Rake (2010) s02e08 Episode Script
Greene
I have a family.
I'm not rolling over.
I will hit back.
(Tuts) You know, seriously, Barney, I want us to keep in touch, as friends.
We will.
Silver-plated, semiprecious stones, and an 'I love Justin Bieber' love heart.
Very nice.
I have to find a way of dealing with this particular Lane Hole.
Well, do you want me to whack this guy? No! No! Do not whack under any circumstances.
It won't happen again.
You have my absolute assurance on that.
Can I ask you not to make a big deal of this? Oh, God, God! Dad?! Cleaver Greene, we're here to arrest you on a charge of manslaughter.
Nah, I swear, mate, just shushti.
Shushti! As in, you know, shut your cave, mate! The main feature's started.
I mean, the bastard talked all the way through the coming attractions! WOMAN, ON PHONE: Are you calling because you want me to post bail? You know, Lil, your cynicism frightens me sometimes.
You're my sister.
At times of crisis, family members should be able to turn to each other.
I mean, if you and Jane wanted to discuss bail, I wouldn't be averse.
You are unbelievable! You know that Dad's estate went to that bloody conman! Yes, which is why I'm in this mess in the first place.
I was trying to do the decent thing, get your money back! We didn't ask you to get our money back! Well, who else is gonna get your money back? Can't you see that you guys posting bail for me, it's a win-win for everyone? (Phone beeps) Old mate of yours apparently, Greene.
Cleaver Greene.
Yeah.
You know, I've still got that Justin Bieber bracelet.
(Laughs) Oh, yeah.
You were part of Callum McGregor's Praetorian Guard.
Surprised you're not deputy commissioner by now.
What are you in for? They say it's perversion of the course of justice.
You've obviously been pissing in the wrong end of the pool.
Cleaver, I'm sorry about all that shit we put you through.
We were just following orders.
Right.
You're a barrister, right? You gotta be kidding me.
Cleaver, you gotta help me.
I'm a bent cop.
If I stay in here, I'm a fucking dead man! Greene, your bail's been posted.
Cleaver, please.
Ah! Please.
Justin Bieber bracelet.
Fuck, that was funny! You sure you can afford this? I've got a bestseller, Cleave, remember? About to have a second, and just so that you know, there's going to be a movie.
I'm sorry? They wanna make a movie about Josh and me.
Who's they? Ron Howard's company.
Ron Ron Howard's company? Pottsy? Richie.
He's producing and directing, yeah.
Richie is making a movie based on your life? I know.
Strange world, huh? WOMAN: Melissa! WOMAN: Cleaver! Ladies and gentlemen, I have had charges of manslaughter levelled against me.
They're charges of which I am entirely innocent.
I have no further comment to make at this stage Can you confirm reports that Scarlett Johansson will be playing you in the upcoming movie based on your book? Well, I can't confirm anything at this point, but it is true that Scarlett's one of many actresses keen to play the part.
And can you confirm Daniel Craig for Josh? That I can confirm.
And who will be playing Cleaver Greene? Uh, Judi Dench.
Well, Dame Judi Dench, I should say, will be playing the role of my barrister.
We've rethought the role a little bit.
And how honoured do you feel, Mr Greene, to be played by one of the great actresses of the modern age? As I have said, ladies and gentlemen, I have no further comment to make.
Thank you.
Thank you.
WOMAN: Did you get that? MAN: Yeah, I got it all.
Judi bloody Dench! You're kidding me.
Ron is an ardent feminist, and the thinking is it's somehow truer to the story if you were How could it be truer to the story?! She's British, she's an octogenarian, and she's a she! How is that true This is gonna be a bloody train wreck! I've always thought Ron Howard was a hack! Houston, we have a big fucking problem here.
They put me up in a hotel.
Ah.
Of course they have.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Oh, yes.
The day that just keeps on giving.
Mate, how is this my shit? I cancelled the job, and the job wasn't to kill anyone, and the anyone certainly wasn't the guy who's now dead.
You know that moron you subbed the job out to came to my place, and the cops were tailing him.
That's how they put two and two together and came up with the usual 15! If anyone should be in trouble, it's that fucktard! Don't worry about Darce, mate.
He knows the score.
He'll be sweet.
Kirsty.
How are you? You look fabulous! How great is this news about you and Col? Am I hearing wedding bells any time soon? Oh! Fuck this.
You're right.
Marriage is seriously overrated.
No! Kirsty! Cleaver, you listen to me very carefully.
Are you listening very carefully Yes, I'm listening carefully! OK, you never came to see Col about Lane Hole.
We didn't have anything to do with that old bloke, you understand me? Yes, I'll see what I can Not good enough! Arggh! Alright! OK! I'll I'll I didn't come and see Col about Lane Hole! Fuck! Good.
Alright, great.
Oh, Cleaver, one more thing.
You have 14 days to repay me in full.
I think it's about time we cleared that debt, don't you? You know my situation.
Do I look like I give a shit about your situation? 14 days.
Oh, congratulations! I'm so happy for you! Thanks, Viviana.
I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
Darling.
Mum! Oh, darling.
What a thing! Thanks for coming.
Sweetheart, of course.
It means a lot to me.
Oh, well (Mobile phone rings) Hi, Doc.
Do you know where I am? Judging by the tone of voice, a place of righteous indignation? Very close.
I am standing in the church hall where you were arrested and your son was just baptised! Now, I know you have a lot on your plate, Cleaver, what with having recently murdered a pensioner I didn't murder him, and the charge is manslaughter.
Do you know why Fuzz insisted on getting baptised? To cleanse himself of sin, Cleaver.
Your sin.
That's all he talks about now - the sins of my father! Well, he's gonna need a bloody big vat of holy water, isn't he? (Mobile phone beeps) WOMAN, ON TV: Cleaver Greene has spent his entire career making sure that society's scum are free to roam our streets and neighbourhoods.
To this end, he has successfully defended seven terrorists, countless thieves, frauds, perverts, drug dealers, and at least one cannibal.
It is a client list the criminal barrister has been heard to boast of.
The question now is has justice finally caught up with Cleaver Green himself? This is Polly Nesbitt for the Today Project.
Oh, if it isn't the first lady of the British theatre.
I'm gonna kill you.
It wasn't personal, I promise.
How can a nationally broadcast attack on someone's personality not be personal? Look, you're lucky it was me.
My EP wanted to go much harder.
Aren't we sort of seeing each other? You could've just said no.
I can't.
I'm in a tricky situation at work.
How? I had a thing with the EP's niece.
His niece.
Yeah, I was experimenting.
She was this hot and things got a little bit weird.
Oh, did they? Turns out she'd never been with a woman before, but since our thing, she's become a committed lesbian, the family's devastated.
Oh, well, I guess that makes pummelling me on national telly OK, then.
I guess it was just a lapse of memory that you happened to forget (Zip opens) .
.
that plugging Lane Hole was actually your idea I was fooling around.
Come on, no, don't touch me.
Come on.
Oh, get off me.
Are you sure? Oh, how am I gonna deal with you? Got a thousand ideas.
(High heels click) Hey, Cleave.
What the fuck? (Zip closes) Melissa has just agreed to let me do an in-depth profile on her for the show.
What - the whole two minutes? What happened with Col and Kirsty? Nothing! Who are Col and Kirsty? Oh, just a couple of gangster friends of Cleave's.
The network loves gangsters.
How can I help? You can't.
You can leave it alone, OK? Please, I beg of you.
Don't don't go near them.
They had nothing to do with anything Bullshit.
Am I misjudging the vibe in the room, or should the three of us be taking a bottle of tequila to bed? Cleave's given up three-ways, Pol.
He's worried he's not gonna be the centre of attention.
To justice! MEN: To justice! Sorry it's not French.
Got a couple of marginals up in wine country.
So, Jimmy, go on, and don't leave out a thing.
Well, it looks like a complete cock-up, Cal.
The real target seems to have been the old bloke's neighbour, a scumbag by the name of Lane Hole.
Um, I've heard of him.
ASIC's been on his case.
Ripped off Greene's old man, apparently.
Oh, right! So, a vendetta? Oooh, sounds serious.
(Laughs) No, pity it's just manslaughter.
What do you reckon he'll get? Two years.
Three at a push.
Two years?! That's fucking playtime.
What about going in for murder? Wasn't at the scene, wrong bloke got killed - be impossible to prove intent.
Manslaughter's a much safer bet.
Oh.
Bloody shame.
Yeah.
He came to your flat? You are kidding me! What sort of moron is this guy? Uh, a sub moron I think is the technical term.
Anyway, I think he's done a deal.
Who with - the cops? No, with Col and Kirsty.
If he keeps them out of it, points the finger at me, does a little quiet time, then they're gonna look after him.
Col said 'Darcy'll be sweet'.
They were his exact words.
I'm fucked, mate.
Morning! Morning.
Morning.
Mate, it's manslaughter.
It's not like murder.
They don't have to prove intent, just that you behaved recklessly.
I am aware.
I hate to say it, but you're in for a world of pain here.
I didn't mean for it to happen.
(Mobile phone beeps) It was just meant to be a warning, and I called it off, and they got the wrong fucking guy! Hey, Barn, what if it wasn't manslaughter? Sorry? What if the charge was murder? What are you talking about? Well, then they'd have their work cut out.
Like you say, they'd have to prove that I intended to kill the poor old fella.
I hate to be Mr Picky, but the charge isn't murder, it's manslaughter Doesn't have to be.
It can be changed.
You want the charge upgraded? You're insane! Listen to me, if it's manslaughter, I'm rooted, right? I reckon.
But if it's murder, I would actually be in with a shot.
Why stop at murder, Cleave? I reckon you stand an even better chance with genocide.
Captain Buzzkill.
How do you propose to get the charge upgraded? Ladies and gentlemen, ever since it was revealed I had an affair with the former premier of this state, her ex-husband, the Police Minister and Attorney-General Cal McGregor has pursued a relentless vendetta against me.
You better believe it, buddy.
He has used his enormous power as both police minister and attorney-general to harass me.
He's had me arrested on numerous occasions, all without charge, I might add, in an attempt to humiliate and intimidate me.
Oh, humiliation isn't over yet, pal.
I promise you that.
It's a pathetic attempt by a cuckold to try and reinvent himself and restore his manhood in the eyes of the community.
MAN, ON TV: You're obviously throwing some mud of your own here.
You're alleging that Cal McGregor was responsible for bringing down the former premier Claudia Marshall, his own wife.
Look, Tony, I don't think it's any mystery.
From the Premier down, everybody knows that Cal threw his own wife under the bus, metaphorically speaking, so that he could keep his own job, and I challenge you, actually, to ask the Premiere who leaked the text messages that brought down Claudia Marshall? This is why the Premiere's in Cal's pocket.
(Phone rings) Have you got any evidence at all to back up what you're saying? Uh, look, it's not really my place to produce evi (TV silences) Hello.
Uh, yes, yes, Premiere.
Yep, well I know! I Listen.
I know, but God, will you listen to me, Stevie?! Greene's all bark! The story's got no legs! You wait, mate.
He couldn't possibly wanna run with that bullshit.
I'm not making any comment on Mr Greene's guilt or innocence.
All I'm saying is he's raising some very important questions about the integrity of the justice system that is currently under Cal McGregor's watch.
I mean, let's face it - as both Police Minister and Attorney-General, the first person ever to hold both posts, I might add, he wields enormous power, and the question that needs to be asked is is he abusing that power? And I think that question ought to be asked by a Royal Commissioner.
I want Greene in a maximum security facility by morning tea, and I never want him to see the light of day again I've told you, Cal, I have told you, if we run a murder charge against Greene, there's a 98% chance he'll go free.
There's gotta be a way, mate, unless you're not happy in your role as director.
Fair go! God, you gotta have something.
You won the university medal, for Christ's sake! (Sighs) Look, there is one possibility, but, gee, whiz, there's some serious evidentiary issues.
Oh, mate, you get me the charge, I'll get you the evidence.
Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Cleaver Greene, the charge against you of manslaughter of Albert Platt has been withdrawn.
Oh, you don't say, Len.
And replaced with conspiracy to murder one Lane Hole.
Sorry, did you say 'conspiracy to murder Lane Hole'? Yes, Cleave.
Because I was expecting that it might be a charge of murder of Albert Platt? Are you sure it's Positive, Cleave.
Conspiracy to murder Lane Hole.
It says so right here.
So So, now they might be able to prove intent.
I didn't game this out particularly well, did I? So, how much could you be looking at for the conspiracy charge? Maximum's life.
So, you could end up with life instead of, what - a couple of years for manslaughter? Oh, Cleave, what were you thinking? Well, I was hoping they would charge me with the murder of the sweet old guy rather than conspiracy to murder Lane Hole.
Is that it? What? I've got fellowship.
Right.
You do realise the gravity of what I've just told you? Think so.
You might go to jail for the rest of your life because you didn't get the sort of murder charge you were after? Oh.
Yeah.
I don't want you to go to jail, Dad.
I really don't.
But there's not much I can practically do right now, and I've got fellowship.
Fuzz, you do realise we might not have a whole lot more time together.
So what? You want me to drop something I care about because you screwed up massively Fuzz! If I spend the rest of my life dealing with your screw-ups, I won't have a life left to live of my own.
Jesus.
See you, Mum.
Oh, OK.
Have fun happy-clapping! And God said to Noah There's gonna be a floody-floody God said to Noah There's gonna be a bloody-bloody Get those animals out of the muddy Arggh! Fuzz! Fuzz, Fuzz! Fuzz! Shit! Why is it you have to mock anything you don't understand? Anyone and anything who's different.
Who even slightly challenges your fucked-up world view.
You have to reduce it to a funny line.
This is why you're gonna end up sad and lonely.
(Door opens and closes) He loves you, Cleaver.
He just He wants to be able to count on you.
All of us do.
It's like you assume we could only ever want you around for a bit of colour.
But you need to understand that the people who love you need you.
So, stop being such a dickhead.
Wise up and beat this charge.
Cleaver.
Cleaver! It was just a moment.
The rush of blood, I was pissed.
I didn't mean for anybody to be killed.
The awful daring of a moment's surrender that an age of prudence can never retract.
Pius the Incontinent? TS Eliot.
Bloody Anglican, mate.
High Anglican.
We count them.
Well, whatever I intended to happen or not, a nice old bloke is dead as a result.
Our actions always have consequences.
You know that, Cleaver.
If we mortals have no way of knowing these consequences, if they can be so random that they're beyond contemplation God gives us free will so we can make our own choices.
Bullshit.
There's no choice out there.
It's just fucking chaos.
My beautiful boy took a swing at me today.
And I deserved it.
So, he's a fighter, like his dad.
How's his mum coping? A little too well, actually, from my point of view.
Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
No, no, no, it's me.
No, it's not you, Rog.
Yeah, it is.
It's not.
It's, you know, I have an ex-husband facing a murder charge.
I have an evangelical son who until recently Well, God, I hope until recently had a fetish for older women.
I just am in a very weird place at the moment.
I'm really sorry.
What? It's not you, Wendy.
So, it's true.
There is illegal gambling in Sydney after all.
Right, you and I can talk freely, Col.
We're mates.
Told you, Bump.
I'm not saying a word, mate.
I'd love to be able to tell the court that you were cooperative.
This is, after all, your 11th offence.
Judges these days, mate, they frown upon recidivists.
Changing the subject completely, have you heard the news about Cleaver Greene? Nasty business, and we're hoping that anyone with any information that can assist us with our enquiry will come forward.
Yeah.
Was a nasty business, wasn't it? Cleaver said he'd come to the end of his rope, you know.
He'd tried everything he could think of to get to Lane Hole, but nothing had worked.
Then he said, 'He's gotta die, Col.
The prick's gotta die.
' And I said, 'Nah, Cleave, that's crazy talk, mate,' you know.
Violence never solved anything.
Then he asked me if I knew anyone who could do the job for him.
'A paid assassin?' I said.
'Nah, nah, Cleave, mate, you've got to come to your senses.
' WOMAN: So, after a few months, I broke it off with Cleaver, because I'd fallen in love with somebody else.
Somebody kinder, gentler.
Somebody who understands the true meaning of love and has a deep respect for law and order.
Cleaver didn't take this very well, and not long after that, his father passed away.
It turns out that this Lane Hole fellow conned Cleaver's father out of his share portfolio, so, you know, Cleaver became quite obsessed, and I recall him expression on no less than, um, one, two Three occasions his desire to see Lane Hole murdered in ways that I couldn't possibly describe.
Quite frankly, I was terrified.
Kirsty! Kirsty! What the fuck?! Don't you know it's a crime to threaten or badger the witness? Don't you know it's a crime to commit perjury? Prove it.
OK, you know what? I'm not gonna threaten you or badger you or what was the other thing? Oh, that's right - pay you! Oh, you'll pay me, Cleaver.
One way or another, I'm gonna get my money.
Do you honestly think I give a flying fuck what you do to me now? Yeah, but you do give a flying fuck about your friend Melissa.
You two, you're very close.
From what I understand, she put up your bail.
From what I read in the papers, she can afford it.
Melissa has nothing to do with this, alright? Yeah, we'll see about that.
She might wanna make a contribution.
She's staying at the Sheraton, isn't she, sweet? (Mobile phone rings) Why do you know that? See you, Cleaver.
Oh! Lyle! How you doing? I was just thinking about you! Listen, I've got a favour I want to ask of you! Oh, fuck! Missy, it's me.
Just sweetheart, um, call me when you get this, OK? And just I'm coming to see you.
Don't leave your room, whatever you do, OK? I'll be there in a minute.
Can you call me when you get this?! Missy! Whoa! Judi Dench is the protector.
That's a microphone.
Let me just pay her the fucking money, then.
I didn't come here to ask you to pay Kirsty for me.
I came here to tell you to get on a plane.
If she's gonna have you hurt, what choice do I have? She's gonna have both of us hurt.
All the more reason to pay her! Can you not just get on a plane, please? You're gonna go anyway.
And just leave you here to be killed? Look, I think I would die a worse death if you actually paid Kirsty, alright? Cleaver.
That debt is a monument to my bad judgment and self-indulgence and I need to sort it out, and I will sort it out, and so if I have to do some time for the poor old guy's death or lose an eye to Kirsty, then so be it, OK? I would rather look at my son half-blind than as a coward, and I will not be able to live with myself if anything happens to you.
How do you think I would feel if could've saved your life for 200 grand? It's not just about you, Cleave.
Yes, it is.
I'm a narcissist.
Get on a plane.
(Mosquito whines) (Dog barks) What the hell?! Barney, I'm sorry Are you crazy? I just I had to see you! Now? Well, you haven't been answering my texts.
Nicole, listen I've left Bevan.
What? Yeah, this morning.
OK, OK, look, you might need to see someone about this, I think, 'cause what you're going through Barney, I'm pregnant.
Well, you know, that doesn't necessarily mean I'm the father, does it? The thing is, Bevan and I made this deal that we wouldn't have relations for three months before the wedding.
You know, to make the night special, so Oh, God! Oh, God I can't talk about this now.
Oh, right, I'm sorry(!) Just I had to tell you.
Yeah, I guess you did.
Have you, um Have you got somewhere to stay? Do you need money for a hotel? 'Cause I've got some cash if You don't have to worry about money.
Uh Are you alright? Barney? (Vomits) Jesus! I don't feel very well.
I need you to do me a favour.
OK.
Morning, Nicole.
Um, yes.
Red.
Barney's as sick as a dog.
He thought you could use a hand.
You're many things, Cleaver, but you're not a killer.
I call Callum Dalgleish McGregor.
Your Honour, my friend, the accused, is yet again attempting to mock this court by turning these proceedings into another of his lamentable circuses.
Every witness my friend attempts to call is a citizen of high office, whom he seeks to traduce for his own base motives.
Mr Greene, the fact that you may share a certain history with Mr McGregor has no inherit probity value whatsoever.
Your Honour, this is a witch-hunt being conducted at the behest of the Attorney-General.
Mr Greene, for the very, very last time, I do not grant leave to subpoena Mr McGregor.
We will break there.
We will resume at two o'clock.
MAN: All rise.
Why don't you call me? What? Call me.
I used to work for Cal.
I know where a couple of bodies are buried.
The judge isn't gonna let you get in the box.
What? Maybe that's not such a bad thing.
Your Honour, I call Scarlett Rachel Engels.
Your Honour, Miss Engels is not only known as a friend of the accused, she is also a disgruntled former employee of the Attorney-General with an axe to grind.
It's just another act in the same circus.
Indeed it is.
I have had dozens of conversations with Cal McGregor in which he spoke with unnerving zeal of his desire to be the author of Mr Greene's demise.
He bragged of his Cleaver unit - officers whose sole purpose was to intimidate (Phone rings) And harass Mr Greene.
Let me make this clear.
I do have an axe to grind.
(Multiple phone lines ring) Because Cal McGregor is abusing his power, and in the interests of democracy and the people of the State, he must be stopped.
Now, I am prepared to face any scrutiny from him or anyone else, but as a lawyer, I would rather answer those questions in a court of law and under oath where the penalty for perjury is severe.
How about you, Cal? (Multiple phone lines ring) Thank you.
Ah, we just have to sit tight, boys.
Once the guilty verdict's in, her words will be lining budgie cages.
I like to be watched while I'm doing it.
Well, I don't fool around with her - I mean, that would be just sick - but just having her in the room, it just helps, you know? Just in terms of my performance.
Does she have a name.
Yeah.
Ruth.
Ruth.
Yeah, Ruth.
I don't have to talk to her or anything.
It just helps if she's in the room.
Watching? Does that idea bother you? Wendy, I like you.
I like you so much, and I'd hate this to be a dealbreaker.
Every other aspect of my life, I am completely normal, almost to the point of boring.
So, could we just give it a try? Yeah.
Yeah? (Mobile phone rings) Who is it? MELISSA, ON PHONE: Kirsty, this is Melissa, Cleaver's friend.
Got the money? You know you saved yourself a lot of grief.
What about Cleaver? It's neither here nor there.
His life's over.
He gets to cross-examine you today.
(Laughs) Oh, big fucking whoopee.
He can't break me, and he knows it.
He also knows what really happened.
So? It's the story you spin in this town that counts, and I'm gonna keep spinning my story until Cleaver Greene is in jail for the rest of his life.
Why? The combination's 437.
Is it all in there? There's no money.
There's no fucking money! What the fuck is this?! Col.
You're gonna fucking die, bitch, and I'm gonna fucking bury you where no-one will ever look for you! (Mobile phone rings) Do you understand me?! Fuck! (Laughs) Oh, hello! Is this some kind of joke, Cleaver? CLEAVER, ON PHONE: Kirsty, how are you? Yeah, well, there are gonna be some serious fucking consequences.
Kirsty, if you look up to your right, you'll notice what looks like an abandoned truck.
Now, inside that truck, there's a film crew.
It's amazing what you can pick up on a long lens these day, you know.
I'm also reliably informed that there's quite a few of those teensy-weensy little cameras and microphones inside Melissa's car, and if you squint your beady little eyes, you'll notice me marching forward with Polly Nesbitt from The Today Project.
I've been under a course of strong medication for rheumatoid arthritis, and I've been suffering from Persistent and acute ski-atica.
I'm told the medication may have caused auditory hallucinations.
Along with a sense of anxiety and paranoia.
I've also recently been diagnosed with depression.
Well, as a consequence, my perception of events may be less than reliable.
And my conduct erratic, given my unpredictable mood swings.
I wish to apologise without reservation to the court For any misleading testimony I may have given regarding Mr Greene's conduct.
JUDGE: I find the witness in contempt.
Take him down.
Questions must be asked as to why these two witnesses were prepared to perjure themselves.
Was it simply for personal reasons, or were they in fact suborned to give false evidence? Is this, in fact, yet another conspiracy orchestrated by Cal McGregor? In the interests of what's left of justice in this State, the Attorney-General must face this court and explain himself.
Mr McGregor, will you be presiding after this behaviour? This is disgraceful! The public needs answers, Mr McGregor.
I made you premiere, Stevie.
Just like you made Claudia premiere, Cal.
Don't try to play the loyalty card with me.
Here's what's gonna happen next in plain English.
You're gonna ring your fuckwit uni mate at the DPP and you're gonna tell him to call you as a witness, and you are gonna answer every question Cleaver Greene puts to you with a fucking smile, and you are gonna put this thing to bed, or you're finished, Cal.
Do you understand? Let me be crystal clear about this.
I have never met Kirsty Corella or Colin Mancusi.
Never? Never, and the idea that I would suborn anyone to give false evidence is offensive and absurd.
But you could have directed others to approach them.
I could have, but I didn't.
Indeed.
Thank you, Mr McGregor.
Mr McGregor, are you aware that the charge against me was originally manslaughter? I am.
Can you tell the court how the charge came to be upgraded to one of conspiracy to commit murder? No idea.
You'd have to ask your learned friend.
Is it not the case that you used your influence to have the charge upgraded as a result of media interviews I gave which you found a little bit embarrassing? That is not the case, Mr Greene.
Because, of course, my learned friend here is also your old uni pal, and the man that you appointed Director of Public Prosecutions.
Your Honour, this is outrageous! Mr Greene, unless you have evidence of a conspiracy between the Attorney-General and the crown, I cannot allow this line of questioning to proceed.
Your Honour, it's painfully obvious.
Mr Greene, I have had enough.
I'll move on, Your Honour.
You better had.
Mr McGregor, why on earth did you break into my apartment and tell me that you'd planted cocaine there? (Laughs) That never happened.
But you'll agree, will you not, that you had me arrested on April 2 for a child abduction that never took place? Oh, I don't know what you're talking about, Mr Greene.
I see.
So, you know nothing of my arrests variously for car theft, sexual assault, desecration of a church, burning down a kindergarten.
On each of these occasions, no charges were actually pressed.
This is all pure fiction, Mr Greene.
I see, Mr McGregor.
So, let's be very clear here.
What you are saying is you never directed your police force to harass or intimidate me in any way.
That is exactly what I'm saying, Mr Greene.
You're aware, Mr McGregor, that you're under oath here? Of course.
I would never abuse my office or the trust of the people of this great State in that way.
No further questions, thank you, Your Honour.
Very well.
You may be excused, Mr McGregor.
Do you have anything else, Mr Greene, or can we proceed to closing addresses? Uh, there are one or two things, Your Honour.
What's this about? I'm a friend of Cleaver Greene's.
I'm also a barrister.
Now, I understand you're looking for some free legal assistance.
Your Honour, I call Philip Andrew Saunders.
A Justin Bieber bracelet, Constable Saunders, do you remember one of those? Uh, Your Honour, Mr Saunders is a former constable.
My apologies, Your Honour.
Former Constable Saunders, do you recall one of these bracelets? I do.
So, you recall the fact that on 21 February, were directed to come to my flat in order to intimidate me? I was.
Who actually directed you to attend my apartment that night? My watch commander.
I see, and did you further arrest me on April 2 of this year in relation to the abduction of a child? I did.
Now, where did this abduction take place? I don't know where the abduction took place.
We were just told to bring you in.
Right.
Was I charged? No.
Again, my watch commander told me to bring you in.
Thank you, former Constable Saunders.
Senior Sgt Wilson, you were the watch commander on the night in question.
Is there any record of anyone filing a complaint in this matter? No.
They why did you order my arrest? I got a call from the Deputy Commissioner's office.
Deputy Commissioner, how did you come to be involved in my arrest for child abduction? I received an order to arrest you from the Minister's office.
Did this order come from the Minister's office or the Minister himself? The Minister himself.
(Court exclaims) At last the truth emerges! That man, ladies and gentlemen, is the true criminal in this court! That man is the despot who ought to be in the dock! Order! Order! Mr Greene! I have been addicted to prescription medication for the past year.
I have relied on it heavily since the breakdown of my marriage.
I wasn't warned of the potentially profound side effects.
Be that as it may, Mr McGregor, I will be remanding you on a charge of contempt as charges of perjury are contemplated.
CLEAVER: Justice, when it is done, reflects well on us, don't you reckon? Not just the lawyers, not just court, but society as a whole, and today it reflects spectacularly well, because today we are reminded that no man is above the law, not even the chief law officer of this state.
Your Honour, in these circumstances I must once again move for dismissal.
Your Honour, whilst these is clearly an issue of potential malfeasance on the Attorney-General's part, Mr Greene has not produced a single shred of evidence that any such malfeasance took part in relation to this charge of conspiracy to murder.
Uh, Your Honour Quiet, Mr Greene! Please, go on, Mr Crown.
I would respectfully submit, Your Honour, that the Crown has clearly established both motive on Mr Greene's part, as well as a connection with his co-accused, who told this court that Mr Greene alone came to him and paid him to kill Lane Holt.
Mr Greene, do you have any tangible evidence that Mr McGregor conspired in this particular matter against you? Your Honour, I have clearly established a pattern of behaviour I didn't ask about a pattern.
Do you have actual evidence of corrupt practices on Mr McGregor's part in terms of this specific charge of conspiracy to murder? I take it by your silence that you do not.
Members of the jury, I must warn you, not to let the events of today taint what you would otherwise consider as solid evidence, and I also must direct that in contemplating your verdict, you disregard the fact that Mr McGregor was found in contempt by this court and disregard the fact that he may face charges of perjury.
You must rely on the solid evidence.
Your Honour (Door opens) Hi, mate.
Hey, Dad.
How's Tara? She's good.
God says hi.
Ah.
Well, give him my regards.
How long will it take for a verdict? Could be hours, could be days.
I've been thinking I might be ready to go back to the Bar.
But defence now.
You know what I think my problem's been? Ever since I was a kid, I had this expectation that I should be happy all the time.
But there's always gonna be unhappiness in the world.
There's always gonna be shit we cry about, shit we ought to cry about.
What business do we have wanting to be happy 100% of the time? Hmm? So, what do you reckon? That's realistic, don't you think? It was Nicole I had the affair with.
Cleaver's Nicole.
What? She's pregnant and the baby's mine.
I don't know what she's thinking of doing.
I guess this is part of the 30%.
How say you? We find the defendant, Darcy Robert Lachlan, guilty of conspiracy to murder.
We find the defendant Cleaver Greene guilty of conspiracy to murder.
(Court exclaims) Darcy Lachlan, your cooperation in this matter does you some credit.
I sentence you to ten years imprisonment with a non-parole period of six years.
Cleaver Greene, as a barrister, you have a duty to this court.
Your conduct has disgraced it and yourself.
You took the law into your own hands and now you must pay the penalty.
I sentence you to 14 years imprisonment with a non-parole period of eight years.
(Court exclaims) Such is life.
Ladies and gentlemen, as you're aware, I'm honoured to have been elected to lead the NSW Parliamentary Labor Party.
My goals are simple - to reform this once-great party and win back the trust of the people of NSW.
You alright? OK, then.
You are Lane Hole, aren't you? Good.
So, this is the end of The end of my story, story This is the end of The end of my story, story Everything is hunky-dory-dory Children of the Lord Children of the Lord.
Evening, boys.
(Lock clunks) Closed Captions by CSI
I'm not rolling over.
I will hit back.
(Tuts) You know, seriously, Barney, I want us to keep in touch, as friends.
We will.
Silver-plated, semiprecious stones, and an 'I love Justin Bieber' love heart.
Very nice.
I have to find a way of dealing with this particular Lane Hole.
Well, do you want me to whack this guy? No! No! Do not whack under any circumstances.
It won't happen again.
You have my absolute assurance on that.
Can I ask you not to make a big deal of this? Oh, God, God! Dad?! Cleaver Greene, we're here to arrest you on a charge of manslaughter.
Nah, I swear, mate, just shushti.
Shushti! As in, you know, shut your cave, mate! The main feature's started.
I mean, the bastard talked all the way through the coming attractions! WOMAN, ON PHONE: Are you calling because you want me to post bail? You know, Lil, your cynicism frightens me sometimes.
You're my sister.
At times of crisis, family members should be able to turn to each other.
I mean, if you and Jane wanted to discuss bail, I wouldn't be averse.
You are unbelievable! You know that Dad's estate went to that bloody conman! Yes, which is why I'm in this mess in the first place.
I was trying to do the decent thing, get your money back! We didn't ask you to get our money back! Well, who else is gonna get your money back? Can't you see that you guys posting bail for me, it's a win-win for everyone? (Phone beeps) Old mate of yours apparently, Greene.
Cleaver Greene.
Yeah.
You know, I've still got that Justin Bieber bracelet.
(Laughs) Oh, yeah.
You were part of Callum McGregor's Praetorian Guard.
Surprised you're not deputy commissioner by now.
What are you in for? They say it's perversion of the course of justice.
You've obviously been pissing in the wrong end of the pool.
Cleaver, I'm sorry about all that shit we put you through.
We were just following orders.
Right.
You're a barrister, right? You gotta be kidding me.
Cleaver, you gotta help me.
I'm a bent cop.
If I stay in here, I'm a fucking dead man! Greene, your bail's been posted.
Cleaver, please.
Ah! Please.
Justin Bieber bracelet.
Fuck, that was funny! You sure you can afford this? I've got a bestseller, Cleave, remember? About to have a second, and just so that you know, there's going to be a movie.
I'm sorry? They wanna make a movie about Josh and me.
Who's they? Ron Howard's company.
Ron Ron Howard's company? Pottsy? Richie.
He's producing and directing, yeah.
Richie is making a movie based on your life? I know.
Strange world, huh? WOMAN: Melissa! WOMAN: Cleaver! Ladies and gentlemen, I have had charges of manslaughter levelled against me.
They're charges of which I am entirely innocent.
I have no further comment to make at this stage Can you confirm reports that Scarlett Johansson will be playing you in the upcoming movie based on your book? Well, I can't confirm anything at this point, but it is true that Scarlett's one of many actresses keen to play the part.
And can you confirm Daniel Craig for Josh? That I can confirm.
And who will be playing Cleaver Greene? Uh, Judi Dench.
Well, Dame Judi Dench, I should say, will be playing the role of my barrister.
We've rethought the role a little bit.
And how honoured do you feel, Mr Greene, to be played by one of the great actresses of the modern age? As I have said, ladies and gentlemen, I have no further comment to make.
Thank you.
Thank you.
WOMAN: Did you get that? MAN: Yeah, I got it all.
Judi bloody Dench! You're kidding me.
Ron is an ardent feminist, and the thinking is it's somehow truer to the story if you were How could it be truer to the story?! She's British, she's an octogenarian, and she's a she! How is that true This is gonna be a bloody train wreck! I've always thought Ron Howard was a hack! Houston, we have a big fucking problem here.
They put me up in a hotel.
Ah.
Of course they have.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Oh, yes.
The day that just keeps on giving.
Mate, how is this my shit? I cancelled the job, and the job wasn't to kill anyone, and the anyone certainly wasn't the guy who's now dead.
You know that moron you subbed the job out to came to my place, and the cops were tailing him.
That's how they put two and two together and came up with the usual 15! If anyone should be in trouble, it's that fucktard! Don't worry about Darce, mate.
He knows the score.
He'll be sweet.
Kirsty.
How are you? You look fabulous! How great is this news about you and Col? Am I hearing wedding bells any time soon? Oh! Fuck this.
You're right.
Marriage is seriously overrated.
No! Kirsty! Cleaver, you listen to me very carefully.
Are you listening very carefully Yes, I'm listening carefully! OK, you never came to see Col about Lane Hole.
We didn't have anything to do with that old bloke, you understand me? Yes, I'll see what I can Not good enough! Arggh! Alright! OK! I'll I'll I didn't come and see Col about Lane Hole! Fuck! Good.
Alright, great.
Oh, Cleaver, one more thing.
You have 14 days to repay me in full.
I think it's about time we cleared that debt, don't you? You know my situation.
Do I look like I give a shit about your situation? 14 days.
Oh, congratulations! I'm so happy for you! Thanks, Viviana.
I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
Darling.
Mum! Oh, darling.
What a thing! Thanks for coming.
Sweetheart, of course.
It means a lot to me.
Oh, well (Mobile phone rings) Hi, Doc.
Do you know where I am? Judging by the tone of voice, a place of righteous indignation? Very close.
I am standing in the church hall where you were arrested and your son was just baptised! Now, I know you have a lot on your plate, Cleaver, what with having recently murdered a pensioner I didn't murder him, and the charge is manslaughter.
Do you know why Fuzz insisted on getting baptised? To cleanse himself of sin, Cleaver.
Your sin.
That's all he talks about now - the sins of my father! Well, he's gonna need a bloody big vat of holy water, isn't he? (Mobile phone beeps) WOMAN, ON TV: Cleaver Greene has spent his entire career making sure that society's scum are free to roam our streets and neighbourhoods.
To this end, he has successfully defended seven terrorists, countless thieves, frauds, perverts, drug dealers, and at least one cannibal.
It is a client list the criminal barrister has been heard to boast of.
The question now is has justice finally caught up with Cleaver Green himself? This is Polly Nesbitt for the Today Project.
Oh, if it isn't the first lady of the British theatre.
I'm gonna kill you.
It wasn't personal, I promise.
How can a nationally broadcast attack on someone's personality not be personal? Look, you're lucky it was me.
My EP wanted to go much harder.
Aren't we sort of seeing each other? You could've just said no.
I can't.
I'm in a tricky situation at work.
How? I had a thing with the EP's niece.
His niece.
Yeah, I was experimenting.
She was this hot and things got a little bit weird.
Oh, did they? Turns out she'd never been with a woman before, but since our thing, she's become a committed lesbian, the family's devastated.
Oh, well, I guess that makes pummelling me on national telly OK, then.
I guess it was just a lapse of memory that you happened to forget (Zip opens) .
.
that plugging Lane Hole was actually your idea I was fooling around.
Come on, no, don't touch me.
Come on.
Oh, get off me.
Are you sure? Oh, how am I gonna deal with you? Got a thousand ideas.
(High heels click) Hey, Cleave.
What the fuck? (Zip closes) Melissa has just agreed to let me do an in-depth profile on her for the show.
What - the whole two minutes? What happened with Col and Kirsty? Nothing! Who are Col and Kirsty? Oh, just a couple of gangster friends of Cleave's.
The network loves gangsters.
How can I help? You can't.
You can leave it alone, OK? Please, I beg of you.
Don't don't go near them.
They had nothing to do with anything Bullshit.
Am I misjudging the vibe in the room, or should the three of us be taking a bottle of tequila to bed? Cleave's given up three-ways, Pol.
He's worried he's not gonna be the centre of attention.
To justice! MEN: To justice! Sorry it's not French.
Got a couple of marginals up in wine country.
So, Jimmy, go on, and don't leave out a thing.
Well, it looks like a complete cock-up, Cal.
The real target seems to have been the old bloke's neighbour, a scumbag by the name of Lane Hole.
Um, I've heard of him.
ASIC's been on his case.
Ripped off Greene's old man, apparently.
Oh, right! So, a vendetta? Oooh, sounds serious.
(Laughs) No, pity it's just manslaughter.
What do you reckon he'll get? Two years.
Three at a push.
Two years?! That's fucking playtime.
What about going in for murder? Wasn't at the scene, wrong bloke got killed - be impossible to prove intent.
Manslaughter's a much safer bet.
Oh.
Bloody shame.
Yeah.
He came to your flat? You are kidding me! What sort of moron is this guy? Uh, a sub moron I think is the technical term.
Anyway, I think he's done a deal.
Who with - the cops? No, with Col and Kirsty.
If he keeps them out of it, points the finger at me, does a little quiet time, then they're gonna look after him.
Col said 'Darcy'll be sweet'.
They were his exact words.
I'm fucked, mate.
Morning! Morning.
Morning.
Mate, it's manslaughter.
It's not like murder.
They don't have to prove intent, just that you behaved recklessly.
I am aware.
I hate to say it, but you're in for a world of pain here.
I didn't mean for it to happen.
(Mobile phone beeps) It was just meant to be a warning, and I called it off, and they got the wrong fucking guy! Hey, Barn, what if it wasn't manslaughter? Sorry? What if the charge was murder? What are you talking about? Well, then they'd have their work cut out.
Like you say, they'd have to prove that I intended to kill the poor old fella.
I hate to be Mr Picky, but the charge isn't murder, it's manslaughter Doesn't have to be.
It can be changed.
You want the charge upgraded? You're insane! Listen to me, if it's manslaughter, I'm rooted, right? I reckon.
But if it's murder, I would actually be in with a shot.
Why stop at murder, Cleave? I reckon you stand an even better chance with genocide.
Captain Buzzkill.
How do you propose to get the charge upgraded? Ladies and gentlemen, ever since it was revealed I had an affair with the former premier of this state, her ex-husband, the Police Minister and Attorney-General Cal McGregor has pursued a relentless vendetta against me.
You better believe it, buddy.
He has used his enormous power as both police minister and attorney-general to harass me.
He's had me arrested on numerous occasions, all without charge, I might add, in an attempt to humiliate and intimidate me.
Oh, humiliation isn't over yet, pal.
I promise you that.
It's a pathetic attempt by a cuckold to try and reinvent himself and restore his manhood in the eyes of the community.
MAN, ON TV: You're obviously throwing some mud of your own here.
You're alleging that Cal McGregor was responsible for bringing down the former premier Claudia Marshall, his own wife.
Look, Tony, I don't think it's any mystery.
From the Premier down, everybody knows that Cal threw his own wife under the bus, metaphorically speaking, so that he could keep his own job, and I challenge you, actually, to ask the Premiere who leaked the text messages that brought down Claudia Marshall? This is why the Premiere's in Cal's pocket.
(Phone rings) Have you got any evidence at all to back up what you're saying? Uh, look, it's not really my place to produce evi (TV silences) Hello.
Uh, yes, yes, Premiere.
Yep, well I know! I Listen.
I know, but God, will you listen to me, Stevie?! Greene's all bark! The story's got no legs! You wait, mate.
He couldn't possibly wanna run with that bullshit.
I'm not making any comment on Mr Greene's guilt or innocence.
All I'm saying is he's raising some very important questions about the integrity of the justice system that is currently under Cal McGregor's watch.
I mean, let's face it - as both Police Minister and Attorney-General, the first person ever to hold both posts, I might add, he wields enormous power, and the question that needs to be asked is is he abusing that power? And I think that question ought to be asked by a Royal Commissioner.
I want Greene in a maximum security facility by morning tea, and I never want him to see the light of day again I've told you, Cal, I have told you, if we run a murder charge against Greene, there's a 98% chance he'll go free.
There's gotta be a way, mate, unless you're not happy in your role as director.
Fair go! God, you gotta have something.
You won the university medal, for Christ's sake! (Sighs) Look, there is one possibility, but, gee, whiz, there's some serious evidentiary issues.
Oh, mate, you get me the charge, I'll get you the evidence.
Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Bam, bam, bam, bam Cleaver Greene, the charge against you of manslaughter of Albert Platt has been withdrawn.
Oh, you don't say, Len.
And replaced with conspiracy to murder one Lane Hole.
Sorry, did you say 'conspiracy to murder Lane Hole'? Yes, Cleave.
Because I was expecting that it might be a charge of murder of Albert Platt? Are you sure it's Positive, Cleave.
Conspiracy to murder Lane Hole.
It says so right here.
So So, now they might be able to prove intent.
I didn't game this out particularly well, did I? So, how much could you be looking at for the conspiracy charge? Maximum's life.
So, you could end up with life instead of, what - a couple of years for manslaughter? Oh, Cleave, what were you thinking? Well, I was hoping they would charge me with the murder of the sweet old guy rather than conspiracy to murder Lane Hole.
Is that it? What? I've got fellowship.
Right.
You do realise the gravity of what I've just told you? Think so.
You might go to jail for the rest of your life because you didn't get the sort of murder charge you were after? Oh.
Yeah.
I don't want you to go to jail, Dad.
I really don't.
But there's not much I can practically do right now, and I've got fellowship.
Fuzz, you do realise we might not have a whole lot more time together.
So what? You want me to drop something I care about because you screwed up massively Fuzz! If I spend the rest of my life dealing with your screw-ups, I won't have a life left to live of my own.
Jesus.
See you, Mum.
Oh, OK.
Have fun happy-clapping! And God said to Noah There's gonna be a floody-floody God said to Noah There's gonna be a bloody-bloody Get those animals out of the muddy Arggh! Fuzz! Fuzz, Fuzz! Fuzz! Shit! Why is it you have to mock anything you don't understand? Anyone and anything who's different.
Who even slightly challenges your fucked-up world view.
You have to reduce it to a funny line.
This is why you're gonna end up sad and lonely.
(Door opens and closes) He loves you, Cleaver.
He just He wants to be able to count on you.
All of us do.
It's like you assume we could only ever want you around for a bit of colour.
But you need to understand that the people who love you need you.
So, stop being such a dickhead.
Wise up and beat this charge.
Cleaver.
Cleaver! It was just a moment.
The rush of blood, I was pissed.
I didn't mean for anybody to be killed.
The awful daring of a moment's surrender that an age of prudence can never retract.
Pius the Incontinent? TS Eliot.
Bloody Anglican, mate.
High Anglican.
We count them.
Well, whatever I intended to happen or not, a nice old bloke is dead as a result.
Our actions always have consequences.
You know that, Cleaver.
If we mortals have no way of knowing these consequences, if they can be so random that they're beyond contemplation God gives us free will so we can make our own choices.
Bullshit.
There's no choice out there.
It's just fucking chaos.
My beautiful boy took a swing at me today.
And I deserved it.
So, he's a fighter, like his dad.
How's his mum coping? A little too well, actually, from my point of view.
Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
No, no, no, it's me.
No, it's not you, Rog.
Yeah, it is.
It's not.
It's, you know, I have an ex-husband facing a murder charge.
I have an evangelical son who until recently Well, God, I hope until recently had a fetish for older women.
I just am in a very weird place at the moment.
I'm really sorry.
What? It's not you, Wendy.
So, it's true.
There is illegal gambling in Sydney after all.
Right, you and I can talk freely, Col.
We're mates.
Told you, Bump.
I'm not saying a word, mate.
I'd love to be able to tell the court that you were cooperative.
This is, after all, your 11th offence.
Judges these days, mate, they frown upon recidivists.
Changing the subject completely, have you heard the news about Cleaver Greene? Nasty business, and we're hoping that anyone with any information that can assist us with our enquiry will come forward.
Yeah.
Was a nasty business, wasn't it? Cleaver said he'd come to the end of his rope, you know.
He'd tried everything he could think of to get to Lane Hole, but nothing had worked.
Then he said, 'He's gotta die, Col.
The prick's gotta die.
' And I said, 'Nah, Cleave, that's crazy talk, mate,' you know.
Violence never solved anything.
Then he asked me if I knew anyone who could do the job for him.
'A paid assassin?' I said.
'Nah, nah, Cleave, mate, you've got to come to your senses.
' WOMAN: So, after a few months, I broke it off with Cleaver, because I'd fallen in love with somebody else.
Somebody kinder, gentler.
Somebody who understands the true meaning of love and has a deep respect for law and order.
Cleaver didn't take this very well, and not long after that, his father passed away.
It turns out that this Lane Hole fellow conned Cleaver's father out of his share portfolio, so, you know, Cleaver became quite obsessed, and I recall him expression on no less than, um, one, two Three occasions his desire to see Lane Hole murdered in ways that I couldn't possibly describe.
Quite frankly, I was terrified.
Kirsty! Kirsty! What the fuck?! Don't you know it's a crime to threaten or badger the witness? Don't you know it's a crime to commit perjury? Prove it.
OK, you know what? I'm not gonna threaten you or badger you or what was the other thing? Oh, that's right - pay you! Oh, you'll pay me, Cleaver.
One way or another, I'm gonna get my money.
Do you honestly think I give a flying fuck what you do to me now? Yeah, but you do give a flying fuck about your friend Melissa.
You two, you're very close.
From what I understand, she put up your bail.
From what I read in the papers, she can afford it.
Melissa has nothing to do with this, alright? Yeah, we'll see about that.
She might wanna make a contribution.
She's staying at the Sheraton, isn't she, sweet? (Mobile phone rings) Why do you know that? See you, Cleaver.
Oh! Lyle! How you doing? I was just thinking about you! Listen, I've got a favour I want to ask of you! Oh, fuck! Missy, it's me.
Just sweetheart, um, call me when you get this, OK? And just I'm coming to see you.
Don't leave your room, whatever you do, OK? I'll be there in a minute.
Can you call me when you get this?! Missy! Whoa! Judi Dench is the protector.
That's a microphone.
Let me just pay her the fucking money, then.
I didn't come here to ask you to pay Kirsty for me.
I came here to tell you to get on a plane.
If she's gonna have you hurt, what choice do I have? She's gonna have both of us hurt.
All the more reason to pay her! Can you not just get on a plane, please? You're gonna go anyway.
And just leave you here to be killed? Look, I think I would die a worse death if you actually paid Kirsty, alright? Cleaver.
That debt is a monument to my bad judgment and self-indulgence and I need to sort it out, and I will sort it out, and so if I have to do some time for the poor old guy's death or lose an eye to Kirsty, then so be it, OK? I would rather look at my son half-blind than as a coward, and I will not be able to live with myself if anything happens to you.
How do you think I would feel if could've saved your life for 200 grand? It's not just about you, Cleave.
Yes, it is.
I'm a narcissist.
Get on a plane.
(Mosquito whines) (Dog barks) What the hell?! Barney, I'm sorry Are you crazy? I just I had to see you! Now? Well, you haven't been answering my texts.
Nicole, listen I've left Bevan.
What? Yeah, this morning.
OK, OK, look, you might need to see someone about this, I think, 'cause what you're going through Barney, I'm pregnant.
Well, you know, that doesn't necessarily mean I'm the father, does it? The thing is, Bevan and I made this deal that we wouldn't have relations for three months before the wedding.
You know, to make the night special, so Oh, God! Oh, God I can't talk about this now.
Oh, right, I'm sorry(!) Just I had to tell you.
Yeah, I guess you did.
Have you, um Have you got somewhere to stay? Do you need money for a hotel? 'Cause I've got some cash if You don't have to worry about money.
Uh Are you alright? Barney? (Vomits) Jesus! I don't feel very well.
I need you to do me a favour.
OK.
Morning, Nicole.
Um, yes.
Red.
Barney's as sick as a dog.
He thought you could use a hand.
You're many things, Cleaver, but you're not a killer.
I call Callum Dalgleish McGregor.
Your Honour, my friend, the accused, is yet again attempting to mock this court by turning these proceedings into another of his lamentable circuses.
Every witness my friend attempts to call is a citizen of high office, whom he seeks to traduce for his own base motives.
Mr Greene, the fact that you may share a certain history with Mr McGregor has no inherit probity value whatsoever.
Your Honour, this is a witch-hunt being conducted at the behest of the Attorney-General.
Mr Greene, for the very, very last time, I do not grant leave to subpoena Mr McGregor.
We will break there.
We will resume at two o'clock.
MAN: All rise.
Why don't you call me? What? Call me.
I used to work for Cal.
I know where a couple of bodies are buried.
The judge isn't gonna let you get in the box.
What? Maybe that's not such a bad thing.
Your Honour, I call Scarlett Rachel Engels.
Your Honour, Miss Engels is not only known as a friend of the accused, she is also a disgruntled former employee of the Attorney-General with an axe to grind.
It's just another act in the same circus.
Indeed it is.
I have had dozens of conversations with Cal McGregor in which he spoke with unnerving zeal of his desire to be the author of Mr Greene's demise.
He bragged of his Cleaver unit - officers whose sole purpose was to intimidate (Phone rings) And harass Mr Greene.
Let me make this clear.
I do have an axe to grind.
(Multiple phone lines ring) Because Cal McGregor is abusing his power, and in the interests of democracy and the people of the State, he must be stopped.
Now, I am prepared to face any scrutiny from him or anyone else, but as a lawyer, I would rather answer those questions in a court of law and under oath where the penalty for perjury is severe.
How about you, Cal? (Multiple phone lines ring) Thank you.
Ah, we just have to sit tight, boys.
Once the guilty verdict's in, her words will be lining budgie cages.
I like to be watched while I'm doing it.
Well, I don't fool around with her - I mean, that would be just sick - but just having her in the room, it just helps, you know? Just in terms of my performance.
Does she have a name.
Yeah.
Ruth.
Ruth.
Yeah, Ruth.
I don't have to talk to her or anything.
It just helps if she's in the room.
Watching? Does that idea bother you? Wendy, I like you.
I like you so much, and I'd hate this to be a dealbreaker.
Every other aspect of my life, I am completely normal, almost to the point of boring.
So, could we just give it a try? Yeah.
Yeah? (Mobile phone rings) Who is it? MELISSA, ON PHONE: Kirsty, this is Melissa, Cleaver's friend.
Got the money? You know you saved yourself a lot of grief.
What about Cleaver? It's neither here nor there.
His life's over.
He gets to cross-examine you today.
(Laughs) Oh, big fucking whoopee.
He can't break me, and he knows it.
He also knows what really happened.
So? It's the story you spin in this town that counts, and I'm gonna keep spinning my story until Cleaver Greene is in jail for the rest of his life.
Why? The combination's 437.
Is it all in there? There's no money.
There's no fucking money! What the fuck is this?! Col.
You're gonna fucking die, bitch, and I'm gonna fucking bury you where no-one will ever look for you! (Mobile phone rings) Do you understand me?! Fuck! (Laughs) Oh, hello! Is this some kind of joke, Cleaver? CLEAVER, ON PHONE: Kirsty, how are you? Yeah, well, there are gonna be some serious fucking consequences.
Kirsty, if you look up to your right, you'll notice what looks like an abandoned truck.
Now, inside that truck, there's a film crew.
It's amazing what you can pick up on a long lens these day, you know.
I'm also reliably informed that there's quite a few of those teensy-weensy little cameras and microphones inside Melissa's car, and if you squint your beady little eyes, you'll notice me marching forward with Polly Nesbitt from The Today Project.
I've been under a course of strong medication for rheumatoid arthritis, and I've been suffering from Persistent and acute ski-atica.
I'm told the medication may have caused auditory hallucinations.
Along with a sense of anxiety and paranoia.
I've also recently been diagnosed with depression.
Well, as a consequence, my perception of events may be less than reliable.
And my conduct erratic, given my unpredictable mood swings.
I wish to apologise without reservation to the court For any misleading testimony I may have given regarding Mr Greene's conduct.
JUDGE: I find the witness in contempt.
Take him down.
Questions must be asked as to why these two witnesses were prepared to perjure themselves.
Was it simply for personal reasons, or were they in fact suborned to give false evidence? Is this, in fact, yet another conspiracy orchestrated by Cal McGregor? In the interests of what's left of justice in this State, the Attorney-General must face this court and explain himself.
Mr McGregor, will you be presiding after this behaviour? This is disgraceful! The public needs answers, Mr McGregor.
I made you premiere, Stevie.
Just like you made Claudia premiere, Cal.
Don't try to play the loyalty card with me.
Here's what's gonna happen next in plain English.
You're gonna ring your fuckwit uni mate at the DPP and you're gonna tell him to call you as a witness, and you are gonna answer every question Cleaver Greene puts to you with a fucking smile, and you are gonna put this thing to bed, or you're finished, Cal.
Do you understand? Let me be crystal clear about this.
I have never met Kirsty Corella or Colin Mancusi.
Never? Never, and the idea that I would suborn anyone to give false evidence is offensive and absurd.
But you could have directed others to approach them.
I could have, but I didn't.
Indeed.
Thank you, Mr McGregor.
Mr McGregor, are you aware that the charge against me was originally manslaughter? I am.
Can you tell the court how the charge came to be upgraded to one of conspiracy to commit murder? No idea.
You'd have to ask your learned friend.
Is it not the case that you used your influence to have the charge upgraded as a result of media interviews I gave which you found a little bit embarrassing? That is not the case, Mr Greene.
Because, of course, my learned friend here is also your old uni pal, and the man that you appointed Director of Public Prosecutions.
Your Honour, this is outrageous! Mr Greene, unless you have evidence of a conspiracy between the Attorney-General and the crown, I cannot allow this line of questioning to proceed.
Your Honour, it's painfully obvious.
Mr Greene, I have had enough.
I'll move on, Your Honour.
You better had.
Mr McGregor, why on earth did you break into my apartment and tell me that you'd planted cocaine there? (Laughs) That never happened.
But you'll agree, will you not, that you had me arrested on April 2 for a child abduction that never took place? Oh, I don't know what you're talking about, Mr Greene.
I see.
So, you know nothing of my arrests variously for car theft, sexual assault, desecration of a church, burning down a kindergarten.
On each of these occasions, no charges were actually pressed.
This is all pure fiction, Mr Greene.
I see, Mr McGregor.
So, let's be very clear here.
What you are saying is you never directed your police force to harass or intimidate me in any way.
That is exactly what I'm saying, Mr Greene.
You're aware, Mr McGregor, that you're under oath here? Of course.
I would never abuse my office or the trust of the people of this great State in that way.
No further questions, thank you, Your Honour.
Very well.
You may be excused, Mr McGregor.
Do you have anything else, Mr Greene, or can we proceed to closing addresses? Uh, there are one or two things, Your Honour.
What's this about? I'm a friend of Cleaver Greene's.
I'm also a barrister.
Now, I understand you're looking for some free legal assistance.
Your Honour, I call Philip Andrew Saunders.
A Justin Bieber bracelet, Constable Saunders, do you remember one of those? Uh, Your Honour, Mr Saunders is a former constable.
My apologies, Your Honour.
Former Constable Saunders, do you recall one of these bracelets? I do.
So, you recall the fact that on 21 February, were directed to come to my flat in order to intimidate me? I was.
Who actually directed you to attend my apartment that night? My watch commander.
I see, and did you further arrest me on April 2 of this year in relation to the abduction of a child? I did.
Now, where did this abduction take place? I don't know where the abduction took place.
We were just told to bring you in.
Right.
Was I charged? No.
Again, my watch commander told me to bring you in.
Thank you, former Constable Saunders.
Senior Sgt Wilson, you were the watch commander on the night in question.
Is there any record of anyone filing a complaint in this matter? No.
They why did you order my arrest? I got a call from the Deputy Commissioner's office.
Deputy Commissioner, how did you come to be involved in my arrest for child abduction? I received an order to arrest you from the Minister's office.
Did this order come from the Minister's office or the Minister himself? The Minister himself.
(Court exclaims) At last the truth emerges! That man, ladies and gentlemen, is the true criminal in this court! That man is the despot who ought to be in the dock! Order! Order! Mr Greene! I have been addicted to prescription medication for the past year.
I have relied on it heavily since the breakdown of my marriage.
I wasn't warned of the potentially profound side effects.
Be that as it may, Mr McGregor, I will be remanding you on a charge of contempt as charges of perjury are contemplated.
CLEAVER: Justice, when it is done, reflects well on us, don't you reckon? Not just the lawyers, not just court, but society as a whole, and today it reflects spectacularly well, because today we are reminded that no man is above the law, not even the chief law officer of this state.
Your Honour, in these circumstances I must once again move for dismissal.
Your Honour, whilst these is clearly an issue of potential malfeasance on the Attorney-General's part, Mr Greene has not produced a single shred of evidence that any such malfeasance took part in relation to this charge of conspiracy to murder.
Uh, Your Honour Quiet, Mr Greene! Please, go on, Mr Crown.
I would respectfully submit, Your Honour, that the Crown has clearly established both motive on Mr Greene's part, as well as a connection with his co-accused, who told this court that Mr Greene alone came to him and paid him to kill Lane Holt.
Mr Greene, do you have any tangible evidence that Mr McGregor conspired in this particular matter against you? Your Honour, I have clearly established a pattern of behaviour I didn't ask about a pattern.
Do you have actual evidence of corrupt practices on Mr McGregor's part in terms of this specific charge of conspiracy to murder? I take it by your silence that you do not.
Members of the jury, I must warn you, not to let the events of today taint what you would otherwise consider as solid evidence, and I also must direct that in contemplating your verdict, you disregard the fact that Mr McGregor was found in contempt by this court and disregard the fact that he may face charges of perjury.
You must rely on the solid evidence.
Your Honour (Door opens) Hi, mate.
Hey, Dad.
How's Tara? She's good.
God says hi.
Ah.
Well, give him my regards.
How long will it take for a verdict? Could be hours, could be days.
I've been thinking I might be ready to go back to the Bar.
But defence now.
You know what I think my problem's been? Ever since I was a kid, I had this expectation that I should be happy all the time.
But there's always gonna be unhappiness in the world.
There's always gonna be shit we cry about, shit we ought to cry about.
What business do we have wanting to be happy 100% of the time? Hmm? So, what do you reckon? That's realistic, don't you think? It was Nicole I had the affair with.
Cleaver's Nicole.
What? She's pregnant and the baby's mine.
I don't know what she's thinking of doing.
I guess this is part of the 30%.
How say you? We find the defendant, Darcy Robert Lachlan, guilty of conspiracy to murder.
We find the defendant Cleaver Greene guilty of conspiracy to murder.
(Court exclaims) Darcy Lachlan, your cooperation in this matter does you some credit.
I sentence you to ten years imprisonment with a non-parole period of six years.
Cleaver Greene, as a barrister, you have a duty to this court.
Your conduct has disgraced it and yourself.
You took the law into your own hands and now you must pay the penalty.
I sentence you to 14 years imprisonment with a non-parole period of eight years.
(Court exclaims) Such is life.
Ladies and gentlemen, as you're aware, I'm honoured to have been elected to lead the NSW Parliamentary Labor Party.
My goals are simple - to reform this once-great party and win back the trust of the people of NSW.
You alright? OK, then.
You are Lane Hole, aren't you? Good.
So, this is the end of The end of my story, story This is the end of The end of my story, story Everything is hunky-dory-dory Children of the Lord Children of the Lord.
Evening, boys.
(Lock clunks) Closed Captions by CSI