The O.C. (2003) s02e06 Episode Script

- Previously on The O.
C.
:|- You married me because I was pregnant.
|I married you because I loved you.
I've worked with him side-by-side|all this time.
How could I have not known he was|bribing this woman from city council? I spoke with Renee Wheeler.
|I know about the affair.
Sixteen years is a long time to be paying|palimony.
Unless there was a child.
I'm talking too much.
I get nervous,|start talking, and nothing shuts me up.
If you came to the judge|with documentation - the DA would drop the charges.
|- Mom.
What are you doing here? What is the point of living in Southern|California if it's gonna be this cold? Fifty degrees in December, Cal.
|That ain't cold.
Well, my blood|must have gotten thinner.
Or you got ice in your veins.
This time next year I could be spending the holidays|behind bars.
Now, that gives me a chill.
Don't know how you feel about it.
Warm and fuzzy.
How do you think|it makes me feel, Sandy? What the hell else can I do? You can come forward.
|Trial's right around the corner.
Renee's gonna plead the Fifth,|and when she does, you're sunk.
Unless you tell the truth.
I can't.
You know I can't.
- What about the child?|- Which child? Lindsay? How do you know her name? Yeah.
- What happens to her?|- Spare me.
You're not trying to protect Lindsay.
|You're trying to protect yourself because you know once you come|clean, you'll get what's coming to you.
But facing Kirsten and Julie|has got to be better than going to jail.
Kirsten, maybe.
Not Julie.
Well, then this is it.
I'm done, and so are you.
Happy holidays.
Mother? Did you not clean out|last year's menorah? This shammash|is looking a little bit waxy.
- Seth, sorry.
I'll get right on that.
|- A little help here, please? Thanks, Mom.
|We can't afford to cut any corners.
If my sense of the cultural Zeitgeist|is accurate, and I do believe it is this year, Chrismukkah sweeps|the nation, okay, people? Ryan, it's so nice to have someone|to help around the house.
You're right, it is, which is why I've|created a Chrismukkah work wheel so that everybody understands|his or her holiday duties.
- You're kidding.
|- Does it look like it? - Let me guess your job.
|- I'm supervising, smartass.
- Well, that's big of you.
|- I'm also overseeing merchandising.
T- shirts, mugs, and I'm penning a Chrismukkah hymn|set to Death Cab's "A Lack of Color.
" - All the makings of a classic.
|- Is Death Cab a band? Around we go on the wheel, and, Mom,|you're in charge of interior decor.
That's gonna mean trimmings,|ornaments, frosting of the windows.
Don't know, don't care.
|Just make it classy.
I'll do my best.
I've invited the Nichols,|or the Cooper-Nichols.
- Whatever they're called.
|- They are gentiles.
A whole slew of them at that.
Let's put our heads together,|do some serious Jew-cruitment.
Ryan? Think you can rope in some Hebrews? - Blond hair, blue eyes.
I'm a natural.
|- Fair point, Aryan friend.
Okay, where are we gonna find|some Jews in Orange County? Father! I have just discovered|the ideal job for you this Chrismukkah.
Chrismukkah.
Leave me out of it.
- Oy, humbug.
|- Oy, humbug.
Your dad seemed pretty upset.
You know my dad and the holidays.
He likes a slow build.
|Doesn't wanna peak too soon.
It's a long holiday.
|You gotta pace yourself.
Hey.
It's a marathon of presents,|not a race.
To get through this holiday season,|you must set a pace.
Those are good lyrics for the song.
|Do you have a pen? - You're not really writing a song?|- For Chrismukkah to go global we need an anthem.
|I'm thinking little JoJo can record it.
While spreading Chrismukkah,|you inviting Alex? I did.
She's away with her folks.
Probably at some Club Med tattoo parlor.
What about you? Is Lindsay around? - Yeah.
I think she is.
|- Gonna invite her? I can't.
I mean, it's kind of a big step.
And with Marissa there,|it'd be weird for her.
Marissa won't be there.
|My mom drew a seating chart.
- She said she'll be with her dad.
|- Really? We just got things to a good place,|got a little mystery back.
Inviting her for the holidays|might be rushing it.
Then don't do it, man.
Do not do it.
|Last thing you wanna do is rush things.
- What are you doing? We'll be late.
|- Sorry.
Sure we're not rushing things? Well, you know, we were married|for 17 years, so It's just been It's been so long since we've done this.
Well, it's like-|It's like riding a bike.
An incredibly toned and, you know,|evenly tanned and limber bike.
You know, with a really sharp mind|and incredible sense of Of interior design.
Oh, God, slow down.
I'm sorry.
It's just- Does this count as-?|As adultery? You know, cheating on your husband|with your ex-husband? Technically, I think It does, yeah.
Okay, sorry.
Let's just- Okay.
- What?|- Caleb and I aren't getting along.
He hasn't touched me in months.
He's probably going to jail.
Well, I think it's wonderful|how maturely you're handling it all.
I don't hear you complaining.
Well, do you wanna stop? No.
Thanks for coming|on such short notice.
I don't have much|of a lunch break, so - Why meet here?|- I've run out of places to go.
I've had so many secret meetings lately,|I feel like I'm in an Oliver Stone movie.
Look, I know you feel that if you|come forward you'll lose your daughter.
You may lose her either way.
The DA's sure Caleb was bribing|someone in the councilman's office.
Bribing you.
Unless somebody testifies differently they have enough evidence|to send you to jail.
How do I tell my daughter|that I've been lying to her her whole life? Inventing a father she never had.
|Keeping her from meeting her family.
Maybe it's time she met him.
Maybe it's time to stop lying.
Caleb won't come forward.
|I can't.
You're our last hope.
I'm sorry.
- Hey.
|- Hey.
- You gonna study all Christmas break?|- I hope so.
Keep me distracted from remembering|it's actually Christmas.
Not a fan of the holidays? - Who is?|- Well, Seth, actually.
He's even invented his own|super-holiday.
Chrismukkah.
- Chrismukkah?|- Yeah.
Well, that's cute.
I guess.
It's It's eight days of gifts, followed|by one day of many, many gifts.
We eat Chinese food|and watch Christmas movies.
Though, last year,|we watched Over the Top.
- Well, a classic any time of year.
|- That's what I'm saying.
Me and my mom,|we stopped even buying a tree.
It always just looked so sad|with just two gifts under it.
When I was little all my friends were waiting|for something from Santa and I was just hoping for something anything, from my dad.
- Still waiting?|- Not anymore.
Every kid grows up,|stops believing in Santa.
I stopped believing in my dad and there's no pine needles|to clean up.
So Disappointed by your family|over the holidays.
I've been there.
So do what I did.
Find another family to spend them with.
Come over.
Come over for Chrismukkah? It'd be better if you were Jewish.
There's a ratio issue, but it'll be fun.
- Seth will keep you very distracted.
|- Can we watch Over the Top? I could watch that movie|100 times and never get sick of it.
Where's Zach?|I'm not used to seeing you without him.
He left early for Christmas in Cabo|with his fam.
He's been gone a day,|and I miss him already.
DJ's in Sacramento|with his family for two weeks.
I miss him too.
Well, this should be a fun break.
|Me, you, Caleb and my step-monster.
Should be one for the ages.
We could spike the eggnog.
- Coop.
|- Kidding.
Kind of.
Actually, not really.
This sucks.
|Last year the holidays were so much fun.
Yeah.
I got rejected by Cohen|in a Wonder Woman costume and you got caught shoplifting.
- Yeah.
It was memorable, though.
|- I guess it was.
Hey, can I get a large coffee, please?|Thanks.
Hey, guys.
|Merry Chrismukkah.
- Don't remind us.
|- Forgot about your little holiday.
Okay.
My color-coded holiday|alert system is detecting you two.
You're taupe.
Come on.
That's a very dangerously low level|of holiday cheer.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I am looking forward to dinner|with my stepmom - face down in her Christmas ham.
|- I can't wait to be on Dad's boat and hear him talk|about how much he misses Hailey.
Wait a second, guys.
|Summer.
Marissa.
On behalf of Jesus|and Judah Maccabee and the Cohens I'd like to cordially invite you both,|and your dad, Marissa but not yours,|because he scares and hates me to come celebrate a little holiday|I like to call Chrismukkah.
It's also sort of my way of apologizing|for the whole SnO.
C.
debacle.
- Sure, why not?|- Okay, whatever.
Hey.
Somebody just went|from taupe to putty.
Kirsten, are you ready|for the investors meeting? Thanks.
I was, and I attended|the meeting two hours ago.
What? Two hours? My new assistant is constantly putting|the wrong numbers into my BlackBerry.
I tried to reach you all morning.
Well, my battery must have died.
Or not.
That's so funny.
|That's Jimmy's favorite song.
Is it? I forgot.
That's why you got it.
I got "Hungry Like the Wolf.
"|He got "The Hustle.
" - I was there when you picked them out.
|- It is Jimmy.
Nothing gets by you, Kirsten.
|You've got a memory like an elephant.
- You gonna answer it?|- No.
It's just Jimmy.
- Thought you were getting along.
|- Why do you say that? Last week when you said you and Jimmy|were getting along really well.
- You okay? You seem frazzled.
|- Yeah, well, you know I didn't get a chance to blow my hair out|this morning, so I said frazzled.
Not frizzy.
- Hey, is dinner ready yet?|- No.
Your dad's at the grill.
I'm famished.
|All this planning for the big day.
Taking it out of you, huh? Hey.
Ye of little faith.
|Trust those of mixed faith.
Okay, this year,|it's gonna be off the charts.
- It's gonna be Cochise.
|- What's Cochise? Highest level of holiday cheer|on my color-coded holiday alert system.
- Cochise is a color?|- It's in the beige family.
- Couldn't go with blue?|- Listen, it's gonna be awesome.
Especially now Marissa|and Summer are coming- Whoa, I thought|Marissa was with her dad.
She was,|but she was bummed about it.
Since you're not inviting Lindsay- Except I did invite Lindsay.
- That's awkward.
|- Seth.
What am I gonna do? They can't hang out together.
|It's too weird.
- I agree.
|- Not helping.
Oh, God, what if it's starting? - What if what?|- Chrismukkah backlash.
Is it getting too big and commercial? - Guess I'm done studying.
|- I knew this would happen.
It starts out|as this really cool cult holiday flying beneath the cultural radar.
Then, all of a sudden, it crosses over,|and there's too much pressure.
Can it really be the next Thanksgiving? - Can it top Halloween?|- This is off topic.
The government will ask me|to create new holidays.
Like East-over or Kwanzaa-shanah?|Can't let it happen.
- Hey, guys.
|- Can't talk now.
We have an emergency.
- What's going on?|- Ryan invited Lindsay over tomorrow setting off a wildfire that threatens|man, woman and Chrismukkah.
- You invited Lindsay?|- Is that okay? - Oh, sure, you ask him.
|- I don't think it's such a good idea.
It isn't? I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to impose.
Well, no, it's not that.
We have a pretty liberal|open-door policy.
It's How serious is it between you guys? I don't know.
You know,|there's still mystery.
Well, maybe not mystery, but suspense.
- You really like her?|- He wants to see her naked.
- I hate it when you do this.
|- Sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm starting to.
|I mean, should I not? Her mom's involved|with Caleb's case.
It's The timing, it's probably not great,|given everything.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
Okay.
Except what does Lindsay|have to do with Caleb's case? What is she, like, Caleb's hit man?|Drug dealer? Illegitimate love child? This stays between us.
At least until we make it|through these holidays.
Come on.
Dinner's served.
Hey, you going somewhere? Lindsay's.
I've got to uninvite her,|like your dad said.
- You are?|- She can't be here if Caleb's gonna be.
No, hey, man.
If we thought her and|Marissa together would be awkward And I need you to do something for me.
Yeah, sure.
Dude, name it, anything.
I need you to uninvite Summer.
I can't do that.
It's rude.
I gotta tell Lindsay we're not doing it.
She then finds out that|Marissa and Summer came over.
I see your point.
Well, while you're out- I mean,|you'll have your speech anyway maybe you could stop by|Summer's for me.
- Dude, please.
|- She's not gonna take it well.
Neither is Lindsay.
- Hi.
|- Hi.
- Happy Chrismukkah.
|- Can we talk? Yeah, yeah.
Wait.
But first I have to|show you what I made for tonight.
- Hey.
Merry Chrismukkah, Cohen.
|- Yes, it is.
- Tonight's gonna be so much fun.
|- Yeah, it'll be great.
- Can I talk to you for a second?|- Sure.
But first, can you help me|pick out a Christmas tree? I'm feeling all festive today.
Festive, huh? I know what I said about the holidays but then I started thinking about|hanging out with you and the Cohens.
And I got inspired,|and I stayed up all night.
And you're gonna think|I'm a really big dork, but Okay.
Here.
- It's a yarmul-Claus.
|- A yarmul-Claus.
Wow.
That's wow.
Yeah.
I made a whole bunch.
It was fun,|and I never have fun this time of year.
And maybe it was the new holiday or the idea of spending time|with a family who actually enjoys the holiday, but Oh, my God.
Wow, listen to me.
What did you wanna talk about? Could you bring eggnog tonight? Yeah, I'd love to.
Fresh, minty aroma.
|Symmetrical, conical shape.
Great, let's go.
A bit too bushy.
Moving on.
Good needle retention.
Nice scent.
Feels a bit dry.
|I don't think it's gonna last.
Summer, neither am I, okay? All these trees look the same.
When it comes to Haggadahs,|dreidels and guilt, you the man.
When it's Christmas trees,|bit out of your wheelhouse.
We've been here for hours.
You are right.
If I don't pull the trigger|soon, we're gonna be late to your house.
Hey, about that You know, I just think it's really cool|that you invited me tonight.
After everything|we've been through you were able|to put aside our differences.
I just think you're really changing|and that maybe we're actually friends.
Great.
Mistletoe.
Is there something|you wanted to talk to me about? How do you feel about making latkes? I'd love to! And could you|just carry this tree to my car? Okay.
- Hey, buddy.
|- Hello, friend.
- How'd it go with Summer?|- How'd it go with Lindsay? - She take it better than expected?|- Well - I couldn't do it.
|- What, you wussed out? - She's miserable during the holidays.
|- Dude.
- She made a yarmul-Claus.
|- A yarmul-what? Holy Moses, it's beautiful.
At least Marissa and Summer|aren't coming.
Yeah, about that.
Hey, guys.
Yarmul-Claus? Yarmul-what? It's so cute.
Well, if it isn't the Grinch - and Lady Grinch.
|- I brought fruitcake.
You shouldn't have.
|May I take your coats? - Can we talk?|- That's up to you.
Julie, sorry, I couldn't resist.
|This orange chicken is- God, I have missed you all day.
Still chewing.
I know.
I feel the same way.
What are we doing?|I can't stop thinking about you.
I know.
You know what? - Meet me in the bathroom-|- Is there any room in the fridge? Keep your fingers out of the food|till we eat, Jimmy.
God, no manners.
Sorry.
I couldn't resist.
I'm gonna go wash up.
Yeah.
Thanks for the ride, Mom.
You sure you wanna do this?|I mean, we hate the holidays.
That's our pact.
Maybe it's time to get over that.
|Get over Dad.
- It's Chrismukkah.
|- Yeah, so you keep on saying.
We can go see a movie.
|Double feature.
Have fun.
- Hello.
|- Hi.
- You're Seth and Ryan's friend?|- Yeah.
Me and Ryan are more like|lab partners, really.
Well, come on in.
- Jeez, Summer, come on.
|- I'm trying.
You've got to get|more aggressive, Summer.
Kick him.
Yeah.
You know, you can sit a little bit closer.
|I don't bite.
Happy Chrismukkah! - Hey!|- Hi.
Hey.
PlayStation? I love the holidays.
Just bringing everyone together.
So I've been thinking|about everything about the whole family,|about the holidays.
Where are we going with this, Cal? I need to tell the truth.
I need to tell Kirsten.
- You've got a hell of a sense of timing.
|- No, there's no good time.
That's true.
So, what are you gonna say? I was hoping that you could help me|with that part.
Oh, hi, Renee.
|Are you looking for Lindsay? Actually, I was wondering Can I talk to you? Can I get you a drink?|A glass of wine, maybe? No, thank you.
I know this is a terrible time|for me to show up.
Not at all.
Is everything okay? I'm gonna have a glass of wine.
- You have a beautiful house.
|- Thank you.
And what I wanna say to you,|it should be Caleb who's saying it.
- Well, he's here.
|- He is? - Would you like me to go get him?|- No.
I should be- This- This- - This isn't the right time.
|- Renee? Caleb.
What are you doing here? What you're about to do.
- Dibs on dumplings.
|- You have dibs on everything.
When do we watch Over the Top? - Maybe you should speak first.
|- Mom.
- Lindsay.
|- Lindsay.
Have we met? Lindsay, sweetie, could you just? - Just give us a moment.
|- Why? What's going on? That's what I'd like to know.
I'm going.
This isn't right.
No one's going anywhere until someone|tells me what's going on.
Hey, what's going on? Good thing the kitchen's roomy.
Cal, why don't you take it from here.
- I can't believe you just showed up.
|- Did you think - we could get away with it forever?|- Get away with what? Dad, start speaking.
- Does everyone have to be here for this?|- Be here for what, Cal? I'm sorry it had to happen|like this, Lindsay.
Kirsten I had hoped that I could protect|you both from this forever, but circumstances being what they are where your mother and I|face going to prison well, there really is no choice.
Sixteen years ago I made I made an error in judgment.
One that almost ruined my marriage.
- Oh, my God.
|- Oh, my God.
No way.
I'm so sorry, sweetie.
|I should have told you.
You're my father.
Lindsay, wait.
I don't know what to say.
Get out of my house.
Do you think I should go talk-? I think you should be|ashamed of yourself.
I'll handle your mom.
Hi.
I should talk to Lindsay.
I'm gonna go check on my mom.
|You guys just hang out.
Suddenly, my family,|not so dysfunctional.
- You do know this is my family too.
|- Right.
Sorry.
I forget sometimes.
It's|It's confusing.
You knew about this and never told me? - I couldn't.
You know that.
|- Attorney-client privilege, Sandy.
He cheated on my mom.
|I have a sister I've never known.
I know, and we'll figure it out.
- What's there to figure out?|- Please listen.
I never wanna see you again,|you son of a bitch! How could you do that to me?|To Mom? - Please.
I can't explain-|- Just get out! Kiki, honey.
Please.
- Kirsten.
|- Now is not the time, Cal.
Please.
- Let me try to talk to her.
|- Grandpa, I think you should leave.
I'll be better off going to prison.
- Is she here?|- This isn't a good time, Ryan.
I know.
I just|I wanna talk to her.
- Make sure she's okay.
|- She's not.
Can I even talk to her for a second? It's okay, Mom.
|I can speak for myself.
Hey.
So sorry.
I know you want to be alone|right now, but I want you to know I'm here.
Okay? I think it's best|if we don't see each other anymore.
I just I don't want to be anywhere near|your family.
Ever.
But thanks for coming by.
Happy holidays, huh? This year's getting even weirder|than last year.
I know.
My ex-boyfriend is dating|my stepsister? I think.
We have new boyfriends.
And our ex-boyfriends have|new girlfriends.
Is that what they are? Their girlfriends? I think.
And now my stepdad|could be going to jail.
Is there something in the water? - How'd it go?|- Hey.
Is there anything we can do? I think we have to cancel Chrismukkah.
- Hey.
|- Hey.
How's Lindsay? Not so good.
|How'd everything go with your mom? We're at charcoal on my color-coded|holiday alert system.
- Your poor mom.
|- Your poor mom.
Yeah, of all the people|to feel sorry for here - she's not really high on my list.
|- So then Chrismukkah? Canceled.
The way nature,|and apparently we, intended it.
That is so sad.
Chrismukkah is supposed|to bring people together.
It's the time of year|that you look forward to most, Cohen.
Yeah, well, you know, my mom throwing|vases at my grandfather's head kind of trumps it,|even if it has twice the resistance of your average holiday.
- You want a ride home, man?|- Yeah.
Actually, I do.
Unless Summer needs help with|the "ginormous" tree strapped to her car.
So that's it?|You guys are just gonna give up? Give up on Chrismukkah when|everyone we know needs it the most.
Okay.
Thank you, Tiny Tim.
Well, what do you wanna do, Sum? - We can't go back to the Cohens'.
|- Lindsay won't talk to me.
- And I can no longer walk.
|- Well, you guys can all give up.
But I still believe|in a Chrismukkah miracle.
And I have a plan.
I've been looking for you|all over the house.
I wanted to see if Marissa was back yet.
|She's not.
You can bet she'll make this|about her and that we will suffer the|consequences for a very long time.
I know.
It's tough on everyone.
Which is why I tried to keep it a secret.
You and your secrets, Cal.
You need a walk-in closet|for all of your skeletons.
I promise you - this is the end.
|- Yeah? You don't have an evil twin?|You're not really an alien? But now that the truth is out there,|the case will go away.
I'll be free.
I just can't believe|you cheated on your wife.
It was hell.
And it never|happened again.
Never will.
I have everything I need|from this marriage.
- I hope you feel the same.
|- Don't put this back on me, Cal.
I wasn't.
I was merely saying I don't know what I'm saying anymore.
I'm tired of lying.
I want|this whole thing to be over, and I - I need you to forgive me.
|- I'm gonna go try and find Marissa.
- Does that mean you forgive me?|- I don't know.
- Hi.
|- Hey.
- You went and saw Lindsay?|- Tried.
Poor girl.
- How goes it here?|- Fantastic.
Kirsten's locked herself in her closet.
Other than requesting|a PowerBar be slid under the door she isn't speaking to me.
But on the plus side,|there's plenty of moo shu available.
I'm sorry.
I just-|I want you to know that I'm sorry.
- I didn't uninvite-|- Kid this is so far from being your fault.
- Well, you don't think it's yours.
|- No.
But no good deed goes unpunished.
Which explains why my wife is holed up|next to a shoe rack.
- Hey, you mind if I talk to her?|- It's your life.
Go away.
It's Ryan.
I don't really feel like talking|to anyone right now.
All right.
I know.
I I was hoping we could talk|about Lindsay.
Is she okay? No.
Well, not right now, but I guess it depends.
Depends on what? On whether or not|she figures out she's part of a family that's pretty good|at letting in new members.
- Good line.
|- Thanks.
Just don't tell Sandy|that I came out for you, okay? Yeah, because he wouldn't|wanna hear that.
You wanna meet your sister? I don't know if I'm ready|to start referring to her as that.
But Lindsay seems like a really great girl.
She is.
Coop, I cannot believe your dad|lives on a boat.
That is so Miami Vice.
- You've seen Miami Vice?|- Repeats.
My stepmom, she finds|the pastel colors soothing.
She's on some interesting drugs|these days.
Which I will be keeping away from you.
Dad.
Dad.
- Hi, girls.
|- Hey.
- How are you?|- We're okay.
We're just in a rush and we were wondering, do you have|a generator and an extension cord? - I don't really like the sound of that.
|- It's really important.
A Chrismukkah miracle|hangs in the balance.
We'll explain later.
Well, luckily, living on a boat|requires one to have such stuff.
It's right around the corner.
Got it.
Now, have you spoken to your mom? - She's worried sick about you.
|- Really? That's too bad.
You've been talking to her a lot lately.
You're not, like,|becoming friends or anything? Why? Would that?|Would that be so terrible? - Yeah, for you.
|- All right.
Got it, Coop.
Let's go.
- Love you, Dad.
|- Thanks, Mr.
Coop.
They're gone.
- I don't suppose you heard any of that.
|- Please.
It's almost a compliment from her.
What are we doing, Julie? Are we?|Are we making a huge mistake? Yeah.
But I wanna be with you.
- Hey.
|- What are you doing here? Your mom said I could maybe find you|here.
She also said you're not - in the mood to see any friends.
|- I'm not.
Okay.
I get that,|but here's the thing, Lindsay.
- You and I, we're kin.
|- No.
- No, we're not.
|- Yeah.
Yeah, we are.
Congratulations.
|You're a Cohen.
Welcome to a life of insecurity|and paralyzing self-doubt.
It's a little soon to joke.
Not for us Cohens.
It's what we do.
|Laugh through our tears.
Make jokes inappropriately soon|after a traumatic event.
Sometimes, we'll just make the joke|during the traumatic event.
Yeah, traumatic Seth, doesn't even begin|to describe this.
Look.
I get that what happened|seems really overwhelming.
- Do you?|- Yeah, I do.
But I think you and I have a lot|to be grateful for.
Most of all, that we didn't start dating.
Yeah, because that|would've been gross - on several levels.
|- Hey.
There you go.
That's what I'm talking about.
|You are a Cohen, okay? And I like that.
You know what|that means? You get one of these.
Enjoy.
It says Laura.
It's the only one they had at the store.
|I'll fix it later.
So when did you come up|with this holiday, exactly? No, I didn't, actually.
Jesus and Moses,|they put it together over lunch.
A few years back now, I think it was.
What does Moses have to do|with Hanukkah? Wait, no.
I think you're missing|the point of the holiday completely.
Which is? Hi.
I'm Kirsten.
Hi.
Welcome.
- This is really weird.
|- It's our family.
Thank you for doing this.
Thanks for coming forward.
|You did the right thing.
Yeah? And maybe someday|Lindsay will forgive me.
So, Summer Roberts,|you saved Chrismukkah.
- I kind of did, didn't I?|- I hope I can repay you.
Well, you can start by carrying my tree|to my car later.
- Hey, guys.
|- Hey.
Eggnog? Latkes? None for Summer.
|It gives her gas.
They figured you hadn't had|a Christmas tree for a while.
- I don't even know what to say.
|- You don't have to say anything.
Hey.
I've got latkes.
That sounds kind of disgusting.
Yeah, I know.
Can we order pizza? All right.
Who's ready to hear|the Chrismukkah hymn? It's penned to Death Cab's|"A Lack of Color.
" What? No one knows|what that song is, Cohen.
Seth carrying a tune.
Now, that|would be a Chrismukkah miracle.
Fine.
I'll do it in my own tune.
- Come on, sing, sing, sing.
|- All right, all right.
Yeah! Yeah!