Bump (2021) s02e09 Episode Script

1
DOM: You're a Zen master
and I'm in awe of you.
I'm a Zen master. You're in awe of me.
You're a calming ocean breeze.
I'm a calming ocean breeze.
Even when bigoted old men
say shit just to get a rise
- A Zen master.
- I'm a Zen master.
- And I'm in awe of you.
- And I'm
a coward.
Maybe I'm just a coward.
Guys, her brain is a sponge.
We don't know what she might absorb.
Now's not the time
to doubt yourself, OK?
I'm a Zen master.
You're in awe of me. I'm a Zen master.
(WHISPERS) I'm a Zen
master, I'm a Zen master.
I'm a Zen master.
You're in awe of me.
(HORN TOOTS)
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
(THEATRICALLY) Hi!
What ever happened to
service in this country?
- We did offer to pick you up.
- Oh, no, no.
The more I spend now
the less she gets later.
Oh! Someone's been in a good paddock.
Hi, Bruce.
(STIRRING MUSIC)
No, no. I'll I'll get it, shall I?
Hi, Grandad.
(BABY GURGLES)
What's wrong with it?
(WHISPERS) I'm sorry.
(MUTTERS) At least it wasn't racist.
- ANGIE: Do you want a tea?
- BRUCE: Mmm.
You think you'll miss
living in Singapore?
BRUCE: I'll miss the work ethic.
- (MUTTERS) Having a maid.
- (CHUCKLES)
BRUCE: Oh, have you got any oat milk?
We've got soy.
Oestrogen milk?
I don't think so.
Explains quite a bit, though.
Oh, it's true what they say
about airlines doping you
through the air conditioning system.
Give a holler
when Bowie comes in.
No offence, but how
did he get four wives?
Four ex-wives.
- Huh!
- Come on!
Coming.
(CHUCKLES)
Where is he?
Did somebody say tickle time?!
That's right, tickle time!
(CURIOUS MUSIC)
(MEDICAL MONITOR BEEPS, THEN FLATLINES)
(SHOUTS) Mum!
SANTI: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Ita, stop.
Para, para. No, no, no.
BERNARDITA: Angie's father died!
That's Oly's grandfather.
- Sorpresa's great-grandfather.
- I know, I understand.
I think it's just better if we
don't make a big deal of it, OK?
That's not right.
Imagine dying in Australia!
- Shh!
- I'm not dying here.
I know it's difficult for
you guys to understand,
but Oly didn't really know her abuelo.
What about us? Are we supposed
to pretend nobody died?
Hola!
Hey, how are ya?
SANTI: Hey.
- Jacinda's there for you.
- Yeah.
We're sorry to hear
about your father-in-law.
Oh, it's it occurred, so
You must be so sad.
Uh
And hungry.
Well, I wouldn't
want want to be rude.
Um, thank you.
Ahh!
Mmm!
Mmm.
Thank you.
How are the funeral arrangements?
Oh, we're not gonna go too overboard.
I can help you if you need.
I was just promoted to event manager.
By whom?
By the creative director
of Rosa Hernandez, mi vida!
Well, congratulations.
Uh, but doing this for Ange
is the least I can do for her.
Ay, Dom.
I help you, you help me.
You can tell me how you made your app.
I have my own idea!
- Oh, really?
- Yeah!
Oh, well, thanks.
It might be nice to send
him off with some fanfare.
Whoever killed him has
to open his suitcases.
Oly!
He died in my bed.
What if it's full of, like, weird stuff?
Oly.
What? We didn't really
know him very well.
(SIGHS) Yeah, no, he
He was just a man who loved leisurewear.
What am I gonna do with all this stuff?
You might find something in
there that you wanna keep.
But we can do it another
day if you prefer.
No, let's do it now.
(SIGHS)
(WHISPERS) "Christine."
(MYSTICAL MUSIC)
Hmm.
Our psycho grandma who
hasn't visited J yet.
BOWIE: Not Christine.
We'll just post it to her.
- Yeah.
- I
I think we should make sure she gets it.
Like actually gets it.
Well, I'll get the sedatives, then.
Oh, don't be silly.
I'm a calm ocean breeze, remember?
- (INTENSE MUSIC)
- (WOMAN VOCALISES WORDLESSLY)
(CALLS) Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
(WIND CHIMES CLANG)
(SIGHS)
(WOMAN CALLS) Hello?
ANGIE: Hi!
Oh, hi, darling!
I'm outside.
(SIGHS)
So, um
Dad
died.
I know.
How?
I felt him passing.
Oh, what?
Your little pills haven't
kicked in yet, have they?
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
You're really funny, Mum.
I didn't I'm not
I'm fine.
And, uh, J and Ol are doing really well.
When she's ready to receive me,
I'll know,
and I'll be ready to receive her.
Mmm. Well, take your time.
Oh, darling.
Haven't you resolved
your pelvic tension?
Do you wanna take this?
ANGIE: Yep. (SIGHS)
(ANGIE GROANS)
Yep, I'd love a cup of tea.
OK.
Usually you want lilies
or roses for the casket.
Something tasteful, something luxurious.
You know what? I think, um
less is more in this instance.
It's not gonna be a big affair.
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to say 'affair'.
You don't have an opinion?
Not about your private
life, no. No judgement here.
I mean about the flowers.
Oh! Well, no.
Uh, well, yeah, but
'Tasteful' and 'luxurious'
aren't adjectives
I'd use to describe Bruce.
And how would you describe Bruce?
He was a male person.
(MUTTERS) Oh, my God.
OK, so we'll see what's white and cheap.
Well, that's in the ball park, yeah.
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
(OLY SPEAKS FRENCH)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(SPEAKS FRENCH)
Oly, I have no idea what you're saying.
Go back. Keep going, keep going.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(SULTRY MUSIC)
- (SANTI SIGHS)
- (MUSIC PLAYS SOFTLY)
OLY: Just to clarify,
I know that banning missiles
would be an unrealistic request
without some sort of
reciprocal arms agreement
separate to any trade terms,
but I got carried away.
It's all good. I wasn't
too worried about it.
What's your fantasy?
- Huh?
- Your sexual fantasy.
I'm guessing it's not UN-related.
Um
You don't wanna tell me?
No, I just literally don't have one.
You don't have a sexual fantasy?
Nope.
OK, um
I could put on a high-vis vest.
(AMERICAN ACCENT) Mornin', ma'am.
I've come to fix your pipes.
Nah, but, like, for real.
What if I was a tradie?
Your sexual fantasy is
to be a maintenance man?
Nah, like
like, in real life, like
Like, what if I was a tradie as my job?
OLY: Mmm.
I mean, if you need another
part-time job, that would be
very sexy.
It would probably
It would probably be more like a
like a full-time thing.
Like, instead of school.
(SONG ENDS)
What?
I mean, I don't need an ATAR
for what I wanna do, and
Wait, wait, wait. You
wouldn't get your HSC?
I'm not gonna make
any money doing my HSC.
But
You're thinking about
dropping out of school?
Yeah.
Is that a problem?
(MUTTERS) Oh, my God.
(GROANS)
Oh, I am having the most
delicious affair right now!
Well, you're obviously
Oh, no, I'm pretty happy
with my lot at the moment.
Thanks for enquiring.
I should say I'm surprised,
but I did predict that you
and Dom would stay together.
There's something very
non-confrontational
about the two of you.
Or, dare I say, co-dependent?
(LAUGHS)
What?
Must be the 5G interfering
with your intuition.
Oh, yes?
Well, if you must know,
we um, we broke up.
"Broke up"?
Well, that doesn't sound like
the mature resolution of
a 20-odd-year marriage.
We weren't married.
Oh, darling, I am sorry.
I didn't realise you
regretted the decision.
Don't you wanna know
what's in the letter?
No, but I could use a
hand with the compost.
- (FLIES BUZZ)
- (ANGIE SIGHS)
Oh, this is ripe.
Of course.
I go in the bucket, return
it to the earth via this heap.
Am I turning your poo?
Or do you call it
'nightsoil' in your world?
It's shit, Angela.
I call it shit.
You've lived in the city too long.
Yeah, that's right, Mum.
There's no shit in the Inner West.
Yes, but it's so easy to
distract yourself from the shit.
There's all that stuff buzzing around.
There's no acceptance of reality.
There's no peace.
Yeah, well,
maybe you've got peace by avoiding life.
Thank you, Virginia Woolf.
THIS is life.
And she can't exactly talk.
You get to choose which one you want.
No, just tell me which ones are good.
Oh. OK.
You reckon people will be able to tell
that we got Bruce a cheap coffin?
Don't worry. We're gonna
decorate it with the flowers.
It's gonna be great.
Mmm, how many people will be speaking?
Uh, I'm thinking it's just Angie.
Why do I get the feeling that
this man is not celebrated?
He wasn't particularly, um
He was kind of a
An asshole?
You should have told me earlier.
Ever since I met him, 25 years ago,
I've been wanting to punch him
every day since.
Like, if his casket was an open casket,
I'd consider punching his corpse.
Amazing that Angie can even function
with those two as parents.
What will Angie say at the eulogy?
What do you say about
someone who's died?
"I'm broken forever. I
I wish it was me that died instead.
My joy is buried with them."
Well, I I don't think that's
applicable in this case.
It's what Matias said
about his first wife.
I found the eulogy in a box of papers
when we bought the food truck.
Wow.
I'm sorry.
Tell me about your app idea.
Yes. My app.
I thought about this app
that will organise all the
food trucks in the area.
And they get booked,
I get commission.
So you'll be, like,
queen of the food trucks?
- (BOTH LAUGH)
- I hope so. I like that.
Yeah, it's a good idea!
Thanks.
Do you think it's
possible to start again?
Are your father's funeral instructions
as gauche as I think they would be?
Why? Do you wanna come?
Is that what you want?
I only came
to give you this.
(FIRE CRACKLES)
Oh. Now, now, Angela. Be like a tree.
Let the dead leaves fall. Let them drop.
"Dear Christine
"I've been trying to calculate
how many days it's been
since we've seen each other."
No.
"But I couldn't quite be accurate."
"You were always the mathematician."
Angela!
Stop!
You don't have to do this.
This is his work, not yours.
You are not responsible
for what he did.
You're not responsible for what I do.
Sometimes I feel quite
strongly that I was wrong
to pull you out of my
body with my own hands.
Did that make you too reliant on me?
It's possible.
But do I dwell on it?
No.
I let it drop.
I just need to go to the bucket.
(SIGHS)
(MOTOR SPUTTERS NEARBY)
(MOTOR STARTS)
Mum?
(SCREAMS) Get back here!
Get back here right now!
(PHONE RINGS)
How'd you go?
I didn't go.
I am watching her go.
I am watching a grown woman
run away from me in a tinnie.
She is fucked.
Don't say that.
Oh, who does that to someone?
I can come and get you if you want.
Oh, I don't know.
No, I can come right
now and and get you.
No, it's OK.
(SIGHS) I don't mind.
No, it's OK. It's just just shock.
I should have known.
I'm sorry, Ange.
(TURTLE CHIRPS)
Yeah, I'm sorry too, Dom.
You know what I mean?
You know what I meant.
Yeah. Yeah.
OK, I'm gonna go. I'm
gonna get the ferry.
I'll speak to you later.
- Well, I lo
- (LINE BEEPS)
(TURTLE CHIRPS)
(PEACEFUL MUSIC)
SANTI: Like, why are we even doing this?
- (THUD!)
- SANTI: Ow!
- OLY: Ow!
- Are you OK?
Do you really not want
me to leave school?
(SIGHS) No, I didn't say that.
- Would you be embarrassed?
- No. Why would I be embarrassed?
Because you haven't fully told me
what you think about the idea.
Just like you haven't told
me your sexual fantasy.
I mean, for all I know,
your leaving school
could just be an elaborate excuse
not to tell me your fantasy
It's two chicks.
My fantasy is two chicks and
they do it in front of me.
Do you have a second fantasy?
Do you really not want
me to leave school?
(SIGHS)
Of course I don't want
you to leave school.
But not because of why you think.
Thanks a lot for thinking
that I'm a massive snob.
Anyway, it's scary.
The statistics on school
leavers isn't very reassuring.
Well, aren't I reassuring?
And you know Paul Keating
left school when he was 14
and became the prime
minister of the country.
Oh!
Is that right, Mr Research?
If we're not at school together, then
we might drift apart.
Yeah, but Oly, it's
only for a little bit.
And then we can afford our own place
and we'll be together all the time.
You're really serious.
You've thought a lot about this.
Does that mean you
already have some high-vis?
(GATE SQUEAKS)
(SIGHS)
- (DOM SNIFFS) Ange!
- Oh, God!
Please. You don't need to call me that.
(LAUGHS) What are you doing,
skulking out here in the dark?
Oh, I wanted to see how you were.
It seemed less weird than
waiting inside without you.
Ohh. It's your house too.
DOM: I guess.
You OK?
(GROANS)
I don't know.
(SIGHS)
What's the matter?
Oh, just a bit tired.
I'm gonna go to bed.
Need anything?
No.
No, no.
Thanks, Dom.
'Night.
What do you think?
I think I just sprung my parents.
You really don't wanna
fuck a tradie, do you?
Sorry. Sorry, sorry.
(OLY SIGHS)
I think
that you look highly visible.
You like?
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
Ita, shh!
This day seems so well organised.
(GUEST SIGHS)
(BLOWS NOSE)
Sorry, mate, I just, um
I think I I think
I killed my grandad.
(WHISPERS) I have never drunk
fizzy drink at a funeral before.
What's she gonna say?
How do you eulogise an arsehole?
(SIGHS)
The upshot is
my dad won a bronze medal for canoeing
at the Commonwealth Games
and then he left my
mum when she had cancer.
That is
ch-ch-ch
Yeah, that's all that's worth saying.
(APPLAUSE)
Shh.
('RUMBA EN CAHUÍTA' BY PEROTÁ CHINGÓ)
One day I been to a festival ♪
Me and my melodious band ♪
They were having bacanal ♪
They were happy to see
the calypsonian, yeah ♪
One day I been to a festival ♪
Me and my melodious band ♪
They were having bacanal ♪
They were happy to
see the calypsonian ♪
Someone is playing the tumba ♪
Someone is ♪
Singing ♪
Melodiously ♪
But then they wanted a rumba ♪
And they beg me ♪
To bring them my melody ♪
And I'm singing ♪
Oye mi ♪
Rumba ♪
Mi rumba, mi rumba ♪
Mi rumba de Cahuíta ♪
Mi rumba chiquitita ♪
Pero baila la rumba, mi rumba ♪
Mi rumba, mi rumba ♪
Mi rumba ♪
Rumba de Cahuíta. ♪