Hercules: The Legendary Journeys s02e08 Episode Script

Yo, traveller! Try something new! - And what would that be? - Food, fast food, for the hungry and the hurried.
I am hungry, but I'm more interested in good food.
Oh, give it a try.
First bite is free.
It's awful.
The bread tastes like chalk and the meat whatever it is is overcooked.
- But it's fast! - And so is road kill.
Road kill? You mean, those little rodents that get - run over by passing wagons? - Yeah.
Interesting! - I thought you were hungry.
- I'm not that hungry.
Oh.
Wa-wa-wait.
You're gonna resell it? - A shame to waste good food! - Fast food.
- What d'ya call that thing? - That.
Same as my name.
- Full-awful.
- Good name, don't you think? It's perfect.
Spring is here, Sal.
The gods have blessed us with another beautiful day.
Were you talking to me? You were talking to your little friends, weren't you? May I? They're so cute.
And smart, too.
You can train them like a dog.
- Shouldn't they be in pens? - No.
I don't believe anything should be locked up.
Oh, that's a beautiful thought.
Persephone, what have I told you about talking to strangers? Oh, Mother, he's harmless.
He's just a swineherder.
- Herding pigs is an important job.
- Typical mortal.
- Who are you talking to? - Sounds just like your father.
Believe me, the less you deal with them, the better off you are.
- What are you doing here, anyway? - Well, you made such a wonderful spring day, I'd thought I'd take advantage of it.
- Look at all the lovely wildflowers.
- No prettier than you, my dear.
Oh, my.
Look at that poor oak tree.
I must tend to it.
Gods above! Ha! Ha! Ya! Ha! Ya! Whoa! Hades! No, Hades, no! Ha! Phil? Sal? Come on! I've gotcha! Yah! - Noo! - Yah! Yah! This is the story of a time long ago.
A time of myth and legend, when the ancient gods were petty and cruel, and they plagued mankind with suffering.
Only one man dared to challenge their power-Hercules.
Hercules possessed a strength the world had never seen, a strength surpassed only by the power of his heart.
He journeyed the earth, battling the minions of wicked stepmother, Hera, the all-powerful queen of the gods.
But wherever there was evil, wherever an innocent would suffer, there would be Hercules.
Demeter? - He took her, and now she's gone! - Who took who? Hades, he kidnapped my daughter and took her to the other side.
- He took Persephone? But why? - Because he hates me.
- Hercules, you have to help me.
- What can I do? I mean, if Hades is behind this, it's a problem for the gods.
You've been to the other side and come back.
This isn't my concern.
You and Hades are both gods.
It's reason enough for me to stay out of it.
There'll be consequences if you turn me down.
I'm willing to suffer them.
I'm sorry for you, but I can't help.
You're gonna be a lot sorrier before I'm through! The Earth shall be barren as my heart.
Demeter.
I wish I could offer you something but all of our food is gone.
This usually is fertile land.
I'm sorry.
Last year, we lost our goat herd to pestilence.
We were counting on this year's crop when-- - The storm.
- Now, the last of our livestock has died.
All the other farms are having the same problems frozen livestock, frozen crops.
We were already living on the edge when this storm hit.
Here.
It's not much, but it'll help tide you over.
I wouldn't accept it, but for the kids.
- Don't worry about it.
- When the goddess of the harvest turns against you there's not much anyone can do.
Yes, there is.
Thanks for the use of your fire.
Demeter, I've reconsidered.
I thought you might.
What you're doing to mankind is unconscionable.
What Hades did to me and my Persephone is unconscionable.
You've made your point.
Let's get on with this.
I've talked to the other gods.
You'll be allowed to go to the other side.
Find my daughter and bring her back.
As easy as that.
Hades is a formidable god.
- He rules the other side all of it.
- And he'll use everything in his power to keep Persephone there demons, ghosts, monsters, he's full of sorcery and tricks.
And if I go and return with Persephone you'll set nature back on course the weather, the harvest? You have my word.
Just remember, you can't eat the food of the other side.
And once you start back don't look behind you.
- Or what? - Or you'll be stuck there forever.
How do I get there? No! Thanks, Demeter.
Give me the ball! Give me the ball! Deianeira.
Stop! Hold it right there! Charon? Aw, it's you, Hercules.
Great, I feel really fortunate.
- You don't sound surpried to see me.
- Well, what's the surprise? - We all know you're coming.
- You do? In fact Hades is really looking forward to it.
Oh, boy, have you got your work cut out.
- That pig.
- Yeah, cute, huh? I'm gonna eat him later.
Actually, I I fell on a bit of luck the other day.
Or I should say, a bit of luck fell on me nearly broke my neck.
And then I'm standing there just minding my own business and Hades comes along in that stupid chariot of his you know, driving like a maniac nearly knocked me down.
Still you don't look a gift pig in the mouth, do ya? Actually, it's very difficult to get food around here.
So I hear.
This chariot, Persephone in it? Persephone? Oh, yeah, well, you know, Hades has got a big thing about Persephone.
- Then, he did kidnap her.
- Well, you know, there's two sides to every coin speakin' of which you still owe me from last time.
- Yeah, put in on my tab.
- Ta-- what is that? I can't believe you'd do something like that! To anyone! I did what I had to do.
You've probably aged my mother twenty years! She's very emotional, you know.
I can't change what's already been done.
You could have talked to her, or something.
Right, all I had to do was ask her, and she'd let you come and live on the other side be my wife, hah, when Tartarus freezes over.
Look, I'm sorry if I caused you or your mother any grief.
- I only did it because I love you.
- Oh, great, that justifies it.
You love someone, so you can do whatever you want.
Why don't you relax, have some food? You haven't eaten since you got here.
You know I can't eat the food of the other side.
- I'll be stuck here forever.
- Would that be so bad? - What about my mother? - She can come visit.
- We'll build on an extra room.
- She'd never go for it.
That would be her loss.
That was a pretty wild chariot ride.
We can do that any time you like.
Oh, Hades why does it have to be like this? I just don't get it.
How come, whenever I deal with you, I get the short end of the stick? Ah, it only seems that way, Charon.
It's because of your negative outlook.
Negative? How can you say that? I mean, look around.
You see any sunlight, any dancing girls? This ain't exactly a cheery place, you know.
I'll tell you what.
I'll make it up to you.
Keep that pig alive till I get back I'll give ya a special recipe for him.
- Hah.
- There's garlic.
- Garlic.
- Honey.
- Honey.
- I'll give the rest to ya, later.
All right.
But remember, you owe me two gold coins.
- Yeah, I'm good for it.
- Well, don't leave town! Ah, I don't know.
I should charge him interest.
I should charge him a lot of interest.
Your turn! Here! Wait for me! Hercules? Hercules! Deianeira.
- I am so glad you're back.
- Back.
You've been gone much too long this time.
I swear, if you were gone any longer, you'd be a stranger to your own children.
You have monsters to slay and villains to battle.
We should be grateful we get to see you at all.
You must be starving.
Come on, let me fix you something to eat.
Wait.
Let me say hello to the kids, first.
Oh! What am I thinking about? Children! Your father's home! - Daddy's home? - Aeson.
- It really is Daddy! Daddy! - Ilea.
- Daddy, I missed you.
- I missed you too, Ilea.
- I missed you all so much.
- Are you crying, Daddy? No, no, it's the wind just blew something in my eye.
Ilea my little baby.
One arm for each of you! Yeah! OK, everybody, let's sit down and eat before the food gets cold.
In a minute.
I just wanna finish teaching these boys how to wrestle, first.
Whoa! Who's there? Who was that? Who was that? Oh, you wanna wrestle, too? Huh? You act like you haven't been home in ages.
Why, I just wanna enjoy this while I can.
You know, if something else comes up and I'm off, again.
Well, let's enjoy it, later.
Let's eat first.
All right, let's go! Whoa! Hey! Wait a minute! This isn't fair! Ohhhh! Hi.
Hi.
You know, I don't understand.
You haven't eaten anything all night.
- You OK? - Hmm, I've never felt better.
Well, you would think that fighting hydras and protecting the innocent would work up some kind of appetite.
My appetite is fine.
I've got other things on my mind.
Well, maybe food is not what you're hungry for.
You're probably not ready for a main course.
A little appetizer? A little something to nibble on? - Nibbling is good.
- Hm-hmmmm, I've got just the place.
Show me.
- Hades, don't be a voyeur.
- They do make a nice couple.
Come on.
Give them some privacy.
Give me one good reason.
I can give you several.
Come on.
Leave them alone.
Clonis, you are getting so strong.
'Cause I wanna be just like you when I grow up, Daddy.
I wanna drive chariots when I grow up, Dad.
Oh yeah? You think you can handle this? Yeah! Huh? I'm gonna get you guys! I'm gonna get you! You're not getting away from me! Persephone.
- Hercules.
- How did you get away from Hades? He's off doing his rounds in Tartarus.
Well, you weren't tied up, or guarded? Why? Where is there to run? - How's my mom? - How do you think? Maker of thunderstorms and tornadoes.
She's so sensitive.
Any little thing goes wrong, - and she has these giant mood swings.
- I've noticed.
I keep telling her to take some herbs or something help even it out.
Ah, she'll be fine once we get you back.
Back where? What's wrong? - Is she in trouble? - Yeah.
Oh.
So, I guess that means you'll be leaving again.
Well, I can't let either one of you leave on an empty stomach.
How about if I fix you guys something to eat? - Oh, I'm starving, but I can't.
- Oh, of course you can! Come on! Come on in the house! Ah.
Doesn't she know we can't eat the food from the other side? Deianeira, the kids, they don't know they're dead.
They're reliving the happiest moments of their lives.
- What is it? - That pig.
- What about it? - It belongs to the swineherd I was talking to when Hades grabbed me.
Oh, OK.
It's from above and you're really hungry.
Oh, it's not that.
His pigs were like family.
We have to get that one back.
Persephone, right now my problem is getting you back.
Please.
What is it with people and pigs? Don't go anywhere.
Come here! Why do I get myself into these things? We cannot rest until we fill the well.
Don't bother.
If he had lived a better life, he wouldn't be here.
- Hades.
- Welcome to Tartarus or, as I like to refer to it as the other side of the other side.
- That's cruel.
- No crueler than he was in his previous life.
- Believe me, he deserves it.
- Tickle, tickle.
- How does it feel? - And you better watch yourself if you wanna return to the world as you know it.
Do you know what's going on up there? - I hear Demeter is a little mad.
- 'Gone mad' is more accurate.
She's ruined the harvest with winter storms.
- People are starving dying.
- The woman does have her moods.
What do you expect? You kidnapped her only daughter.
'Kidnapped.
' Demeter would say that.
You were wrong in taking her, Hades.
She's going back.
Not if I can help it.
A chain is only as strong as its weakest link.
Huh.
The direct approach.
Here, let me help you.
Huh.
Head on.
Head on.
Good luck, my friend.
His bark is worse than his bite.
A chain's weakest link.
Head on.
Well, my friend, maybe you weren't so delirious after all.
Cerberus.
We've been down this road, before.
I didn't hurt you then, I won't now.
So much for a guard dog.
Shh.
Sh.
- Hercules, what are you doing here? - I thought we went over that.
But how did you get past Hades' dog? We're old acquaintances.
Get dressed.
You know, Hades really isn't so bad.
Right, the guy who abducts girls and pigs.
They should build a statue for him.
He just has this reputation of being cold and uncaring.
People forget he's also in charge of the Elysian Fields.
- You like him? - I think he's wonderful.
Look, if he's been cruel to anyone in Tartarus, it's because they deserve it.
And besides - he's kind of sexy.
- 'Sexy'? He kidnaps you, your mother sends nature on a rampage, and all you can think of is 'Sexy'? So, he's not perfect.
Who is? That doesn't mean he can't change if the right person came along.
Well, it won't be you.
Do you two have any idea what your mother's moods have done to mankind? - People are dying up there.
- I'm sorry.
- I-I didn't realize.
- Well, you do now.
Let's get going.
- Wait.
- What? - The pig.
- Oh, I wondered where he went.
I've had enough of your squealing.
I think it's best if you wait back here.
Hold this! Thanks.
Let's go.
I won't be that easy.
Wait over there.
Let's settle this right now.
Stop it! This isn't gonna prove anything! Take this, instead! - Give it up! - I'll fight you unarmed if I have to but I won't let her go! Hades, I'm taking her! Give it up, Hercules! You're no match for a god! Stop! Both of you! That's a heck of a right you have.
You took it pretty well.
You took most of my best shots, too.
You sure we can't talk this out? I mean we can keep this up all day, but eventually I am gonna beat you.
I doubt it, but let's talk.
I gotta catch my breath.
Tell me how much do you love Deianeira? It's beyond measure.
When she and the kids went out of my life, it left a void that can never be filled.
That's how I feel about Persephone.
I-- I just wish her mother would understand that.
Have you talked to her about it? Talked, cajoled, pleaded, threatened, I've tried everything.
She just won't let her have anything to do with me.
- Mothers can be very protective.
- Try 'Overprotective.
' I don't know, maybe it's my manner or my clothes.
They won't even let me come around the Elysian Fields - any more, claim I'm too gloomy.
- A change in wardrobe couldn't hurt.
You think I dress badly? - Well, not badly, but dark.
- Take a look around you! You think this is a fun job? Not only have I got the Elysian Fields to think of, I've got Tartarus and the Asphodel Meadows! I've got an image to uphold! Dress however you want.
What are we gonna do about Persephone? Hercules, she's the only bright spot in this whole place.
Can't help that.
What you did was wrong.
If you take her, I'll be doomed to the same emptiness you felt when you lost your whole family.
I can't let her stay.
I made a deal.
Persephone, let's go.
Hercules, take your wife.
I'll change the rules.
Take your whole family if you want to anyone.
Just leave Persephone here please.
I can't.
Hercules! Well, there you are? Where have you been? Deianeira, we have to talk.
Persephone? Deianeira, I are you all right? It's just that it feels so strange.
It's like you don't belong here.
I don't.
I have been gone a long time but you and the children have been gone a long time, as well.
What are you saying? This isn't my home.
I'm not dead yet.
- And we are? - Yeah.
Oh, I thought it might be something like that.
Things just haven't seemed right since you first showed up.
You're in the Elysian Fields.
I've wanted to tell you-- Oh, it doesn't matter.
We made the best of this time together.
Deianeira, I-I can take you back, you and the children.
Want some fruit? What would be the price of our going? Persephone would have to stay here.
It doesn't seem like she's eager to leave.
There's more to it.
Demeter is punishing mankind by withholding the harvest until her daughter returns.
So people are starving and they're dying.
And the little problems of our family just pale in comparison, don't they? Hercules, you're needed above.
There's nobody who can do what you can do.
It's not like we haven't been happy.
- Till I returned and upset things.
- No, don't say that.
Seeing you brought me more joy than you could have ever dreamed of.
But just promise me one thing.
Anything.
That no matter how long it takes that you and I will be back together again.
I promise.
Oh, Deianeira I'll miss you.
I love you so much.
I'll miss you, my love.
Kids, I have to go.
Clonis.
Come back soon, Daddy.
You be good.
Aeson, you listen to your mother.
- When will you be back? - I'll be back before you know it.
Ilea.
Don't go, Daddy.
We better go.
Go.
Ha-ha-ha.
Oh, now that's, uh, tree gloves of garlic, a pinch a basil, oh, oh, oh, boy, I'm lookin' forward to this.
Yeah.
Ha-ha.
Ooh.
Sorry.
Ha-ha.
Ha.
Hey, where're you goin' with my pig? I promised I'd give you the recipe.
I didn't say I'd let you use it.
Ah, now wait a minute! Ah, no, I can't believe he did that! Whatever happened to respect? Hercules! No, no second thoughts.
We're going! - Hercules, please, wait! - He doesn't give up, does he? I-I can't go.
I love him.
Sorry, we don't have time to debate this.
Hercules, I've changed my mind! - I want to go with you! - Hold on.
Please, please don't leave me here.
Please! Don't leave me! Here, grab my hand! Still want me to let go? I didn't think so.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Come on.
- Persephone! - Mother! Wait! - You can't go out there.
- She belongs to me.
You know the rules.
Hercules made it back.
I know the rules: 'Eat it and weep.
' - You ate the food of the other side? - I couldn't help it, I was starving.
Hercules brought her back! She stays with me! - She ate the food, she's mine! - Now hold on, both of you! I hear a lot about what you want and what you want, but I don't hear what she wants.
Well, Persephone, what do you want? I don't know both, I guess.
- You can't.
- You have to pick.
She already has.
She wants both.
She can have both.
She ate half the fruit.
That means she can stay half the year on the other side with Hades half, on Earth with her mother.
- There's no way! - I'll take it to Zeus! Quiet! Does that work for you, Persephone? Then it should work, for all of you.
Who gets her first? That's for Persephone to decide.
Mankind is suffering.
Mother needs to get nature back on course.
- Six months really isn't that long.
- It'll seem like an eternity.
Oh, Hades! - Oh! - Ah! Not one word.
I'll see you soon, my love.
Think of me.
Oh, I missed you, my dear.
Now if you don't mind, I've got some pigs to deliver.
Hercules, you have acted bravely and fairly throughout all this.
Would you like to see your family one last time? Sleep well, my children, and hold your father in your dreams.
I can wipe their minds of all the memories of your visit if you think it'll make it easier for them.
They'll be completely happy again? - Then do it.
- I wish I could do the same for you.
No.
On this side, memories are all we really own.
I know we'll be together again, some day.
I want to hold onto that.
Thank you.
Captioned by Grantman Brown