Troppo (2022) s02e08 Episode Script

1
We'd do anything to protect our kids,
right? Absolutely anything.
The real Julian was a backstabbing,
self-serving bastard.
- We have to leave.
- We can't just leave, Mum.
[Ronnie] It's only a matter of time
before the cops work it out, too.
It should be yours.
No, Mum, I just want you.
A house.
When you come home.
What if I came with you?
- Back to Sydney.
- [sighs]
If you're not interested in someone,
have the guts to tell her to her face.
I need to be driving this.
Okay.
You want forgiveness.
It's never gonna happen.
The last three people to see Brooke alive:
Twist, Tegan from the servo and Colin.
What are you doing in my room?
[Amanda]
DNA belonging to Colin Finch.
We'll see how the lab likes this.
[dog barks]
Well, I did have a brother,
but you killed him.
- Get 'em!
- [dogs barking]
I'm starting to think
maybe Dad was right about you all along.
Gasoline.
He was gonna torch the crop.
Looks like pieces of a broken tail light.
[Amanda]
What's that smell?
The man who decided to mess
with my suppliers. One goal.
A Bichon Frisé puppy
was dropped off at a shelter
20 minutes from where
they found Claire.
Do you still have his number?
I sent it to every breeder I know
to blacklist him.
[Colin]
Colin Finch.
[grunts]
[groaning]
[grunts]
[grunts]
[groans]
Underneath
all my skin and bones ♪
Somebody take me home ♪
The lives and
electric humming drones ♪
Somebody take me home ♪
'Cause the nights are so hot ♪
My blood stays cold ♪
The days are so long ♪
I couldn't hold ♪
Myself together anymore ♪
Somebody take me
Somebody take me home ♪
Somebody take me home ♪
[groans]
[grunts]
[grunting]
Raph?
[sighs]
[grunts]
[grunts]
Oh, God damn it.
[sighs]
[grunts]
[sirens wailing]
[Lilly]
Huh. What's this?
[sirens wailing]
Mum, it's the police.
It's okay. It's okay, Lil. It's all right.
[Lilly sighs]
Lil, where did you get this bracelet?
[chuckles] It's all right, darling.
You're not in trouble.
Where did you get it?
In my drawer.
It must be a surprise from Dad.
Can I take a look at it?
[banging on door]
[Hench] Conkaffey.
Come on, open up.
[banging on door]
[Milbee Need you to open the door now,
big man, or we'll be coming through it.
- [Kelly] Is everything all right?
- It looks that way.
Mrs Conkaffey, is Ted here?
We have a warrant to search the house.
You're kidding.
I'm sorry, but we need you
to vacate while we search.
Yeah, I know the drill.
Lil, outside please.
Fine. I'll feed the crocs.
Lucky my dad's not here.
He'd kick your arse.
I take it this is Detective Crean's idea
for a little game of hide and seek.
- [Hench] Sorry.
- Go on. Knock yourselves out.
[Hench]
Go. Everywhere. Be thorough.
They got Raph.
Linda T-boned me,
dragged him from the car.
Shit! So Khalid's got him.
Yeah.
He'll want him,
to get at Twist for sure.
Okay, well, don't look at me.
I didn't tell anyone except for Twist
that he has a son.
Well, I guess the word is out.
Are you okay?
And I don't mean a Conkaffey okay.
Yeah, yeah,
I got a few bruises. [grunts]
Ted, one of the Bichon breeders called.
Later, Amanda. Come on.
Some random guy bought a puppy from her
two days before Claire was attacked.
She still had his number
it's Colin.
What?
Colin, the fuckin' journo. He's the guy.
He's the one who attacked Claire.
Well, that doesn't make any sense.
I called the number.
Colin answered.
He's the guy.
What the hell is he doing
up here in Crimson Lake?
Well, he didn't come all this way
just to write a story.
He's here for you.
What the hell would he want with me?
Go.
Go. Go.
[geese honking]
Boss, drawing a blank here.
Nothing to hide in the kitchen.
[Hench] Then do the bedroom.
Use your initiative.
If he's in there, I'll fuckin' kill him.
Hey, Lilly! Kelly!
Chill, big fella. We're just giving
your place a quick colonoscopy.
What?
Executing a warrant.
You know what that is,
you've been served plenty of 'em.
Hey, hey, hey!
We're almost done.
You people will never be done.
This was not my call.
This came from Sydney.
Your wife and daughter
are out the back.
You two, back inside.
- Kelly and Lilly okay?
- [Hench] Back it up.
Another search warrant?
That can't be a coincidence.
Should we tell them about Raph?
No, not yet.
You heard what Khalid said about police
when we found what was left of Sharon.
No, we don't want him doing anything rash.
You should be with your family.
Yeah.
Lil?
You find anything,
you call me on Lilly's phone.
We do stupid, we do it together.
Company motto right there.
Hey, kiddo. Hey, babe.
- Hey.
- Hey.
[Kelly]
You all right? What happened?
Feeling like the spare wheel, Pharrell?
You've got lamington on your face.
Watch yourself down there.
Something's going on.
Yeah. They're looking for this.
That's Claire Bingley's.
Yeah, Lilly found it in her bedroom.
Gift wrapped.
It was never recovered
after the attack, was it?
So someone's been holding onto that
the whole time.
It's Colin.
- What?
- Yeah.
Why?
Because he's the sick fuck
who attacked Claire.
This fuckin' guy.
He's gotta be behind
all this new information
the cops keep saying they have.
Maybe he tried to plant this
down in Sydney, but he couldn't get close.
Up here, he's been playing with us,
circling us.
Fuckin' with our lives.
I cooked him dinner.
I mean, he gave Lilly a ride home.
Jesus, he was in her bedroom, Ted.
We've gotta tell the police.
Tell 'em what?
That the smoking gun bracelet
that's been missing for three years
suddenly appears
out of thin air in our house?
- Okay.
- Would you buy that?
Well, then what?
What?
After these clowns leave,
I'm gonna pay Colin a little visit.
[phone chimes]
- [phone ringing]
- [geese honking]
Hench.
We have a DNA match for Brooke's killer.
Colin Finch.
What? Since when do we have his DNA?
It was an informal sample.
I'm sorry I asked.
Let's just go get a formal sample.
We need to pick him up at the motel, now.
Before he gets the travel bug.
I'm still at Conkaffey's,
on a wild goose chase.
I'll be there 15 minutes, okay?
Oi! You lot, wind it up!
- [Milbee] So it was Finch after all?
- Looks that way.
- What's going on?
- Nothing.
Come on, guys.
I was on the job for 20 years,
I know a call out when I see one.
Do you know a perp
when you see one, do you?
'Cause it looks like
your journo mate offed Brooke.
Finch? What?
[sirens wailing]
I need your car.
I know you're burning
to be the one to put him away right now.
- I'm burning to do more than that.
- I know, me too.
But if you go anywhere
near him right now,
you could blow the murder case
that could put him away forever.
Can you just not be Ted for a minute?
Let the police do their job.
[tyres screech]
- Boss, where you want us?
- You two, take the back.
- Copy that.
- Yeah.
Hench, you and me
through the front door.
- Colin Finch!
- [Milbee] Stop right there!
Finch, stop! Police!
[all grunting]
Hold him! Hold him!
[groaning] Fuck! You broke my wrist!
[Milbee] You're lucky I don't break
your fuckin' neck.
[Hench] Come on, come on, secure him.
Get him up. Pull him up.
I wanna see his face.
Prick.
[groans]
[Milbee]
Fried chicken right there.
Resisting arrest.
Better call an ambo.
Could this be
our last search warrant ever?
Might be able to clear my name.
Get what's left of my old life back.
I think it's time we got out of here.
Yeah. Yeah, I figured.
If we can find your suitcase
you could come home, too.
Home?
Well, uh
I'm a little out of practice.
[chuckles]
With what a family man does.
Oh, come on. Don't kid yourself.
You were never in practice.
Can we bring the geese, Dad?
Oh, so it's Dad now, is it?
You're always Dad, Ted.
[chuckles] Come here.
[phone ringing]
[tyres screech]
[phone ringing]
Tayla, have you heard from Raph?
[Twist]
Where are you?
I'll meet you at your office.
What do you want?
[Twist]
Take an educated guess.
That's the second time I've been
standing over one of your victims
when someone turns up
wanting answers.
I didn't kill anybody.
No, it was the dogs, right?
And with Bryce, it was a snake.
I'm starting to see a pattern here.
At least when I kill someone,
I get my hands dirty. I own it.
No, you wear it.
Like spikes.
Only they're not as sharp these days.
Now
Before you choose to use that thing,
I wanna hire you and The Hat
direct this time, no more games.
Why, so you can use the information
we get to kill someone else?
No.
So I can save my son's life.
[Khalid] Tell him to come get you.
Tell him to come get you.
This is my fault.
[shouting on phone]
I'm not asking for me.
Please, please, please. No.
- What do they want?
- A swap.
Me for him.
At Redemption Point Bridge.
Nah, there's no way
you'll let that happen.
There's gotta be
some sort of a workaround
where you come out on top, right?
You'd think so, yeah.
No, I am willing to take his place.
But it can't happen without you.
What's the catch?
No catch. Just you and Ted
get him out of there as soon as possible.
I don't trust that soccer-tragic
as far as I could kick him.
But you trust me?
You'll do the right thing.
That's your default.
Hey, you might even get
to see them kill me.
That's gotta be worth
the price of admission, right?
[chuckles] See?
Safe hands.
[grunts]
[grunts]
[sighs]
They got him. They got Colin.
[engine shuts off]
If you gotta go, go.
So it's over?
They got him.
- It's over.
- Oh, my God.
- I guess it's over.
- [laughs]
Ah. [chuckles]
Khalid wants to exchange Raph for Twist.
I can take care of it,
but it's happening right now.
I'm coming.
- I just
- [sighs]
I gotta finish what we started.
Yeah, just go.
[engine starts]
When we're done with this,
we give all the Claire Bingley evidence
to your friend.
Put the nail in Colin's coffin for good.
About time, Conkaffey.
Just so you know,
I'm not doing this for you.
As soon as Raph
reaches this side, just go.
No matter what happens, leave, okay?
Let's go!
Do you trust Khalid to play it straight?
[scoffs]
What you know
stays between us from here on.
Raph doesn't need to find out.
They might have already told him.
Raph should know who his father is.
You've got your own kid to fuck up.
How about leaving mine to me?
What if you don't come back?
You tell Raph
and I will haunt you forever.
You know what I'm capable of alive.
Imagine me a ghost.
I'm a little offended
that you don't think I can handle them.
You okay? Did they hurt you?
No, I'm fine.
You can't go over there.
What if they kill you?
I'll just kill 'em right back.
All right. Just keep moving, okay?
Keep walking.
I'm gonna get you out of here.
One of them said that you're my dad.
It's a joke, right?
Oh, come on.
You think I could spawn this masterpiece?
They're just fucking with you.
Come on.
All right, enough chitchat.
Let's move it! Let's move it!
You all right?
[Raph] Yeah.
Stay behind us.
[Twist]
I thought you were a smart guy.
Check him.
Blowing the business opportunity
of a lifetime here.
[Khalid] How long do you reckon
I'll be in business
if I don't make an example
out of you, mate?
Double your profits,
halve your risk.
Instead of buying leaf
and bark off this clown,
I'll process it for you here.
Hey, Raph! Raph!
Stop!
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Hey, stand back! Stand back!
Stay there! Stay there!
[Raph]
Let him go! Let him go!
[Amanda]
Stop, Raph!
[Raph]
Why didn't you tell me?
Put the gun away, you moron!
Raph.
[Raph]
It's true, isn't it?
- Did Julian know?
- Put the gun down, mate.
No, I'm taking him!
Let him go!
Get down!
[groans]
[Ted]
It's okay! It's okay.
All right.
[Ted]
Come on, don't shoot.
- Don't.
- No.
Get him out of here!
Let me go!
[Amanda, distorted]
Come on!
[distorted]
He's my fucking father!
Walk away! Get out of the way.
They're gonna kill him, aren't they?
You're doing remarkably well,
considering blood pressure down a bit.
Heart rate up.
Just mild shock it seems.
Is he all right?
Val says I'm lucky.
Val says you'll come back tomorrow
for a check-up.
I was all packed and ready to go.
Sweetie, I was really worried about you.
I'm sorry. I'm I'm okay.
I think Ezra is in real trouble.
I'm not sorry.
Not for him,
not after the hell he put Mum through.
He's my father.
What? What do you mean?
Ezra is my biological father.
Not Julian.
[chuckles]
Losing two dads in two weeks.
Must be a world record, eh?
A few bumps and scratches, he'll live.
What's going on there?
Your friend's in Room One.
The journo.
Turns out he killed Brooke.
Always the charming ones.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
There is only room for one
batshit crazy in this friendship.
I am not crazy.
I'm angry.
I'm angry.
You are so close.
Don't fuck it up now.
Will you quit buzzing around
like the world's most annoying bee?
I'm not gonna do anything stupid.
Ted.
I thought you two weren't
interfering with my case.
This is my case.
Long before it was yours.
How's that?
Finch attacked Claire Bingley.
He's in Crimson Lake because of Ted.
Are you sure about that?
Yeah, we have evidence.
We'll bring it in.
If this is true about Claire,
how does Brooke fit in?
She's not a kid.
We think she saw something
she shouldn't have and
I need to see him cuffed.
As in not going anywhere.
There's only one place he's going.
We found Brooke's earring
in his possession.
Once we get a formal DNA match
to the blood and skin under her nail,
he's a lock.
Give me your evidence.
I'll make sure it gets to Crean in Sydney.
[sighs]
I'm sensing a move.
Maybe back to the city?
Maybe.
Now I don't need to hide out anymore.
Is that all you've been
doing here, really?
It feels like it might be
a bit more than that.
Has been for me anyhow.
[horn honks]
[horn honks]
Yeah.
I thought you were in a rush to get home.
'D' is for drive. Let's go.
Back into something already?
What?
The brake light's broken,
in case you hadn't noticed.
Better get it fixed.
That is such a dad thing to say.
How am I supposed to notice
if the only time it does or doesn't work
is when I'm driving?
Hey, don't shoot the messenger, okay?
I'm just telling you,
your light's cracked.
Well, then it must have been like that
when I got it 'cause I
- No.
- No, no, no.
Cracked like this?
You bought this car off Mario, right?
He said it used to belong to Ronnie.
Don't tell me you've been driving me
around in the murder weapon.
God damn it.
[engine shuts off]
Smells like diesel.
Jeez.
If she's planning on torching this place,
it's gonna be
a multi-million dollar barbecue.
You're a hard woman to find.
You worked it out, didn't you?
Burning it down
isn't gonna bring Julian back.
Might have known Mario couldn't
bring himself to get rid of that ute.
Should've driven it
into the swamp or something.
Done it properly.
Well, sometimes people
they wanna get caught.
Maybe that's me.
Either way, I'm not very good at killing.
Can't get it out of my head.
We thought maybe it was an accident.
At first, I suppose.
Wrong place, wrong time.
He just came out of nowhere.
[groans]
[Ronnie]
If only he'd just shut up
I'm going to the police.
[grunts]
I've seen your drugs
out there in the forest.
I'm gonna burn it to the ground.
I saw Tayla there.
You're going to jail,
so is your daughter.
You are not dragging
my son down with you.
[engine revs]
[Julian groans]
Something inside me took over.
It's all a blur.
That's fucked up, Ron.
I'll sort him out,
you get rid of the ute.
Hey, Ronnie.
You were never here.
Stand back, if you want your eyebrows.
He said he'd take care of Julian.
But I never thought he'd do that.
[groaning]
No.
No!
[screaming]
[Julian continues screaming]
[Erin screams]
It's horrible what happened
to that young woman.
[sniffles]
Erin.
Everything I did was wrong.
I know.
I just wanted to protect my girl.
Give her a start in life.
Julian didn't know what that meant.
[sniffles]
Mum?
Where's my mum?
Mum?!
What have you done?
What the fuck's going on?!
[Sweeney]
Settle down, Tayla, and listen.
Your mum's been charged
in relation to the deaths
of Julian Naughton and Erin Aguirra.
'In relation to',
what does that mean?
She came in of her own accord.
Made a full confession.
Tayla, your mum's been charged
with attempted murder.
No. No, she wouldn't do that.
[Hench]
Step through, please.
- Thank you.
- Mum?
- Tayla, step back.
- [Sweeney] It's okay.
I was just trying to protect you.
Tell Raph I'm so sorry.
This way.
I need to go home.
Give me your car keys.
Bertha's evidence.
You can't just take her.
[scoffs] That's a bit rich
coming from you.
Don't you dare leave
without saying goodbye.
I wouldn't dream of it.
[door opens, closes]
Hey.
I'm sorry. It was Mum.
It was Mum who did it.
[sobbing]
[engine starts]
[engine shuts off]
[sighs] Looks like you won.
Beat the cops.
Solved Julian's murder.
It doesn't really feel like winning.
So I guess you'll be going back home, too.
I guess.
I've got lots of work
to do first, though,
and I type very, very slowly, so
I could have your fingers broken.
I've got contacts.
I know dangerous people.
- Hmm. You are dangerous people.
- [chuckles]
Are you sure you don't want
to come in for a drink?
I need to get back to process Ronnie.
I reckon I have about a week
before I leave.
After that, if you wanted,
you could
come visit me, maybe.
Thanks for the lift.
Tell your mate,
I need Ronnie's ute tonight.
[phone ringing]
What's going on?
Finch escaped.
What?
What the hell?
How did that happen?
We had to uncuff him to get him
into the x-ray and he
We've torn the hospital apart,
but he's gone.
He's got my pistol.
Oh, great work.
That's just fucking great.
Why didn't you give him the keys
to your car as well?
[sighs]
Are you fucking kidding me?
[engine starts]
[door opens, closes]
Hey, what's this?
You do a special family dinner?
Finally, Ted! You took forever!
We're having cake!
Ted?
Ted, you made it.
We were about to send out a search party.
Look what I found in the fridge.
Oop-oop-oop. Easy.
Easy there, cowboy.
We're about to sing
"Happy Birthday" for Lilly.
Seeing as she missed out
on Sydney, huh? [chuckles]
[grunts]
Why don't you take a seat?
You ready?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
[Colin chuckles]
Okay.
[blows]
[Colin and Kelly]
Happy birthday to you ♪
[adults]
Happy birthday to you ♪
- Happy birthday, dear Lilly ♪
- [phone buzzing]
Happy birthday to you ♪
Hey, kid.
Tell Dad the cops are having
a meltdown about Bertha.
I'm coming to get her.
- [Lilly blows]
- [Colin laughs]
Can we cut the cake?
So, Lilly, I have a present for you.
But I've hidden it in the goose house.
- What is it?
- Why don't you go find out?
Ted, the cake should really be for us.
It's nearly our anniversary.
Yeah, three years since our lives
crossed by pure chance
outside Claire Bingley's house.
So, smarty-pants,
how did you work it out?
A little white dog.
Yeah. [chuckles]
I couldn't bring myself to put it down.
It's kind of ironic
when you think about it now.
[geese honking]
Almonds, where's my present?
You better not have eaten it.
Since Claire,
we have been inextricably bound.
Me and you,
the perpetrator and the scapegoat.
Oh, no, my husband
is nothing like you.
You are so right, Kelly.
You're so right.
He's a classic, tragic hero.
A decent man,
wronged and desperately trying
to prove his innocence,
suffering for my sins.
And you're a gutless predator
who likes to stalk children. Hmm?
I think you're missing the point.
No, I got it.
You don't have the guts
to own up to what you did,
so you gotta pin it on someone else.
Well, someone has to pay, right, Ted?
And ever since I saw you with her
and phoned in your number plate,
I've enjoyed watching you suffer
while I've been free
to go on being
good old Colin Finch, journalist.
It's quite biblical
when you think about it, Ted.
You've been my proxy for the punishment.
What are you doing here, Colin?
What the fuck do you want?
Well, that's exactly what
I'm trying to tell you, Kelly,
if you'd shut the fuck up.
See, as long as you were suffering,
I had
I had stand-ins
and I didn't have to wear it.
And as long as I wasn't wearing it,
no one would see me coming.
See, Claire
[sighs] Claire was my first,
but thanks to you, partner.
- [Colin] Sit down, Ted.
- [Kelly] Okay. All right.
- Sit down.
- [Kelly] Colin.
You want us to suffer?
Look at us. We're suffering.
Yeah, but you see,
all that decency was starting
to make him look
dangerously innocent.
You and Pharrell had some wins,
and then you two looked like
you might be getting back together.
Why would you care?
Well, if the cops weren't
looking at you anymore,
they might start looking
at someone else.
I needed you convicted.
Amanda, can you help me look?
Look for what?
Colin said there's a present
in the goose house.
He did? When did he say that?
[Lilly] Just now.
He's inside with Mom and Ted.
Hey, Lil, you trust me, right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah? Come here.
I need you to do me a massive favour.
Get in. Get in.
All right. I need you
to stay in the car till I come back.
Got it? Pinky swear.
Is everything okay?
Everything's amazing.
You're amazing.
Lock the door.
- Lock the door.
- [door locks]
Good.
What are you doing here?
You could be in another state by now.
No, that door is closed.
Colin, have you thought about
just turning yourself in?
[laughs]
I'm not going to jail, Kelly.
No. No, I'm not doing that.
There's special treatment
waiting for me there, isn't there, Ted?
Yeah.
And I can't run forever.
It doesn't leave you
a whole lot of options, does it?
What would you suggest, Ted?
I mean, we're in this together, right?
We will never be in this together.
You got that?
Well, then.
Oh, I mean, I do enjoy
watching you suffer.
[screams]
[groans]
[grunting]
Go!
- [Amanda screams]
- [Colin groans]
[groans]
- [Ted] Are you okay?
- [Amanda] Hold it on.
- Where'd he get you?
- [Amanda] Hold it on.
Go, go, go! Get him! Go!
Go, go, go!
[grunting]
Where are you gonna go, Colin?
Please.
Do us all a favour.
Okay. Come on, Ted.
Come on. You know you want to, pal.
For Claire. Huh?
For Kelly.
Oh, for Lilly.
All right.
[gun cocks]
You get on your knees.
Get down.
Now.
[chuckles] You just
You don't have it in you, do you?
Huh?
Ted, you wanna give me the gun?
I'm good.
We do stupid together, remember?
Oh, come on, Ted!
Come on.
Oh, you just
You can't do it, can you?
You're still doing the right thing,
even though you know
- I will never be out of your life.
- [Ted] Shut up.
Shut up.
He has ruined enough of your life.
Maybe
Maybe I could
I could
I could start writing
to Lilly from prison.
- [groans]
- [screams]
[groaning]
You son of a bitch.
- [screams]
- [groans]
[grunting]
[Amanda] Crocs.
Colin, get out of the water.
Fucking crocs!
Colin, fucking move!
Oh, God! No! No!
[sobbing]
[groaning]
[panting]
It's over, Conkaffey.
[Ted] It's over.
- [Kelly] Is it really?
- [Ted] It's over. It's all over.
- [Ted] How you doing?
- [Kelly] I'm okay, yeah.
[Ted]
We need to get you to a doctor.
[sirens wailing]
[Amanda sighs]
[squawking]
[knocks]
- Are you stalking me?
- [chuckles]
Do I need to call the cops?
You still open for business?
What do you need a PI for?
I thought we're only handy
for insurance things,
missing pets, cheating spouses.
You've been holding on to that
all this time?
Yeah, I've got the memory
of a Loxodonta africana.
I want one of these.
I met someone recently,
and I wanna let them know
they made an indelible impression.
I don't need to warn you about tattoos.
They're forever.
Every time you look in the mirror,
you'll be reminded of them.
- Every time?
- Every time.
It's a huge commitment.
Yeah, I'm okay with that.
All right.
Well, what reminds you of this person?
Not sure.
Oh, maybe a bat.
She's batshit crazy.
Or a shark.
She thinks she's an apex predator.
She sounds amazing.
She's full of herself.
And the worst holiday fling
I've ever had.
But I won't forget her.
Don't want to.
Well, let me see what I can do.
Sounds dangerous.
How do I know I can trust you?
Well, that's the point, isn't it?
[tattoo gun buzzing]
[laughs]
[tattoo gun buzzing]
[Sweeney]
It's beautiful.
What do the numbers mean?
Latitude and longitude
for Crimson Lake.
So you can always
find your way back here.
In fairer seas.
All right. Say
Say 'crime scene'.
Crime scene. [chuckles]
[camera shutter clicks]
Better watch out.
I know where to find you.
You on a health kick these days?
They're for Ted's geese.
I still can't find anyone
who wants 'em.
Oh, I've got plenty of takers.
As pets, Barb.
Not Sunday lunch.
Hey, you two were in the city paper again.
I saved you a copy.
Recycle it.
It's better for the environment.
- [grunts]
- [geese honking]
All right, you lot, special treat.
This shit's gourmet.
He was boring, seriously bogged down
and a real grump.
He never would have bought you lettuce.
[Ted]
You're goddamn right.
You spoil 'em,
they start taking liberties.
What are you doing here?
Did you forget something?
Now I know who not to call
to do my eulogy.
Did you fuck it up?
I told you if you fucked it up,
I would never speak to you again.
What about Lil?
You know, she really loved it up here.
[grunts] She's still coming up to visit.
You literally spent the entire year
trying to get back to Sydney.
How could you give up after one month?
I guess that place
I was trying to get back to
just wasn't there anymore.
I hate to say it,
but I feel more home up here
with you misfits and crazies.
Yeah, I'm not sure
if we can make room for one more.
I have to check the guest list.
Just can't not be Ted.
Apparently, you're the only person
on the planet who can put up with me.
[beer can opens]
Yeah, don't push your luck, Conkaffey.
What are you doing?
I'm hugging you.
It's what people do, isn't it?
No.
- No?
- No, I don't do hugs.
I don't do touching.
And I don't like people
touching my shit.
You got that?
Give me a beer, smartass.
All right. Just this once.
Come on, geese.
Let's get you back in the house
where you belong.
Oh, now who's spoiling them?
[Ted] They're my geese.
They do what I want.
[Amanda] I've been babysitting
those geese for a month, mate.
[Ted] I'm pretty sure they're sick of you
blabbering at 'em all the time.
[instrumental music playing]