Dawn of the Croods (2015) s02e08 Episode Script

1 Bom-bom, bom-ba-dum Ma-ma-ma-bom-ba-dum Ba-da-dum [music playing.]
[Grug.]
Sandy, come to Daddy.
[growling.]
Come on.
Listen to the sweet sing-song sound of my voice, never aware that I'm about to yank you down.
[hissing.]
That's what I get for teaching you words.
Well played! [yelps.]
- [grunts.]
- [giggling.]
[blowing raspberry.]
- [groaning.]
- [laughing.]
You fell right into my little trap.
All right, Ugga, Sandy is secured, chores are done.
I'm gonna go watch the winged cheetah races.
Ugh.
I will never get the appeal of watching animals run around in circles.
But Mom, sometimes they crash.
[giggling.]
- Hope they crash for you, Dad.
- [pelt tearing.]
That's the sound of another chore, and my heart ripping in two.
- [groaning.]
- Afraid so.
Would you mind killing Eep a new pelt? Sure, sure.
Yeah, I'll just swing by the hunting fields, then off to If you're going to the fields, can you help me throw out some old fruit? I kinda let it pile up.
- Uh - And after that, my feets need a rubbin'.
Ugh, that is not happening.
Okay, look, if I speed through those chores, - there's still a chance I can - Oh, I forgot.
We still need water for Sandy's "ba-a-th.
" [grunting, hissing.]
Ugh! Now she's learning sounds, too? But come on, you guys.
The winged cheetah races are Fine.
Before I go, does anyone else need anything from me? Maybe my blood, huh? Anything? - Huh? - Hug? [groans.]
Chores, chores, chores! I never get to do what I want.
Oh, Water Me, I wish you were real.
Then you could do my work while I took a day off.
[sighing.]
Now time to drink your water face.
Good seein' you.
[slurping.]
Hm? Hmm? - Huh? - Huh? - Do I know you? - Do I know you? You look familiar.
You look familiar.
Gurg Doorc.
Used teeth trader.
It's lonely work, no family, just walking valley to valley, trying to get into people's mouths.
Eh, hm, actually, I just got a wart frog fang that'd look amazing in that food hole of yours.
- Uh, I'm good.
- Hey, Grug.
Amber, I'm Grug.
Well, both you Grugs better hurry.
The race about to start, and Never Been Bitten running in it.
Never Been Bitten! The fastest winged cheetah alive.
[groaning.]
- Darn family and their chores! - You have a family? Are they real or a tooth one like mine? This is my sister, my brother, my uncle, and my cousin Linus.
Uh, yeah, nice to meet you, but no, my family are people.
If only there were another me to do all this work.
Wish I could help you, pal.
I'd love to do chores for a family.
[chuckling.]
[laughing.]
Okay, just act natural, keep looking exactly like me and go! Oh! Hello, family.
I brought that water we need for that reason I remember.
Great.
Now it's rubbing time.
Uh, sure.
Will do, Gran Crood, mother to Ugga and lovable thorn in my side.
Huh? Did you just call me lovable? Oh! Oh! I'll allow it! [everyone gasping.]
- Grug, what are you doing? - [gasping.]
Oh, he's blowing it.
I thought "don't rub Gran's feet" was a no-brainer.
[chuckling.]
That's right.
In fact, I've only got one thing to say about Gran and that is [belching.]
[laughing.]
- Good one! - Now that's the man I married.
[laughing.]
Wow, this guy's good.
Well, off to the races.
[giggling.]
So, family, you gonna let me do some chores or do I have to beg? [laughing.]
[laughing.]
- [bellowing.]
- [grunting.]
[straining.]
[groaning.]
[bellowing, shivering.]
[giggling.]
To goofing off while another you does all your boring chores.
To goofing off while, the, the What was rest? Doesn't matter, the cheetahs are running! [cheering.]
Hey, son, think fast.
Dad, you know I think slow.
[both.]
Trash fight! [giggling.]
- You got me! - Hey! Hey! [cheering.]
[Grug.]
Yeah, you better run! [cheering.]
That what Amber come to see! Go, go, go, go! Yeah, you can do it, Never Been Bitten! He won! Never Been Bitten remains unbitten.
Grug, the cave could really use a fresh coat of dirt.
[hacking.]
Ooh, who are you? Wait, ahem.
There's more.
[coughing.]
I got you a dozen.
Oh, this could take a bit.
[coughs.]
Think a Yep, oh, a thorn got stuck.
[coughing.]
Hey, perfect timing.
We really are in sync, aren't we, buddy? Well, I'll be returning to my family now, so thanks for the help.
[hacking.]
Oh, yeah, stomach flowers.
Great idea.
Ugga's gonna love these.
Wait.
What about me? Oh, right.
Uh, here, uh, I got these for you.
Uh, this guy lost the race.
Oh, and hey, feel free to come back tomorrow.
I'm sure there'll be plenty more awful chores for you.
[sighing.]
I love my new outfit, Dad.
Pat is just gonna die when she sees it.
Uh-huh.
That is new, and you're welcome.
I hope your friend does die.
And it was fun playing with you in the trash today, Dad.
[sniffing.]
Uh, ooh, sure thing, son.
Uh, that's just part of being a good dad, letting your son roll around in garbage.
- We love you, Dad.
- We love you, Dad.
No, I love you.
No, I love you.
[snoring.]
[grunting.]
[Grug.]
Huh? Other Grug? - What are you doing? - I've been thinking.
Teeth trading is a young man's game.
I'm ready to settle down with a family.
Your family.
What? No.
That is crazy.
And since, you know, we're completely and totally the same, you know that's crazy.
Crazy? You hear this guy, Linus? [grunting, screaming.]
So long! Sorry I had to get rid of you, but I just needed this more.
You get it? He gets it.
What? Never Been Bitten? Wow, it is an honor to fly with you.
[screaming.]
Or it would be under different circumstances.
Ow, ow, ow, ow! Hmm [grunting.]
[screaming.]
Ow.
[Gurg.]
Rise and shine, beautiful family.
There's no time for sleep when you have a family.
Every moment's a treasure.
Ooh, I know a good way to wake up.
Family drum circle.
Uh, Grug, did last night's dinner give you a brain parasite? A brain parasite that loves this family, maybe.
No, really.
You're acting even more annoying than normal.
What's wrong with you? - He's a fake! - [all gasping.]
So, that's why he kept calling me "Oop" yesterday! - Whoever you are, get out now! - [cocking, hissing.]
Wait.
This is all just a misunderstanding.
- You see, what happened was - [yelling.]
[gasping.]
Whoa.
Which one is Dad? [both.]
Me! - Not you! - Not him! - Me! - Me! They look exactly the same.
And their voices are indistinguishable.
[both.]
What? That is not what I sound like.
I'm Grug.
You know, I'll prove it.
Who else can burp as pure as this? [belches.]
Nice try.
But the real Grug, me, burps like this.
- [belches.]
- [gasping.]
[all.]
Ooh! Whichever one you are, teach me your ways.
[groaning.]
[grunting.]
This is getting us nowhere.
If I can't have the real Grug, I'm gonna throw both Grugs out.
No! That handsome fake is only here because of me.
I wanted him to do all those family chores so I could goof off with my friends.
But it was a mistake, and I'm not walking away from you guys ever again.
What he said.
Only more heartfelt, since the Croods are my family.
What about your other family? Go ahead.
I hear they're very loving.
Yeah, but are they tasty? No, not Linus! Oh, Grug, it's good to have you back.
[growling.]
And you tried to make us join a drum circle.
- Beat it, bub.
- [hissing.]
Hm.
Hey Hey, I'm sorry, family.
From now on, I won't miss another moment.
Promise.
How can I make it up to you? Well, one thing comes to mind.
[shuddering.]
This is for your family.
This is for your family.
This is for your family.
This is for your Oh, God, why are they mushy? [music playing.]
Mm.
Well, class, your homework is [belching.]
adequate.
But why, may I ask, did no one do the extra credit? Teacher Squawk, our parents won't let us hunt the big chickuna.
- It's twenty boulders tall.
- [chickuna roaring.]
[screaming.]
[gasping.]
[stomach growling.]
One day, my love.
One day.
Oh, your parents complain about everything! Just this morning, they were whining that my assignments [mocking.]
are taking up too much of your time.
[laughing.]
That is so my dad.
So, to get them off my back, we need new ideas to get you hunting faster, and that means it's time for another idea fair! Hmm.
Thought you'd cheer there.
Anyway, as always, the team that presents the smartest idea at the fair takes home these awards.
Whoa! Don't get your hopes up.
You know Bulk and Sulk always win, 'cause their dad does their projects for them.
Such a rip-off.
Now, since Bulk and Sulk have won every fair we've had so far, I've decided to make a change by giving them their awards in advance.
[chuckling.]
Come on up, boys.
[laughing.]
[groaning.]
They did it! Hooray for my boys! - [Eep groaning.]
- [yelping.]
Come on! At least give us a chance! Fine.
We'll give it to them after they've earned it.
You big babies.
Wait, let me get a picture first.
Say "we're the winners.
" And keep saying it, 'cause this will take a while.
[both.]
We're the winners.
We're the winners! [groaning.]
All I want in life is to wipe those dumb smiles off their faces.
You know, to get that award and their smiles, what we need to do is - Win the idea fair! - Kidnap them! Oh, winning the idea fair's the better idea.
Let's do that.
Now all we need is one great idea.
Well, I've got nothin'.
[sighs.]
We can't give up.
There's gotta be an idea around here somewhere.
[gasping.]
[panting, sighing.]
There are no ideas around here.
But maybe over there! [grunting.]
This could be the invention that changes hunting forever.
Just have to get it in position, take a running start, and throw.
Yes! Direct hit.
Huh, that really felt like it should've worked.
[screaming.]
I call it a "lure.
" While we wait here, an animal will be lured to him.
Sitting there alone, scared, as if everyone in the world has forgotten about him.
[sniffling.]
I'm coming for you, buddy.
You may not be real, but your feelings are.
- [groaning.]
- [roaring.]
[screaming.]
Thanks to hide-o-flage, animals won't see the hunter.
They'll see a plain old spike apple bush.
[giggles.]
Ta-da! - But predators eat spike apples.
- Huh? - [roaring.]
- [screaming.]
Okay, we've had setbacks, but with these fishing vines, - pretty soon - We'll be Thunk-deep in dinner.
- Whoo-hoo! - Yeah! [sighing.]
[groaning.]
[exhaling.]
Fishing is horrible.
We've invented a form of torture.
Actually, Teacher Squawk might give us a prize for that.
- [splashing.]
- [gasping.]
A bite! Oh, oh, help me pull in this delicious, juicy man-eater! - [roaring.]
- [screaming.]
[gasping.]
[bellowing.]
[panting.]
There we go.
Do that again.
[grunting.]
- [rumbling.]
- [growling.]
[laughing.]
This is it! This is it! The idea that'll win us the fair.
What should we call it? How about the "whapssh?" [Snoot.]
Now this is a winner.
Hey, it talks, too.
Sh! That came from over there.
See, boys, this is the amazing idea you came up with for the fair.
It's crushed leaves and herbs that make a powerful new bait I call I mean, you call, "chickunip.
" [chickunas squawking.]
Whoa! Bulk, we're geniuses.
Wow, their thing makes you look terrible.
So after all that, they're just gonna win again.
No, it's an idea fair, and that isn't their idea.
We have to make sure it goes away.
[gasping.]
You mean cheat? Say "everyone else is a loser.
" [both.]
Everyone else is a loser.
Everyone else is a loser.
Everyone else is a loser.
I'm fine with that.
Welcome to the idea fair, class.
I can't wait to see all the ways you've discovered to get me food.
[stomach growling.]
Sorry, "us" food.
[chuckling.]
Darling, please don't correct me in front of my students.
No, I'm not saying my needs come first.
- I'm just - Hey, Bulk, hey, Sulk.
Just wanted to say good luck today.
Luck? We don't need luck.
Also, what's luck? We're not worried.
For us, victory [giggling.]
is in the bag.
Boom.
[chuckling.]
Yeah, yeah, guess you're right.
Uh, boy, I sure am dumb.
And distracting.
Uh, where's your brother? Who, Thunk? He's over there.
Whoa! Has he had a growth spurt? He looks amazing.
That kid's a riot.
[laughing.]
- I got it, Eep.
- Nice.
Nothing can stop us from winning now.
No excuses.
It's not an excuse, Teacher Squawk.
Our project was right there.
I have never been so disappointed.
When I think of how hungry I am, I [stomach growling.]
Oh, baby, you don't mean that.
You're upset.
Okay, okay, okay, dear.
Whatever you say.
I'm sorry, boys.
My stomach gives me no choice but to kick you out of school.
[gasping.]
[sobbing.]
No! We'll be eaten alive by our parents when they find out! Gee, I know I wanted to "whapssh" the smiles off their faces, but now I feel like someone's using a "whapssh" on my heart right now.
But, hey, we can fix it, right? We'll put the pouch back and whoops! [coughing.]
Wow.
That's gonna attract a lot of chickuna.
[rumbling.]
[gasping.]
[Thunk.]
Or one big one! [roaring.]
[gasping.]
It's - it's beautiful.
- [roaring.]
[yelping.]
- [shuddering.]
- [sniffing.]
[giggling.]
[gasping.]
- [screaming.]
- [roaring.]
Uh-oh.
We're gonna need a really good idea to save Bulk and Sulk.
Or we need a bunch of only okay ideas.
- Help! - Save us! - Help! - Save us! [screaming.]
It's our lucky day, brother.
I'm still putting this in the win column, brother.
[screaming.]
Hey, you, over here! [yelping.]
No, not there.
Down here! [screaming.]
[shrieking.]
- Yeah! [laughing.]
- Whoo-hoo! Whoo! I am ready to choose a winner.
Teacher Squawk, us winning wouldn't be fair.
We stole Bulk and Sulk's project.
Yeah.
They deserve to win.
Wait! The chickunip wasn't our idea! Our dad gave it to us! Yeah, and he stole it from some weird guy.
Where is that chickunip? If it gets out in the open, I'll be in big [people screaming.]
Oh.
More blood on my hands.
Two teams humbly offering first place to the other.
Why, every time I think I have you students figured out, you do something like this and show me just how dumb you truly are.
I'm giving first place to him.
My idea is a volcano, only tiny.
What? That doesn't have anything to do with catching food.
Oh, I know.
But look what it can do.
[bubbling.]
[squealing.]
[sighing.]
So unfair.
[giggling.]
[students.]
Ooh! Ha! Never mind.
I'm on board.
Whoo-oh-oh-oh Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum Whoo-oh, ba-dum-dum ba-dum Whoo-oh, ba-dum-dum Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum Whoo-oh-oh-oh Ba-dum-dum Ba-dum-dum ba-dum