Life On Mars (UK) (2006) s02e08 Episode Script
Episode 8
Do you want to know where I really come from? I'm bloody sick of 1973.
Talk to me, somebody.
You've been making calls to my phone.
- You know the rules.
- What rules? Who was I just talking to? - And you are? - Frank Morgan.
Acting DCI.
Hang in there, Sam.
Soon as we can bring you back home.
I know this is the right number.
It's Hyde 2612.
I'm sorry, sir, there's still no answer.
Alvin Stardust.
How's about that, then? Wow! The big news is that they've found the cause of Sam's prolonged coma.
Oooh! Now, then, guys and gals, there's a tumour in the temporal lobe of Sam's brain.
They thought it was a clot, but how's about that, a clot it is not.
Wow! And it may be operable.
Double wow! As it happens, we hear today if Sam is strong enough for the operation.
If he is, our very good friends at the hospital say they can cut out the tumour.
Cut it out? Cut it out? Fix it for me, Jim! And here she is with a request for the lad himself, the gorgeous Ruth Tyler.
Mum.
Sam? Sam? They need to be sure you're strong enough for this operation.
I'm alive in here.
I'm strong enough.
But the surgeon, Mr Morgan, says this is the best window of opportunity they have.
Morgan? Frank Morgan? Sam, darling, I've never given up on you.
I know that wherever you are, you're fighting to get back to us.
- Don't stop fighting now.
- Mum.
Mum.
Hello? Sam.
It's Frank Morgan.
Are you alone? Yes? Yeah, yeah, I'm alone.
I know you know what you're doing, but we need to step up a gear.
We need to end this.
And then I can I can come home? Of course.
We let him slip.
Just when we had him in our sights.
What's our next move? Right.
Um, yeah Sam, we're down to our last window of opportunity.
When we complete the operation - Yes, yes.
The operation.
you can come home.
It's time.
You must destroy Gene Hunt and his whole rotten department.
I have to destroy Gene Hunt.
And then I can come home.
My name is Sam Tyler.
I had an accident and I woke up in 1973.
Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet.
Now, maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home.
You're not above the law, Gene.
I should do you for speeding.
Oh, shut up, Dorothy.
What the bloody hell? Sod this.
Get out the way, you bitches! - Bastard! - Go on a diet, you lardy cow! Boss, is this your bra? Guv.
It's Danny Croucher.
- Oh, shit.
- So, what, you knew him? He came to the pub the other night in a right old to-do.
Danny Croucher was a face worker at the Egerton Colliery.
Decent bloke, no previous.
Got himself caught up in the planning of a wages heist.
Knew he'd done wrong.
Came to us for help.
The plan is to hit the wages somewhere en route from the NUM bank to the colliery pay office.
So miners are planning this? The whole thing's being masterminded by career blaggers.
Dunno who.
Danny was hired through another miner, a go-between.
Danny was too scared to give a name.
He'd grassed up a professional blag.
Why didn't you offer him protection? I thought if we pushed him back out on the street, exposed, like it might draw out our blaggers.
- Well, it almost worked, didn't it? - Hear that, Danny? It nearly worked.
I'm gonna find his killer.
Chris, Ray.
Find me somebody who knows something.
- Yes, Guv.
- We may still have a blag.
We need to keep this quiet so we can turn in a solid lead.
It's too late, it's over.
You failed.
This man came to you for help.
Smells like a tart's boudoir in here.
Just removing my clutter.
The filing cabinet's where I keep all my severed heads.
- I shan't detain you any further.
- Wipe your feet on the way out.
Some of us have a job to be getting on with.
- Do you need a hand with that, sir? - Thank you very much.
Look, you said on the phone this was our last window of opportunity to finish the operation.
I just want to clarify a few things.
Expose that foetid man as the criminally negligent copper he so obviously is.
Clear enough? Criminally negligent? That shouldn't be too hard.
This isn't the time or the place, but do you have something for me? A man was murdered today.
The Guv used him as bait when he should have been protecting him.
Hunt does things his way and people get hurt.
Or killed.
Document the handling of this enquiry.
We need hard evidence, Sam.
I want written reports and tape recordings of Hunt's methods.
So that's what it takes to get me home.
Yeah? Destroy Gene Hunt? He's out of control, Sam.
Like a cancer.
The sooner we cut him out The sooner I can leave.
If you're strong enough to go through with this operation.
I'll get the evidence you need, if that's what it takes.
- And then you can bring me home.
- Good.
None of you are real.
And Gene Hunt is a tumour in my head.
Once it's removed you'll be gone.
Nothing.
Just so we understand each other, sir, you'd better start finding me some face-parts.
We know a vicious bastard's working with the miners on a blag and he may well know you're in here talking to us.
So this is in your own interest, OK? What? Grab 'em by the balls and their hearts and minds will surely follow.
- That is policing.
- Hey, Guv.
Look at this.
It's Bruce Forsyth.
Our definitions of policing may vary marginally.
- And yours is? - Serve the public trust.
Protect the innocent.
Uphold the law.
Training college? RoboCop.
You can't uphold the law by breaking it.
It's a waste of time, this, Guv.
This joker hasn't seen a sausage.
He knows nowt about the miners' blag.
- Nick him for wasting police time.
- Eh? So one man dies and you threaten another just because you haven't got a lead.
You know, I find Unbelievable.
Unbelievable.
I'm doing it again.
Trying to change you.
What's the point? Just forget I said anything.
Thank you.
I will.
Right.
Let's start interrogating miners.
Pull in Don Sykes, he's never far from trouble.
He's ready for his pre-med now.
You need to keep fighting.
Stay strong for the operation.
I'm strong enough.
Put me under the knife.
For God's sake, don't you let me down again.
- What you doing in here? - Waiting.
Er waiting for this, as it goes.
Sorry.
It's just I'm looking forward to getting this over with.
Why is that? Annie.
I have to go away.
Soon.
For how long? Holiday? It's, er family and friends.
But I I was wondering before I go, I'd like to spend more time with you.
Really, Sam.
What's this all about? Where are you going? Far away.
Off you jolly well trot, love.
Boys' Brigade meeting.
Take a seat, Mr Sykes.
We know you miners are working with pros on a wages blag.
It's my guess you're the bridge man.
I want a name.
Who's the evil bastard behind this? Our bet is that you hired Danny Croucher for this robbery.
Danny got scared, he came to us.
You told your boss, and your boss shot Danny in cold blood.
I ain't talking.
Who shot Danny? Talk.
You can do what you like, I'm saying nowt.
Ray, get two sets of cuffs.
Let's get creative.
Guv, you have just used unnecessary restraint on a suspect by handcuffing him to a chair.
What are you, the narrator? Hold him.
For what it's worth, you're contravening several human rights laws.
And I've told you before, human rights are for human beings.
Who's running this blag? Give us the name.
I don't know the main man.
It's all done over the phone with his lads.
I'm not a squealer.
Bing! Wrong answer.
You, my friend, are three steps down the food chain from a maggot.
I have no problem watching a maggot twisting about on a hook with its guts spilling out.
Please.
Stop, please! I'll tell you, I'll tell you! I'll tell you, OK? I'll tell you his name.
There's a good maggot.
Leslie Johns.
His name is Leslie Johns.
The cop- killer? Right, Sykes, where do I find Leslie Johns? I can't tell you.
They'll kill me.
Tell me, or I'll kill you.
Scalpel.
Ready for first incision.
Here we go.
That's it.
You're operating.
It's begun.
Let's hope he's strong enough.
I'm strong enough, Mr Morgan.
You cut that cancer out.
Sam? Sam? The Guv was looking for you.
Sykes won't stop talking.
The wonders of torture.
Anyway, he'll he'll brief you tomorrow, so Do you want to come in? So you haven't started packing yet? For your great escape.
Look, we both know I've never belonged here.
I don't know.
I thought it was all working out.
I felt for the first time like we were all part of a team.
I'm amazed that you want to leave that.
This.
I told you before I don't hate everything about this place.
Hasn't stopped yet.
It's amazing.
Well, I'm fond of it.
Snap.
Yours is racing.
It's roaring.
You should see a doctor.
That's a good idea.
Listen, Annie.
Whatever time I have left here, I'd really like to spend it with you.
You don't have to go.
How can I stay here with you? It's impossible.
God, you're like a riddle, you are.
Just as I think I understand you like a mist, you move away from me again.
Why would you have to go just like that? - I can't tell you.
You wouldn't understand.
- Try me.
Spend the night with me, Annie.
Just once.
No questions, no answers.
Just you and me.
One night? I can't stay here forever.
I can't stay for one night.
Gone.
Annie.
Wait.
Knock knock.
Jesus.
This this is it, isn't it? Morgan's operating, isn't he? - Very serious and very nasty.
- It has to be done.
But it's a very messy job, Sam.
Are you strong enough? Sam, help us! Stay strong.
None of this is real.
They can't feel pain, can they? None of this is real.
None of this is real.
I'm coming home.
- Stay strong.
I'm coming home.
- Not long now.
Stay strong.
None of thi None of this is real.
As of last night, this thing's gone into top gear.
Don Sykes kindly offered us the name of the Mr Big behind this robbery.
Leslie Johns.
Career blagger.
One of Britain's most wanted.
Specialises in high-risk jobs.
Lots of firepower involved.
Racks up casualties, doesn't care.
- And to top it all off, he's a cop-killer.
- Bastard.
So we need to stop him before there's any more bodies.
Now, Leslie Johns has never met Don Sykes.
So I'm going to pose as Sykes and meet him, and find out the details of this wages robbery.
Then we place officers in key positions.
That way we can nab him red-handed and stop the vicious bastard killing again.
Can I remind you that this is a ruthless armed gang led by a psychopathic cop-killer.
He's dangerous.
We need fully trained firearms officers.
I'll tool the lads up.
Without official sanction, this is illegal, Guv.
Since when has catching evil scum become illegal? You're right.
Your gaff, your rules.
You nab Johns any way you see fit.
- This my copy of "Just Jugs"? - Yeah.
What are you doing with it? There's an interview with Kingsley Amis that I really want to read.
Kingsley You know, the saddest thing is, I believe you.
Bloody hell, he looks like Andy Capp.
Undercover stake-outs and that.
This is what I signed up for.
It's not "The Famous Five", Chris.
Oh, don't spoil it, boss.
Wasting your breath, Chris.
He's never stood shoulder to shoulder with us, and he never will.
There he is.
Let's just kick him to death now.
He'll not be mourned.
Easy does it, Sergeant.
Guv's in like Flint.
Looks like we're on.
Right, the plan is the train carrying the wages will be stopped somewhere en route to the colliery.
Johns and his gang of six, including meself, strike immediately.
Wages are then transferred into Johns's van.
He then takes a hostage for security.
It's what he does.
As soon as he thinks he's in the clear, he'll top 'em.
Remember, you're dealing with a psycho.
Ray and Sam, you'll replace NUM security and ride with the wages.
Up for a bit of play-acting, Raymondo? Doddle, Guv.
It's not "Hamlet".
That's good, because "Hamlet" is a tragedy.
Trust you to know that.
Poof.
Chris and Annie, you'll be on board as train staff.
Sorry, Cartwright, but they'll be expecting a bird.
Are you sure this is the only way to nail him, Guv? Of course it is.
I don't do this for me health, you know.
I know we're dealing with a cop-killer, but I have a responsibility to this city and I will move heaven and earth to stop this man.
Now, he doesn't play by any rules.
Nor should we.
What have you got? He's planned an undercover sting to catch Leslie Johns.
He's sending in regular DCs without firearms backup.
A tape recording.
Full written report.
Thank you.
There.
I've done my bit.
When can I go home? Hang on, I need a credible officer to take the stand against Hunt.
- You'll have to bear witness.
- Look, I have done everything I can.
Now it's up to you to complete this operation and get me home.
Well, that's only half of it, Sam.
We're not only dismantling A Division, we're rebuilding it.
- That was always the plan.
- What plan? Metropolitan Accountability and Reconciliation Strategy.
Taking on corruption in the force.
We have to prove to the public that we're exorcising the cancer.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But we're not talking about boffing up a few local bobbies here.
There's a lot more at stake.
Huh? Yeah? Sorry, I don't think we're quite on the same sheet of paper.
What exactly are you saying? I know why you're really here.
So why am I really here? OK.
I'm in a coma in the future.
This is not real.
You are the surgeon who is going to bring me home.
Now that I've given you the power to destroy Gene Hunt, who is the cancer that is holding me here in this place.
You're in a coma in the future? It's a good one, in't it? Well, this explains a lot.
- It must be the crash.
- Crash? You had an accident on on the way to A Division all those months ago.
I did think about aborting the operation, but you were coping.
You'd successfully gone undercover.
Do you remember your original brief? Do you remember your real life back in Hyde? Of course not.
Because this is not real.
You have amnesia, Sam.
I'm in a coma.
Frank.
You hear voices? You hear doctors and nurses telling you to come home soon? Look, this is the real world, Sam.
But this has happened to you before.
Where are we going? I'm afraid this isn't going to be very pleasant, Sam.
Your parents died in a coach crash.
No, they didn't.
You were 12.
Remember what happened? You closed down.
Week in, week out, sitting bolt upright on your hospital bed.
Silent.
Still.
They said it was like a waking coma.
- No, I I don't.
- And then you came back.
Stronger.
Wait, wait, wait.
I don't know where you've got this from, but this is total bullshit.
Sam, you told me about what happened to you when you were a child.
We shared all of this during your appraisal.
Look, look.
I was involved in a coach crash when I was 12.
Yeah, I broke my arm.
But nobody else was hurt.
And yes, I did spend a little bit of time in hospital.
But What? Who are these people? They're your parents.
The last time I looked, my name was Tyler.
Sam, you must remember.
You are DCI Sam Williams of C Division, Hyde.
My name is Tyler! Now, I've had enough of this shit.
This is a dream and I have done what I need to do to wake up.
This is where we created your fake life for the undercover operation.
I met Vic Tyler.
Really? Where is he? - He's gone away.
- And your mum, Ruth? I don't know.
No.
No, wait, she she spoke to me.
I heard her on on on my radio.
She's in your head, Sam.
You've lost your memory and replaced it with your undercover identity.
No.
No.
You, you're in my head.
I'm being saved by some brilliant surgeon in the future somewhere.
Sam.
You have an amazing mind, but it's damaged.
Look at their graves.
They don't exist.
It's all in your head.
Sam? Sam? It's 1973.
No, this is, er this can't be.
This is not this is not real.
- No, no.
- Sam, wait! Don't ruin the operation now! Sam.
I'm so impressed, Sam, with everything that's happened.
You've done your job.
You've held it together.
You've earned their respect.
Once we're done with all this, we take control of A Division, police it progressively.
You'll be working right alongside me.
That's what you've always wanted.
What I've always wanted.
Running the city the right way.
If this is real then Gene has a life.
What's going to happen to him? He'll be pensioned off.
It'll kill him.
There must be thousands of officers like Gene Hunt out there.
Why? We only need make an example of one.
But he gets results.
You can't deny that.
Oh, he's impressive, in his way.
And so were the dinosaurs.
Hang in there, Sam, I need you.
And you can still have what you want.
You can still come home to people who appreciate you.
I need more time.
I can't think.
You can't uphold the law by breaking it.
It's what you've always said.
Gene Hunt is breaking the law.
He's a man building his own gallows.
All we're doing is handing him the wood.
We can't let him put those officers in danger.
Here.
Latest thing.
It's a mobile radio.
I'm on channel 4.
You just say the word and we can be there with armed backup to get your officers out safely.
- And then? - And then we arrest DCI Hunt for gross professional negligence and corruption.
Good luck, Sam.
You're almost home.
Right, now this is serious, OK? Going to be crossing a line here.
But whatever happens, I want you to know I'll be right in there with you.
We're going to stop this bastard from killing more innocent people.
To the Guv.
- The Guv.
- Good luck.
To the Guv.
I see a darkness in you, Sam.
Oh, you can see into me, can you, Nelson? Well, come on, then.
Am I mad? Huh? Is this real? Come on.
I just want to know the truth.
We all want that, Sam.
What's real.
What's not.
I see folk who walk about in a sunken dream, 'cause they feel nothing.
Are they alive? I wake up every morning and I tell myself I am alive.
When you can feel, then you're alive.
When you don't feel, you're not.
One word.
That's all I'm after.
Tell me I'm imagining all of this.
Tell me I'm not imagining all of you.
Moderate or good.
Moderate or rough It's only just gone six.
I didn't know you liked the shipping forecast.
Anyway, how come you left the pub so quickly last night? Will you will you will you just hold me, please? This must be what it feels like to be mad.
Tell me what's hurting you.
I can't.
You're going to leave us, aren't you? I was always going to leave you.
I mean we both wondered why I'd never fitted in around here.
Well, turns out turns out I was sent here by Morgan to gather evidence against the Guv.
- What? - You have got to believe me.
I didn't know I was betraying you.
I'm so confused.
I feel like I felt the first day I walked in here.
- Boss? - Not disturbing you two, are we? Eh? This sting is madness.
I'm stopping it.
We shouldn't be going in like this.
I don't want anybody to get hurt.
Too late.
Guv went to see Johns last night.
- He's undercover now.
- Last night? - That wasn't part of the plan.
- Got itchy feet, I suppose.
You see? This is just the type of thing that we're trying to stop.
Who's trying to stop? I'm, er I'm working in conjunction with C Division in Hyde.
- What? - I'm undercover.
Here.
You've been spying on us all along? No, I - I didn't I - All this time.
I knew it.
I bloody knew it! I'm trying to save your lives here.
I am not your enemy! Cut the crap! You've been our enemy since day one.
- This is not easy for me, you know.
- I looked up to you, Sam.
I always tried to take on board the things you said.
You've been laughing at us behind our backs with your fancy Hyde mates.
No, no.
No.
No, th this I don't know which way is up any more.
You know? I can't explain this.
You don't have to.
We get it.
Well, you can't stop the Guv's plans.
He's undercover now, risking his life for this city again.
Leslie Johns will be expecting two guards on that train, so you'll have to be there.
But I'll tell you this.
If the Guv goes down, we all go down.
Chris.
Annie.
That's why you're going away, isn't it? I bet some days you can hardly face yourself in the mirror.
All your doubts and worries.
And to think I actually felt sorry for you.
It hurts, doesn't it? That's because it's real.
Here we go.
No histrionics.
The less we say, the less chance we have of getting caught out.
Tricks of the trade.
All right, mate? Transferring wages to the colliery.
I don't know you two.
Where's your D-7? - Load up.
- Ta.
- Do you want a hand with that? - No, I can manage, thanks.
Right, load them up.
Chop-chop.
Yeah, come on.
Chop-chop.
Good work.
Shut up.
Make sure we secure Johns before he has the chance to take one of you hostage, OK? OK? The Guv says we don't nick 'em until they've got their hands on a substantial load of cash.
- How do we know when that is? - We wait for the nod.
He's in charge here.
I didn't start this.
It was Hunt.
Now, if anything goes wrong, I can radio in for armed backup.
And your Hyde mates'll ride in on their big white chargers, will they? They've thrown the signal.
This is it.
Now just be careful, OK? What's going on? This is a robbery.
Open the door! Please, don't hurt us.
Don't give us cause to.
Right, Sykes, get up there.
Start the chain.
Right, play pass the parcel! Move it! - Put your backs into it, now.
- Move it! - Faster.
Come on! - Let's keep it calm.
- Lovely.
- Come on! - Keep calm and wait for my signal.
- Come on! - What's that? - Come in - It's a police radio.
- Bloody Sykes! - You bastard.
It's a stitch-up! - Quick, take cover! Where the hell did that radio come from? - Morgan! - Morgan? Morgan! - What's going on? - He stitched us up.
He's working for them at Hyde.
They're trying to bring you down.
Bring us all down.
- Shit.
- Morgan, get us out of here.
Sam.
Tell me this isn't true.
Call me a traitor if you want, Guv, but I can get us out of the shit you dropped us in! - Morgan! - Looks like lover boy isn't coming.
It won't be enough for him.
He wants to kill us.
Sod this.
Oh, God, please, just make them stop.
Chris, it'll be all right! We're sitting ducks.
They'll keep firing until there's no train left.
It's all your fault, you Judas! Do something! OK, I will.
Where the hell are you going? - We need backup.
- You're just saving your own skin! Sam I promise you I won't leave you.
Let him go, then.
We'll cover you.
Morgan.
Morgan! Morgan.
Thank God.
I've been trying to get you on the radio.
Come on.
Let's get you out of here.
What? Where's the backup? - There is no backup, Sam.
- What do you mean, no backup? Use your head.
What better way to ruin Hunt for ever? He's responsible for a botched illegal sting and put his officers in mortal danger.
And you would let them die to prove a point? Because they are going to be killed in there! He put his men on the line.
With himself at the front! We can't leave them in there.
They're trapped in there! Somebody will hear the shooting and raise the alarm.
You've done your job, Sam, and you've done it brilliantly.
You were strong.
I knew you would be.
Come on.
Hyde is waiting.
No, I've had enough.
I don't want to be a policeman any more! Don't shoot! Chris! No We've got to help them.
Morgan! - Morgan! - Come on, you bastards! Come on.
Bastards! You've done it, Sam.
It's over.
Tyler! Sam! Help us.
One simple move and you're home.
- Home? You mean - Sam! - Get us backup! - Help us! - Come back to us.
- Tyler! Sam, darling.
Come back to us.
Sam, please come back Sam.
I'm Frank Morgan.
I'm your surgeon.
I managed to relieve the swelling, which is it's why you've woken up.
I'm afraid the tumour was too deeply embedded to be removed.
It is, however, totally benign.
It's amazing that I got you back at all.
Quite an achievement.
My name is Sam Tyler.
I had an accident and I woke up in 1973.
I had no idea if I was mad or if I was in a coma, or if I'd gone back in time.
It was like I'd woken up on a different planet.
But I knew that if I could find out the reason then I could get home.
DI Sam T DCI Sam Tyler, Greater Manchester Police.
You wanted me to deliver something to Psych Evaluation Division? Yeah, thanks.
Um You OK? Yeah.
Yeah.
There's this officer.
She's, er collecting collecting stuff from colleagues who've who've suffered trauma.
You know.
Anyway, it's good to talk about it, actually.
Thanks.
I went someplace, Mum.
And every day I woke up in that place and I told myself, "I'm alive.
" And I was.
In some ways, more than I've ever been.
You know, a a barman a barman once told me that you know when you're alive because you can feel.
And you know when you're not because you don't feel anything.
I made a promise, Mum.
I made a promise to someone who I care about very much.
Then they've got nothing to worry about.
'Cause you always keep your promises.
The question is whether we have real grounds to move for a statute on Unless you can isolate psychotic tendency and have that verified, you'll never hold a suspect for longer than 24 hours What do you feel, Sam? Sam? Sorry.
Is it unethical to move for 48-hour custodial without formal charge in violent cases that may require detailed psychoanalysis? Um Sam.
Look at your hand.
I can't feel it.
What? Er Sorry.
Excuse me.
Sam! Help us! Tyler! He's going to kill us all! No.
Now you're just showing off.
You OK? I told you I wouldn't leave you.
- Oh, lucky us.
- I'm sorry.
Sorry? Is that it? - Come here.
- Get off, I'm not a fairy.
Hey.
Nice to have you back, mon brave.
Good to see you, Nelson.
- What you having? - Scotch.
Large one.
In fact, make it a bottle.
Seeing as you're buying, boss, I'll have a port and lemon.
Boss.
That stuff I said I was angry in there.
I'll pay for the phone.
Chris.
You're going to make a good copper.
Really? That's fantastic.
What do you mean, "going to make a good copper"? Have a drink.
- I got shot because of you.
- I know.
- I'm truly sorry, Ray.
- Still I met a bird, medical bird.
Called nurses.
Big tits.
Arse like two Cox's Pippins in a bag.
- She sounds enigmatic.
- No.
She was from Barnsley.
Go and find her, then.
Who? I'm not just a sex goddess, you know, boss.
I have a pair of eyes in me head.
Go.
You OK? What? Tell me.
Tell you what, Sam? Tell me what I should do, Annie.
Stay.
Here.
Forever.
All right, then, I will.
Tyler! Put that soppy plonk down and get in! Blag on in Archer Lane.
Shots fired.
Lovely.
You two tarts, get in! And you, flash knickers.
You shouldn't be driving with that leg.
- Well, I am.
- You were shot.
So will you be if you don't get in! Move it! It's no good.
He's slipping away from us.
Sam? Sam? God, I hate that channel.
That's better.
- What are you doing, Raymondo? - Can't get the door shut.
- I should be driving.
- You drive like my Aunt Mabel.
If you injure somebody in this car, it's technically a criminal offence.
Shut up, you noncey-arsed fairy boy.
Such elegant banter.
Try and keep it under 70.
Oh, and radio in for uniform.
- I don't need Plod in the way.
- It's procedure.
You're not above the law, Guv.
What are you on about, Tyler? I am the law.
Yeah, in your dreams.
Talk to me, somebody.
You've been making calls to my phone.
- You know the rules.
- What rules? Who was I just talking to? - And you are? - Frank Morgan.
Acting DCI.
Hang in there, Sam.
Soon as we can bring you back home.
I know this is the right number.
It's Hyde 2612.
I'm sorry, sir, there's still no answer.
Alvin Stardust.
How's about that, then? Wow! The big news is that they've found the cause of Sam's prolonged coma.
Oooh! Now, then, guys and gals, there's a tumour in the temporal lobe of Sam's brain.
They thought it was a clot, but how's about that, a clot it is not.
Wow! And it may be operable.
Double wow! As it happens, we hear today if Sam is strong enough for the operation.
If he is, our very good friends at the hospital say they can cut out the tumour.
Cut it out? Cut it out? Fix it for me, Jim! And here she is with a request for the lad himself, the gorgeous Ruth Tyler.
Mum.
Sam? Sam? They need to be sure you're strong enough for this operation.
I'm alive in here.
I'm strong enough.
But the surgeon, Mr Morgan, says this is the best window of opportunity they have.
Morgan? Frank Morgan? Sam, darling, I've never given up on you.
I know that wherever you are, you're fighting to get back to us.
- Don't stop fighting now.
- Mum.
Mum.
Hello? Sam.
It's Frank Morgan.
Are you alone? Yes? Yeah, yeah, I'm alone.
I know you know what you're doing, but we need to step up a gear.
We need to end this.
And then I can I can come home? Of course.
We let him slip.
Just when we had him in our sights.
What's our next move? Right.
Um, yeah Sam, we're down to our last window of opportunity.
When we complete the operation - Yes, yes.
The operation.
you can come home.
It's time.
You must destroy Gene Hunt and his whole rotten department.
I have to destroy Gene Hunt.
And then I can come home.
My name is Sam Tyler.
I had an accident and I woke up in 1973.
Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet.
Now, maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home.
You're not above the law, Gene.
I should do you for speeding.
Oh, shut up, Dorothy.
What the bloody hell? Sod this.
Get out the way, you bitches! - Bastard! - Go on a diet, you lardy cow! Boss, is this your bra? Guv.
It's Danny Croucher.
- Oh, shit.
- So, what, you knew him? He came to the pub the other night in a right old to-do.
Danny Croucher was a face worker at the Egerton Colliery.
Decent bloke, no previous.
Got himself caught up in the planning of a wages heist.
Knew he'd done wrong.
Came to us for help.
The plan is to hit the wages somewhere en route from the NUM bank to the colliery pay office.
So miners are planning this? The whole thing's being masterminded by career blaggers.
Dunno who.
Danny was hired through another miner, a go-between.
Danny was too scared to give a name.
He'd grassed up a professional blag.
Why didn't you offer him protection? I thought if we pushed him back out on the street, exposed, like it might draw out our blaggers.
- Well, it almost worked, didn't it? - Hear that, Danny? It nearly worked.
I'm gonna find his killer.
Chris, Ray.
Find me somebody who knows something.
- Yes, Guv.
- We may still have a blag.
We need to keep this quiet so we can turn in a solid lead.
It's too late, it's over.
You failed.
This man came to you for help.
Smells like a tart's boudoir in here.
Just removing my clutter.
The filing cabinet's where I keep all my severed heads.
- I shan't detain you any further.
- Wipe your feet on the way out.
Some of us have a job to be getting on with.
- Do you need a hand with that, sir? - Thank you very much.
Look, you said on the phone this was our last window of opportunity to finish the operation.
I just want to clarify a few things.
Expose that foetid man as the criminally negligent copper he so obviously is.
Clear enough? Criminally negligent? That shouldn't be too hard.
This isn't the time or the place, but do you have something for me? A man was murdered today.
The Guv used him as bait when he should have been protecting him.
Hunt does things his way and people get hurt.
Or killed.
Document the handling of this enquiry.
We need hard evidence, Sam.
I want written reports and tape recordings of Hunt's methods.
So that's what it takes to get me home.
Yeah? Destroy Gene Hunt? He's out of control, Sam.
Like a cancer.
The sooner we cut him out The sooner I can leave.
If you're strong enough to go through with this operation.
I'll get the evidence you need, if that's what it takes.
- And then you can bring me home.
- Good.
None of you are real.
And Gene Hunt is a tumour in my head.
Once it's removed you'll be gone.
Nothing.
Just so we understand each other, sir, you'd better start finding me some face-parts.
We know a vicious bastard's working with the miners on a blag and he may well know you're in here talking to us.
So this is in your own interest, OK? What? Grab 'em by the balls and their hearts and minds will surely follow.
- That is policing.
- Hey, Guv.
Look at this.
It's Bruce Forsyth.
Our definitions of policing may vary marginally.
- And yours is? - Serve the public trust.
Protect the innocent.
Uphold the law.
Training college? RoboCop.
You can't uphold the law by breaking it.
It's a waste of time, this, Guv.
This joker hasn't seen a sausage.
He knows nowt about the miners' blag.
- Nick him for wasting police time.
- Eh? So one man dies and you threaten another just because you haven't got a lead.
You know, I find Unbelievable.
Unbelievable.
I'm doing it again.
Trying to change you.
What's the point? Just forget I said anything.
Thank you.
I will.
Right.
Let's start interrogating miners.
Pull in Don Sykes, he's never far from trouble.
He's ready for his pre-med now.
You need to keep fighting.
Stay strong for the operation.
I'm strong enough.
Put me under the knife.
For God's sake, don't you let me down again.
- What you doing in here? - Waiting.
Er waiting for this, as it goes.
Sorry.
It's just I'm looking forward to getting this over with.
Why is that? Annie.
I have to go away.
Soon.
For how long? Holiday? It's, er family and friends.
But I I was wondering before I go, I'd like to spend more time with you.
Really, Sam.
What's this all about? Where are you going? Far away.
Off you jolly well trot, love.
Boys' Brigade meeting.
Take a seat, Mr Sykes.
We know you miners are working with pros on a wages blag.
It's my guess you're the bridge man.
I want a name.
Who's the evil bastard behind this? Our bet is that you hired Danny Croucher for this robbery.
Danny got scared, he came to us.
You told your boss, and your boss shot Danny in cold blood.
I ain't talking.
Who shot Danny? Talk.
You can do what you like, I'm saying nowt.
Ray, get two sets of cuffs.
Let's get creative.
Guv, you have just used unnecessary restraint on a suspect by handcuffing him to a chair.
What are you, the narrator? Hold him.
For what it's worth, you're contravening several human rights laws.
And I've told you before, human rights are for human beings.
Who's running this blag? Give us the name.
I don't know the main man.
It's all done over the phone with his lads.
I'm not a squealer.
Bing! Wrong answer.
You, my friend, are three steps down the food chain from a maggot.
I have no problem watching a maggot twisting about on a hook with its guts spilling out.
Please.
Stop, please! I'll tell you, I'll tell you! I'll tell you, OK? I'll tell you his name.
There's a good maggot.
Leslie Johns.
His name is Leslie Johns.
The cop- killer? Right, Sykes, where do I find Leslie Johns? I can't tell you.
They'll kill me.
Tell me, or I'll kill you.
Scalpel.
Ready for first incision.
Here we go.
That's it.
You're operating.
It's begun.
Let's hope he's strong enough.
I'm strong enough, Mr Morgan.
You cut that cancer out.
Sam? Sam? The Guv was looking for you.
Sykes won't stop talking.
The wonders of torture.
Anyway, he'll he'll brief you tomorrow, so Do you want to come in? So you haven't started packing yet? For your great escape.
Look, we both know I've never belonged here.
I don't know.
I thought it was all working out.
I felt for the first time like we were all part of a team.
I'm amazed that you want to leave that.
This.
I told you before I don't hate everything about this place.
Hasn't stopped yet.
It's amazing.
Well, I'm fond of it.
Snap.
Yours is racing.
It's roaring.
You should see a doctor.
That's a good idea.
Listen, Annie.
Whatever time I have left here, I'd really like to spend it with you.
You don't have to go.
How can I stay here with you? It's impossible.
God, you're like a riddle, you are.
Just as I think I understand you like a mist, you move away from me again.
Why would you have to go just like that? - I can't tell you.
You wouldn't understand.
- Try me.
Spend the night with me, Annie.
Just once.
No questions, no answers.
Just you and me.
One night? I can't stay here forever.
I can't stay for one night.
Gone.
Annie.
Wait.
Knock knock.
Jesus.
This this is it, isn't it? Morgan's operating, isn't he? - Very serious and very nasty.
- It has to be done.
But it's a very messy job, Sam.
Are you strong enough? Sam, help us! Stay strong.
None of this is real.
They can't feel pain, can they? None of this is real.
None of this is real.
I'm coming home.
- Stay strong.
I'm coming home.
- Not long now.
Stay strong.
None of thi None of this is real.
As of last night, this thing's gone into top gear.
Don Sykes kindly offered us the name of the Mr Big behind this robbery.
Leslie Johns.
Career blagger.
One of Britain's most wanted.
Specialises in high-risk jobs.
Lots of firepower involved.
Racks up casualties, doesn't care.
- And to top it all off, he's a cop-killer.
- Bastard.
So we need to stop him before there's any more bodies.
Now, Leslie Johns has never met Don Sykes.
So I'm going to pose as Sykes and meet him, and find out the details of this wages robbery.
Then we place officers in key positions.
That way we can nab him red-handed and stop the vicious bastard killing again.
Can I remind you that this is a ruthless armed gang led by a psychopathic cop-killer.
He's dangerous.
We need fully trained firearms officers.
I'll tool the lads up.
Without official sanction, this is illegal, Guv.
Since when has catching evil scum become illegal? You're right.
Your gaff, your rules.
You nab Johns any way you see fit.
- This my copy of "Just Jugs"? - Yeah.
What are you doing with it? There's an interview with Kingsley Amis that I really want to read.
Kingsley You know, the saddest thing is, I believe you.
Bloody hell, he looks like Andy Capp.
Undercover stake-outs and that.
This is what I signed up for.
It's not "The Famous Five", Chris.
Oh, don't spoil it, boss.
Wasting your breath, Chris.
He's never stood shoulder to shoulder with us, and he never will.
There he is.
Let's just kick him to death now.
He'll not be mourned.
Easy does it, Sergeant.
Guv's in like Flint.
Looks like we're on.
Right, the plan is the train carrying the wages will be stopped somewhere en route to the colliery.
Johns and his gang of six, including meself, strike immediately.
Wages are then transferred into Johns's van.
He then takes a hostage for security.
It's what he does.
As soon as he thinks he's in the clear, he'll top 'em.
Remember, you're dealing with a psycho.
Ray and Sam, you'll replace NUM security and ride with the wages.
Up for a bit of play-acting, Raymondo? Doddle, Guv.
It's not "Hamlet".
That's good, because "Hamlet" is a tragedy.
Trust you to know that.
Poof.
Chris and Annie, you'll be on board as train staff.
Sorry, Cartwright, but they'll be expecting a bird.
Are you sure this is the only way to nail him, Guv? Of course it is.
I don't do this for me health, you know.
I know we're dealing with a cop-killer, but I have a responsibility to this city and I will move heaven and earth to stop this man.
Now, he doesn't play by any rules.
Nor should we.
What have you got? He's planned an undercover sting to catch Leslie Johns.
He's sending in regular DCs without firearms backup.
A tape recording.
Full written report.
Thank you.
There.
I've done my bit.
When can I go home? Hang on, I need a credible officer to take the stand against Hunt.
- You'll have to bear witness.
- Look, I have done everything I can.
Now it's up to you to complete this operation and get me home.
Well, that's only half of it, Sam.
We're not only dismantling A Division, we're rebuilding it.
- That was always the plan.
- What plan? Metropolitan Accountability and Reconciliation Strategy.
Taking on corruption in the force.
We have to prove to the public that we're exorcising the cancer.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But we're not talking about boffing up a few local bobbies here.
There's a lot more at stake.
Huh? Yeah? Sorry, I don't think we're quite on the same sheet of paper.
What exactly are you saying? I know why you're really here.
So why am I really here? OK.
I'm in a coma in the future.
This is not real.
You are the surgeon who is going to bring me home.
Now that I've given you the power to destroy Gene Hunt, who is the cancer that is holding me here in this place.
You're in a coma in the future? It's a good one, in't it? Well, this explains a lot.
- It must be the crash.
- Crash? You had an accident on on the way to A Division all those months ago.
I did think about aborting the operation, but you were coping.
You'd successfully gone undercover.
Do you remember your original brief? Do you remember your real life back in Hyde? Of course not.
Because this is not real.
You have amnesia, Sam.
I'm in a coma.
Frank.
You hear voices? You hear doctors and nurses telling you to come home soon? Look, this is the real world, Sam.
But this has happened to you before.
Where are we going? I'm afraid this isn't going to be very pleasant, Sam.
Your parents died in a coach crash.
No, they didn't.
You were 12.
Remember what happened? You closed down.
Week in, week out, sitting bolt upright on your hospital bed.
Silent.
Still.
They said it was like a waking coma.
- No, I I don't.
- And then you came back.
Stronger.
Wait, wait, wait.
I don't know where you've got this from, but this is total bullshit.
Sam, you told me about what happened to you when you were a child.
We shared all of this during your appraisal.
Look, look.
I was involved in a coach crash when I was 12.
Yeah, I broke my arm.
But nobody else was hurt.
And yes, I did spend a little bit of time in hospital.
But What? Who are these people? They're your parents.
The last time I looked, my name was Tyler.
Sam, you must remember.
You are DCI Sam Williams of C Division, Hyde.
My name is Tyler! Now, I've had enough of this shit.
This is a dream and I have done what I need to do to wake up.
This is where we created your fake life for the undercover operation.
I met Vic Tyler.
Really? Where is he? - He's gone away.
- And your mum, Ruth? I don't know.
No.
No, wait, she she spoke to me.
I heard her on on on my radio.
She's in your head, Sam.
You've lost your memory and replaced it with your undercover identity.
No.
No.
You, you're in my head.
I'm being saved by some brilliant surgeon in the future somewhere.
Sam.
You have an amazing mind, but it's damaged.
Look at their graves.
They don't exist.
It's all in your head.
Sam? Sam? It's 1973.
No, this is, er this can't be.
This is not this is not real.
- No, no.
- Sam, wait! Don't ruin the operation now! Sam.
I'm so impressed, Sam, with everything that's happened.
You've done your job.
You've held it together.
You've earned their respect.
Once we're done with all this, we take control of A Division, police it progressively.
You'll be working right alongside me.
That's what you've always wanted.
What I've always wanted.
Running the city the right way.
If this is real then Gene has a life.
What's going to happen to him? He'll be pensioned off.
It'll kill him.
There must be thousands of officers like Gene Hunt out there.
Why? We only need make an example of one.
But he gets results.
You can't deny that.
Oh, he's impressive, in his way.
And so were the dinosaurs.
Hang in there, Sam, I need you.
And you can still have what you want.
You can still come home to people who appreciate you.
I need more time.
I can't think.
You can't uphold the law by breaking it.
It's what you've always said.
Gene Hunt is breaking the law.
He's a man building his own gallows.
All we're doing is handing him the wood.
We can't let him put those officers in danger.
Here.
Latest thing.
It's a mobile radio.
I'm on channel 4.
You just say the word and we can be there with armed backup to get your officers out safely.
- And then? - And then we arrest DCI Hunt for gross professional negligence and corruption.
Good luck, Sam.
You're almost home.
Right, now this is serious, OK? Going to be crossing a line here.
But whatever happens, I want you to know I'll be right in there with you.
We're going to stop this bastard from killing more innocent people.
To the Guv.
- The Guv.
- Good luck.
To the Guv.
I see a darkness in you, Sam.
Oh, you can see into me, can you, Nelson? Well, come on, then.
Am I mad? Huh? Is this real? Come on.
I just want to know the truth.
We all want that, Sam.
What's real.
What's not.
I see folk who walk about in a sunken dream, 'cause they feel nothing.
Are they alive? I wake up every morning and I tell myself I am alive.
When you can feel, then you're alive.
When you don't feel, you're not.
One word.
That's all I'm after.
Tell me I'm imagining all of this.
Tell me I'm not imagining all of you.
Moderate or good.
Moderate or rough It's only just gone six.
I didn't know you liked the shipping forecast.
Anyway, how come you left the pub so quickly last night? Will you will you will you just hold me, please? This must be what it feels like to be mad.
Tell me what's hurting you.
I can't.
You're going to leave us, aren't you? I was always going to leave you.
I mean we both wondered why I'd never fitted in around here.
Well, turns out turns out I was sent here by Morgan to gather evidence against the Guv.
- What? - You have got to believe me.
I didn't know I was betraying you.
I'm so confused.
I feel like I felt the first day I walked in here.
- Boss? - Not disturbing you two, are we? Eh? This sting is madness.
I'm stopping it.
We shouldn't be going in like this.
I don't want anybody to get hurt.
Too late.
Guv went to see Johns last night.
- He's undercover now.
- Last night? - That wasn't part of the plan.
- Got itchy feet, I suppose.
You see? This is just the type of thing that we're trying to stop.
Who's trying to stop? I'm, er I'm working in conjunction with C Division in Hyde.
- What? - I'm undercover.
Here.
You've been spying on us all along? No, I - I didn't I - All this time.
I knew it.
I bloody knew it! I'm trying to save your lives here.
I am not your enemy! Cut the crap! You've been our enemy since day one.
- This is not easy for me, you know.
- I looked up to you, Sam.
I always tried to take on board the things you said.
You've been laughing at us behind our backs with your fancy Hyde mates.
No, no.
No.
No, th this I don't know which way is up any more.
You know? I can't explain this.
You don't have to.
We get it.
Well, you can't stop the Guv's plans.
He's undercover now, risking his life for this city again.
Leslie Johns will be expecting two guards on that train, so you'll have to be there.
But I'll tell you this.
If the Guv goes down, we all go down.
Chris.
Annie.
That's why you're going away, isn't it? I bet some days you can hardly face yourself in the mirror.
All your doubts and worries.
And to think I actually felt sorry for you.
It hurts, doesn't it? That's because it's real.
Here we go.
No histrionics.
The less we say, the less chance we have of getting caught out.
Tricks of the trade.
All right, mate? Transferring wages to the colliery.
I don't know you two.
Where's your D-7? - Load up.
- Ta.
- Do you want a hand with that? - No, I can manage, thanks.
Right, load them up.
Chop-chop.
Yeah, come on.
Chop-chop.
Good work.
Shut up.
Make sure we secure Johns before he has the chance to take one of you hostage, OK? OK? The Guv says we don't nick 'em until they've got their hands on a substantial load of cash.
- How do we know when that is? - We wait for the nod.
He's in charge here.
I didn't start this.
It was Hunt.
Now, if anything goes wrong, I can radio in for armed backup.
And your Hyde mates'll ride in on their big white chargers, will they? They've thrown the signal.
This is it.
Now just be careful, OK? What's going on? This is a robbery.
Open the door! Please, don't hurt us.
Don't give us cause to.
Right, Sykes, get up there.
Start the chain.
Right, play pass the parcel! Move it! - Put your backs into it, now.
- Move it! - Faster.
Come on! - Let's keep it calm.
- Lovely.
- Come on! - Keep calm and wait for my signal.
- Come on! - What's that? - Come in - It's a police radio.
- Bloody Sykes! - You bastard.
It's a stitch-up! - Quick, take cover! Where the hell did that radio come from? - Morgan! - Morgan? Morgan! - What's going on? - He stitched us up.
He's working for them at Hyde.
They're trying to bring you down.
Bring us all down.
- Shit.
- Morgan, get us out of here.
Sam.
Tell me this isn't true.
Call me a traitor if you want, Guv, but I can get us out of the shit you dropped us in! - Morgan! - Looks like lover boy isn't coming.
It won't be enough for him.
He wants to kill us.
Sod this.
Oh, God, please, just make them stop.
Chris, it'll be all right! We're sitting ducks.
They'll keep firing until there's no train left.
It's all your fault, you Judas! Do something! OK, I will.
Where the hell are you going? - We need backup.
- You're just saving your own skin! Sam I promise you I won't leave you.
Let him go, then.
We'll cover you.
Morgan.
Morgan! Morgan.
Thank God.
I've been trying to get you on the radio.
Come on.
Let's get you out of here.
What? Where's the backup? - There is no backup, Sam.
- What do you mean, no backup? Use your head.
What better way to ruin Hunt for ever? He's responsible for a botched illegal sting and put his officers in mortal danger.
And you would let them die to prove a point? Because they are going to be killed in there! He put his men on the line.
With himself at the front! We can't leave them in there.
They're trapped in there! Somebody will hear the shooting and raise the alarm.
You've done your job, Sam, and you've done it brilliantly.
You were strong.
I knew you would be.
Come on.
Hyde is waiting.
No, I've had enough.
I don't want to be a policeman any more! Don't shoot! Chris! No We've got to help them.
Morgan! - Morgan! - Come on, you bastards! Come on.
Bastards! You've done it, Sam.
It's over.
Tyler! Sam! Help us.
One simple move and you're home.
- Home? You mean - Sam! - Get us backup! - Help us! - Come back to us.
- Tyler! Sam, darling.
Come back to us.
Sam, please come back Sam.
I'm Frank Morgan.
I'm your surgeon.
I managed to relieve the swelling, which is it's why you've woken up.
I'm afraid the tumour was too deeply embedded to be removed.
It is, however, totally benign.
It's amazing that I got you back at all.
Quite an achievement.
My name is Sam Tyler.
I had an accident and I woke up in 1973.
I had no idea if I was mad or if I was in a coma, or if I'd gone back in time.
It was like I'd woken up on a different planet.
But I knew that if I could find out the reason then I could get home.
DI Sam T DCI Sam Tyler, Greater Manchester Police.
You wanted me to deliver something to Psych Evaluation Division? Yeah, thanks.
Um You OK? Yeah.
Yeah.
There's this officer.
She's, er collecting collecting stuff from colleagues who've who've suffered trauma.
You know.
Anyway, it's good to talk about it, actually.
Thanks.
I went someplace, Mum.
And every day I woke up in that place and I told myself, "I'm alive.
" And I was.
In some ways, more than I've ever been.
You know, a a barman a barman once told me that you know when you're alive because you can feel.
And you know when you're not because you don't feel anything.
I made a promise, Mum.
I made a promise to someone who I care about very much.
Then they've got nothing to worry about.
'Cause you always keep your promises.
The question is whether we have real grounds to move for a statute on Unless you can isolate psychotic tendency and have that verified, you'll never hold a suspect for longer than 24 hours What do you feel, Sam? Sam? Sorry.
Is it unethical to move for 48-hour custodial without formal charge in violent cases that may require detailed psychoanalysis? Um Sam.
Look at your hand.
I can't feel it.
What? Er Sorry.
Excuse me.
Sam! Help us! Tyler! He's going to kill us all! No.
Now you're just showing off.
You OK? I told you I wouldn't leave you.
- Oh, lucky us.
- I'm sorry.
Sorry? Is that it? - Come here.
- Get off, I'm not a fairy.
Hey.
Nice to have you back, mon brave.
Good to see you, Nelson.
- What you having? - Scotch.
Large one.
In fact, make it a bottle.
Seeing as you're buying, boss, I'll have a port and lemon.
Boss.
That stuff I said I was angry in there.
I'll pay for the phone.
Chris.
You're going to make a good copper.
Really? That's fantastic.
What do you mean, "going to make a good copper"? Have a drink.
- I got shot because of you.
- I know.
- I'm truly sorry, Ray.
- Still I met a bird, medical bird.
Called nurses.
Big tits.
Arse like two Cox's Pippins in a bag.
- She sounds enigmatic.
- No.
She was from Barnsley.
Go and find her, then.
Who? I'm not just a sex goddess, you know, boss.
I have a pair of eyes in me head.
Go.
You OK? What? Tell me.
Tell you what, Sam? Tell me what I should do, Annie.
Stay.
Here.
Forever.
All right, then, I will.
Tyler! Put that soppy plonk down and get in! Blag on in Archer Lane.
Shots fired.
Lovely.
You two tarts, get in! And you, flash knickers.
You shouldn't be driving with that leg.
- Well, I am.
- You were shot.
So will you be if you don't get in! Move it! It's no good.
He's slipping away from us.
Sam? Sam? God, I hate that channel.
That's better.
- What are you doing, Raymondo? - Can't get the door shut.
- I should be driving.
- You drive like my Aunt Mabel.
If you injure somebody in this car, it's technically a criminal offence.
Shut up, you noncey-arsed fairy boy.
Such elegant banter.
Try and keep it under 70.
Oh, and radio in for uniform.
- I don't need Plod in the way.
- It's procedure.
You're not above the law, Guv.
What are you on about, Tyler? I am the law.
Yeah, in your dreams.