The Batman (2004) s02e07 Episode Script
JTV
All right, Joker.
Time for your medicine.
But, my dear flunky, you left the meds outside.
Not the kind of medicine that I had in mind.
Either I'm crazy, or you're melting.
It's payback time, Joker.
You're going to suffer for making me what I am.
I'll take what I deserve, but do I know you? Help! Out of the way, Bats.
Joker has this coming.
No argument there, Clayface.
But I'm not here to help him.
I'm here to help you.
That the best you have, Bats? You're gonna get the help you need.
As for you, Joker, consider yourself Lucky.
Clown about town.
Court is back in session.
Mr.
Brent, you may call your first witness.
Your Honor, the defense calls Detective Ellen Yin.
Detective, your former partner stands accused of resisting arrest and of the kidnapping and aggravated assault of Chief Angel Rojas.
Shouldn't Ethan Bennett be held responsible for these crimes? It isn't that cut-and-dry, Mr.
Brent.
Detective Bennett was also kidnapped by Joker.
He was subjected to intense psychological torment.
And then exposed to unstable chemicals.
Which mutated his body and mind.
Objection! This witness is not qualified to testify to Clayface's state of mind.
Your Honor, I object to the use of the media term, Clayface.
My client has a name.
It is Ethan Bennett.
Objection sustained.
Both of them.
Please state your name and occupation for the record.
Strange.
Professor Hugo Strange.
I am a senior resident at Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.
Mr.
Bennett was clearly psychologically traumatized by our former patient, Joker and by his own transformation.
Traumas he suffered in the line of duty? Precisely.
Temporary insanity, if you will.
I've since had many sessions with Ethan.
I cannot speak for his body but I am convinced he is now of completely sound mind.
I'm Dr.
Mark Desmond, head of Biomed at Wayne Industries.
My team has run a battery of tests over the last three months.
Though tissue samples were extracted we've been unable to devise a cure for Mr.
Bennett's affliction.
However, we've learned that each time Bennett uses his morphic abilities his mutated genes self-replicate.
But those mutating cells quickly fell into remission from lack of use since Mr.
Bennett's capture.
We at Wayne Industries believe that Mr.
Bennett's human side can remain stable as long as he continues to exercise mind over matter.
I've known Ethan since high school.
He's a good man and he's my best friend.
And do you trust him, Mr.
Wayne, even now? Like a brother.
I'm prepared to offer Ethan a job today, as head of security for Wayne Industries.
Ethan Bennett, I'm placing you on probation.
You are to continue your therapy and refrain at all times from the use of your so-called morphic abilities.
You will also be subject to regular chemical testing to ensure that you are obeying the conditions of your probation.
Ethan, that's it.
You're free to go.
First day, Ethan.
Are you nervous? I was a cop for six years, Bruce.
I think I can handle staring at a monitor.
Make that 350 monitors.
All the better to safeguard our top-secret data, our research materials Yeah, not to mention millions of dollars' worth of modern art.
Mr.
Wayne has quite the collection.
Ethan, this is Weber, the day-shit supervisor and our resident art critic.
He reports to you.
- Great to have you aboard, sir.
- Thanks.
And it's Ethan.
Well, I'll leave you to it, then.
- Hey, must be nice.
- Nice? Yeah, having a billionaire buddy.
You know, to fix your mistakes.
I suppose they have assigned you a new partner by now.
Well, not exactly.
I miss it, Yin.
I miss the action.
Helping people, the old, "protect and serve.
" Bennett, don't glamorize it.
The job took its toll on you.
It wasn't just a job, Yin.
It was my identity, my life, who I am.
- Was.
- Clayface.
- They should never have let him out.
- That's him, isn't it? I tell you, Yin some days I wish I could just disappear.
Looks like I'm a little short.
Do you think I can owe you 50 cents? No can do.
Rojas? Go for it, bro.
Idiot.
You want to end up back in a cell? All that work, all those months? Ditching Rojas was kind of cool.
Gotta hold myself together.
That's it.
Gotta keep busy.
Gotta remember who I am.
A daring high-rise gold robbery committed by Joker.
I don't know how that clown got in here, and I'm not sure where he went.
He just stepped all the balcony and disappeared.
This is likely the beginning of yet another Joker crime spree.
The question is, will the crazy crime clown be stopped before someone gets hurt? Gotta remember who I am.
Bennett, you're here early.
Happy to be working.
Mr.
Bennett, I found you.
Time for your court-ordered test, sir.
Right with you, doc.
Fool's gold.
You're through, Joker.
Detective.
Or should I say night watchman.
Oh, so you remember me now? I never forget a face I've tormented.
Speaking of happy days Wait! Stop! Now, tell me these aren't spiffy clodhoppers.
- Joker, listen - To the sound of you going splat? - Great idea.
- No! No! No! No! Think it goes with the shoes? That's a splat.
Joker! Detective Bennett? You're Clayface? You turned me into clay! Funny, I was trying to tum you into dust.
I'm gonna to chop you down to size.
Who you calling tall? TTFN.
âTa-ta for now.
â No! You? What are you doing? I almost had Joker.
Who almost had Joker? Aren't you taking a risk here, Bennett? It's not how it looks, Bats.
Clayface didn't track down Joker.
- Ethan Bennett did.
Clayface just - Reared his ugly head? All right.
Something like that.
Look, Bats, I'm not headed for a meltdown.
This isn't about revenge.
It's about making sure what Joker did to me never happens to anyone else.
Can you understand that? Go home, Bennett.
Leave Joker to me.
I'll cut right to it, Ethan.
Dr.
Desmond showed me your test results.
There's some indication that you've been morphing again.
- Is Desmond gonna bust my parole? - Ethan - Is he? - The results were inconclusive.
And I convinced him not to be hasty.
But, Ethan, your cells are active again.
If you keep this up - you could pass the point of no re - Bruce, I slipped.
For a second.
- It won't happen again.
- I'm not speaking as your boss, Ethan.
I'm speaking as your friend.
We've both seen the news.
Joker's out there.
Yeah, I know.
Destiny.
Wayne's pet freak.
Can't believe he reassigned me to the night shit.
The nightie-night shift.
Joker.
Don't know what it is, but I know what I like.
There's gold in them there hills! Going up.
Joker! Clayface.
Just the do-gooder I was hoping to see.
I'll be the last do-gooder you'll ever see.
Let's dance, drippy.
Sorry, fellas but I have to cut in.
Batman and Clayface? My cup runneth over.
Struggling with your inner demon again, Bennett? Not this time.
The only spot in Wayne Industries without security cameras.
Thought I might just get away with it.
Just didn't count on you getting here quite so fast, Bats.
My, you are good.
I'll just be going.
No fail.
Two against one? We make a pretty good team, Bats.
Give it up, Bennett.
In your case, doing good is an act of self-destruction.
Had a feeling you'd take the highroad, Batman.
Guess it's time we settled our differences.
I'm not your enemy, Bennett.
You are the only one I see standing between me and my freedom.
- You have options.
- Like prison or Arkham? I pick eliminating witnesses.
That's the clay talking, Bennett.
How would you know where Bennett ends and Clayface begins? Saw that coming.
Guess you'll have to learn a new trick, huh, Bats? Chip off the old block.
Go on, son.
Take a little off the top.
- Son? - I made you who you are.
Said so yourself.
And from where I dangle, you make a better villain than vigilante.
Besides, crime pays more.
So come to papa.
Join Team Joker! You have a point.
But Clayface works alone! Wait, what about my cut? - Bennett.
- Who? Oh, they grow up so fast.
Hold it! Whoa, Yin, you wouldn't shoot your old partner, would you? Didn't know you collected modern art.
What do you plan to do with it? Melt it down.
You know, to jump-start my new life.
Bennett, give up.
It's not too late.
Isn't it, Bats? Look, here's the problem as I see it.
Being Ethan Bennett is hard.
Really hard.
Being Clayface is cake.
So say your goodbyes.
This is the last you'll ever see of him.
Now step aside, or I'll mash you both.
Mash anyone who gets in my way! Good to know.
You just made this a whole lot easier.
Didn't expect that from you, Yin.
I guess you do have a new partner.
We've really lost him this time, haven't we, Wayne? Ethan's past the point of no return.
Now only Clayface remains.
Time for your medicine.
But, my dear flunky, you left the meds outside.
Not the kind of medicine that I had in mind.
Either I'm crazy, or you're melting.
It's payback time, Joker.
You're going to suffer for making me what I am.
I'll take what I deserve, but do I know you? Help! Out of the way, Bats.
Joker has this coming.
No argument there, Clayface.
But I'm not here to help him.
I'm here to help you.
That the best you have, Bats? You're gonna get the help you need.
As for you, Joker, consider yourself Lucky.
Clown about town.
Court is back in session.
Mr.
Brent, you may call your first witness.
Your Honor, the defense calls Detective Ellen Yin.
Detective, your former partner stands accused of resisting arrest and of the kidnapping and aggravated assault of Chief Angel Rojas.
Shouldn't Ethan Bennett be held responsible for these crimes? It isn't that cut-and-dry, Mr.
Brent.
Detective Bennett was also kidnapped by Joker.
He was subjected to intense psychological torment.
And then exposed to unstable chemicals.
Which mutated his body and mind.
Objection! This witness is not qualified to testify to Clayface's state of mind.
Your Honor, I object to the use of the media term, Clayface.
My client has a name.
It is Ethan Bennett.
Objection sustained.
Both of them.
Please state your name and occupation for the record.
Strange.
Professor Hugo Strange.
I am a senior resident at Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.
Mr.
Bennett was clearly psychologically traumatized by our former patient, Joker and by his own transformation.
Traumas he suffered in the line of duty? Precisely.
Temporary insanity, if you will.
I've since had many sessions with Ethan.
I cannot speak for his body but I am convinced he is now of completely sound mind.
I'm Dr.
Mark Desmond, head of Biomed at Wayne Industries.
My team has run a battery of tests over the last three months.
Though tissue samples were extracted we've been unable to devise a cure for Mr.
Bennett's affliction.
However, we've learned that each time Bennett uses his morphic abilities his mutated genes self-replicate.
But those mutating cells quickly fell into remission from lack of use since Mr.
Bennett's capture.
We at Wayne Industries believe that Mr.
Bennett's human side can remain stable as long as he continues to exercise mind over matter.
I've known Ethan since high school.
He's a good man and he's my best friend.
And do you trust him, Mr.
Wayne, even now? Like a brother.
I'm prepared to offer Ethan a job today, as head of security for Wayne Industries.
Ethan Bennett, I'm placing you on probation.
You are to continue your therapy and refrain at all times from the use of your so-called morphic abilities.
You will also be subject to regular chemical testing to ensure that you are obeying the conditions of your probation.
Ethan, that's it.
You're free to go.
First day, Ethan.
Are you nervous? I was a cop for six years, Bruce.
I think I can handle staring at a monitor.
Make that 350 monitors.
All the better to safeguard our top-secret data, our research materials Yeah, not to mention millions of dollars' worth of modern art.
Mr.
Wayne has quite the collection.
Ethan, this is Weber, the day-shit supervisor and our resident art critic.
He reports to you.
- Great to have you aboard, sir.
- Thanks.
And it's Ethan.
Well, I'll leave you to it, then.
- Hey, must be nice.
- Nice? Yeah, having a billionaire buddy.
You know, to fix your mistakes.
I suppose they have assigned you a new partner by now.
Well, not exactly.
I miss it, Yin.
I miss the action.
Helping people, the old, "protect and serve.
" Bennett, don't glamorize it.
The job took its toll on you.
It wasn't just a job, Yin.
It was my identity, my life, who I am.
- Was.
- Clayface.
- They should never have let him out.
- That's him, isn't it? I tell you, Yin some days I wish I could just disappear.
Looks like I'm a little short.
Do you think I can owe you 50 cents? No can do.
Rojas? Go for it, bro.
Idiot.
You want to end up back in a cell? All that work, all those months? Ditching Rojas was kind of cool.
Gotta hold myself together.
That's it.
Gotta keep busy.
Gotta remember who I am.
A daring high-rise gold robbery committed by Joker.
I don't know how that clown got in here, and I'm not sure where he went.
He just stepped all the balcony and disappeared.
This is likely the beginning of yet another Joker crime spree.
The question is, will the crazy crime clown be stopped before someone gets hurt? Gotta remember who I am.
Bennett, you're here early.
Happy to be working.
Mr.
Bennett, I found you.
Time for your court-ordered test, sir.
Right with you, doc.
Fool's gold.
You're through, Joker.
Detective.
Or should I say night watchman.
Oh, so you remember me now? I never forget a face I've tormented.
Speaking of happy days Wait! Stop! Now, tell me these aren't spiffy clodhoppers.
- Joker, listen - To the sound of you going splat? - Great idea.
- No! No! No! No! Think it goes with the shoes? That's a splat.
Joker! Detective Bennett? You're Clayface? You turned me into clay! Funny, I was trying to tum you into dust.
I'm gonna to chop you down to size.
Who you calling tall? TTFN.
âTa-ta for now.
â No! You? What are you doing? I almost had Joker.
Who almost had Joker? Aren't you taking a risk here, Bennett? It's not how it looks, Bats.
Clayface didn't track down Joker.
- Ethan Bennett did.
Clayface just - Reared his ugly head? All right.
Something like that.
Look, Bats, I'm not headed for a meltdown.
This isn't about revenge.
It's about making sure what Joker did to me never happens to anyone else.
Can you understand that? Go home, Bennett.
Leave Joker to me.
I'll cut right to it, Ethan.
Dr.
Desmond showed me your test results.
There's some indication that you've been morphing again.
- Is Desmond gonna bust my parole? - Ethan - Is he? - The results were inconclusive.
And I convinced him not to be hasty.
But, Ethan, your cells are active again.
If you keep this up - you could pass the point of no re - Bruce, I slipped.
For a second.
- It won't happen again.
- I'm not speaking as your boss, Ethan.
I'm speaking as your friend.
We've both seen the news.
Joker's out there.
Yeah, I know.
Destiny.
Wayne's pet freak.
Can't believe he reassigned me to the night shit.
The nightie-night shift.
Joker.
Don't know what it is, but I know what I like.
There's gold in them there hills! Going up.
Joker! Clayface.
Just the do-gooder I was hoping to see.
I'll be the last do-gooder you'll ever see.
Let's dance, drippy.
Sorry, fellas but I have to cut in.
Batman and Clayface? My cup runneth over.
Struggling with your inner demon again, Bennett? Not this time.
The only spot in Wayne Industries without security cameras.
Thought I might just get away with it.
Just didn't count on you getting here quite so fast, Bats.
My, you are good.
I'll just be going.
No fail.
Two against one? We make a pretty good team, Bats.
Give it up, Bennett.
In your case, doing good is an act of self-destruction.
Had a feeling you'd take the highroad, Batman.
Guess it's time we settled our differences.
I'm not your enemy, Bennett.
You are the only one I see standing between me and my freedom.
- You have options.
- Like prison or Arkham? I pick eliminating witnesses.
That's the clay talking, Bennett.
How would you know where Bennett ends and Clayface begins? Saw that coming.
Guess you'll have to learn a new trick, huh, Bats? Chip off the old block.
Go on, son.
Take a little off the top.
- Son? - I made you who you are.
Said so yourself.
And from where I dangle, you make a better villain than vigilante.
Besides, crime pays more.
So come to papa.
Join Team Joker! You have a point.
But Clayface works alone! Wait, what about my cut? - Bennett.
- Who? Oh, they grow up so fast.
Hold it! Whoa, Yin, you wouldn't shoot your old partner, would you? Didn't know you collected modern art.
What do you plan to do with it? Melt it down.
You know, to jump-start my new life.
Bennett, give up.
It's not too late.
Isn't it, Bats? Look, here's the problem as I see it.
Being Ethan Bennett is hard.
Really hard.
Being Clayface is cake.
So say your goodbyes.
This is the last you'll ever see of him.
Now step aside, or I'll mash you both.
Mash anyone who gets in my way! Good to know.
You just made this a whole lot easier.
Didn't expect that from you, Yin.
I guess you do have a new partner.
We've really lost him this time, haven't we, Wayne? Ethan's past the point of no return.
Now only Clayface remains.