Peter Grill and the Philosopher's Time (2020) s02e08 Episode Script
Peter Grill and the Sisterly Feud
1
Come on
How about you and I make a baby together?
The sensation’s coming back!
Do it now!
At last!
Your meat missile ought to be locked,
loaded, and ready to go!
What?!
Episode 8: Peter Grill and the Sisterly Feud
Th-that’s not possible!
It’s softer than an overcooked hotdog?!
I don’t understand!
Just a minute ago, I could’ve sworn–
H-how can this be?! He looks cool as a cucumber!
It’s what I call a rapid-fire pole polishing!
I had to make a break for it.
I stalled for time until the next
bullet moved into the chamber.
RAPID FIRE
You can’t be serious
THAT’S how you neutralized my deception magic?!
My dick might be functional again,
but as long as my right hand’s intact,
you’ve got a whole lot of
post-nut clarity headed your way!
Damn you, Peter Grill!
I’ll just cast a different spell!
M-my eyes!
H-he vanished
We’re up here, Fulltalia.
B-Big Sister?!
I’m sorry, should I have knocked?
If you think you can stop me, you’re mistaken!
Too slow, birdbrain!
Oh no! She put one of those awful hexes on my stomach!
I-it tingles
My body’s getting more sensitive by the second!
Listen up, Fulltalia. Let me make this crystal clear:
This man and I are madly in love with each other!
In fact, we swore a solemn oath to
be joined in holy matrimony!
And as such,
I am FAR more suited for the position
of goodwill ambassador than you are!
Did I miss something?
Because absolutely NONE of that rings a bell
Fulltalia, dear?
Is something wrong?
I heard shouting from the other room–
Vegan? Is that you, my darling Vegan?
Grandmother
I swear I will do whatever it takes to restore
House Eldoriel to its former glory.
But until then, please take care of yourself.
Fare thee well!
Huh, that’s funny
The Elf village is s’pposed to be
around here somewhere
Lady Mimi?
I think you’re holding the map upside-down
So we’ve been walking the wrong way this whole time?
Oh, for Pete’s sake
Hey, sexy
How’s it going?
Can I get your number?
Being three thousand times more
sensitive than normal must suck.
C’mon, help a guy out!
I can’t even stand up long enough to escape!
If I were to break the curse what would you give me?
What shall I ask for in exchange?
You know the answer, don’t you, Peter Grill?
My, what a pleasant feeling.
YOU being the one to lust after ME, that is.
Hey! I don’t feel any different!
A hyperesthesia spell can only be broken by
the person who cast it in the first place.
A-are you kidding me?!
Then why draw us like we just
got through bumpin’ uglies?!
I bamboozled the great Peter Grill!
Fine!
Wh-what’s the matter with you?
I’ve got a question.
If I’m going to be your husband someday,
I wanna know everything about you.
Wh-wh-what?
Tell me, Vegan
Why were you banished from the village?
Oh, is that all?
It happened three years ago
You filthy, thieving, insufferable little shrimp!
I was saving that pudding for later, y’know!
You’re the one who ate it, aren’t you?!
So what if I did? Ya wanna fight about it?
Older sisters are ALWAYS better than younger sisters,
and I can prove it!
Bring it on! I’ll give you a taste of my corkscrew punch!
Drop dead, dumbass!
Though to be honest,
I might have felt a smidgen of guilt about the situation
So I figured I’d use forbidden magic to conjure
up some replacement pudding for her, but
Uh-oh, I can’t hold it back!
The pudding It’s spinning out of control!
The entire village was covered in pudding
and House Eldoriel went bankrupt after we
were ordered to pay the punitive damages.
And that was what became known as the
“Minestrone in the Pudding Incident.”
Wow, I had no idea
Now it all makes sense
I was gonna give her the benefit of the doubt,
but the girl’s got ZERO redeeming qualities!
Are you satisfied, future husband?
Nope, not quite!
Why did you lie about being the ambassador?!
Because I
No comment!
There are no secrets between us!
We swore our eternal love to each other, didn’t we?!
I
I didn’t want her to suffer needlessly, okay?
Carrying a child is a huge responsibility.
If there’s a chance I can take the
burden off her shoulders, then
In other words, this was her way of showing
concern for her little sister’s wellbeing
Alright, let’s head back to the mansion.
If you tell her exactly what you just told me,
I’m sure you can bury the hatchet.
Go back to the mansion and have
a heart-to-heart with Fulltalia!
World’s Strongest Man Self-Proclaimed Goodwill Ambassador
If it were that easy,
I would’ve done it a million years ago!
It won’t kill you to apologize, y’know!
Nope, nuh-uh, no way!
This is no time to throw a tantrum!
I don’t wanna!
What are you, a child?!
Look, I’m the king of apologies and excuses!
I’ll do whatever I can to help you!
Yeah, but
Trust me!
You gotta own up to your mistakes!
Fine
To what do we owe the pleasure?
I must admit,
I never thought you would return voluntarily
Er, but first
would you mind breaking the spell?
Despite my best efforts, I can’t compose myself.
My brain feels like it’s on the verge of melting!
Now we’ve both been through the wringer.
Sounds like a much more level playing field to me.
And what does that mean?
Am I supposed to entertain a discussion with
the heathen they banished from our village?!
Yup, that’s right.
Big Sister?
Alright, you got this, Vegan!
If your pride is what’s keeping you from apologizing,
then SHOW her how you feel!
I taught you all of the most effective techniques.
The sob story
The kowtow
Begging
Self-abasement
But most importantly, your facial expression!
You want to aim for an expression somewhere
between pitiful, heartbreaking, and tragic.
It’s crucial!
My expression
Do it!
I-is this a joke?
Why’s this goddamn Elf so
dead set against apologizing?!
Oh, I get it!
You’re trying to pick a fight with me!
Is that what I’m meant to assume?!
What happened?
It’s like she doesn’t realize how sorry I am.
Oh don’t worry, I think she realizes how STUPID you are!
It’s time to end this once and for all!
Agreed.
Us sisters have never needed words
to get our emotions across!
We use OUR FISTS!
VIOLENCE is the only way to settle an argument!
Mimi & Lisa
Momo Taiga
& Akira Itsuki
The party ain’t over just yet!!!
Come on
How about you and I make a baby together?
The sensation’s coming back!
Do it now!
At last!
Your meat missile ought to be locked,
loaded, and ready to go!
What?!
Episode 8: Peter Grill and the Sisterly Feud
Th-that’s not possible!
It’s softer than an overcooked hotdog?!
I don’t understand!
Just a minute ago, I could’ve sworn–
H-how can this be?! He looks cool as a cucumber!
It’s what I call a rapid-fire pole polishing!
I had to make a break for it.
I stalled for time until the next
bullet moved into the chamber.
RAPID FIRE
You can’t be serious
THAT’S how you neutralized my deception magic?!
My dick might be functional again,
but as long as my right hand’s intact,
you’ve got a whole lot of
post-nut clarity headed your way!
Damn you, Peter Grill!
I’ll just cast a different spell!
M-my eyes!
H-he vanished
We’re up here, Fulltalia.
B-Big Sister?!
I’m sorry, should I have knocked?
If you think you can stop me, you’re mistaken!
Too slow, birdbrain!
Oh no! She put one of those awful hexes on my stomach!
I-it tingles
My body’s getting more sensitive by the second!
Listen up, Fulltalia. Let me make this crystal clear:
This man and I are madly in love with each other!
In fact, we swore a solemn oath to
be joined in holy matrimony!
And as such,
I am FAR more suited for the position
of goodwill ambassador than you are!
Did I miss something?
Because absolutely NONE of that rings a bell
Fulltalia, dear?
Is something wrong?
I heard shouting from the other room–
Vegan? Is that you, my darling Vegan?
Grandmother
I swear I will do whatever it takes to restore
House Eldoriel to its former glory.
But until then, please take care of yourself.
Fare thee well!
Huh, that’s funny
The Elf village is s’pposed to be
around here somewhere
Lady Mimi?
I think you’re holding the map upside-down
So we’ve been walking the wrong way this whole time?
Oh, for Pete’s sake
Hey, sexy
How’s it going?
Can I get your number?
Being three thousand times more
sensitive than normal must suck.
C’mon, help a guy out!
I can’t even stand up long enough to escape!
If I were to break the curse what would you give me?
What shall I ask for in exchange?
You know the answer, don’t you, Peter Grill?
My, what a pleasant feeling.
YOU being the one to lust after ME, that is.
Hey! I don’t feel any different!
A hyperesthesia spell can only be broken by
the person who cast it in the first place.
A-are you kidding me?!
Then why draw us like we just
got through bumpin’ uglies?!
I bamboozled the great Peter Grill!
Fine!
Wh-what’s the matter with you?
I’ve got a question.
If I’m going to be your husband someday,
I wanna know everything about you.
Wh-wh-what?
Tell me, Vegan
Why were you banished from the village?
Oh, is that all?
It happened three years ago
You filthy, thieving, insufferable little shrimp!
I was saving that pudding for later, y’know!
You’re the one who ate it, aren’t you?!
So what if I did? Ya wanna fight about it?
Older sisters are ALWAYS better than younger sisters,
and I can prove it!
Bring it on! I’ll give you a taste of my corkscrew punch!
Drop dead, dumbass!
Though to be honest,
I might have felt a smidgen of guilt about the situation
So I figured I’d use forbidden magic to conjure
up some replacement pudding for her, but
Uh-oh, I can’t hold it back!
The pudding It’s spinning out of control!
The entire village was covered in pudding
and House Eldoriel went bankrupt after we
were ordered to pay the punitive damages.
And that was what became known as the
“Minestrone in the Pudding Incident.”
Wow, I had no idea
Now it all makes sense
I was gonna give her the benefit of the doubt,
but the girl’s got ZERO redeeming qualities!
Are you satisfied, future husband?
Nope, not quite!
Why did you lie about being the ambassador?!
Because I
No comment!
There are no secrets between us!
We swore our eternal love to each other, didn’t we?!
I
I didn’t want her to suffer needlessly, okay?
Carrying a child is a huge responsibility.
If there’s a chance I can take the
burden off her shoulders, then
In other words, this was her way of showing
concern for her little sister’s wellbeing
Alright, let’s head back to the mansion.
If you tell her exactly what you just told me,
I’m sure you can bury the hatchet.
Go back to the mansion and have
a heart-to-heart with Fulltalia!
World’s Strongest Man Self-Proclaimed Goodwill Ambassador
If it were that easy,
I would’ve done it a million years ago!
It won’t kill you to apologize, y’know!
Nope, nuh-uh, no way!
This is no time to throw a tantrum!
I don’t wanna!
What are you, a child?!
Look, I’m the king of apologies and excuses!
I’ll do whatever I can to help you!
Yeah, but
Trust me!
You gotta own up to your mistakes!
Fine
To what do we owe the pleasure?
I must admit,
I never thought you would return voluntarily
Er, but first
would you mind breaking the spell?
Despite my best efforts, I can’t compose myself.
My brain feels like it’s on the verge of melting!
Now we’ve both been through the wringer.
Sounds like a much more level playing field to me.
And what does that mean?
Am I supposed to entertain a discussion with
the heathen they banished from our village?!
Yup, that’s right.
Big Sister?
Alright, you got this, Vegan!
If your pride is what’s keeping you from apologizing,
then SHOW her how you feel!
I taught you all of the most effective techniques.
The sob story
The kowtow
Begging
Self-abasement
But most importantly, your facial expression!
You want to aim for an expression somewhere
between pitiful, heartbreaking, and tragic.
It’s crucial!
My expression
Do it!
I-is this a joke?
Why’s this goddamn Elf so
dead set against apologizing?!
Oh, I get it!
You’re trying to pick a fight with me!
Is that what I’m meant to assume?!
What happened?
It’s like she doesn’t realize how sorry I am.
Oh don’t worry, I think she realizes how STUPID you are!
It’s time to end this once and for all!
Agreed.
Us sisters have never needed words
to get our emotions across!
We use OUR FISTS!
VIOLENCE is the only way to settle an argument!
Mimi & Lisa
Momo Taiga
& Akira Itsuki
The party ain’t over just yet!!!