King of The Nerds (2013) s02e07 Episode Script
Angry Nerds
Previously on King of the Nerds Oh, my.
Midas Touch Attack jumped their way to victory.
Yes! You were the man! Winning the nerd-war for the first time in 5 weeks.
Guess who's not going home tomorrow? The Titans of Rigel found themselves in an unfamiliar position.
The Titans now know what it feels like to lose.
I'm gonna take a moment and compose my thoughts.
Kayla used her to stay out of the nerd-off.
I think it'd be in the best interest for the whole team, if we vote for Brian, and Instead, Brian and Chris space-battled for superiority.
I took those ships down! Blast! Blast! And Brian blew Chris away.
Victory for Brian, and all of the hobbits that he leads.
The final five nerds were shocked to learn that the teams were disolved.
From here on out, it's every nerd for himself.
It's suddenly become real.
And Chris' hopes of being crowned King of the Nerds, vaporized.
Jack: Brian, congratulations.
- Yeah, that was awesome.
- Very impressive, Brian.
Some pretty sharp shooting, Tex.
Brian: Yeah, I don't know where that came from.
I am a tangled jumble of emotions.
I'm relieved.
I'm really hungry.
To Chris.
To Chris.
To Chris.
I just can't relish kicking Chris out.
- We are the top five.
- We're the final five.
We survived high school, and now we're surviving Nerdvana.
[Laughter.]
Zack: Equal challenges, perhaps.
[Laughter.]
Xander: While we still hold purple and gold close to our hearts, there really is no more team.
Not only has the game changed into, like, individual mode, but it's changed social dynamics a lot.
Well, I'm glad that you're still here.
No.
While I loved the titans of rigel, they're dead.
I've got to play for Xander now as the Titan of Xander.
We're just five individual nerds competing.
Well, four individual nerds and one king.
I will fight you for the title of King of the Nerds! No teams.
All chaos.
Whoo-hoo! Lunge.
Oh! Yeah, I'd be dead if it was a real sword 'cause that hurt already.
Sheesh! Zack: We're all sword fighting and joking around, but I know at the back of our heads, we all want to be the one stabbing each other for reals.
Yah! Get him! Finish him off! Kayla: I'm surrounded by a bunch of little guys with fake swords.
Oh, darn it! My gloves are off, boys.
It's bare-knuckle time.
Zack: I'd be okay with whoever of us, honestly, wins this competition right now, you know? Really, I think we are all kings and queens in our own right, and, obviously, only one of us can win this, but, you know, it's not like there's a kind of nerd that's better than another kind of nerd, you know? Well, there is one nerd that's better than the other.
A "Star Trek" nerd hands down is better than a "Star Trek" nerd.
[Laughter.]
- [Siren wailing.]
- Calling all nerds! Please join us in the courtyard! You're getting really good at that.
Xander: I am excited and a little bit nervous to find out what this Nerd War is today.
I have confidence in my skills that I'll be a strong player.
I shall reign supreme as king of Nerdvana.
[Laughs evilly.]
[Clears throat.]
Still working on the laugh.
Welcome to the first individual Nerd War.
- All right.
- Whoo-hoo.
As you know, your teams have been dissolved.
So, you're not gonna be needing those banners anymore! All: Oh! [Chuckles.]
Seeing the banners drop is blasphemy.
You shouldn't let those touch the ground, man.
You are now on your own.
Whew! And the best thing to play by yourself is video games.
Ah! That's right.
It is live-gaming week at Nerdvana! [Applause.]
I'm "World of Warcraft" top 25, Fury Warrior in Cataclysm.
I am amazing.
I am a super-hardcore gamer.
I play to about 140% of my simulated numbers, which at first sounds utterly illogical and impossible, but it's just how good I am at video games.
You will be living the dream inside a full-scale, live-action video-racing game known as "Nerdio Karts.
" [Laughter.]
Kayla: Oh, yes! I love vehicles.
I live my life a quarter mile at a time.
Whoever wins this individual Nerd War will be safe from banishment in this week's Nerd-Off and also will get the right to pick one person to go into the Nerd-Off.
The remaining four people will vote on the other person.
Brian: It worries me that this is video-games week, and Zack is a video gamer.
He may just pull another one out yet.
Meet us at the game grid.
You have three hours.
- All right.
- Let's go.
- On your marks.
- [Imitating motor.]
[Imitating motor.]
[Laughing.]
Kayla, this is the closest you're gonna get - to a fix-my-car Nerd War.
- [Chuckles.]
This sucks, because I've never driven a car before.
I can't even ride a bicycle.
I used to know how to ride a bicycle, then I forgot, and now I fall down whenever I try to ride a bike.
So, like, which side is the gas on? Oh, wait.
In an actual car? I've never touched cars or anything.
Kayla: I've seen his coordination with a sword.
I think it's good that he doesn't drive.
I'll hit you! Take this! Take that one! And another! Xander: I'm doing a lot of research with go-kart racing in general.
I don't really know if we're going to be driving a car or if we're gonna be remote-controlling a car or if it will be just a video game.
I'm a gamer, so whatever they throw at me, I'm gonna be good at it.
This is another one of those things where I have so much experience in, like, building cars and stuff.
That'd be really embarrassing to fail this one.
Meanwhile, I'm going to look up which one is the gas pedal.
- Brian: Good luck.
- Uh-huh.
Zack: The individual challenge sucks the problem is, here, I know I'm going to lose this one because I have none of these skills.
I've never done anything like this.
I haven't driven before, because I never got my license.
I was busy writing books and stuff.
The grid a digital frontier.
I tried to picture the nerds as bundles of information as they moved through the computer.
What did they look like? Were the circuits like freeways? I kept dreaming of a world I knew that I would never see.
And then the nerds They entered it.
Welcome to the game grid.
Brian: Bobby and Curtis knew what they were talking about.
I'm actually inside Tron.
I feel like a toaster.
Now, you will each be piloting your own Nerdio Kart in a race lasting 12 laps.
First place gets you 5,000 points, second place 4,000, and so on.
There are bonus stars around the racetrack that light up randomly and are worth 250 points each when you drive over them.
Curtis: The points you collect when running over stars can make a difference in your final score no matter how you place in the race.
Bobby: Your karts have been randomly assigned a starting position.
Please find the kart with your picture on it.
Nerds, you may mount your machines.
Xander: Obviously my skills in "Mario Kart" will transfer over to real life, [Chuckles.]
right? Kayla: I'm playing against a couple of gamers Zack and Xander.
But you know what? This is not a video game.
This is real life, and I'm ready to fight in real life.
Zack: I'm an extremely competitive human being, and I'm a gamer.
Gamers don't give up about things.
We just don't.
[As Mario.]
Let's go.
I'm gonna win.
Tron Tron Kitty! Ready Set Go, nerd racers! Go! Xander: The only way to guarantee not going into the Nerd-Off is to win this race.
Kayla: [Chuckles.]
I love cars.
If I need to go relax or something, I change oil.
Sometimes that is therapy.
Tron Tron Kitty! Brian: Pom Tron Kitty is in probably her least revealing outfit yet.
I'm gratified.
Ready Set Go, nerd racers! Go! And they're off.
A little tentative at the start, but that may be because Zack is in that pole position, and that means the driver without a license is setting the pace here.
Bobby: Xander looks like he's waiting for his chance to make a pass, but Zack is holding him off.
Zack: I am winning right now.
I'm doing fantastically well.
Apparently, I'm just a total natural at this.
That is Zack in the lead.
Xander: The hardest thing about driving this kart is getting the timing down between braking and accelerating.
It's all about timing.
[Tires screech, crash.]
Whoa! Pile-up.
Kayla: I see Zack skid out, and I instantly go for that little space.
Stay out of my way, boys.
Here comes Kayla.
Zack: Oh, this is stupid.
I don't know what I'm doing at all.
[Thud.]
It.
And everyone's back on the road again.
Kayla is our new leader with Jack, it looks like, in second place.
Everyone's getting more used to their Nerdio Karts Picking up the pace here.
Still a long way to go, but everyone wants that first-place finish.
Oh! And Xander clips the wall trying to pass Brian.
These nerds are not fooling around.
Oh! And Xander threads the needle between Brian and Zack to take third place.
- What a move! - Brian: Ooh, sorry.
Ouch.
Brian clips the rear bumper of Zack and falls into last place.
Right now I am driving slower than my old 56k modem.
Look at how far ahead is.
Come on, boys! Follow the leader! Whoo! 10 laps remaining.
Brian: This is not just a pure racing game.
We have these bonus stars to hit.
Even though we may end up in a lower place than somebody else, if we hit enough bonuses, we could still pop them.
250 for Brian.
My God, it's full of stars.
And the bonus stars are beginning to appear at random around the course.
Whoa! And there's another one.
Jack just hit one of the bonus points.
Kayla: I'm coming up on Brian.
I'm trying to get past him Brian: Whoa! And I clip him.
Sorry.
War is war.
There goes Jack.
There goes Jack.
He's looking good.
Jack: I'm a little bit behind, but I'm at least not like Brian or Zack.
They seem they went Oh, God.
I need an ana Okay, give me two seconds to think of an analogy, okay? - Brian: Ooh, sorry! - Zack: Oh, crap! They're crashing more than Microsoft.
Wha-hoo.
What the hell was that for?! Freaking plowed right into me on purpose.
- [Crash.]
- Whoa! Crap! Xander: I see some pretty bad wipe-outs, and it's just a knee-jerk reaction.
I stop and see if they're okay.
What a stupid move that was! Curse my bleeding heart.
Curtis: Oh! Whoa! Big pile-up.
Very aggressive driving.
Jack: I just passed Zack, and Zack crashes into me.
Learn how to drive, rookie.
An Asian just told you to drive better.
[Thud.]
Zack: Oh, God dang! It's like he's never driven.
Bobby: The game grid is alive with action, Curtis.
Being inside the game is really the only way to play.
Three laps to go, Robert.
And here goes Kayla again.
She is just burning this track.
Kayla: Whoo-hoo-hoo! "Warp speed, Mr.
Sulu!" There goes Brian Hotly pursued by Zack.
Warp speed.
This is the last lap.
Xander: I'm in second place.
I see the white blur up ahead that is Kayla, and I try my damndest to get up to her.
I'm still trying to collect stars, because, in my mind, I'm thinking if I get second place, maybe I can get enough stars to pass her.
It's too hard to tell who's gonna win this.
No, it's all gonna come down to the bonus points, Robert.
There's Tron Tron Kitty with the checkered flag, and it's Kayla first, Xander a close second, and the rest of the field hoping they have enough bonus points.
Jack in third, Zack in fourth, and, finally, Brian in last place.
Kayla: Getting the fastest time is a huge relief, but it's not over yet.
Please have the most stars.
Please have the most stars.
We have the results.
Combining your bonus stars and the position you finished in the race, in last place with the least amount of points Brian.
Brian: Am I embarrassed to come in last place in a racing game? Not really.
Am I embarrassed to lose to somebody who doesn't have a driver's license? Little bit.
In fourth place Zack.
Zack: It's utterly unfair.
Right at the beginning of the race, Xander hits me and sends me into a tailspin.
Immediately afterward, Kayla hits me.
After that, Brian hits me.
This is just stupid.
Jack hits me and throws me into a wall.
I was rear-ended by Xander.
Kayla hits me a second time, and as she goes by, I hear her laughing What the hell? In third place It was Jack.
Now it all comes down to Kayla and Xander.
[Exhales.]
Kayla, you had the fastest time, and that gives you 5,000 points.
Thank you.
Xander, you came in second, and that gives you 4,000 points.
Curtis: It will all come down to how many bonus points you picked up along the way.
With 1,750 extra bonus points [Exhales.]
Seven stars Now it all comes down to Kayla and Xander.
With 1,750 extra bonus points [Exhales.]
Kayla, you have won this Nerd War and are free from banishment for the week.
It's all for my grandpa, who taught me how to drive and to build.
I remember sitting there handing tools while my grandpa was underneath the car.
And as he got older, he had Parkinson's, and before he passed away, I was under the car and he was handing me the tools.
As a reward, you'll be getting a telepresence robot from double robotics worth $2,000.
Oh, my God! On top of that, you will be receiving a second robot to give as a gift to one of the nerds who are standing here.
Oh, my goodness.
I'm gonna go to the person - that kept me on my toes the entire time - [Chuckles.]
And, also, who needs to learn a little more about robotics.
Yes.
Congratulations.
Thank you very much, gentlemen.
I expected Kayla to either give her robot to Xander or me, and the fact that Xander came in second means that he earned it.
Kayla, you alone must decide on one nerd to go into the Nerd-Off.
The other nerd will be voted for by the four of you.
And in the event of a tie, Kayla, you will make the final decision.
And remember the words of Sun Tzu "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
" Now unplug yourselves and back to Nerdvana with you.
Kayla: The decision I have to make It's going to dictate who's in the final four.
But I'm gonna be there for sure.
Zack: It's completely unfair.
Brian hits me and Kayla hits me.
Xander rear-ended my kart.
The only walls I hit were walls I was pushed into.
People kept hitting me on the sides, sending me to the wall.
People hit me in the back, sending me into the wall.
It's unfair.
Jack: Well, good job, Kayla.
- Thank you, guys.
- Pretty sweet.
Thank you.
I'm sorry I took you out, there, man.
I was trying to get you on the inside corner, and then you just came off your drive line.
I was like [Laughter.]
Kayla winning big is probably the second-best thing that could have happened besides me winning.
Kayla is the nerd here that I can trust the most, which is to say that I can trust her a little bit.
Brian: Good job.
Good job.
Thank you, guys.
Jack: Kayla has so much power right now, and I think I'm the prime target for elimination after Zack, so I have to do some serious diplomacy.
- You kept me on the toes.
I didn't realize.
- Oh, my goodness.
[Both scream.]
Oh, Kayla, I got to say, thank you so much for picking me.
I'm just super grateful that Kayla thought to pick me, and she made the right choice.
[Chuckles.]
Okay, robots, what do I do? This face is gonna be on a robot wheeling around America.
This is the fanciest thing I've ever played with in my life.
This is pretty darn awesome.
[Chuckles.]
Hello, everyone.
My prize is off the hook.
- Hey, what's up? - [Chuckles.]
- How are you? - I'm good.
Xander: It is amazing.
I can communicate with them.
They can see my face.
I can go left and right, forward and backward.
It really does feel like a video game, only it's happening in real life.
That is a pretty kick-ass reward.
I don't really get it, to be honest.
I'm pretty sure that even though this is an individual game, there are still alliances, and that's how this game always works.
Kayla's putting one of us in, certainly.
But I don't know what she's actually gonna do, though.
Jack: It's not a very optimal situation.
Got some popcorn in my nose.
There we go.
If Kayla wants to win, is it optimal for her to put one of you in? To be honest, the person with the highest chance of winning the game is probably you.
With this final vote upon us, politics is afoot.
Now it's time for us to all make like 19th-century European diplomats and play the great game.
How do you think voting's gonna happen? Well, first, it all depends on your vote.
So, who do you think you're gonna vote for, then? Who do you think Kayla will pick? So, what are your thoughts on the Nerd-Off? What are you thinking about right now? I assume that you have certain ideas.
What I decide to do actually might not be what everyone's expecting me to do.
I thought so.
Kayla: It's an individual game.
An alliance won't help out much.
But we don't know what's gonna happen, so if there's going to be another final Nerd-Off where votes are going to be tallied, an alliance and friendships will possibly help me to be King of the Nerds.
I'm going off of the assumption that you have voted Zack in.
That's just what I had to base my plan off of.
Zack and Jack have a vote, and they're going to vote for Brian, most likely.
- 'Cause you're the gamer.
- 'Cause they won't vote for me.
If I stand with Brian, it's a gridlock, and that gives you all the power because Brian and I would both vote for Jack.
Kayla: I'm used to being surrounded by guys.
But I'm not used to all their attention being focused on me.
Brian: I think that the most interesting Nerd-Off, and probably the most benecial for me, anyway, would be Zack versus Xander.
There's some devious people in this house right now Me among them.
I definitely will tell people who I'm voting for.
Whether or not ithem tell.
You're thinking between either me or Jack for the Nerd-Off.
Is that semi-accurate? [Sighs.]
- Possibly.
- [Chuckles.]
I could also go for another big gamer in this house.
Xander is one of your targets right now, potentially? - He could possibly be.
- Huh.
I just think that Brian would be a pretty dangerous person to, like, have alive at this moment of time.
- Hey, Zack.
Come over.
- Zack: What are we talking about? We're talking about Brian.
Ooh.
If Jack and I vote with Xander, we can avoid the deadlock situation where we just have a tie in our votes and Kayla gets all the power to select a second person.
I was just talking to Kayla, and she actually seems to say that the people on her list are actually more you.
- What?! - If she votes for you, the safest option for you to go in against is probably Brian.
And then if she votes for me, my safest option is definitely Brian.
Xander: If I were to vote for Brian, it would be putting a strong player into the Nerd-Off with a good potential of losing, considering it's gaming.
We're basically fighting for probability points.
And I think the best probability point, for at least the three people here, is Brian.
Yeah.
Xander: I have a proposal for you.
- Brian: Okay.
- Kayla: What do you got? So, we have to put a lot of trust in each other.
I am happy to do that.
I do need some insurance, 'cause, like Batman, - I got to think of all eventualities.
- Yes.
So, I have set up Xander bombs throughout this voting system.
The bargaining chips that I have created are called "Xander bombs.
" Xander bombs are basically "If you vote for me, it's trouble for you.
" - Okay.
So, what do you mean by that? - The biggest so, basically, if someone votes for me, something's going to go wrong for them.
- Red alert.
Shields up.
- [Alarm blaring.]
You could probably see me as the best person to beat Zack - in a gaming Nerd-Off.
- Which is true.
So, I need that to not happen.
In that scenario, I'm going to gridlock it - such that I would be voted in, right? - Mm-hmm.
And Zack and Jack will definitely be voting for Brian, and I and Brian will be voting for Jack.
This creates a gridlock between Brian and Jack.
Those are the two people that you could select.
It would not be Zack.
So, basically, I'm covering my ass all over.
I'm putting a lot of trust in you, Kayla, because I'm giving you all of the power.
But you're doing it in a very threatening way, and I'm not cool with that.
I have to cover my ass.
You're the only one that has immunity.
And I'm telling you that my opinion right now is you say all your little bombs and basically your threats, it's like, "hmm.
" I never had considered truly putting Xander up, but if you're willing to play this care nod on m where is the trust? I do not like the fact you are basically telling me who I have to vote for right now.
You can vote for whoever you want.
I'm just saying if you want me to cooperate, these are my terms.
In the "Star Trek: Voyager" episode "Equinox", Janeway and Chakotay get head-to-head when Chakotay doesn't like what Janeway's about to do.
I believe this is our "Equinox" moment.
You're telling me I have to vote one way so that you get the votes.
You've actually probably hurt yourself more by coming to me with this plan.
Xander: I need to play this like a "World of Warcraft" player carefully going into a raid.
Instead, I Leeroy Jenkins'd all over the breakfast table.
Awkward.
[Chuckles.]
Curtis: Calling all nerds! Please join us in the throne room! Kayla: This is a very peculiar position to be in.
If captain Janeway was placed against a wall like I just was, she would change all her game plans and still get the outcome that she wants.
Today, two nerds go head-to-head in our Nerd-Off.
The winner will stay to compete for $100,000 and the right to sit atop the throne of games! The loser goes home immediately.
Kayla, as the winner of this week's Nerd War, you have the power to choose one nerd to go into the Nerd-Off.
That is correct.
Xander: I made a bad move.
Hopefully it wasn't devastating.
It just depends on Kayla.
Who did you chose? I have formulated what I hope happens, but I have four unpredictable guys who are all ready to stab each other in the back, so my goal is to keep around the people I feel I have a greater chance of taking out and take that throne for myself.
I can almost taste it.
I chose Jack.
Xander: It's a huge sigh of relief.
My name has never been mentioned in the throne room, and I want to keep it that way.
So, Jack, you are going into the Nerd-Off.
I guess I am.
Kayla: Jack has the ability to learn really quickly, and he is brilliant when it comes to his sciences.
I'm afraid to have to go against that.
Jack, your brain is scary.
- [Chuckles.]
- All right.
Hopefully it saves me today.
Xander, Brian, Jack, and Zack, you have voted, and your tallies are here.
The first vote Is for Zack.
The second vote Is for Brian.
The third vote Brian.
The final vote Is for Zack.
Wow! It's a tie.
- Kayla.
- Yes.
As the winner of this week's Nerd War, you have the power to break this tie.
I'm trusting that Kayla's going to stay true to our tight bond, but anything could happen.
Who is the second nerd to go into the Nerd-Off? [Sighs.]
Zack: I just hope that Kayla understands that, honestly, if this is a live-gaming challenge again, that would most likely eliminate Brian, who is a very, very strong competitor, and she could be having the same thought processes that I'm having.
I'm gonna have to choose Zack.
The threats are Jack and Zack.
I am not keeping Brian and Xander around just because they're former Titans with me.
As former teammates, I know their strengths and weaknesses a little bit better, and I feel like I can take them out in an individual game.
It's a story fitting for all the operas out there.
But, Jack, we're gonna be at each other's throats, - you hear me? - I know.
I know.
This one's gonna be good.
This is gonna be good.
Don't worry.
Jack, Zack, step forward, please.
Bend the knee.
Bobby: For today's final Nerd-Off, you will be embroiled in a game we call "Angry Nerds.
" Oh.
Inside the radioshack lab, you will find everything you need to create a miniature structure, which, when scaled up to life size, will be able to withstand a barrage of "Angry Nerd" projectiles.
May the best nerd win.
- All right.
It comes to this.
- Jack.
Jack.
You want to do it one more time? - Yeah.
- One more time? - Ready? - Yeah.
Both: Midas Touch Attack! Zack: [Chuckles.]
Okay.
Let's go.
Zack: I couldn't write a more epic showdown here.
This is like bum-bum buh-bu-u-u-m! - Well, they're growing up so fast.
- I tell you.
- Zack: All right, Jack.
- Jack: Wait.
We have different colors.
Oh, 'cause we're individual now, so it's just our individual portraits.
Zack: I deserve to be in the final four.
I've survived three freaking Nerd-Offs.
There's no one else in Nerdvana who could have done that before except Genevieve, and Genevieve was, like, the most badass participant to ever be in Nerdvana.
So, these are your nerds.
- Is this how much you have of the big stuff? - Uh-huh.
Essentially they have to build structures complete with little and big nerds and then fire air cannons at each other's structures trying to knock down the most nerds.
First of all, I want to make sure that he can't get it in one shot.
- Keep that guy up there.
- Mm-hmm.
Jack: Mathematically, what I'm trying to do is maximize the distance between two balls.
Also, structural-wise, my foundation is based off a normal bricklaying standard where you're supposed to stagger your blocks together because when you stagger your blocks together, it's harder and harder to knock one down.
Ooh, yeah.
This is pretty strong.
Okay, twilly, so, we got to figure this one out.
This one's off by like a centimeter, so it doesn't actually stand correctly.
It's gonna prove to be quite a problem, twilly.
[Chuckles.]
Zack: I love twilly.
He's from the adventurequest games, and he's like one of my favorite little characters.
So, he's been sort of healing me and giving me little advice.
He doesn't talk, though.
That would be deranged.
It has a chance to fall.
What happens if it does fall? The entire thing collapses.
No! No one really helped me with this Nerd-Off today, but I didn't really ask for help.
Interesting.
I have an I.
Q.
of 146.
I'm constantly using it to tackle things and then think about them on a very internal level and try to solve problems with my head.
Hell, he could actually spend time trying to knock that one ove thinking it's going to make the whole thing tumble.
I don't know if Jack has come up with anything more brilliant than my wall, and if he hasn't, that means there's actually a chance that this can just come down to the shooting.
In that situation, I might have a much better Well, excuse the pun, but shot.
I would say that's the weakest area, and - Oh! - Kayla: [Chuckles.]
I want to playpong beer with yo.
Jack: This is gonna be an epic showdown.
I think we are two of the strongest competitors in the house, and if we have to go out like this, this is our swan song, so May the best nerd win, right? [Grunting laughter.]
- Jack: [Laughs.]
- Zack: Pretty darn cool.
Oh, my God.
It has our faces on them.
Jack: Big audience we have here today.
- He waved at me.
- [Chuckles.]
They get popcorn? Kayla: I'm definitely in the best seat in the house.
I'm watching either Zack leave or Jack leave.
Either way works for me.
Welcome to the final Nerd-Off "Angry Nerds 3D".
[Cheers and applause.]
My wall looks like I wanted it, but now that I'm looking at it next to Jack's, I'm really wishing I had done what he did because it seems that my strategy basically has to be to just try to hit his balls.
At the end of this game, one of you will be going home a very Angry Nerd.
- [Laughter.]
- Oh.
Oh.
You have before you two air cannons with which you may shoot each other's nerds, which are protected in the structures that you have created.
The first person to knock down three balls wins this Nerd-Off.
So, let the games begin! [Cheers and applause.]
We will rock-paper-scissors to see who goes first.
Zack has won every single rock-paper-scissors competition ever on this show.
Disgracing statistics is an intolerable offense.
This could be the biggest rock-paper-scissors ever.
Zack: You know, rock-paper-scissors is an entirely mental game, so preparation is absolutely everything.
You need to sort of clear your mind and try to get inside the other person's head.
Are they a scissors person? Are they a paper person? Sometimes I'll give them a little grimace, a little intimidation.
Then I just look kind of deranged when I do that for too long.
You may proceed.
Okay.
Rock, paper, scissors.
Shoot.
[Groans.]
Ah.
[Chuckles.]
Undefeated.
Xander: I cannot believe that this kid has won again Especially because he picks scissors every time, people! For the forsaken! Zack, do you want to go first or second? First.
Of course he will.
Brian: Zack's chosen to go first, which means he's sacrificing the ability to watch Jack fire the cannon.
If Zack goes home, we've eliminated the strongest and most resilient player there is.
[Grunting laughter.]
Zack, you may launch.
Let's see how this thing feels.
Zack: I have no idea how to actually aim one of these properly.
[Grunting laughter.]
And my only experience with air cannons is, I believe we fired pumpkins before.
I don't know what I'm gonna do with this.
[Air blasts.]
Oh, wow, it goes really high.
Bobby: [Chuckles.]
[Grunting laughter.]
Jack.
Jack: I think Zack has a lot of flaws in his structure because if I can knock down enough of his pillars, that can crumble all his entire wall, which is not a very optimal way to do it.
[Grunting laughter.]
[Air blasts.]
[Grunting laughter.]
Come on, I go in between the pillars.
I should get points for that.
I mean, at least I wasn't like 10 feet over like Zack was.
Zack, launch your projectiles at Jack's balls! [Laughter.]
Lovely.
That is what I shall do.
[Air blasts.]
Ho! Whoa! [Applause.]
A direct hit! Wow.
Jack: You just hit my ball straight on.
That was a lucky shot, and you know it.
Bobby: Jack, you may launch.
[Grunting laughter.]
- [Air blasts.]
- Curtis: Oh! Zack: But the thing here is actually reduces the structural integrity of my entire build.
It's your turn, Zack.
Carry on.
[Air blasts.]
Well, another structure damaged.
Jack, you may launch.
[Air blasts.]
All: Oh! Wow! That was so close! Keep chipping away.
Zack.
[Air blasts.]
Aw.
Kayla: Zack, you got to aim a little higher.
It's called gravity.
Ask Mary Kate.
She'll tell you all about it.
Jack: Because his structure's weaker and weaker, I don't have to actually hit his balls.
I just have to aim for that structure.
Zack, your house is built out of straw.
The big bad wolf me will blow it away.
[Air blasts.]
- All: Oh! - Bobby: Wow! Beautiful.
That's one way to get the ball down.
[Laughter.]
One ball for Zack, and one for Jack.
Zack, it's time to look at those faces and imagine they're talking smack to you.
[Laughter.]
[Air blasts.]
And another one! Very nicely done, Zack.
Thank you.
So, Zack is now ahead 2 to 1.
Okay, Jack.
Your turn to even the score.
- [Air blasts.]
- All: Oh! So, he almost got that ball off.
All right, Zack, knock off one more ball, and you have won.
[Air blasts.]
Wow.
Damn it.
That was quite a hit.
Zack, my structure has what your upper body lacks strength.
Ow, ow, ow! Oh, he hurt his back.
- Jack, you feeling the pressure? - Oh, yeah.
You may launch.
[Air blasts.]
- And another one goes down! - [Cheers and applause.]
That's one way to do it.
The score is now 2-all.
The next ball to fall wins this Nerd-Off.
Go ahead, Zack.
If he makes this shot, Zack will win and keep his dream of sitting atop the throne of games alive.
Jack: Zack can win right here, but all my balls are little balls, they're very low, and they're very hard to hit.
[Grunting laughter.]
- [Air blasts.]
- Oh! [Grunting laughter.]
Curtis: With the score tied at 2, whoever knocks down the next ball will win this Nerd-Off.
- [Air blasts.]
- Oh! That was a close one.
I am, like, kind of surprised I missed that one.
I think Jack's feeling the pressure.
I think everyone is.
I mean, you could hear a pin drop in this room - if we weren't talking.
- That's correct.
I feel a little bit of pressure coming on, but I also feel that I have the huge upper hand in this.
Zack's ball's hanging by a thread.
Any slight disturbance will destroy it.
[Air blasts.]
- [Cheers and applause.]
- And another one comes down! [Grunts.]
Good job.
Xander: The final ball falls, and so does Zack's reign of terror in the Nerd-Offs.
[Sighs.]
Okay.
He's not freaking out.
I guess I can be okay with that.
Maybe he has learned something here in Nerdvana.
Jack, you have won this Nerd-Off.
- [Applause.]
- Bobby: Congratulations, Jack.
You better freakin' win that crown now, you hear me? I know, I know.
I'm feeling great.
I'm in the final four.
I put myself into a position to win $100,000, and I beat my frenemy.
Whoo-hoo! Zack, your tale of survival here at Nerdvana has become epic.
Yes.
But like all great tales, it has come to an end, but we anticipate the next chapter not only of your life, but of the books that you are destined to write.
Thank you.
[Applause.]
Zack: I am sad to be going home.
I really wanted to make it into the final four, and I really feel that, just by definition, I'm King of the Nerds.
I'm the person who was voted into the most Nerd-Offs and the person who demonstrated the most skill overall.
Did I win the title? I I guess not.
I'll always consider you guys my friends.
Likewise.
You're a fierce competitor.
- [Laughing.]
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Zack, we had a long journey, man.
- It was great.
- Yes, we did.
So, I mean, I will miss you, and, yeah, you will be my friend.
Yes.
Thank you.
All right.
Okay.
Do your damndest to win this for me, okay? All right, sure.
I will win for you.
I'll see you guys sometime.
Brian: While Zack may not have been great in stature, I think it is appropriate to call Jack a giant slayer.
Zack loomed large in Nerdvana and usually for the wrong reasons.
Jack, you may not become King of the Nerds, but you have taken out a formidable opponent.
Don't forget to be awesome.
Representin'.
- D.
F.
T.
B.
A.
- D.
F.
T.
B.
A.
Kayla: See you.
[Applause.]
Whew! Seven weeks ago, 11 nerds came to Nerdvana.
Now there are just four.
Remember, only the nerdiest can wear the crown.
You may go.
Kayla: Thank you, gentlemen.
Come on, boys.
Let's go have some fun.
Screw the fantastic four.
We're the final four.
Zack: I think in any group, you're going to end up with the outcast.
I did become that for this game, but it doesn't matter what other people think.
I was always happy with being myself.
And I must say that what myself is, I think, is pretty spectacular, so I think I'm a pretty good self.
Victory for Sylvanas! [Both laugh.]
Midas Touch Attack jumped their way to victory.
Yes! You were the man! Winning the nerd-war for the first time in 5 weeks.
Guess who's not going home tomorrow? The Titans of Rigel found themselves in an unfamiliar position.
The Titans now know what it feels like to lose.
I'm gonna take a moment and compose my thoughts.
Kayla used her to stay out of the nerd-off.
I think it'd be in the best interest for the whole team, if we vote for Brian, and Instead, Brian and Chris space-battled for superiority.
I took those ships down! Blast! Blast! And Brian blew Chris away.
Victory for Brian, and all of the hobbits that he leads.
The final five nerds were shocked to learn that the teams were disolved.
From here on out, it's every nerd for himself.
It's suddenly become real.
And Chris' hopes of being crowned King of the Nerds, vaporized.
Jack: Brian, congratulations.
- Yeah, that was awesome.
- Very impressive, Brian.
Some pretty sharp shooting, Tex.
Brian: Yeah, I don't know where that came from.
I am a tangled jumble of emotions.
I'm relieved.
I'm really hungry.
To Chris.
To Chris.
To Chris.
I just can't relish kicking Chris out.
- We are the top five.
- We're the final five.
We survived high school, and now we're surviving Nerdvana.
[Laughter.]
Zack: Equal challenges, perhaps.
[Laughter.]
Xander: While we still hold purple and gold close to our hearts, there really is no more team.
Not only has the game changed into, like, individual mode, but it's changed social dynamics a lot.
Well, I'm glad that you're still here.
No.
While I loved the titans of rigel, they're dead.
I've got to play for Xander now as the Titan of Xander.
We're just five individual nerds competing.
Well, four individual nerds and one king.
I will fight you for the title of King of the Nerds! No teams.
All chaos.
Whoo-hoo! Lunge.
Oh! Yeah, I'd be dead if it was a real sword 'cause that hurt already.
Sheesh! Zack: We're all sword fighting and joking around, but I know at the back of our heads, we all want to be the one stabbing each other for reals.
Yah! Get him! Finish him off! Kayla: I'm surrounded by a bunch of little guys with fake swords.
Oh, darn it! My gloves are off, boys.
It's bare-knuckle time.
Zack: I'd be okay with whoever of us, honestly, wins this competition right now, you know? Really, I think we are all kings and queens in our own right, and, obviously, only one of us can win this, but, you know, it's not like there's a kind of nerd that's better than another kind of nerd, you know? Well, there is one nerd that's better than the other.
A "Star Trek" nerd hands down is better than a "Star Trek" nerd.
[Laughter.]
- [Siren wailing.]
- Calling all nerds! Please join us in the courtyard! You're getting really good at that.
Xander: I am excited and a little bit nervous to find out what this Nerd War is today.
I have confidence in my skills that I'll be a strong player.
I shall reign supreme as king of Nerdvana.
[Laughs evilly.]
[Clears throat.]
Still working on the laugh.
Welcome to the first individual Nerd War.
- All right.
- Whoo-hoo.
As you know, your teams have been dissolved.
So, you're not gonna be needing those banners anymore! All: Oh! [Chuckles.]
Seeing the banners drop is blasphemy.
You shouldn't let those touch the ground, man.
You are now on your own.
Whew! And the best thing to play by yourself is video games.
Ah! That's right.
It is live-gaming week at Nerdvana! [Applause.]
I'm "World of Warcraft" top 25, Fury Warrior in Cataclysm.
I am amazing.
I am a super-hardcore gamer.
I play to about 140% of my simulated numbers, which at first sounds utterly illogical and impossible, but it's just how good I am at video games.
You will be living the dream inside a full-scale, live-action video-racing game known as "Nerdio Karts.
" [Laughter.]
Kayla: Oh, yes! I love vehicles.
I live my life a quarter mile at a time.
Whoever wins this individual Nerd War will be safe from banishment in this week's Nerd-Off and also will get the right to pick one person to go into the Nerd-Off.
The remaining four people will vote on the other person.
Brian: It worries me that this is video-games week, and Zack is a video gamer.
He may just pull another one out yet.
Meet us at the game grid.
You have three hours.
- All right.
- Let's go.
- On your marks.
- [Imitating motor.]
[Imitating motor.]
[Laughing.]
Kayla, this is the closest you're gonna get - to a fix-my-car Nerd War.
- [Chuckles.]
This sucks, because I've never driven a car before.
I can't even ride a bicycle.
I used to know how to ride a bicycle, then I forgot, and now I fall down whenever I try to ride a bike.
So, like, which side is the gas on? Oh, wait.
In an actual car? I've never touched cars or anything.
Kayla: I've seen his coordination with a sword.
I think it's good that he doesn't drive.
I'll hit you! Take this! Take that one! And another! Xander: I'm doing a lot of research with go-kart racing in general.
I don't really know if we're going to be driving a car or if we're gonna be remote-controlling a car or if it will be just a video game.
I'm a gamer, so whatever they throw at me, I'm gonna be good at it.
This is another one of those things where I have so much experience in, like, building cars and stuff.
That'd be really embarrassing to fail this one.
Meanwhile, I'm going to look up which one is the gas pedal.
- Brian: Good luck.
- Uh-huh.
Zack: The individual challenge sucks the problem is, here, I know I'm going to lose this one because I have none of these skills.
I've never done anything like this.
I haven't driven before, because I never got my license.
I was busy writing books and stuff.
The grid a digital frontier.
I tried to picture the nerds as bundles of information as they moved through the computer.
What did they look like? Were the circuits like freeways? I kept dreaming of a world I knew that I would never see.
And then the nerds They entered it.
Welcome to the game grid.
Brian: Bobby and Curtis knew what they were talking about.
I'm actually inside Tron.
I feel like a toaster.
Now, you will each be piloting your own Nerdio Kart in a race lasting 12 laps.
First place gets you 5,000 points, second place 4,000, and so on.
There are bonus stars around the racetrack that light up randomly and are worth 250 points each when you drive over them.
Curtis: The points you collect when running over stars can make a difference in your final score no matter how you place in the race.
Bobby: Your karts have been randomly assigned a starting position.
Please find the kart with your picture on it.
Nerds, you may mount your machines.
Xander: Obviously my skills in "Mario Kart" will transfer over to real life, [Chuckles.]
right? Kayla: I'm playing against a couple of gamers Zack and Xander.
But you know what? This is not a video game.
This is real life, and I'm ready to fight in real life.
Zack: I'm an extremely competitive human being, and I'm a gamer.
Gamers don't give up about things.
We just don't.
[As Mario.]
Let's go.
I'm gonna win.
Tron Tron Kitty! Ready Set Go, nerd racers! Go! Xander: The only way to guarantee not going into the Nerd-Off is to win this race.
Kayla: [Chuckles.]
I love cars.
If I need to go relax or something, I change oil.
Sometimes that is therapy.
Tron Tron Kitty! Brian: Pom Tron Kitty is in probably her least revealing outfit yet.
I'm gratified.
Ready Set Go, nerd racers! Go! And they're off.
A little tentative at the start, but that may be because Zack is in that pole position, and that means the driver without a license is setting the pace here.
Bobby: Xander looks like he's waiting for his chance to make a pass, but Zack is holding him off.
Zack: I am winning right now.
I'm doing fantastically well.
Apparently, I'm just a total natural at this.
That is Zack in the lead.
Xander: The hardest thing about driving this kart is getting the timing down between braking and accelerating.
It's all about timing.
[Tires screech, crash.]
Whoa! Pile-up.
Kayla: I see Zack skid out, and I instantly go for that little space.
Stay out of my way, boys.
Here comes Kayla.
Zack: Oh, this is stupid.
I don't know what I'm doing at all.
[Thud.]
It.
And everyone's back on the road again.
Kayla is our new leader with Jack, it looks like, in second place.
Everyone's getting more used to their Nerdio Karts Picking up the pace here.
Still a long way to go, but everyone wants that first-place finish.
Oh! And Xander clips the wall trying to pass Brian.
These nerds are not fooling around.
Oh! And Xander threads the needle between Brian and Zack to take third place.
- What a move! - Brian: Ooh, sorry.
Ouch.
Brian clips the rear bumper of Zack and falls into last place.
Right now I am driving slower than my old 56k modem.
Look at how far ahead is.
Come on, boys! Follow the leader! Whoo! 10 laps remaining.
Brian: This is not just a pure racing game.
We have these bonus stars to hit.
Even though we may end up in a lower place than somebody else, if we hit enough bonuses, we could still pop them.
250 for Brian.
My God, it's full of stars.
And the bonus stars are beginning to appear at random around the course.
Whoa! And there's another one.
Jack just hit one of the bonus points.
Kayla: I'm coming up on Brian.
I'm trying to get past him Brian: Whoa! And I clip him.
Sorry.
War is war.
There goes Jack.
There goes Jack.
He's looking good.
Jack: I'm a little bit behind, but I'm at least not like Brian or Zack.
They seem they went Oh, God.
I need an ana Okay, give me two seconds to think of an analogy, okay? - Brian: Ooh, sorry! - Zack: Oh, crap! They're crashing more than Microsoft.
Wha-hoo.
What the hell was that for?! Freaking plowed right into me on purpose.
- [Crash.]
- Whoa! Crap! Xander: I see some pretty bad wipe-outs, and it's just a knee-jerk reaction.
I stop and see if they're okay.
What a stupid move that was! Curse my bleeding heart.
Curtis: Oh! Whoa! Big pile-up.
Very aggressive driving.
Jack: I just passed Zack, and Zack crashes into me.
Learn how to drive, rookie.
An Asian just told you to drive better.
[Thud.]
Zack: Oh, God dang! It's like he's never driven.
Bobby: The game grid is alive with action, Curtis.
Being inside the game is really the only way to play.
Three laps to go, Robert.
And here goes Kayla again.
She is just burning this track.
Kayla: Whoo-hoo-hoo! "Warp speed, Mr.
Sulu!" There goes Brian Hotly pursued by Zack.
Warp speed.
This is the last lap.
Xander: I'm in second place.
I see the white blur up ahead that is Kayla, and I try my damndest to get up to her.
I'm still trying to collect stars, because, in my mind, I'm thinking if I get second place, maybe I can get enough stars to pass her.
It's too hard to tell who's gonna win this.
No, it's all gonna come down to the bonus points, Robert.
There's Tron Tron Kitty with the checkered flag, and it's Kayla first, Xander a close second, and the rest of the field hoping they have enough bonus points.
Jack in third, Zack in fourth, and, finally, Brian in last place.
Kayla: Getting the fastest time is a huge relief, but it's not over yet.
Please have the most stars.
Please have the most stars.
We have the results.
Combining your bonus stars and the position you finished in the race, in last place with the least amount of points Brian.
Brian: Am I embarrassed to come in last place in a racing game? Not really.
Am I embarrassed to lose to somebody who doesn't have a driver's license? Little bit.
In fourth place Zack.
Zack: It's utterly unfair.
Right at the beginning of the race, Xander hits me and sends me into a tailspin.
Immediately afterward, Kayla hits me.
After that, Brian hits me.
This is just stupid.
Jack hits me and throws me into a wall.
I was rear-ended by Xander.
Kayla hits me a second time, and as she goes by, I hear her laughing What the hell? In third place It was Jack.
Now it all comes down to Kayla and Xander.
[Exhales.]
Kayla, you had the fastest time, and that gives you 5,000 points.
Thank you.
Xander, you came in second, and that gives you 4,000 points.
Curtis: It will all come down to how many bonus points you picked up along the way.
With 1,750 extra bonus points [Exhales.]
Seven stars Now it all comes down to Kayla and Xander.
With 1,750 extra bonus points [Exhales.]
Kayla, you have won this Nerd War and are free from banishment for the week.
It's all for my grandpa, who taught me how to drive and to build.
I remember sitting there handing tools while my grandpa was underneath the car.
And as he got older, he had Parkinson's, and before he passed away, I was under the car and he was handing me the tools.
As a reward, you'll be getting a telepresence robot from double robotics worth $2,000.
Oh, my God! On top of that, you will be receiving a second robot to give as a gift to one of the nerds who are standing here.
Oh, my goodness.
I'm gonna go to the person - that kept me on my toes the entire time - [Chuckles.]
And, also, who needs to learn a little more about robotics.
Yes.
Congratulations.
Thank you very much, gentlemen.
I expected Kayla to either give her robot to Xander or me, and the fact that Xander came in second means that he earned it.
Kayla, you alone must decide on one nerd to go into the Nerd-Off.
The other nerd will be voted for by the four of you.
And in the event of a tie, Kayla, you will make the final decision.
And remember the words of Sun Tzu "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
" Now unplug yourselves and back to Nerdvana with you.
Kayla: The decision I have to make It's going to dictate who's in the final four.
But I'm gonna be there for sure.
Zack: It's completely unfair.
Brian hits me and Kayla hits me.
Xander rear-ended my kart.
The only walls I hit were walls I was pushed into.
People kept hitting me on the sides, sending me to the wall.
People hit me in the back, sending me into the wall.
It's unfair.
Jack: Well, good job, Kayla.
- Thank you, guys.
- Pretty sweet.
Thank you.
I'm sorry I took you out, there, man.
I was trying to get you on the inside corner, and then you just came off your drive line.
I was like [Laughter.]
Kayla winning big is probably the second-best thing that could have happened besides me winning.
Kayla is the nerd here that I can trust the most, which is to say that I can trust her a little bit.
Brian: Good job.
Good job.
Thank you, guys.
Jack: Kayla has so much power right now, and I think I'm the prime target for elimination after Zack, so I have to do some serious diplomacy.
- You kept me on the toes.
I didn't realize.
- Oh, my goodness.
[Both scream.]
Oh, Kayla, I got to say, thank you so much for picking me.
I'm just super grateful that Kayla thought to pick me, and she made the right choice.
[Chuckles.]
Okay, robots, what do I do? This face is gonna be on a robot wheeling around America.
This is the fanciest thing I've ever played with in my life.
This is pretty darn awesome.
[Chuckles.]
Hello, everyone.
My prize is off the hook.
- Hey, what's up? - [Chuckles.]
- How are you? - I'm good.
Xander: It is amazing.
I can communicate with them.
They can see my face.
I can go left and right, forward and backward.
It really does feel like a video game, only it's happening in real life.
That is a pretty kick-ass reward.
I don't really get it, to be honest.
I'm pretty sure that even though this is an individual game, there are still alliances, and that's how this game always works.
Kayla's putting one of us in, certainly.
But I don't know what she's actually gonna do, though.
Jack: It's not a very optimal situation.
Got some popcorn in my nose.
There we go.
If Kayla wants to win, is it optimal for her to put one of you in? To be honest, the person with the highest chance of winning the game is probably you.
With this final vote upon us, politics is afoot.
Now it's time for us to all make like 19th-century European diplomats and play the great game.
How do you think voting's gonna happen? Well, first, it all depends on your vote.
So, who do you think you're gonna vote for, then? Who do you think Kayla will pick? So, what are your thoughts on the Nerd-Off? What are you thinking about right now? I assume that you have certain ideas.
What I decide to do actually might not be what everyone's expecting me to do.
I thought so.
Kayla: It's an individual game.
An alliance won't help out much.
But we don't know what's gonna happen, so if there's going to be another final Nerd-Off where votes are going to be tallied, an alliance and friendships will possibly help me to be King of the Nerds.
I'm going off of the assumption that you have voted Zack in.
That's just what I had to base my plan off of.
Zack and Jack have a vote, and they're going to vote for Brian, most likely.
- 'Cause you're the gamer.
- 'Cause they won't vote for me.
If I stand with Brian, it's a gridlock, and that gives you all the power because Brian and I would both vote for Jack.
Kayla: I'm used to being surrounded by guys.
But I'm not used to all their attention being focused on me.
Brian: I think that the most interesting Nerd-Off, and probably the most benecial for me, anyway, would be Zack versus Xander.
There's some devious people in this house right now Me among them.
I definitely will tell people who I'm voting for.
Whether or not ithem tell.
You're thinking between either me or Jack for the Nerd-Off.
Is that semi-accurate? [Sighs.]
- Possibly.
- [Chuckles.]
I could also go for another big gamer in this house.
Xander is one of your targets right now, potentially? - He could possibly be.
- Huh.
I just think that Brian would be a pretty dangerous person to, like, have alive at this moment of time.
- Hey, Zack.
Come over.
- Zack: What are we talking about? We're talking about Brian.
Ooh.
If Jack and I vote with Xander, we can avoid the deadlock situation where we just have a tie in our votes and Kayla gets all the power to select a second person.
I was just talking to Kayla, and she actually seems to say that the people on her list are actually more you.
- What?! - If she votes for you, the safest option for you to go in against is probably Brian.
And then if she votes for me, my safest option is definitely Brian.
Xander: If I were to vote for Brian, it would be putting a strong player into the Nerd-Off with a good potential of losing, considering it's gaming.
We're basically fighting for probability points.
And I think the best probability point, for at least the three people here, is Brian.
Yeah.
Xander: I have a proposal for you.
- Brian: Okay.
- Kayla: What do you got? So, we have to put a lot of trust in each other.
I am happy to do that.
I do need some insurance, 'cause, like Batman, - I got to think of all eventualities.
- Yes.
So, I have set up Xander bombs throughout this voting system.
The bargaining chips that I have created are called "Xander bombs.
" Xander bombs are basically "If you vote for me, it's trouble for you.
" - Okay.
So, what do you mean by that? - The biggest so, basically, if someone votes for me, something's going to go wrong for them.
- Red alert.
Shields up.
- [Alarm blaring.]
You could probably see me as the best person to beat Zack - in a gaming Nerd-Off.
- Which is true.
So, I need that to not happen.
In that scenario, I'm going to gridlock it - such that I would be voted in, right? - Mm-hmm.
And Zack and Jack will definitely be voting for Brian, and I and Brian will be voting for Jack.
This creates a gridlock between Brian and Jack.
Those are the two people that you could select.
It would not be Zack.
So, basically, I'm covering my ass all over.
I'm putting a lot of trust in you, Kayla, because I'm giving you all of the power.
But you're doing it in a very threatening way, and I'm not cool with that.
I have to cover my ass.
You're the only one that has immunity.
And I'm telling you that my opinion right now is you say all your little bombs and basically your threats, it's like, "hmm.
" I never had considered truly putting Xander up, but if you're willing to play this care nod on m where is the trust? I do not like the fact you are basically telling me who I have to vote for right now.
You can vote for whoever you want.
I'm just saying if you want me to cooperate, these are my terms.
In the "Star Trek: Voyager" episode "Equinox", Janeway and Chakotay get head-to-head when Chakotay doesn't like what Janeway's about to do.
I believe this is our "Equinox" moment.
You're telling me I have to vote one way so that you get the votes.
You've actually probably hurt yourself more by coming to me with this plan.
Xander: I need to play this like a "World of Warcraft" player carefully going into a raid.
Instead, I Leeroy Jenkins'd all over the breakfast table.
Awkward.
[Chuckles.]
Curtis: Calling all nerds! Please join us in the throne room! Kayla: This is a very peculiar position to be in.
If captain Janeway was placed against a wall like I just was, she would change all her game plans and still get the outcome that she wants.
Today, two nerds go head-to-head in our Nerd-Off.
The winner will stay to compete for $100,000 and the right to sit atop the throne of games! The loser goes home immediately.
Kayla, as the winner of this week's Nerd War, you have the power to choose one nerd to go into the Nerd-Off.
That is correct.
Xander: I made a bad move.
Hopefully it wasn't devastating.
It just depends on Kayla.
Who did you chose? I have formulated what I hope happens, but I have four unpredictable guys who are all ready to stab each other in the back, so my goal is to keep around the people I feel I have a greater chance of taking out and take that throne for myself.
I can almost taste it.
I chose Jack.
Xander: It's a huge sigh of relief.
My name has never been mentioned in the throne room, and I want to keep it that way.
So, Jack, you are going into the Nerd-Off.
I guess I am.
Kayla: Jack has the ability to learn really quickly, and he is brilliant when it comes to his sciences.
I'm afraid to have to go against that.
Jack, your brain is scary.
- [Chuckles.]
- All right.
Hopefully it saves me today.
Xander, Brian, Jack, and Zack, you have voted, and your tallies are here.
The first vote Is for Zack.
The second vote Is for Brian.
The third vote Brian.
The final vote Is for Zack.
Wow! It's a tie.
- Kayla.
- Yes.
As the winner of this week's Nerd War, you have the power to break this tie.
I'm trusting that Kayla's going to stay true to our tight bond, but anything could happen.
Who is the second nerd to go into the Nerd-Off? [Sighs.]
Zack: I just hope that Kayla understands that, honestly, if this is a live-gaming challenge again, that would most likely eliminate Brian, who is a very, very strong competitor, and she could be having the same thought processes that I'm having.
I'm gonna have to choose Zack.
The threats are Jack and Zack.
I am not keeping Brian and Xander around just because they're former Titans with me.
As former teammates, I know their strengths and weaknesses a little bit better, and I feel like I can take them out in an individual game.
It's a story fitting for all the operas out there.
But, Jack, we're gonna be at each other's throats, - you hear me? - I know.
I know.
This one's gonna be good.
This is gonna be good.
Don't worry.
Jack, Zack, step forward, please.
Bend the knee.
Bobby: For today's final Nerd-Off, you will be embroiled in a game we call "Angry Nerds.
" Oh.
Inside the radioshack lab, you will find everything you need to create a miniature structure, which, when scaled up to life size, will be able to withstand a barrage of "Angry Nerd" projectiles.
May the best nerd win.
- All right.
It comes to this.
- Jack.
Jack.
You want to do it one more time? - Yeah.
- One more time? - Ready? - Yeah.
Both: Midas Touch Attack! Zack: [Chuckles.]
Okay.
Let's go.
Zack: I couldn't write a more epic showdown here.
This is like bum-bum buh-bu-u-u-m! - Well, they're growing up so fast.
- I tell you.
- Zack: All right, Jack.
- Jack: Wait.
We have different colors.
Oh, 'cause we're individual now, so it's just our individual portraits.
Zack: I deserve to be in the final four.
I've survived three freaking Nerd-Offs.
There's no one else in Nerdvana who could have done that before except Genevieve, and Genevieve was, like, the most badass participant to ever be in Nerdvana.
So, these are your nerds.
- Is this how much you have of the big stuff? - Uh-huh.
Essentially they have to build structures complete with little and big nerds and then fire air cannons at each other's structures trying to knock down the most nerds.
First of all, I want to make sure that he can't get it in one shot.
- Keep that guy up there.
- Mm-hmm.
Jack: Mathematically, what I'm trying to do is maximize the distance between two balls.
Also, structural-wise, my foundation is based off a normal bricklaying standard where you're supposed to stagger your blocks together because when you stagger your blocks together, it's harder and harder to knock one down.
Ooh, yeah.
This is pretty strong.
Okay, twilly, so, we got to figure this one out.
This one's off by like a centimeter, so it doesn't actually stand correctly.
It's gonna prove to be quite a problem, twilly.
[Chuckles.]
Zack: I love twilly.
He's from the adventurequest games, and he's like one of my favorite little characters.
So, he's been sort of healing me and giving me little advice.
He doesn't talk, though.
That would be deranged.
It has a chance to fall.
What happens if it does fall? The entire thing collapses.
No! No one really helped me with this Nerd-Off today, but I didn't really ask for help.
Interesting.
I have an I.
Q.
of 146.
I'm constantly using it to tackle things and then think about them on a very internal level and try to solve problems with my head.
Hell, he could actually spend time trying to knock that one ove thinking it's going to make the whole thing tumble.
I don't know if Jack has come up with anything more brilliant than my wall, and if he hasn't, that means there's actually a chance that this can just come down to the shooting.
In that situation, I might have a much better Well, excuse the pun, but shot.
I would say that's the weakest area, and - Oh! - Kayla: [Chuckles.]
I want to playpong beer with yo.
Jack: This is gonna be an epic showdown.
I think we are two of the strongest competitors in the house, and if we have to go out like this, this is our swan song, so May the best nerd win, right? [Grunting laughter.]
- Jack: [Laughs.]
- Zack: Pretty darn cool.
Oh, my God.
It has our faces on them.
Jack: Big audience we have here today.
- He waved at me.
- [Chuckles.]
They get popcorn? Kayla: I'm definitely in the best seat in the house.
I'm watching either Zack leave or Jack leave.
Either way works for me.
Welcome to the final Nerd-Off "Angry Nerds 3D".
[Cheers and applause.]
My wall looks like I wanted it, but now that I'm looking at it next to Jack's, I'm really wishing I had done what he did because it seems that my strategy basically has to be to just try to hit his balls.
At the end of this game, one of you will be going home a very Angry Nerd.
- [Laughter.]
- Oh.
Oh.
You have before you two air cannons with which you may shoot each other's nerds, which are protected in the structures that you have created.
The first person to knock down three balls wins this Nerd-Off.
So, let the games begin! [Cheers and applause.]
We will rock-paper-scissors to see who goes first.
Zack has won every single rock-paper-scissors competition ever on this show.
Disgracing statistics is an intolerable offense.
This could be the biggest rock-paper-scissors ever.
Zack: You know, rock-paper-scissors is an entirely mental game, so preparation is absolutely everything.
You need to sort of clear your mind and try to get inside the other person's head.
Are they a scissors person? Are they a paper person? Sometimes I'll give them a little grimace, a little intimidation.
Then I just look kind of deranged when I do that for too long.
You may proceed.
Okay.
Rock, paper, scissors.
Shoot.
[Groans.]
Ah.
[Chuckles.]
Undefeated.
Xander: I cannot believe that this kid has won again Especially because he picks scissors every time, people! For the forsaken! Zack, do you want to go first or second? First.
Of course he will.
Brian: Zack's chosen to go first, which means he's sacrificing the ability to watch Jack fire the cannon.
If Zack goes home, we've eliminated the strongest and most resilient player there is.
[Grunting laughter.]
Zack, you may launch.
Let's see how this thing feels.
Zack: I have no idea how to actually aim one of these properly.
[Grunting laughter.]
And my only experience with air cannons is, I believe we fired pumpkins before.
I don't know what I'm gonna do with this.
[Air blasts.]
Oh, wow, it goes really high.
Bobby: [Chuckles.]
[Grunting laughter.]
Jack.
Jack: I think Zack has a lot of flaws in his structure because if I can knock down enough of his pillars, that can crumble all his entire wall, which is not a very optimal way to do it.
[Grunting laughter.]
[Air blasts.]
[Grunting laughter.]
Come on, I go in between the pillars.
I should get points for that.
I mean, at least I wasn't like 10 feet over like Zack was.
Zack, launch your projectiles at Jack's balls! [Laughter.]
Lovely.
That is what I shall do.
[Air blasts.]
Ho! Whoa! [Applause.]
A direct hit! Wow.
Jack: You just hit my ball straight on.
That was a lucky shot, and you know it.
Bobby: Jack, you may launch.
[Grunting laughter.]
- [Air blasts.]
- Curtis: Oh! Zack: But the thing here is actually reduces the structural integrity of my entire build.
It's your turn, Zack.
Carry on.
[Air blasts.]
Well, another structure damaged.
Jack, you may launch.
[Air blasts.]
All: Oh! Wow! That was so close! Keep chipping away.
Zack.
[Air blasts.]
Aw.
Kayla: Zack, you got to aim a little higher.
It's called gravity.
Ask Mary Kate.
She'll tell you all about it.
Jack: Because his structure's weaker and weaker, I don't have to actually hit his balls.
I just have to aim for that structure.
Zack, your house is built out of straw.
The big bad wolf me will blow it away.
[Air blasts.]
- All: Oh! - Bobby: Wow! Beautiful.
That's one way to get the ball down.
[Laughter.]
One ball for Zack, and one for Jack.
Zack, it's time to look at those faces and imagine they're talking smack to you.
[Laughter.]
[Air blasts.]
And another one! Very nicely done, Zack.
Thank you.
So, Zack is now ahead 2 to 1.
Okay, Jack.
Your turn to even the score.
- [Air blasts.]
- All: Oh! So, he almost got that ball off.
All right, Zack, knock off one more ball, and you have won.
[Air blasts.]
Wow.
Damn it.
That was quite a hit.
Zack, my structure has what your upper body lacks strength.
Ow, ow, ow! Oh, he hurt his back.
- Jack, you feeling the pressure? - Oh, yeah.
You may launch.
[Air blasts.]
- And another one goes down! - [Cheers and applause.]
That's one way to do it.
The score is now 2-all.
The next ball to fall wins this Nerd-Off.
Go ahead, Zack.
If he makes this shot, Zack will win and keep his dream of sitting atop the throne of games alive.
Jack: Zack can win right here, but all my balls are little balls, they're very low, and they're very hard to hit.
[Grunting laughter.]
- [Air blasts.]
- Oh! [Grunting laughter.]
Curtis: With the score tied at 2, whoever knocks down the next ball will win this Nerd-Off.
- [Air blasts.]
- Oh! That was a close one.
I am, like, kind of surprised I missed that one.
I think Jack's feeling the pressure.
I think everyone is.
I mean, you could hear a pin drop in this room - if we weren't talking.
- That's correct.
I feel a little bit of pressure coming on, but I also feel that I have the huge upper hand in this.
Zack's ball's hanging by a thread.
Any slight disturbance will destroy it.
[Air blasts.]
- [Cheers and applause.]
- And another one comes down! [Grunts.]
Good job.
Xander: The final ball falls, and so does Zack's reign of terror in the Nerd-Offs.
[Sighs.]
Okay.
He's not freaking out.
I guess I can be okay with that.
Maybe he has learned something here in Nerdvana.
Jack, you have won this Nerd-Off.
- [Applause.]
- Bobby: Congratulations, Jack.
You better freakin' win that crown now, you hear me? I know, I know.
I'm feeling great.
I'm in the final four.
I put myself into a position to win $100,000, and I beat my frenemy.
Whoo-hoo! Zack, your tale of survival here at Nerdvana has become epic.
Yes.
But like all great tales, it has come to an end, but we anticipate the next chapter not only of your life, but of the books that you are destined to write.
Thank you.
[Applause.]
Zack: I am sad to be going home.
I really wanted to make it into the final four, and I really feel that, just by definition, I'm King of the Nerds.
I'm the person who was voted into the most Nerd-Offs and the person who demonstrated the most skill overall.
Did I win the title? I I guess not.
I'll always consider you guys my friends.
Likewise.
You're a fierce competitor.
- [Laughing.]
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Zack, we had a long journey, man.
- It was great.
- Yes, we did.
So, I mean, I will miss you, and, yeah, you will be my friend.
Yes.
Thank you.
All right.
Okay.
Do your damndest to win this for me, okay? All right, sure.
I will win for you.
I'll see you guys sometime.
Brian: While Zack may not have been great in stature, I think it is appropriate to call Jack a giant slayer.
Zack loomed large in Nerdvana and usually for the wrong reasons.
Jack, you may not become King of the Nerds, but you have taken out a formidable opponent.
Don't forget to be awesome.
Representin'.
- D.
F.
T.
B.
A.
- D.
F.
T.
B.
A.
Kayla: See you.
[Applause.]
Whew! Seven weeks ago, 11 nerds came to Nerdvana.
Now there are just four.
Remember, only the nerdiest can wear the crown.
You may go.
Kayla: Thank you, gentlemen.
Come on, boys.
Let's go have some fun.
Screw the fantastic four.
We're the final four.
Zack: I think in any group, you're going to end up with the outcast.
I did become that for this game, but it doesn't matter what other people think.
I was always happy with being myself.
And I must say that what myself is, I think, is pretty spectacular, so I think I'm a pretty good self.
Victory for Sylvanas! [Both laugh.]