Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja (2012) s02e08 Episode Script

1 Go ninja! I was chosen to protect my school from the forces of evil.
I am the ninja.
I am Randy Cunningham.
Smoke bomb! Halloween, night of terror.
Evil's playground of "All-Hallow's-Ween"! Happy Hug-o-ween, everybody! Rachel's making everything "cute.
" - Halloween's supposed to be scary! - Happy Halloween, fellas! - It's Halloween, not Hug-o-ween! - You better recognize, Doug! If we don't stop Rachel's reign of "un-terror" tonight, she'll ruin Halloween forever! Howard, prepare the e-blast! "Dear Norrisville, you are cordially invited to the Brucest haunted house ever built.
In a garage.
" Send in "T" minus 10 Or you could just do without all the fanfare.
That's your call, sure.
It worked! It worked, they're coming! Oh, this is where we do it! This is where we save Halloween! Cower before the "scarage"! Is it me, or did it look scarier this morning? - This is - A wonking disaster! What we do, more skeletons? Less skeletons? - Fake blood? - We gotta go bigger! - Real blood? - Mm-mmm.
The Nomicon? We don't even know if there's a ninja power Eh, we both know there is.
"Forbidden knowledge of the shadow warrior.
" Howard was right! Why didn't I come here first! Come on! Let me in! I gotta "spookify" my garage, and fast! There's a tinty window! Just squeeze through the tiny window.
Dragon feathers, goat talons, snake fingers Hmm Uh "Halloweenja, the essence of terror.
" Ah! That's exactly what we need! The essence of terror! Oh! Hmm.
Hmm.
How do you get the terror out of this thing? Maybe twist the head.
.
Yeah! Essence of terror! Cunningham! Cunningham! - Mmm what's that? - The solution to this week's predicament.
Uh I think I'm the Halloweenja! Oh, rReally? You look like a "jerk-o-lantern.
" Would a "jerk-o-lantern" do this? Chop! Chop! Chop! Hy-ah! Yeah, pretty much.
Huh? Hurry! Funk out this freak hole! Halloweenja's on it! Hmm.
Boogity! Boogity! Boogity! You're just some straw-faced guy in a mask.
What do you know from "boogity"? Oh-ho, you got me, Mr.
McFist.
Happy Halloween to ya! Don't know what it is, Viceroy.
Nothing's scaring me tonight.
This has never happened to me before.
Boopity! Boopity! Boopity! Boo! Nothing! It's like I'm dead inside.
- Well, I tried! - I can't take much more of this.
Well, too bad! We're not going home until I'm scared stiff! That e-blast promised the Brucest haunted house ever built in a garage! Ooh! Hear that, Viceroy? Bruce has a haunted house in his garage.
This might be just what I need to blow the cobwebs off my scary bone.
- I don't wanna - We're going! Children of the night! Disciples of darkness! I give you the "Scarage"! Oh, nice work, Cunningham! Time to find out which one of you candy bars has the omens to enter.
I stared into the mouth of madness when it burped in my face! Yes! We scared 'em all! - That's how you do the 'Ween, Rachel.
- Ah! Couldn't be happier for you! Wow! It is off the freak in there.
Ah! Proved our point! Time to shut her down, Ninj.
- What are you doing? - I'm shutting it down! Ya! I don't think you are.
- I don't know how to shut it down! - Oh, geez, man! Maybe if I ditch the Halloweenja suit.
Why won't it come off? - Are you having a de-suit fail? - Quick! Nomicon me! Maybe it knows how to get me out of here.
Turn it - That was weird.
- Actually, that's weird.
I think even weirder! Ah! Ah! Ninja's turning us into monsters! Technically, that's the Halloweenja.
Yeah, hey, Bruce.
Where's my haunted house at, you? - Uh, everywhere.
- Hmm? It's like my bad dream's having a nightmare! Yeah, get a load of this guy.
Thinks it's all real! What a wuss! Halloween is gonna mutate the whole town if we don't stop him! Fake! Fake! So fake! All right, how you gonna beat this thing? Air fist? Earth attack? No! Wait, you don't have the suit! House of Forbidden Knowledge? Why do I keep going back in there? Oh! I got it! Chain sickle, then ninja ring! Oh, no! That's in the suit too! Squee! What a cute ninja costume! Very Hug-o-ween.
Oh! Oh-ho-ho! That tickles! Hugs! Maybe boom balls.
No! In the suit! We're shoobed! Totally shoobed! - Howard, I have an idea.
- Yes! Un-shoobed! But you're not gonna like it.
O-M-squee! You look so cute! - Hmm? - Mr.
and Mrs.
Ted E.
Bear! - Mmm! Double squee! - Oh! I look ridiculous in petticoats! Halloween just spreads terror, but he's powerless against cute! Maybe we can fight him with cute! - But he's got a whole army! - So do we.
Puppies! Princesses! Hug-o-weeners! Lend me your furry ears.
Outside that door, the Orange Ninja spreads terror throughout the land.
If we don't stop him, he'll make monsters of us all.
But cute monsters, right? Oh, no, Rachel.
Cute as we know it will cease to exist.
That won't happen, not on my watch.
It has a unicorn on it! Follow the unicorn! You sure this is gonna work? I've never been less sure of anything in my life.
No! The power of cute compels you! The power of cute compels you! What the juice just happened? No time! Hug first! Ask questions later! Whoa! Not one thing about this is scary.
I got no chills, no goose bumps, no heebees I don't even have jeebees.
I'm gonna try to stop him.
You keep hugging.
Oh.
I hate Hug-o-ween.
- Ya! - I feel so safe.
You pushing it, Doug! Halloweenja! Time to end this.
Jerk-o-lantern to guy-in-bear-suit.
Man, this is a weird one.
Whoa! Eh Arms short.
Fin long.
Ya! I never thought I'd say this, but happy Hug-o-ween, Rachel.
Super, adorable, hugga squee! It's over! Halloweenja! Let's not make a big thing out of this.
Just give me back the mask.
More running? Super! How do I defeat him for good? You helped me up when I was about to open the Nomicon.
Maybe Ooops! My cute of armor fell off.
Looks like I'm totally unprotected.
I am super glad that worked.
Yeah, I can't believe it.
Halloween was a total bust! Not a single Yikes! A Halloween novelty song.
- Those things wig me out! - Hmm.
Those boogies! - Stop it.
- # Those boogies! # Stop it! Stop it! Our "Scarage" is wonk again! At least we got rid of the Halloweenja, right! OK, fine.
Technically, I released him.
It's kinda my fault.
OK, it's all my fault! Fine! Where are you going? Are you really mad that you had to wear that suit? - Who are you talking to? - But, if you're then who's The crise will coming inside the house! The babysitter realized, - it was a very cranky baby! - That's it? That's your scary story? The most terrifying thing about it was how not-terrifying it was.
Come on! The baby was supposed to be asleep! But it wasn't! It was a very cranky baby! That story was "horror-able"! Babies are only scary to new parents.
- Ding! - Oh, OK.
All right.
- You want scary? - Yes.
You're telling me you want scary.
- I am.
- 'Cause I got the scariest story ever! Why didn't you start with that one? I didn't think you could handle it.
But you pushed me, OK? You did this to yourselves! - Just tell it.
- "The Curse of Mudfart"! Whoa! You can't tell that story! My cousin Sebastian said he went to a sleepover where they told that story, and no one survived.
If no one survived, how did your cousin tell you what happened? I don't know, Doug! He was pretty shaken up.
- I didn't want to press it.
- Nah, Howard's right, Howard's right.
I shouldn't tell it.
I shouldn't tell it.
It all began years ago on a Halloween night just like this.
The winner of the NHS costume competition was a kid named Jason Meyers.
No one knows what caused it the bobbing for sauerkraut, the build-your-own bean burrito station, or the chocolate-covered prunes.
One thing's for sure.
When Jason Meyers took his bow, he ripped the wettest juiciest stinker in school history! It lasted 67 seconds.
Jason Meyers was so embarrassed, he ran to the muddy shores of Lake LaRusso where he was swallowed up never to be heard from again.
From then on, he was known only as Mudfart.
Legend has it that if you say "Mudfart" 67 times on Halloween night, Mudfart himself will rise and drag you into his muddy, farty grave! - How many times did you just say it? - Uh five.
Five Mudfarts.
OK, now that's six.
That would be six now.
What if someone else says Mudfart.
Does that add to the Mudfart total? Would you shoobs stop saying it?! Has anyone ever seen Mudfart? What if you say Mudfart really quiet? What if you say Mudfart really loud? Ooh! If you say mud mud fart fart, is that the same as saying Mudfart Mudfart? Stop saying you-know-who Bad! Oh, no! What was that? Boom! Scary story! Ah.
You're welcome.
Cunningham! Where are you going? - Outhouse.
- Don't go out there.
So you want me to do it in-house? Oh, no! He's got me! You guys, you guys! It was my hand! I wish you could have seen, but it was all I'll be back.
Stay cold, OK? Hey, Randy! How bad did you scare those shoobs? - Well, I don't know.
- Come on, Randy! How bad! Tell us! Well, so bad I have to tell me about it.
Some kid gets stuck in the mud! Ga Guys? Guys? That stinking Cunningham.
I told him not to tell that story.
Mud! The mud's got me! Now the mud's got him! The honking story's coming true! Sounds to me like Mudfart's got Randy! - Zip it, Doug! - Just saying he's probably dead.
Doug! We've gotta go out there and save him.
- Because he's our friend.
- What? No! I warned him about Mudfart and Mudfart got him! I need to rub it in his face.
And the because he's our friend thing.
OK, I know we're all scared, but we have to go out there before Cunningham.
All right! Ditch the helmets! I told you helmets was a dumb idea, Doug.
Shnasty! Between my toes! I really would rather be in the cabin.
Let's branch off and leave this place.
I do more zings when I'm terrified.
Zing! But you're taking point, Doug.
- Look! - Hey, guys! Mudfart! What'd you do to Cunningham? I am Cunningham, you idiot! I think he said he destroyed him and he enjoyed it! - And he would do it again! - That shoob said that? Uh, yeah! He also said you shouldn't be so mean to Doug.
Yeah, well, he doesn't know what he's talking about.
He killed Cunningham! Get him! What to do?! Ooh, what do we have here? Who the cheese are you? Name's Jason.
Jason Meyers.
Jason M-M-M-Mudfart! Why'd you stop?! - Why'd you stop?! - 'Cause running is the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone.
Except for what happened to Randy! Should've been you, Doug! Hmm? This was Cunningham's shoe.
And now he's gone.
At least he died knowing I was right.
Would've been nice to rub in though.
Let us remember Randy the way he'd want us to.
- In the safety of our homes! - No.
Mudfart has to pay.
I want him to suffer.
I want revenge! That won't bring Randy back! Shut your wonkin' hole Doug! No! No! No, you did not make this cocoa from scratch! - What's your secret? - Cabbage.
Oh, cabbage.
I never would have guessed.
That's why it's a secret! Mmm, uh, so, where was I? Oh, yes.
I've been living in these woods for 20 years.
But the memory of that hoarded laughter still echoes in mind! Drives me to the brink of insanity! - More cabbage? Cocoa? - Oh, I shouldn't.
Cabbage makes me far too gassy.
Ah! Thought I saved it, but I didn't.
We know you're in there, Mudfart! It's them! - They've come back to laugh at me! - Hmm? Let me handle this.
Oh, I'm so glad you're alive! So I could tell you that I was right.
Mudfart's real and he killed you! Uh, but he's alive! Mudfart's not real.
Doug! You always ruin everything! No, guys, Mudfart is real.
Well, not Mudfart, but meet Jason Meyers.
Hey, you're not the boys who laughed at me.
- You're different boys! - That's right, Jason.
And we're not gonna laugh at you.
Oh, hey! Your shoelace is untied.
- Might want to take care of that.
- Uh-oh! Uh No, no, no, guys! Do not laugh at him! Come on! He's been through enough! But Mudfart Mudfarted again! Children's laughter! Nooo! Remember when Halloween wasn't so commercial? It was about fear and terror! Now it's all cheap costumes and TV specials.
Nooo! This just took a turn for the frightful! OK, guys, seriously! Stop! Why? Is he gonna fart again? Mudfart! Smoke bomb! Okay, big fella.
I think that's enough scares for one Halloween.
Ninja rings! Ninja ring, ninja ring, ninja ring! These are not working.
Look, Mudfart, I mean Jason, you don't have to do this.
That fart was 20 years ago.
But we're laughing at the fart he ripped 20 seconds ago! Doug! Hi-ya! Muddy battle fighting back, time for ninja Earth attack! One, two, three.
- Oh, boy.
- Ha! I'd de-stank you, but how do you de-stank a fart? Ninja slice! Ninja mud-buster! Ah.
It's mud stuck in the mud.
Ha! Oh! Can't get free! And the ninja was never seen again.
Jeeper, you spun a terrifying yarn, Randy.
That ones gonna stink with me.
Not getting any sleep tonight.
Zing! I have a question! How'd Mudfart pay the rent? I mean, trailers aren't free unless he was squatting, but surely, there's a law or an ordinance or Really, Doug? You just ruined Halloween! Hey, if anyone asks who ruined Halloween, tell them Doug did.
No, guys, where you going? Everyone doesn't have to leave, it's just Doug.
- It's over, Cunningham.
- Guys! Come back! OK, guys, very funny, but you can't scare me with my own story.
There's no such thing as Mudfart.
Hmm? Yeah, baby, do the ghost boogie It was a spooky night I was in a trance The zombie girls, they were ready to dance Ghost boogie Yeah, baby, do the ghost boogie Yeah, baby, do the ghost boogie I ain't afraid of no boogie Chirp.
Boogity! Boogity! Boogity! Boo!