart.
Without that asset,
I was-- you know, I was basically deaf
and in many ways culturally blind.
Basically deaf and culturally blind
is the house band at the Pentagon.
Uh, but--
-[audience laughing]
We're--
They know all the hits.
But we're the US of, let's say, A.
What possible downside could there be
for Afghans to hitch their local,
primitive means of conveyance to our--
I'm being told it's cars.
Mostly they drive cars.
Toyota Corollas apparently.
But the point is this,
why wouldn't you wanna ride with us?
The Talibans, they call all the Afghan
interpreters the American spy.
And they call us the infidel.
And there's no forgiveness for us.
They will torture us,
and after that they will behead us.
Holy shit.
With the risk that these folks are taking,
the United States better be ready
to stand by our Afghan allies.
Their country will never be abandoned
to terrorists and killers.
As Afghans stand up,
they will not stand alone.
Our message to those women and men
is clear.
There is a home for you
in the United States, if you so choose,
and we will stand with you
just as you stood with us.
Oh, my God.
This is-- This is unbelievable.
Not only are we standing by you,
our beloved Afghan allies,
we are offering you sanctuary in our home.
In our home. Mi casa es su casa.
For people who actually do speak Spanish,
that does not apply to you.
[audience laughing]
It's an expression.
But they had bipartisan assurance
that we would have their backs.
So I'm sure even when we did leave
after 20 years of--
I think we can all agree, it was
a positive geopolitical home makeover.
There was an orderly process to protect
our Afghan allies, who had worked--
Holy fuck. That's--
Okay, that's chaotic. That does not--
Is that a withdrawal?
Oh, they're in a hurry to get out.
They just-- That's not how you-- Okay.
That's-- They're-- Okay.
Probably time
for a little history lesson here.
[smacks lips] Um [swallows]
America has a bit of a toxic,
international fuckboy, hit it and quit it
[audience laughing]
reputation.
I think the Vietnamese would attest,
the Kurds in Iraq and Syria.
I mean, as far back as
the Marquis de Lafayette.
That's the actual picture, by the way,
from 1776.
Aside from World War 2, America tends
to leave its adventures a bit messy.
And thus
"The Problem with Allies."
Geopolitical relationships are tricky
when the power imbalance is so pronounced.
And that can reveal itself in many ways.
Trade imbalance,
natural resource exploitation,
the [chuckles]
occasional redrawing of borders.
But the international game
is especially fraught
when it involves
the military-industrial complex
and you happen to be the host country.
See, more powerful countries
tend to come on pretty strong.
[imitating pickup artist] Hey, baby.
I know you wanna go halfsies
on a democracy, baby. Come on.
[audience chuckling]
Freedom is forever, baby.
[gasps] Oh, shit.
Is that my pager? I gotta run.
[normal voice]
And when we pull the rug out, and we will,
bad shit can happen.
Economic collapse, purges,
lower placement on our vaunted newscasts.
But that's the old us, baby.
We're working on our shit.
This time, we got you.
There's a program.
It's 12 steps.
It's called
the Afghan Special Immigrant Visa program.
And it provides a path to US citizenship
to many of those who put themselves
at risk by assisting the United States.
You just do a little paperwork,
submit it to the State Department,
and soon you'll be
at the Rock & Roll Museum
with a pocket full of Kohl's Cash.
[clicks tongue]
-[audience laughing]
Since 2009, the SIV program has brought in
more than 80,000 Afghan allies
and their families.
So, to borrow a phrase of the era,
mission accomplished.
I'm in my hiding place somewhere in Kabul,
and I'm living in panic.
Now, I'm not asking for the US visa.
I'm just asking for a safe place.
Please get me out of here.
Please expedite our-- our process.
[inhales deeply]
Expedite our-- our process.
You know [stammers]
we are almost getting killed, man.
Fuck!
We didn't get everybody?
Yes, apparently, since our orderly
withdrawal from Afghanistan,
over 100,000 SIVs,
as well as their families, are stuck.
And the processing of applications
is piling up denials and delays.
To give you a sense of what's keeping
our treasured allies from joining us,
what's getting them denied
for the visa program,
it's time to play
America's favorite game show:
Shit Outta Luck.
Will our Afghan friends make it safely
to the land of Cinnabon and Mountain Dew,
or will they be
say it with me
[audience chuckling]
[Stewart, audience] Shit Outta Luck!
[chuckling]
-[audience laughing]
We probably should have
rehearsed that earlier.
[audience laughing, applauding]
[chuckles]
You got the whole audience going,
"I did not know
[audience laughing]
that this was a participatory"
The goal of Shit Outta Luck is simple.
Land on a national treasure
and score that big visa,
or land on Torchie,
and you're shit outta luck.
Bring up the board, Pauly.
[bell dinging]
-All right. Here we go!
[audience laughing]
First up.
He's nearly completed his application.
He should be all set.
Let's go, big visa, big visa, big visa,
no Torchie.
Stop!
-[buzzer sounds]
Oh, fuck.
-[cackles, blows raspberry]
Apparently the application was denied,
these are true,
because the Afghan SIV
didn't have access
to a scanner in Afghanistan.
[New York accent] Hey, you expect me
to process a paper application?
What am I,
fucking Fred Flintstone over here?
Denied. You're shit outta luck.
[normal voice] Bring the board back up.
Interpreter number two, all he needs
is an interview with the US embassy
to complete his SIV application.
Let's go!
Big visa, big visa, no Torchie. And stop!
[buzzer sounds]
[Torchie cackles] Mm-mmm.
-Fuck!
This is true.
The interview that you do
for your SIV application
has to be at the US embassy.
Which is really hard
because it no longer exists.
[audience gasping, murmuring]
-[Stewart chuckles]
Now you participate.
[audience laughing]
Denied. Board.
One last contestant.
He had all his shit together.
His application had been in for six years.
Remember, these are real people.
Let's go!
All right, Torchie. Come on, baby.
Don't come up. Big visa!
[buzzer sounds]
-[cackles]
Can't verify service.
Can't verify service.
Can't verify service.
Torchie, you're--
You're fucking-- [stammers]
No, don't even--
Come on.
It turns out, for many interpreters,
their service with the United States
cannot be verified.
Because on our way out of Afghanistan,
we burned all the records.
In our defense,
we do keep identifying data
about our Afghan allies
on biometric storage devices.
In our non-defense, we left those behind,
and they are now
in the hands of the Taliban,
who can use those data devices
to retaliate against our Afghan allies.
So, I guess we're helping some Afghans,
just not the ones we thought.
This is an outrage,
and we need to speed this shit up.
The Taliban has their data.
Look, we are moving
just as quickly as we can.
We have, uh, mobilized,
uh, significant resources
to do all we can, uh, to make a dent,
uh, in, uh, the applicants.
Fuck that paper-pushing, pencil-neck geek
wearing his dad's suit motherfucker!
[audience laughing]
This isn't time for some bureaucratic--
We need presidential intervention,
executive action.
Put out the signal.
Save us, Dark Brandon.
[audience laughing]
Oh, save us, Dark Brandon.
You're our only hope.
President Biden announced today
that the United States will take in
as many as 100,000 refugees.
[gasps]
It worked. Lord Biden has risen.
Tell us, great one.
This program will be fast.
[inhales sharply, squealing]
It needs to be fast.
It will be streamlined.
Streamlining would be very helpful
to the process.
And will ensure the United States honors
its commitment to go to--
to the people of Ukraine.
D-D-- [stammers] What the fuck?
[audience laughs]
Did you just say Ukraine?
I mean, I-- I'm all for helping Ukraine.
I mean,
they're in a terrible humanitarian crisis,
and they're the reason the East Village
has such good diners. But
[audience laughing]
how in God's name did we admit more than
100,000 Ukrainians in under 5 months
while 100,000 SIV applicants have been
in limbo for years?
Why would we fast-track
one group over another?
Why would the--
[audience chuckling]
Why would the Ukrainian people
have an easier time
getting into the United States than Afgh--
I can't figure it out.
[audience laughing]
Per--
Perhaps it's as simple as pierogi, yes,
kebab, no.
That's probably it.
But there is hope on the hill.
President Biden could do more
to expedite the process.
And there is a bill
called the Afghan Adjustment Act
that would alleviate at least some
of the obstacles facing our Afghan allies.
It has bipartisan support.
But it has hit some snags.
And whenever we talk about Afghanistan,
the snag it hits is always the same.
They need to be thoroughly and completely
vetted for security concerns.
We must ensure that they are properly
and thoroughly vetted.
The vetting and interview process
must be strengthened and enforced.
It's not just interpreters
who worked with US forces.
They have to have been loyal interpreters,
and of course there has to be vetting
of all those people as well.
Mmm, vetting. No, I get you.
Is there anyone that could put that
a little more directly and ignorantly?
Child brides. They have a child bride.
Thirteen, 14 years old.
[crowd booing]
And we're gonna resettle them, I guess,
with a child bride.
Are they doing that? With a child bride.
[audience laughing]
Is it me,
or did he sound more jealous than angry?
[laughing intensifies]
What? Ah. Anyway.
I'm sure our Afghan allies
will understand.
It's not like our actions in this war
would affect
their ability to,
you know, work with us again
if, uh, we needed them to, right?
[Afghan translator] I was in combat,
standing shoulder to shoulder
with American soldiers at every step.
I saved their lives in many ways.
But in the end, they forgot me.
If I had known
this is how I would be left,
I would never have chosen
to work with them.
Well, that does sound
extreme ly rational.
Take a look at this.
[audience applauding, cheering]
We have those beautiful words
-that define our country
carved into the base
of the Statue of Liberty.
Give me your tired
but not
-too tired.
Your poor
but not stupid.
Your huddled masses
-unless
they are
-Muslim
Arab or
-Kurds
people who, uh, may have
a brown complexion and dark hair
and helped us
-in a war
that we started.
We don't want them.
Do you have any
Swedes or
-Norwegians?
And by the way
-we are
thinking of invading
-Brazil
Italy, Switzerland
-and maybe
Greenland.
Would you help us?
We have a lot of weapons
-and we don't want them to
go bad.
We're good.
-We're great.
Listen, we're the best in the world.
Right? Right?
We're America.
[Charlton Heston as George Taylor]
You maniacs!
[audience applauding, cheering]
-Welcome back.
Well, it-- it's evidently clear
that our elected officials have failed
our Afghan allies.
But the American veterans
who fought next to them have not.
Veterans have formed advocacy groups,
lobbied Congress,
and, in some cases,
set up their own operations
to try and get their interpreters
out of Afghanistan.
To hear more about these efforts
and the efforts to make it here
through SIV or humanitarian parole,
we have Matt Watters,
a US Special Forces sergeant
who served in Afghanistan,
and Shafiullah Sahil,
a former Afghan interpreter
for the US Special forces.
Guys, welcome very much.
-[audience applauding]
Thank you for having us.
Matt, uh, uh, I'm gonna start with you.
How did you get involved with--
Was-- Was Shafiullah Sahil--
And you go by Sahil?
-Yes, last name is Sahil.
Uh, was Sahil your interpreter?
And is that
how you got involved with this?
Well, so,
I deployed to Afghanistan in 2020.
And, um, we were part of
a counterterrorism force.
Afghan Special Forces was working with
US Special Forces.
And, you know, I speak as much Pashto
or Dari as they spoke English.
And so we needed Sahil
and other interpreters
to make sure
that the mission could actually happen.
And Sahil actually saved my life
on that deployment,
as well as other members of our team.
So we got to know him really well, and--
-[Stewart] No, no, no.
Sahil
Look at you.
-[chuckles]
What happened?
So, uh, once in-- in one compound, uh,
I was just speaking with
the kids of the village.
And I was trying to get some, uh,
important information from them.
So [stammers]
one of the, uh, kids said, like,
"The Taliban told us
they had some mines, IEDs on the way."
So they told the villagers
not to walk that way
because they-- they knew
that the team is coming here.
So Matt was standing, and I just told--
"Hey, sir, uh,
this kid is saying these things."
So after that,
we just became best friends and
[panelists chuckling]
-That'll do it.
Uh, I once helped a friend of mine move.
[panelists, audience laughing]
It's so interesting to hear the government
talk about, "We must vet these people."
The level of trust-- You've just met.
That information was crucial to you.
Yeah, we hadn't asked him
to talk to the local kids.
And so it was kind of
an eye-opening experience
about how seriously he took his job
and also how vital he was to our survival
while we were there.
Are you nervous at this point
that the US is going to withdraw
and you're going to be left vulnerable?
So at that time, we didn't know
that the US will be leaving.
That's why the missions were stopped.
And after, like, f-few months,
the threats started from the Taliban.
So they said, like,
"We found out who you are.
You have killed our brothers."
Or, like, mujahideen.
"And you were involved on those missions."
So, they were about to find my place,
and they wanna find me and
[Stewart] You have a family.
-and kill me. I have a family.
And finally after that I got a phone call,
and that phone call,
the guy was asking me, "Are you Shafi?"
I said, "Yes. Wh-- Who are you?"
He said, "Okay, don't ask who I am.
I found you, and, uh, I will show you
who I am once I catch you."
And then you see--
-Sahil, you have got to get caller ID.
L-Let me explain something.
-[chuckles]
This is fright-- Do you have any idea
that this is now happening to Sahil?
Yeah, so, um, Sahil and I stayed in touch
after the deployment.
[Stewart] Okay.
-And we texted back and forth.
And, I mean, for myself
and for other members of my team,
it was nerve-racking
because this guy had saved our lives,
and now we're basically sacrificing him
to be targeted by the enemy
that we had all targeted together.
And it didn't sit right, and so,
we knew about the SIV program.
We helped him fill out the paperwork.
We gave him some money,
told him to go into hiding.
And then, um,
we had to wait about two months,
and then we found out that he was denied.
Yeah.
Why were you denied?
So, I was just like, uh,
17 days short of the work--
the minimum work requirement
that they want for the SIV.
Yeah, and we thought
that he would be grandfathered in
because he didn't choose to stop working.
The United States government
terminated his contract.
And so, it wasn't like this was
something due to bad performance
or any issue like that.
In that moment, do you feel
like there's no recourse for you?
Do you feel hopeless?
So, I was just hiding at home
on the 15th of August
when the Taliban took over the country.
So then, uh,
Matt and the other team members,
they just told me to have your kids
and wife and go to the Kabul airport.
And we-- we went
because we had no f-- no other choice.
You go to the airport in Kabul.
-[Sahil] Mm-hmm.
You're there with your children,
who are how old?
My oldest son is five years,
and my daughter, she's three years.
And my wife,
she was pregnant at that time.
Did they just wave you in?
H-How did-- What happened?
[Sahil] Thousands of people
were trying to get into the airport.
There was a lot of shooting and firing,
you know?
And the people just were--
They were just running toward us.
And at that time,
my wife, she just tripped.
She tripped over,
and the people were running over.
So-- And I had my both kids.
And I also didn't want the people
to run over my kids.
And I was trying to block the people,
uh, and also save my wife.
And then she collapsed.
And finally, I mean,
because of the very hot weather,
my kids were about to--
I was thinking that they are going to die.
And the water
that we had with us for drinking,
I was just pouring that water
on my kids' heads.
I didn't want to, uh, lose them.
So, after three days,
struggling to get into the airport,
Matt told-- spoke to some soldiers
inside the airport.
And, uh, M-M--
he told me to have my daughter, Mina.
She had a red dress.
And I put her on my shoulder
that the soldier can identify me
and they can let me in.
-[Stewart] Oh, wow.
After that, we landed in Washington
on 26th August last year.
When-- When were you-- Please. Uh
-[audience applauding]
When-- When were you able to reconnect?
Uh, I think it was sometime in September.
I got a text from a USCIS officer.
So, US Citizen and Immigration Services.
And, um, they said that this guy
named Sahil is in New Jersey,
and he wants to see you.
And, I was pretty blown away
'cause I live in New Jersey.
Uh
-[all laughing]
So I drove there as--
-[Stewart] So-- Just--
I mean, New Jersey's a big place.
You're not gonna just run into each other.
Yeah.
-Uh, and-and he was able to--
And-And at that point, what--
Did the government set you up somewhere?
H-How-- What happened?
So, they took us to the hotel,
and then Matt and-- His father, actually.
His father came to the hotel,
and, uh, he took me to their house.
So, we are still living
with them in that house.
[Stewart] Oh, really?
Yeah.
-[chuckles] And they have helped us.
[audience applauding]
-[Stewart] Remarkable.
A US veteran fighting the anger
of moral injury,
having to go above and beyond
to pull the man who saved his life,
whose life is now under threat.
And this is the best-case scenario
that this country has to offer right now.
Wasn't there something
called the Afghan Adjustment Act
which was gaining some momentum
in a bipartisan fashion?
And what happened to that?
Well, so,
I think there's two groups of people.
Um, there's basically the Afghans
who are here in the United States
under humanitarian parole.
That grants 'em two years legal status.
-Right. Two years--
For those people, like Sahil, um,
they're basically in their second year.
So they're nervous that they're gonna be
deported after that time period is up.
And so they need
the Afghan Adjustment Act,
which will basically grant them a path
to getting a green card.
For the second group of people,
which is 100,000-plus people
who have applied for an SIV
and are still stuck in Afghanistan--
So the State Department, right now,
flies out about 150 a week.
If you just do the math--
-150?
And there's 100,000-- 150,000 there?
It's gonna take decades with that.
We're never getting it done.
They're not gonna be around by the time--
Right. That's insane.
-Yeah.
And so, they need more flights.
We also have, uh,
a gentleman right now in Afghanistan,
uh, who is joining us.
We're obviously going to blur his face.
And, uh, we will call him "Mosa."
Uh, he also worked for,
uh, the United States.
Uh, Mosa,
you are in Afghanistan at this moment.
Yes, I am. I am, Jon.
Mosa, I wanna ask you a question.
Was there an implied, uh, agreement
between you and who you were working with,
the United States,
that you would have safe passage?
Yeah, uh, Jon, uh, when--
when the Taliban took control
of the country,
uh, I was pretty sure
that I am among the evacuees
because I managed my job very well,
and beside that I was also
an SIV applicant,
which means
that the Department of State have my data.
But, unfortunately, uh,
I failed to get inside the airport.
What has your life been like
since those chaotic days,
waiting for some bureaucratic progress
from the United States?
I live in hiding
since, uh, I'm left behind.
[stammers]
And I change my appearance,
uh, when I go outside for any needs
or to buy any groceries for home,
and it's very difficult.
And beside that, um,
I have two children, Jon.
One is six years old, and another--
my daughter is three years old.
I'm not able to send them to school
because, uh, I'm scared.
I'm also very-- in a criti-- facing a very
critical financial situation as well.
And it's very difficult right now,
the life is very difficult here.
Uh, I need the United States government
to expedite the process
and get me out of the country.
Uh, well, Mosa, I can't thank you enough
for, uh, risking your life
on behalf of the American people.
Uh, I truly hope that--
that we're able to break through
whatever political impasse there is.
And thank you so much for joining us,
and please stay safe.
Thank you, Jon. Thank you.
[Stewart] Thank you, Mosa.
Uh, thank you, Sahil. Thank you, Matt.
Uh, it's certainly the least
that we can do as a country,
and we appreciate you being here
to, uh, share your stories.
Take a look at this.
-[audience applauding]
[announcer] Hey there, other country.
Has American foreign policy let you down?
Did the support we promised disappear
in a puff?
Have you been fucked
in the name of freedom?
Why don't you enjoy a Happy Meal?
-[audience laughing]
Yeah, America did that too,
and you're loving it.
So when our regular imperialism
lets you down,
our cultural imperialism will be there
to pick you up.
Drone attack?
Yummy!
Secret coup?
Hello.
Illegal arms sale?
Delicious.
More illegal arms sales?
Mmm.
We just can't stop selling guns
to bad people.
[purrs]
The point is, wars may come and go.
And presidents change
every four to eight years.
But you know who will never let you down?
Freedom ain't free
but McDonald's has a dollar menu,
which is super almost free.
Offer not good in countries
that invaded Ukraine.
[audience murmuring]
[audience laughing, applauding]
All right.
Now
For any meaningful bill
to get passed in the Senate
that could help our Afghan allies,
it must go through
the bipartisan Judiciary Committee.
So we went down to DC
to speak with the chair of that committee
and see what the holdup is.
Senator Durbin, you are the chair
of the Judiciary Committee,
powerful committee that has jurisdiction
over immigration policy in America.
So, in terms of the Afghan translators,
there's humanitarian parole,
there's the Special Immigration Visa
program, SIV,
and there's just applying
for standard refugee status.
So, is SIV-- Is that the best avenue
for, uh, those Afghans
who are looking to come here
and escape the Taliban
and escape that situation?
A lot of people here are
on humanitarian parole.
[stammers] I describe it
as the new rule in baseball
that says, a tie game and extra innings,
you put somebody on second base,
uh, in the hopes
that the game will end sooner.
Well, humanitarian parole puts
that person on second base
but never guarantees
that a batter's coming up.
So they may turn the lights out
in the stadium,
and you're still sitting there on
second base, saying, "I'm going nowhere."
SIV--
-[Stewart] Although
second base might be better
than the dugout, which is being bombed.
[chuckles]
That's right. I concede that point.
Right.
-When it gets down to SIV,
these are people
who have a legitimate claim that,
"We were there for you.
Now be there for us."
The problem is
that their numbers are large.
And the system
that Biden inherited from Trump
was in shambles, intentionally.
Mm-hmm.
-And what we're doing is vetting.
We're asking hard questions
about who these people are.
And they're saying, "The documents
that prove what we did are gone.
We left them behind.
In fact we were told to.
Don't take anything incriminating
to a spot where the Afghans--
Taliban can use it against you."
Uh, and so
th-there are all sorts of hurdles.
The administration is working toward
the same-- the same goal, which we share.
Right.
It's just a massive undertaking.
Let's get to the vetting 'cause this is--
Right now, I was looking at
the SIV program, and, uh
So, if you want to apply for SIV--
Let's say they were a translator,
and now they're in hiding from the Taliban
and they're living in Afghanistan.
And, uh--
So, the first thing they need to do is get
a one-year employment verification letter.
Then they'd get a recommendation letter
from a direct supervisor.
You have to complete the Form DS-157.
That's your-- your Supplemental
Nonimmigrant Visa Application.
I'm only going through this 'cause
I'm helping my son apply to college.
It's a very similar process.
-[chuckles]
Here's one that I thought was interesting.
"A scanned copy
of Afghan electronic passport."
And then a scanned copy
of your employee badge.
Well, then what you would do is,
you would scan your documents,
uh, and then upload them, submit them.
So, uh
are we insane?
[stammers] They're living in a country
where they're on the run from the Taliban.
They worked for us.
Why are we asking them
to submit letters of recommendation
when they worked for us?
W-We've already got all that from them.
The premise is sound.
We never want to allow a dangerous person,
knowingly
Right.
to come into this country or to stay here
if they're a danger to Americans.
Sure. But this is even--
I mean, even if you get that done
and you get approved
you have to go to the embassy.
You need an interview.
-Yes.
Do we have an embassy there?
I'm not sure it's a functioning embassy.
-[laughs]
[stammers] In the consulate--
-It's a building.
So, we're talking about
the need for a lily pad.
Uh, and that may mean leaving Afghanistan
to go to a third country in the meantime.
But why are we treating allied workers,
those who risked their lives on behalf of
the United States of America in a war--
Why are we putting them through a process
as though they were an unknown entity--
Doesn't make sense. No.
-It doesn't make sense.
So, what we have is
this Afghan Adjustment Act,
which Senator Klobuchar, Democrat,
Graham, Republican,
are cosponsoring
with other Democrats and Republicans,
which basically said,
"Okay, you want more vetting?
We're for vetting. Let's do it."
On a scale of reparations
for African Americans to PACT Act,
how close are we to getting that done?
On that continuum.
There are bipartisan, uh--
There is a bipartisan group
supporting this bill.
Right.
-It's good.
But we need that critical number of ten,
uh, Republicans who will support us.
We wanna get it on a bill
that has to pass.
Uh, I won't try and explain
what's wrong with the Senate.
It'd take too long. But--
You want to attach it to, like, an omnibus
or the-- the defense spending NDAA
so that, uh, they can sneak it in there.
You-- They wouldn't do it
as a stand-alone.
Not sneak it in, but put it on a bill
that is destined to pass.
Uh, and [stammers]
-[Stewart, audience laughing]
You say potato.
-I say po-tah-to.
Now, if it-- If it passes, what changes?
We create this pathway
for many of these Afghan refugees
to eventually get the ticket to ride,
a green card.
Graham and Klobuchar have said,
"If you wanna vet, keep vetting.
But get it done quickly,
because there are so many people
that deserve our help."
Well, look-- [stammers]
Let's take a different tack for a moment.
Ukraine is having, obviously, uh--
They're at war with--
You know, Russia has invaded them.
And they have a humanitarian crisis.
And so we create a program for Ukraine
and Ukrainians who wish to come here.
And within a couple of months,
I think 100,000 Ukrainians have come here
on humanitarian, uh, status.
Ukraine has a difficult time,
even in their own country,
determining who might be helping
the war effort for Russia.
And for Afghans,
we throw up our hands and say,
"Look, we're trying, but you just have to
be able to get a scanner."
C-Consider the contrast.
-Yeah.
Uh, when it comes to governments,
we trust the Ukrainian government,
and we are working with them.
Taxpayers are supporting them
in massive amounts to defeat Putin.
I-I'm not suggesting that, uh,
that program for humanitarian parole
for Ukrainians is wrong.
I'm only suggesting that
Afghans have certainly earned something
much more robust
than what they're getting.
But the point I was trying to get to is
-Yeah.
Ukraine is a government
that works with the United States.
The same can't be said for the Taliban.
In terms of--
-But these people worked for us.
Do we trust us?
-They worked for--
They worked for us, but the folks
who are resisting this in Congress
Yes.
-on the Republican side--
Some of them don't want any immigrants
from anywhere.
I mean, that is a closely--
-Right.
Not a closely guarded secret.
And secondly,
when you're dealing with non-white,
non-Christian immigrants,
uh, the record suggests that
they're going to be more, um, skeptical
as to whether they should be allowed.
Why won't the administration, then,
create a humanitarian relief program?
I mean, basically,
the Ukrainian humanitarian parole
was not a legislative act.
It was an executive act.
It seems convenient to be able to say,
"Republicans won't vote
for the Adjustment Act,"
or, "It will be difficult
to convince them."
But there's not a lot of evidence
that the Democrats have
the stomach to push it,
to put it on the floor,
or that the executive has the stomach
to issue an order.
Well, I can tell you this.
-Yeah.
This room where I chair this committee--
By the way, beautiful.
[chuckling] Thank you.
We have confrontation here.
-Mm-hmm.
And I'm not afraid of that at all.
-Sure.
Uh, I think the president's on board
for all of that.
I don't think he's resisting any of it.
As for the timing of it,
I haven't noticed anything that says we're
going slow for some political reason.
[stammers]
He's moving as quickly as he can.
The veterans who fought
for America in Afghanistan.
They feel a great debt of gratitude
to all those in Afghanistan
who risked their lives on their behalf,
and they feel that we've betrayed them.
Not just the, uh, Afghans,
but the veterans as well.
That we've betrayed their sacrifice.
I think they're right.
When it gets right down to it.
-Mmm.
Uh, I think we should've given
special consideration to those SIVs--
or those that really risked their lives
and their families' lives
to help us and to keep our troops safe.
I mean, for God's sake.
God forbid we're ever
in a similar situation in the future,
we want the native population to say,
"These people are not bad people.
The Americans are here
for the right reason. Let's help 'em."
How could we possibly make that case?
Well, we can't make the case
when you look back
at how we treated these, uh, folks.
We had provided support for Afghans
in a fight against Russia.
And when the Russians withdrew,
we withdrew our support.
And that radicalized a good portion.
That's what created Al Qaeda.
How are we not committing the same sin,
making the same mistake?
You are guilty
of linear rational thinking.
[Stewart, audience laughing]
We're in the capital of the US.
-Yes.
Election is just weeks away.
-Mm-hmm.
And this is not the best moment
for linear rational thinking.
What we're trying to do
is to beg, borrow, whatever it takes
to get as many of these Afghans
who helped us into the United States.
This Adjustment Act, it can pass.
I believe it will pass this year.
Final question, then, would be--
And thank you so much for taking the time.
I know it's an uncomfortable conversation.
If it doesn't find its way
into another bill that is sure to pass,
and we don't make it through
in the midterms,
would you support
the kind of executive action
that we would need to take
to get these folks out of harm's way
and to the United States
where they could be vetted
but finally be given some safe haven
on second base?
Yes.
All right, sir. Much appreciated.
Thank you
-Thank you.
[audience applauding]
-All right.
You believe him, right?
A senator wouldn't lie.
Would a senator lie to your face? No!
-[audience chuckles]
Of course we're gonna believe him.
That's our show.
Uh, but clearly,
we're not done with this issue.
For more information,
please check out these resources.
Or you can always find them
at our website,
which I have never visited.
Never logged onto it. Not even sure.
-[audience laughs]
Don't know if it's a password.
I don't even know what's on it.
Have heard the podcast. In passing.
Didn't care for it.
-[audience laughing]
Uh, all right, everybody,
it's time for the only thing that would
make this episode worse for Afghans,
Ted Cruz sharing his opinion.
Here it is, your moment of Cruz.
You know, we just saw a citizen blogger
dressed as Osama bin Laden
cross the Rio Grande.
Now, nobody stopped him.
-[interviewer] Wow.
It suggests to you, gosh, if one person
dressed as Osama bin Laden were to cross,
how many other
Osama bin Ladens could cross?
[audience applauding, cheering]