Little Mosque on the Prairie (2007) s02e06 Episode Script

- Yasir, could you - Out of the question.
But you don't even know what it is yet.
It's a blanket rejection.
I don't need to know.
I just need a ride to the airport.
- The Mercy airport? - Mercy doesn't have an airport.
Exactly.
You need a ride to the city where the airport is.
- So it's a yes? - That's a two-hour drive.
I have a business to run.
You need someone with nothing to do all day.
Good morning.
I'm just on my way to the park, to feed the birds.
Could you give me a lift? I need to pick up a friend from the airport.
Ooh, an adventure.
We are going to the airport, we are going in style.
Never driven on a convertible on a gravel road before.
Well, I told you.
We are going in style.
So, tell me about this friend we are waiting for.
Ali? Ah, went to law school together.
He's a bit shallow.
Self-centred.
Always have a way of showing me up.
I meant, what does he look like? Oh.
Typical Bay Street lawyer.
Flashy suit, $50 hair cut.
The point is, I moved on.
I realized there's something more to life.
Something spiritual.
Something Ali would never understand.
Salam aleikum, brother Amaar.
Waleikum salam.
Ali? I'm an imam now.
Funny.
When you described him.
I thought: short guy.
- Season 2 Episode 6 - Rival Imam Fatima, was the name of the Prophet Mohammad's daughter, peace be upon him.
Fatima the gracious.
Actually Ali, Fatima means No.
You're right.
Carry on.
So, who wants lemon cake? I'm trying to cut back.
I'll take some.
In fact, bring three pieces.
Because when they see mine, they're going to want some.
and I'm not the kind of imam who shares.
Alright, three slices coming up.
- He has money, right? - Yeah.
So, eh, what made you decide to give up law and becoming an imam? - Actually I was going to - Ali, I was talking to Ali.
Well, I just won a landmark class action best in this case against the major corporations and on behalf of literally hundreds of severely wronged families, and I thought, there has to be something more.
There was only one slice, so I had to cut it into three.
Are you sure my piece didn't just fall off of his? So, how long you staying in town? Oh, I'm just in town for the day.
Heading to the coast.
Going to do some work with homes for humanity.
Oh.
All those things where a team of people build a house.
I guess you could do it in teams.
Well, I hope you enjoyed our little town.
Friends, my belief is that people are the same where ever you go.
With the same aspirations, and yearnings, and failings.
Except here I got a white cab driver.
You coffee is on the house.
Ho, Mercy.
Day 22 of the worst drought the prairie has seen, since well, last summer.
And while the good citizens of Mercy are bathing in tea cups, and letting their lawns die, there are those amongst us, certain scar flaws, who, are going through water like it was water.
Hmm.
I have here a list, of the town's biggest water wasters.
and the only non-laundromat on the list is, hold on to your turbans Mercy mosque.
What are they doing with all that water? Building a hydrogen bomb? Or is it something sinister? Is the mosque building a hydrogen bomb? No, of course not.
I don't understand.
What other kind of bombs uses that much water? They're not building a bomb.
It's probably just the wudu.
Oh.
Where you sacrifice the chicken, and everybody dance around.
No.
That's voodoo.
This is wudu.
It's a washing ritual.
Before we pray, Muslim have to wash each body parts three times.
It's like your entire religion is based on obsessive compulsive disorder.
Oh, Christians have holy water? Yeah, we don't go spraying around all over the place unless there's a vampire coming.
I'm sure the Muslims of Mercy are very careful about how much water they use.
Well, all it takes is one bad apple.
And this is the prayer hall.
See now, this is nice.
This is all you need.
Oh.
I'm sure your mosque in Toronto is nice.
Yeah, but you lose the intimacy in a space that big.
Plus those old cathedral don't face Mecca.
So you have to pray in the corner? Well, we did.
But We are having the whole building turned.
- Turned? - Jack it up, turn it 45 degrees.
It's a nightmare.
But I guess you got to use the donation for something.
Yeah.
We ah just got a new shoe cubby.
.
Oh, to replace the old one out there? - No.
That is the new one.
- Oh.
Yasir.
Come meet my friend, imam Ali.
He's visiting us from Toronto.
- Salam aleikum, brother Yasir.
- Waleikum salam.
So you have your own mosque? - They're having it turned.
- Just 45 degrees.
Be careful of these big city contractors.
They over promise, and under deliver.
Contractors are busy, because their talents are rare.
In a world where there're so many tear down, They build up.
Yes.
Excuse me, I must meet with a client.
You're laying on a bit thick, just because he's a contractor.
Oh, he's a contractor.
Finally, a real imam with the beard.
Everybody reads from the same Quran.
Yes, but his is not the pocketbook edition.
OK, everyone, take a seat.
OK.
I guess you're wondering why I ask you all here today.
Actually, you didn't ask us here today.
We were already here, - and you just walked in.
- You didn't even knock.
Well, I was going to ask you here tomorrow, today But then you're all here today.
So I'm just asking you here today, today.
OK.
As you know, there is a drought.
And I have two words for you.
- Are they: Knock, knock? - No.
"Green mosque".
- I'm not painting the mosque green.
- No environmental Low-flow sinks, low-flow toilets, and light timers that go out at night.
I like it.
We're under fire for using too much water.
- So let's fight fire with less water.
- No.
Oh Baber, you're just against it because I'm for it.
That's one reason.
- And it is a good reason - It doesn't matter.
I'm not putting my entire business, on hold, to retrofit this mosque.
It's government funded.
- You'll be paid in full.
- Who will save the planet if not us.
You coming? I don't want to miss dinner.
Your farewell dinner.
I've been looking forward to it.
Going already.
And my Fatima's card is six stamps shy of a free samosa.
- There's a Fatima's card? - Oh yeah.
You didn't eh Never mind.
- Sad to see you go, buddy.
- Maybe I should stay another day.
No no.
You got to keep heading west.
See the Rockies.
I don't think the Rockies are going anywhere.
Roll the dice if you want to.
The important thing is: Tonight, we dine.
Yes.
But I wouldn't get my hopes up.
It's just Fatima's.
Surprise.
Salam aleikum, sister Fatima.
Waleikum salam.
Here is a free samosa for your trip tomorrow.
- I guess I won't needing this anymore.
- I'll take it.
They're not transferable.
Brother Amaar.
Sorry to interrupt.
- I need spiritual guidance.
- Of course, brother Baber.
Thank you.
Brother Ali, I need your help.
- They're turning our mosque green.
- Lime green or forest green.
- Hey.
Everything OK? - Yeah, I'm fine.
- Did you know they have a Fatima's card? - Yeah.
Everybody knows that.
- So, everything's alright? - I had better days.
You know who you should talk to? Ali.
He's good.
Enough of Ali.
I'm sick of this Ali mania.
I wondered what his last name was.
He's not who you think he is.
I know this guy.
He's an ego maniac.
He doesn't care about anyone but himself.
Sadly, brother Amaar is correct.
- Hey Ali.
- I was everything he said I was.
But I changed.
And I wrote about this experience in my book.
"Rainbow of Change".
You wrote "Rainbow of Change"? I love that book.
- An imam and an author.
- He should talk at Friday prayer this week.
I can't impose further on Amaar's hospitality.
If we don't have a bearded imam expounding on a topical issue, with Quranic citations, it will disappoint the children.
Hey.
I'm no Grinch.
The bearded imam is staying.
Yea Oh, astaghfirullah Baber, you made a wrong turn? Or, are you ready to convert? No, no.
I just have to use your bathroom.
Yes, well.
As the good Lord once said to Oh, yeah.
Thank you very much.
Bye He admit to the - Salam aleikum.
- Waleikum salam.
Hope you don't mind, I'm getting some work done.
Bill Clinton will not stop emailing me.
Of course not.
No, no.
Feel free to use it anytime.
OK.
The retrofits are almost finished.
Our mosque is newly green.
Hey, I have a great idea.
Why don't we invite the media to come and see it? Well yeah.
That's the whole point actually.
A reporter called, she's coming tomorrow.
- Oh! - You've been scooped, Amaar.
- The queen of green is getting it done.
- The queen of green? I like that.
Sister Rayyan, am I going to read about this in the newspaper? No.
Let's go.
Amaar, are you coming? No, no, no.
I'm waiting for my emails coming in from Pope Pious the second and Lou Reed.
- And these are the compact fluorescent's.
- You've thought of everything.
I wanted to get those motion-activated paper towel dispensers, but we couldn't afford them.
I'm sure there's a special prayer for those.
Hi.
Does Amaar seem kind of down to you? Isn't he always? No.
Since we've have known him, he's been quite chipper.
Huh.
Whenever I spent time with him, he seems unhappy.
OK.
This is my favourite.
So we've got the whole system on timer, so we're not wasting power in the middle of the night.
What powers the timer? Save your questions until the end of the tour.
The whole town hooked on Ali.
And it's going to end badly.
It's going to end badly.
- He seems nice enough.
- He's an ego maniac.
Plus he's flighty.
Look how he ditched law.
- You ditched law.
- But he's good at law.
- You're good at law.
- Whose side are you on? Sorry.
The point is, he's trying to make the moves on my congregation.
He does have all the moves.
- Acting all interested, it's not right.
- It's not right.
- This is my turf.
- Your turf.
He's got a mosque already at home.
He's probably has a mosque in every town of this country.
- I'm going to win my congregation back.
- Fight him, Amaar, fight him.
I'm going to write the sermon of a life time.
- You can do it.
You're Amaar Rashid.
- The two most exciting words in Islam.
Give him whatever the Muslim version of hell is.
Yes.
Is there not one bird in this neighbourhood? No.
Ali's going down.
Why are ongoing drought is a spiritual oasis.
Yes! Urgh! But the world is 80% water.
Why! Why! In conclusion, it is only through our adversity that we could fight NO! It's quite a nice beard you're working on there.
Huh? Thanks.
Uh, is this reporter going to be taking pictures? What do you think? Low flow water is a hot visual.
Rayyan Hamoudi? Andrea Bernan from The Chronicles.
Hi.
So nice of you to come.
Thank you.
- This is Amaar, he's our imam.
- I run the mosque.
- And this is Ali, he's an imam as well.
- It's not his mosque, it's my mosque.
- Mine's in Toronto.
- Oh! The one they are turning 90 degree.
- You see, that is so cool.
- It's only 45.
OK.
Are you ready to see the first green mosque in the country? Ready.
Where's your ramp? - Wheel chair ramp? - No.
Stunt ramp.
I was going to light some garbage cans on fire and jump over them? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Hah.
You do have a wheel chair ramp.
don't you? It's his mosque.
I, eh, uh hah.
- We're going to get you in somehow.
- No need! I've already got my story.
It turns out, we're not up to code.
It's an embarrassment.
At least you didn't look into the basement.
Why, what's in the basement? Nothing.
Can't you just build us a ramp? No.
If I build you a ramp, every mosque in town is going to want one.
Brother Yasir, we're not asking you to build a ramp.
Just provide materials and labour.
- I'm like - Others tear down.
You build up.
Sob.
I'm going to do it.
Wow.
You're good.
This drought is one of ways that Allah tests us as a community.
There are many kinds of drought.
Drought of compassion, the drought of ideas, The drought of faith.
- Yes! - You are so in the zone right now.
- Save me a spot at the service.
- You know it.
Holy cow.
I made it.
This is an outrage.
What is this mosque doing about this ramp? - Building a ramp? - Seems reasonable.
- What should I wear in the ribbon cutting? - Oh, they're not having a ribbon cutting.
No ribbon cutting, this is an outrage! Fine.
I'll organize a ribbon cutting.
Nothing on Thursday.
I'm opening a laundromat.
This drought is a spiritual oasis.
I'll warm them up for you.
Take your best shot.
I'm ready.
Seriously, just let it fly up there.
- It's not a competition.
- Certainly isn't.
Now bring it.
And with that, time for solemnity.
Little mosque with the big heart.
I will not take too much time, as this minbar belongs to this mosque's true spiritual leader, Imam Amaar.
I only want to say one thing.
Allah challenges us to inspire, the kind of brotherhood and sisterhood, that I have witnessed this week.
So, rather than dwell on the drought, let us look beyond it.
And never mention it again! - Takbir.
- Allah-O-Akbar.
- Takbir! - Allah-O-Akbar.
- Takbir.
- Allah-O-Akbar.
This spirit of imam Ali's message is inspiring.
But the drought we faced is a reality.
We're in the middle of it.
Right now! Some say: why build a ramp? When the town has no muslim in wheel chairs.
Well, may be the town has no muslim in wheel chair, because there was no ramp! - What's going on? - They're are opening the ramp.
- Today? - Yeah, you said it would be ready.
Rain on fresh concrete.
Should be fine.
And now your imam, Amaar Rashid.
Make it quick and speedy.
Scissors is heavy.
Actually, uh, I'd like to say a few words first.
What're you doing? I just think that it's important that someone say something.
And judging from your performance yesterday, You are not up to it.
- This isn't a good time.
- It's a perfect time.
I dominated you in law.
And now I'm dominating you in Islam.
I'm the "Islaminator".
And you may have these hicks fooled.
But I know the truth.
I think they can hear you.
Eh.
The heck with this! I've spent too much time in here anyway.
You're a rinky-dink town.
With a rinky-dink mosque.
And a rinky-dink imam.
- Argh! - Ah, we got big scissors.
What an hummock he turned out to be.
How could such cruel words come out of such beautiful beard! People.
Please.
Let's not let that bit of ugliness ruin our day.
Important thing is: Today, we become a mosque for all people.
Yes.
Yes Please.
Well, looks like Amaar's got his groove back.
Yeah, I have to go.
After you.
- Oh - Oh, oh.
Urgh Let me help you out of this.
I've already got my story.
Here.
You deserved this more than Ali's.
- Wow.
Ali's Fatima card.
- No.
It is a new one.
They are non-transferable.
Hey.
Amaar.
You were right about Ali.
He was a total jerk.
Now remember.
In Islam, the good deeds out weigh the bad.
Hmph.
Come on.
He fell apart like the wet wheel chair ramp.
Well, I'm been holding the grudge with this guy for too long.
God has no mercy on those, who has no mercy on others.
That's the lesson I learnt.
I just thought you've learnt a lesson about testing the wheel chair ramp, before letting a disabled person climb it.
Good point.
Thanks for the ride.
Well, there's a pigeon shortage in town, so I've got lots of free time.
Listen, that was a very generous thing you did, making everybody think you're a jerk.
- Calling them hicks.
What a performance.
- Hey, it was all your idea.
The right idea.
They have to believe that he's the best imam.
Still, it's no fun playing the bad guy.
I also get to play the good guy.
I, uh, left the mosque a little anonymous gift.
Allah, have mercy on me.
There's only one true God.
Subtitle by Kiasu