Casual (2015) s02e08 Episode Script
The Magpie
1 ALEX: Previously, on "Casual" VALERIE: Jack came by the office.
For a session? More like a date under the guise of a session.
He always loves a grand gesture.
- It was charming.
- JENNIFER: [sighs.]
I just don't want to see you get hurt.
LAURA: I think we should have sex with Spencer.
Oh, are you serious? I mean, the kid's dying.
It's the least we could do.
One night we do whatever we want with him and that's it.
JENNIFER: Oh, Jack also asked for your number.
VALERIE: Game night Jack? JENNIFER: I didn't give it to him.
He's not housebroken.
Tighten up, will you? Your performance is all over the place.
Wait, what? FALLON: Your little act for Sarah.
It's fine.
I'm doing the same thing with Jordan.
ALEX: You and Jordan? [dramatic music.]
[knocking on door.]
Sorry, I have the wrong room.
[Chuck Jackson's "Any Day Now" playing.]
[mellow instrumental music.]
CHUCK JACKSON: Any day now I will hear you say Goodbye, my love And you'll be on your way Then my wild, beautiful bird You will have flown Oh Any day now I'll be all alone What? Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
You heard that, huh? Were you performing an exorcism? I love when they communicate, but volume is basically uncontrollable.
Totally.
It's not like you could just ask her to be respectful of the other people sleeping here.
I tried to put my hand over her mouth, but then she started panting and I couldn't tell if she liked it or was having trouble breathing, so I stopped.
- What a gentleman.
- Yeah.
That much noise is incredibly validating.
I'm fucking my self-esteem to new heights.
Who was she anyway? Someone in need.
A charity fuck? Just a girl who wanted to be loved.
Feels good to help people, doesn't it? Yeah, it does.
You have fun with your friends? Mm, yeah.
Well, good morning, Val.
Mm.
Who won out? Jack or the good doctor? [light instrumental music.]
- Hey.
- Hmm? The power of Christ compels you.
The power of Christ [elevator dings.]
[sighs.]
Thank fucking God.
I've been waiting for eight minutes.
I was about to text my mother.
Do you know what she said yesterday? I do not know, Elle, but why don't you come on inside and tell me all about it? ELLE: It was so bad.
I think she's dying or she thinks she's dying.
Why were you late? Fuck.
LAURA: What about the UCs? AUBREY: I like Berkeley.
LAURA: It's hard to get in.
UCLA? It's too close to home.
Liberal arts school? Hmm.
Those are tough.
They're country clubs.
Yeah, if you're not offended by everything, you're a sexist, racist monster.
If I have to protest the authenticity of a tuna roll - Yo.
- Yo.
- What's up? - LAURA: Talking schools.
Victim culture.
- You know.
- SPENCER: Ah.
I won't be around long enough to do that.
You know.
Cancer.
That's gonna get old really quick.
It's too bad though.
Black kid with a disease? Man, I'd get in everywhere.
Scholarship too.
SPENCER: Probably.
So I had fun this weekend.
I bet you did.
But, you know, the second time is always better than the first, so I've heard.
Sorry, the Make-A-Wish Foundation's closed for business.
[sighs.]
Fine.
I guess I'll try and get Laker tickets.
What? I like chairs.
[both moaning.]
Wait, what? You and Jordan? Yes, we've been emotionally involved for months.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God! Alex.
Cora.
I heard what happened.
[sighs.]
I'm sorry, man.
Oh.
Okay then.
I mean, what Fallon did, so fucked.
I always knew there was something wrong with that girl.
Thank you.
Oh, don't worry.
She's on leave.
We have a temp behind Jordan's desk until this all gets sorted out.
Hey, you good? I'm good.
Okay, good.
We should talk.
[knock on door.]
Yep.
Come in.
Hey there.
- Hey.
- VALERIE: How's it going? I'm good.
How are you? Good.
JENNIFER: Good.
We missed you the other night.
Oh, yeah.
I'm sorry.
Something just something came up.
That's okay.
Do you want to do something later? Maybe have a early dinner? Oh, I would, but Harry got us all tickets to the theater, so I think we're gonna do that.
No, totally.
Yeah.
I get it.
Um Lunch? Yeah.
Yeah, I have a session till 1:00, but after that? Okay.
Cool.
JENNIFER: Yep.
Hey, Jack mentioned that he had a really good time with you.
- He did? - Mm-hmm.
I mean, yeah, we did.
It was fun.
I had fun.
Good.
Great.
That's great.
- So lunch? - Yeah.
- 1:00.
- See you later.
- Okay.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- Bye.
This isn't easy for me.
The last couple of weeks, the tension, the infighting.
And then with something like this Kind of makes you realize that it's really easy to misinterpret things.
That happens.
I want to apologize to you for Fallon.
- [sighs.]
- Okay? You should not have been pulled into that.
Seriously, man, it's water under the bridge.
Hey, I have handled it, and it's gonna be fine, and we're gonna be fine and this is gonna be fine, and me and Sarah, we're gonna be fine too.
Oh, yeah? Yeah, well, she spent Friday night at a friend's house, but when she came back, we started talking.
We didn't stop.
I mean, all weekend.
We put it all out there.
Put it all out in the open, and yeah, we're gonna work it out.
I'm so happy to hear that.
[sighs.]
Me too.
Thank you.
You're quiet today.
Am I? [sighs.]
Would you say that I'm a trusting person? I would.
I'd say you're a very trusting person, sometimes to a fault.
I guess I try to see the good in people.
It's a wonderful quality.
I wish I saw it in more of my patients.
But it's naive, isn't it? Because not everyone's good.
Some people just take.
They take until there's nothing left.
Anthony, did something happen with Lauren? We've been talking.
What about? I told her about what we discussed.
The surgeries and accidents, and the possibility that she's been pressuring me into becoming someone else.
How did she react? She threw a plate.
At you? Well, at the at the wall behind me.
Uh-huh.
I I think I need to step back from this.
I I don't think this is the best thing for me right now.
Anthony, I think that is a great idea.
If she's making you uncomfortable, then a little time apart may give you the clarity you need.
I meant this.
You and me.
I'm going to discontinue our sessions.
- Anthony - We're happy together.
Lauren and I.
And the more I talk about it, the more uncertain I get.
I don't want to be uncertain.
[solemn music.]
Thank you for everything.
[sighs.]
LEIA: Jennifer called.
She can't do lunch.
You okay? I went back and he was gone.
Just checked out of the hotel.
Not a word.
You didn't text confirm? Well, he said to come over after my date.
Still, you got to confirm.
People who just show up places are generally unstable.
Doesn't matter now.
Why? What did he say? Nothing.
Haven't talked since.
Oh, boy.
God, I just shouldn't have gone over there.
I mean, it's one day, you know? One one conversation on a roof.
Probably a normal Thursday for him.
Oh, don't punish yourself for having fun.
You think that's what he's doing? Why don't you just tell him how you feel? Because if I'm emotional, then he'll know that I care, and if I care, then he'll have all the power.
Kind of sounds like he already does.
[instrumental music.]
I'm gonna text him.
That's a great shirt, by the way.
Oh.
Yeah, it really brings out your eyes.
[phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
- - [phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
[phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
- - [phone chirps.]
- - [phone dings.]
- LAURA: Liar.
SPENCER: Creep.
Nice headphones.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Are you free tomorrow? We're gonna hang out and take a hot tub.
You and Spencer? Yeah.
Cool.
I'm in.
Cool.
Why would you marry him? Will you just will you just sit down? He was having an affair.
An emotional affair.
That's worse.
Alex, my whole life is with Jordan.
I'm not looking to restart.
ALEX: What is wrong with restarting? My computer freezes, what do I do? I restart.
- Well, I'm not a computer.
- Right.
If you were, you'd be behaving rationally.
You'd say, "Huh, I was on this path, "and then my fiancé cheated on me and I cheated on him, and now maybe it's time to reevaluate.
" And do what? Date you? ALEX: I don't know.
Maybe.
You are not the guy to date.
- Why not? - SARAH: Oh, my God.
Do you even remember how we were together? - We were passionate.
- We fought about everything.
- Because we cared.
- SARAH: No.
We were young and arrogant and thought we knew better than everyone else.
- We did know better.
- Then you should've stuck by me, but no, you took my hand, you led me to the edge of a cliff, and when I jumped, you let go.
That was ten years ago.
- And I am past it.
- ALEX: No you're not.
If you were, you wouldn't be here.
Fuck you.
ALEX: You would've deleted my message and gone on with your life, but now you know that if you marry Jordan, you will spend every day thinking about me.
- Fuck you! - Fuck you! You want to ruin my life again? ALEX: Ruin it for yourself.
[tense music.]
[dramatic instrumental music.]
Hey, what was that movie you were talking about? It's, like, a black-and-white vampire thing? "A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night.
" You want to watch it soon? Sure.
Whenever.
[instrumental music.]
I forgot something inside.
Good day at school? Fine.
Anything you want to talk about? Nope.
Why is everyone obsessed with self-destruction? I mean, all I wanted was a friend.
Is that so unreasonable? She clearly has different expectations.
Well, then she should've said something.
But no, instead, we sleep together and it automatically means something.
To a lot of people it does mean something.
Why? - Laura.
- LAURA: No, really.
Why can't I have sex with someone I like and just leave it at that? Well, I guess you can, but you can't resent them for having a different experience.
But I want to.
Just talk to her.
Tell her how you feel.
You know, I think you owe her that much.
I know how that conversation ends.
It's not gonna go away.
I know you wish it would, but it's not, and the more you're dishonest with her, the worse it's gonna get.
I know.
God, I thought it would be easier with a girl.
Why would you ever think that? Hi, Valerie.
Hi, Sarah.
Oh, shoot.
Why was she here, Alex? Why was she in your house? We needed to have a talk.
You destroyed the living room.
Eh.
That was incidental.
Oh, God.
What did you tell her? Nothing.
Will you relax? So you didn't tell her that you messed up ten years ago and you regret breaking up and maybe should be together now? You're overreacting.
Jesus Christ.
She's she's she's a shiny object and you're a magpie.
You know what happens to magpies? They build fun little magpie nests full of trinkets for their magpie families? They get shot! The farmer shoots the magpie when it flies too close to the barn.
Now you've lost me.
How could you be so stupid? How could you be so fucking stupid? Okay, don't talk to me like I'm a child.
Then stop acting like a child.
It's fine.
I'm fine.
You take care of your relationships, I'll take care of mine.
Okay.
Okay.
You got it.
LAURA: Hey.
What's up? Um my mom's making me do family shit tonight, so rain check on the hot tub? No problem.
Cool.
Everything all right? Yeah.
Did you do this problem set yet? Let me see it.
[phone dings.]
[light instrumental music.]
[phone beeps.]
- Hello.
- Hey.
Hey.
Hi.
Jordan.
Hey, man.
What's up? Nothing much.
How you doing? I'm fine.
Fine? Well, fine is good.
[laughs.]
Hey, did I ever tell you how I got into this line of work? No, I don't think so.
Sit.
When I graduated college, I had no idea what I was gonna do.
I had no experience, no references.
I don't even think any of the professors knew my name, but I got lucky.
I got this friend whose mom gets in an accident so he has to go home to take care of her, and I fall into his job working for this fund manager down in Dallas, and suddenly my eyes are opened.
I see businesses go from proposal papers to regional branches.
I make a bet on a guy for $75,000.
Three years later, he's worth $80 million.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
But you know what the craziest part is? That side of the business doesn't even interest me that much.
I mean, seeding start-ups, it's boring.
No, my real passion is distressed assets.
Did you know that? No, I didn't.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, when a company's struggling, I mean really struggling, that's when I'm at my best.
I buy equity for pennies on the dollar and then I get to work.
I'm downsizing, streamlining, launching new products, penetrating markets.
Anything I can to turn red to black.
And finally, when all is well, I sell it out piece by piece, squeezing every last dollar I can before utterly dismantling it.
At the end of the day, all that's left is a few empty offices.
Well, and the memories, but those, my friend, fade much faster than you think.
Sarah told you, huh? I'm gonna burn your company to the ground.
[mellow pop music.]
Just so you know, this hot tub never gets cleaned, so we'll probably both get some flesh-eating, antibiotic-resistant staph infection.
But the temperature's good, right? It's a little hot.
Suck it up.
I'll have a hard time explaining the third-degree burns.
To who? Hospital people.
Got to be there in the morning.
Why? It's what I do.
That's shitty.
Yeah, I know.
- I'll come visit you.
- Please don't.
Oh, so you can come to my place but I can't go to yours? It's not mine.
But this is nice, right? Told you.
It's a little hot.
Better? [doorbell rings.]
[jazzy music.]
Is this seat taken? I'm Patrick.
What's your name? - Alex.
- What's that? - Alex.
- Alex, cool.
Cool.
You from around here? I am, yeah.
Look, I'm not really I'm from Oregon.
I caught the acting bug and, well, you know the story.
Are you an actor? I feel like I've seen you before.
Maybe on the audition circuit? No.
Well, you should be.
You got a face for it.
Commercials.
Maybe even TV.
Should give it a try.
Thanks.
Maybe I will.
Look, I know that we just met, but I got to tell someone this, and, well, here we are.
Had an audition today for a little movie.
Indie.
And I'm thinking to myself, "There's no way that I'm gonna get this," right? You know? They're seeing huge names for this thing.
Giovanni Ribisi.
Remember him? Skinny dude from "Boiler Room.
" Anyways, I get in the room and I sit down and I don't know what comes over me.
I don't even know how to explain it.
Just suddenly I wasn't Patrick from Oregon.
I was Jolene, a transgender construction worker who had just had his sorry, her her heart completely stomped on.
[scoffs.]
I finished the read and I swear to God I swear to God, I see tears in the casting director's eyes.
It was incredible.
Whoo.
Yeah, city of dreams, right? You never know.
Sometimes they could come true.
So what do you Shut the fuck up! [knocking on door.]
Are you married? You got some secret family in another state that you go visit? - No.
- VALERIE: Text me.
Call me.
I don't care.
But don't disappear.
Makes me fucking crazy.
Okay.
Do you want to come in? Mm-hmm.
[sighs.]
Alex.
[Penny & The Quarters' "You and Me" playing.]
[light instrumental music.]
MAN: You and me You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: Hey, hey, hey MAN: You and me - WOMAN: My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: If the stars don't shine If the moon won't rise If I never see the setting sun again You won't hear me cry This I testify Please me believe me, boy You know I wouldn't lie As long as there is MAN: You and me - WOMAN: Ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me - WOMAN: Hey, hey, hey - MAN: You and me - WOMAN: My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: If you love a soul more than fame and gold And that soul feels the same about you It's a natural fact There's no turning back And here's some advice to you You got to say it's MAN: You and me - WOMAN: Ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh - MAN: You and me
For a session? More like a date under the guise of a session.
He always loves a grand gesture.
- It was charming.
- JENNIFER: [sighs.]
I just don't want to see you get hurt.
LAURA: I think we should have sex with Spencer.
Oh, are you serious? I mean, the kid's dying.
It's the least we could do.
One night we do whatever we want with him and that's it.
JENNIFER: Oh, Jack also asked for your number.
VALERIE: Game night Jack? JENNIFER: I didn't give it to him.
He's not housebroken.
Tighten up, will you? Your performance is all over the place.
Wait, what? FALLON: Your little act for Sarah.
It's fine.
I'm doing the same thing with Jordan.
ALEX: You and Jordan? [dramatic music.]
[knocking on door.]
Sorry, I have the wrong room.
[Chuck Jackson's "Any Day Now" playing.]
[mellow instrumental music.]
CHUCK JACKSON: Any day now I will hear you say Goodbye, my love And you'll be on your way Then my wild, beautiful bird You will have flown Oh Any day now I'll be all alone What? Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
You heard that, huh? Were you performing an exorcism? I love when they communicate, but volume is basically uncontrollable.
Totally.
It's not like you could just ask her to be respectful of the other people sleeping here.
I tried to put my hand over her mouth, but then she started panting and I couldn't tell if she liked it or was having trouble breathing, so I stopped.
- What a gentleman.
- Yeah.
That much noise is incredibly validating.
I'm fucking my self-esteem to new heights.
Who was she anyway? Someone in need.
A charity fuck? Just a girl who wanted to be loved.
Feels good to help people, doesn't it? Yeah, it does.
You have fun with your friends? Mm, yeah.
Well, good morning, Val.
Mm.
Who won out? Jack or the good doctor? [light instrumental music.]
- Hey.
- Hmm? The power of Christ compels you.
The power of Christ [elevator dings.]
[sighs.]
Thank fucking God.
I've been waiting for eight minutes.
I was about to text my mother.
Do you know what she said yesterday? I do not know, Elle, but why don't you come on inside and tell me all about it? ELLE: It was so bad.
I think she's dying or she thinks she's dying.
Why were you late? Fuck.
LAURA: What about the UCs? AUBREY: I like Berkeley.
LAURA: It's hard to get in.
UCLA? It's too close to home.
Liberal arts school? Hmm.
Those are tough.
They're country clubs.
Yeah, if you're not offended by everything, you're a sexist, racist monster.
If I have to protest the authenticity of a tuna roll - Yo.
- Yo.
- What's up? - LAURA: Talking schools.
Victim culture.
- You know.
- SPENCER: Ah.
I won't be around long enough to do that.
You know.
Cancer.
That's gonna get old really quick.
It's too bad though.
Black kid with a disease? Man, I'd get in everywhere.
Scholarship too.
SPENCER: Probably.
So I had fun this weekend.
I bet you did.
But, you know, the second time is always better than the first, so I've heard.
Sorry, the Make-A-Wish Foundation's closed for business.
[sighs.]
Fine.
I guess I'll try and get Laker tickets.
What? I like chairs.
[both moaning.]
Wait, what? You and Jordan? Yes, we've been emotionally involved for months.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God! Alex.
Cora.
I heard what happened.
[sighs.]
I'm sorry, man.
Oh.
Okay then.
I mean, what Fallon did, so fucked.
I always knew there was something wrong with that girl.
Thank you.
Oh, don't worry.
She's on leave.
We have a temp behind Jordan's desk until this all gets sorted out.
Hey, you good? I'm good.
Okay, good.
We should talk.
[knock on door.]
Yep.
Come in.
Hey there.
- Hey.
- VALERIE: How's it going? I'm good.
How are you? Good.
JENNIFER: Good.
We missed you the other night.
Oh, yeah.
I'm sorry.
Something just something came up.
That's okay.
Do you want to do something later? Maybe have a early dinner? Oh, I would, but Harry got us all tickets to the theater, so I think we're gonna do that.
No, totally.
Yeah.
I get it.
Um Lunch? Yeah.
Yeah, I have a session till 1:00, but after that? Okay.
Cool.
JENNIFER: Yep.
Hey, Jack mentioned that he had a really good time with you.
- He did? - Mm-hmm.
I mean, yeah, we did.
It was fun.
I had fun.
Good.
Great.
That's great.
- So lunch? - Yeah.
- 1:00.
- See you later.
- Okay.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- Bye.
This isn't easy for me.
The last couple of weeks, the tension, the infighting.
And then with something like this Kind of makes you realize that it's really easy to misinterpret things.
That happens.
I want to apologize to you for Fallon.
- [sighs.]
- Okay? You should not have been pulled into that.
Seriously, man, it's water under the bridge.
Hey, I have handled it, and it's gonna be fine, and we're gonna be fine and this is gonna be fine, and me and Sarah, we're gonna be fine too.
Oh, yeah? Yeah, well, she spent Friday night at a friend's house, but when she came back, we started talking.
We didn't stop.
I mean, all weekend.
We put it all out there.
Put it all out in the open, and yeah, we're gonna work it out.
I'm so happy to hear that.
[sighs.]
Me too.
Thank you.
You're quiet today.
Am I? [sighs.]
Would you say that I'm a trusting person? I would.
I'd say you're a very trusting person, sometimes to a fault.
I guess I try to see the good in people.
It's a wonderful quality.
I wish I saw it in more of my patients.
But it's naive, isn't it? Because not everyone's good.
Some people just take.
They take until there's nothing left.
Anthony, did something happen with Lauren? We've been talking.
What about? I told her about what we discussed.
The surgeries and accidents, and the possibility that she's been pressuring me into becoming someone else.
How did she react? She threw a plate.
At you? Well, at the at the wall behind me.
Uh-huh.
I I think I need to step back from this.
I I don't think this is the best thing for me right now.
Anthony, I think that is a great idea.
If she's making you uncomfortable, then a little time apart may give you the clarity you need.
I meant this.
You and me.
I'm going to discontinue our sessions.
- Anthony - We're happy together.
Lauren and I.
And the more I talk about it, the more uncertain I get.
I don't want to be uncertain.
[solemn music.]
Thank you for everything.
[sighs.]
LEIA: Jennifer called.
She can't do lunch.
You okay? I went back and he was gone.
Just checked out of the hotel.
Not a word.
You didn't text confirm? Well, he said to come over after my date.
Still, you got to confirm.
People who just show up places are generally unstable.
Doesn't matter now.
Why? What did he say? Nothing.
Haven't talked since.
Oh, boy.
God, I just shouldn't have gone over there.
I mean, it's one day, you know? One one conversation on a roof.
Probably a normal Thursday for him.
Oh, don't punish yourself for having fun.
You think that's what he's doing? Why don't you just tell him how you feel? Because if I'm emotional, then he'll know that I care, and if I care, then he'll have all the power.
Kind of sounds like he already does.
[instrumental music.]
I'm gonna text him.
That's a great shirt, by the way.
Oh.
Yeah, it really brings out your eyes.
[phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
- - [phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
[phone dings.]
- [phone chirps.]
- - [phone chirps.]
- - [phone dings.]
- LAURA: Liar.
SPENCER: Creep.
Nice headphones.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Are you free tomorrow? We're gonna hang out and take a hot tub.
You and Spencer? Yeah.
Cool.
I'm in.
Cool.
Why would you marry him? Will you just will you just sit down? He was having an affair.
An emotional affair.
That's worse.
Alex, my whole life is with Jordan.
I'm not looking to restart.
ALEX: What is wrong with restarting? My computer freezes, what do I do? I restart.
- Well, I'm not a computer.
- Right.
If you were, you'd be behaving rationally.
You'd say, "Huh, I was on this path, "and then my fiancé cheated on me and I cheated on him, and now maybe it's time to reevaluate.
" And do what? Date you? ALEX: I don't know.
Maybe.
You are not the guy to date.
- Why not? - SARAH: Oh, my God.
Do you even remember how we were together? - We were passionate.
- We fought about everything.
- Because we cared.
- SARAH: No.
We were young and arrogant and thought we knew better than everyone else.
- We did know better.
- Then you should've stuck by me, but no, you took my hand, you led me to the edge of a cliff, and when I jumped, you let go.
That was ten years ago.
- And I am past it.
- ALEX: No you're not.
If you were, you wouldn't be here.
Fuck you.
ALEX: You would've deleted my message and gone on with your life, but now you know that if you marry Jordan, you will spend every day thinking about me.
- Fuck you! - Fuck you! You want to ruin my life again? ALEX: Ruin it for yourself.
[tense music.]
[dramatic instrumental music.]
Hey, what was that movie you were talking about? It's, like, a black-and-white vampire thing? "A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night.
" You want to watch it soon? Sure.
Whenever.
[instrumental music.]
I forgot something inside.
Good day at school? Fine.
Anything you want to talk about? Nope.
Why is everyone obsessed with self-destruction? I mean, all I wanted was a friend.
Is that so unreasonable? She clearly has different expectations.
Well, then she should've said something.
But no, instead, we sleep together and it automatically means something.
To a lot of people it does mean something.
Why? - Laura.
- LAURA: No, really.
Why can't I have sex with someone I like and just leave it at that? Well, I guess you can, but you can't resent them for having a different experience.
But I want to.
Just talk to her.
Tell her how you feel.
You know, I think you owe her that much.
I know how that conversation ends.
It's not gonna go away.
I know you wish it would, but it's not, and the more you're dishonest with her, the worse it's gonna get.
I know.
God, I thought it would be easier with a girl.
Why would you ever think that? Hi, Valerie.
Hi, Sarah.
Oh, shoot.
Why was she here, Alex? Why was she in your house? We needed to have a talk.
You destroyed the living room.
Eh.
That was incidental.
Oh, God.
What did you tell her? Nothing.
Will you relax? So you didn't tell her that you messed up ten years ago and you regret breaking up and maybe should be together now? You're overreacting.
Jesus Christ.
She's she's she's a shiny object and you're a magpie.
You know what happens to magpies? They build fun little magpie nests full of trinkets for their magpie families? They get shot! The farmer shoots the magpie when it flies too close to the barn.
Now you've lost me.
How could you be so stupid? How could you be so fucking stupid? Okay, don't talk to me like I'm a child.
Then stop acting like a child.
It's fine.
I'm fine.
You take care of your relationships, I'll take care of mine.
Okay.
Okay.
You got it.
LAURA: Hey.
What's up? Um my mom's making me do family shit tonight, so rain check on the hot tub? No problem.
Cool.
Everything all right? Yeah.
Did you do this problem set yet? Let me see it.
[phone dings.]
[light instrumental music.]
[phone beeps.]
- Hello.
- Hey.
Hey.
Hi.
Jordan.
Hey, man.
What's up? Nothing much.
How you doing? I'm fine.
Fine? Well, fine is good.
[laughs.]
Hey, did I ever tell you how I got into this line of work? No, I don't think so.
Sit.
When I graduated college, I had no idea what I was gonna do.
I had no experience, no references.
I don't even think any of the professors knew my name, but I got lucky.
I got this friend whose mom gets in an accident so he has to go home to take care of her, and I fall into his job working for this fund manager down in Dallas, and suddenly my eyes are opened.
I see businesses go from proposal papers to regional branches.
I make a bet on a guy for $75,000.
Three years later, he's worth $80 million.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
But you know what the craziest part is? That side of the business doesn't even interest me that much.
I mean, seeding start-ups, it's boring.
No, my real passion is distressed assets.
Did you know that? No, I didn't.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, when a company's struggling, I mean really struggling, that's when I'm at my best.
I buy equity for pennies on the dollar and then I get to work.
I'm downsizing, streamlining, launching new products, penetrating markets.
Anything I can to turn red to black.
And finally, when all is well, I sell it out piece by piece, squeezing every last dollar I can before utterly dismantling it.
At the end of the day, all that's left is a few empty offices.
Well, and the memories, but those, my friend, fade much faster than you think.
Sarah told you, huh? I'm gonna burn your company to the ground.
[mellow pop music.]
Just so you know, this hot tub never gets cleaned, so we'll probably both get some flesh-eating, antibiotic-resistant staph infection.
But the temperature's good, right? It's a little hot.
Suck it up.
I'll have a hard time explaining the third-degree burns.
To who? Hospital people.
Got to be there in the morning.
Why? It's what I do.
That's shitty.
Yeah, I know.
- I'll come visit you.
- Please don't.
Oh, so you can come to my place but I can't go to yours? It's not mine.
But this is nice, right? Told you.
It's a little hot.
Better? [doorbell rings.]
[jazzy music.]
Is this seat taken? I'm Patrick.
What's your name? - Alex.
- What's that? - Alex.
- Alex, cool.
Cool.
You from around here? I am, yeah.
Look, I'm not really I'm from Oregon.
I caught the acting bug and, well, you know the story.
Are you an actor? I feel like I've seen you before.
Maybe on the audition circuit? No.
Well, you should be.
You got a face for it.
Commercials.
Maybe even TV.
Should give it a try.
Thanks.
Maybe I will.
Look, I know that we just met, but I got to tell someone this, and, well, here we are.
Had an audition today for a little movie.
Indie.
And I'm thinking to myself, "There's no way that I'm gonna get this," right? You know? They're seeing huge names for this thing.
Giovanni Ribisi.
Remember him? Skinny dude from "Boiler Room.
" Anyways, I get in the room and I sit down and I don't know what comes over me.
I don't even know how to explain it.
Just suddenly I wasn't Patrick from Oregon.
I was Jolene, a transgender construction worker who had just had his sorry, her her heart completely stomped on.
[scoffs.]
I finished the read and I swear to God I swear to God, I see tears in the casting director's eyes.
It was incredible.
Whoo.
Yeah, city of dreams, right? You never know.
Sometimes they could come true.
So what do you Shut the fuck up! [knocking on door.]
Are you married? You got some secret family in another state that you go visit? - No.
- VALERIE: Text me.
Call me.
I don't care.
But don't disappear.
Makes me fucking crazy.
Okay.
Do you want to come in? Mm-hmm.
[sighs.]
Alex.
[Penny & The Quarters' "You and Me" playing.]
[light instrumental music.]
MAN: You and me You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: Hey, hey, hey MAN: You and me - WOMAN: My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: If the stars don't shine If the moon won't rise If I never see the setting sun again You won't hear me cry This I testify Please me believe me, boy You know I wouldn't lie As long as there is MAN: You and me - WOMAN: Ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me - WOMAN: Hey, hey, hey - MAN: You and me - WOMAN: My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my - MAN: You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me WOMAN: If you love a soul more than fame and gold And that soul feels the same about you It's a natural fact There's no turning back And here's some advice to you You got to say it's MAN: You and me - WOMAN: Ooh, oh, oh, oh, oh - MAN: You and me